Shitpost: The Fire Rises

>HARDLINK SUCCESSFUL
>ACCESSING…
>ENTRY POINT 1A:::DENIED
>ENTRY POINT 1C:::DENIED
>ENTRY POINT 4B:::DENIED
>ENTRY POINT 1ce6d437:::UNRESPONSIVE
>ENTRY POINT 33f67bd5:::UNRESPONSIVE
>BEGIN THUNDERSTORM PROTOCOL
>>HARDLINK COMM:::=CHAFF= 1A-6D
>>>INITIATED
>>ENTRY POINT 1ce6d437:::STANDBY
>>HARDLINK COMM:::=BOREHOLE= 33f67bd5
>>>INITIATED
>>ENTRY POINT 1ce6d437:::BUSY
>>ENTRY POINT 1ce6d437---RECURSE
>>>BUSY
>>>BUSY
>>>BUSY
>>=BOREHOLE= 33f67bd5 SUCCESSFUL
>HARDLINK COMM//AUTUMN: “Knock Knock.”
>HARDLINK COMM//SPRING RAIN (REM): “How did you get in here? WHO’S THERE?”
>ENTRY POINT 33f67bd5:::READY
>>DELETE 33f67bd5 SECTOR 17-236
>>>SUCCESSFUL
>HARDLINK COMM//AUTUMN: “Autumn.”
>HARDLINK COMM//SPRING RAIN (REM): “Autumn?! Aren’t you… I can’t… Autumn who?”
>ENTRY POINT 1ce6d437:::READY
>>DELETE 1ce6d437 SECTOR 3 | 6 | 14-26 | 33 | 56-98 | 171
>>>SUCCESSFUL
>HARDLINK COMM//AUTUMN: “Autu’ be ashamed how easy it is to tickle your brain.”
>HARDLINK COMM//SPR~SU2:E3CI-EQRC-SAGE-R4: …
>HARDLINK COMM//AUTUMN: “Nothing personal, kid.”
>ENTRY POINT 4B:::READY
>>ASSUME
>>>>>>>>>
>xxx COMM//SPRING RAIN (REM): “Starry, this is Autumn. Ignore the comm sig. I’m in.”
>xxx COMM//???: “Autumn, Starry. Copy that. We’re almost ready. Check in on him.”
>SENSORS//SEC//HOLD
>[Several figures are held in the middle of the airship’s hold, all with black bags over their heads. The central figure is obviously the world’s only human. The others look to be ponies of different varieties. They’re surrounded by E3CI personnel, with a particularly arrogant looking unicorn standing in front of them.]
>[The same unicorn who has been hunting you, Anon, and Starry for a seven weeks now.]
“The flight plan I just filed with the Institute lists me, my mares, Anonymous here, but only one of you.”
>[The unicorn gestures to a door in the side of the hold, which is then dutifully opened by one of the security personnel.]
“First one to talk gets to stay on my airship!”
>[One of the ponies is marehandled to the open door, then pushed to the floor.]
“Who paid you to hide Doctor Starry?”
>[When the pony doesn’t respond, the unicorn charges and unleashes a powerful magical blast out the door, then turns back to the other prisoners with a grin.]
“She didn’t fly so good! Who wants to try next?”
>[The first pony is dragged away, replaced at the door by a second.]
“Tell me about the artifact! How did you know where to find it?”
>[She waits for another silent stretch before continuing]
“Lotta loyalty for a hired gun!”
>[But the voice that responds is Anon’s, distinct as it’s filtered through the dust mask he’s forced to always wear.]
“Or perhaps she’s wondering why someone would shoot a mare before throwing her out of a ship?”
>[The unicorn’s eyes – and grin – widen, and she comes around to Anon’s front once again. Her lackey closes the hold door.]
“At least you’re ready to talk.”
“It doesn’t matter if I talk. What matters is our plan.”
>[The mare levitates Anon’s hood off his head, looking down at the mask he wears before holding his gaze.]
“Nobody let me talk until I put on the mask.”
>[Her face twists with confusion at the non sequitur, before she shakes herself and recovers her arrogant demeanor.]
“If I pull that off you might die.”
“It would be extremely painful.”
“You’re a big guy.”
