Evilsteady Session 24

[18:52] <!DM-sama> You guys load up early in the morning to go draygin hunting.... and you don't want to fight a tribe of trolls at night.
[18:52] <Belor_> Making sure you are here~
[18:52] <Sazir> Was I able to make any Golems the night before?
[18:52] <!DM-sama> How do you intend to find the dragon?
[18:52] <!DM-sama> It takes weeks to make a golem.
[18:53] <Sazir> Ah damn
[18:53] <!DM-sama> And a sizable gold investment.
[18:53] <Sazir> Also, didn't Jiggly find out his position?
[18:53] <Sazir> If not, we'll attack the troll clan and find out from them
[18:53] <!DM-sama> You can make them when you get a permanent residence.
[18:53] <Sazir> Right on
[18:53] <Belor_> >us
[18:53] <!DM-sama> She knows he's got a cave in the mountains overlooking the plain.
[18:53] <Belor_> >permanent residence
[18:53] <!DM-sama> That's it.
[18:53] <!DM-sama> All mages need a workshop Belor.
[18:53] <!DM-sama> Even you.
[18:54] <!DM-sama> It's typically a level 15ish thing anyway.
[18:54] <@Malakai> We will eventually find a place and settle it via wanton murder and destruction
[18:54] <Sazir> Indeed
[18:54] <Sazir> IN ANY CASE
[18:55] <Sazir> We'll go to the cave and lay waste to the troll clan that serves him
[18:55] <Sazir> One of them probably knows where he is
[18:55] <!DM-sama> ..... You've never fought trolls have you?
[18:55] <Sazir> I have not, no.
[18:55] <@Imouto> They regenerate..
[18:55] <Sazir> ...Ah
[18:55] <Belor_> A place to call my own....sounds nice and trolls are hard as fuck to beat.
[18:55] <Lash> Cookin' em is usually on the agenda.
[18:56]  * Lash coughs
[18:56] <!DM-sama> I'll tell you this now, imagine an army of stoned jamaican pro atheletes with regeneration and darkvision.
[18:56] <Lash> Just uh, throwing that out there.
[18:56] <Sazir> ....Even against a plague army of zombies?
[18:56] <!DM-sama> They'll have zombies too.
[18:56] <Lash> You don't fuck with Jamaicans mang.
[18:56] <Sazir> ZOMBIE BATTLE
[18:56] <!DM-sama> They INVENTED primal necromancy.
[18:56] <@Malakai> We can handle
[18:57] <Sazir> Alright, so we might not exacly lay waste to the troll clan, but going there, to the cave, is probably something we have to do anyway.
[18:57] <!DM-sama> The version you use is a polluted demonic variation, but troll witchdoctors have been making zombies for a LONG time.
[18:57] <Sazir> ...Maybe we can take control of it...well lets see.
[18:57] <Sazir> Aaah
[18:57] <Lash> Man what the fuck
[18:57] <Lash> Why can't we just like, get a dealer and chill for the night there before fighting scalybutt
[18:57] <Lash> Then after we rest a night, we hunt.
[18:57] <!DM-sama> Because Dragondick OP and the troll chief is a woman.
[18:57] <@Malakai> We've already rested a night you stoner
[18:58] <Vripe> sounds good
[18:58] <Sazir> >Troll chief is a woman
[18:58] <Sazir> She wouldn't have a liking to humans with charisma 23 would she?
[18:58] <@Malakai> lol
[18:58] <!DM-sama> She's more fond of dragons with charisma 26
[18:58] <Sazir> DAMN
[18:58] <Vripe> can we convince her Sazir is a dragon
[18:59] <Sazir> You probably can
[18:59] <!DM-sama> She also has a fetish for things that could actually kill her... and his BW could one shot her because fire damage doesn't regen.
[18:59] <!DM-sama> Same with acid FYI
[18:59] <Belor_> I bet she is more tasty to snake ladies with hungry bellies.
[18:59] <Vripe> oh, acid
[18:59] <!DM-sama> This is common knowledge to adventurers.
[18:59] <Sazir> What about negative energy things like Slay Living?
[18:59] <!DM-sama> If she fails the fort save, which is VERY unlikely, then yes she would die.
[19:00] <Sazir> IN ANY CASE! I think the agreed course of action
[19:00] <Sazir> Is go to the cave and then see where he is
[19:00] <!DM-sama> So be it.
[19:02] <!DM-sama> Your cart leaves the city, uninterrupted this time, and travels across the plains toward the mountains.
[19:02] <!DM-sama> Who wants to roll random encounters?
[19:03] <!DM-sama> Also Lash is in the back of the cart, and none of you have actually spoken to her.
[19:03] <!DM-sama> At all.
[19:03] <Belor_> Oh me me!
[19:03] <!DM-sama> She's just there.
