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Eng Springsteen on Broadway (2018)

Dec 25th, 2018
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  1. 1
  2. 00:00:29,237 --> 00:00:33,324
  3. DNA, your natural ability,
  4. the study of your craft,
  5.  
  6. 2
  7. 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:37,746
  8. a development of
  9. and devotion to an aesthetic philosophy.
  10.  
  11. 3
  12. 00:00:38,329 --> 00:00:39,247
  13. Balls.
  14.  
  15. 4
  16. 00:00:40,457 --> 00:00:43,793
  17. Naked desire for fame, love, adoration,
  18.  
  19. 5
  20. 00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:45,795
  21. attention, women,
  22.  
  23. 6
  24. 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,131
  25. sex, a buck.
  26.  
  27. 7
  28. 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:51,342
  29. Then, if you want to take it
  30. all the way out to the end of the night,
  31.  
  32. 8
  33. 00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:54,471
  34. you will need a furious fire
  35. in your belly
  36.  
  37. 9
  38. 00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:56,639
  39. that just don't quit burning.
  40.  
  41. 10
  42. 00:00:57,432 --> 00:01:01,478
  43. These are some of the elements
  44. that will come in handy
  45.  
  46. 11
  47. 00:01:02,228 --> 00:01:04,064
  48. should you come face-to-face
  49.  
  50. 12
  51. 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:07,317
  52. with 80,000 screaming rock 'n' roll fans.
  53.  
  54. 13
  55. 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:13,073
  56. Because these are fans who are waiting
  57. for you to pull something out of your hat,
  58.  
  59. 14
  60. 00:01:13,531 --> 00:01:16,493
  61. out of thin air,
  62. something out of this world.
  63.  
  64. 15
  65. 00:01:17,035 --> 00:01:19,954
  66. Something that, before the faithful
  67. were gathered here today,
  68.  
  69. 16
  70. 00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:21,998
  71. was just a song-fueled rumor.
  72.  
  73. 17
  74. 00:01:22,832 --> 00:01:24,793
  75. Now, I come from a boardwalk town
  76.  
  77. 18
  78. 00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:28,546
  79. where everything is tinged
  80. with just a bit of fraud.
  81.  
  82. 19
  83. 00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:34,552
  84. So am I.
  85.  
  86. 20
  87. 00:01:35,595 --> 00:01:38,765
  88. In 1972,
  89. I wasn't any race-car-driving rebel.
  90.  
  91. 21
  92. 00:01:38,848 --> 00:01:40,558
  93. I wasn't any corner street punk.
  94.  
  95. 22
  96. 00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:44,020
  97. I was a guitar player
  98. on the streets of Asbury Park.
  99.  
  100. 23
  101. 00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:47,941
  102. But I held four clean aces.
  103.  
  104. 24
  105. 00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:52,195
  106. I had youth, I had a decade
  107. of hard-core bar band experience
  108.  
  109. 25
  110. 00:01:52,278 --> 00:01:53,446
  111. already behind me.
  112.  
  113. 26
  114. 00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:55,907
  115. I had a great group of musicians
  116. and friends
  117.  
  118. 27
  119. 00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,993
  120. who really knew my playing style,
  121. and I had a magic trick.
  122.  
  123. 28
  124. 00:01:59,744 --> 00:02:02,872
  125. Now I'm here tonight
  126. to provide proof of life
  127.  
  128. 29
  129. 00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:06,501
  130. to that ever-elusive,
  131. never completely believable,
  132.  
  133. 30
  134. 00:02:06,584 --> 00:02:09,045
  135. particularly these days, us.
  136.  
  137. 31
  138. 00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:12,090
  139. That's my magic trick.
  140.  
  141. 32
  142. 00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:14,259
  143. And like all good magic tricks,
  144.  
  145. 33
  146. 00:02:14,342 --> 00:02:16,010
  147. it begins with a setup.
  148.  
  149. 34
  150. 00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:05,703
  151. Now, I've never held an honest job
  152. in my entire life.
  153.  
  154. 35
  155. 00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:09,457
  156. I've never done any hard labor.
  157.  
  158. 36
  159. 00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:12,377
  160. I've never worked nine to five.
  161.  
  162. 37
  163. 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:16,339
  164. I've never worked five days a week
  165. until right now.
  166.  
  167. 38
  168. 00:04:24,013 --> 00:04:26,140
  169. I don't like it.
  170.  
  171. 39
  172. 00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:31,396
  173. I've never seen the inside of a factory,
  174. and yet, it's all I've ever written about.
  175.  
  176. 40
  177. 00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:34,732
  178. Standing before you is a man
  179.  
  180. 41
  181. 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:38,403
  182. who has become wildly
  183. and absurdly successful
  184.  
  185. 42
  186. 00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:42,532
  187. writing about something
  188. of which he has had...
  189.  
  190. 43
  191. 00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:46,160
  192. absolutely no personal experience.
  193.  
  194. 44
  195. 00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:50,623
  196. I-- I made it all up.
  197.  
  198. 45
  199. 00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:53,918
  200. That's how good I am.
  201.  
  202. 46
  203. 00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:02,635
  204. Now, how?
  205.  
  206. 47
  207. 00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:07,181
  208. I'm sure you're wondering,
  209. how did this great miracle come to pass?
  210.  
  211. 48
  212. 00:05:08,057 --> 00:05:09,058
  213. Well...
  214.  
  215. 49
  216. 00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,311
  217. in the beginning...
  218.  
  219. 50
  220. 00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:15,064
  221. there was a great darkness
  222. upon the waters.
  223.  
  224. 51
  225. 00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:19,402
  226. As a child, there was Christmas,
  227. your birthday, summer vacation,
  228.  
  229. 52
  230. 00:05:19,944 --> 00:05:23,614
  231. but the rest of life was a lifeless,
  232. sucking black hole.
  233.  
  234. 53
  235. 00:05:24,615 --> 00:05:29,037
  236. A lifeless, sucking black hole
  237. of homework, church,
  238.  
  239. 54
  240. 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:32,206
  241. school, homework, church,
  242.  
  243. 55
  244. 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:35,752
  245. school, homework, church,
  246.  
  247. 56
  248. 00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:38,379
  249. school, green beans,
  250.  
  251. 57
  252. 00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:42,258
  253. green beans, fucking green beans.
  254.  
  255. 58
  256. 00:05:44,635 --> 00:05:49,515
  257. But then,
  258. in a blinding flash of sanctified light,
  259.  
  260. 59
  261. 00:05:49,974 --> 00:05:53,102
  262. a human being and just a kid,
  263.  
  264. 60
  265. 00:05:53,811 --> 00:05:55,772
  266. just a kid from the southern sticks.
  267.  
  268. 61
  269. 00:05:56,522 --> 00:06:01,444
  270. But, a... new kind of man.
  271. And he split the world in two.
  272.  
  273. 62
  274. 00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:02,945
  275. And suddenly...
  276.  
  277. 63
  278. 00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:05,615
  279. a new world existed.
  280.  
  281. 64
  282. 00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,453
  283. The one below your belt.
  284.  
  285. 65
  286. 00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:17,835
  287. And...
  288.  
  289. 66
  290. 00:06:18,503 --> 00:06:19,587
  291. above your heart.
  292.  
  293. 67
  294. 00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:22,799
  295. On a Sunday night in 1956,
  296.  
  297. 68
  298. 00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:26,344
  299. at 39 1/2 Institute Street,
  300. into a cold-water flat
  301.  
  302. 69
  303. 00:06:26,427 --> 00:06:28,763
  304. and into the mind of a seven-year-old kid.
  305.  
  306. 70
  307. 00:06:29,013 --> 00:06:32,100
  308. The revolution had been televised!
  309.  
  310. 71
  311. 00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,143
  312. Right under the noses
  313.  
  314. 72
  315. 00:06:34,477 --> 00:06:36,145
  316. of the powers that be!
  317.  
  318. 73
  319. 00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:39,774
  320. Who, if they'd have known
  321. what was actually happening
  322.  
  323. 74
  324. 00:06:39,857 --> 00:06:41,442
  325. and the great changes...
  326.  
  327. 75
  328. 00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:44,195
  329. the changes that were about to come,
  330.  
