>Ross: Join The Second Memo

-- absoluteAnomaly [AA] opened memo on board TEAM  PAD-LOCK --


AA: Oh. Glub. No one else is here.


-- absoluteAnomaly [AA] has invited AD, AP, DA, DD, DP, PA, PD, and PP to the memo --


AA: Okay... that should work!
AA: Hey... is anyone here yet?
PD: Wait, what is this?
PD: ""ACCEPT REQUEST TO CONNECT TO ADP?" Yeah okay let's get my Space Voodoo Wireless back on.
PD: Now what, AA?
PD: I am kind of busy here not dying.
AA: Well I don't know, glub! Nessie said to wait for people to talk too but no one is talking and it's frustrating and lonely and and and
AA: ARGH it sucks :(
PD: Ohhhh. I'm supposed to wait for space voodoo.
PD: But I said fuck that shit, and ran out the window and into that First Gate!
PD: It was pretty badass.
AA: First gate? what?
AA: ... did Nessie not explain something to me?
PD: I didn't know stuffed animals were particularly talkative!
PD: Sooooo....buh.
AA: Um... well Nessie got -- I don't know the word for it, but Mira threw him into this ball of light and he could start talking! I don't know what happened.
PD: Palebra's readme called that 'prototyping.' It's supposed to happen, I guess? Damned weird. Same thing I did to Sean's dead pet turtle. And my leftovers. I am just a tiny bit remorseful about said leftovers.
AA: Wait... you prototyped FOOD?
PD: I prototyped CATFISH, the best most delicious food. He has a cajun accent. And tried to bite my fingers.
AA: What the fish sticks.
AA: I mean, like seriously. What. The Fucking. Fishsticks.
PD: You just don't understand southern cuisine.
AA: I don't eat fish!
AA: Gosh.
PD: Fair enough. You're missing out. So.....
PD: Just a guess here. You're not stranded somewhere on a rusted monolith in an endless expanse of sky and weirdly lit clouds, right?
AA: Nope! I'm on this big, kind of square, sandy island place! There's sea all around me!
AA: It's kind of lonely, but Nessie likes it. He keeps finding things to eat.
DD: Oh thank god there are other people alive.
DD: Otherwise it would just be me and Batsprite.
DD: I'm surprisingly less okay with that than I would have previously anticipated.
PD: Ahahahaa you did BATMAN?
DD: Master detective. One would imagine he would be useful.
AA: ... I'm very confused.
AA: ... why does this not surprise me, though?
DD: Besides, DA ruined everything.
DD: As usual.
AA: What'd Leon do now?
DD: He broke
DD: uh
DD: something very dear to me.
DD: And in general was kind of a prick.
AA: Like ... what? Also, um... that's a surprise?
DD: Nothing in particular.
DD: And I guess not.
DD: I don't know, you'd think that the fact that I was about to die would spur him into seriousness for once.
PD: Man don't you know anything. None of us can take anything seriously, ever.
PD: I dunno maybe Joe can. Has anyone heard from him?
AA: Well, wai-- no, I haven't.
DD: I'm serious! I am very serious right now!
DD: And I haven't, unfortunately.
AA: I'm too lonely to be serious. :(
PD: I'm looking unhappy and regretful about that comment.
DD: I'm worried about the others, frankly.
DD: Why haven't they responded?
DD: Do you think something happened to them?
AA: They might be asleep?
DD: Hm.
PD: Not enough space voodoo yet.
AA: Why do you keep saying space voodoo?
PD That's what the Catfish called it. The thing that was going to bring my internet back.
PD: The....cowfish? Fuck whatever. Stupid cajun fish.
DD: You can criticize me for prototyping with Batman, but....
DD: Really? A catfish?
AA: Yeah. You know Nessiesprite? He's a bastard. >(
PD: He he was leftovers. They fell outta the fridge. Bastard stole my breakfast with his existence. I would be more upset and bitter if he wasn't awesome like Uncle Frank.
DD: Nessie didn't work out, huh?
DD: And ... yikes.
AA: Well, it's working out /okay/. But he's very grumpy and he keeps making me call him this weird, like, Shakespearian title!
DD: Batsprite keeps accusing me of being a part of his Rogues Gallery.
DD: Only he doesn't pronounce the names properly.
DD: He called me Senor Freeze.
DD: I'm not sure how I feel about this.
PD: I know that it's fucking hilarious.
DD: For you, maybe.
