Chapter 44

You stood at the prow of  The Spirit of Dunes watching the speck in the distance grow closer. The sturdy ship had carried for more than a month on your way to the magical land of Zipangu. At long last, the end to your perilous journey was in sight. All you had to do was track down a ryu, romance her, and live happily ever after. Simple.

“AAAANNNOOOONNN!”

Princess Sabekar, heir to the throne of Kyriavalissa, daughter of your savior Pharaoh Nefkara, and your gracious host, wrapped an arm around you sloshing wine out of her cup and onto your good shirt. Fuck.

“You don look like you’re having any- any fun.” Said the young pharaoh.

She had been perpetually drunk the entire voyage. You got that it was her honeymoon and all, but the level of decadence and hedonism on board this boat was enough to make Dionysus blush. Everywhere you went, monsters were fucking their husbands. On the deck, in their cabins, on shore leave when the boat was docked, in the rigging, and even at the wheel. And when they weren’t fucking, they were drinking. When you had seen all the casks in the hold, you had assumed that they were to last you until you reached Zipangu. They barely survived until the first pitstop. Every port they visited brought new and wonderous spirits and brews onto the ship to be consumed in earnest.

This was not the dignified pleasure cruise you thought it would be. You imagined that the Sabekar would be more or less a smaller version of her mother: well mannered, wise, and proud. How wrong you were. When the ship docked, the princess would stumble out with her husband, always in some degree of sloven nudity, and raucously greet the adoring monsters who had gathered for her. To her credit, you hadn’t met a port official or royal executive that hadn’t been ecstatic to see her. Maybe this was more common in monster diplomacy than you had thought.

You had kept to yourself for the most part. A combination of malaise and the desire to avoid the single sailors put you in your cabin most of the time. The monsters exuded a tremendous amount of mana with their incessant fornication; enough to make you queasy. Not enough for any of the severe side effects of mana poisoning, but enough to be bothersome. Luckily, the mana did shroud your presence. The idea of being snapped up by a kraken or fish-woman had crossed your mind more than once when you boarded the ship, but there had only been a scant few instances where the ship encountered any unsavory ichthyoid agitators. All of which had been quickly dispatched by the marines on board tasked to protect the princess.

Not that you didn’t get out. There had been many nights where you had drank and sang with the monsters long into the night as you danced on the lantern lit deck. And the food? Incredible. Kyriavalissians really knew how to cook. Every morsel you ate was perfectly cooked and seasoned to perfection. So good, in fact, that you had drunkenly declared to one of the chefs that you would marry her if she wasn’t single. In addition to making the ghoul wildly uncomfortable and her husband incredibly jealous, your hyperbole also spawned a slew of nightmarish culinary creations as the bachelorette sailors tried to “sneak” their own dishes into your meal. Your stomach still hadn’t forgiven you for the clam surprise you had accidentally sampled.

“I am having fun, Highness. Shouldn’t you be sober?” you asked in annoyance, inspecting the splotch on your shirt. You’d have to change before you reached port.

“No!~ It’s my honeymoon, silly!” said Sabekar, taking another pull of wine.

“I see.”

“What? Every monster does this when they get married!~” she giggled.

“I don’t know about EVERY monster…”

“Well, they would if they could afford it. I know I’m the pharaoh’s daughter, but nobles in other cities do it too!”
“Drag their spouse on a drunken tour-de-fuck across the continent?” you asked.

“You don’t get it! This is the happiest moment of a monster’s life! Err, the beginning of the happiest moment of their life. Monsters like to celebrate marriages wherever you go. I’ve thrown my subjects TONS of wedding parties.”

“If you say so.” You said.

“I DO say so. Don’t make me MAKE you have fun.” Said Sabekar. She meant it, too. She had already used her god-voice to limber you up and make you dance or sing on more than one occasion. Sabekar laughed at her own joke.

“I can’t. I have to prepare myself.” You said.

“Boooo. All you’ve done so far is scribble in that book!” pouted Sabekar.

That you had. Your journal and all your belongings from earth were stuck with a vindictive moon-snake in Apliseline. Not a chance you were ever seeing those again. When you weren’t drinking, eating, or enjoying the sea breeze, you had been rewriting as many details as you could remember about earth. The idea that your identity was slowly slipping away as you forgot more and more of your past life had been haunting you the entire voyage.

“That ‘book’ is my most important possession. I’ll have time for parties after I finish my errand.” You said.

“I KNOW you’re looking for a wife~ I know this adorable khepri princess who’s just your type!” giggled Sabekar.

You glowered at her.

“So stiff! Fine, have it your way. Enjoy whatever demon or monster grabs you. I’ve got a husband to find~”

Sabekar wandered off to ‘search’ for her husband. You knew exactly where the poor bastard was: the bed she had left him in. You didn’t think he had ever been vertical for more than a few minutes the entire cruise. At least Sabekar dragged him out onto the deck every once and a while to fuck him on a lounge chair and give him some sun.

“So, Anon. I hear you’re looking for a wife…” said a mershark sailor. She gave you a toothy grin, showcasing rows of serrated teeth.

“Sorry, I’ve got someone in mind already.” You said.

“Could you be persuaded to change your mind?~” said the mershark, hefting her breasts and wiggling her eyebrows at you.

Damn these monsters. You weren’t sure if it was your slow transformation into an incubus or the weeks you had spent without masturbating, (a death sentence in these confined quarters), but it was harder to resist these girls every day.

“You couldn’t.” you said, turning back to the approaching land.

“Then maybe I’ll have to MAKE you change your mind.”