[19:03] <Vripe> cool
[19:03] <!DM-sama> d6
[19:03] <!DM-sama> 3 times.
[19:03] <@Malakai> "So....I take it you're just...coming with us now?"
[19:03] <Belor_> Roll 1d6
[19:03] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d6 --> [ 1d6=3 ]{3}
[19:03] <Belor_> Roll 1d6
[19:03] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d6 --> [ 1d6=3 ]{3}
[19:03] <Belor_> Roll 1d6
[19:03] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d6 --> [ 1d6=2 ]{2}
[19:03] <Lash> "..Yeah pretty much."
[19:03] <!DM-sama> you travel for a full day, and nothing interesting happens.
[19:03] <!DM-sama> Night falls, what do?
[19:03] <@Malakai> "....Have you even told us your name yet?"
[19:04] <Lash> "...Nope"
[19:04] <Vripe> "What, is your birthday CAKE in the next town or something?"
[19:04] <@Malakai> "Well, out with it."
[19:04]  * Lash pulls a small piece of cake from her pouch and looks at Vripe stone-faced. 'No, this is.' She keeps staring as she eats the piece of cake.
[19:04] <Sazir> "Just who are you stranger? Ah, are you perhaps a follower of our lord?"
[19:04]  * Vripe falls to his knees
[19:05] <!DM-sama> Time out: I need to share something, there are like 50 ladybugs in my room for some reason, despite the fact there's no way in it from outside.
[19:05] <!DM-sama> I'm magic.
[19:05] <Vripe> holy crap
[19:05] <!DM-sama> Also the one on my finger right now has no spots.
[19:05] <Sazir> Woah
[19:05] <!DM-sama> and it's just letting my type without flying away.
[19:05] <Sazir> That's kinda awesome
[19:05] <Vripe> now you'll have to be careful with every movement so you don't smash any
[19:07] <@Malakai> "....Your name...what is it?"
[19:07] <Lash> "Not important"
[19:08] <Sazir> "Oh I think it is mysterious lady, after all you maybe one of our many many enemies."
[19:08] <@Malakai> ".....either tell me your name, or I kick your ass out of our cart."
[19:08] <Sazir> "Such is the trouble with being the messengers of slaughter."
[19:08] <Lash> "Lash, like the one you took dealing with the bitch who took my present."
[19:08] <Belor_> "If she helps complete our goals then what does it matter if we know her name?"
[19:08]  * Lash nudges her foot towards Malakai's butt. "From the rogue, here."
[19:09] <@Malakai> "...Can I kick her out of the cart?"
[19:09] <Belor_> "Can I light you on fire?"
[19:09] <@Malakai> "I'll stab you Belor."
[19:09] <Vripe> "Can I have some cake?"
[19:09] <Lash> "You can try to kick me out."
[19:09]  * Lash smiles
[19:09] <Sazir> "If you must friendly heretic. Though her usefulness in battle did prove useful...so if she wants to come with us to spread the lord's word then let her."
[19:10] <@Malakai> "Fine."
[19:10] <Sazir> "And you so much as come close to my friend, and I'll let my girls have their way with you which I'll then turn your body into a girl and have my way with it." He says with a smile.
[19:10]  * Malakai settles down in the back of the cart, and gives Sazir an emotionless stare
[19:10] <Lash> "...Oh my. Oh my my my."
[19:11] <!DM-sama> It's night.
[19:11] <!DM-sama> Will you keep going or rest here?
[19:11] <Sazir> Rest
[19:11] <!DM-sama> d4
[19:11] <!DM-sama> 3 times.
[19:11] <Sazir> roll 1d4
[19:11] <!DM-sama> Sazir rolled : 1d4 --> [ 1d4=4 ]{4}
[19:11] <!DM-sama> No wiat.
[19:11] <Belor_> Roll 1d4
[19:11] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d4 --> [ 1d4=3 ]{3}
[19:11] <!DM-sama> Just onc- WELP
[19:12] <!DM-sama> ONE WAS ENOUGH
[19:12] <Sazir> I think I rolled either something amazing or horrible
[19:12] <!DM-sama> You set up camp and begin camping out on the planes.
[19:12] <!DM-sama> roll 1d20
[19:12] <Belor_> Roll 1d20
[19:12] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d20 --> [ 1d20=1 ]{1}
[19:12] <!DM-sama> ...............................................
[19:13] <@Malakai> ......................................
[19:13] <!DM-sama> roll 1d100
[19:13] <Vripe> ahahahahaha
[19:13] <Belor_> Roll 1d100
[19:13] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d100 --> [ 1d100=21 ]{21}
[19:14] <!DM-sama> As you sit around the fire planning what you'll do tomorrow you hear.... thunder?
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Make a listen check.
[19:14] <@Malakai> all?