PD: Laughing and laughing here.
PD: Shit the imps spotted me.
AA: Nessisus the Pure And Noble! What the fish sticks. Wait, what imps?
DD: Are you hiding from your imps?
DD: You should just ... hit them.
DD: That's what I did.
AA: What are imps?
DD: I figure you're talking about those weird little creatures, anyway.
DD: You don't have any, AA?
AA: Not that I sea... there's kind of nothing on the land, then there is LOTS AND LOTS OF SEA! Sea, hahahaha.
PD: HAH! Got 'em!
PD: Okay, let's figure out this train thing.
DD: At least you can see something.
DD: No pun intended.
DD: I can't see anything. It's too foggy.
AA: I wonder if the imps are what Nessisus was eating? He keeps chewing on these like, light I dunno, but... they sure are /something/.
PD: What's with that, anyways?
PD: It started with...the pocket watch I wound up? Yeah, definitely.
PD: And now it's everywhere.
DD: It's strange.
DD: I can't quite place my finger on it.
PD: Pretty, though.
DD: Yes.
DD: Something about it feels very nice. Kind of complete. But I don't really know what to make of any of it.
PD: Fsssh, just part of the magic fantasy land that's trying to kill us as we have mental breakdowns because it's better than meteors.
AA: I'm not having a meltdown! At least not now. I'm surrounded by fish, sea, I have my photography equipment, and -- actually I'm kind of happy.
DD: I'm displeased, but hardly breaking down.
DD: One can never characterize any of my recent behavior as breaking down, or coming anywhere close to tears.
DD: Mainly I just want to throttle Leon.
DD: As usual.
PD: The throttles-to-makeouts meter is going zero to sixty if you two ever meet up in person, isn't it?
DD: wait
DD: what
AA: hahahaha! YES IT IS!
DD: no
DD: no let's talk about something else
AA: but this topic is relevant to my interests
DD: this
DD: I would like to know about the others
DD: other than Leon
DD: He can die in a fire for all I care.
DD: In fact, he may have done just that.
PD: Hatesex is the best sex after all.
DD: So who were your client players again?
AA: Mine was ---
PD: Man I was second remember? I got Sean in. And Joe got me in. And threw the kitchen table out the window. And then made the kitchen HUUUUGE.
PD: That would be kinda neat if mom could come home and see it.
DD: Ah, of course.
AA: wait, hatesex? did you and DA do something?
DD: WHAT
AA: well you two argue ALL THE TIME
AA: gosh if I think it might be somethin' ~*romantic*~
DD: HEY
DD: NO
PD: Shit mom's dead.
AA: EEEK! WHAT?
DD: ...what?
PD: we left earth. what about everyone else?
DD: ...oh.
PD: okay maybe the meteors stop and they're not going to completely fuck everyone up. but we can't go back, can we? I'm never gonna see anyone else again.
DD: ...no, we can't. And somehow I'm led to believe that we were just spared from death by playing this game.
AA: ... but... but... ....
AA: *sniffle* ;_;
DD: Or....
DD: I don't know.
DD: I didn't really have anyone to leave behind anyway.
PD: bullshit. you'll miss earth. all we've got is what we've brought with us, now.
AA: B-bu-- ... g-glub...
PD: I guess we're a little bit better off than Arthur Dent in that regard.
DD: I will miss Earth.
DD: But I think the only people I really cared about just came with me.
PD: I'm...I'm never gonna see Dad again either.
AA: ....
DD: I'm ... sorry
DD: For all of your losses.
DD: ...hello?
DD: Are you guys still there?
PD: Shut the fuck up. Your parents have been dead forever. Give me some time to deal.
AA: don't yell at him!!
DD: I'm sorry, Ross, I didn't mean it that way.
PD: God fucking dammit. I thought I was over this shit. But nooooooo.
PD: And now ontop of a god damned FANTASY ADVENTURE QUEST?
PD: Real cute, universe. REAL CUTE.
AA: WILL YOU BOTH STOP IT!!!
AA: :(!!!
DD: I wasn't aware that I was doing anything.
DD: It'll help to focus on the game.
DD: Distracting yourself.
DD: It gives you purpose.
PD: Cathartic violence and single-minded purpose.
PD: It's the way of the Dark Knight, isn't it?
DD: shut up
AA: Oh I've haddock enough of it! We had our op-perch-tuna-ty to do something and now it's too late, and somethings has played the weaver and sole-ly grouped us into this small school, so don't be koi!
debonairlyPolaris joined memo TEAM PAD-LOCK
DP: Uhh, wow
DP: you guys talked a lot
PD: You're alive!
