Helping Queeny

Alexithymiaa: (Oh my god I love those slippers)
Tsaaq: ((Fuzzies.))
Alexithymiaa: -After a VERY long shift at the hospital because New Years day was an incredibly busy day in the ER, Quinn had finally made her way home, exhausted and frankly traumatized. The front of her scrubs were covered in dried blood, her braid was messy, and her make up was visibly smeared down her face. Staggering into the house in a daze, she kicked the front door shut behind her, walking like a zombie into the kitchen to drop her keys down onto the counter before walking over to the fridge to pull it open, just staring into it in her transe.-
Tsaaq: Penelope came down the stairs once she heard the door opened and smiled, knowing it had been Quinn. She swayed her hips as she went into the kitchen and she tilted her head. Pouting at the sight of Zombie Quinn. "Q-t?" She called out before leaning her elbows on the kitchen island. "Long shift?"
Alexithymiaa: -Hearing Penelope faintly, she turned from the inside of the fridge to face her, her eyes dropping over Penelope's cute outfit and just generally looking flawless before her eyes swelled with tears. She sucked in a deep breath before silently nodding her head, trying to do everything in her power not to just break down because today sucked.-
Tsaaq: She gasped softly and stood up, going around the kitchen island straight to Quinn. She wrapped her arms around her and pulled her in as she began to pat her back with comfort. "Well you're home now. And everything's okay." She said firmly before kissing her blonde head.
Alexithymiaa: -She wrapped her arms around Penelope's back and squeezed her, dropping her forehead down onto her shoulder and closing her eyes. "I've never lost a patient before..." She mumbled into her shoulder, clinging onto her.-
Tsaaq: "Oh dear..." She whispered before putting her hand up Quinn's chin to lift her head so she'd look at her. "These things happen. And death is a natural part of life and your job. And one must remember you can't save everyone. But as long as your did your best it still matters." She spoke softly to her. "Please don't beat yourself up about it."
Alexithymiaa: -She looked into Penelope's eyes and started to nod despite the fact that her words were contradictory. "But... what if I made a mistake? What if I did something incorrectly and that was a matter of life or death? What if the doctor instructed me to do something and trusted I did it correctly and didn't look over what I'd done?"-
Tsaaq: Penelope shrugged her shoulders. "We can't really mull over what we should've and could've done in that vein. You should only worry about that so you can learn from whatever mistakes you might've made. But I'm pretty sure that you did your best. I know you work hard."
Alexithymiaa: "But that's not good enough. People's lives are in our hands and they trust us to take care of them. If we make frivolous mistakes, people die." She pouted, easing back away from Penelope so she could fully look into her face. "I dont know if I could live with that guilt on my shoulders. I want to help people, not let them die."-
Tsaaq: "Well you're not always going to work in ER, aren't you just starting out with that stuff. You could always go somewhere else where you have a level of expertise and you won't lose any of your patients?" Penelope asked with a frown as she stroked the other females hair.
Alexithymiaa: "My interests lie in cardiology and oncology, both of which rely heavily on making the right decisions. They might not be emergency medicine, but a mistake can easily be fatal in both areas." She shifted to lean back against the counter, her eyes dropping down to the blood on her scrubs. "Maybe I'm just not cut out to be a doctor. Not everyone is."-
Tsaaq: Penelope shrugged her shoulders then sighed. "Maybe you are, maybe you aren't?" She asked. "Is this something that you really want to do?" She asked her with a gentle look.
Alexithymiaa: "I thought it was, but I don't want to be responsible for someone's death. Up until this point everything I've done has been menial and mostly fluff. I've never literally had someone's life in my hands, and the first opportunity I really had to save someone, I didn't." She pouted, the visual of her scrubs growing blurry as her eyes filled with tears again.-
Tsaaq: Penelope went to pull her in for another hug. "Perhaps I'm the wrong person to talk to about this... But I think if you don't want that kind of pressure on you? You shouldn't do it. But maybe you should talk to Thorny too? He'd understand better. I just don't want you to be sad."
Alexithymiaa: -She stepped into Penelope's hug and wrapped her arms around the female, holding onto her tightly. "Maybe I should. Though I don't know what he could possibly say. He's very good at what he does..."-
Tsaaq: She went to kiss the top of her head. "You definitely should. He'd have better advice for you." Penelope said. "I just want you to be happy and confident in whatever it is you want to do."
Alexithymiaa: "Thank you." She forced a smile onto her face and looked into Penelope's eyes. "Maybe I'll text him and see if he can come over tomorrow so we can talk. But maybe tonight I'll go shower and then we can cuddle?"-
Tsaaq: Penelope smiled and nodded her head quickly. "I would love that." She said. "I'll make you some sleepy time tea and bring it up to you. Maybe some cookies as well."
Alexithymiaa: "You're the best." She said with a watery smile, leaning in to kiss Penelope's cheek. She ran her hand over Penelope's arm before stepping around her, making her way toward the stairs so she could go up to her room and strip out of her clothes to shower.-