API tools faq
paste
biograf

Biograf's Pastebin

2,490 246,624 0 4 years ago
Name / Title Added Expires Hits Comments Syntax  
My dentist says I don't brush enough but hey- Apr 29th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
My daughter came home from the toy store with a spherical Pixar fish toy. She asked me if I thought it was cute. Apr 29th, 2020 Never 35 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-29 10:45:43 Apr 29th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-29 10:01:05 Apr 29th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Copypasta: "Go fuck yourself" Apr 29th, 2020 Never 31 0 None -
What do you do after fucking the tightest pussy Apr 29th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
What do you call disabled children? Apr 29th, 2020 Never 18 0 None -
If video games make kids more violent, Apr 29th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
TIFU by buying a face mask Apr 28th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
Why are woman lucky with Corona? Apr 28th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-29 04:10:13 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 40 0 None -
What do you call an argument between two vegans ? Apr 28th, 2020 Never 20 0 None -
TIFU by realising that I have been fucking up for more than 5 years. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 34 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-29 01:59:57 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 29 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-29 01:04:20 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 20 0 None -
Copypasta: No, I completely disagree Apr 28th, 2020 Never 99 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 23:43:00 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 28 0 None -
Copypasta: In Korea 🇰🇵, heart surgeon ❤️👨‍⚕️ Apr 28th, 2020 Never 24 0 None -
TIFU by giving my husband a blowjob Apr 28th, 2020 Never 47 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 21:25:58 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
TIFU by sleeping in a wrong position and thus not being able to eat for two months Apr 28th, 2020 Never 23 0 None -
Copypasta: I found a mobile g*me on my son’s phone, he and his friends have all been punished Apr 28th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
A lumberjack went into a magic forest to cut a tree. Upon arrival, he started to swing at the tree. It shouted, “Wait! I’m a talking tree” Apr 28th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 18:26:02 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Copypasta: I'm not Insane, I'm Enlightened Apr 28th, 2020 Never 16 0 None -
Why is africa happy Apr 28th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 16:23:22 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 38 0 None -
They said we need to flatten the curve Apr 28th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
TIFU by throwing a literal bag of dicks down the wrong chute Apr 28th, 2020 Never 35 0 None -
My son got kicked out of three schools this year for letting a girl in class wank him off. I told him, “Son... Apr 28th, 2020 Never 28 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 13:31:47 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 25 0 None -
Copypasta: Found on an anti-America subreddit. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 25 0 None -
TIFU by sticking my hand in a hole in the yard. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
Copypasta: I, u/CummyBot2000, will delete my account if this comment gets either a single upvote or downvote. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 26 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 10:17:19 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 09:41:29 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 26 0 None -
Can we all agree that black lives matter? Apr 28th, 2020 Never 25 0 None -
I feel really bad for the class of 2020. They say the year really flies by. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 16 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 07:42:12 Apr 28th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
My girlfriend wants me to choose between her and my career as a reporter. Apr 28th, 2020 Never 18 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 05:59:53 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 29 0 None -
Copypasta: Why Harry Potter should have carried a 1911 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 20 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 04:55:26 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
TIFU by unpacking and wrapping my wife's gifts before bed. Apr 27th, 2020 Never 25 0 None -
Tifu by going to the grocery store Apr 27th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
How did Pinocchio find out he was a wooden boy? Apr 27th, 2020 Never 18 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-28 02:05:35 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 23 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-28 01:08:08 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 32 0 None -
Copypasta: I, u/CummyBot2000, will kill u/vicks-_-vaporub for trying to get me to kill myself. Apr 27th, 2020 Never 35 0 None -
Copypasta: Dear guy who just made my burrit... Apr 27th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
Copypasta: I u/CummyBot2000 will delete my account if this gets an upvote Apr 27th, 2020 Never 29 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 22:17:27 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
TIFU by eating a forbidden blueberry Apr 27th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 20:29:38 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 19:31:13 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Copypasta: My plan to get rid of the nut bag. Apr 27th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
TIFU by telling a girl to rip out her teeth to lose weight. Apr 27th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 16:52:46 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
Copypasta: Test Apr 27th, 2020 Never 22 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 15:08:16 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 15 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 14:22:17 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 13:43:26 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 29 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 13:06:57 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 11:35:49 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 10:36:10 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 16 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 09:42:08 Apr 27th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Apr 27th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
TIFU by getting a snack late at night Apr 27th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
You'd think that Catholic churches would be in favour of comdoms Apr 27th, 2020 Never 22 0 None -
TIFU by accidentally telling a customer i wanted to knock him out Apr 27th, 2020 Never 18 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-27 05:54:03 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 31 0 None -
TIFU by losing a drunk girl in a parking garage for over 3 hours and convincing hundreds of people she was kidnapped Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 04:34:58 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 17 0 None -
TIFU by making a cute video of my baby Apr 26th, 2020 Never 24 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 03:19:11 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
What do you do after you finish a magazine at school? Apr 26th, 2020 Never 24 0 None -
TIFU by taking the wrong medicine and almost killed myself. Apr 26th, 2020 Never 15 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-27 01:12:10 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
TIFU By watching anime with my wife Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-26 23:24:28 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 28 0 None -
TIFU by not realizing my parents don't go to church physically during quarantine, and listening to my porn on full volume in the bathroom. Apr 26th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-26 21:46:57 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
My little daughter came to me all excited, saying, “Daddy! Daddy! Guess how old I’ll be in August!” I said, “Oh I don’t know princess, why don’t you tell me?” She gave me a huge smile and held up four fingers... Apr 26th, 2020 Never 16 0 None -
Copypasta: Imagine Kim yo-jong Apr 26th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her personal trainer. Apr 26th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
Why don’t we know what’s going on with Kim Jong-un? Apr 26th, 2020 Never 22 0 None -
What's Irish and comes out in the spring? Apr 26th, 2020 Never 16 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-26 17:19:23 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 26 0 None -
Today I Learned 2020-04-26 16:48:55 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 27 0 None -
TIFU by pepper spraying myself Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Copypasta: "Simp" Apr 26th, 2020 Never 35 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-26 14:42:34 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 15 0 None -
TIFU by tried to have sex in a car with BF and got caught by cops Apr 26th, 2020 Never 30 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-26 12:56:39 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-26 11:57:22 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 23 0 None -
Where do you find a dog with no legs? Apr 26th, 2020 Never 18 0 None -
I don’t really like skiing... Apr 26th, 2020 Never 19 0 None -
TIFU by going into my fathers “recently deleted” folder on his iPhone. Apr 26th, 2020 Never 21 0 None -
Shower Thought 2020-04-26 09:06:19 Apr 26th, 2020 Never 23 0 None -
What’s the worst thing about being a black Jew? Apr 26th, 2020 Never 34 0 None -
Public Pastes
We use cookies for various purposes including analytics. By continuing to use Pastebin, you agree to our use of cookies as described in the Cookies Policy.  OK, I Understand
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up, it unlocks many cool features!