[FR] Fracture: A Long Time Coming

>Day...Hell, you've honestly lost count
>You are Anonymous, sole human in Equestria
>It has been one year to the day since the magical cast and sutures on your dong disappeared
>It's a bit of a long story
>Totally wasn't embarassing at all walking around with a big cast on your junk for 2 months
>It felt like years while it was on though
>So many loads you could have blown...
>"Anonymous? You've stopped walking. Are you alright?"
Hmm? Oh, sorry. Just lost in thought. You go on ahead.
>You are currently taking Fluttershy, or her clone rather, to Twilight's for a checkup
>Another long story, lots of blood that needed to be cleaned up that day
>Fluttershy continues walking ahead towards Twilight's Castle at your affirmation, and you went slowly after her
>You never could get used to that crystal monstrosity, nor Twilight's coronation as the Princess of Friendship.
>Granted, she really was an excellent friend outside of her morally dubious experiments, but she could never get o-
>"ANONYMOUS WOULD YOU GET INSIDE ALREADY?!", a purple princess hush-screamed at you. "SHE COULD BE WATCHING!"
1/

Twilight, I've told you time and again that Celestia doesn't care about your "projects."
>"But she DOES, Anon, I know it! Why else would she make me a Princess?"
To reward you for finally coming out of your NEET-o-sphere and saving the world a few times?
>"Or maybe it's because she wants the stress of my higher position to make me crack and confess, but that ain't happening!" Twilight beams, confidently
>This confidence is quickly replaced by a nervous glance at a somewhat conspicuous flowerpot in the corner of the room
"N-not that I have anything to confess, no ma'am!"
>She casually turns the plant around as she serves up tea and cookies for the three of you
>It's a nice and fragrant black tea, and the cookies are ginger snaps
>"So, Anon, how has she been doing?"
Mphhmohmma, you mumble through a mouthful of cookies
>If ever you had a weakness, it was ginger snaps
>Twilight smiles and shakes her head
>"Glad to see those baking lessons are paying off. So, Fluttershy, how would you say you are doing?"
2/

>"Mphmpmah."
>Shy's mouth is stuffed to bursting with cookies as well
>You choke a bit as you laugh a crumb into your windpipe
>Twilight just shakes her head
>A purple aura surrounds the tray of cookies and lifts them towards the cieling
>"I'm sorry, Shy, I didn't quite catch that."
>Twilight hands Fluttershy one of the cups of tea, pulling out a small journal as she does so
>Fluttershy takes a sip of tea to soften up the cookies, and swallows
>"Things are going well, Twilight. Anon has been a very gracious houseguest, and the animals have really taken to his being around."
Oh stop, you flatter me.
>It really wasn't too hard
>As long as you took the carnivores fishing every now and then, you avoided most of the major problems
>Everything else was handled by your admittedly shoddy impersonation of their original master
>"I'm serious! For some reason the animals just seem to ignore me lately."
>"Interesting...", Twilight scribbles furiously in her notebook
>Her horn lights up again, and a small necklace appears in Twilight's hooves
>It's the Element of Kindness, its gem dull and washed out
>"Let's see if you're able to synchronize, Fluttershy."
3/

>Twilight lowers the Element, moving Fluttershy's mane out of the way so it can rest on her neck
>Twilight releases her aura, and the Element glows a bright teal
>Fluttershy's eyes go white as she floats into the air
>A magic wind begins swirling around the sitting room as the power of the-
>PBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBT
>The Element loses its glow, and Fluttershy's return to their mint green as she falls back onto the couch.
>"Ow."
Heh.
>"Anon! This is not funny!", Twilight glares at you
I think it's very funny, Twi. I mean, it's a powerful magical artifact and it farts.
>Twilight scribbles into her journal again, still glaring at you
>Fluttershy quietly hands the Element back to Twilight
>"I thought it was pretty funny" another voice chimes in
>It's coming from a little dragon holding a big scroll of paper
Thank you, Spike!
>Twilight rolls her eyes
>"Anon, please, I've seen Spike laugh because his Alpha-Bits spelled 'Boty'."
>"No, I was laughing because they almost spelled 'Booty'."
4/

