Incompatible

You've never really been one to use dating apps before, but lately you've been craving something new, something you never get out of your ordinary boring life, as such, you decide to look into various dating apps. Scrolling through your phone's app store, your eyes catch on a strange looking app with an odd rune as the logo. You read the description, it seems to be an app for those interested in human and monster relationships, something you have fantasised about before. Downloading it, you set up a profile, use some old pictures you think you look presentable in and set your preference to male, now you just need to browse through profiles, see what kind of monsters use this site.

After browsing for an hour or so, you've sent around 30 different monsters messages, none of them seemed to really have much in common with you at a glance, but you're hoping for the best. A notification rings out as you think to yourself, looking back to your phone, you see one new message, though it isn't from anybody you actually messaged, it's from some monster called G'yrtsar. Looking through his profile, he seems to not have many pictures of himself, mostly just home cooking and a couple pictures of the starry sky, though from what you can gleam, he's some kind of slimy sea creature? Your eyes begin to strain as you look closer to his pictures, you decide to message him back after this, thinking that you might have a chance to meet up with him to get a better look.

G'yrtsar: Hiya! I saw your profile and thought you looked really nice, uhm... maybe we could chat! if that's okay with you
Anon: Hey, thanks for messaging me! I just set up my profile, so it's nice getting a hit so quickly. I'd love to chat!
G'yrtsar: Yay! I'll be honest, nobody's really responded to many of my messages so I'm a little shy about putting more of myself out there...
Anon: It's okay, you seem nice to talk to, I don't know why nobody would respond.
G'yrtsar: Thanks, that's nice to hear... would you like to come over some time?
G'yrtsar: If that's okay with you
G'yrtsar: You don't have to, I don't want to be pushy or anything...
Anon: Sure, that'd be nice. I have got a question though
G'yrtsar: What is it?
Anon: Was all that food on your profile homemade?
G'yrtsar: Yes! I love to cook!
Anon: Then could I ask you to cook for me when I come over?
G'yrtsar: I would love to, when do you want to come over? I'm free all weekend!
Anon: Same, Saturday would be great, what time should I be there?
G'yrtsar: Uhm, maybe around 12 your time, though time flows a little weird here
Anon: Oh, alright, where do you live?
G'yrtsar: The uhm, chaos realm...
Anon: Isn't that where like, all the creepy stuff is?
G'yrtsar: Y-yeah...
Anon: I've always kinda wanted to go there, how the heck do I?
G'yrtsar: Wait, you're okay with me living there!?
Anon: Yeah, I wouldn't be on here if I wasn't a little fucked up
G'yrtsar: Heh, I guess I got really lucky being the first to snatch you up!
Anon: I mean, I'll have to pass judgement when I meet you for real
Anon: But you seem really nice, don't get me wrong
G'yrtsar: Alright, here, I'll post my address and some stuff about how to get here and back safely!

After much discussion on occult matters and how to get oneself between realms, you finally manage to set up some matter of portable device which you can use to help navigate the strange world you're going to be visiting. This is probably the craziest first date you're ever going to have, even though you're probably just going to hang out and eat some tasty food. After a few more days chatting with G'yrtsar, you finally wake up on the Saturday morning to get yourself ready. Getting into a nice set of clothes, you saunter out of your house at 11:45, hoping that you have enough time that the trip doesn't make you late. You set up the device and close your eyes as instructed, pressing the buttons on either side, you feel strange as you phase between what you assume to be the curtain in between dimensions, after a minute or so, the feeling stops and you only hear a soft ringing in your ears. Walking down the street, everything seems to be distorted oddly, as if constantly shifting, you don't doubt for a second that you've gone someplace alien to your world, finding your way around you slowly walk over to where G'yrtsar said his house was. It appears oddly homely despite the strange shifting it undergoes like every house, you feel warm as you approach the door, ringing the bell, you hope he's inside cooking up a storm.

The warmth goes away quickly after the bell rings, shock seems to fill your head, your scared, not understanding what's happening, you hear a voice talk in the recesses of your mind, "Anon!? Is that you? I didn't expect you to be here so soon!" The shock fades away, replaced with a nervous fluttering inside of you, it doesn't take long for you to realise that maybe there's more to him than just being a weird sea monster guy. "Heya!" you yell out, "Is it just me or do you have this weird fluttering feeling?" Your heart sinks as your words leave your mouth, the back of your mind hearing "Dang it, of course all the rumors are true... I'm sorry if you want to head back home now I don't blame you, I'm probably not good for you..." You weren't expecting this, you think for a moment then yell out, "I already came all the way here, why don't we see things through?"

