Agent Nonimo - Ch. 004

Mar 17th, 2017
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  1. >You are Lyra, recent anthropology studies graduate
  2. >You have been dedicated to earn your daily bread by playing your lyre in different parts of Equestria for these last few months
  3. >You’re not going through your best moment, your days are spent waiting for a reply from the Equestrian Orquestra to your job application
  4. >You might not have a job, but at least you have a lyre. It has special significance to you
  5. >It was a gift from your grandma when you were a tiny five year old filly
  6. >At first your lyre gave you claps and cheers from some family members and friends
  7. >Later it gave you your cutie mark
  8. >It allowed you to meet some interesting friends, like the talented and mercantile business pony, Octavia
  9. >She taught you more than a thing or two about the music business
  10. >You’re currently in Ponyville putting some of her business teachings to use
  11. >You have never been here! It’s a small town, but it feels so warm and cozy
  12. >The local ponies are impressed by your musical notes, some show this by tossing you a few coins
  13. >Suddenly you hear a stomping hussle
  14. >You see a cream coated pony with a purple mane using some weird goggles approaching you at high speed
  15. >She crashes into you
  17. >You are Bonbon, on your first secret agent mission
  18. >Now you’re tracing and tracking a transdimensional spider
  19. >It’s not dangerous or poisonous, it can do nothing but giving small bites
  20. >But it’s also invisible! And if somepony finds it, then what? Then the secret project might be discovered by some evil organization’s operatives
  21. >Just when you’re about to catch it, the fleet footed spider scampers to the side just out of reach
  22. >It’s running through the Ponyville park
  23. >You already have it, you have to have it!
  24. >An inch further and you’ll have the spider caught in your hooves
  25. >You stumble over someone, crash hard, and take a tumble
  26. >Seeing stars, you get up from the ground
  27. >Looking at your obstacle, you huff in annoyance. it seems you were hit by an idle unicorn
  28. ”Damnit! I lost it” you complain loudly toward the sky, only to next ask to the unicorn
  29. “a-are you okay?”
  30. > “Yes… wait a second, where is my lyre?” Her eyes dart about as she searches for her absent musical instrument
  31. “Oh, no…”
  32. > You lament as your eyes rest on the mauled harp.  
  33. >”What happened--”
  34. >She sees her lyre, destroyed off in the bushes
  35. >At first she doesn’t say anything
  36. >She slowly turns her head to you
  37. >Her pupils shrink smaller than a Breezies
  38. >The air feels thick and dense. You swear you could cut it with a knife
  39. >You feel the incoming universal judgement
  40. >You mumble
  41. ”So-so-sorry, I will pay the damage”
  42. >Without hesitation you gave her a bag with bits
  43. >”Money? MONEY?!” and she starts to laugh, louder every second “Do you even know  what that lyre is worth to me?”
  44. “A-a lot?”
  45. >“Tsk-tsk. More.” Lyra’s voice trails off into silence as she removes her eyes from the broken lyre to look at you
  46. > ”This wasn’t just an instrument, it was an extension of my soul you… you… silly filly!” and she start laughing only for her laughter to turn into tears and hopeless sobs.
  47. ”Sorry, I didn't realize it was so important to you”
  48. >She sighs looking at the shattered remains of her lyre
  49. >”It doesn’t matter… You didn’t do it on purpose, after all.” and she slowly walks away limp as a rag doll pulled on strings
  50. >You killed her
  51. >This lyre was a part of herself
  52. >Now it’s just junk
  53. >You have to do something
  54. >This was your mistake and somehow you’re gonna fix it
  55. >But, how? It’s not like you can simply rearrange everything again as if by magic
  56. >Magic
  57. >Of course!
  58. >You carefully pick up all the pieces of the musical instrument
  59. >You look for the secret entrance to the agency
  60. >Once there, you go straight to the laboratory
  61. >There he is, your old classmate Bio
  62. >You met him in the Canterlot preparatory
  63. >He was like your old brother
  64. >He protected you from the mockery from unicorns there
  65. >It wasn’t easy being a teen earth pony in a school with so many unicorns
  66. >“What gives Bonbon, you look devastated”
  67. >You give him the lyre pieces
  68. ”Can you fix it? Please” you beg to your old friend
  69. >”Let’s see...” he rubs her chin while he look at the pieces and then a golden ray comes out from his horn. In 10 minutes the lyre returns to his original state. He looks fatigued
  70. ”Bio! Are you okay?” the appearance of Bio is concerning you
  71. >”Yes, yes. It just it was a very hard spell, but go quickly to return this to its owner”
  72. “What? What’s going on?”