  331. 76
  332. 00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:47,615
  333. they would have shut this shit down.
  334.  
  335. 77
  336. 00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:52,036
  337. Or more likely signed it up real quick.
  338.  
  339. 78
  340. 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:57,250
  341. Because we, the unwashed,
  342. the invisible, the powerless, the kids,
  343.  
  344. 79
  345. 00:06:57,333 --> 00:07:00,002
  346. would want more.
  347.  
  348. 80
  349. 00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,381
  350. Now more life...
  351.  
  352. 81
  353. 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:07,343
  354. more love and more sex
  355. and more hope...
  356.  
  357. 82
  358. 00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:09,095
  359. and more truth...
  360.  
  361. 83
  362. 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,013
  363. and more power.
  364.  
  365. 84
  366. 00:07:12,056 --> 00:07:13,474
  367. And more soul.
  368.  
  369. 85
  370. 00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:17,186
  371. And most of all, more rock 'n' roll.
  372.  
  373. 86
  374. 00:07:24,068 --> 00:07:27,572
  375. So I sat with my mom,
  376. my little seven-year-old mind on fire,
  377.  
  378. 87
  379. 00:07:28,030 --> 00:07:31,451
  380. staring into a blue tube as fun happened.
  381.  
  382. 88
  383. 00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:34,620
  384. Fun, the real kind.
  385.  
  386. 89
  387. 00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:37,498
  388. The joyful, life-affirming, hip-shaking,
  389.  
  390. 90
  391. 00:07:37,582 --> 00:07:39,584
  392. ass-quaking, guitar-playing,
  393.  
  394. 91
  395. 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:44,422
  396. mind- and heart-changing,
  397. race-challenging, soul-lifting bliss
  398.  
  399. 92
  400. 00:07:44,505 --> 00:07:46,466
  401. of a freer existence.
  402.  
  403. 93
  404. 00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:53,806
  405. A freer existence exploded
  406. into unsuspecting homes
  407.  
  408. 94
  409. 00:07:54,182 --> 00:07:55,725
  410. all across America.
  411.  
  412. 95
  413. 00:07:56,225 --> 00:07:57,894
  414. On a regular Sunday night.
  415.  
  416. 96
  417. 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:02,565
  418. The world had fucking changed.
  419.  
  420. 97
  421. 00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:05,067
  422. In an instant.
  423.  
  424. 98
  425. 00:08:06,235 --> 00:08:10,364
  426. In a sweating, wet orgasm of fun.
  427.  
  428. 99
  429. 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:14,118
  430. And all you needed to do
  431.  
  432. 100
  433. 00:08:14,702 --> 00:08:16,162
  434. to get a taste of it...
  435.  
  436. 101
  437. 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,624
  438. was to risk being your true self.
  439.  
  440. 102
  441. 00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:26,255
  442. Because a rock 'n' roll genie
  443. had been let out of the bottle
  444.  
  445. 103
  446. 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,716
  447. and he told us that if you were...
  448.  
  449. 104
  450. 00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:36,474
  451. ...my fellow citizens,
  452. these feelings, these freedoms,
  453.  
  454. 105
  455. 00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:38,351
  456. this fun...
  457.  
  458. 106
  459. 00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:41,062
  460. was your birthright.
  461.  
  462. 107
  463. 00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:45,274
  464. I listened, I believed,
  465. and I heard a mighty call
  466.  
  467. 108
  468. 00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:46,943
  469. to action.
  470.  
  471. 109
  472. 00:08:47,944 --> 00:08:50,780
  473. So I studied my new hero.
  474.  
  475. 110
  476. 00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:55,117
  477. I know today he's got the same
  478. two arms, two legs, two eyes that I got.
  479.  
  480. 111
  481. 00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:58,079
  482. Yes, he's a human Adonis.
  483.  
  484. 112
  485. 00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:00,373
  486. And I'm...
  487.  
  488. 113
  489. 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,757
  490. ...pathetically creepy.
  491.  
  492. 114
  493. 00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,844
  494. But I'll figure that part out, all right?
  495.  
  496. 115
  497. 00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:16,180
  498. The one thing he had
  499. that I didn't have was strapped
  500.  
  501. 116
  502. 00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:17,557
  503. around his waist.
  504.  
  505. 117
  506. 00:09:17,848 --> 00:09:19,350
  507. It was the guitar!
  508.  
  509. 118
  510. 00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:22,770
  511. The guitar,
  512. or as my father had christened it,
  513.  
  514. 119
  515. 00:09:22,853 --> 00:09:24,730
  516. "that fucking guitar."
  517.  
  518. 120
  519. 00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:28,693
  520. But that fucking guitar was the key!
  521.  
  522. 121
  523. 00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,862
  524. It was the sword in the stone!
  525.  
  526. 122
  527. 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:35,575
  528. It was the staff of righteousness!
  529.  
  530. 123
  531. 00:09:36,284 --> 00:09:39,579
  532. And they sell 'em
  533. at Western Auto downtown
  534.  
  535. 124
  536. 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,998
  537. for 25 dollars!
  538.  
  539. 125
  540. 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:46,544
  541. So I begged and I pleaded with my mother
  542.  
  543. 126
  544. 00:09:46,627 --> 00:09:49,338
  545. just to rent me,
  546. 'cause we couldn't afford to buy,
  547.  
  548. 127
  549. 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:52,717
  550. a guitar from Mike Diehl's Music School
  551. on South Street.
  552.  
  553. 128
  554. 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:56,012
  555. One Saturday afternoon,
  556. I brought it home.
  557.  
  558. 129
  559. 00:09:57,388 --> 00:10:00,099
  560. And I sat on the living room couch,
  561.  
  562. 130
  563. 00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:04,186
  564. and I unlatched its full alligator case,
  565.  
  566. 131
  567. 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:08,065
  568. and I slowly opened it up,
  569.  
  570. 132
  571. 00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:12,862
  572. and up from the green velvet lining...
  573.  
  574. 133
  575. 00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:15,656
  576. came the sweet smell...
  577.  
  578. 134
  579. 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:19,952
  580. of a cherry wood cocktail of power,
  581.  
  582. 135
  583. 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,164
  584. pleasure, salvation,
  585.  
  586. 136
  587. 00:10:23,831 --> 00:10:26,959
  588. dreams, and dreams and dreams.
  589.  
  590. 137
  591. 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:31,213
  592. So I took lessons, dedicatedly.
  593.  
  594. 138
  595. 00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:35,134
  596. I took lessons for two solid weeks...
  597.  
  598. 139
  599. 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:40,681
  600. and I quit.
  601.  
  602. 140
  603. 00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:43,809
  604. It was too fucking hard.
  605.  
  606. 141
  607. 00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:48,606
  608. Learning the guitar,
  609. not only was it fucking hard,
  610.  
  611. 142
  612. 00:10:48,939 --> 00:10:51,442
  613. but the lessons were boring!
  614.  
  615. 143
  616. 00:10:51,525 --> 00:10:55,529
  617. Just give me the three magic chords,
  618. please!
  619.  
  620. 144
  621. 00:10:55,863 --> 00:10:57,531
  622. And let me twist...
  623.  
  624. 145
  625. 00:10:58,282 --> 00:10:59,367
  626. and shout!
  627.  
  628. 146
  629. 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:04,955
  630. But I was a seven-year-old kid
  631. and my hands barely fit around the neck
  632.  
  633. 147
  634. 00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:08,834
  635. and I couldn't waste my mother's
  636. hard-earned cash week after week,
  637.  
  638. 148
  639. 00:11:09,251 --> 00:11:13,756
  640. so very shortly, I knew.
  641. That back it was gonna have to go.
  642.  
  643. 149
  644. 00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:18,969
  645. But the morning before I returned it,
  646. I strapped it on one more time.
  647.  
  648. 150
  649. 00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:24,225
  650. I took it out into the backyard
  651. where the neighborhood kids were,
  652.  
  653. 151
  654. 00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:27,770
  655. and I put on my first show.
  656.  
  657. 152
  658. 00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:30,690
  659. Whoo!
  660.  
  661. 153
  662. 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,859
  663. I slapped it, I shook it, I shouted,
  664.  