You whipped around, index finger alight with blue magic. The mershark stopped in her tracks. These monsters hadn’t seen much of your magic, but what they had seen had left an impression. Whenever the ship had been attacked, you were damn sure to support the marines in any way you could. Your survival depended on them winning, after all. It was also good practice. Nauraea didn’t let you train nearly as much as you’d like to. A couple of bolts were more than enough to convince the crew that attempting to take you by conventional means was a bad idea.

“Alright, fine, sheesh. I was just gonna squeeze you a little…”

The pattered off on her webbed feet. You watched as the harbor came into focus. Fishing boats milled about the docks, unloading their cargo or setting out in search of more quarry. Massive freighters sat perpendicular to piers as swarms of porters moved exotic goods onto the docks. The buildings were nothing short of what you expected. An architectural style that bore an uncanny resemblance to the traditional architecture of Japan back on earth. The idea hit you hard.

Zipangu. This was an alien land. Even if it WAS Japan, you would still be out of your element even on earth. Moving to new places like this was never easy. And now you had to carve an entire life in this strange new world.

You looked up at the mountains looming over the port city below and reassured yourself. This wasn’t anything you couldn’t handle. You had come into the mamono world without even knowing what plane of existence you were on, and did just fine. You had the skill to survive and the will to persevere. There wasn’t anything this island could throw at you that you couldn’t handle.

A harpy soared out over the water. The dark silhouette wheeled over the pharaoh’s ship a few times, and flew back to the city. No doubt Her Highness would cause quite the ruckus when she arrived. You would have to make a quick and quiet exit to avoid being caught in the revelry. There was no telling how many monsters in Zipangu knew of your existence, but you wanted to keep that number at a minimum. The fewer monsters that knew you were on this island, the better.

Your dream for a subtle escape was quickly shattered. As The Spirit of the Dunes got closer to port, more and more boats began to fall in behind the leviathan. You peeked over the balustrade. Two awestruck nekomata in a reed boat stared up at the passing ship as it chugged into port. One of them noticed you and nudged the other. Shit. You retreated to your cabin and packed your things. This might be closer than you thought.

~~~~~~~~~

“HELLO, MAMONO OF ZIPANGU!~” shouted Sabekar.

The crowd roared as Sabekar waved and blew kisses to the throng of onlookers. Her attendants began distributing gifts. You waited patiently out of sight, waiting for your chance to leave. It was inconvenient as hell, but you also had to say goodbye to Sabekar. Making a French exit on a Pharaoh was sure to bite you in the ass. Sabekar was absolutely the kind of person to get petty over such a thing. The last thing you needed when navigating the wilderness of Zipangu was a squad of gitablilu commandos snapping at your heels.
You inspected your possessions as the drunken princess continued her speech. “So good to be here, I’m so happy to see you all, look at my husband, blah blah blah.” You had heard it half a dozen times already. Soon, she would go with the city officials or local lords to some watering hole and enjoy the finest the city had to offer. When she broke away from the crowd to go drink with the big-wigs, you would dip in, give her your thanks, and be off.

“And I’d also like to introduce a very special friend of mine! Where… Where is he anyways?”

Your blood ran cold. You looked out the porthole in the door you stood behind. Sabekar and her husband were looking around. One of the marines noticed your face in the door and said something to the Pharaoh. Oh no…

“Anon! Come on! You’re missing the fun!” called Sabekar.

You adjusted your pack and dashed deeper into the ship. If you didn’t get out of earshot she wou-

“ANON. COME.”

Your neck jolted painfully as your body turned and hurried itself out the door. A horde of mystified onlookers gawked at you as Sabekar’s supernatural order planted you next to her.

“This is my good friend Anon!” she said, throwing her arms at you to emphasize your arrival. “Isn’t he cool? My mama, she rescued him from an apophis! He’s looking for a wife~”

You could only grit your teeth and stare at Sabekar as she drunkenly laughed. Her husband noticed your discomfort.

“Honey…” he mumbled.

“Hey! I know! Anon, say hello to them! In your language!” said Sabekar.

“Let me go.” You hissed.

Sabekar frowned.

“GREET THEM.”

Your head swiveled back to the monsters. “Hello! My name is Anonymous! It’s a pleasure to meet you all!” you said in English. The monsters were unsure what to make of the strange dialect. Sabekar was in hysterics.

“Ha! That’s the best reaction yet! Oh, what a funny sounding tongue!”

You stood awkwardly for a moment as Sabekar tried to collect herself. Some of the monsters were already making provocative gestures or faces at you. So much for subtlety.

“Mmm~ That was good. Where were we? Oh, right! The alcohol! I hear Zipangu has some exquisite brews!” said Sabekar.

“That we do, your majesty.” Said a jurou-gumo. She strode to the front of the crowd with her husband in tow.

“Wonderful! Lead the way.” Said Sabekar.

The crowd cheered for the princess as they parted for her, their pockets laden with opulent gifts. Whatever magic was in her voice broke as she walked away and you quickly dashed to her side again.

“Princess Sabekar, it’s been an honor and a privilege to be in your presence. I owe your mother my life, and I shall endeavor to pay her back properly one day. Words cannot express how grateful I am for your families timely intervention.”

Sabekar stared at you. “Huh? You’re leaving?”

“I am.”

Sabekar gave you a knowing smile. “You’re that eager to find her, eh?~”

You pursed your lips.

“Ah, I get it. Anonymous of Earth, it has been a pleasure to have you in my company. Good luck on your quest. And come visit when you find a wife! We can all celebrate!”

You clasped her hand and gave a quick bow. She gave you a knowing nod, and you scurried through the throng of monsters gathering to watch the princess as she went.

