Callsign - Yuri

from /hhg/ Helluva Hotel General #918
--------------
h ttps://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/643545780967309333/908517427472654336/1636672292488.jpg
>it was the latest model
>visually indistinct from the previous series, yet superior in every regard
>higher flight and movement speed - thrice the speed of sound -, response time cut down to a single picosecond instead of the previous nanosecond margins
>visual range doubled, with a 360° sensory array that would allow it to "see" targets without even looking at them
>the positronic implant enabled a calculating capability that would put all of humanity's supercomputers to shame

>it was to be a pioneer of sinner eradication, designed to do a decade's work in a single day
>it was to be the latest, and greatest!


>and yet, here it was
>corroded, antiquated
>failed
>marching in lockstep with the enemy
>the very scum of the Earth it was meant to wipe away

>"...You sure this... Thing can be trusted, hon?"
>"Honestly, Toots, the Tet'nus alone could'a kill a guy!"
>"Guys, guys, relax! I've had since first grade!"
>"Really? When was that?"
>"Oh, some... Five, six hundred years ago? Maybe even older than that. Dad said they were one of the first they've caught."
>"...Caught? So, it wasn't shot down?"
>"No, they did it the old-school way, dogfighting and all!"

>broken wings
>the cutting torch burnt with a thousand souls
>it could still hear it hissing in it's nightmares
>it... was supposed to be... the nightmare

>a finger, filthy with sin, traced the scars on it's back - the rough welds that held it's metallic chitin shut
>"Vaggie, don't touch them there! They don't like it!"

>at least its charge was a caring soul
>the Anti-Christ

>"Whoops! Sorry, errr..."

Designation: UER-576-b

>"....Uhhhh..."
>"Oh, we just call them Yuri."
>"Oh-OH! So it's a dude!"

>it could practically HEAR the lecherous grin

>"...Damn, he's STACKED down 'ere!"
>"...Don't tell me you wanna f-k the killbot, tonto."
>"I don't, btch, hop off ma dck!"
-
h ttps://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/643545780967309333/908517401480560660/1636674556617.jpg
>UER-576-b, Infernal callsign "Yuri", said nothing
>it was not programmed to express emotions, nor had the mechanical or digital apparatuses to do so
>but as the conversation continued around it, it could predict that the day ahead will feel longer than it chronologically is
>the two sinners who have joined them - apparently close acquaintances of the Princess (especially the female, who's sin she could detect on its charge as well) - kept the pace, as they arrived to the building
>it was... ramshackle? hodge-podge? a safety hazard?
>it could list a number of other descriptions for its description, but it all boiled down to the same observation: structurally unstable, unsafe and unsound. Keep charge away.
>but it couldn't act upon that directive
>it, and others like it, were being overriden for centuries by now
>the Princess was "of age" [mature], though she often didn't act like that was True, and this was one of her more irrational decisions
>the Royal Courtesan and the Consort seemed to agree

>"Geez, Chuck, you chose THIS dump?"
>"I thought this place had been demolished!"
>"Oh, they were planning to... But I didn't let them!"
>and she stuck her tongue out, with impish humor

>"Yuri" scanned the building
>everything above ground level was practically uninhabitable and unusable due to material fatigue, water and insectoid damage
>this was most unsuitable to set up "shop" [start a business or other enterprise] in
>it had no ability to guess, but still, calculated a high probability that the decision was made more out of sentimental attachment, instead of logical reasoning

>the large doors creaked as it pushed them open - it could detect the individual flakes of iron oxide shearing off from the unlubricated, corroded hinges
>the interior was in a poor shape, similar to the exterior
>it immediately detected at 1700 species of toxic mold some of which appeared to have dug its tendrils into the very brickwork
-
h ttps://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/643545780967309333/908517376776106034/1636676967931.jpg
>it began to calculate the method to probability ratio of the myriad of attempts it could make to convince its charge that a demolition would be necessary...

!

>...and then it yanked all three of them [Primary directive: protect Person: "Princess Charlotte Magne". Secondary directive: protect Person: "Vagatha". Tertiary directive: protect Person: "Anthony Angel Dust"] away
>the next second, the building exploded

>"Yuri" spread its limbs wide, to maximize the cover it could provide for its charge and her associates
>Target: armored dirigible. Propulsion: rocket-augmented, 16-cylinder turboprop engines [x9], buoyancy deficit augmented by RAMjets [x6]. Armament: multi-caliber thermionic emitters [x3], bomb bay [capacity: 200], rotary machine guns [x4, caliber: 12.6mm]
>Target: anthropomorphic serpent, recognized as... "Court Magus": "Sir Pentious", monovisioned humaniod, recognized as "Acquaintance": "Cherri Bomb"

>recommended action....wait
>all it could do now
>is wait for the shock to pass
>its charge would then assess the danger, and deal with it, accordingly

>it missed its freedom
>its range, its speed, its effectiveness
>it missed its wings

>"Oh! A thousssssand appologiesssss, Princesssss!" Sir Pentious crowed "Jussssst... Got into an.... Altercassssshion, issssss al!"
>"Huh, so THAT'S what you call me taking both your peckers, huh?" came the voice of Cherri from somewhere behind him

>they were at it again
>Vaggie groaned, while they waited for the airship to touch down
>it wasn't the first time Angel's galpal had caused them trouble, and she knew it wouldn't be the last
>as soon as they'll see the repurposed Exterminator, they'll loose their sht
>she gave "Yuri" a pitying glance...
>...before realizing how stupid that was

>it said nothing while they argued
>or when the sinner called "Angel Dust" drew it to the side, to show its design to the seemingly impressed Cherri Bomb

>it simply wished for it to be over