Fluff Wash part 5

Fluff Wash Part 5

http://toranistheauthor.tumblr.com/

Warning:  This story contains fluffies being very uncomfortable.  Viewer discretion is advised.


How ya doin' buddy... Ya me too... things are going, well... not as I'd hoped...  these fluffies, they're just SO uncooperative!  They get fed, I shovel the shit out their pen every day, they've got toys, bedding... I just don't know what to do about it.  Would removing the smarty friend even make a difference?  They all seem to hate me now and every time I go back in it's all yelling about where their friends and babies are... Maybe I bit off more than I can chew... My sisters fluffies?  Oh it's like night and day!  One's well behaved and loving, the other actually BITES her and calls her names!  I've no clue how she can put up with that kind of crap in her own home, abuse from something that couldn't survive without her!... Of course I asked, she just said you gotta be consistant and eventually they'll come around.  HA!  Like that's working so well for her!  One angelic fluffy and one demon...

My tests aren't really... ok they're failures, every one.  I honestly thought the design was sound but the little fuzzballs seem bound and determined to ruin the thing at every turn.  Is it even worth it?... Well, the groomers I talked with said they'd be very interested since washing fluffies is such a pain with all
the thrashing and screeching and terror involved, finding a fluffy who wants a bath means finding a fluffy that's so rancid you're better off shaving it's matted fluff off anyway... Yeah, somewhere in their genetic coding someone MUST have put the fear of water into them.  Maybe because their fluff is so absorbent and weighs them down so fast that swimming is impossible?... Well you'd know that better than me.

And did I mention what happened to the smarty friend's foal?  Jesus Christ what a disaster.  Imagine a 2nd degree burn everywhere the shampoo touched, so everywhere but her face and mane... Pretty much non stop screaming.  Her mother was so scared she even let me take the foal out for "treatment"... Not exactly, I put her in a shipping box full of ice, they're scientists can work out whatever the hell caused this, it's my job to just gather the data.  She went out early this morning, even frozen she looked about as scared as a fluffy could if you ask me... Ya, they really value their fluff, it's like the number one status symbol amongst their *heh* "social order"... No, I haven't been back in yet, soon though.  The next test is in my Fluff Wash again, it's all fixed up and ready to go, whoopie.... Can you blame me?  All these failures have just sucked the enthusiasm right outta this project, not to mention the constant abuse the little bastards spew about EVERYTHING... Oh, can't WAIT to hear what Rain says about Sunshine when I do go
back... The truth?  That's about the worst idea you've ever had!  There'll be an organized revolt or some such shit and they're bad enough as is.  Nah, I'll make up some BS about Sushine being in fluffy hospital.

Know what's weird?  Boulder died in test three, pulled his head out of the isolation notch and drowned yet Rain barely said two words about him being gone... It's more than that, he was her foal too!... I  know!  Weird shit.  He was small for a foal, I mean real small.  Rain wasn't even feeding him, she had some other mare doign it for her at the shelter... Could be female smarties kinda, I dunno, delegate their foals to other mares so they can get back to leading?  How hard could it be to lead a bunch of those stu- ok pretty hard.  But seriously, he never came back and she didn't say shit.  Maybe fluffies have favorites just like parents in the animal world.  I should add that to my fluffy social studies booklet... It's just a little something I'm tossing together during testing, like my observations on how they act...  Again you'd know more about it than I would.

Well, time to face the music.  Now I have the pleasure of hearing that bitch squawk about her baby or herd or food or poop or whatever...Yeah, overall it looks like if I can get this thing running right it'll sell quite well... It's just hard to work up any enthusiasm when every time...I know... I know that too... Heh, yeah, you're right, I can't deny that.  No one said that could be done then either, but if I can build a baseball bat proof mailbox I can build a fluffyproof washing machine... You're a really good sounding board man, thanks.  Let's do this again same time tomorrow... You got it.  See you then Streak.

*Our inventor removes the feeding tube from Streak's throat.  He hoses it off before hanging the hastily constructed apparatus out to dry and leaving his petrified fluffy standing centered in a littler box, his red tail held back with a close pin out of consideration for cleanliness.  He turns and waves to the yellow pegasus before flicking the lights, leaving the fluffy to four dark, featureless walls and a window forever just out of sight.  Streak continues to stare straight ahead, body ridgid and unmoving.  If it wern't for the low muttering of his on and off gibberish he'd appear for all intents and purposes as a stuffed animal.  However, closer inspection by a curious individual would reveal a tiny tear forming in the corner of his eye.*

*creak* All ri-

"Whe' baeh!?!?"