  665. 154
  666. 00:11:33,943 --> 00:11:35,903
  667. I sang voodoo nonsense.
  668.  
  669. 155
  670. 00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:38,155
  671. I burned a hole in the grass,
  672.  
  673. 156
  674. 00:11:38,572 --> 00:11:41,325
  675. I shook my little seven-year-old ass.
  676.  
  677. 157
  678. 00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:48,374
  679. Most importantly, I posed with it!
  680.  
  681. 158
  682. 00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:50,876
  683. That's the shit!
  684.  
  685. 159
  686. 00:11:55,172 --> 00:12:00,261
  687. I danced with it,
  688. I did everything but play it.
  689.  
  690. 160
  691. 00:12:01,429 --> 00:12:02,972
  692. I couldn't do that.
  693.  
  694. 161
  695. 00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:07,226
  696. I sucked so bad and the kids laughed
  697. and laughed and laughed
  698.  
  699. 162
  700. 00:12:07,309 --> 00:12:08,644
  701. at my silly ass.
  702.  
  703. 163
  704. 00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:11,731
  705. And we brought it back that afternoon.
  706.  
  707. 164
  708. 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:16,026
  709. But riding back home
  710. with my mom in the car...
  711.  
  712. 165
  713. 00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:18,988
  714. I sat in the backseat and I was quiet.
  715.  
  716. 166
  717. 00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:20,823
  718. I was thinking...
  719.  
  720. 167
  721. 00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:25,578
  722. I was a little disappointed in myself.
  723.  
  724. 168
  725. 00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:29,415
  726. But somewhere inside...
  727.  
  728. 169
  729. 00:12:30,583 --> 00:12:33,586
  730. somewhere inside,
  731. I knew that for a moment,
  732.  
  733. 170
  734. 00:12:34,795 --> 00:12:36,338
  735. just a moment,
  736.  
  737. 171
  738. 00:12:37,590 --> 00:12:39,884
  739. in front of those kids in that backyard...
  740.  
  741. 172
  742. 00:12:42,052 --> 00:12:44,764
  743. Mm... I smelled blood.
  744.  
  745. 173
  746. 00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,330
  747. And it was bye-bye, New Jersey,
  748.  
  749. 174
  750. 00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:57,211
  751. I'm gonna be airborne!
  752.  
  753. 175
  754. 00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:18,023
  755. Now, everybody...
  756.  
  757. 176
  758. 00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:21,402
  759. everybody has a love-hate relationship
  760. with their hometown.
  761.  
  762. 177
  763. 00:14:22,903 --> 00:14:25,322
  764. It's just built into the equation
  765. of growing up.
  766.  
  767. 178
  768. 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:27,283
  769. If you take me.
  770.  
  771. 179
  772. 00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:29,994
  773. I'm Mr. Born to Run.
  774.  
  775. 180
  776. 00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:34,081
  777. I'm Mr. Thunder fucking Road.
  778.  
  779. 181
  780. 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,668
  781. I was born...
  782.  
  783. 182
  784. 00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:40,754
  785. to run, not to stay.
  786.  
  787. 183
  788. 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,425
  789. My home, New Jersey...
  790.  
  791. 184
  792. 00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:51,181
  793. it's a death trap.
  794.  
  795. 185
  796. 00:14:56,562 --> 00:14:58,564
  797. It's a suicide rap.
  798.  
  799. 186
  800. 00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:02,151
  801. Listen to the lyrics, all right?
  802.  
  803. 187
  804. 00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:05,029
  805. I gotta get out, I gotta hit the highway,
  806.  
  807. 188
  808. 00:15:05,112 --> 00:15:09,033
  809. I'm a road running man,
  810. I got the white line fever in my veins.
  811.  
  812. 189
  813. 00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:12,620
  814. I am gonna bring my girl
  815. and I have had enough
  816.  
  817. 190
  818. 00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,789
  819. of the shit that this place dishes out.
  820.  
  821. 191
  822. 00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:20,210
  823. I am gonna run, run, run, and I'm...
  824.  
  825. 192
  826. 00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:23,088
  827. well, I'm never coming back.
  828.  
  829. 193
  830. 00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:26,634
  831. I currently live ten minutes
  832. from my hometown.
  833.  
  834. 194
  835. 00:15:35,935 --> 00:15:38,312
  836. But, uh... "Born to Come Back" or, uh...
  837.  
  838. 195
  839. 00:15:38,812 --> 00:15:41,440
  840. Who would have bought that shit?
  841.  
  842. 196
  843. 00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:42,900
  844. Nobody.
  845.  
  846. 197
  847. 00:15:43,567 --> 00:15:45,402
  848. Nobody, nobody.
  849.  
  850. 198
  851. 00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:53,953
  852. In our front yard,
  853. only a few feet from our porch
  854.  
  855. 199
  856. 00:15:54,036 --> 00:15:56,205
  857. stood the grandest tree in town.
  858.  
  859. 200
  860. 00:15:56,830 --> 00:16:00,292
  861. It was a towering,
  862. beautiful copper beech tree.
  863.  
  864. 201
  865. 00:16:00,876 --> 00:16:04,755
  866. And on sunny days,
  867. I lived under its branches.
  868.  
  869. 202
  870. 00:16:04,838 --> 00:16:09,760
  871. Its roots were a fort for my soldiers
  872. and a corral for my horses.
  873.  
  874. 203
  875. 00:16:10,552 --> 00:16:12,846
  876. And I was the first on my block
  877.  
  878. 204
  879. 00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:16,308
  880. to climb high into its upper reaches,
  881.  
  882. 205
  883. 00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:19,478
  884. leaving behind a world that...
  885.  
  886. 206
  887. 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:23,273
  888. I didn't care for much already.
  889.  
  890. 207
  891. 00:16:25,109 --> 00:16:27,736
  892. And up near the top,
  893. I had the wind in my face
  894.  
  895. 208
  896. 00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:29,947
  897. and I had all the dreaming room
  898.  
  899. 209
  900. 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:32,074
  901. that you could want.
  902.  
  903. 210
  904. 00:16:33,367 --> 00:16:36,036
  905. On slow summer nights,
  906. I'd sit beneath its arms
  907.  
  908. 211
  909. 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,622
  910. with my pals like the cavalry at dusk,
  911.  
  912. 212
  913. 00:16:39,623 --> 00:16:41,750
  914. just listening and listening...
  915.  
  916. 213
  917. 00:16:42,751 --> 00:16:45,212
  918. for the evening bells
  919. of the ice cream man,
  920.  
  921. 214
  922. 00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:49,425
  923. and my grandmother's voice
  924. calling me in to bed.
  925.  
  926. 215
  927. 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:54,430
  928. I lived on Randolph Street
  929. with my sister, Virginia,
  930.  
  931. 216
  932. 00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:57,057
  933. she was a year younger than me,
  934.  
  935. 217
  936. 00:16:57,141 --> 00:17:00,602
  937. my parents, Adele and Douglas,
  938. my grandparents, Fred and Alice,
  939.  
  940. 218
  941. 00:17:00,686 --> 00:17:03,981
  942. and my trusty dog Saddle.
  943.  
  944. 219
  945. 00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:09,403
  946. We lived spitting distance
  947. from the Catholic Church,
  948.  
  949. 220
  950. 00:17:09,486 --> 00:17:11,822
  951. the priest's rectory, the nuns' convent,
  952.  
  953. 221
  954. 00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:14,950
  955. the St. Rose of Lima Grammar School,
  956. all of it
  957.  
  958. 222
  959. 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,244
  960. just a football's toss away,
  961.  
  962. 223
  963. 00:17:17,786 --> 00:17:19,913
  964. across a field of wild grass.
  965.  
  966. 224
  967. 00:17:19,997 --> 00:17:24,168
  968. I literally grew up surrounded by God.
  969.  
  970. 225
  971. 00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:28,464
  972. Surrounded by God...
  973.  
  974. 226
  975. 00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,550
  976. and my relatives.
  977.  
  978. 227
  979. 00:17:32,509 --> 00:17:35,471
  980. 'Cause we had cousins
  981. and aunts and uncles
  982.  
  983. 228
  984. 00:17:35,554 --> 00:17:37,306
  985. and grandmas and grandpas
  986.  