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Yep.
[19:14] <Sazir> roll 1d20+4 OH GOD
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Sazir rolled : 1d20+4 OH GOD --> [ 1d20=8 ]{12}
[19:14] <Belor_> Roll 1d20+5
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=14 ]{19}
[19:14] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+2 oh boy here we go...
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+2 oh boy here we go... --> [ 1d20=10 ]{12}
[19:14] <Lash> roll 1d20+3
[19:14] <!DM-sama> Lash rolled : 1d20+3 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{14}
[19:15] <Vripe> roll 1d20+17
[19:15] <!DM-sama> Vripe rolled : 1d20+17 --> [ 1d20=3 ]{20}
[19:15] <!DM-sama> Thank you based rogue.
[19:15] <!DM-sama> It's not thunder, the sounds of clashing steel can be heard amonst the rolling thunder of hooves and the pounding of the drums of war.
[19:15] <Belor_> Vripe saves the day again...I think
[19:16] <Vripe> the day hasn't started
[19:16] <!DM-sama> It sound slike the trolls are attacking a settlement a couple miles north east of your location, you can see the light of the burning village from here.
[19:16] <Vripe> does that mean their base is understaffed?
[19:17] <Sazir> "Oh my, my...I do believe I can almost hear the screams of joy at being set free from life. Oooh so many lovelies to be made from there. Want to check it out, old friend?"
[19:17] <!DM-sama> You don't even know the exact location of their base, but probably.
[19:17] <Vripe> if only we had magic elf bitch
[19:17] <Sazir> If only
[19:17] <Vripe> she knows everything
[19:17] <Sazir> Maybe one day Ants
[19:18] <Belor_> "Well this would give us the perfect chance to get what we need from some silly trolls"
[19:18] <Sazir> "Indeed, then shall we?"
[19:18] <Belor_> "...let us go hunting"
[19:19]  * Sazir brandishes Slitherbite and hums to himself as he walks to the burning town.
[19:20] <!DM-sama> As you approach the sounds of fighting become more apparent, the villagers are trying their best to defend themselves from the troll assault.
[19:20] <Vripe> maybe I'll watch our stuff
[19:20] <!DM-sama> The women and children are being gathered in the town center as the men are mercilessly killed.
[19:21] <!DM-sama> Trolls patrol the edge of the village to not allow anyone to escape.
[19:21] <!DM-sama> The trolls in question are the first you encounter, wearing feathered headdresses and riding on...... big chickens.
[19:22] <!DM-sama> Not quite, the creatues have very large, sharp looking beaks.
[19:22] <@Malakai> "Well, Sazir, all these lambs to the slaughter...I don't think you want them to go to the wrong god, right?"
[19:22] <Vripe> BETTER NOT BE BLACK CHOCOBOS
[19:22]  * Malakai flashes a sly smile at Sazir
[19:22] <Sazir> "Of course not friendly heretic, lets show them how to truly make a festival of death shall we?"
[19:22] <@Malakai> "Indeed"
[19:23] <@Malakai> "As a matter of fact, I have an idea."
[19:23] <Sazir> "And what would that be?"
[19:23] <@Malakai> "Vripe, can you scout ahead and try to get a general idea of their positioning? I think we can put my new cloak to use...."
[19:23] <@Malakai> "Let us show these wildmen the meaning of fear."
[19:24] <Vripe> cool
[19:24] <Sazir> (I am FEAR, I AM THE NIGHT, I! AM! BATMAWN)
[19:24] <Vripe> do I roll for this?
[19:24] <@Malakai> (Well, let's be real, if a flying berserker landed in the middle of you and your friends and started chopping you up, wouldn't you shit your pants?)
[19:24] <@Malakai> probably "stealth" I assume
[19:24] <!DM-sama> Yeah, hide and move silently.
[19:24] <Vripe> or do I just move silentl- yeah
[19:24] <!DM-sama> If they're the same just roll once.
[19:25] <Vripe> roll 1d18
[19:25] <!DM-sama> Vripe rolled : 1d18 --> [ 1d18=14 ]{14}
[19:25] <Vripe> whoops
[19:25] <@Malakai> what
[19:25] <Vripe> roll 1d20+18
[19:25] <!DM-sama> Vripe rolled : 1d20+18 --> [ 1d20=4 ]{22}
[19:26] <@Malakai> was that move silently or hid?
[19:26] <@Malakai> *hide
[19:26] <Belor_> both
[19:26] <!DM-sama> Alright, you sneak past the perimeter guards and into the burning town.
[19:26] <Vripe> that was both
[19:26] <@Malakai> ah
[19:27] <!DM-sama> Within you see the villagers being rounded up like cattle and all the loot taken from the burning buildings before it gets damaged.
[19:27] <!DM-sama> They're gathering it into a pile near the town center.
