DAiE Ch. 2 Interlude - The Afterparty

>You are Doctor Anonymous. You have returned the dead to life and found a way to improve duct tape.
>And right now, you're feeling pretty damn good.
>At least, you would be if your head didn't feel like a diesel engine had been working on it.
>What the hell happened last night?
>As you try to remember the blurry haze, you stir slightly.
"Ughhh..."
>That's all you can manage, your body promptly replies with a "Fuck you." and your muscles give way.
>That's fine. Laying here is just fine.
>What DID happen last night though?
>Bits and pieces of party Pinkamina threw for you drift through your consciousness.
>You see images of dancing... dinosaurs?
>Oh, right, the dancing!
>And then chatting it up. You were feeling loose and relaxed for the first time in... ages.
>And it only got better (or worse?) when Rainbow brought out the cider.
>Oh, dear science, the cider.

>Twilight went home soon after. Apparently, drinking wasn't her favorite thing, but it seemed like she had enjoyed herself.
>Drinking typically wasn't your favorite thing either, but adrenaline had carried you into it.
>Albert had tried to stop you, of course. He remembers the last time you drank.
>What a worrywart. You DID manage to destroy the super-AIDS you created, right?
>At least, you think it's destroyed.
>What were you thinking about?
>Oh! The party.
>The rest of it is mostly a haze. Only flashes of it are available to you.
>The grey pony (who you learned was named Derpy) singing.
>Rarity getting utterly smashed and yelling about dresses.
>Rainbow and Applejack... kissing? No. You think you imagined that.
>And Pinkamina.
>She was there for you the whole night, always making sure you had a good time.
>You really owe her one. You haven't had that much fun, or felt so good about yourself in ages.
>Finally, you push yourself off the floor and look around. Most everyone had crashed wherever they pleased, as you apparently did.
>It's only right before you look in front of you that you finally notice that odd weight in your lap.
>oh god what
>Pinkamina apparently decided to pass out with her head in your lap, her face dangerously near your crotch.
>Danger alert. DANGER ALERT.

>You feel the spaghetti in your slack's pockets start to brew up, the danger alert klaxon still ringing in your head.
>You gently shake Pinkamina, trying to urge her away from you.
"Pinkamina... Pinkamina, wake up."
>You are basically pleading.
>She stirs, her bright, blue eyes fluttering open.
>"Oh... hi Anon."
>She yawns and closes her eyes again.
"Pinkamina!"
>One eye opens, and she looks up at you, then down at where she's resting.
>Instantly, she's on her hooves, her face painted a bright, crimson shade.
>"O-oh! Sorry about that! Guess I just sort of fell over. We partied too hard!"
>She giggles, trying to salvage the situation.
>You hear Rarity's angry, hoarse from somewhere behind the counter, telling her to keep it down.
"Ha! Ha! I-I suppose we did."
>You are certain your laughter is convincing.
>Pinkamina seems happy to buy it, whether or not she believes.
"Hey, listen, Pinkamina."
>One hoof rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, she cocks her head at you inquisitively.
>"Yes Anon?"
>She is not at all expecting the ridiculous hugging you give her.

>Neither are you, really. This sort of contact is not really your forte!
>And you mean, why should it be? Touching other people - or ponies, is really sort of disgusting.
>There are just all sorts of bacterium and diseases and dirtandsmellsand-
>No! She really deserves you NOT freaking out on her for this.
>Actually, this is kind of nice. It's the first time you've hugged, well, ANYTHING for... years.
>Maybe decades.
>She's warm, and soft. And... stiff?
>Every muscle in her body seems incredibly tense.
>Maybe this is a normal reaction to being hugged. You wouldn't goddamn know.
>You let her go, and smile down at her. Her face is even brighter red as she looks back up.
"Thanks, is what I meant to say. I didn't want this party at first, but... I really did enjoy it."
>She beams up at you, and is about to say something before you hear a voice.
>"PINKIE PIE!"
>Oh shit it's Mrs. Cake.

>You had met Pinkamina's boss/landlord last night. And she looks furious.
>Pinkamina's pupils shrink to pinpoints.
>"Oh! Are we opening soon?" She asks with a nervous smile, knowing full well the answer as Mrs. Cake glares sternly at her.
>In a pink blur, Pinkamina rushes around the store, waking everyone up (or at least getting them on their hooves), and gathering them into the center of the room.
>Her arms stretch around the entire group somehow, and before you know it, you and the rest of the ponies are being pushed out of Sugarcube Corner.
>"ThanksforcomingeveryoneI'dlovetohaveyoustaybutwe'reopeningsoonandIneedtogetthestorecleanso
buhbyenow!"
>Okay.
>You stumble outside, the rest of the ponies trying to get their bearings.
>"Mah head.. wut happened last night?" Applejack asks, one hoof shielding her eyes from the sun.
>"Oh... nothing interesting." Replies Dash, looking towards the ground with a slight blush on her face.
"What? Didn't you-"
>Rainbow looks ready to kill you, but your conversation is interrupted as Twilight walks up to the recovering crowd with Albert in tow, looking significantly more refreshed than you feel anyone has the right to be right now.
>"Good morning everyp0ny! Hello, Anonymous, I have some great news!"
"Oh, do you?"
>She nods, opening a small bag hanging off her side and telekinetically levitating a rolled-up paper out of it. You are still not used to this casual defiance of physics.
>The note floats over to you with its purple aura, and it unfurls on its own.
>"My mentor, Princess Celestia, wants to meet you!"

>You are Doctor Anonymous. And you rescind completely the part about feeling good.
>Because right now, you are scared out of your mind.
"princess celestia"
>Twilight doesn't seem to pick up on your fear.
>"Yeah! She's never heard of a human before, so as a visitor to Equestira, she's very eager to meet you!"
>ohgodohmanohgodohman
"oh thats good when"
>Now she seems to be picking up that something is wrong.
>"Uhm... today? You're not doing anything, right? I mean, you just arrived in our universe yesterday!"
"well id love to but actually i am doing something! I-I.. I need to help.. uh... Applejack!"
>Twilight looks at Applejack, who gives her a confused shrug. "Help her with what?"
"With... apples!"
>"Uhh.. thanks for the offer, sugarcube, but we don't need much help around the farm."
"silly me did i say applejack i meant uh... twilight! I need to help Twilight reorganize her books!"
>Twilight shakes her head. "Okay, Anon, first of all I -am- Twilight. Second, re-shelving day isn't for a week and a half."
"oh how silly of me"

>Albert finally chimes in.
>"Come on, Doctor. This is a great opportunity!"
"Oh, no, Albert. Do you not remember the last time I visited royalty?"
>He shakes his head. "Look, the Queen -survived- being savaged by those flying monkeys, didn't she?"
>The other ponies give both of you weird looks. It's probably best they don't know.
>"Look, Doctor, if we're going to get situated in Equestria, this is the perfect chance!"
>Goddamnit Albert.
"Shut up, Albert! I didn't program you to use logic to get me to do things that are good ideas!"
>"Yes you did, Sir."
"I said shut up."
>Twilight smiles widely at you. "So you'll do it then?"
>You sigh. You are not prepared for this shit.
"Yes, fine."
>Suddenly, you hear a tiny squee. You look behind you and see Rarity, barely containing a massive smile.
>"Darling, if you're going to see the Princess, you certainly can't go like this."
>"I agree."
>GODDAMNIT ALBERT.
"What.. what do you mean?"
>Rarity finally gives in to smiling.
>"I mean, darling, you need a makeover."
>"...and a bath." She seems less excited about that part.