  73. >”That lyre isn’t just an ordinary musical instrument. I never felt an object with so much life attached, it must be extremely important to her”
  74. >You call his brother, Jade to take care of him and then you leave the HQ
  75. >Back in the city, you search that mint unicorn again
  76. >It’s raining
  77. >You ask some people to find her
  78. >After a while you found her
  79. >She’s in a bar, drinking something with her mane covering her eyes
  80. >You approach her but she doesn’t even look at you
  81. “Hey, I know I screw it very, very hard…”
  82. >She doesn’t move and you leave the lyre on the table
  83. >She slowly turn her head to see it
  84. “Well, I think I did my job, see you later…”
  85. >But before you reach the door you hear a scream “Wait!”
  86. ”Yes?” you turn to her side
  87. >”What is this?”
  88. “Your lyre… aren’t you happy now?”
  89. >”It’s not that… it is in fact my lyre, but how you did it?”
  90. “Mmmm… I have my contacts…”
  91. >”Contacts? It was a damn wizard who did this!”
  92. “Okay, I know a unicorn who helped me with that”
  93. >”This is not just a repair, it looks brand new”
  94. “Come on, it’s not that great!”
  95. >”Are you kidding? This is the best restoration I’ve ever seen in my life… and you did it for me…”
  96. “It was my mistake, I was obliged to fix it”
  97. >”No, I’m in debt with you. I only can pay you playing some songs for you. Auch!”
  98. “What’s wrong?”
  99. >”I don’t know, I felt like something bited me on my shoulder, but I can’t see anything there”
  100. >It must be the transdimensional spider. You take it with caution and I put it inside a jar
  101. >”What was that?”
  102. >Taking an invisible bug from somepony it’s not a good idea
  103. “I was… giving you a Prench massage! I think it worked, you still feel the bites?”
  104. >”No! It worked. Would you like to come to my apartment? I want to start a jam session for you”
  105. “Why?” you laugh
  106. >”I don’t know, you are weird, mysterious” she gets closer to your face “and cute”
  107. >You blush and chuckle “I think you drank too much booze…”
  108. >”No…” and she laughs, and then boops you
  109. “I didn’t ask your name by the way”
  110. >”Lyra Heartstrings” and she winks at you
  111. “Maybe I should go to your place with you”
  112. >”Okey dokey lokey, who’s the crazy mare now?”
  113. >That makes you laugh
  115. >Back to the present
  116. >You’re Anom
  117. >You heard that story and it’s over at the same time that you get served some hot chocolate
  118. >It was pretty nice
  119. >You need to hold your tears
  120. >These cute and sentimental stories have always been your kryptonite
  121. >”So Anom, I hope you enjoyed the story”
  122. >You have to keep a good image of yourself, being a tough guy
  123. “Yes, it was pretty… interesting, it was useful to understand the dynamics of your team”
  124. >Did they buy it?
  125. >Lyra and Bonbon look at each other with confusion and then they laugh
  126. >”Anom, you’re so cute when you try to be serious…” Lyra scoffs while Bonbon tries to keep her laugh
  127. “Come on girls, I know how nice and harmless I look, but inside this body I’m a man who has a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that will be the end of it.
  128. >Well, now both of they are confused. Bonbon asks you “Do you have a daughter?” and Lyra is befuddled “Was that a threat?”
  129. >Quoting movies that doesn’t exist in this universe is not a good idea. Let alone throwing entire phrases without any context
  130. >I guess that Discord or Pinkie Pie can get away with that because they have fourth wall powers
  131. “Haha, I was quoting something from my world…” you clarify a bit nervous
  132. >”Ahhh, OK. Do you want to hear me playing my lyre before bed?”
  133. >Before bed? But it’s not that late.
  134. >Wait, it is late, the sky is already dark with the moon like a farol
  135. >The town looks so whimsical
  136. >Every house has his own old-style lantern at the entrance and the street has their lanterns as well
  137. >All the little fillies and colts are entering to their houses at same time while some mares and colts are coming back home from work
  138. >Seeing the day to day of this people (well, horse people) is somehow relaxing
  139. >”Anom?” Bonbon tries to break your trance
  140. >You shake your head a bit
  141. “Yes, Bon?”
  142. >”Lyra is ready to play, she’s waiting for us” she informs you, you walk along with her to the living room and the cream mare and you sit on a big couch.
  143. >Between a fireplace with some pictures and the couch where both of you are sit, the mint unicorn is holding with her magic the instrument itself
  144. >She looks at Bonbon and you and calmly says “Are you ready for the show?”