  987. 229
  988. 00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:39,683
  989. and great-grandmas and great-grandpas,
  990.  
  991. 230
  992. 00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:43,520
  993. all of us were jammed
  994. into five little houses
  995.  
  996. 231
  997. 00:17:43,604 --> 00:17:45,272
  998. on two adjoining streets.
  999.  
  1000. 232
  1001. 00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:49,610
  1002. And when the church bells rang,
  1003. the whole clan would hustle up the street
  1004.  
  1005. 233
  1006. 00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:54,865
  1007. to stand witness to every wedding
  1008. and every funeral
  1009.  
  1010. 234
  1011. 00:17:54,948 --> 00:17:57,576
  1012. that arrived like a state occasion
  1013.  
  1014. 235
  1015. 00:17:58,160 --> 00:17:59,745
  1016. in our little neighborhood.
  1017.  
  1018. 236
  1019. 00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:04,958
  1020. My sister and I, we'd pick up
  1021. the thrown rice from the weddings,
  1022.  
  1023. 237
  1024. 00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:09,713
  1025. pack it away in small brown paper bags
  1026. and take it home and save it,
  1027.  
  1028. 238
  1029. 00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:13,717
  1030. and run up the street and throw it
  1031. at the next wedding...
  1032.  
  1033. 239
  1034. 00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:15,677
  1035. and the next wedding...
  1036.  
  1037. 240
  1038. 00:18:16,678 --> 00:18:18,222
  1039. and the next wedding.
  1040.  
  1041. 241
  1042. 00:18:19,723 --> 00:18:22,601
  1043. We also had front row seats
  1044. to watch the townsmen
  1045.  
  1046. 242
  1047. 00:18:22,684 --> 00:18:26,271
  1048. in their Sunday suits carry out
  1049. an endless array...
  1050.  
  1051. 243
  1052. 00:18:27,606 --> 00:18:29,399
  1053. of dark wooden boxes
  1054.  
  1055. 244
  1056. 00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:33,779
  1057. to be slipped into the rear
  1058. of the Freeman's Funeral Home
  1059.  
  1060. 245
  1061. 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,949
  1062. long black Cadillac
  1063.  
  1064. 246
  1065. 00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:39,201
  1066. for the short ride
  1067.  
  1068. 247
  1069. 00:18:39,868 --> 00:18:42,913
  1070. to St. Rose Cemetery hill
  1071. on the edge of town.
  1072.  
  1073. 248
  1074. 00:18:43,580 --> 00:18:44,623
  1075. And there...
  1076.  
  1077. 249
  1078. 00:18:45,624 --> 00:18:47,918
  1079. all our Catholic neighbors,
  1080. all the Zerillis,
  1081.  
  1082. 250
  1083. 00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:51,588
  1084. all the McNicholases,
  1085. all the Springsteens who came before...
  1086.  
  1087. 251
  1088. 00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,842
  1089. they patiently waited for us.
  1090.  
  1091. 252
  1092. 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,386
  1093. On Sundays,
  1094.  
  1095. 253
  1096. 00:18:58,762 --> 00:19:01,140
  1097. as my mom tended to our graves,
  1098.  
  1099. 254
  1100. 00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:02,766
  1101. my sister and I...
  1102.  
  1103. 255
  1104. 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:07,437
  1105. we played hide-and-seek
  1106. amongst the gravestones.
  1107.  
  1108. 256
  1109. 00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:11,817
  1110. I gotcha.
  1111.  
  1112. 257
  1113. 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,445
  1114. Now, when it rains in Freehold...
  1115.  
  1116. 258
  1117. 00:19:16,697 --> 00:19:18,282
  1118. When it rains,
  1119.  
  1120. 259
  1121. 00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:22,661
  1122. the moisture in the humid air
  1123. blankets the whole town
  1124.  
  1125. 260
  1126. 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:27,708
  1127. with the smell of moist coffee grounds
  1128. wafting in from the Nescafé plant
  1129.  
  1130. 261
  1131. 00:19:27,791 --> 00:19:29,459
  1132. on the town's eastern edge.
  1133.  
  1134. 262
  1135. 00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:31,879
  1136. Now, I don't like coffee,
  1137.  
  1138. 263
  1139. 00:19:33,881 --> 00:19:35,716
  1140. but I loved that smell.
  1141.  
  1142. 264
  1143. 00:19:37,134 --> 00:19:40,888
  1144. It was comforting. It united our town,
  1145.  
  1146. 265
  1147. 00:19:41,471 --> 00:19:43,765
  1148. just like our clanging rug mill,
  1149.  
  1150. 266
  1151. 00:19:44,349 --> 00:19:48,020
  1152. in a common sensory experience.
  1153. There was a place here.
  1154.  
  1155. 267
  1156. 00:19:48,103 --> 00:19:51,064
  1157. You could hear it, you could smell it.
  1158.  
  1159. 268
  1160. 00:19:52,232 --> 00:19:54,693
  1161. A place where people made lives
  1162.  
  1163. 269
  1164. 00:19:54,776 --> 00:19:57,237
  1165. and where they worked
  1166. and where they danced
  1167.  
  1168. 270
  1169. 00:19:57,321 --> 00:20:02,075
  1170. and where they enjoyed small pleasures
  1171. and played baseball and...
  1172.  
  1173. 271
  1174. 00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:04,870
  1175. and suffered pain.
  1176.  
  1177. 272
  1178. 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:08,498
  1179. Where they had their hearts broke
  1180.  
  1181. 273
  1182. 00:20:09,708 --> 00:20:11,376
  1183. and where they made love,
  1184.  
  1185. 274
  1186. 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,296
  1187. had kids...
  1188.  
  1189. 275
  1190. 00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:17,841
  1191. where they died...
  1192.  
  1193. 276
  1194. 00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:23,931
  1195. and drank themselves drunk
  1196. on spring nights.
  1197.  
  1198. 277
  1199. 00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:28,060
  1200. And where they did their very best,
  1201.  
  1202. 278
  1203. 00:20:29,770 --> 00:20:31,063
  1204. the best that they could,
  1205.  
  1206. 279
  1207. 00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:37,027
  1208. to hold off the demons,
  1209. outside and inside,
  1210.  
  1211. 280
  1212. 00:20:38,278 --> 00:20:40,030
  1213. that sought to destroy them...
  1214.  
  1215. 281
  1216. 00:20:42,449 --> 00:20:44,910
  1217. and their homes, their families,
  1218.  
  1219. 282
  1220. 00:20:47,704 --> 00:20:49,164
  1221. and their town.
  1222.  
  1223. 283
  1224. 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:02,386
  1225. Here, we lived in the shadow
  1226. of the steeple,
  1227.  
  1228. 284
  1229. 00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:06,098
  1230. crookedly blessed in God's good mercy,
  1231. one and all.
  1232.  
  1233. 285
  1234. 00:21:07,182 --> 00:21:10,060
  1235. In the heart-stopping, pants-dropping,
  1236.  
  1237. 286
  1238. 00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:13,397
  1239. race-rioting, freak-hating,
  1240.  
  1241. 287
  1242. 00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,566
  1243. soul-shaking, redneck,
  1244.  
  1245. 288
  1246. 00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:19,653
  1247. love-and-fear-making,
  1248.  
  1249. 289
  1250. 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:22,948
  1251. heartbreaking town...
  1252.  
  1253. 290
  1254. 00:21:26,034 --> 00:21:28,036
  1255. of Freehold, New Jersey.
  1256.  
  1257. 291
  1258. 00:25:36,868 --> 00:25:39,579
  1259. My father worked
  1260. as a 16-year-old floor boy
  1261.  
  1262. 292
  1263. 00:25:39,663 --> 00:25:40,872
  1264. in that rug mill.
  1265.  
  1266. 293
  1267. 00:25:40,956 --> 00:25:44,376
  1268. And then he went off to war.
  1269. When he came home, he got married.
  1270.  
  1271. 294
  1272. 00:25:45,043 --> 00:25:47,337
  1273. They shut the rug mill down,
  1274. and so he went to work
  1275.  
  1276. 295
  1277. 00:25:47,420 --> 00:25:49,548
  1278. on the Ford Motor plant line
  1279. in New Brunswick.