[19:27] <!DM-sama> Near that, the women and children are corralled together by trolls with spears.
[19:27]  * Sazir casts Spectral Hands with [Persistent Spell] fused into it. The two ghostly hands float above him. "Oh the fun we'll have~"
[19:28] <!DM-sama> Most of the trolls look similar except for the sole woman among them, on her back is a massive bloody axe, ornately designed and razor sharp.
[19:28] <!DM-sama> She wears red chainmail and her hands are armored in gauntlets that appear to be on fire.
[19:30] <!DM-sama> She has long red hair in dreadlocks and short tusks that would probably be cute if you weren't sure she could cleave you in half.
[19:30] <!DM-sama> She circles the victems and the loot as if waiting for something, occassionally she glances towards the sky.
[19:30] <Vripe> oh fuck
[19:31] <!DM-sama> You estimate the total number of trolls to be around 50, plus the chief.
[19:32] <!DM-sama> That's all you got.
[19:32] <!DM-sama> I assume you head back?
[19:32] <@Malakai> ....
[19:32] <@Malakai> I just got an even more devilish idea....
[19:32] <Vripe> if that's AWAY from this, then hell yes
[19:32] <@Malakai> so vripe comes back to us and tells us the situation I assume?
[19:33] <!DM-sama> Yep.
[19:33] <!DM-sama> I's mostly.
[19:33] <!DM-sama> "We're boned, let's go home."
[19:33] <@Malakai> Emmy.....could I use my net in combination with my flight to, say,....scoop someone up mid flight and keep going..?
[19:33] <Vripe> I'll at least watch where they go home to
[19:33] <!DM-sama> Maybe.
[19:33] <@Malakai> A snake is nowhere near as dangerous without the head
[19:34] <@Malakai> Sazir, you see where I'm going with this?
[19:34] <!DM-sama> You take -4 to hit from the air without aerial combat.
[19:34] <@Malakai> what do you guys think? should I attempt it?
[19:34] <Vripe> well, something might scoop YOU up
[19:35] <Vripe> do you trust the dice gods?
[19:35] <@Malakai> Crit bros Vripe
[19:35] <@Malakai> Crit bros
[19:35] <Sazir> DO ET
[19:35] <@Malakai> I want Sazir , Belor , and Lash's opinion first
[19:35] <Belor_> Sure, why not.
[19:35] <@Malakai> there's 2
[19:35] <@Malakai> Lash?
[19:36] <Belor_> But
[19:36] <@Malakai> but?
[19:36] <Belor_> I think we should try taking out the patrols first.
[19:36] <Sazir> Especially if they're near the dead bodies
[19:36] <@Malakai> Well
[19:36] <@Malakai> What we COULD do
[19:36] <@Malakai> is while I do this
[19:36] <@Malakai> you guys take out the patrols
[19:36] <Belor_> Because if you fail
[19:36] <@Malakai> does that sound good?
[19:36] <Belor_> That is 50 trolls coming after us.
[19:37] <@Malakai> Damn man
[19:37] <@Malakai> this is intense
[19:37] <Vripe> and something that doesn't need a cape to fly
[19:37] <Belor_> 3 mages and a rouge against trolls?
[19:37] <Belor_> Sure.
[19:37] <@Malakai> I think you guys can handle
[19:37] <@Malakai> you're all rape tier at this point
[19:37] <@Malakai> also
[19:37] <@Malakai> you're forgetting
[19:37] <@Malakai> Sazir's lovelies
[19:38] <@Malakai> 3 Mages, a Rogue, and 2 undead rape trains
[19:38] <Sazir> So it's more 3 mages + two undead bitches + 1 rogue
[19:38] <!DM-sama> You also have an AoE nuke specialist now.
[19:38] <@Malakai> ^
[19:38] <!DM-sama> That shits fire damage.
[19:38] <Belor_> My point is we take out the patrols "before" you do your flying stuff.
[19:39] <@Malakai> I see your point, but if I do it WHILE you guys take out the patrols, the alarm will make them even easier to handle, especially if it all goes according to plan
[19:39] <@Malakai> see what I mean?>
[19:39] <Sazir> Well
[19:39] <@Malakai> And if I miss, I abandon the net, and fly out, and you guys STILL take out some of the patrol
[19:39] <Sazir> If Sazir can reach ONE dead body
[19:39] <Sazir> Then it's on
[19:39] <@Malakai> exactly
[19:39] <@Malakai> if Vripe guts ONE dude, and sazir is next to him
[19:39] <@Malakai> It starts a chain reaction
[19:39] <Sazir> Man, too bad I'm not level 11 yet
[19:40] <Sazir> Then I can just do ACID FOG
[19:40] <@Malakai> we're so close
[19:40] <@Malakai> lol
[19:40] <@Malakai> I say we go for it
[19:40] <Sazir> Well, do what you gotta do!
