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- >be with a group of friends at a bar one night
- >watching the game together
- >there’s a new guy at the bar
- >chris, the bartender, says he’s the new janitor
- >but he does a lot more than mop floors
- >this fat, short, smelly guy goes table to table, making sure everyone is talking about sports and only sports
- >kinda sucks the fun out of the whole place but we try to ignore him
- >watch the game, have fun
- >game is over, talk about our favorite plays and other stuff
- >eventually the conversation drifts more towards general shit like life
- >the janitor comes waddling over, hot pocket in his hand
- >what do you think you’re doing?
- >uhh, just talking about shit, I don’t believe this is any of your-
- >ARE YOU AWARE THAT THIS IS A SPORTS BAR MEANT FOR SPORTS DISCUSSION ONLY
- >dude the game is over, I don’t think it’s that bad if we talk-
- >NO, he says, lips smacking, THIS IS A SPORTS BAR AND YOU WILL DISCUSS ONLY SPORTS HERE
- >dude, you’re spraying hot pockets in my face, please move-
- >YOU CANNOT BAD MOUTH A MEMBER OF THE STAFF LIKE THAT
- >the only one with a bad mouth here is you
- >I WILL HAVE YOU REMOVED
- >fuck off, you can’t make is do shit
- >this guy starts fuming because we’re right. He doesn’t even have any real power
- >he has to call the bouncer to remove us
- >see him stuffing down another hot pocket as we leave
- >the bouncer tells us we’ve been banned from the establishment for 72 hours
- >demand to see the owner
- >he says we can’t because we’ve been banned for 72 hours or less
- >what kind of fucking bullshit is that
- >ask them how much they pay that bozo janitor
- >nothing, he does it for free
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