  1280.  
  1281. 296
  1282. 00:25:49,631 --> 00:25:52,384
  1283. Then he worked at the Nescafé plant
  1284. in Freehold,
  1285.  
  1286. 297
  1287. 00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:55,095
  1288. worked in a plastics factory in town.
  1289.  
  1290. 298
  1291. 00:25:55,178 --> 00:25:58,557
  1292. He was a truck driver, a bus driver,
  1293. drove a taxi.
  1294.  
  1295. 299
  1296. 00:25:58,932 --> 00:26:01,518
  1297. He lived mostly at home,
  1298. except for his second home,
  1299.  
  1300. 300
  1301. 00:26:01,601 --> 00:26:04,104
  1302. which was a little local bar
  1303. in the center of town.
  1304.  
  1305. 301
  1306. 00:26:05,105 --> 00:26:10,860
  1307. Now, to a child, bars in Freehold
  1308. were these citadels of great mystery.
  1309.  
  1310. 302
  1311. 00:26:12,153 --> 00:26:14,781
  1312. When you walked through barroom doors
  1313. in my hometown,
  1314.  
  1315. 303
  1316. 00:26:14,864 --> 00:26:16,825
  1317. you entered the mystical realm of men.
  1318.  
  1319. 304
  1320. 00:26:17,450 --> 00:26:20,954
  1321. On the rare night
  1322. that my mother would call my father home,
  1323.  
  1324. 305
  1325. 00:26:21,580 --> 00:26:24,249
  1326. we would slowly drive through town
  1327. until we drew to a stop
  1328.  
  1329. 306
  1330. 00:26:24,332 --> 00:26:25,917
  1331. outside of a single lit door.
  1332.  
  1333. 307
  1334. 00:26:26,001 --> 00:26:28,878
  1335. She'd look at me and say,
  1336. "Go in and get your dad."
  1337.  
  1338. 308
  1339. 00:26:30,171 --> 00:26:33,008
  1340. This both thrilled and terrified me.
  1341.  
  1342. 309
  1343. 00:26:33,758 --> 00:26:36,886
  1344. Thrilled me,
  1345. because I had been given the license
  1346.  
  1347. 310
  1348. 00:26:36,970 --> 00:26:37,846
  1349. by my mother,
  1350.  
  1351. 311
  1352. 00:26:38,388 --> 00:26:40,807
  1353. the law...
  1354.  
  1355. 312
  1356. 00:26:40,890 --> 00:26:42,934
  1357. ...to go into the bar!
  1358.  
  1359. 313
  1360. 00:26:43,935 --> 00:26:45,061
  1361. I'm a kid!
  1362.  
  1363. 314
  1364. 00:26:46,313 --> 00:26:48,189
  1365. But it terrified me,
  1366.  
  1367. 315
  1368. 00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:50,358
  1369. because to enter the bar
  1370.  
  1371. 316
  1372. 00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:56,948
  1373. is to enter my father's privileged,
  1374. private, and sacred space.
  1375.  
  1376. 317
  1377. 00:26:57,490 --> 00:27:02,412
  1378. He was not to be disturbed
  1379. when he's down at the bar.
  1380.  
  1381. 318
  1382. 00:27:03,079 --> 00:27:05,665
  1383. Everybody knew that.
  1384.  
  1385. 319
  1386. 00:27:05,749 --> 00:27:07,208
  1387. So, I would walk in.
  1388.  
  1389. 320
  1390. 00:27:07,584 --> 00:27:11,588
  1391. And I was waist-high, and like a Jack
  1392. who climbed some dark beanstalk
  1393.  
  1394. 321
  1395. 00:27:11,671 --> 00:27:12,714
  1396. into a land of giants,
  1397.  
  1398. 322
  1399. 00:27:12,797 --> 00:27:16,635
  1400. all I remember is the men towering
  1401. over me on their way out the door.
  1402.  
  1403. 323
  1404. 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:19,346
  1405. Now, once you were in,
  1406. to the left against the wall
  1407.  
  1408. 324
  1409. 00:27:19,429 --> 00:27:22,057
  1410. was a line of red leather booths
  1411.  
  1412. 325
  1413. 00:27:22,140 --> 00:27:24,934
  1414. that were filled
  1415. with husband and wife tag team drinkers.
  1416.  
  1417. 326
  1418. 00:27:25,185 --> 00:27:27,687
  1419. Now, they were your hard-core regulars,
  1420.  
  1421. 327
  1422. 00:27:27,771 --> 00:27:30,482
  1423. there night after night
  1424. after night, all right?
  1425.  
  1426. 328
  1427. 00:27:30,565 --> 00:27:32,651
  1428. Now, to the right was the bar,
  1429.  
  1430. 329
  1431. 00:27:33,151 --> 00:27:37,447
  1432. a line of stools filled by a barricade
  1433. of broad working-class backs,
  1434.  
  1435. 330
  1436. 00:27:37,530 --> 00:27:41,618
  1437. clinking glasses, too loud laughter,
  1438. and very few women.
  1439.  
  1440. 331
  1441. 00:27:41,701 --> 00:27:46,081
  1442. I would stand there lost in the noise
  1443. and the hustle of the crowd
  1444.  
  1445. 332
  1446. 00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:50,251
  1447. and I would drink in
  1448. that dim smell of beer
  1449.  
  1450. 333
  1451. 00:27:50,335 --> 00:27:53,046
  1452. and booze and aftershave.
  1453.  
  1454. 334
  1455. 00:27:53,129 --> 00:27:58,051
  1456. That, to a kid,
  1457. that was the scent of adulthood.
  1458.  
  1459. 335
  1460. 00:27:58,510 --> 00:28:01,471
  1461. It was the scent of manhood.
  1462.  
  1463. 336
  1464. 00:28:02,430 --> 00:28:04,599
  1465. I wanted some of that, you know?
  1466.  
  1467. 337
  1468. 00:28:05,016 --> 00:28:09,062
  1469. Finally, somebody would notice me
  1470. and draw me over to my pop.
  1471.  
  1472. 338
  1473. 00:28:09,145 --> 00:28:11,606
  1474. Now, my view from the floor
  1475. was the first thing I'd see
  1476.  
  1477. 339
  1478. 00:28:11,690 --> 00:28:13,817
  1479. is the chrome legs of the barstool.
  1480.  
  1481. 340
  1482. 00:28:13,900 --> 00:28:17,529
  1483. Then I'd see his black shoes,
  1484. white socks, dark green work trousers,
  1485.  
  1486. 341
  1487. 00:28:17,612 --> 00:28:19,072
  1488. powerful legs and haunches.
  1489.  
  1490. 342
  1491. 00:28:19,155 --> 00:28:22,951
  1492. My dad, till the day he died,
  1493. had the legs and an ass of a rhinoceros.
  1494.  
  1495. 343
  1496. 00:28:24,285 --> 00:28:27,789
  1497. And-- and his trousers always looked
  1498. like they were stretched,
  1499.  
  1500. 344
  1501. 00:28:27,872 --> 00:28:31,918
  1502. stretched over those legs and ass somehow.
  1503. I don't know how.
  1504.  
  1505. 345
  1506. 00:28:32,836 --> 00:28:34,921
  1507. He was always busting out, you know?
  1508.  
  1509. 346
  1510. 00:28:35,296 --> 00:28:38,299
  1511. Uh, then I would see
  1512. his black Garrison work belt,
  1513.  
  1514. 347
  1515. 00:28:38,383 --> 00:28:40,093
  1516. his green work shirt, and then his face.
  1517.  
  1518. 348
  1519. 00:28:40,176 --> 00:28:42,679
  1520. By the time I got there,
  1521. his face was flushed red,
  1522.  
  1523. 349
  1524. 00:28:43,430 --> 00:28:45,849
  1525. red as a tomato because he was Irish,
  1526.  
  1527. 350
  1528. 00:28:45,932 --> 00:28:49,227
  1529. and whatever he drank
  1530. went straight to his face.
  1531.  
  1532. 351
  1533. 00:28:49,936 --> 00:28:54,274
  1534. All right? He couldn't hide a thing
  1535. when he came home, you know? Uh...
  1536.  