  145. >The mare next to you nods “Go ahead”
  146. >Lyra closes her eyes and start playing the music
  147. >She’s using her hooves to play the strings, that requires a ton of dexterity
  148. >Sounds nice
  149. >For some reason something is warming your chest and your legs are loosened
  150. >Your ears are doing the same as well
  151. >This music is not nice
  152. >It’s godlike
  153. >Your eyes are about to water
  154. >Remember, tough guy
  155. >This is just excellent music
  156. >So excellent that takes you to your most heartwarming moments in your life
  157. >Like your first birthday with your friends and family in that party arranged for your parents in Trenque Lauquen
  158. >The moment you learnt to use the bike with two wheels
  159. >That new year’s eve when you kissed a girl in the mouth for first time
  160. >That’s it
  161. >Your eyelids can’t contain so many water
  162. >The tears come out like a damn torrent
  163. >Good bye tough guy
  164. >Bonbon turns at you “Are you ok?”
  165. >You nod, you don’t want to talk because your voice is gonna stutter like every time you get emotional
  166. >”Are you crying? D’awww, that music is touching you” Bonbon spots you
  167. >Touching you? It’s fucking blowing your mind with the feels
  168. “No… I got trash on every eye”
  169. >”Seriously” Bonbon cocks an eyebrow at you
  170. “Yes, I mean look at the size of every eye, a bird could hit with them!” and you avert your eyes bashfully to hide your manly tears
  171. >”Yeah, right” Bon scoffs at your failed attempt to look strong
  172. >After a while of whimsical music, a yawn comes from you and your falling on Morpheus’ arms is imminent
  173. >The gals contempt your fatigue and then they decide lead you, while you clumsily trot to your new room
  174. >Your room has a sober style with light yellow walls, a big bed, a light table, a bookshelf, a table and two seats. Also it has a window with a street view
  175. >The tiredness is killing any thought of explore with deepness your new habitation
  176. >Your new aunts are aware of your tiredness and Lyra decides to use her magic to put you on your bed with enough smoothness to not waking up while Bonbon is covering with blankets your small and fragile body
  177. >You’re too deadbeat to take account of this warm moment
  178. >Lights off
  180. >The floors is gray and with craters while the sky is starry. The gravity is almost inexistent
  181. >You know what it means
  182. >Surely it must be a dream with the blue princess, an elemental part of every new Equestria citizen story
  183. >To avoid getting bored you decide to jump until she began to lecture you and share her wisdom with you
  184. >Then a blue figure pops out at the horizon and you slow approach it
  185. “Mmm… Are you the Princess Luna?”
  186. >She doesn’t turn her face to you. Why is she ignoring you?
  187. >This is your dream, you deserve a little more respect
  188. >You clear your throat and you prepare a more dignified voice accent
  189. “Hey! Did you listen to me?”
  190. >The dreams jumper slowly turns her head to you
  191. >In a shamalanyan twist of events the face of that horse is not other than a crazier creature
  192. >The one who decided to take you to this marvelous realm is in front of you
  193. >Donald Duck
  194. >Just kidding
  195. >Discord
  196. >The confusion takes your mind
  197. “Discord, what’s happening? Why are we on the Moon”
  198. >"Ohhh my little Anom why do you look so worried?" The bizarre jokester plays with you
  199. "Sorry Woona, I wasn't expecting to see you so soon" you follow his game to see how long he keeps his act
  200. >A loud buzz makes you jump
  201. >The starry night sky begins to move and it's a giant sign with wheels carried for a Discord clone
  202. >In front of you there's another Draconequus who dresses like an old movie director with a megaphone and a camera "OK team, it's time for breakfast" and a lot of Discord copies go to a lunch table. The Discord director walks towards the real one and you. Discord takes out his Luna disguise and wears of his make up from his face. "Discord, you’re being too rigid, you need to be more authentic. You need to fly..." and the real Discord returns to his copy "I know, I just need to find my muse"
  203. >"I really hope you find it soon, the studios' guild is demanding us to have the film on billboards as soon as possible"
  204. >"It's not my fault that those blockheads don't understand the art of acting" protests Discord
  205. > Discord leaves the forum and then he sits on an actor chair with his name on it, next to another identical chair with your name. "Come on Pepe, take sit" Discord invites you to have a talk with you. You obey him and you reach your chair. Discord uses his powers to materialize two pairs of sunglasses on his and your face.
  206. >"Discord, although I love your funny antics and witness your powers, I can help but suspect that you didn't bring me here just for the shits and giggles. So let's go straight to the point because I'm quite tired"
  207. >Discord doesn't react to your request as he keeps drinking cola from a red plastic glass with a straw while making some slurping sounds.
  208. >You wait for Discord to finish his drink to talk with him, with no avail. Every time you say a word he interrupts you making more of those noises with his cola. And you know he loves to take every joke to the extreme, so a kid version of Discord comes to us with a tray with some plastic cups more, Discord takes one and follow making the same noises.
