Pheenoh meets hxc zelda girl

The day Pheenoh went back in time to get another chance with hxc Zelda Speedrunner

It was a beautiful day in Tennessee, and Pheenoh spent it all day inside playing OoT and writing fanfics about TP (Tyler Perry). Suddenly there was a knock on the door, there was a package left behind. Pheenoh unironically opened it like it was a chest in Zelda and lifted its contents above his head. It was the Master Swrod (tm)!!

Pheenoh was so excited that he took his weekly shower a bit early and changed into his favorite Pepsi shirt to take a picture and make everyone on ZSR forums jelly XD. "This may come in handy as foreshadowing" Pheenoh told his swrod.

Months later, Pheenoh went to an anime convention, cosplayed as Naruto. Back in the hotel room, he chilled with his sister and her fat friends. Shit was getting real as they were playing "Naruto Shippuden Force" but while naked. It's where you pretend to be Naruto characters and practice spin jumps by shaking the wiimote (and Pheenoh's wiimote was getting shaken up pretty meanly by Katie McMeano, his 9 year old sister).

All of a sudden, a hhott girl walked in the room and said "hey guys, i love zelda. like hxc fukkin obsessed with it and speed running. looking for oot 100% speed runners with a love for naruto and TP" then basically took her tits out and started masturbating.
Pheenoh thought to himself "damn, shes pretty cute. Unfortunately, I came here to have fun and drink, so forget this ho"

Pheenoh then proceeded to grab a cup of orange crush and play naruto shippuden with his 9 year old sister for the rest of the night.

The next day, Pheenoh heard from the staff guy (his penis) that he missed a perfect opportunity to get with the hhoottt girl. "Dog dammit! I would've totally been able to get her number and play oot with her!"

Then Pheenoh remembered his master sword. Because he takes it everywhere with him. "I'm going to go back in time! Equipped! Beta Quest here I come!" Pheenoh exclaimed, and travelled to the Temple of Time.

Pheenoh somehow found it, and travelled back to the past to get another chance.

"Nice, it worked! But damn, now my dick is way smaller!!!! XD jk but if she asks why I'll use that as my excuse" Pheenoh backwalked back to the anime convention. He wanted to equip his official Naruto ninja stars to impress the girl, but was unable to because he got inventory glitch.

Pheenoh made it back to his hotel room, just in time for the hott girl to arrive. She entered the room, said "hi guys, im a girl and i like to play games" then immediately got naked and sat on Pheenoh's lap, basically putting her tits in his face while touching his wiener.

Pheenoh said "youre pretty cute, but i want to actually have fun and drink" so he proceeded to play oot and drink orange crush.

The next day Pheenoh realized what he had done and said "shit" then the cycle repeated infinitely. But Pheenoh was not able to make it to the Temple of Time because first he would have to travel half the distance, then half that distance, then half of that forever, so Pheenoh gave up.
<Pheenoh> .8ball will i ever get laid?
there was no response, so he played oot on a possessed cart and died.

the end