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                - >Day Satyr in Equestria.
 - >Aloe and Lotus have given you the day off.
 - >Fluttershy is at a vetinary convention in Vanhoofer.
 - >And Vinyl, your roomie, is running a series of discos on her new cruiseliner.
 - >So, long story short, you can't be bothered to get dressed today.
 - >You're going to lounge on your settee all day, and watch whatever's on TV.
 - >taptaptap at the door.
 - "The fuck?"
 - >Again, taptaptap.
 - >You're not sure who it is, but you don't really care.
 - >Seeing you lounging around in boxers isn't a big deal to the ponies.
 - "Door's open, c'mon in."
 - >The door opens.
 - >Mintygreenharp walks in.
 - >Not trots. Walks.
 - >As in, balancing on two back legs.
 - >She has carrots magically stuck to her front hooves, and a badly done wig on her head.
 - >Probably horsehair or something else low quality.
 - "What the sorrel hells are you doing, Lyra?"
 - >L: "Fluttershy said you don't love her! And she thinks you won't love her until she finds your fetish.
 - >L: "I already know your fetish though, Mister.
 - >L: "Just like me! Your fetish is humans!"
 - "Well... Where I come from, 'humans' isn't really a fetish. But..."
 - >She pouts, pulling a face like someone spilt her drink, or somesprite stole her sweetroll.
 - "Look, I'm flattered and all. But you're being Fluttershy levels of weird right now. That's definitely not my fetish."
 - >She frowns, and her carrot finger things flex slightly, in a field of her magic.
 - "Yeah, that's actually turning me off. Bugger off"
 - >She starts to cry, and turns to leave.
 - >Her hooves aren't made for balancing though, and she topples as she turns.
 - >Her carrot hands smash to the ground, pulping vegetables all over your floor.
 - >Her face smacks into the doorframe, and blood spills from her nose, mixing with the vegetabley mash on the floor.
 - >she moans, in pain, and rolls her face through the mess.
 - >Oh god, how'd she know?
 - "YES! Lyra! Filthy, messy ponies ARE my fetish!"
 - >She moans again.
 - >Obviously she's delighted to hear this.
 - >Definitely not barely hanging onto consciousness.
 - >NOPE.JPG
 - >Quick as a flash, you whip down your trousers, and take a dip.
 - >Ten minutes later, you pull out, and make the mess coating her head even more... well... messy.
 - >Her mane is gunked up, her lips are covered in pony blood, and she's never looked better.
 - >You grab her tail, and drag her into your bedroom, caveman style.
 - >Little did Fluttershy know,
 - >abuse is your fetish.
 
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