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| 1 | so let me tell you about this time i saved a girl friend's life | |
| 2 | i hope | |
| 3 | ||
| 4 | she showed up at my door one night screaming | |
| 5 | ||
| 6 | she lived downstairs in the house I was living in with Charity at the time | |
| 7 | or maybe Charity was visiting after we had broken up | |
| 8 | or | |
| 9 | whatever | |
| 10 | ||
| 11 | we, charity and I, were hanging out watching a movie | |
| 12 | and then we heard screaming | |
| 13 | ||
| 14 | no, i think earlier | |
| 15 | this girl | |
| 16 | a friend of charities that I knew | |
| 17 | that lived downstairs | |
| 18 | with her boyfriend | |
| 19 | invited us down to party, or just hang out | |
| 20 | ||
| 21 | "there's a big bag of mushrooms" | |
| 22 | ||
| 23 | i think her boy was a dealer, but whatever | |
| 24 | we didn't feel like it | |
| 25 | and besides i don't like mushrooms that much anyways | |
| 26 | ||
| 27 | so charity and i were hanging out | |
| 28 | and | |
| 29 | screaming | |
| 30 | ||
| 31 | "i'm dying" | |
| 32 | "i'm dying" | |
| 33 | ||
| 34 | "i'm dying" | |
| 35 | ||
| 36 | knowing she was probably high and might be freaking out | |
| 37 | i didn't really panic | |
| 38 | because i've dealt with people | |
| 39 | having bad trips before | |
| 40 | ||
| 41 | mostly strangers | |
| 42 | so i opened the door | |
| 43 | ||
| 44 | and she was standing there | |
| 45 | ||
| 46 | ||
| 47 | ||
| 48 | ||
| 49 | and her arm had been cut open almost elbow to wrist | |
| 50 | with a razor | |
| 51 | she had taken apart | |
| 52 | ||
| 53 | when she was along in her apartment | |
| 54 | after taking | |
| 55 | probably | |
| 56 | a huge amount of mushrooms | |
| 57 | by | |
| 58 | herself | |
| 59 | ||
| 60 | but i don't know how much she took | |
| 61 | i just assumed | |
| 62 | because at that momemtn | |
| 63 | ||
| 64 | IDIDN"TFUCKINGCARE | |
| 65 | ||
| 66 | and she was bleeding | |
| 67 | alot | |
| 68 | and the cut | |
| 69 | was | |
| 70 | deep | |
| 71 | ||
| 72 | very deep | |
| 73 | i could tell i've been cut before | |
| 74 | and i'm no doctor | |
| 75 | but i could tell | |
| 76 | ||
| 77 | it was really bad | |
| 78 | ||
| 79 | so i did what little i knew how to do | |
| 80 | ||
| 81 | i learned this once | |
| 82 | when i was working in a restaurant | |
| 83 | ||
| 84 | ||
| 85 | i used to get bored | |
| 86 | and the hobby we had | |
| 87 | was to sharpen the knives | |
| 88 | because | |
| 89 | you were bored | |
| 90 | and anybody that handles a knife knows a dull knife | |
| 91 | ||
| 92 | is way more dangerous than a sharp knife | |
| 93 | when you know how to use a | |
| 94 | knife | |
| 95 | because | |
| 96 | a dull knife | |
| 97 | you have to use a lot of force to cut and when you do that | |
| 98 | and you | |
| 99 | ||
| 100 | slip | |
| 101 | ||
| 102 | you can cut right through your fucking | |
| 103 | whatever | |
| 104 | by mistake | |
| 105 | ||
| 106 | and that totally sucks | |
| 107 | ||
| 108 | fully | |
| 109 | ||
| 110 | especially when you cut off the ennd of your thumb | |
| 111 | right before lunchtime rush | |
| 112 | in a sandwhich shop | |
| 113 | ||
| 114 | and you still have to make fucking sandwiches | |
| 115 | with a fucking glove | |
| 116 | and your fucking finger wrapped in | |
| 117 | ||
| 118 | papertowles | |
| 119 | ||
| 120 | and youre making these sandwiches | |
| 121 | for all these | |
| 122 | lady government employees on lunch break | |
| 123 | ||
| 124 | and you're like | |
| 125 | ||
| 126 | bleeding | |
| 127 | ||
| 128 | and kinda like | |
| 129 | ||
| 130 | SORRY I"M BLEEDING | |
| 131 | ||
| 132 | while you make their sandwiches | |
| 133 | but you had to | |
| 134 | ||
| 135 | because | |
| 136 | ||
| 137 | what was the owner going to do while he worked with me | |
| 138 | or the manager or whatever the guy that I worked with that said | |
| 139 | ||
