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- Title says it all. I told my girlfriend I was going for a nap, fully intending to finally try and get it in my mouth.
- I pretended to sleep for the first 10 minutes and when I thought the coast was clear, started stretching.
- Sucking my stomach in and stretching my neck as far as possible and contorting myself like a circus act, I almost made it.
- After spending 30 minutes trying, she walked into the bedroom to wake me up and found me in the bed with my shoulders wedged into the back of knees.
- I was so shocked, I tried to jump up but my legs were over my head and I fell sideways out of bed, smashing my head on the floor.
- She looked on in disgust and shock, turned around and left.
- This was an hour ago, she hasn't mentioned it and we're both pretending it didn't happen.
- TL;DR I tried to suck my own dick, got caught by my girlfriend and now it's fucking awkward
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