Diplomacy 7

>"Hold him down. Hold him down, dammit!"
>Be Twilight
>Be having a very, very, VERY bad day
>Oh, it HAD been going swimmingly for a good deal of it
>The humans had been answering your questions, and asking some of their own
>You had been chipping away at the wall of distrust that most had around themselves
>If the day would have been uneventful you might have even left on friendly terms with more than a few of them
>BUT THEN LORD AEGIS WAS SHOT!
>WITH A BUCKING CROSSBOW!
>RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!
>YOU BUCKING SAW IT!
>While you considered yourself a mare that didn't lose her composure when things when to horse apples, watching the lord of a kingdom you were trying to build diplomatic ties with get IMPALED by a chunk of wood caught you more than a little off guard
>You had freaked out
>Badly
>"Get those belts on his arms and legs. Hythia, if he breaks this chair hold onto him tight. I don't want him biting any of us."
>Standing beside you was Princess Celestia
>Just like you, the princess looked like she was doing everything in her power to keep herself composed
>She couldn't stand still, and there was a worry unlike any that you had ever seen on her face
>There was also anger
>Anger that somepony dare attack a guest of Canterlot Castle; and a stallion no less
>Anger that somepony was trying to ruin what you were all trying to build
>But the anger in her eyes was a drop of water in an ocean compared to lord Aegis
>"Cunting, pissing, pig-fucking, sodding CUNTS!"
>At that moment, the lord was sitting in a very large, sturdy looking chair
>All around him were his knights, every northerner that he had brought with him in fact
>They were watching him closely, some holding him against the chair as others used thick leather belts to tie his arms and legs down


>The crossbow bolt was still in the lord’s shoulder
>His wound was still leaking blood, continuing to soak his already blood-soaked tunic and pants
>The lord himself looked pale, a thin sheen of sweat coating his entire body
>You might not have been a doctor by any stretch of the imagination, but you didn't need to be one to tell that he had lost a lot of blood
>It was bad enough that somepony his age getting a wound like that, but running through the streets for nearly two hours trying to catch his attacker no doubt made his condition all the worse
>In fact, you were really surprised that he was still conscious
>Surprised and very, very scared; more for his wellbeing than anything
>Both you, Princess Celestia, and every doctor that you had on the staff had insisted that he get proper treatment, but the lord’s knights had refused
>As weak and pale and shaky as the lord looked, he was at his most dangerous now, you were told
>Apparently, if a northerner was exposed to enough physical trauma, they could go into a state of extreme aggression
>They'd become almost animalistic, so much so that they couldn't be reasoned with or stopped unless extreme force was used
>And while he looked as weak as you every seen him, there was a red tint to lord Aegis's eyes, and his teeth her drawn back into a snarl like some kind of angry bear
>He wasn't quite in a berserk state, but if they weren't careful he'd most certainly lose it
>The other northerners, being experts and dealing with these situations, were the ideal people handle their lord
>They SHOULD be able to keep him from losing it, as long as everything went well
>THEN you could come in and heal him
>So, powerless to help the aging stallion, all you could do was watch as the other northerners readied themselves , both you and Princess Celestia sick to your stomachs
>Standing beside you was a southerner knight that went by the name of Ser Thomas
>Standing beside him was young Anon


