Suicidal Anon in Equestria

>You are Anon
>It's around 2:00 Am
>Looking outside the window you can see a slight breeze pushing and pulling the apple trees as a full moon shines bright.
>You feel as empty as ever.
>You remember your life back home. It wasn't the best, but you know it wasn't worth throwing away to come here.
>Spending countless hours lying awake. Thinking of how much better it would be to live in a world full of magic.
>And of course friendship.
>Something you couldn't obtain on Earth.
>It's still unclear how you even got to Equestria. One minute at home, the next, you're in a land full of colorful pones.
>The details are fuzzy, yet you remember doing something specific before you got here.
>It doesn't matter now. Nothing really does.
>Who would have guessed your isolated lifestyle and lack of friends would land you in the same position you were on earth.
>When they first saw you. Most were scared. Terrified even. Thinking you were some kind of monster.
>Even after being explained, most ponies still hide and whisper to each other at the sight of you.
>Nobody looks you in the eye.
>They all give blunt answers when you try to start a conversation. They just want you to go away.
>You couldn't make friends even if you wanted to.
>Somehow, you had to find a way to support yourself. So after some job searching, the apple family reluctantly offered a job working on the farm.
>They even offered a guest bedroom for you to stay in.
>It was kind. But they still had the same behavior and demeanor to you. Just like the other ponies.
>Cold. And distant.
>This place wasn't a dream come true. As cheesy as it sounded. It was a nightmare.
>And it was time to stop it.
>You've been working on this farm for 3 months now. Mostly simple stuff. "take this here, put that there." That kind of thing.
>But the apple family never really acknowledged you as a being.
>Blank stares and expressions.
>You once caught them together sharing a laugh in the kitchen.
>You thought maybe you could chime in.

"Ha, whats so funny?"

>Immediately the room was hushed to silence.
>Maybe a cough or two.
>"Oh, heheh it's nothin anon. Just a uh.. pony joke, ah don't think you'd get it." Applejack said, breaking the silence.
>Applejack was the only member of the family that talked to you. Even if it was just small talk.
>She even listened to things you said. And contributed her thoughts to them.
>But at the same time she always had a worried expression on her face when she talked to you.
>It made anything she said to you feel hollow. Like she was only talking because she had to.
>As the days went by. The lack of social interaction started to eat away at any optimism you had.
>You were just a machine.
>Preforming tasks day by day for the apple family.
>A simple work mule.
>But hell, even mules had friends here!
>2:25 AM
>It's time to make this all end. Make all this pain just stop.
>You had taken a rope from the barn while no one was looking yesterday. You hid it under your bed.
>Slowly you shift your gaze from the window. To the bed. Crouching down you grab the rope coil.
>You tie one end into a noose.
>It wasn't difficult. After all you had plenty of time to practice, being alone most of the time.
>The guest room has wooden beam that goes across the length of the ceiling.
>There was even space between the beam and the ceiling itself.
>You climb on top of the bed to reach it.
>It was almost too easy securing the rope there.
>After that is finished, you go to climb back down.
>You loose your footing and fall to the floor. Landing with a very loud and audible THUD.

"fuck"

>You lay on the floor for a bit. Soaking in the pain.
>'I hope nobody heard that' you think to yourself. Slowly you start to get up.
>You would have to work a little quicker now. If somebody did hear that, they were certain to come and investigate.
>You had intended to write a note. But decided against it. It's not like anyone would read it anyway.
>You grab a chair sitting in the corner of the room and drag it under the rope.
>Climbing on top, you take the noose and slide it over your head.
>You stand there. Atop a chair with a rope around your neck. Facing the window. The moon is beautiful.
>You're entranced by it. A small smile forming across your face.
>A tear rolls down your cheek.
>you kick the chair out from under you. Instantly you feel the rope tighten around your neck.
>You try your best to be still and let death take you without a fight.
>The door opens.
>A tired voice begins to speak "Anon, did you hear a-"
>Her eyes widen.
>"ANON!"
>She quickly climbs up and unties the rope with her teeth in a matter of seconds.
>You fall to the ground.
>Feeling the blood shift around your head. Dizzy and gasping for air.
>Applejack runs to your side.
>"ANON! What in all Equestria were you doing?!"
>You turn to Applejack. Your vision slowly becoming clearer.
>Head still swimming. You attempt to say something.
"a..applejack? why...what...what are you doing here?"
>"Whats wrong with you anon?! You couldof' died!"
>Regaining your senses. You look at her. She was genuinely terrified.
>It was strange. It was probably the first time seeing any kind of reaction from anybody.
"That was kind of the point"
>Head still throbbing you look to the floor. Then back to applejack.
>Her eyes are darting around the room.
>"But, why would you?! How could?! Ah Don't..!?"
>Tears start to roll down her face.
>Suddenly, she wraps her front hooves around you. Pulling you in. Fully embracing you. Squeezing tight.
>"No no no no no"
>She says over and over in a sobbing, shaking voice.
>"No anon. Just...No...ah... ahm so sorry"
>Her voice now turned to whisper.
>You sit there now. Literally dazed and confused.
>What was all this? Did she really care? Were you just too dumb too see it?
>None of this made sense.
>And yet.
>You found yourself in tears aswell.
>Your arms find themselves wrapping around the scared and sobbing pony.
>And for a while you both sit there with each other.
>The moonlight shining through on top of you both, in the dark room.
>You attempt to ease Applejack's sobbing

"Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything wrong."

>She hugs you tighter.
>"Ah knew I shoulda s-said somethin"

"what?"

>She takes a deep breath
>"Anon, all this time. Ah have been worried about you. You just seem so..."
>She pauses. Still trying to compose herself.
>"Ah wanted to say something sooner. But the rest of the family said ah'd be wasting my time. That you weren't worth it"
>"This is my fault."

"Applejack I-"

>"Anon, please just know that we care about you! Or at the very least ah do! We can make this work! Together."
>She begins to sob again.
>"Just promise me you'll never do that again."
>Hearing her words. Changed something inside you. It was like there was reason and order in the world again.

"Ok, Applejack."

>She rests her head on your shoulder.
>You look outside the window at the trees... and at the glowing moon.
>And. At that moment. For the first time in ages.

>You could feel something.


End.