Session Start: Monday, September 22, 2008
Min/Sarah & Sik -- WHO WAS TOUCHING MY CLEANING SUPPLIES??? (gpgsarah@passport.com)
Nanaki (boredjord999@hotmail.com)
(6:41 PM) Nanaki:	...
(6:41 PM)	Min/Sarah & Sik -- WHO WAS TOUCHING MY CLEANING SUPPLIES??? is now Online
Session Start: Monday, September 29, 2008
Wrath (aka Barry the Chopper aka Mins) 8D (gpgsarah@passport.com)
Nanaki (boredjord999@hotmail.com)
Cascade (cascadefruitloop@hotmail.com)
(4:56 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	'ello
(4:56 PM) Cascade:	kay
we all here?
(4:57 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	I'm here <.<
(4:58 PM) Nanaki:	rawr?
(4:58 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	-pop-
(4:58 PM) Cascade:	kays
Doc? Chev?
We all know why we're here this evening, right?
(4:59 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	right >.>
(4:59 PM) Nanaki:	>.>
(4:59 PM) Cascade:	kay
here's how will do it
Doc will start
(4:59 PM) Cascade:	she'll say one thing that bothered her that she never brought up with you, or tried to bring up with you but you wouldn't listen
then you respond
(5:00 PM) Cascade:	then we solve
then Chev, you say one thing that bothered you but you didn't tell Doc, or tried to but she wouldn't listen
(5:00 PM) Cascade:	rinse, repeat
kay?
(5:00 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	kay
(5:00 PM) Cascade:	chev, kay?
(5:01 PM) Nanaki:	yeah
(5:01 PM) Cascade:	kay
Doc? You may begin
(5:02 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	-attempts to not suck at wording for once- something that bothered me a lot was how you'd go off on a tangent about something that I really couldn't contribute to, and even when I was like "D: -confused and stupid-" you'd keep talking about it ._.
(5:03 PM) Cascade:	so you felt kind of helpless and foolish because he was talking about something he knew a lot about, but you knew nothing about?
(5:03 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	-nod-
(5:04 PM) Cascade:	can you think of a specific instance of this?
(5:04 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	erm, most of the time it was Chev talking about military planes, and despite me being the daughter of an air force pilot, I know -nothing- about planes. at all.
(5:05 PM) Cascade:	kay
what do you think could have been done, or could be done to take care of this?
(5:06 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	erm. avoidance of topics that make no sense to me/attempting to make it understandable for the small brain of Mins?
(5:06 PM) Cascade:	that sounds like a good plan
(5:06 PM) Cascade:	and maybe if one of you is talking about something the other really really dosn't understand
(5:07 PM) Cascade:	maybe you can say "Hey, I don't get this at all, this is all greek to me. Can we talk about something else? Or can you explain what you mean in layman's terms?
(5:08 PM) Cascade:	Chev, what do you think?
(5:09 PM) Nanaki:	*shrug* probably...
I'm happy to let Mins continue for now though
(5:09 PM) Cascade:	no, it's your turn
(5:09 PM) Nanaki:	to explain what I didn't like about the relationship, or explain that last point?
(5:10 PM) Cascade:	explainsomething that bothered you
(5:10 PM) Nanaki:	can I ask you a question first though Cas?
(5:10 PM) Cascade:	sure
(5:10 PM) Nanaki:	is the purpose of this chat to find out why it ended, or to get me and Mins back together?
(5:11 PM) Cascade:	neither
(5:11 PM) Nanaki:	...
(5:11 PM) Cascade:	I think we all know why it ended
and if you don't want to get back together than there's nothing that can make you
(5:11 PM) Cascade:	but you both have a bunch of unresolved feelings that are making you stressed
and talking about it will help you guys
(5:12 PM) Cascade:	so
what was something that bothered you?
why don't you tell Doc what you told me?
(5:13 PM) Nanaki:	you mean the reasons I've told everyone a dozen times before? =/
(5:13 PM) Cascade:	sure
why not?
