Parasite_Steve

The Worst Story I Have Ever Written

Jan 15th, 2013
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  1. >Day ' >tfw never coming inside Rainbow Dash ' in Equestria...
  2. >Contrary to the day name, you have been pegging for Rarity since god-knows-when, oblivious to the fact that, well, who HASN'T dipped their fingers in that?
  3. >Seriously, Joe, Thunderlane, probably Blueblood...
  4. >To this day, you still claim that the night she walked in the Boutique with Thunderlane ended badly.
  5. >That cocksucker.
  6.  
  7. >One day, you were working at the hospital, cleaning up the windows.
  8. >You look at the clock, and see that your shift is done.
  9. >You make your way to the closet, and put your stuff away.
  10. >You head home to get out of your stupid-looking uniform.
  11. >You run into a certain mare on the way.
  12. "Oh. Applejack."
  13. >"Anon."
  14. >You nod to her, and she tips her hat in greeting.
  15. >The two of you are on pretty shaky ground, after you started off by egging her house.
  16. >Rarity made you apologize to her, which made you pretty damn suspicious, between that and all the implications on the show.
  17. >They haven't hung out too often, though.
  18. >...You're not a stalker, shut up.
  19.  
  20. >After changing out of your janitor suit and into more casual clothes, you walk outside.
  21. >At least, you try to, but you're blocked by...jesus fuck, how many stallions are out there?
  22. >They all look mad, bro.
  23. >"So, you're Anon."
  24. "That's my name."
  25. >They approach, and you back up.
  26. >These guys spell trouble.
  27. >"Alright, let's make this clear. You stay away from our little pony, y'hear?"
  28. "Wait, what?"
  29. >They all have a chuckle.
  30. >"Yeah, real funny. Now, do you get what we're saying?"
  31. "Are you seriously implying that Rarity is a..."
  32. >"Wait, you seriously don't know?"
  33. >You nod.
  34. >"She's our bitch and cum dumpster."
  35.  
  36. "But...what?"
  37. >"Y'see, even as an Element of Harmony, she did...things. Sexual things."
  38. >No...
  39. >"Yep, she was a whore, basically."
  40. "But..."
  41. >"Wasn't it obvious, kid? Element of Generosity?"
  42. >...Fuck.
  43. "Fine, I get it. I-I'll stay away from her."
  44. >"Good man. Hope we don't have to see you again.
  45.  
  46. >As soon as they leave and you close the door, you burst into tears.
  47. >You secretly had a bad feeling about it, but not like this.
  48. >You flop on the couch, crying your kidneys out like the little bitch you are.
  49. >You don't even hear the knock on the door over your sobs.
  50. >"Anon? Y'all there?"
  51. >You respond with further weeping.
  52. >The door slowly creaks open.
  53. >Someone trots up to you.
  54. >Out of the corner of your eye, you see...Applejack?
  55. >What the hell does she want, to just be a cunt in general as usual?
  56. >"Are you alright, sugarcube?"
  57. >Great. She's asking the obvious and using her pet names.
  58. "What the hell *sniff* do you think?"
  59. >She flinches a bit, before scowling.
  60. >"Well pardon me for askin'."
  61.  
  62. >She starts to trot off.
  63. "Hold it."
  64. >You sit up, wiping your eyes.
  65. "You came here for a reason. What was it?"
  66. >She turns around, still mad.
  67. >"I'm not in the mood to say."
  68. >She continues walking out.
  69. "...FUCK YOU, APPLEJACK!"
  70.  
  71. >You spend the rest of the day punching your walls out.
  72. >Your hand is likely broken, but you don't care.
  73. >You take a cold shower, and go to bed.
  74. >You dream of nothing, and wake up to FUCK YOUR HAND HURTS SO BAD.
  75. >You get up, hand smarting like all hell, and get dressed.
  76. >You can't button up your shirt due to your hurting hand, so you show skin.
  77. >Sadly you don't even lift.
  78. >You head outside to get your hand checked, because seriously, it HURTS.
  79.  
  80. >You walk out of the hospital room with a cast on your hand.
  81. >You keep walking, until you hear a familiar voice.
  82. >"Granny, you sure you're alright?"
  83. >Applejack?
  84. >You walk over to the room her voice came from.
  85. >Inside, you can see Granny Smith and Applejack, holding her hoof.
  86. >Oh yeah, you heard about the accident.
  87. >"I'm fine, dear...Just need to rest my eyes for a minute."
  88. >"Granny, wait, don't!"
  89. >Granny Smith closes her eyes, and the monitor soon flatlines.
  90. >You run off, calling for a doctor.
  91.  
  92. >Soon enough, you're back home, trying to read a book with one hand.
  93. >There's another knock on the door.