  1537. 352
  1538. 00:28:54,899 --> 00:28:57,736
  1539. And not only was it red,
  1540. but it was like...
  1541.  
  1542. 353
  1543. 00:28:57,902 --> 00:29:03,867
  1544. ...it was, like, distorted, too,
  1545. into some sort of booze mask, you know,
  1546.  
  1547. 354
  1548. 00:29:03,950 --> 00:29:07,120
  1549. by... by Mr. Schlitz and-- and...
  1550.  
  1551. 355
  1552. 00:29:07,871 --> 00:29:12,500
  1553. It was so foreign to me as a child that,
  1554. uh...
  1555.  
  1556. 356
  1557. 00:29:15,044 --> 00:29:16,337
  1558. He...
  1559.  
  1560. 357
  1561. 00:29:18,089 --> 00:29:19,966
  1562. Fuck, I don't know!
  1563.  
  1564. 358
  1565. 00:29:20,049 --> 00:29:23,887
  1566. But it was scary, and he'd be peering
  1567. down over his shoulder,
  1568.  
  1569. 359
  1570. 00:29:24,220 --> 00:29:27,348
  1571. down through cigarette smoke
  1572. and he'd be looking at me like,
  1573.  
  1574. 360
  1575. 00:29:28,016 --> 00:29:30,477
  1576. "I've never seen you before
  1577. in my fuckin' life."
  1578.  
  1579. 361
  1580. 00:29:36,816 --> 00:29:40,028
  1581. I'd then uttered the immortal words
  1582. that I was sent to deliver,
  1583.  
  1584. 362
  1585. 00:29:41,196 --> 00:29:42,906
  1586. "Mom wants you to come home."
  1587.  
  1588. 363
  1589. 00:29:45,825 --> 00:29:50,121
  1590. I'd hear, "Go outside.
  1591. I will be right out."
  1592.  
  1593. 364
  1594. 00:29:50,580 --> 00:29:54,375
  1595. And I would follow my breadcrumb trail
  1596. back out the barroom door,
  1597.  
  1598. 365
  1599. 00:29:54,709 --> 00:29:59,506
  1600. I would hop into the backseat
  1601. and I would inform my mother...
  1602.  
  1603. 366
  1604. 00:30:02,425 --> 00:30:05,470
  1605. "Um, he'll be right out.
  1606. He'll be right out."
  1607.  
  1608. 367
  1609. 00:33:31,843 --> 00:33:35,221
  1610. Now, those whose love we wanted
  1611. but didn't get,
  1612.  
  1613. 368
  1614. 00:33:36,180 --> 00:33:37,473
  1615. we emulate them.
  1616.  
  1617. 369
  1618. 00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:41,769
  1619. It's the only way we have in our power
  1620.  
  1621. 370
  1622. 00:33:43,479 --> 00:33:46,983
  1623. to get the closeness and the love
  1624. that we needed and desired.
  1625.  
  1626. 371
  1627. 00:33:47,442 --> 00:33:49,861
  1628. So, when I was a young man
  1629. and looking for a voice
  1630.  
  1631. 372
  1632. 00:33:49,944 --> 00:33:53,948
  1633. to meld with mine, to sing my songs,
  1634. and to tell my stories,
  1635.  
  1636. 373
  1637. 00:33:54,032 --> 00:33:56,075
  1638. well, I chose my father's voice.
  1639.  
  1640. 374
  1641. 00:33:58,578 --> 00:34:01,205
  1642. Because there was something sacred
  1643. in it to me.
  1644.  
  1645. 375
  1646. 00:34:02,540 --> 00:34:05,001
  1647. When I went looking for something to wear,
  1648.  
  1649. 376
  1650. 00:34:05,460 --> 00:34:07,879
  1651. I put on a factory worker's clothes,
  1652.  
  1653. 377
  1654. 00:34:08,504 --> 00:34:10,590
  1655. because they were my dad's clothes.
  1656.  
  1657. 378
  1658. 00:34:14,177 --> 00:34:17,013
  1659. And all we know about manhood
  1660. is what we have seen
  1661.  
  1662. 379
  1663. 00:34:17,096 --> 00:34:18,306
  1664. and what we have learned
  1665.  
  1666. 380
  1667. 00:34:18,389 --> 00:34:22,477
  1668. from our fathers,
  1669. and my father was my hero
  1670.  
  1671. 381
  1672. 00:34:23,895 --> 00:34:25,396
  1673. and my greatest foe.
  1674.  
  1675. 382
  1676. 00:34:28,524 --> 00:34:31,819
  1677. Not long after he died, I had this dream.
  1678.  
  1679. 383
  1680. 00:34:31,903 --> 00:34:33,946
  1681. I'm on stage,
  1682. I'm in front of thousands of people
  1683.  
  1684. 384
  1685. 00:34:34,030 --> 00:34:37,075
  1686. and my dad's back from the dead,
  1687. and he's sitting in the audience.
  1688.  
  1689. 385
  1690. 00:34:37,158 --> 00:34:40,203
  1691. And suddenly, I'm kneeling next to him
  1692. in the aisle.
  1693.  
  1694. 386
  1695. 00:34:41,287 --> 00:34:45,166
  1696. And for a moment,
  1697. we both watch the man on fire on stage.
  1698.  
  1699. 387
  1700. 00:34:51,798 --> 00:34:53,174
  1701. And then, to my dad, who for years,
  1702.  
  1703. 388
  1704. 00:34:53,508 --> 00:34:56,344
  1705. he sat at that kitchen table, unreachable,
  1706.  
  1707. 389
  1708. 00:34:58,096 --> 00:34:59,555
  1709. in what I was too young
  1710.  
  1711. 390
  1712. 00:34:59,639 --> 00:35:02,809
  1713. and I was too stupid
  1714. to understand was his depression.
  1715.  
  1716. 391
  1717. 00:35:04,727 --> 00:35:06,896
  1718. Well, I kneel next to him in the aisle...
  1719.  
  1720. 392
  1721. 00:35:07,814 --> 00:35:09,398
  1722. and I brush his forearm...
  1723.  
  1724. 393
  1725. 00:35:11,317 --> 00:35:12,902
  1726. and I say, "Look, Dad,
  1727.  
  1728. 394
  1729. 00:35:13,820 --> 00:35:15,363
  1730. that guy on stage.
  1731.  
  1732. 395
  1733. 00:35:18,533 --> 00:35:20,076
  1734. That's how I see you."
  1735.  
  1736. 396
  1737. 00:36:28,644 --> 00:36:31,439
  1738. Now, my mom
  1739. was a different story altogether.
  1740.  
  1741. 397
  1742. 00:36:32,648 --> 00:36:35,776
  1743. I'm gonna release you
  1744. from suicide watch right now.
  1745.  
  1746. 398
  1747. 00:36:39,113 --> 00:36:40,990
  1748. Snap out of it! Come on.
  1749.  
  1750. 399
  1751. 00:36:42,617 --> 00:36:44,577
  1752. Because my mother was bright, happy.
  1753.  
  1754. 400
  1755. 00:36:44,660 --> 00:36:47,246
  1756. She'd merrily make conversation
  1757. with a broom handle.
  1758.  
  1759. 401
  1760. 00:36:47,622 --> 00:36:51,834
  1761. She believed that there was good faith,
  1762. good heart, good hope in all citizens.
  1763.  
  1764. 402
  1765. 00:36:52,126 --> 00:36:56,172
  1766. She gave the world a lot more credit,
  1767. perhaps, than it deserves,
  1768.  
  1769. 403
  1770. 00:36:56,255 --> 00:36:57,757
  1771. but that was her way.
  1772.  
  1773. 404
  1774. 00:36:57,840 --> 00:36:59,926
  1775. Now, on school mornings-- I hated school.
  1776.  
  1777. 405
  1778. 00:37:00,009 --> 00:37:01,886
  1779. That's just Rock Star 101.
  1780.  
  1781. 406
  1782. 00:37:05,556 --> 00:37:07,558
  1783. If you don't hate school in my business,
  1784.  
  1785. 407
  1786. 00:37:07,642 --> 00:37:10,019
  1787. please keep your fucking day job,
  1788. all right?
  1789.  