[19:40] <!DM-sama> So are you going or what?
[19:40] <@Malakai> Ok Emmy, what do I need to do for this?
[19:40] <!DM-sama> FLY
[19:40] <!DM-sama> YOU FOOL
[19:40] <@Malakai> pffft
[19:41] <@Malakai> "Wish me luck"
[19:41] <Vripe> IT'S NOT FLYING
[19:41] <!DM-sama> You take flight into the darkness above the burning village.
[19:41] <Vripe> IT'S FALLING
[19:41] <Vripe> WITH STYLE
[19:41]  * Malakai takes off with a pat on Vripe and Sazir's back
[19:41] <!DM-sama> Your cloak becomes large batlike wings and propels you clumsily through the air.
[19:41] <!DM-sama> You circle over the center of the town.
[19:42] <!DM-sama> Make a spot check.
[19:42] <@Malakai> k
[19:42] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+2
[19:42] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+2 --> [ 1d20=8 ]{10}
[19:42] <!DM-sama> You see the red headed troll woman you're after.
[19:42] <!DM-sama> Roll to hit with the net.
[19:42] <!DM-sama> -4
[19:42] <!DM-sama> You're doing a flyby snatch and grab.
[19:43] <@Malakai> so it's 1d20+12 instead of 16. right?
[19:43] <!DM-sama> Yes.
[19:43] <@Malakai> kk
[19:43] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+12 dice gods pls
[19:43] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+12 dice gods pls --> [ 1d20=17 ]{29}
[19:43] <Vripe> ohhhhhhhh
[19:43] <@Malakai> I just
[19:43] <Belor_> Oh my~
[19:43] <@Malakai> sighed
[19:43] <@Malakai> out loud
[19:43] <!DM-sama> The net sliangs down and wraps around the woman.
[19:44] <!DM-sama> Almost immediately a horn sounds from a nearby warrior and the patrol units move in.
[19:44] <!DM-sama> Now.
[19:44] <@Malakai> (Now it's their turn....)
[19:44] <!DM-sama> You guys can attack in a moment.
[19:44] <!DM-sama> Not quite onii.
[19:44] <!DM-sama> You can't pull her up.
[19:45] <!DM-sama> You look down and see that someone has grabbed the return rope on the net.
[19:45] <!DM-sama> Someone you failed to notice before.
[19:45] <!DM-sama> A human man with long red hair and flamboyant red dress, his boots are a gaudy silver.
[19:45] <!DM-sama> With a single hand he easily overcomes all the upward force of your wings.
[19:46] <!DM-sama> He looks up at you with a smile and his red reptilian eyes send a shiver down your spine.
[19:46] <!DM-sama> Make a will save.
[19:46] <!DM-sama> Twice.
[19:46] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+5
[19:46] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=9 ]{14}
[19:46] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+5
[19:46] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=7 ]{12}
[19:46] <Sazir> WELP
[19:46] <!DM-sama> You failed both.
[19:46] <Sazir> That's what you get
[19:46] <Sazir> For trying to be BATMAWN
[19:47] <!DM-sama> You're panicked, and can do nothing but attempt to flee for one round, causing you to drop the net.
[19:47] <@Malakai> worth a shot
[19:47] <!DM-sama> As you attempt to turn your body siezes up and you plumet from the sky.
[19:47] <!DM-sama> you take 4d6 falling damage.
[19:47] <@Malakai> roll 4d6
[19:47] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 4d6 --> [ 4d6=20 ]{20}
[19:48] <Belor_> This is why crazy plans are called "crazy"
[19:48] <@Malakai> it's okay
[19:48] <@Malakai> I'm used to dying
[19:48] <!DM-sama> As you impact the ground you turn your head, but even that is difficult as the "man" walks slowly toward you.
[19:48] <!DM-sama> You see the troll woman in the background blushing furiously as she attempts to untangle herself from the net she was so easily caught by.
[19:49] <!DM-sama> The "man" looks down at you.
[19:49] <!DM-sama> His voice is soft and gentle, it makes you feel a little sick.
[19:49] <!DM-sama> "I wonder.... how many friends did you bring with you for this little scheme?"
[19:49] <!DM-sama> Make a will save.
[19:50] <@Malakai> roll 1d20+5
[19:50] <!DM-sama> Malakai rolled : 1d20+5 --> [ 1d20=15 ]{20}
[19:50] <@Malakai> (Can I speak back at him or am I too shaken?)
[19:50] <!DM-sama> Your mouth opens to answer his question truthfully, but you clench your teeth hard enough to draw blood and force yourself to look away from him.
[19:50] <!DM-sama> You're under some kind of enchantment used for interrogation.
