Flea Bitten Fluffy

1/5
>Have a house in suburbia.
>Back yard borders on the woods.
>Fluffy pony is not allowed in the woods.
>You've painted a big yellow line on your lawn.
>15 feet from the edge of the woods.
>Fluffy pony not allowed to cross this line.
>Fluffy ponies are not good at listening or obeying.

>Go out back to check on fluffy.
>Left him playing in the back yard.
>It's safe...hedges too high for dogs to get in.
>Hawks are super-rare in this neighborhood.
>Okay, so where the fuck is fluffy?
>Call his name.
>Relief; fluffy comes scampering out of the woods.
"Where the hell have you been?"
>"Fwuffy expwowe! Have adventuwe!"
>Yeah, I'll give you an adventure...
>Grab fluffy tail, deliver three or four whacks to the butt.
"You are not allowed to cross the yellow line!"
>Fluffy plops down on the ground, bawling.
>"Fwuffy sowwee! Fwuffy fowget!"
"Come on, playtime is over...back in the house."
>"Nuuu! Fwuffy wan' stay owside! Fwuffy pway!"
"Disobedient fluffies do not get to play outside."
>Pick crying fluffy up.
>That's when you notice.
>His fluff is full of fleas.

2/5
>Awww shit.
>Put fluffy pony down quickly.
>Fluffy is confused.
>Then he notices the itching.
>"Whhaaa! Why itchies? Daddee, pwease scwatchies!"
>You inspect his fluff...he's crawling with them.
"Sorry Hamlet, you picked up a bunch of fleas in the woods."
>"What fweas?"
"Little bugs that itch and drink blood."
>"WHHAAAAHHH! Nu wan' fweas! Hewp fwuffy, daddee, hewp pwease!"
>Fluffy falls down and starts writhing in the grass.
>"Dun wike itchies! Pwease buggies go 'way!"
"You need a special flea bath, Hamlet."
>Fluffy sniffles, but never stops scratching.
>He doesn't like baths.
>"Nu wan baff...pwease huggies!"
>Sits up and holds out front hooves, whimpers.
>Fluffies believe hugs make everything better.
>Not this time.
"No way...I'm not getting them on me too."
>Heartbroken fluffy cries for a hug.
"You wait here fluffy."
>Go inside, fluffy tries to follow.
>"Fwuffy wan' stay wif daddee, wan' huggies pwease!"
>Just 2 minutes ago dumb fluffy wanted to play outside.
>Block him with your foot, close door.
>Fluffy bawls and scratches hooves on the screen door.
>"Wan' inside!"
>Call a few local stores.
>It's too late to get fluffy flea shampoo.
>You can get it after work tomorrow.
>What to do with fluffy until then?

3/5
>You aren't going to let fluffy in the house while he's got fleas.
>He needs some shelter for the night.
>Put up a small pup tent in the back yard.
>"Why widdle house?"
"You stay in here tonight, Hamlet...until you've had your bath."
>Fluffy pony freaks out.
>"Nuuu! Wan' inside wif daddee! Fwuffy have itchy buggies, wan' huggies make bettew!"
>Fluffy pony clamps onto your leg.
>You hate to do it, but you're gonna have to leash him.
>Fluffy hates his collar.
>Uncomfortable, pulls on his fluff.
>Fleas...can't come inside...now he's leashed to a tent peg.
>Worst day ever for fluffy.
>He never stops crying as you set up his tent.
>Food bowl...water bottle...an old blanket...some stuffed toys.
>No; bad idea...take away the stuffed toys, fleas can get on them.
>Fluffy can sleep with his ball instead.
>It's only for one night.
>Leave fluffy pony in the back yard.
>He's crying and screaming for you to come rescue him.
>Hopefully he'll tire out and quiet down as it gets dark.

>8pm. It's dark.
>Shit...fluffy is still screaming his head off.
>You can't do this to your neighbors.
>Go outside with flashlight.
>Miserable fluffy looks up at you with relief.
>"Daddee come get fwuffy! Fwuffy wuv daddee!"
"Nope...sorry Hamlet."
>Slip the muzzle over his snout.
>Forlorn fluffy pony whines in dismay.
>You can't let him inside.
>You can't have him keeping the neighborhood awake all night.
"Go to sleep Hamlet...I'll have the flea bath tomorrow."
>Fluffy whines and moans, but at least he's muffled.

4/5
>Check on fluffy pony in the morning.
>He never even used the tent.
>Leash stretched in the directing of the house.
>Give him a scratch behind the ears.
>Fluffy wakes up. Undo his muzzle.
>"Daddee come get fwuffy? Wet inside?"
"No Hamlet, you still need your flea bath."
>"Nu wan' baff! Haf itchy buggies! Wan' huggies fwom daddee!"
>You leave him tied up.
>Can't risk him running back into the woods.
"I've got to go to work now Hamlet."
>"Nuu! Dun weave fwuffy! Pwease hewp, gif huggies!"
>Leave fluffy...he's got food, shade, water.
>Gotta go to work.

>Pick up the flea shampoo on the way home.
>Fluffy is worse than when you left him.
>Eyes crusty with dried tears.
>Nose runny...skin irritated from constant scratching.
>Fluff filthy from rubbing on the grass.
"Hey Hamlet, I have the flea bath, you'll be okay real soon."
>Depressed fluffy focuses on the negative.
>"Pwease no baff! Fwuffy scawed baff! Pwease huggies!"
>Fill up a deep bucket with water.
>Pour in recommended amount of flea shampoo.
>Fluffy watches, whimpering in terror.
>"Nu baff...nu baff...nu baff..."
>Walk over, fluffy runs but is caught by his leash.
>Sharp twang sends fluffy toppling over backward.
>Unclip him.
>Dip screaming fluffy up to his neck in water.

5/5
>Being very careful.
>Fluffy ponies drown easily.
>Fluffy is not helping any.
>Struggling against you, trying to escape.
>Fluffy never shuts up.
>"WHAAAAHH! Watew cowd! Buwning owwies!"
>Well, the shampoo bottle said it may burn a bit.
"Okay Hamlet, last part."
>"Nuuuuuuuuu!"
>Right hand pinches fluffy nostrils, closes mouth.
>Left hand forces fluffy eyelids shut.
>Dunk fluffy pony under.
>Internet says fluffies can hold their breath for 20 seconds before brain damage.
>Play it safe...count to 10.
>Traumatized fluffy pony gasps for air.
>Amazing; fluffy pony didn't drown.
"There, that wasn't so bad."
>Blow dry fluffy pony.
>Another traumatic experience.
>Fluffy is terrified of the blow dryer.
>Crying and trying to run away the whole time.
>Finally, you are done.
>Comb through Hamlet's fluff.
>Find only dead fleas.
>Success.
>Exhausted fluffy finally gets his hug.
>Nervously asks "Pway now?"
"Yes Hamlet, you can go play now."
>"Yay! Fwuffy go adventuwe!"
>Runs straight for the woods.
>Fucking fluffy ponies.