(5:13 PM) Nanaki:	*sigh*
(5:14 PM) Nanaki:	look, the purpose of this chat seems to me like it's to stop Mins being so responsible for everything going wrong
(5:14 PM) Nanaki:	and I've told her it's my fault, I ended it in fact
but I can't make her believe that
(5:14 PM) Cascade:	that's not the purpose
(5:14 PM) Nanaki:	and repeating things I've already told her won't solve things
(5:15 PM) Cascade:	you're so eager to give up before you even try
just say it
(5:15 PM) Nanaki:	no, I'm eager to accept responsibility, because it /was/ my fault
and I want Sarah to see that so she'll stop beating herself up for it ending
(5:16 PM) Cascade:	why do you think it was your fault?
(5:16 PM) Nanaki:	because it all was
one) I jumped into it too early after me and Jinx
(5:16 PM) Nanaki:	two) too early after Min and Dan
(5:16 PM) Cascade:	Is that your opinion or Jinx's opinion?
(5:16 PM) Nanaki:	three) I jumped into it in the wrong state of mind
(5:17 PM) Nanaki:	both
(5:17 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Chev... it had been like 2 months since you and Jinx :/
(5:17 PM) Nanaki:	Mins, please don't try and find fault with Jinx
it's not her fault whats happened
(5:18 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	:/
(5:18 PM) Nanaki:	it's been 4 years since the end of my dad's last relationship, and he's still not over it
things take time to heal, especially things like relationships
(5:19 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	-sigh- I guess I'm weird, then
(5:19 PM) Cascade:	everyone is different, some people take a long time
and for some people it's better to move on wuickly
there are pros and cons to both
(5:20 PM) Cascade:	Chev
you told me you didn't feel good enough for Doc
(5:21 PM) Nanaki:	yeah?
(5:21 PM) Cascade:	but that you never told her that
(5:21 PM) Nanaki:	<.<
(5:21 PM) Cascade:	I'm wondering why she would have stayed with you if she didn't think you were good enough
in fact
(5:21 PM) Nanaki:	I think I've said it said far too many times... >.>
(5:21 PM) Cascade:	the other night Doc described you as the perfect guy for her
(5:22 PM) Cascade:	I'm just thinking
even if you don't think you're good enough for her
she obviously does
(5:23 PM) Cascade:	Doc?
(5:24 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	hm?
(5:24 PM) Cascade:	do you think Chev "isn't good enough" for you?
(5:24 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	hell no D:
(5:25 PM) Cascade:	and now that you're broken up, you can't help but second guess some of the things he said?
like, you wonder if he really meant them?
(5:25 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	._.
(5:25 PM) Cascade:	like
(5:26 PM) Cascade:	you were saying the other night that you weren't sure if he meant the things he said to you during your relationship
I think now's a good time to ask if he did
(5:26 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	yeah... :/
(5:26 PM) Nanaki:	you know what?
thank you both guys
(5:27 PM) Cascade:	giving up?
(5:27 PM) Nanaki:	as if my life isn't bad enough without this
thank you for backing me into a corner where I lose whatever I say
(5:27 PM) Cascade:	I don't recall ever backing anyone up into a corner
in fact
I think I've been pretty fair in distributing "blame" to both of you
(5:27 PM) Nanaki:	and for not having the enough respect to let things lie and accept my opinion
I've explained myself a lot
(5:27 PM) Cascade:	not that blame is the word I want to use, but I can't think of the correcvt one
(5:27 PM) Nanaki:	to far too many people
(5:28 PM) Nanaki:	no, let me talk
why are you doing this Cas?
(5:29 PM) Nanaki:	it's not to fix things, it's not to get things explained
it's not to help me or Mins
why?
(5:29 PM) Cascade:	It is
You think I'm doing this for my own personal amusement?
(5:29 PM) Cascade:	I'm not that terrible a person
at least, I'd like to think not
(5:30 PM) Nanaki:	*sigh* you know what?
(5:30 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	guys, stop. :/ I'm the one who felt like I hadn't gotten the whole explaination.