>While you didn't agree AT ALL with having such a young colt in the room, the other knights had insisted on it
>In fact, as you all stood there, Ser Thomas as giving the colt a lecture
>"Remember boy, if you ever see one of these big bastards with red eyes you stay still. When the northerners get like this they're like rabid wolves, the second something runs or moves they'll chase it, be it a rabbit or a man."
>"Yes, my lord," Anon said, watching as the northerners grabbed lord Aegis's arms,  legs, head, and shoulders
>”And if one of ‘em runs at you anyways climb up a tree. I’ve seen these bastards rip arms and legs off but I’ve never seen ‘em leg it up a pine or oak.”
“Yes, my lord.”
>Each of the stallions were large, strapping specimens, and most of them were younger than the lord by a great deal, but even so you could see them struggling
>Every time lord Aegis jerked an arm the northerner holding it would nearly lose his feet, and every time he tried to kick out the northerners holding his legs would have to hold on with all of their might
>The knight behind lord Aegis, who was holding a wooden club to knock the lord out if he lost it and broke free, readied himself
>"Damned pisshead... I'm going to go out there and find that blighted assassin and TEAR THEIR FUCKING HEAD OFF!" lord Aegis roared, thrashing in his seat. "Let me up lads! LET ME UP!"
>His knights ignored him, holding him all the tighter while two stood before one
>One, a stallion not much older than Anon, pulled out a knife
>Grabbing the steel tipped end of the bolt, he started cutting into it
>Lord Aegis hissed in pain, snarling at the stallion as the other northerner, who looked closer to the lord's age, roughly grabbed him by the face and forced him to look at him
>"Look at me, you cunt," the knight growled. "Look at me and keep your fucking senses.”
>Aegis bared his teeth, his eyes reddening
>Ser Thomas, as well as the other knights not helping in the procedure, took a step back
>"If you see those eyes go completely red, you stay right where you are, lad. These other big bastards should be able to keep our lord from killing all of us."
>Anon nodded, looking on as if he were utterly fascinated with what was happening


>"Yes lord."
>Ser Thomas looked over at you
>"That goes the same for you lasses. If our lord manages to get up just let us handle it."
>Princess Celestia opened her mouth to say something, but stopped at the last moment, instead nodding
>You nodded as well, trying your hardest not to look at all of the blood that was dripping down onto the floor
>The young northerner continued to cut into the wooden shaft of the crossbow bolt until he was almost all the way through
>He then slipped his knife back into his belt and grabbed the sharpened end
>Lord Aegis tried to look over to see what he was doing, only for the older knight to wrench his head back
>"Snap that end quick, boy. The rest of you hold onto the lord nice and tight."
>He slapped lord Aegis's cheek
>"And you. You keep your eyes on me, fucker. There's nothing you need to be worried about over there. Just look at me."
>Lord Aegis growled, his hands curling into fists
>Holding the shaft with one hand, the young knight yanked on the tip of the bolt
>A snap filled the air as it was broken off, which was immediately followed by a yell
>"MOTHER CUNT!"
>The older knight slapped lord Aegis again, harder this time, then again
>"Now pull the bolt out, boy. Be quick about it."
>You could feel yourself tensing as you closed your eyes
>You were going to be sick...
>The young knight reached out and grabbed the bolt shaft
>Without warning, he pulled it out of lord Aegis's shoulder
>"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!"
>Bellowing like a hydra, the lord thrashed and jerked as hard as he could
>"BLIGHTED, CUNTING, SODDING, FUCKING, BASTARDS!"


>The leather belts holding his arms and legs grew taunt
>The knights holding him held on for dear life, and the chair he was sitting on groaned in protest
>You simply tensed, pressing yourself against Princess Celestia, who was quick to wrap a protective wing around you
>Pleasebeokaypleasebeokaypleasebeokaypleasebeokay...
>After nearly an agonizing minute of screaming, yelling, and thrashing, lord Aegis slumped into his chair
>The redness had left his eyes, as had the fierceness and rage
>He just looked like a tired, old, sweaty, pale, panting stallion
>With a sigh, the older knight took a step back
>"He's alright at the moment, lads," he said. "You can let him go."
>The knights holding lord Aegis quickly released him, standing up
>As they did that, Princess Celestia took a step forward
>The tip of her horn glowed, and with a spell she sealed the gaping wound in the old lord’s shoulder
>Lord Aegis didn't seem to notice this, however, his eyes closed as he tried to catch his breath
>"There you go, my lord," the older knight said, giving lord Aegis a pat on the shoulder. "You're all fixed up. Now you just need a bit o' food and drink in you and you'll be as right as--"
>"Minotaurs," lord Aegis interrupted. "It was... the fucking minotaurs."
>The knights looked at each other
>"My lord?"
>Slowly, lord Aegis lifted his head and opened his eyes
>They were half-lidded and hazy you noticed, no doubt the result of all the blood that he lost
>"That damned... Taur empress tried to kill me... to avenge her damn... mother," he growled