[19:51] <!DM-sama> Your body is compelled to answer him truthfully, but you resisted it.
[19:51] <!DM-sama> "How noble...." He says with a wide grin revealing his sharp teeth.
[19:52] <!DM-sama> "Kill everyone." he says as the flames of the village swirl behind him. "The women and children too."
[19:52] <!DM-sama> That's the last thing you hear before a single kick from the man sends you hurdling through the air and into a pile of hot charcoal left over from what was once a barn.
[19:53] <!DM-sama> You black out from the rediculous force of the impact, as the sounds of women begging for mercy as their children are disemboweled in front of them fill the night sky.
[19:53] <!DM-sama> Meanwhile.
[19:54] <!DM-sama> The sounding of the horn draws the guards attention and they begin running toward the village.
[19:54] <!DM-sama> What do?
[19:55] <!DM-sama> Sazir Belor Lash Vripe
[19:55]  * Sazir walks over to the dead bodies and looks them over. "Oh this'll do very nicely. Awaken my lovelies, awaken and fill this town with your explosions!" He says as he casts [Create Undead] and aims to make the acid/poison kind
[19:55] <Belor_> How close is the nearest patrol?
[19:56] <!DM-sama> The corpses nearby animate and spring to life boiling with green fluids from all of their wounds.
[19:56] <!DM-sama> A ways away, those bird things are fast.
[19:57] <Sazir> "Go on then my lovelies! Go on and make more of your brothers and sisters!"
[19:58] <!DM-sama> The undead run screaming into the village as trails of smoke pour from their eye sockets.
[19:58] <!DM-sama> "GHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" They shriek as they run mindlessly towards the nearest living thing before exploding.
[19:58] <@Malakai> (is it wrong that I can only hear them screaming like the kamikazies from Serious Sam?)
[19:59] <!DM-sama> As each corpse is showered in thick green fluid is springs to life and does a death charge of it's own.
[19:59]  * Sazir looks to Belor, Vripe and Lash. "Lets go shall we? Knowing him, the friendly heretic might have gotten himself in trouble somehow."
[19:59] <!DM-sama> The acid burns the flesh of the trolls..... but that's all.
[19:59] <!DM-sama> They seem totally unaffected by the disease itself.
[20:00] <!DM-sama> Sazir gets a boner as he remembers something about a shadow priestess.
[20:00] <Belor_> "Well we have our vanguard so we might as well move fast and forward just in case"
[20:00] <!DM-sama> She's already armed them against disease and poison most likely.
[20:00] <!DM-sama> That's okay though, her resistance only makes your penis harder.
[20:00] <Vripe> ba dum TISH
[20:01]  * DM-sama bows.
[20:01]  * Sazir walks behind his suicidal zombies while humming to himself. "Hm, oh my my, it seems one of their leader has warded them against some of my new experiments. No matter though, I'm sure they'll all be screaming to be set free one way or another."
[20:02] <!DM-sama> You all move towards the village.
[20:02] <!DM-sama> Your zombie sappers keep them at bay allowing you to make it to the center with ease.
[20:02] <Belor_> "At the very least they will be screaming no matter what happens"
[20:03] <!DM-sama> You arrive to see Malakai's legs poking out of a pile of ash where there used to be a building.
[20:03] <!DM-sama> The chief stands in the middle next to a tall human man with red hair.
[20:03] <!DM-sama> No, you've seen enough dragons in human form to know already.
[20:04] <!DM-sama> No human has that kind of presence.
[20:05] <!DM-sama> As explosions and burning buildings crackling fills the night air the man turns to you, his long red hair blowing in the night breeze as the troll woman reaches for her axe.
[20:05] <Sazir> "So, I take it your the dragon we're going to kill?"
[20:05] <!DM-sama> He holds out his hand to stop her, and she takes her hand from the haft.
[20:06] <!DM-sama> "Shhh." He says as he places a finger over his lips.
[20:06] <!DM-sama> Make a will save.
[20:06] <Sazir> roll 1d20+11
[20:06] <!DM-sama> Sazir rolled : 1d20+11 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{22}
[20:06] <Belor_> Roll 1d20+16
[20:06] <!DM-sama> Belor_ rolled : 1d20+16 --> [ 1d20=11 ]{27}
[20:06] <Vripe> roll 1d20+13
[20:06] <!DM-sama> Vripe rolled : 1d20+13 --> [ 1d20=19 ]{32}
[20:06] <!DM-sama> Lash
[20:07] <Lash> roll 1d20+14
[20:07] <!DM-sama> Lash rolled : 1d20+14 --> [ 1d20=18 ]{32}
[20:07] <!DM-sama> Sazir is shaken, the rest of you are unaffected.