~~~~~~~

First things first: get supplies. No matter how far away a ryu was, you were going to need provisions and supplies to get you there. Nefkara had given you quite a hefty sum, so money wouldn’t be an issue when it came to the procurement of your gear.

“Excuse me, do you know where I can buy travel supplies?” you asked a lamia.

The snake-woman gave you a bewildered look. “Supp-lies?”

“Yes, travel supplies.” You said.

She stared at you. “Oh! That way. A few blocks.” She said, pointing up the street.

“Thank you.” you nodded.

Her misunderstanding and ambiguous directions didn’t bode well for you. Of all the trinkets to be left behind in Apliseline, the most pragmatic had been your trusty amulet of articulation. Your Common was all but fluent at this point, but you didn’t speak a word of Zipangunese. One of the diplomats on board had promised to teach you some. The lesson started out well enough, but then the liquor came and she spent the rest of the night trying to teach you obscenities. The lamia’s misunderstanding wasn’t necessarily damning of the whole island, but it was a firm reminder that you would have to choose your words carefully to avoid further misunderstandings.

Passing various shops, you peeked in from underneath your hood to see what each sold. Food, liquor, furniture, pottery… None of these looked like a travel store. They were usually so easy to find; spackled with eye-catching signs of all languages and symbols to attract as many travelers as possible. You only saw a scant few shops that had any Common at all. You paused in front of a bookstore. A port city like this was bound to have an eclectic collection of texts. And you were going to need something to pass the time on the road. Might as well spend your down time learning how to speak the language. It would be beyond embarrassing to reach a ryu only to be completely inarticulate.

You fumbled with the door for a second trying to figure out how to open it, and slid it aside. The interior of the shop was musty and dim. Shelves were lined with books of every shape and size, somehow organized into category by the tiny Zipangunese plaques on the shelves. Smoke mingled with the scent of the aged pages. It was a relaxing scent; good books and good herbs. You imagined yourself in a smoking jacket in front of a large fire thumbing through the latest publication. On second thought, that probably wasn’t your fate…

“Ah! A foreigner enters my shop. What wares can I get for you, handsome?”

A small raccoon woman grinned at you. Oh no.

“My! Aren’t you something. From where do you hail, stranger?” she said, cocking an eyebrow at you.

You pulled your cloak down lower around your face and tried to change the subject. “Here and there. Do you have any books that can help me learn Zipangunese? Novice level.”

The danuki blew smoke from her kiseru and leaned over her counter to try and see your face. You twisted to the side.

She snorted and shuffled out from behind her counter. “Shy are we? Let me see what I can find…”

You slunk into a corner of the bookshop to inspect some of the various tomes as the danuki muttered to herself. Every book you pulled off the shelf was in Zipangunese. There must be SOMETHING here you could read…

“Interested in a cookbook?” asked the danuki.

“Huh?” you asked.

She pointed to the book in your hand.

“Oh! No. Maybe. Do you have any in common?” you asked. Getting a small book of recipes might not be a bad idea. If you were going to be in the mountains for weeks at a time, you might as well learn how to feed yourself with more than just boiled mushrooms and charred game.

“I think I have one or two. Strange accent you have. You say you’ve done your share of travel?”

“Yes.”

“What’s your name?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

The danuki looked at you impassively. “Oh? It doesn’t?”

You thought about leaving then and there. This wasn’t good. There must be other stores in town. Nothing in here was a necessity.
“Fine. Keep your secrets. It’s of no consequence to me.” Said the danuki with a dismissive wave.

You breathed a sigh of relief. Causing a scene was the last thing you wanted to do.

“I take it you read on your travels, yes?” asked the danuki.

“When I can.” You replied.

“I envy you. You must have been able to read so many wondrous things during your journeys. All those different places, all those libraries and churches, teaming with knowledge. I do so love when I can acquire rare and unique books.”

You thought about your time in the Chiropta castle. The massive library that seemed to span into oblivion. An unlife’s worth of information packed into those endless shelves. And you had barely cracked one book.

“Have you ever been to Admaz?”

You stiffened. The danuki was facing away from you, hunched over a low shelf running her finger along the spines of the books as she went.

“There’s a school there. A college. They printed one of my favorite works.”

“Can’t say I’m familiar with the place.” You lied. Should have left when you had the chance…

“Do you know what that book is?” asked the danuki.

“I suppose it’s probably not a physics publication.”

“Far from it. You see, this college was blessed with a visitor. A strange human. A being from another world with mystical properties. An enigma. The college published a book about him. Though, I hesitate to call it a book. The volume itself is hardly more than a pamphlet, but the information contained within is downright fascinating. Language, customs, fashion, philosophies… I’ve read that book many times.”

The danuki turned around, book in hand. ‘How to speak Zipangunese: a primer.’ She sneered at you and spoke in broken English: “Isn’t dat inrestin?”

You glowered at her. Clearly the jig was up. The first shop you set foot in had to be the one run by the earth-aboo raccoon. Just your luck.

“How much for the book?” you growled.

“This old thing? Why, I don’t know if I could put a price on it.” Said the danuki.

“How much.”

The danuki took a hit from her pipe and looked you over. Here it comes. The lecherous grin, the ‘your body, ufufu,’ the groping attempt… It was all so tiresome.

“For you? One poem.”

You balked. “Excuse me?”