PD: You're okay, right? You got PP in?
DP: Uhh, yeah. I guess. I am not actually sure.
DD: What do you mean?
DP: I just kinda woke up.
DP: And then I was hot.
DP: And there was lava.
DP: And then teh proffesor's turtle told me things.
DD: You woke up?
PD: Hah, I knew it was okay to mess with the turtle. And you were so pissed.
DP: Uhh, yeah I kinda fainted after I ate the paper.
DD: Oh.
DP: What, is there another kind of waking up?
DP: I mean that is the only kind that makes sense.
AA: Oh glub!
DD: No, I was just wondering.
-- [AA] ceased responding to memo. --
DD: oh shit
DD: do you think something happened?
PD: Imps?
DD: I hope not.
DP: Man.
DP: I am thirsty.
PD: Something worse than imps?
PD: Shit, you're right. Some water would be nice. Angst and combat aren't so good for water retention.
DD: I wonder if I have anything in my fridge....
DD: Actually, I'm going to go check on that. I'll be right back.
PD: Godddamned catfish took my milk.
PD: Sean why the heck did you eat that paper?
DP: I PANICKED!
DP: I don't know what else i was supposed to do!
DP: What would have you done Mr.... Mr... MR PETTICOAT!
PD: ...
DP: ......
PD: ...what did you call me
DP: I stand by my statment.
-- absoluteAnomaly [AA] has responded to memo --
AA: ._. glub
PD: youokay?
AA: no
AA: I thought I heard something but there wasn't anything. Why is it so quieeeet. Glub. >:\
DP: ....I called Ross Mr. Petticoat.
DP: AND HE STILL HASN'T ANSWERED MY QUESTION!
AA: ... on second thought, maybe I should go back to not paying attention to this screen.
AA: Rooooooooooooooosssssssssssssssssssss.
DP: Oh fuck it, I'll get you privately
debonairlyPolaris ceaseed responding to memo
AA: ... glub?
AA: well, glub.
AA: I guess at least I can talk to myself.
AA: even if it's probably really boring or silly to everyone else.
AA: Fish sticks.
DD: Okay, so there was some iced tea in my fridge.
DD: Apparently I stayed fully stocked?
AA: At least you have a bathroom, too.
AA: I mean, not that I don't have one, but ... :|
DD: I'm still very sorry about that.
PD: Oh I'm not dead yet by the way.
DD: Oh there you are!
DD: I was worried when I saw that you didn't answer.
PD: It is difficult to solve train-related puzzles while simultaneously bashing pocketwatch-like imps.
AA: Glub.
dystopianAutocrat [DA] responded to the memo
DA: ok
DA: nobody panic
DA: especially not me
DA: but, i have no idea where i am
DD: oh god he's here
AA: YAAAAAAY! GLUB!
DA: i AM here, but i seriously dont know where here is
DA: its bright any shiny
DA: and really REALLY gay
AA: I thought you were dating DD, glub?
DD: Wait, where are you
DD: wait WHAT
DD: hold on a second here
DA: dating? what? maybe she wants all up on this hot jumpsuit
DA: but there are SUPER more important things right now
DD: WHAT
DA: we can talk about how much darkwing duck wants my socket wrench later
DD: ABSOLUTELY NOT
AA: glubglubglubglubg hahahahaha glub
DD: just
DD: answer this
DD: Where are you?
DA: if i knew that i wouldnt be freaking out a little bit
DA: not that i am
DA: because i really am not
DA: at all
DD: See, that's not very helpful.
AA: Yeah, right.
DA: ok, there is like, some kind of game board in the sky, i think someone has a settlers of catan game going
DA: which sucks, i want in
DD: ...what?
DD: You're ... where?
DA: ok, in my room
DA: but not in my room, ok?
DA: this is very strange
AA: how is that possible? unless you like, twinned yourself
DA: whoa, that was a haiku
AA: I applaud.
DA: uh, but there is some crazy huge city outside my window
DA: im not really sure what to make of it
AA: like any of us know anything anymore
AA: I have a loch ness for a sprite
AA: HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THAT?!?
DA: swamp gas reflected off venus, the loch ness monster isnt real
DA: durr
PD: I know that my family history of mental illness is being seriously validated by this experience.