You see the door's handle slowly turn, the monster standing before you as it opens, he shyly looks at the ground, it's too cute you could die. Actually you might be dying, your eyes burn like they've been dipped in acid, you double over, clutching your face. "OH GOD I'M SO SORRY" you hear over and over again all around you, constantly echoing through your head, you can't think straight as you slump onto the ground.

Waking up, you open your eyes to see only darkness, all you feel is a deep sadness and a worry for ... yourself? You sit up slowly, bringing your hands to your face, you realise you have had a blindfold on. Your memories of what just happen flood back and you feel a little bad for what happened, you decide to call out to him. "I'm awake, what's the deal with the blindfold?" You hear footsteps slowly come towards you, and something like someone blowing their nose before the voice once more resonates through your skull "H-hey, I'm sorry about what happened earlier, I didn't know that humans wouldn't be able to look at me without something like that happening." You smile, "It's okay, what I did see of you looked great, thanks for taking care of me!" You sit up, you seem to be on a couch from what you can feel, "I'm uhm, a little hungry, if the offer of your cooking is still on the table, I'd love a bite to eat!" You smile warmly in what you assume is his direction. You hear a couple of steps towards you before feeling a deep sense of worry as you feel him lean down and wrap his arms around you. Your heart flutters as he holds you, your arms around him in turn, you gently cuddle for a second or so longer before he breaks the cuddle. "Alright! Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart, I really appreciate you bearing with me... also, if you want, you can take of the blindfold, I'll make sure to knock before I come in so you know to put it on again, until then feel free to mess around with my stuff."

Hearing him leave the room and close the door, you take of the makeshift blindfold, it seems to be one of his shirts, many sizes too big for you. Looking back around the room, it appears somewhat hazy, like much of this realm, you take a look at the tv, seeing an arrangement of old consoles under it in a glass cabinet, you marvel seeing even obscure things like the Turbografx 16. You take a look at the bookcase next to it and slowly peruse, realising that most of the contents are actually games, you smile, fingering through each of the games you finally stumble upon a classic you haven't played in a while, grabbing out the NES cartridge, you blow into it before opening the cabinet and slipping it in. Booting up the NES you hear the classic intro of none other than Contra, quickly inputting the Konami code, you pray that you got it in time as you start the game.

You managed to get so engrossed in the game, you didn't even hear the knocking behind you getting louder. You finally feel a tap on your shoulder, snapping you out of your laser focus on the game, you quickly pause it and fight the urge to turn and face him. "Heya, sorry I couldn't help myself, haven't played it in forever." You smile down at the ground, wary you could potentially hospitalise yourself by turning around, he pipes up after a few seconds, "No, I was surprised how well you were doing, I collect all these, but I'm kind of awful at them in all honesty, anyway, I made you something!" You see the plate out of the corner of your eye and put a hand up as he passes it to you. On the plate is a piece of quiche, and to the side is an amazing looking cookie with "I'm Sorry"  piped onto it with icing. You chuckle a little as you see it and hear him sit down against the sofa behind you, "Thanks a bunch for this, it looks great!" He stays quiet and you feel strangely sad as you look at the meal he made for you, "I'm really sorry... I didn't think things would go like this..." You frown, taking a bite out of the quiche and slowly chewing it, you think about what you're going to say. Swallowing it down, you open your mouth, "This is some really good food, I couldn't have asked for a better time here!" You feel a wave of emotions wash over you, confusion being the most prominent, you simply eat as your host sorts out how he feels.

After a few minutes you finish the meal and have only the cookie left, you happily split it in two and place the blindfold back over your head, turning to his direction you motion the cookie in front of where you assume he is. "You want to split the cookie?" You feel his slippery clawed hand gently take the cookie from you and you both partake in it. The cookie tastes amazing, cooked to that perfect level, where it just melts in your mouth. You almost shed a tear with how good the cookie is, you stand up, putting the plate onto the ground and slowly stumble to where the monster is. You lean down and wrap your arms around him, him gently purring in your arms, you can barely keep your hold on him with how large he is. You happily nuzzle your head into him, feeling his body, it has an almost rubbery texture, with various tentacles sprouting from his head, you could liken him to cthulu if anything. "Are you really okay with this? Even though if you see me you'll have nothing but pain?" you feel his worries wash over you, almost as though his every thought of something that could go wrong is surrounding you. "I'm sure" you simply say, banishing all of the thoughts at once, you feel him finally hug you back again, gently resting in his arms, you ask one last question, "G'yrtsar, could I stay the night?"