[20:07] <Sazir> AH WAIT
[20:07] <Sazir> Ah no
[20:07] <Sazir> 23 wouldn't have made a different
[20:07] <Sazir> Never mind
[20:08] <!DM-sama> "First a cloak of black dragonhide.... now a robe of green dragonhide."
[20:09] <!DM-sama> "Could you be the group responsible for killing dragons in the surrounding area?"
[20:09]  * Sazir puts a hand around himself to try to stop the shaking. "P-perhaps..."
[20:09]  * Belor_ looks among the building on fire as they blaze through the night "A wonderful sight is it not dragon and that would indeed be us"
[20:09] <Vripe> "No, no, we just stole these from the guys who did, and killed them, too.  You should be thanking us."
[20:09]  * Vripe glares at the mages
[20:10] <!DM-sama> "I see, and such entertaining personalities too."
[20:10] <!DM-sama> "Well, I'll tell you this adventurers, I have no personal strife with you, as long as you don't turn your blades on me I'll consider your actions an asset."
[20:11] <!DM-sama> "And certainly not the only asset in your group..." He says as he glaces over at Lash before turning and walking towards Malakai.
[20:11] <Sazir> "M-my....what a wonderful personality you have."
[20:11] <!DM-sama> With a single hand he pulls him free of the ash pile and throws him in your general direction.
[20:12] <!DM-sama> "Oh no, I assure you you couldn't be more wrong.... I just don't believe in letting good resources go to waste."
[20:12]  * Sazir tries to dodge the flying Barbarian.
[20:12] <Sazir> "W-what a c-coincidence...Neither do I."
[20:12] <!DM-sama> The dragons grin is somewhere between charming and coniving, and you're not sure which end of the spectrum it's closer to.
[20:13] <!DM-sama> "Common ground then."
[20:13] <!DM-sama> The dragon looks around at the trolls who have now finally cleared out all the undead and surrouned you.
[20:13] <!DM-sama> "Kill yourselves." He says with a grin.
[20:14] <!DM-sama> "You've all been infected, you'll spread the disease to the rest of the clan if you return home."
[20:14] <!DM-sama> The warriors wordlessly thrust their spears into their chests one by one.
[20:15] <Vripe> yay
[20:15] <!DM-sama> Only the chief, who has remain untouched thanks to the efforts of her men stands next to the dragon.
[20:15]  * Belor_ he smiles to himself "My my my.....what blind loyalty they have"
[20:15] <Sazir> (They don't raise do they?)
[20:15] <Belor_> "Very useful tools no doubt"
[20:16] <Sazir> "T-too bad they didn't become into lovelies though..."
[20:16] <!DM-sama> "There are still 300 warriors, and 200 women among the clan. You're welcome to pursue us if you like, but as soon as I return home I'll place countermeasures to your undead."
[20:17] <Sazir> "T-then I'll suppose I'll have to try something else doesn't it?"
[20:17] <!DM-sama> "You're welcome to come peacefully though, I don't find many mortals entertaining enough to be my guests."
[20:17] <!DM-sama> "If you insist on being my enemies it won't end well for you."
[20:17] <!DM-sama> "Well.... it won't end well for most of you." he says glancing at Lash again.
[20:18] <!DM-sama> The troll chief puffs her cheeks in annoyance.
[20:18]  * Sazir attempts to shrug, though clearly shaken. "And I'm not stupid enough to attack an enemy I can't yet beat. Perhaps we will come to your place..peacefully."
[20:18] <!DM-sama> The dragon turns with a laugh and walks into the night around the village.
[20:19]  * Lash stares idly at the dragon as the joint in her mouth spontaneously ignites. "I hate people who stare..."
[20:19] <!DM-sama> Unseen he transforms, and you hear his massive wingbeats as he takes lfight with the troll chieftess on his back
[20:19] <Vripe> me jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis
[20:20] <Belor_> "I have to say I like this dragon, and it is a shame he must die"
[20:20] <!DM-sama> You can search the runes but there's nothing of value left.
[20:20] <Belor_> Anything still alive?
[20:20] <!DM-sama> On the bright side you got 50 troll corpses.
[20:20] <!DM-sama> Actually yes.
[20:20] <!DM-sama> A single girl.
[20:21] <!DM-sama> She as hiding in a large dresser.
[20:21] <!DM-sama> was*
[20:21]  * Sazir looks over at Belor. "So what say you old friend, kill her?"
[20:22] <!DM-sama> The dragon chose not to kill her because she chose to hide herself and not die with her family.
[20:22] <!DM-sama> Selfishness like that is rare from humans, especially teenagers.
[20:22] <!DM-sama> That's what he told her.
[20:22] <!DM-sama> She wants to kill ehrself now.
[20:22] <Vripe> duh you can't kill her
[20:22] <Vripe> are you guys even trying to be evil or what
[20:23]  * Belor_ smiles to himself and shakes his head as he walks over to her crouching so he is at eye level with her "Tell me little one.....what is your desire?"