| 140 | "yeah, I wanted to be a rockstar one day too..." | |
| 141 | ||
| 142 | all by himself during a lunch rush | |
| 143 | ||
| 144 | he cut the end of his finger off once too | |
| 145 | REAL BAD LIKE | |
| 146 | a and had to save the end | |
| 147 | and get it sewn back on | |
| 148 | ||
| 149 | anyways! | |
| 150 | ||
| 151 | so i was working in the pizza shop | |
| 152 | with a real sharp knife | |
| 153 | ||
| 154 | and we always cleaned the knives | |
| 155 | because | |
| 156 | ||
| 157 | they | |
| 158 | woud | |
| 159 | get | |
| 160 | dirty | |
| 161 | ||
| 162 | and that's no good when you're working with food. | |
| 163 | ||
| 164 | so i cleaned the knived regularly | |
| 165 | with a wet cloth | |
| 166 | and | |
| 167 | then | |
| 168 | one day | |
| 169 | ||
| 170 | i cleaned the knife facing the wrong way | |
| 171 | and sliced the meat part of my palm open | |
| 172 | with the blade | |
| 173 | and went | |
| 174 | ||
| 175 | OW | |
| 176 | ||
| 177 | and dropped the knife | |
| 178 | and | |
| 179 | PUSHED THAT FUCKER TOGETHER REAL GOOD | |
| 180 | ||
| 181 | and held it there | |
| 182 | and it wasn't busy | |
| 183 | so i could | |
| 184 | ||
| 185 | take care of my own personal medical needs at work while I was alone working | |
| 186 | ||
| 187 | so i pressed that together and held it | |
| 188 | and eventually | |
| 189 | i bandaged it | |
| 190 | and it stuck | |
| 191 | ||
| 192 | and then it healed | |
| 193 | ||
| 194 | and | |
| 195 | NO SKARS | |
| 196 | ||
| 197 | it was kinda neat. worked real good and I was suprizd, because it was a pretty | |
| 198 | clean deep cut, or it seemed deep | |
| 199 | ||
| 200 | at the time. | |
| 201 | ||
| 202 | ||
| 203 | so back to my bleeding friend on mushrooms that has just sliced her arm open | |
| 204 | ||
| 205 | ||
| 206 | so i was like | |
| 207 | ||
| 208 | looking | |
| 209 | ||
| 210 | a bit suprized to see | |
| 211 | ||
| 212 | her arm sliced open | |
| 213 | ||
| 214 | and i just kinda | |
| 215 | ||
| 216 | not in any sort of funny way at all | |
| 217 | ||
| 218 | "stand back" | |
| 219 | ||
| 220 | and she was screaming | |
| 221 | and charity | |
| 222 | i don't thik | |
| 223 | really knew what to do | |
| 224 | ||
| 225 | this apartment | |
| 226 | was a room | |
| 227 | and the bathroom | |
| 228 | was right beside the door | |
| 229 | to my room | |
| 230 | our room | |
| 231 | charity and i | |
| 232 | ||
| 233 | it had a little kitchen | |
| 234 | ||
| 235 | and i went qyuickly | |
| 236 | and got a towel | |
| 237 | the first thing i could see | |
| 238 | that i could use | |
| 239 | to both | |
| 240 | collect the blood | |
| 241 | and | |
| 242 | ||
| 243 | ||
| 244 | so i took the towel and | |
| 245 | kinda gently | |
| 246 | ||
| 247 | because she was totally freaking out | |
| 248 | ||
| 249 | pressed the cut together | |
| 250 | and held it | |
| 251 | ||
| 252 | the easy part was over | |
| 253 | ||
| 254 | because | |
| 255 | she was still | |
| 256 | completely freaking out | |
| 257 | ||
| 258 | "i'm dying" | |
| 259 | ||
| 260 | "i'm going to die" | |
| 261 | ||
| 262 | "..." | |
| 263 | ||
| 264 | "no, you're not going to die" | |
| 265 | ||
| 266 | "yes! I 'm dyng." | |
| 267 | ||
| 268 | "no." | |
| 269 | and i just tried my best to calm her down | |
| 270 | and i think i took her | |
| 271 | into the bathroom | |
| 272 | ||
| 273 | to keep the blood from staining the carpet | |
| 274 | it wasn't my house | |
| 275 | ||
| 276 | and we sat on the edge of the bathtub | |
| 277 | and i just | |
| 278 | tried to keep her calm | |
| 279 | ||
| 280 | while charity called the ambulance | |
| 281 | ||
| 282 | ... | |
| 283 | ||
| 284 | ||
| 285 | i think | |
| 286 | 7 cops showed up | |
| 287 | before the ambulance | |
| 288 | ||
| 289 | or something | |
| 290 | my memory might be fading about that part | |
| 291 | ||
| 292 | and they questioned me | |
| 293 | and i told them | |
| 294 | the truth | |