(5:30 PM) Nanaki:	I'll take all the blame
I'm an asshole
(5:30 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Chev, no
(5:30 PM) Nanaki:	I mess things up
*messed
I rushed into things
(5:30 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	I'm the one who's fucking everything up
(5:30 PM) Cascade:	so
you're both wrong
(5:30 PM) Nanaki:	I'm the dickhead who doesn't know when to shut up
(5:30 PM) Cascade:	I think you both messed up
(5:31 PM) Nanaki:	*facedesk*
(5:31 PM) Cascade:	you both did things that built up to your breaking up, and neither one of you is innocent
then again, neither one of you is guilty
(5:31 PM) Nanaki:	*sigh*
(5:32 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Cas, I think you should relinquish the title of Doc back to me >.>
.. actually
(5:32 PM) Cascade:	I know
but it kind of bothers me
(5:32 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	no, I don't think even I should be Doc
(5:32 PM) Cascade:	how both of you are trying to take all of the blame
(5:32 PM) Cascade:	and it's making you angrier at each other than it would be if you would just say "Yeah, this is partially your fault"
like
(5:33 PM) Cascade:	it's all "I did this, I did that, this is my fault"
instead of "Yeah, I messed up here, but you should have done this too"
(5:33 PM) Nanaki:	*sigh*
(5:34 PM) Nanaki:	I don't want to do this
(5:34 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	and neither do I, anymore
it's not helping
(5:34 PM) Nanaki:	all it seems like is you both don't care respect my decision on this
(5:34 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Chev, I do care and respect it
(5:35 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	I just... I'm being idiotic and screwing everything up
(5:35 PM) Nanaki:	there's nothing to screw up though
(5:35 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	I'm screwing up our friendship
(5:36 PM) Nanaki:	still there Cas?
(5:36 PM) Cascade:	mmhm
I'm thinking
(5:37 PM) Cascade:	maybe I think too much
(5:37 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	thinking is bad >.>
(5:37 PM) Nanaki:	just forget it guys
I don't want to be part of this conversation anymore
(5:37 PM) Cascade:	I thinki it's good, since without thought all there is left is impulse, but you can have too much of a good thing and all that
(5:38 PM) Cascade:	I don't think it really even can be classified as "conversation" now
(5:38 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	before you go, Chev... I'm sorry for being a bitch about this. I need to shut up and get over it. v.v
(5:38 PM) Nanaki:	*shrug*
I don't really care
(5:39 PM) Nanaki:	I'm not even sure what I think of you at the moment
(5:39 PM) Cascade:	who, me?
(5:39 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	no
me
(5:39 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Chev, you can hate me if you want. I think I deserve it.
(5:39 PM) Nanaki:	both of you, actually
Cas, please think before you say things in future
(5:39 PM) Cascade:	kay
I will
(5:40 PM) Nanaki:	some of the comments you made came off as very snide towards me
(5:40 PM) Cascade:	but that means you have to too
(5:40 PM) Nanaki:	and Mins...
I don't even know
(5:40 PM) Cascade:	I never meant anything to be snide, just so you know
(5:40 PM) Nanaki:	I thought you'd respect my decision to end it
(5:40 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	I do respect it
(5:40 PM) Nanaki:	and ever since I've been talking to Dan...
I just don't get it >.<
you both...
*sigh*
you both seem like great people
(5:41 PM) Nanaki:	but when you get the opinion of the other from either of you
it's just all hate =/
and it's making me wonder what I really know of you...
(5:42 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Chev, I can swear that I have always acted like exactly who I am, or who I perceive myself to be
(5:43 PM) Nanaki:	*sigh*
I don't know if I want to talk to either of you right now...
(5:44 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	if you want, I'll leave you alone...
(5:44 PM) Nanaki:	probably best the neither of us talk to each other right now anyway...
(5:44 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	alright...
(5:45 PM) Cascade:	mm
this is
not too good
(5:46 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	Cas
no
(5:46 PM) Cascade:	no, not like
any of you
like
myself
(5:46 PM) Cascade:	I was so sure if I just got you two together to talk it out everything would turn out good
but
(5:47 PM) Cascade:	it seems I've done more harm than good
(5:47 PM) Nanaki:	forget it
you're forgiven
(5:47 PM) Nanaki:	you're intentions were good
it just didn't quite work out
(5:47 PM) Cascade:	that's nice to hear
but it still dosn't sit well with me
entirely
(5:48 PM) Cascade:	although I'm afraid if I try to make it up to you guys something REALLY bad will happen >>;
(5:48 PM) Nanaki:	people don't enjoy being forgiven for things they feel is their fault
but it wasn't
it was a mistake
mistakes are different to purposefully trying to hurt people
(5:49 PM) Cascade:	I'm thinking about WWM right now
(5:49 PM) Nanaki:	so really, forget it
(5:49 PM) Cascade:	it feels kind of personaified to me right now
(5:49 PM) Nanaki:	you're forgiven completely
(5:49 PM) Cascade:	don't you think? Like
if WWM had never existed and we'd all never met
I wonder what our lives would be like today
(5:50 PM) Cascade:	better or worse do you think?