[20:25] <!DM-sama> The girl cries into her hands.
[20:25] <!DM-sama> She doesn't have any family or any means of providing for herself.
[20:25] <!DM-sama> Not to mention the extreme self loathing she feels because of what the dragon said.
[20:26] <!DM-sama> She wants to die.
[20:26]  * Sazir comes behind the girl, his face next to her ear. "If you wish to be freed from the cage known as life, little one, then just simply do it. Take a knife and impale your heart upon it. And with it, you shall be free."
[20:27] <!DM-sama> roll a diplomacy check.
[20:27] <Sazir> roll 1d20+6
[20:27] <!DM-sama> Sazir rolled : 1d20+6 --> [ 1d20=14 ]{20}
[20:28] <Belor_> "No old friend, this one shall not be freed so easily. For she will server"
[20:28] <Belor_> serve*
[20:28] <!DM-sama> The girl picks up a nearby kitchen knife from amongst the rubble and looks at her reflection in the blade.
[20:28] <Sazir> "Shall she now my good friend, and how so?"
[20:28] <Sazir> "After all, what better way to serve than to die...and spread the word of the grandness of death?"
[20:29] <!DM-sama> She closes her eyes and points the blade at her chest as she shakes violently and tears stream down her cheeks.
[20:29] <!DM-sama> If you're going to stop her now is the time.
[20:30]  * Sazir simply stares with a happy grind across his face. (Brutus?)
[20:30]  * Belor places his hand on the blade "Her time is not yet....for she shall serve and will die when I tell her to"
[20:31]  * Belor glares at his friend as he says the last part.
[20:31] <!DM-sama> The girl trembles as you grab the blade.
[20:31] <!DM-sama> Her hands release it and she begins sobbing into them again.
[20:32] <!DM-sama> She can't stand at the moment, so you'll ahve to carry her to the cart if you plan on keeping her as a pet.
[20:32]  * Sazir looks visibly dissapointed. "Well, if that's your wish old friend. Do take care of her, otherwise she might join one of my lovelies."
[20:34]  * Belor_ grabs her hands and forces them away from her face "Look at me girl, for I am going to carve the heart out of a dragon and you....will help me" He says as he glares at her intently
[20:34] <!DM-sama> Okay.
[20:34] <Belor_> Okay.
[20:34] <!DM-sama> You guys can have 400 xp for that.
[20:34] <Vripe> yaay
[20:34] <Sazir> !
[20:34] <Lash> yay fuck it chuck it LEVELLLL
[20:34] <@Malakai> even me?
[20:34] <!DM-sama> You didn't really do anything but fail, but you failed in a way that made for good writing.
[20:35] <!DM-sama> So take your scrap xp.
[20:35]  * DM-sama dangles xp.
[20:35] <!DM-sama> SIT!
[20:35] <!DM-sama> Good dog.
[20:35]  * DM-sama pats.
[20:35]  * Malakai shoots you in the face and takes the xp
[20:35] <Vripe> I rolled once for 400 xp
[20:35] <Vripe> that's the hardest I've ever worked
[20:35] <@Malakai> lmao
[20:36] <Belor_> I really like this dragon.
[20:36] <Belor_> He has inspired me to make my own cult.
[20:37] <Sazir> As have I
[20:37] <Sazir> Bwhahaha
[20:39] <Sazir> So end of session or can we still continue?
[20:43] <Vripe> flames
[20:43] <Vripe> flames are truly
[20:43] <Vripe> truly
[20:43] <Vripe> truly
[20:43] <Vripe> outraageous
[20:44] <@Malakai> IDK, it's up to emmy
[20:44] <@Malakai> all I know is
[20:44] <@Malakai> >137 health
[20:44] <@Malakai> >3 attacks normally without being in rage
[20:44] <@Malakai> >+21/+16/+11
[20:44] <@Malakai> >When in rage
[20:44] <Sazir> 121 health yo!
[20:44] <Sazir> Also
[20:44] <Sazir> ACID FOG
[20:44] <@Malakai> >+24/+24/+19/+14
[20:44] <@Malakai> oh
[20:45] <@Malakai> and improved power attack
[20:45] <Sazir> FOR 11 ROUNDS CALI
[20:45] <@Malakai> jeebus
[20:45] <Sazir> A FOG THAT SPREADS 20 ft BOTH HIGH AND LONG
[20:45] <Sazir> OF PURE ACID
[20:45] <!DM-sama> HAven't decided.
[20:52] <Sazir> Alright, tell us if you do
[20:54] <!DM-sama> We're done for now.
[20:54] <!DM-sama> I'm tired.
[20:54] <!DM-sama> We'll probably play again tomorrow.