She took on a more serious demeanor. “Let’s drop the charade, Anonymous of Earth. We both know who you are, and we both know why you’re here. I’m not going to try and swindle you; I hear enough news from the rest of the world to know that buildings monsters try to keep you in have a bad habit of getting extemporaneous renovations. I know better than to try and threaten you.”

“Could have fooled me.” You said.

“Bah! That was just teasing. A bachelor like you is going to get torn to pieces in Zipangu if you can’t handle coquettishness.” Said the danuki.

“So, you want a poem in exchange for that book?” you said. Something about this deal seemed a little too good to be true.

“Precisely. It needn’t be long, and I’ll let you pick the subject matter.”

“I fail to see how you stand to profit off this bargain.” You said, folding your arms.

“As I said, I’m not just a merchant, I’m a collector. Having a one-of-a-kind poem written by an extradimensional being would be more valuable as a collector’s item or an asset if I needed to sell it. Oh, but do be a dear and leave a translation on the back, if you would.”

She had a point. Petropa had tried to sell one of the bills in your wallet to recoup some of the losses she had incurred capturing you. You managed to convince her not to sell it after a considerable amount of begging, but you knew she stood to make a mint selling the bill to another noble. Good thing vampires were suckers for groveling.

“Fine.”

The danuki’s face lit up. “Wonderful! I’ll go fetch the parchment.”

You flipped through the book she had picked for you. Sentence structure, vocabulary, common phrases, and a table of all the common symbols in Zipangunese. Perfect.

“Here we are.” Said the danuki, placing a piece of paper on the counter.

“This better not be some secret contract.” You said.

“Worry not, I promise you this is just an ordinary blank page.”

“Hmph. Anything in particular you had in mind?” you asked, dipping the quill into the ink.

“If you’re strapped for ideas, perhaps you could write of your first impressions of Zipangu.” Said the danuki.

“I can do that.”

‘Solemn summits stand stoic in a wasteland of waves. Silver mist on sacred slopes concealed the magic glades.

Land of guile, trick and wile, enchanted island land. The thing I fear is not the club but the vixen’s slight-of-hand.

My journey all but ended, my lover all but found. All that remains is to keep myself, lest I become unwound.’

You put the quill down. It would have been best to omit the last section, but you doubted that it would cause any problems.

The danuki looked it over. “Hmm. Interesting. Would you be so kind as to leave a translation?”

You bit your lip. Would a fake translation be enough to fool her? Probably not. It would be better to leave an ambiguous interpretation of the text. You blew onto the paper to dry the ink and scribbled out a short interpretation of the poem.

“Wonderful. This is a fine piece.” Said the danuki.

“Great.” You said. You threw the book into your pack and headed for the door.

“Oh, Mr. Human.” Called the danuki. She waggled a cookbook at you. “Free of charge, for being such a good sport about everything.”
“Free?” you said skeptically.

The danuki frowned and blew smoke at you. “Yes, free. A young man like yourself should be taking care of himself. Just promise me you won’t starve yourself, wherever you’re headed.”

You took the cookbook. Couldn’t hurt.

“Where are you headed? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“That’s my business I’m afraid. Good day.”

You hurried out of the shop before the danuki could try to set anymore hooks into you. Something about her made your skin crawl. She hadn’t made a move on you, but there was something undeniably sinister about her.