>"It was not, my lord," the older knight said. "That's a gryphon bolt if I've ever seen it, though I'd bet my sword the thing was fired from a pony crossbow, since the thing barely went through you."
>Lord Aegis didn't seem to hear him, staring at nothing
>"I'm going to... find that fucking... assassin," he said, attempting to rise out of his seat, only for his restraints to stop him. "I'll find them... and tear their god damned arms off. And... and then I'm going to..."
>Ser Thomas leaned over toward you and Princess Celestia
>"This is nothing to worry about, your highnesses," he said. "My lord’s just a bit woozy from the blood loss is all. Made him a bit senseless as it were. He'll be as right as rain in a day or two."
>Gathering up your courage, you managed to pick your head up and look at the lord Aegis
>Though the old stallion looked a little worse for wear, at least he didn't have a crossbow bolt in him anymore
>And now that he did you and the other princesses could do everything in your power to make sure that he fully recovered, as well as find his would-be assassin
>At the moment, you had nearly every guard in the city combing the streets
>There would be nowhere for the criminal to go
>You'd find her and she'd face justice
>You'd make sure of it...
>"Ser, if there's anything that you need, anything at all, don't hesitate to ask," Princess Celestia said, bowing her head. "We'll do everything in our power to get it for you."
>The knight inclined his head as lord Aegis continued to mumble threats and curses
>"We will, your highness."
>"And, if its alright with you, I'd like to have a few ponies come in and check up on your lord, as well as have a few guards posted outside your doors. Whoever this assassin is they may have friends."
>Though Ser Thomas looked a bit hesitant at that, he nodded all the same
>"That's fine, your highness, but you may want to wait an hour or so until my lord gets his sense back. We don't want him getting excited."


>There was a knock on the door
>Everypony in the room tensed, the knights reaching for their blades
>"Your highness, it's me, Raven," a pony called from the other side of the door
>A sigh of relief escaped you
>It was just the princess's assistant...
>Thank goodness...
>You could see Celestia relax somewhat as well
>"Did something happen, Raven?" she asked. "Did they find our would-be assassin?"
>"Not yet, your grace," Raven replied, a bit of nervousness creeping into her voice. "An unexpected guest has made her way into the castle, and I thought it wise to come and immediately tell you."
>Guest?
>You didn't remember anypony other than lord Aegis and his knights being scheduled to visit...
>From the look on Princess Celestia's face, you could tell that she was thinking the same thing
>Still though, she kept her composure
>"And who would our uninvited guest be, if I may ask?"
>There was a pause on the other side of the door
>"Well... it's the minotaur empress."
>You tensed
>Princess Celestia tensed
>The knights all around you tensed
>Oh no...
>Lord Aegis slowly lifted his head
>The exhaustion had left his face, and he seemed to grow three sizes in his chair
>His eyes had not only regained focus, but their red tint as well
>"Empress?" he growled.
>He pushed against his restraints
>The leather belts grew taunt
>With a yank, the belt holding his left arm snapped


>The lord's eyes narrowed and he bared his teeth as you all stood there, frozen
>"That cow's dead."

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~

>Be Helga
>First of her name, ruler of Labyrinthia, and rock of the empire
>"Please, your grace, if you would just follow me back--"
>You looked down at the stallion desperately trotting after you and your bodyguard
>He was okay looking, for a pony at least
>If you weren't a heifer on a mission you might have taken a moment or two to flirt with him
>But not today
>You had someone to meet
>Someone who had somehow managed to enter your lands with a hundred knights right under your snout
>He was the bane of the taurs
>The one that slew your mother with a swing of his club
>The lord-commander of a very powerful order of knights
>Lord Aegis
>Also known as the coolest bull this side of anywhere
>For most of your life you had been trying to meet this big human
>Time and again you had asked Drfual to send your regards, invitations, chocolates, anything you could think of
>But no matter what you did, the old bull snuffed you
>Not that you could blame him
>He was probably busy being the coolest sonovabitch in the whole world, so he didn't have time for a little ol' taur like you
>But you just wanted to sit down and talk with him ONCE
>You wanted to meet the bull that managed to not only best ol' mom in battle, but half of the old taur nobility with nothing but an old club
"Don't you worry your pretty little head, cutiepie. There's no need to give us any fanfare," you said, giving the colt a quick pat on the head.