AA: gee thanks :(
PD: Other than that, I know fuck all. Shit stopped making sense when I hit fantasty talking catfish land.
DD: yeah
DA: where are you guys? do you see something like this outside your rooms?
AA: No. All I have outside my house is sea.
AA: sea, and more sea, see?
DD: I don't see anything
DD: You're in
DD: a city?
DA: i think so? its like, really bright here, and everything has...i dont
 know...more to it than normal
PD: I was on a rusty platfom in the middle of nowhere, then I went X-TREME bungee jumping off the edge and now I'm like inside the rust silo and there's a train platform.
PD: Also....how bright are we talking here? On a ratio of 'just a little peyote' to 'ALL THE LSD,' how much drugs are you on right now?
DA: ok, thats boring
DA: mine is cooler
DA: really really bright, like "tripping balls" bright
AA: ... o.o
DD: How did you get there?
DD: Did you wake up there?
DA: well, i met some freaky iguanas with no eyes
DA: fucking wind in the willows shit all up in here
DA: but if it was written by lovecraft
DA: and they told me i was supposed to do something awesome, blah blah blah no news there
DA: and then they showed me some kinky sex orb and told me to take it and i was like "hey, free sex orb" so i did, now im here
PD: Kinky sex orb? I'll stick to my endless sky of pocketwatch clouds. Shit I need a zeppelin or something. Or a wingsuit.
AA: Kinky sex orb? So I was right, you and DD are dating.
DA: she wishes
DD: just
DD: I don't
DD: I'll be right back
AA: hehehehehehe
DA: shes going to whack it to a picture of me
DA: anyway
-- [DD] ceased responding to memo. --
DA: and there she goes
DA: the batman has the picture
DA: right so, i woke up here
DA: i think im supposed to save some lizards
PD: Teleporting sex orb. Righteous.
DA: for sure
AA: ...
AA: I'm still confused.
DA: so am i
DA: in fact i think i understand LESS after responding to this stupid memo
PD: I guess you could...explore the shiny city? No imps there, right? Maybe you'll find more helpful blind lovecraft love iguannas.
DA: man, they were the opposite of helpful
DA: they were hurtful
DA: emotionally
DA: but not really
DA: anyway, maybe exploring this place is a good idea?
DA: i have nothing else to do except look like a dork in a fruity jumpsuit
PD: Oh man, is it like something out of Flash Gordon?
DA: flash GAYdon
DA: but yeah, more or less
AA: Don't forget your computer
DA: alright, ill see you dudes later
DA: nobody die while im gone
DA: please
[DA] ceased responding to memo
AA: watch one of us die
AA: glub
PD: Please don't joke about that.
PD: I'm worried enough that we haven't heard from PP yet.
AA: It's PP, he's probably waiting at the final gate or game or whatever.
AA: 'PP:' what took you guys so long?'
AA: :|
PD: I dunno...he was going to enter last of us. What if meteors got him? Dude seemed to know at least a little bit more about what was going on, right?
AA: He always tended to know what was goin' on.
AA: It was his style. Cool dude.
PD: Smug bastard.
AA: Yup.
PD: Okay so I can't go drown my sorrows in mom's liquor cabinet, but I can attempt to fuck around with this train, and bash imp head in. I'm feeling a little bit better but still mostly like shit. I need to get up and do things.
AA: I still don't know what an imp is.
AA: But, okay! Have fun. I'll ... just sit here and wait like Nessisus told me too. -.-
PD: They are these little grubbly guys with pointed teeth that act like asshats
PD: Smearing their funny goop everywhere. Bash them in the head.
PD: Oh, and you get 'grist' for it. I think that's a game thing. Sounds familar.
AA: Huh. I'll have to ask Nessisus about that... and that... gate thingy... maybe.
AA: Maybe take a swim.
PD: Gate took me inside a skytower. So I guess...you'll go somewhere else in your ocean?
AA: Great. I hope it's water proof, otherwise there goes my laptop.
PD: Isn't your sylladex water proof?
AA: Where do I put a pictionary modii, seriously? Especially in a /swimsuit/? We won't even talk about my sai and where to put short stabby things!
PD: Sounds like you need a sealskin bag and some grease.
AA: Why, to make it slide better?
PD: To keep shit in that's waterproof and keep the sai from rusting. Not that I have any idea how the fuck you could find those things, but hey maybe you can improvise?
AA: Hm. Well, I guess we'll have to see!
PD: Atta girl.
AA: woof.