(Title Card: Breath Of Fresh Squidward)

*Camera zooms in on Squid's house*

Squidward: "Another morning, another day of dealing wi-"

Spongebob and Patrick: "GOOD MORNING, SQUIDWARD!"

Squidward: "Speak of the devil... wait, why are you two here? And how'd you get into my house!?"

Spongebob: "Don't worry about it, Squidward! We've been doing this for a while now."

*Cut to a scrapbook with pictures of Squidward sleeping in odd and unusual position*

Squidward: "That's... really weird. Anyway, could you two idiots leave? I have to get ready for work!"

Patrick: "Don't worry, Squidward! Me and Spongebob took care of that for you..."

*Timecard labeled "Meanwhile"*

Mr Krabs: "Wait! COME BACK!"

*Camera cuts to a truck labeled "Free Money"*

Plankton: *Leans out the truck window* "That's right! Keep on "trucking" Krabs! Hahahahahaha! I crack myself up..."

Squidward: *Narrows eyes* "I don't even want to think about what you two did... Oh well. I suppose I should thank you two for giving me the day off. Breakfast, gentlemen?"

Spongebob and Patrick: "YES, PLEASE!"

*Camera cuts to Squid's kitchen*

Squidward: "Alright, you two. I'm going to make breakfast, so just follow one simple rule of mine... DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!"

*Cut to Spongebob and Patrick floating levitating*

Squidward: "Good."

*Squidward walks offscreen*

Patrick: "Spongebob! Look at that fancy toaster!"

Spongebob: "Patrick, didn't Squidward say to *imitating Squidward* 'NOT TOUCH ANYTHING!'?"

Patrick: "Yeah. But he never said we couldn't touch it with something else."

*Both have sneaky expressions on their faces*

Squidward: "Alright, breakfast is do- WAIT DON'T STICK THAT FORK IN THERE!"

*Patrick stumbles and the fork falls in the toaster*

All three, while being shocked: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

*All three fall to the ground, charred*

Squidward: "Ugh... wait. Hold on a second... I feel... SO COMPASSIONATE!"

*Camera cuts to storm clouds inside Squidward's head being replaced by the sun*

Spongebob and Patrick: "Will you stop talking about happiness, you nitwit?!"

*Cut to Spongebob and Patrick, who now have grouchy expressions*

Squidward: "Hey Spongebob! Do you wanna go jellyfishing, or go see a movie, or-"

Spongebob: "SHUT YOUR TRAP! I don't have time for your nonsense. I have a date with a little ukulele practice, so if you'll excuse me, I'll be on my way."

Squidward: *Expression changes to a slightly less happy one* "Alright then, see you later. Oh! How about you Patr-" *Patrick's rock slams shut*. "Point... taken. I'll guess I'll have to find someone else to have fun with."

*"Meanwhile" time card*

Spongebob: "A one, a two, a one-two-three-four(Title Card: Breath Of Fresh Squidward)

*Camera zooms in on Squid's house*

Squidward: "Another morning, another day of dealing wi-"

Spongebob and Patrick: "GOOD MORNING, SQUIDWARD!"

Squidward: "Speak of the devil... wait, why are you two here? And how'd you get into my house!?"

Spongebob: "Don't worry about it, Squidward! We've been doing this for a while now."

*Cut to a scrapbook with pictures of Squidward sleeping in odd and unusual position*

Squidward: "That's... really weird. Anyway, could you two idiots leave? I have to get ready for work!"

Patrick: "Don't worry, Squidward! Me and Spongebob took care of that for you..."

*Timecard labeled "Meanwhile"*

Mr Krabs: "Wait! COME BACK!"

*Camera cuts to a truck labeled "Free Money"*

Plankton: *Leans out the truck window* "That's right! Keep on "trucking" Krabs! Hahahahahaha! I crack myself up..."

Squidward: *Narrows eyes* "I don't even want to think about what you two did... Oh well. I suppose I should thank you two for giving me the day off. Breakfast, gentlemen?"

Spongebob and Patrick: "YES, PLEASE!"

*Camera cuts to Squid's kitchen*

Squidward: "Alright, you two. I'm going to make breakfast, so just follow one simple rule of mine... DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!"

*Cut to Spongebob and Patrick floating levitating*

Squidward: "Good."

*Squidward walks offscreen*

Patrick: "Spongebob! Look at that fancy toaster!"

Spongebob: "Patrick, didn't Squidward say to *imitating Squidward* 'NOT TOUCH ANYTHING!'?"

Patrick: "Yeah. But he never said we couldn't touch it with something else."

*Both have sneaky expressions on their faces*

Squidward: "Alright, breakfast is do- WAIT DON'T STICK THAT FORK IN THERE!"

*Patrick stumbles and the fork falls in the toaster*

All three, while being shocked: "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

*All three fall to the ground, charred*

Squidward: "Ugh... wait. Hold on a second... I feel... SO COMPASSIONATE!"

*Camera cuts to storm clouds inside Squidward's head being replaced by the sun*

Spongebob and Patrick: Will you stop talking about happiness, you nitwit?!

*Cut to Spongebob and Patrick, who now have grouchy expressions*

Squidward: Hey Spongebob! Do you wanna go jellyfishing, or go see a movie, or-

Spongebob: SHUT YOUR TRAP! I don't have time for your nonsense. I have a date with a little ukulele practice, so if you'll excuse me, I'll be on my way.

Squidward: *Expression changes to a slightly less happy one* Alright then. See you later... Oh! How about you Patr- *Patrick's rock slams shut*. Point... taken. I'll guess I'll have to find someone else to have fun with.

*"Meanwhile" time card*

Spongebob: A one, a two, a one-two-three-four: *Loud and poorly strung ukulele music echoes from Spongebob's house, spreading all across Bikini Bottom*.

Old Man Jenkins: Poor fella. Tuberculosis catches up with us all...

Gary: Bleugh. *Gary puts on headphones and retreats into his shell*.

Squidward: Could that be... yes! It is! A fellow instrument player! I gotta grab my clarinet! *Squid digs through his closets, accidentally pulling out Old Man Jenkins*

Old Man Jenkins: I'm sorry about the tuberculosis, sonny.

Old Man Jenkins: "Poor fella. Tuberculosis catches up with us all..."

Gary: Bleugh. *Gary puts on headphones and retreats into his shell*.

Squidward: Could that be... yes! It is! A fellow instrument player! I gotta grab my clarinet! *Squid digs through his closets, accidentally pulling out Old Man Jenkins*

Old Man Jenkins: I'm sorry about the tuberculosis, sonny.

Squidward: Nope. *tosses Old Man Jenkins through the window*.