| 295 | ||
| 296 | about what happened | |
| 297 | ||
| 298 | but | |
| 299 | i kinda got this feeling | |
| 300 | like | |
| 301 | ||
| 302 | theythoughtiwaslying | |
| 303 | ||
| 304 | that i | |
| 305 | had given her the drugs | |
| 306 | ||
| 307 | that | |
| 308 | somehow | |
| 309 | ||
| 310 | what had happend | |
| 311 | ||
| 312 | was my fault | |
| 313 | ||
| 314 | when in fact | |
| 315 | ||
| 316 | charity and i | |
| 317 | were upstairs | |
| 318 | watching a movie | |
| 319 | when | |
| 320 | our | |
| 321 | friend | |
| 322 | came | |
| 323 | up | |
| 324 | bleeding | |
| 325 | and | |
| 326 | screaming | |
| 327 | ||
| 328 | finally | |
| 329 | eventually | |
| 330 | the ambulance showed up | |
| 331 | ||
| 332 | and the took her away | |
| 333 | ||
| 334 | and she got | |
| 335 | lots of stitches | |
| 336 | ||
| 337 | and i think | |
| 338 | some nerve damage | |
| 339 | ||
| 340 | i remember seeing her after | |
| 341 | ||
| 342 | a while after | |
| 343 | and she had | |
| 344 | * INS one-of-the-time | |
| 345 | and she had | |
| 346 | a bandage around her arm | |
| 347 | ||
| 348 | i think she's ok | |
| 349 | ||
| 350 | or at least | |
| 351 | ||
| 352 | i know she didn't die | |
| 353 | ||
| 354 | beacuse i saw her again | |
| 355 | and she was | |
| 356 | totally alive | |
| 357 | ||
| 358 | i can tell | |
| 359 | ||
| 360 | i think she thanked me | |
| 361 | and i was like | |
| 362 | ||
| 363 | no problem | |
| 364 | ||
| 365 | but not super cool | |
| 366 | just kinda | |
| 367 | hoping | |
| 368 | ||
| 369 | she was ok | |
| 370 | and she didn't | |
| 371 | ever | |
| 372 | do that again | |
| 373 | ||
| 374 | ||
| 375 | one time | |
| 376 | she came up | |
| 377 | to see me before | |
| 378 | this happened | |
| 379 | ||
| 380 | she was kinda drunk | |
| 381 | and in a skirt | |
| 382 | and | |
| 383 | ||
| 384 | i think we just kinda hung out | |
| 385 | and | |
| 386 | i gave her some water | |
| 387 | because when you're drunk and you just got home | |
| 388 | the best way to get rid of | |
| 389 | or to not get a hangover | |
| 390 | is to drink a whole bunch of water | |
| 391 | ||
| 392 | i learned that | |
| 393 | when i was drinking all the time | |
| 394 | asprin works good in the morning | |
| 395 | ||
| 396 | she came up | |
| 397 | to see me before | |
| 398 | this happened | |
| 399 | ||
| 400 | she was kinda drunk | |
| 401 | and in a skirt | |
| 402 | and | |
| 403 | ||
| 404 | i think we just kinda hung out | |
| 405 | and | |
| 406 | i gave her some water | |
| 407 | ||
| 408 | because when you're drunk and you just got home | |
| 409 | the best way to get rid of | |
| 410 | or to not get a hangover | |
| 411 | is to drink a whole bunch of water | |
| 412 | ||
| 413 | i learned that | |
| 414 | when i was drinking | |
| 415 | all the time | |
| 416 | ||
| 417 | asprin works good in the morning | |
| 418 | ||
| 419 | but really | |
| 420 | the best is | |
| 421 | ||
| 422 | not to drink too much | |
| 423 | so you don't get a hangover | |
| 424 | ||
| 425 | easy | |
| 426 | ||
| 427 | just not that easy for me | |
| 428 | ||
| 429 | some people have problems with that so it's best to encourage them | |
| 430 | ||
| 431 | nottofuckingdrinkandbesupportiveandhelpthem | |
| 432 | # charity was really good at that "you're so hot when you hold that glass of water..." i just, succumbed to peer pressure beacause of the dirty looks I would get from the bartenders because, I guess, I wasn't tipping enough for my glasses of fucking water or something. | |
| 433 | ||
| 434 | but whatever | |
| 435 | ||
| 436 | so yeah, | |
| 437 | i didn't really need first aid for that | |
| 438 | i just kinda knew from experience | |
| 439 | ||
| 440 | what to do when my friend | |
| 441 | shows up at my door | |
| 442 | with a | |
| 443 | ||
| 444 | lacerated arm and artery | |
| 445 | at night | |
| 446 | ||
| 447 | ||
| 448 | i don’t remember her name |