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- | | __ __| | ________\ \/ / _____ _____ ______
- | | | | \ | \___ / \ / / \\__ \ / ___/
- | |___| | / |__/ / / \| Y Y \/ __ \_\___ \
- |_______ \____/|____/_____ \/___/\ \__|_| (____ /____ >
- \/ \/ \_/ \/ \/ \/
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- _/ __ \ / __ | | \ __\ |/ _ \ / \
- \ ___// /_/ | | || | | ( <_> ) | \
- \___ >____ | |__||__| |__|\____/|___| /
- \/ \/ \/
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- Episode #...something. Stratford eats Cocks: lurking emails.
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- YEAH!!!MAILS MAILS MAILS MAILS MAILS MAILS MAILS also cocks.
- /*
- awesomeness:
- 1. An unmeasurable amount of awesomenimity something can produce.
- urbandictionary
- */
- What people are thinking right now about Stratfor hack:
- ':'( I want my mommy...'
- -George Friedman, Stratfor CEO
- '1,2,...3,....what was the next?'
- -Ashton Kutcher
- 'I'm the One, I'm the messiah, I'm the new Sai Baba, bwahhhahhahh, I'll dominate the world!!!' <--- coocoo
- -Rupert Murdoch
- 'hmm...the new rhetoric of the lulz, a machiavellian pandemonium full of strong sexual references and intensive recalls to Jung's archetypes. fuck, it's cold in montreal, I'll go shopping...'
- -Biella Coleman
- 'oh shit, I need to think quickly about something to keep the media attention on me...I need attention...I truly need it..'
- -Barrett Brown
- 'hmmm...I'll fap to those AntiSec guise whilst Barrett is not looking'
- -Emma_A
- 'SOPA, no SOPA, SOPA, no SOPA...oh! sweet! coins!'
- -President Obama
- 'hmm...same trolling shit as usual, I'll go back to WoW'
- -Quinn Norton
- ':3 i want icecream'
- -kayla
- Hi guise. Well, we know all of you are waiting for those Stratfor emails. they ll be online soon, in a fucking lulzy awesome way. meanwhile enjoy this lulzy teaser with us.
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- From: [email protected]
- Subject: Re: Gray if you ever so much as criticize me again I will hurt you intentionally.
- Date: 2011-05-07 23:09:14
- Content:
- Thanks, Derek. Keep me posted.
- -- Mike
- On 5/7/2011 4:04 PM, Derek Kerl wrote:
- Mike, wanted you to know I just read these after we spoke by telephone.
- I will check with Will and Dr. Bach to get more info, including his
- follow up RN appointment. Will be in touch.
- Derek
- On May 7, 2011, at 12:05 PM, Mike McCullar
- wrote:
- Just when I had my hopes up about the new med. Gray Fuller copied me
- this morning on this email exchange with David....
- -------- Original Message --------
- Subject: Re: Gray if you ever so much as criticize me again I will
- hurt you intentionally.
- Date: Sat, 7 May 2011 11:25:44 -0400
- From: Gray Fuller
- To: David McCullar
- CC: Mike McCullar
- David,
- I called you earlier today to talk and catch up. I hope you're having
- a good day.
- We have talked about the fact that inappropriate emails will not be
- tolerated. I am copying your dad because we're friends and I want to
- be completely transparent about my communications regarding this
- email. This is an example of an email that I will not tolerate. Do
- not send another one like it, I'm sorry if this truly represents the
- way you feel.
- Since you have not respected my requests and continue to use
- outrageous emails as a means for attention, I want you to know that
- the only action I will take upon getting another email like this is to
- forward it on to Mike. Making outrageous threats and berating me is
- not the right way to get my attention-I cannot be more clear.
- Please know that I'm not doing this to get you in trouble and that I
- don't expect Mike to punish you - thats not the point. These are
- serious threats and my goal in adding Mike to the conversation is to
- create an accountable mediator in the form of someone we both love and
- trust.
- David, you and I are best friends, we always have been and always will
- be - I expect that you will not talk to me this way and I will extend
- the same courtesy to you. I think we should try to designate a weekly
- time to talk for 30 minutes or so, that way we can keep in touch
- better. Does that work for you? If so, I was thinking about 6pm
- Texas time on Tuesdays.
- Let me know and I'll call you then.
- Gray Fuller
- On May 7, 2011, at 5:39 AM, David McCullar
- wrote:
- Gray I hate you. Your ugly ass mother thinks she can boss your dad
- and my dad around concurrently and criticize everyone including your
- pathetic soulless faggot ass while she has no heart and tried to
- offer us sanctimony for losing my mother. Then you told me I
- couldn't go to Austin High after I met Jenna Bush there. I have half
- a mind to murder you because while you were hiding me in the twins
- shadows because I am richer than you Barbara got raped, but your
- homoerotic pederast perverted faggot self will throw stones in a
- glass house like a son of a bitch when you receive this message
- because I am on a pr tyrrade to sabotage your unholy career as the
- worst motherfucking operative the White House ever saw while Bush
- was in office as governor and president. I will never talk to you
- again you stupid motherfucking pussy. Eat shit you faggot. You new
- money slave motherfucker die young and see how your kids feel about
- it so I can turn the tables on your white trash poor ass and torment
- them just like your whore of a mother lawyer bitch did to me because
- you owe it to me to be my slave you fucking slave. Don't even cry. I
- want to fight you. Don't rationalize shit. I am coming for your
- white trash ass and you better run.
- -----Original Message-----
- From: David McCullar
- To: katrinapeterson33
- Sent: Sat, May 7, 2011 12:15 am
- Subject: Barbara please don't ignore me lady.