(5:50 PM) Nanaki:	I'd be dead
(5:50 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	for me? worse. because it's only because of the friends I made on there that I made it through a good 2 years of hell :/
(5:50 PM) Nanaki:	another year like that and I would've killed myself, thats for sure
(5:50 PM) Cascade:	mm
worse for me too
(5:51 PM) Nanaki:	for me, better, I guess
(5:51 PM) Cascade:	since I wouldn't have been able to become close to anyone like I have with you guys
(5:51 PM) Nanaki:	I'd be dead, and unable to hurt anyone
(5:51 PM) Cascade:	you know Chev
(5:51 PM) Cascade:	in these, what?
4 years?
3?
(5:51 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	3 1/2 >.>
(5:51 PM) Cascade:	I don't think I've ever been hurt by you Chev
like
really hurt
I mean yeah we've fought a lot over a bunch of dumb stuff
(5:52 PM) Cascade:	but I don't recall ever feeling half the hurt from you that I've experienced from other people
(5:53 PM) Nanaki:	well, in my life I've already pushed two people to wanting to kill themselves
so looks like you got off lucky
(5:53 PM) Wrath (aka Barry:	pretty much the same for me, Chev. =/
(5:53 PM) Cascade:	lol
(5:54 PM) Cascade:	I probably hurt people so much more with my little passing remarks then you ever could purposfully
(5:54 PM) Nanaki:	you think so?
you know, there's a downside to being so empathetic
you know /exactly/ how to hurt them
really...
*sigh*
(5:55 PM) Cascade:	and I have no idea how or why
I mean
just a week ago
(5:55 PM) Cascade:	I said something that I didn't understand how anyone could be hurt by
but she got really sad
and everyone got mad at me and I didn't understand why
(5:56 PM) Cascade:	and I felt so backed into a corner that I said something else as a joke to try and relieve some of the tension
and that got more people mad at me
(5:56 PM) Cascade:	I can't, like
be serious in real life
(5:57 PM) Cascade:	it's impossible for me, I always end up making these innapropriate jokes
or hiding from the situation alltogether
(5:57 PM) Nanaki:	Cas?
(5:57 PM) Cascade:	and I think I've done that to you guys too
(5:57 PM) Nanaki:	please stop
you're not a bad person
(5:57 PM) Cascade:	I know I'm not
(5:57 PM) Nanaki:	everyone makes mistakes
(5:57 PM) Nanaki:	and it's not your fault how people react to what you say
(5:57 PM) Cascade:	that dosn't mean I can't feel bad about making them
like
when we had this huge fight over
what was it even?
me losing my last baby tooth?
(5:58 PM) Cascade:	I seriously thinkk that's what it was
and we didn't talk for months
(5:58 PM) Cascade:	I really should have just said "you know what? I'm sorry."
(5:59 PM) Cascade:	even though you were a jerk too
(6:00 PM) Cascade:	you know?
(6:00 PM) Nanaki:	anyway...
I have to go
(6:00 PM) Cascade:	oh my god
are you seriously going to write off everything I just said?
(6:01 PM) Nanaki:	no, I'm gonna go cause I have to <.<
(6:01 PM) Cascade:	oi
I guess
(6:01 PM) Cascade:	we can cross off "talk about it" in the list of things to do to solve a problem then
since this was clearly a disaster of epic proportions
(6:02 PM) Cascade:	did anyone gain anything?
like, at all?
(6:02 PM) Nanaki:	*shrug*
anyway, I really have to go
see you guys whenever I do...
(6:02 PM) Cascade:	yeah
I'm gonna go too I think
I'm all worked up now
(6:03 PM) Nanaki:	bye...
(6:03 PM) Cascade:	bye
bye Doc
(6:03 PM)	Nanaki is now Offline