  1790. 408
  1791. 00:37:11,437 --> 00:37:14,732
  1792. Because it's a sign.
  1793. It's a sign that, brother,
  1794.  
  1795. 409
  1796. 00:37:14,815 --> 00:37:17,860
  1797. you're going nowhere, man. Nowhere.
  1798.  
  1799. 410
  1800. 00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:20,947
  1801. You need to have hatred in your heart
  1802.  
  1803. 411
  1804. 00:37:21,697 --> 00:37:24,116
  1805. to get to the top where I am, all right?
  1806.  
  1807. 412
  1808. 00:37:24,575 --> 00:37:27,411
  1809. You've got to hate, all right? Uh...
  1810.  
  1811. 413
  1812. 00:37:27,870 --> 00:37:29,497
  1813. So, of course I hated getting up.
  1814.  
  1815. 414
  1816. 00:37:29,580 --> 00:37:32,583
  1817. And, uh, my mom had perfected
  1818. this technique in the morning
  1819.  
  1820. 415
  1821. 00:37:32,667 --> 00:37:35,169
  1822. where she'd stand over my bed
  1823. with a glass of ice water
  1824.  
  1825. 416
  1826. 00:37:35,253 --> 00:37:36,337
  1827. and give me 30 seconds.
  1828.  
  1829. 417
  1830. 00:37:37,213 --> 00:37:39,840
  1831. You know, "Five, four, three, two..."
  1832.  
  1833. 418
  1834. 00:37:39,924 --> 00:37:42,260
  1835. Boom! Niagara Falls.
  1836.  
  1837. 419
  1838. 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:46,138
  1839. I would get dressed,
  1840. I would drift downstairs to breakfast,
  1841.  
  1842. 420
  1843. 00:37:46,222 --> 00:37:51,060
  1844. where I would feast daily
  1845. on a huge bowl of Sugar Pops.
  1846.  
  1847. 421
  1848. 00:37:52,270 --> 00:37:53,729
  1849. A fine product...
  1850.  
  1851. 422
  1852. 00:37:54,981 --> 00:37:57,316
  1853. ...with just one problem.
  1854.  
  1855. 423
  1856. 00:37:58,234 --> 00:38:00,695
  1857. They don't put enough sugar
  1858. in those Sugar Pops.
  1859.  
  1860. 424
  1861. 00:38:01,362 --> 00:38:04,907
  1862. So, I wasn't content
  1863. until I snowed more sugar
  1864.  
  1865. 425
  1866. 00:38:04,991 --> 00:38:08,619
  1867. on my Sugar Pops
  1868. until they looked like the Himalayas.
  1869.  
  1870. 426
  1871. 00:38:08,995 --> 00:38:12,873
  1872. - And then... Mmm!
  1873. - "Good!"
  1874.  
  1875. 427
  1876. 00:38:13,249 --> 00:38:16,919
  1877. With a buzz on and a kiss from my mom,
  1878.  
  1879. 428
  1880. 00:38:17,003 --> 00:38:18,296
  1881. I was off
  1882.  
  1883. 429
  1884. 00:38:19,005 --> 00:38:22,633
  1885. with my sister, lumbering up the street
  1886. with our book bags
  1887.  
  1888. 430
  1889. 00:38:23,175 --> 00:38:25,928
  1890. as my mom's high heels clicked lightly
  1891. in the other direction
  1892.  
  1893. 431
  1894. 00:38:26,012 --> 00:38:28,973
  1895. toward Lawyers Title Insurance Company
  1896. in town center.
  1897.  
  1898. 432
  1899. 00:38:29,056 --> 00:38:30,558
  1900. She was a legal secretary.
  1901.  
  1902. 433
  1903. 00:38:30,891 --> 00:38:33,477
  1904. That was the job she did
  1905. since the day she got out of high school,
  1906.  
  1907. 434
  1908. 00:38:33,561 --> 00:38:35,021
  1909. 50 years that followed.
  1910.  
  1911. 435
  1912. 00:38:35,104 --> 00:38:38,566
  1913. Goes to work, doesn't miss a day,
  1914. never sick,
  1915.  
  1916. 436
  1917. 00:38:38,649 --> 00:38:41,027
  1918. never down, never complains.
  1919.  
  1920. 437
  1921. 00:38:41,110 --> 00:38:43,279
  1922. Work doesn't appear to be a burden
  1923. for her,
  1924.  
  1925. 438
  1926. 00:38:43,362 --> 00:38:46,282
  1927. but it's a source of energy
  1928. and of social pleasure.
  1929.  
  1930. 439
  1931. 00:38:46,866 --> 00:38:49,910
  1932. Now, some evenings, I would meet my mother
  1933. at closing time,
  1934.  
  1935. 440
  1936. 00:38:49,994 --> 00:38:52,872
  1937. and we would be the last
  1938. to leave the office,
  1939.  
  1940. 441
  1941. 00:38:52,955 --> 00:38:55,541
  1942. and this was always a great privilege
  1943. to me.
  1944.  
  1945. 442
  1946. 00:38:56,167 --> 00:38:59,128
  1947. I would have my mother all to myself.
  1948.  
  1949. 443
  1950. 00:38:59,503 --> 00:39:02,006
  1951. And with the building empty,
  1952. her high heels would echo
  1953.  
  1954. 444
  1955. 00:39:02,089 --> 00:39:04,383
  1956. down the long linoleum hallway.
  1957.  
  1958. 445
  1959. 00:39:04,717 --> 00:39:08,554
  1960. And with the fluorescent lights out,
  1961. lawyers' cubicles empty,
  1962.  
  1963. 446
  1964. 00:39:08,637 --> 00:39:12,725
  1965. secretaries' desks empty,
  1966. typewriters covered,
  1967.  
  1968. 447
  1969. 00:39:13,100 --> 00:39:18,481
  1970. silent, the building was so still
  1971. after all the noise of the day.
  1972.  
  1973. 448
  1974. 00:39:18,564 --> 00:39:22,234
  1975. You know, it was so--
  1976. It got so quiet, it was as if...
  1977.  
  1978. 449
  1979. 00:39:23,194 --> 00:39:28,366
  1980. It-- It was as if the building itself
  1981. was resting
  1982.  
  1983. 450
  1984. 00:39:28,991 --> 00:39:32,578
  1985. after a long day of service
  1986. in the interests of our town.
  1987.  
  1988. 451
  1989. 00:39:33,788 --> 00:39:35,831
  1990. And then suddenly,
  1991. we'd be through the front door
  1992.  
  1993. 452
  1994. 00:39:35,915 --> 00:39:37,166
  1995. and out on Main Street
  1996.  
  1997. 453
  1998. 00:39:37,249 --> 00:39:40,586
  1999. in the five o'clock rush hour,
  2000. and she would stride along,
  2001.  
  2002. 454
  2003. 00:39:41,003 --> 00:39:45,549
  2004. statuesque, and I would be running
  2005. alongside her just...
  2006.  
  2007. 455
  2008. 00:39:46,550 --> 00:39:49,261
  2009. trying to keep up and I would be,
  2010. you know, looking up at her.
  2011.  
  2012. 456
  2013. 00:39:49,345 --> 00:39:52,681
  2014. And, uh, it's a sight
  2015. that I've never, never forgotten.
  2016.  
  2017. 457
  2018. 00:39:53,516 --> 00:39:55,851
  2019. My mother walking home from work.
  2020.  
  2021. 458
  2022. 00:39:56,644 --> 00:39:57,853
  2023. It had some...
  2024.  
  2025. 459
  2026. 00:40:02,233 --> 00:40:04,443
  2027. just some eternal impact on me.
  2028.  
  2029. 460
  2030. 00:40:05,403 --> 00:40:06,445
  2031. You know? Uh...
  2032.  
  2033. 461
  2034. 00:40:07,154 --> 00:40:10,574
  2035. She-- She always had
  2036. these very ethnic features.
  2037.  
  2038. 462
  2039. 00:40:10,658 --> 00:40:11,575
  2040. She had...
  2041.  
  2042. 463
  2043. 00:40:12,118 --> 00:40:15,121
  2044. coal-black hair, Italian olive skin,
  2045. and when she was young,
  2046.  
