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TwinkieSWF

SWFanfic 2 Ch. 2: Hunter Goes Fast

TwinkieSWF
Feb 2nd, 2015
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  1. -----------------------------------
  2. SWFanfic 2: Ch. 2: Hunter Goes Fast
  3. -----------------------------------
  4.  
  5. Back at yumbunz's place, everybody gathered to watch the highly anticipated race between hunter and lotus
  6.  
  7. "THIS RACE SUCKS" said blue who was bored out of his mind.
  8.  
  9. "and here I thought waxing my balls was painful" said yumbunz as he was literally waxing his nuts
  10.  
  11. "SCREW THIS IM LEAVING" shouted Typhios so he could take another fap break.
  12.  
  13. everybody clamored in agreement and left the room with typhios for another fap sesh, but blue had to stay.
  14.  
  15. "BLUE, YOU'RE THE REFEREE, YOU HAVE TO STAY" shouted yumbunz who now had the most smoothest balls around
  16.  
  17. "NO ANYTHING BUT THAT I BEG OF YOU" said crybaby blue as blue tears fell from his eyes and across his cheeks
  18.  
  19. "MY HOUSE, MY RULES" said yumbunz as he licked the tears right off of blue's face and swallowed them.
  20.  
  21. "YUM" said yumbunz and then everybody was gone.
  22.  
  23. 16 days had passed since then and both lotus and hunter were still going at it. nobody wanted to suffer through the race so they had all gathered in one of the back rooms and played monopoly and ONLY monopoly for the entire 16 days. according to hourglass, he went to ask Blue three days ago who was winning the race, but he couldn't find out because Blue had long since killed himself.
  24.  
  25. "RIP blue" said yumbunz.
  26.  
  27. "RIP blue" said xiamul
  28.  
  29. "at least he got that one level" said wayward
  30.  
  31. a few moments later, matty1ce opened the bedroom door and said "okay its your turn" to yumbunz. yumbunz jumped into the air and said "YES" then told wayward to come with him so he did. xiamul, who was also in the room, and asked "his turn for what?" with youthful glee. matt pulled out a cigar from his pocket, sat down next to xiamul, then blew the cigar smoke at xiamul's face. xiamul coughed.
  32.  
  33. "you see sonny, when i was your age, i wanted to be just like my father. he was a world class dustforce player who got many world rekkies unlike anything the world had ever seen. they called him daddy1ce. i wanted to be just like him, so i practiced for many streams in hopes that one day i could be as good as he was. but he wasn't impressed."
  34.  
  35. matty1ce looked down as he took a deep breath from his cigar.
  36.  
  37. "'You aren't good enough for the Matty1ce name' he would tell me. that's when he started calling me baddy1ce. 'baddy1ce, you are such a disappointment' he would say. He also said things like 'baddy1ce, you are so bad' and 'baddy1ce, we should have never birthed you'. One day I got so upset that I threw my carton of chocolate milk on the ground, stepped on it with both of my feet and said 'I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, I HATE YOU!' then cried off like a little kid. That's when he started calling me bratty1ce."
  38.  
  39. A single tear could be seen falling from his face as he took the cigar from his mouth. He had a face of shame and a heart full of regret, but it was matty1ce's feelings so nobody really cared.
  40.  
  41. "i didn't want to be like my father anymore, i wanted to be more. I wanted to be better than my father, so i practiced for months and months until one day, i beat one of his world rekkies. 'I BEAT HIM!' I said in excitement, until i hit refresh one minute later and found out that he had already beaten me by a full 3 seconds. i refreshed again and Twinkie "THE GOD" SWF had also beaten me. i was buttdevastated. my wife walked in the room and asked "what's wrong sweetie", so I yelled 'NOTHING!' and beat her for hours upon hours until i heard the phone ring. It was my father, and what he said burns me till this day."
  42.  
  43. "what did he say" asked xiamul innocently.
  44.  
  45. matty1ce's face flushed with rage as he slammed the table with both of his hands.
  46.  
  47. "HE CALLED ME TO TELL ME 'BADDY1CE MORE LIKE MADDY1CE' AND THEN HUNG UP ON ME!".
  48.  
  49. there was an awkward silence. nothing was said during the awkward silence. then something was said.
  50.  
  51. "W-W-Why are you telling me this matty1ce?" asked xiamul like a good little boy because he was a good little boy.
  52.  
  53. "BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP AND STOP ASKING QUESTIONS, I'LL BEAT YOU JUST LIKE HOW I BEAT MY WIFE!" said matty1ce. "NOW HOLD THIS CIGAR FOR ME UNTIL I GET BACK!"
  54.  
  55. matty1ce handed his cigar to a clearly traumatized and underaged xiamul and started walking away.
  56.  
  57. "B-B-But you don't even have a wife" said xiamul who was about to get beaten by matty1ce just like how matty1ce used to beat his wife.
  58.  
  59. "I SAID SHUT UP" yelled matty1ce as he beat xiamul just like how matty1ce used to beat his wife.
  60.  
  61. "GET REKT SCRUB" screamed matty1ce as he left an unconscious xiamul all alone on the dusty carpet floor.
  62.  
  63.  
  64.  
  65.  
  66. End of Part 2
  67.  
  68. =========================================================================================
  69. INTERMISSION
  70. =========================================================================================
  71.  
  72. *MEANWHILE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN*
  73.  
  74.  
  75.  
  76. "My Lord, the deed is almost complete, but we might have a problem." said a mysterious voice.
  77.  
  78. "A problem?" said a familiar voice.
  79.  
  80. "Yes my Lord, a problem." said the mysterious voice.
  81.  
  82. "Ah, a problem." said the familiar voice.
  83.  
  84. "A problem indeed, my Lord." said the mysterious voice.
  85.  
  86. "This problem seems very problematic." said the familiar voice.
  87.  
  88. "The problem is very problematic, my Lord." said the mysterious voice.
  89.  
  90. "And you intend on solving this problem?" said the familiar voice.
  91.  
  92. "I do intend on solving this problem, my Lord." said the mysterious voice.
  93.  
  94. "So will it be.... problem solved?" asked the familiar voice.
  95.  
  96. "Yes my Lord, but there is one other problem." said the mysterious voice.
  97.  
  98. "Another problem?" said a familiar voice.
  99.  
  100. "Yes my Lord, another problem." said the mysterious voice.
  101.  
  102. "Ah, another problem." said the familiar voice.
  103.  
  104. "Another problem indeed, my Lord." said the mysterious voice.
  105.  
  106. "So what is this other problem?" asked the familiar voice.
  107.  
  108. "My lord, the problem is that somebody is going to have to die."
  109.  
  110. =========================================================================================
  111. END OF INTERMISSION
  112. =========================================================================================
  113.  
  114. (Written by TwinkieSWF and Illusion2438)
  115.  
  116.  
  117.  
  118. -----------------
  119. Table of Contents
  120. -----------------
  121. SWFanfic Book 1
  122. Chapter 1: http://pastebin.com/fXtjuje5
  123. Chapter 2: http://pastebin.com/PeJS3nxe
  124. Chapter 3: http://pastebin.com/xZdrR2mS
  125.  
  126. SWFanfic Book 2
  127. Chapter 1: http://pastebin.com/PbnGUrt1
  128. Chapter 2: http://pastebin.com/YGsQh2em
  129. Chapter 3: http://pastebin.com/Ebqtv6F2
  130. Chapter 4: N/A
  131. Chapter 5: N/A
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