Standing at an intersection you looked for an adventuring shop. Time to kit up.

~~~~~~~

This was it. ‘Expeditions, Adventures, Provisions and Weapons!’ proclaimed a sign out front. You hoped that this was one of the guild-less establishments. Nothing worse than having to fork over a huge chunk of cash for guild fees the second you set foot inside.
Humans and monsters milled about near the door as you slid inside. Good to see them getting along so well. And other humans were always a good buffer against monsters. The more men there were, the lower your chance of getting snagged.

A few monsters looked up from their drinks as you entered. Pulling your hood lower, you stuck to the wall and sidled over to the counter. The cyclops behind the bar/service counter (it seemed that anything that was sold slid over this greasy surface) asked you something in Zipangunese.

“Do you speak Common?” you asked.

She grunted. “My mistake, stranger. Aren’t you a little small to be in here? If you’re here for anything but a wife, I suggest you turn around.”

“Never mind that. I need trail supplies. Food, a tent, spare clothes, and maps.”

The cyclops gave you a worried look. “Human, I don’t know what land you come from, but Zipangu is a harsh mistress. The roads are safe and the people kind, but I urge you not to stray from the beaten path.”

“I know what I’m in for. Can you help me or not?” you said firmly.

The cyclops sighed. “Where are you going?”

“I uhh… I don’t really have a set destination in mind.”

The cyclops glared at you. “Are you trying to waste my time, foreigner?”

“No! I- Listen,” you leaned farther over the bar. “Is there a ryu nearby? A single one?”

“Ryus are mostly solitary. They don’t form packs.” Said the Cyclops.

“That’s not what I meant. Are there any ryu nearby that are unwed?”

The cyclops stood up. She gave you a knowing smile. “Ahh. I see how it is. You must be very dedicated with your ‘worship’ to come all this way. Not many foreigners make it this far. Even fewer reach the mountains.”

“I’m not most foreigners.” You said.

The cyclops was unimpressed by your boast. “If I had a coin for every time I’ve heard that phrase, I’d own a castle.”

“I’m serious.”

“Mmm hmm. Fools like you are the reason Zipangu is in the state its in. Lilith knows how many ushis are spawned because of hubris like that.”

“What do you mean ‘the state its in?’ I haven’t seen anything too damning yet.” You said.

The cyclops raised her eyebrow. “You came all this way, and you don’t have any idea what’s going on? How did you get this far?”

You felt your face redden. “This is pointless! Are you going to help me, or shall I find somewhere else to take my business?”

The cyclops uttered a defeated sigh and called for her husband to fetch her some maps. A small man emerged from a back room carrying an armful of furled paper.

“If you’re looking for a ryu, the best place you can look is in the Valley of Storms.” Said the Cyclops tapping a wide valley in the middle of the island.

“The Valley of Storms…” you muttered to yourself.

“As the name suggests, ryus have made their home there for millennia. When a daughter is old enough to leave her mother’s shrine, many opt to move farther down the valley.”

“Perfect. I’ll take it.” You said.

“Not so fast, foreigner. The Valley may be home to the most ryus, but you’ll be hard pressed for an audience with them. They’ve got a veritable army of suitors constantly petitioning for their hand in marriage. Kings, nobles, merchants, wizards, every upper echelon of society gathers there in a bid to marry ryus. In your case, it might be better to take a less traveled path.”

She unrolled another map. This one was covered in small red marks, mostly falling along the coast or in the mountains.

“Fortunately, ryus aren’t exclusive to the Valley of Storms. Plenty of other summits to choose from. No idea if they’re wed or not, though. The gods don’t usually come down from their shrines that often. And unlike the Valley, there will only be one ryu per shrine. If she’s spoken for, it may be decades before another is born.”

“I’ll take them both.” You said.

The cyclops’ eye widened. “Slow down there, foreigner. Maps aren’t cheap. You’re going to need quite a sum to afford-“

You pulled a handful of coins out of your pouch and stacked them on the map. You weren’t sure what the exchange rate was between Kyriavalissian staters and Zipangunese mon was, but Nefkara had assured you that it would be sufficient to buy you anything you needed. The cyclops eyed the coins and inhaled sharply.

“Well, seems as if I was mistaken about you. Clearly you have some friends in high places.” She said.

You slid the maps over and traced your finger along the roads. It seemed like most of the ryu temples were well off the beaten path. Roads tended to run through the valleys and passes of Zipangu; ryus were primarily located in the mountains with only a few blips on the coast. A few smaller paths ran through the mountains, adjacent to the shrines.

“I wouldn’t if I were you.” Said the cyclops somberly.

“Huh?” You looked up from the map.

“Foreigner, if you’re planning to wed a ryu, stay away from the mountains. That’s Kamaka territory. If you want to get to the Valley of Storms, travel along the coast. A single man won’t make it an eighth of the way taking the high roads.” Said the cyclops.

“What is the Kamaka?” you asked.

“You should have done some research about this place instead of coming to chase fairytales. The Kamaka shogunate is the great thorn in the side of all Zipangu. And soon to be the rest of the world for that matter…” grumbled the cyclops.

“They’re the local rulers?” you asked.

“They most certainly are not!” said the cyclops, clenching her fist. “They’re a bloodthirst band of marauders. What started as a small gang of bandits swelled into a paramilitary force, and then into a pirate fleet that plunders up and down the west coast. Every day, they grow bolder. Now the bastards are even striking out to loot villages in the Mist Continent and beyond.”

“Why hasn’t anyone stopped them?” you asked.

The cyclops sighed. “This is a peaceful land. Many of the mamono here are content with their idyllic lives. They aren’t fighters. Once, a gang of militias gathered to try and strike them down. The shogun beat them back and followed them home to loot their village. And the shogun is very… generous to her allies. Moegara brings in hundreds of men to slake the thirst of her subjects, and distributes the rest to the villages on the fringes of her empire to butter them up. I hoped that the population boom would devolve into infighting as resources became scarce, but the shogun has managed to keep them unified.”

“Wow…” you said.

And here you were thinking that a rouge kunoichi dojo or errant shirohebi would be your biggest obstacle.

“Can you outline where the shogun’s territory is?” you asked.

“Roughly. Some of these areas are contested. And there are still pockets of resistance within the ‘established’ borders of Moegara’s empire. I heard that some of her raiders ran into an extended family of ushi-onis trying to track down a runaway boy. Didn’t end well for them.” Chuckled the cyclops as she used a fine red paintbrush to denote the region the raiders were active in. You tensed as her brush passed over the roads you had considered taking.

“There. That may be a bit generous, but it’s best not to take any chances. It’s impossible to say how far her influence has truly spread.”

“Thank you. Is there anything else you can tell me about Moe-uhh… whatever her name is?” you asked.

“She’s an oni. Bigger than most and smarter than any other I’ve ever heard of. Her followers are mostly club-swinging barbarians, but don’t let that fool you. They’re well disciplined. As they’ve spread into the village, they’ve begun to bolster their ranks with magicians and incorporate minor stateswomen from towns to help manage the war machine. If you’ve got the skill, you can rise through the ranks and live comfortably.”

“Nice to hear that she’s an egalitarian…” you said.

The cyclops chuckled. “Hardly. I don’t know what hand of fate touched Moegara, but she’s also been blessed with more than her fair share of daughters. She may run the operation, but it’s her daughters that do the dirty work.”

You looked at the massive red ring radiating out from the dot labeled Kamaka. For all the cyclops’ doomsaying and foreboding, you found it hard to imagine that this warlord would be any more than a nuisance to you. Armies could be easily avoided. You were far more warry of individual inari or a small squad of kunoichi than you were a horde of vagabonds.

“So, what will it be, foreigner? Are you going to make a break for a ryu, or are you going to stay here and rethink your options? I have rooms for rent, if you’re interested.” Said the cyclops.

You pushed the pile of coins toward her. “I didn’t come this far to sleep.”

She smiled and handed you the map. “I like the way you think, foreigner. Going to the Valley, then?”

“I suppose I am.” You said, inspecting the distance to the Valley of Storms.

“Good people in that valley. Crops grow there better than anywhere else on the island. Hell, the whole world for all I know. I suppose that’s what happens when half your neighbors are gods. Hmm…”

She looked at you and frowned.

“What?” you asked.

“It’s just that… You don’t look very strong… No offence, foreigner.” She said.

“We’ve been over this. I’m not worried-“

“About some eccentric bachelorettes ruining your wedding, I know. But it’s going to take more than a month on foot to reach the Valley. The provisions alone would fill that bag you’re carrying.”

You gulped. A month? That was dangerously close to the term limit Voso had given you on your contract. And if you didn’t make it in time, that meant you were going to be plastered with a mana-marker for almost half the species on the island. Which meant that your chances of finding a ryu were effectively zero, unless you were right in front of one.

“Forget the food. I’ll take what I can carry and buy the rest from the town I pass through.” You said.

The cyclops frowned. “If you insist. Just don’t starve to death out there. Now, how about a tent?”