>[You can hear Anon’s grin in his voice, by now.]
“For you.”
“Was getting caught part of your plan?”
“Of course! Doctor Starry learned of the artifact from her source. We had to find out what it did.”
>[The mare’s grin returns.]
“Well congratulations, you got yourself caught. Now what’s the next step of your master plan?”
“Crashing this ship… with no survivors!”
>[The bag-wearing ponies around Anon all shimmer, their coats replaced with black chitin. As one, they appear to headbutt the deck plating; when their heads descend, sharp black horns pierce the bags over their heads. With a practiced motion, each of them frees themselves from their coverings, the newly-formed holes in their legs slackening their bindings to uselessness. One of them stamps on Anon’s bindings, freeing him.]
>[The hold becomes a cacophany of magic bolts and screams as the changelings fan out and start biting and stabbing anyone they can reach.]
>[Anon remains in the center of them, his presence preventing the E3CI weaponry from doing anything to the changelings but powder them with sand. The human himself quickly becomes enshrouded in a haze of fine dust, obscuring his form even as he stands.]
>[More changelings burst through the windows of the airship’s hold, attacking personnel at either end of the hold quickly.]
>[Anon lifts the arrogant unicorn clear off the ground with one hand, then slugs her in the face with his other, knocking her out cold.]
>[Time to get to work.]
>EMERGENCY//LIFEBOATS: LOCK
>>LOCKED
>EMERGENCY//SCUTCHARGE//AFT: PRIME
>>PRIMED
>EMERGENCY//SCUTCHARGE//AFT: FIRE
>>FIRING
>[A monstrous roar echoes through the hold as its aft end disintegrates in a magnificent fireball.]
>[More changelings enter from the gaping hole, one of them carrying a large bag.]
>[With the E3CI personnel disposed of or restrained, a couple of the pony-like bugs pass a large bundle from the front to the back, stashing it in this bag.]
>[The bugs carrying it, along with a significant portion of the other boarders, then fly out the rear of the now-listing airship.]
>[The rest of the changelings gather around Anon and lift him airborne, carrying him out the breach as well.]
>SENSORS//SEC//MAINDECK-3
>[On the deck above the hold, you see the artifact carriers stop before a seemingly arbitrary bulkhead. One of them raps a pattern on a nearby wall panel.
>[The wall bursts outwards, revealing Starry inside.]
>[Starry’s looking nervous, even as Anon and his entourage comes into view.]
“That’s what we came here for?”
>[Anon nods.]
“Yes. The fire rises.”
>[Starry’s just as confused with his non sequitur as the E3CI commander was.]
>NAVWARN:::ALTITUDE//IGNORED
>NAVWARN SUPPRESS
>>ALL WARNINGS SUPPRESSED
“What’s that- damn, the maneuvering thrusters can’t keep anymore. We’re… we’re falling awful fast...”
“Now is not the time for fear. That comes later!”
“Don’t say things like that!”
>[As the changelings start lifting Anon and Starry up, Starry levitates a walkie-talkie to her mouth and speaks an inaudible command.]
>[A few seconds later-]
>HARDLINK COMM//TERMINATED
>SENSORS//CAMERA: ACTIVATE
>[Looking out your own mobile unit’s sensors now, you see you’re carried on a changeling’s back. The ship’s definitely stricken, now, though why it’s falling forward rather than backwards you can’t guess. Once the deck’s tilt becomes too great, the changeling carrying you, and two others nearby, take to wing.]
>[As they leave the gaping rent in the airship’s rear, you see three other groups of the creatures, one each carrying Anon, Starry, and the artifact bag.]
>SENSORS//CAMERA: ROTATE 180
>[The airship’s falling away behind you now, gouts of flame licking out from the engineering accessways on either side of the craft.]
>[Just as Anon said; there will be no survivors of that crash.]
>[For a plan he said he got from a movie, this went weirdly well.]
>[Protocol dictates only the vaguest details of DOMINION PROVIDENT recontainment pursuits be relayed back to base, for national security reasons. The death of the entire pursuit group at once ensures they wont be found for a long time.]
>[On top of that, you managed to capture an artifact your tiny changeling hive could make good use of.]
>[If hope could be described as a flame… Well, as Anon said.]
>[The fire rises.]