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Artemis- Climbing Over Train

Feb 25th, 2026
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  1. Artemis’s breath came short, crystallizing in front of his face,
  2. blurring his vision. The train had drawn level now, steel wheels spewing
  3. ice and sparks into the air.
  4. “Second carriage,” panted Holly. “There’s a runner. Mind your
  5. footing.”
  6. Runner? Artemis glanced behind. The second carriage was coming
  7. up fast. But the noise was blurring his vision. Was that possible? It was
  8. terrific. Unbearable. There, below the steel doors. A narrow board. Wide
  9. enough to stand on. Barely.
  10. Holly alighted easily, flattening herself against the carriage wall. She
  11. made it look so effortless. A simple skip, and she was safe from those
  12. pulverizing wheels.
  13. “ ome on, Fowl,” shouted Holly. “Jump.”
  14. Artemis tried, he really did. But the toe of his loafer snagged on a
  15. sleeper. He stumbled forward, pinwheeling for balance. A painful death
  16. came rushing up to meet him.
  17. “Two left feet,” muttered Holly, grabbing her least favorite Mud Boy
  18. by the collar. Momentum swung Artemis forward, slamming him into the
  19. door.
  20. …
  21.  
  22. Artemis latched on to the rung beside her.
  23. “What can I do?”
  24. She nodded at a shoulder pocket.
  25. “In there. A small vial. Take it out.”
  26. Artemis ripped open the Velcro flap, pulling out a tiny spray bottle.
  27. “Okay. ot it.”
  28. “ ood. It’s up to you now, Fowl. Up and over.”
  29. Artemis’s mouth dropped open. “Up and . . .”
  30. “Yes. It’s our only hope. We have to get this door open to reel in
  31. Butler and the ommander. There’s a bend in the track two klicks back. If
  32. this train slows down even one revolution, they’re gone.”
  33. Artemis nodded. “The vial?”
  34. “Acid. For the lock. The mechanism is on the inside. over your face
  35. and squeeze. ive it the whole tube. Don’t get any on yourself.”
  36. It was a long conversation under the circumstances. Especially since
  37. every second was a vital one. Artemis did not waste another one on good
  38. byes.
  39. He dragged himself to the next rung, keeping the length of his body
  40. pressed close to the carriage. The wind was whipping along the length of
  41. the train, tiny motes of ice in every gust. They stung like bees.
  42. Nevertheless Artemis pulled his gloves off with chattering teeth. Better
  43. frostbite than being crushed beneath the wheels.
  44. Upward. One rung at a time, until his head poked above the carriage.
  45. Every shred of shelter was now gone. The air pounded his forehead,
  46. forcing itself down his throat. Artemis squinted through the blizzard, along
  47. the carriage’s roof. There! In the center. A skylight. Across a desert of
  48. steel, blasted smooth as glass by the elements. Not a handhold within
  49. fifteen feet. The strength of a rhino would be of no use here, Artemis
  50. decided. At last an opportunity to use his brain. Kinetics and momentum.
  51. Simple enough, in theory.
  52. Keeping to the front rim of the carriage, Artemis inched onto the
  53. roof. The wind wormed beneath his legs rising them nearly an inch from
  54. the deck, threatening to float him off the train.
  55. Artemis curled his fingers around the rim. These were not gripping
  56. fingers. Artemis hadn’t gripped anything bigger than his cell phone in
  57. several months. If you wanted someone to type Paradise Lost in under
  58. twenty minutes, then Artemis was your man. But as for hanging onto
  59. carriage roofs in a blizzard, dead loss. Which, fortunately, was all part of
  60. the plan.
  61. A millisecond before his finger joints parted company, Artemis let
  62. go. The slipstream shot him straight into the skylight’s metal housing.
  63. Perfect, he would have grunted had there been a cubic centimeter of
  64. air in his lungs. But even if he had said it, the wind would have snatched
  65. away any words before his own ears heard them. He had moments now
  66. before the wind dug its fingers beneath his torso flipping him onto the icy
  67. steppe. annon fodder for the goblins.
  68. Artemis fumbled the acid vial from his pocket, snapping the top
  69. between his teeth. A fleck of the acid flew past his eye. No time to worry
  70. about that now. No time for anything.
  71. The skylight was secured by a thick padlock. Artemis dribbled two
  72. drops into the keyhole. All he could spare. It would have to be enough.
  73. The effect was immediate. The acid ate through the metal like lava
  74. through ice. Fairy technology. Best under the world.
  75. The padlock pinged open, exposing the hatch to the wind’s power.
  76. The hatch flipped upward, and Artemis tumbled through onto a pallet of
  77. barrels. Not exactly the picture of a gallant rescuer.
  78.  
  79. -The Arctic Incident, Chapter 8
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