>"I-It's not that, your grace," the stallion said, running a hoof through his now mussy mane. "There's been a incident, and the castle is on lo--"
"It'll be fine," you interrupted with a dismissive wave of the hand. "Just let me talk to Celestia and I'm sure I can smooth everything over."
>Sure, ol' sunbutt may be a bit grumpy that you just up and showed up without a word of warning, but you were sure she'd be fine with you staying for a day or two
>You'd even give her a better deal on a trade agreement or two to keep her grumbling
>And then you'd get to meet him
>You'd get to see him in the flesh, in all of his glory
>Ohhhhh!
>Youweresoexcited!
>You nearly skipped down the hallway, a great big smile on your face
>While you had no idea where the heck Celestia would be in this castle of hers, you were positive that she'd appear at any moment
>You looked over at your advisor
"Do you have that triple chocolate cake ready, Helena?"
>"Yes ma'am," the taur answered, showing you the absolutely MASSIVE cake in her hands
"Good," you said with a nod. "That should put a smile on the princess's face when she sees us."
>The stallion following you let out a frustrated squeak
>"Your highness, I simply MUST insist that you come with me," he said with a stomp of his widdle hoof. "The princess is busy at the moment and she can't--"
>"MINOTAUR!"
>You and your bodyguard jumped
>Looking down the hallway, you saw someone making their way toward you
>It was a giant of a human, an old northerner by the look of him, his left side covered in blood
>While seeing ANYONE covered in blood might have given you pause, or at least made you concerned about an injured male, you barely noticed it, instead looking into the human's face
>Was...



>Was that him?!
>You thought of all of the descriptions that you had collected of lord Aegis over the years
>Giant of a human... aging... with a small scar under his left eye...
>...
>You think it was him...
>A low, excited sound escaped you
>Ohmygosh!
>It was him!
>It was him and he was COMING RIGHT TOWARDS YOU!
>You stopped in the middle of the hallway, your eyes wide
>"MINOTAUR!" the lord roared again, his hands curling into fists
>You could hear your heart pounding in your chest
>You could feel your knees getting weak, and a wave of nausea swept through you, but you did your best to ignore it
>Alright girl...
>Don't screw this up...
>First impressions are everything..
>You had been waiting for this moment since you were a teenager….
>You needed to show this bull you were a big, strong, super cool heifer
>You looked down at your tits, making sure to smoosh them between your arms
>Good, good...
>An old bull like him probably didn't care about big old boobs anymore, but it'd really be nice if he snuck a peek at your rack
>Not for long...
>Just a second or two would be REALLY nice...
>Running a hand through your hair and straightening your tunic, you cleared your throat, smiled, and stood to your full height
"Hello there, sir, my name is Empress Helga Hienifer, ruler of Labr--urk!"
>Somehow, the human managed to close the distance between the two of you without you noticing
>Slipping between your guards, he let out an animalistic growl, and before you could so much as spit, grabbed you by the throat
>"FUCKING TAURS!" he snapped lifting you bodily into the air
>OhsweetCelestiaabove!


>The coolest bull in the world was TOUCHING YOU!
>His hands were so ROUGH!
>And he was STRONG!
>Thiswassofuckingcool!
>...
>Wait...
>He was strangling you...
"Urkshksl!"
>You kicked and struggled as your bodyguards and advisor let out a shout
>Some of tried to reach out and grab the bull, but were beaten back with fist, foot, and teeth
>As he did this, he shook you back and forth like some sort of rag doll, roaring like an angry dragon
>Down the hall, you could see a very panicked Princess Celestia racing toward you
>Behind her was her old student, along with about fifty knights, who looked just as freaked out as the white alicorn did
>"Lord Aegis!"
>"My lord!"
>"Put her down!"
>Your eyes widened as the giant human's grip on your neck tightened
>You weren't a weak taur by any means, and just like your mom you had a pretty thick, muscled neck
>It was this thick neck that was probably keeping your windpipe from being crushed
>As you struggled, kicking and gurgling and trying to wrench yourself out of the human's iron grip, you wondered if maybe it would have been a better idea to send a letter first
>...
>Nah...
>This was AWESOME...