q

quitting speedrunning isn't that big of a deal really, and my reasons for doing so are many.

firstly I want to say that I made some really good friends and hope they stay my friends moving forward.

also I apologize if at any moment I came off as an asshole in the speed community, this usually revolving around leaderboard bullshit. I have a short temper and it gets in the way sometimes, though I never mean to come off as rude. I just care about this hobby I found so many years ago now.

reasons are simple: speedrunning requires too much time investment. the hobby as a whole seems to have been on a very slow down swing for a few years now. personal vendettas against me have made things less fun, and that extends to vendettas against others as well.

something i've noticed with the speedrunning/twitch community is the secretive nature in which individuals form relationships online, often around disliking/hating another person, or disagreeing with them in some way. perhaps it's only because this is the longest online community i've been apart of that i've never noticed this behavior in others, but it's sad to see in speed. the concept of openly discussing things in relation to leaderboard and/or rules changes, version differences, etc. doesn't exist. everything is handled in DMs. i know this not just because i've been on the receiving end of discussion against me in private, but because others have engaged in it with me as well. the concept of not actually discussing things openly of course extends beyond speed, to personal attacks on ones character. i'm not shocked that this happens, but certain individuals that I suspect of doing such things, towards me in this case, was confirmed recently. it's sad to see but i can't stop others from saying things about me, or anyone else, behind my back, or theirs. obviously this isn't just an issue with speed/twitch, but it's linked in my mind now as being something that occurs in this community. it makes me want to avoid it completely.

i wont give specific examples so as to not cause further issues, but it has come up enough in private to warrant me moving on. though ironically some of the instances of putting down other people in this community has occurred rather openly among other people. though it's important to note that it's usually in a hotel room, surrounded by people who you think all agree with you ;)

it just makes me question the friendships that people try to establish in this community, and just how genuine these things might be, but who knows the problem is likely with me, but i'd rather change and better myself outside of such a community.