Point is, his opinion has more weight than yours here.
>"I....I guess you're right."
>Twilight stops writing for a moment
>The castle goes deathly silent
>Fluttershy quietly takes a sip of tea
>Your breathing feels like the loudest thing in existence
>"HMH", Spike clears his throat, breaching the forced calm
>"Well...I better go give this scroll to Trixie. She said something about Starlight's birthday coming up soon and...yeah..."
>With that, he heads to some other room in the castle
>"Y-yes. Anyway Anon, as I was saying," Twilight continued "I don't think this very funny."
>She flips through her the pages in her journal
>"The Elements of Harmony are very...'finicky', to put it plainly. It probably thinks something is missing from Fluttershy, but I'm not sure what..."
>You look over at Fluttershy
>She seems to have gone pale
>"M-missing something?"
>Her teacup starts to shake a bit in her hooves
>Twilight sees this as well and changes tone
>"Don't worry Shy, it's probably just some magic dissonance from your progenitor. I'm sure that you'll be using your Element in no time!"
>She smiles, probably a bit more than she needs to
>But it takes the edge off Fluttershy, and she gives a small smile in return
5/

So, what are you making there?
>Twilight began the second phase of testing some time ago
>Something about "Shallow Memory Reading" and "MagiMuscle Coordination", and a whole slew of other 20 dollar words
>She was one damned thorough mare when it came to tests
>You thought it was boring as hell, so you wandered off to see what Spike and Trixie were up to
>"Why, it is a drawing of the 'iced cream' Starlight told Trixie so much about!"
>Trixie beams with pride as she passes you the scroll
>"Trixie made it 'swirled' flavor.
>Taking a look, it's a double-scoop of swirled ice cream on some kind of fancy cup
>Literally, the two scoops were resting on top of the glass
>Wasn't even drawn that well
>They kinda looked more like wrinkly peaches than ice cream, really
Hmmm...
>You grab a pencil as inspiration strikes
It's almost perfect Trix, you just need a few condensation lines here and OH! A streak of ice cream coming off the bottom of the glass like this...
>Trixie watches with awe as you make her drawing into the best birthday card it can be
>Spike is holding back giggles as you turn her ice cream into a veiny wang
And a few sprinkles for good measure~!
6/

>Trixie looks stunned by your handiwork
>"Th-thank you, Anonymous! Starlight is sure to love this!"
>Spike composes himself for a moment
>"You sure, Trixie? I thought Starlight was more of a mare's mare-PFFTThehehe", he says, relapsing into giggles
>"Mare's mare?' Trixie ponders the question over her birthday card
>"Heheheh"
Yeah, I don't think she'd be able to handle such a thick and meaty birthday card
>The tips of her ears turn bright red, and soon the rest of her face follows suit
>"T-T-TTRIXIE NEEDS A GREAT AND POWERFUL ERASER!" She screams as she flails around in her art supplies
>You and Spike fall to the floor, rolling as Trixie alternates between erasing your drawing and batting at the two of you
>She hits pretty hard despite her slight frame
ow-OWOW!Shit! I was just kidding, calm down!
>"Trixie, what are you doing?" A voice calls into the room
>Looking over, it's Fluttershy, who looks a little upset
>"ANONYMOUS TURNED TRIXIE'S BIRTHDAY GIFT INTO A VULGAR SIDESHOW PIECE!"
I used pencil, didn't I? It'll get covered up easy with some paint.
>You hoist yourself onto your feet
7/