  209. >He surely was expecting your frustration at his behaviour, but you have a better idea. You jump to his lap to start to stretch yourself ala IWCRD style, then you walk in a little circle and finally you roll into a ball to sleep. Discord it’s a bit astonished at your not very normal demeanor “Pepe, what are you doing?”
  210. “I’m not Pepe, now I’m Pepeneko. Nyan~” and you stand in two legs to nuzzle his face.
  211. >He claps ironically. “Bravo Pepe, you’re so funny and random…” and he uses his talons to trigger the end of his magic illusion.
  212. >Now both of you are in his house, in the living room to be specific. It has a lot of weird shit, like shelves with crystal doors with a lot of bizarre stuff inside it, like a jar filled with parasprites turned to stone, a newspaper that doesn’t stop changing everything it has written on, a jelly typewriter and such.
  213. >Then you walk up to the window to see the pocket dimension where Discords live and boy, the show doesn’t make honor to what your eyes perceive. The horizon looks inexplicable infinite and there’s a bunch of island with every size and form possible and impossible.  Every one of them moves slowly floating in the air and there’s no floor or sky, just more of those islands and there’s a lot of light sources.
  214. >Telling what’s on every one of the islands in your view have would take more than a lifetime, but the ones that draw more your attention are one with wire trees and some robotic flies and another one with some seals dressed like lawyers disputing between each other. It would be cool explore this dimension and see more of this mumbo jumbo of reality.
  215. >”Come on, Pepe. We don’t have time to waste” Discord tries to turn your attention at him
  216. >You turn your face from the window
  217. “Discord, if I gonna help you with whatever you are want to do you could have given me a wish”
  218. >”A wish? I swear you are in the Union, don’t you? Well if you’re gonna be so hard to negotiate I have no choice but invoke a strikebreaker” and Discord uses his powers to materialize a green colt with a disheveled mane and a sombrero.
  219. >The little victim of the Discord’s whim looks confused to the sizes “Ay ay ay qué está pasando?” Discord smugly laughs “Great, nobody’s gonna notice the difference”
  220. “It’s not necessary my friend, my wish is rather simple” you inform
  221. >The green colt disappears as Discord snaps his talons and again you are alone with him in the room. “Ok, what do you want little rascal?”
  222. >You ponder and then you point at the window
  223. “I want you to help me explore your dimension”
  224. >He scoffs at you with a big laugh “Seriously? Come on Pepe, you couldn’t survive the wildness and chaos from my realm. Are you sure you don’t want something more according to you like…” he rubs his chin “I don’t know, some chocolate fountain or every Power Ponies comic?”
  225. >Reaffirming your will of adventure you clarify
  226. “No. I’m firm with my wish. I want to know what wonders your dimensions has and have some kind of unique adventure. And be with you sounds like a fun experience”
  227. >It’s not a lie, you always admired Discord. He was always a good guy with some crazy ideas but without many ponies comprehending his nature. You always wanted to be one of his friends and be in first place when he pulls some magic trick.
  228. >”Okay Pepe, but don’t come crying to me when a big and ugly monster tries to eat you” he keeps mocking at you
  229. “Ohhh, Discord. You don’t know me enough, you’ll see that I have some aces on my sleeves” and you pull a small piece of paper from behind of one of your forelegs. Discord doesn’t seem amused at your trick.
  230. >”Come on Pepe, now we have more serious business to do” and he materize a candle lit and pulls some invisible handle on the floor. A door opens in the middle of the living room and he goes in “Come here, you wanted some exciting adventure? Well, here I have something that would fulfill your wishes”
  231. ”OK, but I don’t care what you have down there, you still owe me the exploration trip” you insist as you go to the stairs where Discord is.
  232. >Discord doesn’t say a word and he and you keep going down. The stairs are going very deep down. You start to lose the patience and you start to run to reach the bottom more quickly.
  233. >”Pepe, I wouldn’t do that. You’re gonna stumble” warns you Discord
  234. “I’m not stupid, I can’t control my le--”
  235. >And you effectively stumble. You now are falling in every part of your body
  236. >Discord finds your accident funny and he doesn't hesitate to laugh “Look how good you are controlling your legs Pepe”
  237. >Finally  you reach the floor of the basement and after a while, Discord is here too
  238. >Some strange presence sends chills down your spine
  239. >You start to look at the sides to find what’s giving you that sensation
  240. >Two smalls blue points of lights in the horizont get closer along a flapping sound
  241. >A hizz is growing as well
  242. “Discord, what’s happening?”
  243. >There’s no answer but something or somebody is on your back
  244. >With fear of what you’re gonna see you turn your face back
  245. >A bughorse
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