~~~~~~~~

After an hour and a fierce bout of haggling, you were ready to strike out.

“That should do it. I have to say, I like the way you bargain, stranger. Not many men have the guts to haggle like that with me.”
You adjusted your pack. “Always a pleasure. Thanks for all the gear.”

She nodded. “I don’t know what kind of training you have or where you came from, but I get the feeling that you’re tougher than you look. Be safe out there, okay? And come back when you find your wife! I’ll give you a drink on the house.”

You nodded. Taking another stater, you slid it to her. “If anyone asks about a human like me, don’t say anything. I’m on a tight schedule, and I’d prefer not to have any extraneous delays.”

She cocked her brow and took the coin. “Err, alright. I don’t normally discuss clientele, but if you insist. Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay the night here? It’s already past noon. And the rates are very reasonable, if I do say so myself.”
You shook your head and adjusted your cloak. “I can’t. Thank you for everything, I’ll be sure to recommend you to anyone in need of supplies.”

You grabbed the rest of your belongings off the counter and wandered out the door. A few minutes later, you were standing in the gateway of the city. The sprawling Zipangu countryside rolled into the distance. A breeze bearing the sweet floral scent of the lush land tickled your nose. This was it! Onward, to your wife!

~~~~~~~~~

“Shogun!” squawked a harpy.

Moegara grimaced at the shrill cry of the bird. How many times did she have to tell them not to bother her in her home? The harpy landed in the courtyard of the mansion and stood in front of the massive oni. Moegara picked up her husband and set him aside.
“Must I remind every one of you peons not to disturb me here?” she growled.

The harpy flinched. “I-I understand, Moe- Shogun, but there is urgent news!”

Moegara groaned and poured herself another cup of sake. If this wasn’t worth her time, she was going to pluck this glorified chicken.
“Get on with it then.” Said Moegara.

“One day ago, a ship docked at a southern port city. The Spirit of the Dunes.” Said the harpy.

“And?”

“It’s a royal ship. Belonging to Pharaoh Nefkara.”

“Hmm… A Pharaoh huh?” said Moegara.

“Err, no. Princess Sabekar was the one on the ship. She’s visiting various costal cities in the east to celebrate her marriage and to strengthen the bond between her new empire and Zipangu.”

“Feh! I don’t recall her ever sending ME an invitation. Still, pirating a royal ship is just inviting trouble. For now.” Moegara took a sip of her sake. “I suppose we could try to ransom her. No, what am I saying? Same problem. I’d need to enlist the help of an apophis to fight off Nefkara’s army.”

“There’s more! The boat was carrying someone else. A human. Apparently, some kind of powerful mage.”

“Are you dull? If he came with the princess, then it’s still too risky to kidnap him.” Said Moegara.

“He is no longer in the company of the princess, Shogun.”

“Oh?”

“The man is apparently looking for a wife.”

Moegara perked up. “A wife, you say?”

“Yes, shogun.”

Moegara frowned. “Where did you learn all this?”

“The human was apparently in contact with a merchant in the town he disembarked in. She claims that she has information for sale and asks for an audience with you.” Said the harpy.

Moegara laughed. “So does every other pomp and pauper on this half of the island! What makes her so special? That fool told you everything there is to know already: there’s a mage bumbling about southern Zipangu. Let the girls know; I care little who finds him.”

“She insisted that this human was special, Shogun. And claims that any audience will be worth your time.”

“My time is VERY valuable.” Said Moegara.

The harpy fidgeted. “She also said you would say that. And she offered me this as proof of her word.”

The harpy handed Moegara a gold coin.

“A Kyriavalissian stater. Hmph. Her offer is still weak. Mages often come to this land seeking enlightenment or power. I highly doubt that this one is any different. Tell her that I accept her invitation and expect to be THOROUGHLY compensated for this interruption if I deem her information to be worthless.”

“Yes, Shogun.” Said the harpy. She took off into the sky and flew south.

“That was uncharacteristic of you.” Said Moegara’s husband, gently rubbing her thigh.

“What can I say? You put me in an altruistic mood. Besides, that merchant is going to be bringing a whole chest of coins if she knows what’s good for her. A wizard… Hah! As if that’s anything special. One of the lieutenants caught some wandering monk just last month.”
“She sounded certain that this was something special.”

“Bah. That’s what every one of these unctuous fools trying to garner my favor say. And every treasure, human, or lead they give me always ends the same way: in disappointment. I’ve no reason to believe this will be any different.”

