Public speaker One shot.

>Looking upon the millions of ponies, you say one thing.
"I only have one thing to say about my old world."
>They stare at you with the hint of "GET ON WIT' IT!"
"My old world was not a nice place, we called places that sold relics about a game called Battletoads, and laughed when they were angered."
>You stop to catch your breath.
"The worst part is that, while we didn't like it when we knew the person, but some people would laugh when they saw a random person committing suicide, or one murdering another."
>Some look scared, some are even crying.
"The people that liked it, were messed up, but that I was like them, is an understatement."
>A few ponies look shocked, others, not amused.
"But, every so often, you would see the occasional, thing that would make you think 'What a dumbass?' and it would be okay, because it was something everyone could agree with."
>They look more interested than when you began.
"That out of every five retards, there was one that would go beyond the call stupid, and do anything the others would say."
>Some laugh, others stifle their giggles.
"The best part of that, is that it reduces the worlds retard population."
>"What about the rest of the worlds populace?" you hear from the crowd.
>You laugh and equip your propeller hat.
"What populace?"
>You then jump and fly away using the hat.
>Or you would, if that actually worked in this world.
>You instead plummet 20 feet.
>And break your legs.
"Ow. OW. OWW. FUCK THAT HURTS."
>The crowd looks at you.
>And laughs.
>Trying to crawl you ask,
"Can someone help me?!?"
>The only answer you get is out of a small grey coated and purple earth filly.
>"Okayy, mister hooman."
"Umm, can anyone else help me?"
[spoiler]>"I sometimes watch my sisters go potty."[/spoiler]
>God you attracted a real retard now...
>Guess that's the magic of being a leader.