Elm gets Rocmox ASL

Elminster shares his e-dating experience

Elminster was busy on his 4th readthrough of the mirc user's manual of the day when all of a sudden, he received a skype call from Rocmox. "Hey man, I need a date already. I wrote myself in a corner. What should I do?" Elminster, feeling the need to help with everyone's troubles to become one step closer to becoming a mod in his stream, decided to help Rocmox with his poorly described predicament.

To begin, Elminster need to scour the irc for potential female users. Elminster heard through sources that Venick409 had a sister that went on irc, that happened to be ugly and autistic, so she was in their league. He instructed Rocmox to pm ASL to ASL. ASL responded 14/f/cali so he was good to go.

"There's a lengthy process to nabbing a girl on the internet, so be sure to paste this into a .txt, but don't put it on pastebin, I'll refresh a google search to delete it if you do. What you want to do is say hi and just have her carry the whole conversation. When she stops talking, /whois her until you know she isnt idle and pm her 'hi' and repeat the process. When the time is right, tell her she is soooooooooooooooo lovely <3 and ask for her skype. At first this sounds ridiculous, but aspergers is actually a cyber sexually transmitted disease, with constant exposed contact to you she will be sure to lose her sense of reasoning." typed Elminster. After reading it over 5 times to make sure it was perfect, he sent this to Rocmox.

Things went swimmingly, Rocmox gained ASL's skype contact. Elminster asked Rocmox to log everything said as he is an avid reader of irc logs, for no other reason. This was Rocmox's moment, he was actually chatting with a girl with voice. "From the top to the bottom, bottom to top i stop. At the core I've forgotten." Elm pasted this to Rocmox, they were good Linkin Park lyrics for him to express his love.

"What were those words? Were they just words? I guess you don't mean them." said ASL to Rocmox, he was fucked. Luckily Elminster had the plan, he would pull out ComboKing strats and link to a video on YouTube to express his true feelings, so he instructed Rocmox to link ASL to a song by the glam metal band "Poison."

This broke the ice, ASL was ready to get naked on cam. Rocmox was sweating bullets, he needed Elminster's help. Elminster, feeling lonely, decided to sabotage Rocmox's attempts and take it for himself. Considering they both lived in Canada, Elm was able to walk to Rocmox's house. Elminster planned out this conversation for hours, so he was ready to play it out. WHen rocmox opened the door, Elm just crumbled and stood there awkwardly and they stared at each other for awhile. Then Elm ran past Rocmox and took his computer for this cybering moment.

Elm appeared on camera and ASL logged off.

the end