- Barb,
- Why don't you tell me who you have been with that makes you feel
- so much more preternatural of a celebrity because of natural
- selection and... of course, because your celebrity which is
- obviously preternatural because of natural selection was engineered
- by democratic arbitration. You can't rob me of my genetic composite.
- You're not going to smoke my pineal gland. Did you know that I am
- fucking smart and smarter than Robert Pattinson or whoever you have
- been trying to be contemporaries with the white trash hoe Angelina
- Jolie making porn with, and easily more charming because I am not a
- tween automaton? Did you know that the alkaloid of DMT is actually a
- neurotransmitter like LSD 25 and 5-MEODMT, psylocin A + B and all
- psychadelic drugs because the definition of psychadelia is a
- neurotransmitter that the metabolite itself thereof creates a
- kaleidoscopic vision of geometric proportions in the pea and pea or
- whatever attachment to the pineal gland there is with light cones OR
- rods also depending on genetics, and depending on genetics the
- chromosomal filtration of certain neurotransmitters within these
- rods or cones which also illustrate in the visual cortex apparently?
- Have you been fucking any celebrity studs? You shouldn't have been
- because they don't understand you like I do and I am the Powhatan of
- the Royal American Family, you said I was cute or whatever, I am
- losing weight and I love you more than anyone else in the whole
- world but we are both desensitized by rape and jihad and porn so
- that we don't lust for eachother as much as we do feel bipolar
- sexually for other individuals we can abuse or submit ourselves to?
- I am really uncomfortable with you submitting to other men and
- uncomfortable with how you abused me. I was so nice to you and you
- shouldn't be scared that I want to crucify your rapist because I
- killed Osama Bin Ladin as the scapegoat from your dad's childhood
- for his and mine bombing the Pentagon and WTC's, believe me... I'm
- sure he has mentioned it to you and laughed. I went to treatment
- after hiding in your shadows, stalking Ben Curtis because I didn't
- like him during love at first site, and demonstrating respect to the
- Stewards (Martha's family) while at Casis and living in Pemberton. I
- didn't get into Yale from treatment because my dad is not as wealthy
- as you are, but I would have gone to Yale if my mom hadn't died or I
- had stayed at St. Stephens or god forbid my dad's first boss' bratty
- oldest son had "let" me go to Austin High. Gray is such a faggot. I
- am going to use him from now on like the son of a bitch he is to
- sing and play guitar because that is the only motherfucking thing he
- is good at including being a best friend, getting married, being a
- family man, and being consoling to me after my mother died. Nancy
- Fuller is a ridiculous ugly fat bitch who withdrew from our family
- when my mom died and thought she was more important because my
- family who is richer than theirs lost our Matriarch who was only a
- landowner with a college education at the University of Texas and
- not some land shark Byron Fullerton bitch lawyer thus distancing my
- best friend from me for life and giving him the impression that he
- is in charge. I hate the Fullers. I am in love with you and they
- offered me sanctimony for grieving the loss of my mother when I
- should have been girding my loins for you like Walker and Jenna at
- Austin High. Gray wanted to show me all the punk people at your
- school who I could not be friends with because my drummer from St.
- Stephens thought he was a faggot too and Gray aspires to be more
- fascist like Branden Lee Allen wishes he was more Indian when he
- takes mushrooms but doesn't know that they were from India who did
- that. Just, stupid motherfucking confused dead people. I would kick
- Gray's ass too. I know this is personal and close to home, and I
- want you to admire your feminine side and let me sweep you off your
- feet without all the intrigue that we got started at so young. I
- promise you a happy life with me at Stanford and Johns Hopkins or
- MIT if you will just be patient with me and plead OUR case to your
- relatives. We were going to get married if we could have been the
- judge of that? That was so immature when we decided that because we
- knew we couldn't... decide, that. We sure can, but its going to take
- a lot of work and I just wonder if you are as eager and willing to
- get them ready for us as I am? Barb, I am sorry for all the rude and
- funny things I said to you in poor taste. I wanted to tease you for
- all the ignorance your camp had displayed to me throughout my
- adolescence. I know its tough this mutual exclusion manic depressive
- bipolar disorder dom and sub self aggrandizement we all want for
- ourselves but I feel even keeled with you finally, and just hope and
- pray that you will save me from my libido which is so distracting
- and you are far prettier than that nasty cock sucker Gianna Michaels
- who I wanted to fucking marry for two days because she offered
- herself to me for money after talking all sweet and shit, hypnotized
- by you though... and not because you are just famous just because
- you are my high school lover. I know you didn't have a boyfriend in
- high school and I didn't have a girlfriend either. I was meek and
- you were not in bloom but at 17 I was more gorgeous than you until
- you started straightening your hair which is no big deal, I adore
- you. I love your family. I just fear you will continue lying to me
- or ignore me like Gray and Walker when I write to you. Please be my
- wife Barbara. I could get married in a year to you I think, in holy
- matrimony if you would lend your fellow man some compassion and make
- me your charity so that I can support a family with you after my MD
- is attained in Neuroscience and if you would contact me immediately.
- Those guys you like are gross. Stop fooling around, let's get
- serious.
- lovingly,
- David Frederick McCullar
- --
- Michael McCullar
- Senior Editor, Special Projects
- STRATFOR
- E-mail: [email protected]
- Tel: 512.744.4307
- Cell: 512.970.5425
- Fax: 512.744.4334
- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- ROFLMAOAPMP
- yeah, don't worry, wet pants for us too laughing at that...
- Stratfor's mails are full of Lulz.
- Stay tunned folks, more is coming!!!
- some shits they wrote will be ugly tho...we'll try to keep the lulz up anyway
- 2012.All rights and All your base are belong to us.
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