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 C.R.I.M.E. Members
 Dr. Gunface- Swiss Scientist who was working on nanomachines that duplicate objects, used them to manufacture guns for arms dealing. One day a deal went south, and he was left for dead by the mob. Used the nanomachines to save himself. Now he is half-gun. His evil schemes involve heisting exotic weaponry to disassemble and copy, like freeze rays and shit.
 
 The Fifth Column- a master of disguise who can duplicate himself. A one-man terrorist oragnization who works for the highest bidder
 
 Doctor Destruction- an old man in power armor who has been operating since the 50's and rants about how YOU YOUNGUN'S THESE DAYS HAVE NO RESPECT WHY BACK IN MY DAY while he's doing crime. Founding member.
 
 Dino-Czar- time traveling dinosaur wizard. Originally wanted to ensure dinosaurs would survive extinction, then he found out about birds.
 
 The Cliche- Performance criminal who enjoys "a classic touch." Holds the mayor's daughter ransom by tying her to the train tracks in order to get the deed to City Hall.
 
 Red Menace- A Russian super soldier. Super strong, but has brain damage as a side effect of the serum.
 
-Snowflame- Yes.
+Professor Primate- a Nazi neurosurgeon who found out he had stomach cancer after working with radioactive material as part of the super soldier program. Rather than take it sitting down, he stole a gorilla's corpse and transplanted his brain into it.
 
 
 Unaffiliated:
 Panzermensch- Nazi welded into his power armor during D-Day, life support has perfectly preserved his body, but his brain has degraded. Still thinks he's fighting at Normandy and the heroes are allied forces
 
-Pirouette and Arabesque, superpowered ballerinas who turned to mercenary when the theatre they worked for closed down. Pirouette has the power to spin at supersonic speeds, metal-tipped ballet shoes, and a razor tutu. Arabesque is incredibly strong and durable, looks like Zangeif. Both jump super high and have uncanny grace
+Pirouette and Arabesque, superpowered ballerinas who turned to mercenary when the theatre they worked for closed down. Pirouette has the power to spin at supersonic speeds, metal-tipped ballet shoes, and a razor tutu. Arabesque is incredibly strong and durable, looks like Zangeif. Both jump super high and have uncanny grace.
 
-MAX- you know him, you love him, the indestructible robot designed by a schizophrenic mad scientist
+MAX- MAX was created during the Cold War by an insane scientist. Not "They stood there and mocked me! THE WHOLE WORLD MOCKED ME!" insane. "Ants live in my skin, government microchips in my cornflakes" insane. Though his assertions on the coming apocalypse seemed to change by the hour ("The shapeshifting reptilian aliens in the houses of power will rise up and bombard the earth with radiation!" "Communist ghosts will possess our machines!" "An army of Wizard Hitler Clones will march against us!"), he was certain the world would be ending very soon. To this end, he created MAX. MAX thought at an unmatched speed of 2.5 Megabytes per second. MAX was named because he was, at the time, the absolute maximum of technology. Granted, that was in 1957. He was built to survive any of the delusional scientist's theoretical apocalypses. Of course, the apocalypse never happened, he's convinced any technology built after 1963 is actually a communist or alien war machine, and he speaks in a voice that makes Microsoft Sam sound articulate.
 
-Cartog the Surveyor, Interplanetary Exterminator- hired by a pre-human civ to take care
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-of their ape problem using his magic space alium terraforming technology. He's a bit late but professional obligation demands he go through with it because they paid in advance.
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 The Time Cops. A monastic sect dedicated to making sure history doesn't get fucked up. Led by Orrin Vex, who's like timecop Sinestro. They have guns that turn people back into zygotes because TIME.