And good evening to you too Rain.  Sleep well?

"Gih baeh!!"

Sorry?  What was that?

"Baeh!  Baeh!"

Bay-eh, hmmmm... you know Rain I can't understand you if you don't use your words.

"Muhha gih hunhine!"

Give hun hine?  What's a hun hine?

"Muh ha na ha!!!"

OOOOOhhhhhh! I get it, you groomed Sunshine last night didn't you?  Here, let me take a look at your mouth.  Oh yeah, trying to bite me is gonna work real well right now, feels like being hit with jello.  Remember jello jigglers?  Loved that shit as a kid, it was jello so tough you could carve it into shapes,
pick it up with your hands, my mom-  well, I guess you wern't born yet.

"Muhhhhh mhhhhmmmm!!"

Yep, the inside of your mouth looks like your daughters body did this morning.  Remember that?  The redness, the sacs of pus, her fluff falling out in clumps... Damn she's ugly now.

"Baeh pihiht baeh, hoonan uhwe!"

If that meant what I think it meant I won't give you the medicine to fix this.

"muhhey gef beffa?"

Maybe.  I took Sunshine to the, uh, fluffy hospital.  They're taking good care of her there.

"Hunhine gef beffa?"

Again, maybe.  So are you gonna take your medicine and get better or are you too good to ask a human for help?

"...Hage hoonan."

"Wain, pwease get med'sin, get bettah.  Hewd nu un'stan yu, hewd scawed!"

Gonna leave your herd without leadership?  Ah well, I'm not worried, I'm sure after a while of not being able to eat you'll get weaker and weaker... They'll pick a new smarty friend soon enough.

"Whan ih smhaggy hen!"

They don't need a weak fluffy who can't even tell them what to do.

"Whan ih smhaggy hen ho enah!  Gih mehihin."

Want the medicine huh?  All right I've got some from the hospital right here.  All you have to do is say please.  I'll even give you mashed up kibble instead of the pellets the others eat 'till you're better.  Just say please.

"Hage hoonan!"

So that's a no?

"Hage hoonan!"

No it is.  Can't say I'll miss you screeching at me all the time, I wonder who's gonna be the new smarty friend?  Hmmm... You know what?  I bet I know but I'll let it be a surprise for you.  Someday you'll wake up to find a certain fluffy standing on your neck, you'll be too weak to fight that fluffy off.  Then,
you'll start to cry right before it finishes you.  The last thing you'll ever see is a fluffy hoof coming down towards your face.  Sounds like a bad way to die, but its the herd's business, not mine.  See ya around Rain.  Maybe. *click*

"........Mmmmeehhhhhhhh!!!"

Yes Rain?  Something to say?

".......heash"

What's that?

"Heash gih"

I'm not sure what a heash is, Rain.

"PEASH!!!"

Oh!  You actually said it!  Good job Rain, you get some medicine.  Know what?  Before I came in here I never though you'd really say please.  I mean, you've been so strong and proud, defying me, constantly demanding things or trying to escape.  But here we are, you yelling please at the top of your lungs JUST like I wanted you to.  Maybe, just maybe, you can still be a good fluffy after all.

*grind*

Heh, it that your widdle teeth?  If I didn't know better I'd say you wern't grateful for this medicine and all the things I do for you and your herd.  Nah, you're a good fluffy now right?  A good little fluffy that does what she's told.

*death glare*

Oh, scary.  Now open wide and swallow EVERY drop, you'll get medicine every day before sleepies.

"Yay!  Hooman gif med'sin, smawty fwiend be ok!"

"Tank yu, hooman"

"Muh me guh gu hoonan!"

"Wha' smawty say?"

She said good fluffies are nice to humans.  Open Rain.

"Mhhu- kak, kak, geh hic!"

Easy now, swallow it all or you won't get better.

"Muuuhhhhh!   Meeeunhhhh!  uuhhhheehhsss!

It's medicine, it's not supposed to taste good.  Now the rest of you be nice to Rain and remember, she'll be weak and helpless for a while if that means anything to you.  Oh and Rain?  Remember to say please before every dose of medicine, that's what a good fluffy would do.  Well, goodnight all!  *click*

"Tank yu hooman!  Nu wan dawk!  Mnnnnhhhhhhhhh!!!"

That went WAY better than I'd thought!  Glad I grabbed that bottle of red wine vinegar before heading in.  Experiments can wait until tomorrow, after that performance I think someone deserves a drink.