~~~~~~~~

“Oh, mighty Shogun! It is truly an honor t-“

“Spare me the drivel, sycophant. Either you give me useful information in the next minute, or you pay me for the privilege of my time.”

“Of course, Shogun. I know that you’re a busy woman, so I’ve taken the liberty of preparing THIS for you.” Said the danuki, flourishing a scroll.

One of Moegara’s attendants brought the scroll to Moegara. The oni unrolled it and looked it over.

“And what exactly am I reading?” said Moegara.

“A dossier, Shogun. All pertinent information I could compile on the human.”

Moegara hummed. The information was interesting, but it read like a fantasy story.

“Do you expect me to believe this?” asked Moegara angrily.

“I admit, his story seems rather implausible without proof.” Said the book merchant.

“Implausible is putting it lightly.” Growled Moegara.

“Which is why I have also brought proof of this human’s existence and purported powers!”

The danuki rummaged through her bag and pulled out a stack of books and pamphlets. Moegara gestured to one of the crow-tengu to take the pile.

“These seals are authentic, Shogun. The writing style seems consistent too.” Said the tengu, looking through some of the pamphlets.
Moegara ignored her. The more she read about this human, the more enthralled she became. Driven, clever, and most importantly, immensely powerful. And he wasn’t even an incubus yet.

“I see. And you claim this… ‘Anonymous’ is here in Zipangu.” Said Moegara.

“I know him to be.” Smiled the danuki.

Moegara finished reading the synopsis of the human. Good men were always in demand in the Kamaka shogunate. The best men, the royals who they captured, were married to Moegara’s daughters to gain claims to other empires. By ruthlessly interjecting her own bloodline into royal succession, her several of her daughters had claims to a few minor Mist Continent thrones. But Moegara wasn’t sure if this human was marriage material. A strong wizard meant strong grandchildren, and an important link in the successional chain. But this man was by all accounts no more than a powerful vagabond. Without even a clod of land to his name, it might be better for her unmarried daughters to wait until another prince could be captured.

“I see that you are still hesitant.” Said the danuki.

“Claims are one thing. Backing them is another.” Said Moegara.

“Indeed. I understand your apprehension. I understand that there are only so many daughters to be wed off; a woman of your status can’t afford to have them marry just any peasant! But I assure you, with this man on your side, you’ll have enough power to conquer the entire west side of the island!” said the danuki.

Moegara glared at her. “Don’t think you can fool me with such flattery, merchant.”

“Deceiving you is the last thing I would wish for, Shogun. If you still have reservations about this human, why not track him down? See for yourself the power he wields. If you are underwhelmed, I swear to pay you double what you are owed for the inconvenience.” Said the danuki.

Moegara eyed the danuki warily. She hated these creatures. No matter what she did, it ALWAYS seemed like they got the better end of the deal. And they always had something up their sleeve…

“I think I shall. You said that he was in the port city in the south?” said Moegara, trying to gauge the danuki’s reaction.

“I did.”

“Hmm. Torquatus, send a-“

“And he was.”

Moegara stared at the impudent danuki.

“You, little, weasel. If you EVER think to be clever like that again, I’ll crush you where you stand. Understood?” said Moegara, grabbing the handle of her club.

“Of course, Shogun! I meant no disrespect!” said the danuki.

Moegara kept her hand on the hilt of her club. She was tempted to smack the danuki a couple of times just to beat that smug grin off her face. But that would have to be done after every morsel of useful information was collected. And one could never be certain when that was with a danuki.

“Unfortunately, the human is no longer in the city. He left the day he arrived, apparently in quite the hurry.” Said the danuki.
“And how long ago was that?” asked Moegara.

“Four days ago.”

The monsters of Moegara’s court muttered amongst themselves.

“Well, he has to be heading north. And since my forces haven’t seen him yet, that means he’s traveling on the east side of the island. Catching him will be a simple task; all we need to do is figure out how far a human can move in a day and patrol the roads where we expect him to be.” Said Moegara.

“I wouldn’t be so sure, Shogun. That man is trained at Valisias Academy. And he purchased camping supplies as well. He’s more than prepared to survive in the wilderness if need be. You can’t count on roadblocks to catch this human.”
Moegara stroked her chin. That certainly did complicate things. Most nobles were easy pickings because they stuck to the roads. If the information the danuki had provided was true, this Anonymous character would be more than capable of traversing the countryside without use of roads. And if he caught wind of soldiers coming, then he would go into hiding for certain.

“But fear not! For I have a solution most elegant to find this human.” Said the danuki.

Moegara grit her teeth. Of course, she did. Even in her own court, this damnable merchant still managed to swindle her.

“Let’s see it then.” Growled Moegara.

“Behold!” said the danuki, flourishing a compass.

“I take it that points to Anonymous?” said Moegara.

“In a sense, yes. It points to one of the possessions I gave to him. One that I doubt he will part with. The compass itself is dormant, but when imbued with magic, will point towards Anon.”

“Who?”

“Ah, forgive me. That is the name the human most often goes by.” Said the danuki.

“I see.”

“I must advise that you not overuse the spell either. Anon may catch on to the enchanted property of the book if used too often.” Explained the raccoon girl.

“You sold him an enchanted book?” asked Moegara.

“It was more of a gift to him. As far as he knows, it is merely a recipe book.” Said the danuki.

Moegara chuckled. “You danuki really are unscrupulous, aren’t you?”

The danuki smirked. “The way I see it, I’m just prioritizing my more important clientele.”