  94. >You open it, scowling.
  95. "Look, you pricks, I haven't even LOOKED at her since-"
  96. >"Huh?"
  97. >It's Applejack, instead of those stallions.
  98.  
  99.  
  100. "Can I help you?"
  101. >She sniffs before answering.
  102. >"Well, I just wanna thank you for calling a doctor."
  103. "Why?"
  104. >"I mean, she didn't make it and all, but I still appreciate it."
  105. "Even considering..."
  106. >"Well I haven't forgiven you for that. I don't even know why you were cryin' in the first place!"
  107. "It's a long story."
  108. >"I've got the time."
  109.  
  110. >"Wow, I knew you liked her and all, and she was sure jumping between stallions a lot, but...dang."
  111. "Heh, that was my reaction, to say the least."
  112. >She nods, before frowning more.
  113. >"Anon?"
  114. "Yeah?"
  115. >"...Never mind, sorry."
  116. >She walks off.
  117. >"I should go now."
  118. "Bye, then."
  119. >"See ya."
  120. >She walks out of the door without another word.
  121.  
  122. >Days pass.
  123. >After a while, she seems...happier.
  124. >This makes you happier, too, for some reason.
  125. >After thinking about it, you realize something.
  126. >Sure, you don't really like her that much, but you don't want to see her unhappy again.
  127. >In fact, she's started to grow on you, maybe.
  128.  
  129. >A week later, you knock on the door of her house.
  130. "Hello?"
  131. >The door opens, and you see Applejack, who looks rather...fancy.
  132. "Hey, Applejack. You look nice."
  133. >"Why thank you."
  134. >She smiles at your comment.
  135. "So, what made you decide to dress up?"
  136. >She freezes, before speaking.
  137. >"Well, Anon, you see..."
  138. >"Hey, AJ? You there?"
  139. >You see a somewhat familiar looking stallion. Caramel, you believe.
  140. >"Oh hey there."
  141. >She trots up to him, before...kissing him?
  142.  
  143. "Wait, what?!"
  144. >Despite your words, you figured it out.
  145. >She seemed happier because she hooked up with Caramel.
  146. >"You haven't heard, Anon?"
  147. "Well, I have now. Gratz."
  148. >You give a fake smile.
  149. >"You ready, AJ?"
  150. >"When you are."
  151. >The two of them walk out, before Caramel comes back.
  152. >"Anon, was it?"
  153. "That's me."
  154. >"Here's the thing. You harass my girl again, I'll make you my-"
  155. "Shut it. I've already had a group of stallions heckling me. I don't need another one on the list."
  156. >"You don't tell me what to do, you little shit."
  157. "Fuck this! You're not worth my time."
  158. >You snap at him before getting up and stomping off.
  159. >When you run into Applejack, you don't even look at her.
  160. >"Anon, you alright?"
  161. >You don't respond, and as soon as no one is watching you, you pull out the letter out of your pocket.
  162.  
  163. >Applejack,
  164. >I've never said anything that ended up well for anyone, so I'll just write this.
  165. >Can we put everything behind us?
  166.  
  167. >You ball up the paper, before throwing it away.
  168. >You run home, almost crying again.
  169. >As soon as you arrive, you slam the door behind you, and sit on the chair.
  170. >Goddamnit, why didn't you listen to him?
  171.  
  172. "Damn. Nice job."
  173. >"I know."
  174. >Big Macintosh just beat you at hoof-wrestling. Again. For the tenth time in a row.
  175. "I give. I dub thee strongest stallion alive."
  176. >"Nah, you're just weak."
  177. >The two of you laugh as you elbow him.
  178. >For some reason, despite the fact you couldn't stand Applejack, you and Big Mac got along pretty well.
  179. >"Say, Anon."
  180. "What's up?"
  181. >"You know, you really should give my sister a chance."
  182. "Huh?"
  183. >Where did THIS come from?
  184. >"We all know you hate her, but she just wants to know why."
  185. "Again, if I told you, you'd think I'm a stalker or a god."
  186. >"Well then tell me."
  187. "Not yet."
  188. >He sighs, shaking his head.
  189. >"You can be stubborn."
  190. "So I've been told."
  191. >"But the reason I ask, well..."
  192. >He looks around before leaning in to you.
  193. >"She cried herself to sleep one night, clinging to her pillow."
  194. "You're telling me this, why?"
  195. >"Because she was saying your name."
  196. "You mean not Anon?"
  197. >He nods.
  198. >You see, your real name was known to only a handful of ponies.
  199. "Well that's something."
  200. >"You should try to repair the damage."
  201.  
  202. >Of course you had to not believe him. OF COURSE.
  203. >You sit on the couch, sobbing more.
  204. >Why didn't you try to at least fix it...
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