So all your tests done, then?
>Fluttershy nods, "Yes, Twilight says everything is okay, barring my inability to use the Element of Kindness. She's still unable to find the cause though."
>Ooph, that's got to be a bit of a bummer
Don't worry about it Shy, I'm sure it'll come back to you soon enough.
>You head around the room, saying your goodbyes
>Trixie gives you a small huff
Oh come on, I'm sure Shimmer will enjoy whatever you give her.
>This softens her up a bit, just enough to give you a weak hoofshake
>Spike asks "Are we still on for this Wednesday?"
Sure, I even figured out a way to get AJ involved too, so don't worry.
>He hugs your leg
>He hugs it a bit longer than he should, probably
>You kinda smear him onto Trixie as you leave
Night guys! Night, Twilight!
>You open the door, seeing the sky for the first time in hours
>The sunset gets you right in the eyes, and it hurts like hell
>But with Fluttershy in tow, you head back to her cottage
>Twilight, however, is spazzing out behind you and calling for Spike to bring the notebooks
8/

>The air is refreshing and cool as you make your way back to Fluttershy's cottage
>You pass by your house along the way, tarps on its windows
>Only you knew the tarps were just for show
>"So, your house is still being painted?", Fluttershy pipes up
Oh, uh yeah. Apparently they can't get the right type of primer that covers the woodscrews.
>"O-oh. Okay then."
>Wew, thank god she knows nothing about construction
>The rest of your walk is fairly quiet
>The crickets and cicadas make a chirpy soundtrack to your walk
>Eventually, you reach the cottage
>A comfy little shack that Fluttershy shares with you, Angel, and Discord
>When you enter, it's still and dark
Hey Shy, what day is it today?
>"Monday, Anon. Why?"< Fluttershy responds as she heads upstairs
No reason, just wondering where everyone is.
>You take off your shoes, and set your jacket on the coatrack
>Being Monday night, Angel was probably out in the Red Light district overseeing his business ventures
>Which would mean Discord is...
>"Discord is...what?"
HOJEEZE
9/

>The coatrack, it turns out, was a very big antler
>Connected to a very tiny Discord resting on top
>"Oh my, Anonymous, were you hoping I wasn't here? Expecting a romantic evening alone with Miss Shy?"
>His eyes grow large and flutter-flitter at you
No, you perv. Just making sure my roommates aren't off in a ditch somewhere.
>He snaps off his antler, making you wince a bit
>He then pops back to full size, and inflates a new antler from his head
>"Yeah yeah, I like you too and all. Now, what show are we going to marathon tonight?"
>The couch you two used as a bed is transformed into a row of theater seats and a small t.v.
>It wasn't shared for sex reasons, you just like having someone to cuddle, and Discord is just so plush and curvace-
Hey! Quit changing my internal monologue!
>"Alright fine, buzzkill."
>Discord lounges across most of the seats, and pulls out a remote
>"I hear CSI: Apploosa is good for some laughs."
Perfect. I'll get the popcorn ready.
>As you make the popcorn, you think you hear a faint retching noise
>Fluttershy usually feels sick after her sessions
>You would too, being poked and prodded by that weird purple monstrosity
>I mean, whose bright idea was it to live and work from a big crystal abomina-
Discord!
>"I'm not doing it! Hoonest~!"
>You let out a chuckle as you head back to the living room with popcorn
>This week, you thought, is going to be great
10/

>RING RING
>"I'll get it!"
>Discord lazily strecthed his arm out to the phone, followed by his mouth and left ear
Gross, dude.
>He responds with a wink
>"Why hello, Princess Twilight! Why so la-oh yes, he's right here"
>Witin an instant of an instant, you were plopped onto the floor of the kitchen.
Ow.
>You take the phone from Discord's talon
Hey Twi, what's up?
>"Anonymous, I need to talk to you. Are you free now? Is anyone bugging the call?"
>Oh great, more paranoia
One sec. DISCORD I SWEAR IF YOU ARE LISTENING IN THAT I WILL DRAG YOU TO TARTURUS MYSELF!, you yell to the draconequus on the couch
>You can see him jam his hands into his ears
>A thumbs-up, covered in earwax, is shot to you in reassurance
Sorry Twi, I'm kinda busy till Fri-
>"Friday? Awesome, come in on Thursday, first thing in the morning. Alone. This is a royal decree."
>Click
>BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>You hang up the phone
Great, you huff as you head back to the couch
>Guess this week won't be so great after all
11