“So you are. Now, about my fee…”

Moegara sighed. “Out with it then.”

“For the information about the human I’ve collected and arranged, and the compass, I posit that a sum of twenty thousand mon should suffice.”

The courtiers joined Moegara as she roared with laughter.

“Surely you jest! The time that trinket would save isn’t worth a quarter of that sum. The same goes for the dossier you gave me.”
“That man is most certainly worthy of marrying one of your daughters, you will see. The way I see it, you’re paying the dowry for him.” Said the danuki.

Moegara snorted. “He isn’t yours to give. Five thousand will suffice. Half now, and half if the human is all you have made him out to be.”

“Twelve thousand.” Said the danuki.

“Five. Thousand.” Hissed Moegara.

“Ten thousand.”

“FIVE TH-“

“Eight thousand! Final offer.” Said the danuki.

Moegara thought for a moment. She smirked at the danuki. “Alright, eight thousand it is. Torquatus, see that our friend here gets paid.”

The crow tengu bowed and went to fetch the money.

The danuki's tail waggled happily as she watched the tengu leave. “Wonderful! In the meantime, I’ll teach one of your mages the spell to activate the compass.”

Moegara watched as the raccoon taught the spell to several of the attending mages. Just the thought of this shyster getting the better of her made her blood boil. Being treated like a fool in one’s own court wasn’t just humiliating; it could weaken an entire empire if it was severe enough. Moegara smiled. She knew how to work these merchants. This wasn’t the first con-woman to try and fleece her. Even the most elaborate scheme could be undone when force was applied in the right places…

 Torquatus soon returned, accompanied by a minotaur carrying a chest full of coin. Moegara watched the danuki open it and gleefully inspect her prize.

“You’ve been most helpful. Thank you.” Said Moegara.

The danuki beamed. “A pleasure to serve, Shogun. And I hope that you will keep me in mind for any future business needs. I assure you, I will prove to be a valuable partner in any mercantile matters.”

Moegara smiled sweetly at her. “Oh, I’ll keep you in mind. You certainly are a crafty one. What is your name?”

“Vivern, Shogun.” Said the danuki.

“I see. Do you know why I’m going to keep you in mind, Vivern?” asked Moegara in saccharine tone.

Vivern’s brow furrowed a bit. Moegara sneered as the danuki’s smug countenance cracked.

“Why, I hope it is because you wish to deal with me in the future, Shogun.” Said Vivern.

“No, merchant.” Moegara stood up from her throne and slowly walked towards the tiny danuki. “I’m afraid my court doesn’t have any room for back-biting, underhanded, cowards such as yourself. No, I’m going to remember you for a different reason…”

Vivern took a step back.

“I’m going to keep you in mind incase I find this human. Because if he really is as powerful as your books claim him to be, and for your sake I hope he is, then I’ll marry him to one of my daughters. Do you know what that will make him?”

“A prince?” asked Vivern softly.

“Oh, he’ll be so much more than a prince.” Said Moegara, now towering over the danuki. Vivern scarcely passed her waist. “He’ll be my son-in-law. And I don’t take kindly to treacherous vermin like you cheating my family.”

Vivern stumbled backward over the chest. “Y-you wouldn’t hurt me! After all I’ve given you? You can’t cheat me like this!” she squeaked.

“Cheat you? Oh, no. I wouldn’t DREAM of it.” Said Moegara slamming a foot down on top of the chest. “I’m not going to lay a finger on you. You’re free to take this money and leave.”

“T-Then leave I shall!” said Vivern with a nervous chuckle. She tried to tug the chest out from Moegara’s foot, but the oni put more of her weight onto the already cumbersome box.

“But I will be telling my son-in-law about the book seller who wronged him.” Said Moegara.

Vivern’s face paled. “What?! Why?!”

“Because he’ll be my family. And I don’t like people who fuck with my family. Surely if it was the innocent act you make it out to be, you can just explain it to him, no? Ahh, but then again…” Moegara looked at the scroll again and shook her head. She winced and tutted a few times. “…He DOES have a history of blasting people he doesn’t like, doesn't he? Says that he’s traveled halfway around the world to try and find a wife. I wonder how far he would travel for revenge?”

Moegara kicked the chest. It toppled backward, spilling its contents over the stones of the courtyard. Vivern righted the chest and frantically scooped the coins back in.

“You bastard! You won’t get away with this! The other merchants will hear about this! Don’t think you can intimidate me like this an-“

“The other merchants won’t do a damn thing. They want my business, and they know that I have the contacts to replace them if they get as insolent as you. You are replaceable, don’t ever forget that. As for the first claim you made, yes, I am being a bit of a bastard today. So, I’ll let that slide. But if you EVER say that to me again…”

Moegara slammed a fist down onto the coin Vivern was reaching for. The danuki shrieked as the oni’s massive fist crushed a hole in the ground. Moegara pulled the bent coin off her knuckle and flicked it at the shivering danuki. “I'll make certain that you're reminded of your place in MY empire.”

Vivern bared her teeth at the shogun, but was powerless to do anything about her humiliating predicament. Moegara sat back down on her throne and watched the tiny woman lug the chest out of the court.

“I think that spectacle alone was worth eight thousand mon.” said Moegara.

The court laughed. Moegara smiled. This truly was the finest court in the land. Every monster here had their place and pulled their weight. None of those pompous fops that infested the halls of other palaces. Everyone here earned their place with the strength of their sword arm and the unflinching loyalty of their spirit. Someday, it would be the court that ruled all of Zipangu.

“Torquatus, call my darling daughters. I have a new task for them…”