i am an infant
asking to be hurt
because i do not know how to say  no
i have unlearned my defenses
and so i am here
a bundle of nerve
begging you for hurt
give it to me
so i can eat it whole
the cross is not a punishment for the divine
it is my infancy bound with yours
an eye opened and wet
that does not know yet how to push the world
into forms
i do not know how to push you
i have forgotten what it means to be named
this is my price
i pay it so that i may hurt
this is no punishment for the dead
because love is the unknowing of the self
and i am knowing less and less
until i cannot be anything but