use Net::IRC;
use Net::MySQL;
$server="someserver";
$chan="#somechan";
$tblname="tablename";
$botname="botname";
$mysql=Net::MySQL->new(hostname=>"localhost", database=>"database", user=>"user", password=>"password");
$irc=new Net::IRC;
$conn=$irc->newconn(Nick=>$botname, Server=>$server, Port=>6667, Ircname=>$botname, Username=>$botname);
$conn->add_global_handler('376',\&on_connect);
$conn->add_handler('public',\&on_public);
$irc->start();
sub on_connect{
          $self=$_[0];
          $self->join($chan);
}
sub on_public{
          ($self,$event)=@_;
          $text=$event->(args)[0];
          $nick=$event->nick;
          if($text=~/((what)|(wut)|(wat)|(whut)|(wtf))(( is)|('s)|(s)|( are)) ([^\?]+)\??/i){
                    $what=$12;
                    $mysql->query("SELECT * FROM $tblname WHERE what LIKE '%$what%'");
                    $set=$mysql->set_record_iterator();
                    while($record=$set->each()){
                              $who=$record->[0];
                              $isthis=$record->[2];
                              print "$who said $what is $isthis. ";
                    }
                    $self->privmsg($chan,$what);
          }elsif($text=~/ is /i){
                    @whatsthis=split(/ is /i,$text);
                    $what=$whatsthis[0];
                    $isthis=$whatsthis[1];
                    $mysql->query("INSERT INTO $tblname VALUES('$nick','$what','$ishis')");
          }
}