Time Wars: Last Forever
By Literally No One You’ve Heard Of

Prepare to have your brain scrambled like an egg in a tumble dryer. Time Wars: Last Forever is the epic, nonsensical, and unnecessarily long 38-part sci-fi fantasy action-romcom-drama-horror-history-adventure series that nobody asked for—but everyone will pretend they’ve read.

The multiverse is collapsing, time is unraveling, and somewhere in the chaos, a sentient potato named Spudrick Timebeard must lead a ragtag army of time-displaced weirdos—including a disco samurai, a caffeine-powered librarian, and a velociraptor with a law degree—on a mission to save Tuesday afternoon.

In a universe where past, present, and future are all happening simultaneously and also next Thursday, heroes will rise, fall, and be mildly inconvenienced by unexpected time taxes.

Warring factions like the Chrono-Karens, The Gregorian Cult, and the Quantum Spaghetti Syndicate clash in battle across timelines for reasons even they forgot. Meanwhile, a mysterious villain only known as Greg threatens to rewrite all of history just to make 1993 the only year that exists. Forever.

Also, let’s be clear:
Transformers can fuck off.
We don’t need giant robots turning into trucks. We have sentient hourglasses that turn into tax accountants and then back into nightmares.

If you like explosions, paradoxes, conversations with your own past life therapist, and the concept of a time-traveling goose with a grudge, Time Wars: Last Forever is the only book series that will melt your brain in all the best ways.

Coming soon to a library near you, and then leaving immediately because it was never actually there.