  2047. 464
  2048. 00:40:15,204 --> 00:40:18,082
  2049. she wore that red lipstick
  2050. that was very fashionable
  2051.  
  2052. 465
  2053. 00:40:18,582 --> 00:40:19,792
  2054. in the '50s.
  2055.  
  2056. 466
  2057. 00:40:20,334 --> 00:40:23,421
  2058. And she'd be looking down at me
  2059. with a look that, for me,
  2060.  
  2061. 467
  2062. 00:40:23,754 --> 00:40:26,966
  2063. was like the grace of Mary, you know?
  2064.  
  2065. 468
  2066. 00:40:27,049 --> 00:40:30,928
  2067. Made me understand,
  2068. for the first time, how good it feels
  2069.  
  2070. 469
  2071. 00:40:31,929 --> 00:40:34,390
  2072. to feel pride in somebody that you love,
  2073.  
  2074. 470
  2075. 00:40:35,516 --> 00:40:37,226
  2076. and who loves you back.
  2077.  
  2078. 471
  2079. 00:40:38,644 --> 00:40:41,647
  2080. You know, she let the town know
  2081. that we are handsome,
  2082.  
  2083. 472
  2084. 00:40:41,730 --> 00:40:45,109
  2085. responsible members
  2086. of this shit-dog burgh,
  2087.  
  2088. 473
  2089. 00:40:45,192 --> 00:40:47,194
  2090. pulling our own individual weight
  2091.  
  2092. 474
  2093. 00:40:47,278 --> 00:40:50,489
  2094. doing what has to be done
  2095. day after day.
  2096.  
  2097. 475
  2098. 00:40:50,573 --> 00:40:53,659
  2099. We have a place here that we have earned!
  2100.  
  2101. 476
  2102. 00:40:54,535 --> 00:40:58,956
  2103. And we have a reason to open our eyes
  2104. at the break of each day
  2105.  
  2106. 477
  2107. 00:40:59,039 --> 00:41:02,084
  2108. and breathe in a life
  2109. that's steady and good.
  2110.  
  2111. 478
  2112. 00:41:04,545 --> 00:41:08,549
  2113. Now, my mom was truthfulness,
  2114. consistency, good humor,
  2115.  
  2116. 479
  2117. 00:41:08,924 --> 00:41:13,512
  2118. professionalism, grace,
  2119. kindness, optimism, civility,
  2120.  
  2121. 480
  2122. 00:41:13,888 --> 00:41:16,307
  2123. fairness, pride in yourself,
  2124.  
  2125. 481
  2126. 00:41:16,390 --> 00:41:19,810
  2127. responsibility,
  2128. love, faith in your family,
  2129.  
  2130. 482
  2131. 00:41:20,311 --> 00:41:23,981
  2132. commitment, joy in your work,
  2133. and a never-say-die thirst
  2134.  
  2135. 483
  2136. 00:41:24,064 --> 00:41:27,109
  2137. for living, for living and for life.
  2138.  
  2139. 484
  2140. 00:41:27,860 --> 00:41:31,113
  2141. And most importantly, for dancing.
  2142.  
  2143. 485
  2144. 00:41:31,947 --> 00:41:36,744
  2145. My mother and her two sisters
  2146. were dancing machines, all right?
  2147.  
  2148. 486
  2149. 00:41:37,244 --> 00:41:40,456
  2150. They grew up in the '40s
  2151. with the big bands and the swing bands
  2152.  
  2153. 487
  2154. 00:41:40,539 --> 00:41:43,584
  2155. and they--
  2156. they learned to jitterbug and-- and...
  2157.  
  2158. 488
  2159. 00:41:47,046 --> 00:41:49,465
  2160. It was in their bones, you know?
  2161.  
  2162. 489
  2163. 00:41:49,882 --> 00:41:53,552
  2164. My mom is seven years into Alzheimer's.
  2165.  
  2166. 490
  2167. 00:41:55,221 --> 00:41:56,764
  2168. And she's 93.
  2169.  
  2170. 491
  2171. 00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:01,894
  2172. But dancing and the desire
  2173. and need to dance is something that...
  2174.  
  2175. 492
  2176. 00:42:02,144 --> 00:42:03,771
  2177. it hasn't left her.
  2178.  
  2179. 493
  2180. 00:42:04,855 --> 00:42:08,317
  2181. Remains an essential,
  2182. primal part of who she is.
  2183.  
  2184. 494
  2185. 00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,987
  2186. It's beyond language.
  2187. It's more powerful than memory.
  2188.  
  2189. 495
  2190. 00:42:12,655 --> 00:42:16,742
  2191. And when she comes in the door,
  2192. we make sure there's music on.
  2193.  
  2194. 496
  2195. 00:42:18,244 --> 00:42:20,621
  2196. She wants to dance, you know?
  2197.  
  2198. 497
  2199. 00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:24,500
  2200. Uh, these things were the embodiment
  2201. of my mother.
  2202.  
  2203. 498
  2204. 00:42:24,583 --> 00:42:25,793
  2205. They were her heart.
  2206.  
  2207. 499
  2208. 00:42:25,876 --> 00:42:30,673
  2209. She carried on and she carries on
  2210. as if they never,
  2211.  
  2212. 500
  2213. 00:42:32,091 --> 00:42:33,551
  2214. never deserted her.
  2215.  
  2216. 501
  2217. 00:47:03,278 --> 00:47:06,198
  2218. There's nothing like being young
  2219. and leaving someplace.
  2220.  
  2221. 502
  2222. 00:47:07,115 --> 00:47:09,785
  2223. That was a feeling that, oh,
  2224.  
  2225. 503
  2226. 00:47:10,536 --> 00:47:11,578
  2227. I loved.
  2228.  
  2229. 504
  2230. 00:47:12,079 --> 00:47:14,289
  2231. Maybe that's why I became a musician.
  2232.  
  2233. 505
  2234. 00:47:15,082 --> 00:47:16,250
  2235. Um...
  2236.  
  2237. 506
  2238. 00:47:17,167 --> 00:47:19,378
  2239. Sleep late, stay up late.
  2240.  
  2241. 507
  2242. 00:47:20,254 --> 00:47:22,089
  2243. And you do an awful lot of leaving.
  2244.  
  2245. 508
  2246. 00:47:23,423 --> 00:47:25,717
  2247. Night I left Freehold for the last time,
  2248.  
  2249. 509
  2250. 00:47:26,802 --> 00:47:29,346
  2251. I laid back on the couch,
  2252. it was perched high atop a load
  2253.  
  2254. 510
  2255. 00:47:29,429 --> 00:47:30,764
  2256. of the band's junk furniture
  2257.  
  2258. 511
  2259. 00:47:30,848 --> 00:47:34,560
  2260. in the back of an open flatbed truck
  2261. on a beautiful summer night.
  2262.  
  2263. 512
  2264. 00:47:35,018 --> 00:47:36,937
  2265. I was 19 years old.
  2266.  
  2267. 513
  2268. 00:47:37,229 --> 00:47:41,441
  2269. Ooh... that felt pretty good.
  2270.  
  2271. 514
  2272. 00:47:41,525 --> 00:47:44,903
  2273. Soft ocean breeze of the shore
  2274. was reaching all the way inland.
  2275.  
  2276. 515
  2277. 00:47:44,987 --> 00:47:46,738
  2278. And as we drew through town,
  2279.  
  2280. 516
  2281. 00:47:46,822 --> 00:47:48,490
  2282. for the very last time,
  2283.  
  2284. 517
  2285. 00:47:49,366 --> 00:47:51,285
  2286. we were stopped by the police...
  2287.  
  2288. 518
  2289. 00:47:53,245 --> 00:47:57,332
  2290. ...who informed us that there was a law
  2291. against moving after dark.
  2292.  
  2293. 519
  2294. 00:48:01,253 --> 00:48:05,340
  2295. What the fuck?
  2296.  
  2297. 520
  2298. 00:48:06,049 --> 00:48:08,343
  2299. Who the fuck would know that?
  2300.  
  2301. 521
  2302. 00:48:08,760 --> 00:48:10,888
  2303. Don't move your shit after dark?
  2304.  
  2305. 522
  2306. 00:48:11,722 --> 00:48:14,892
  2307. What are we running off with,
  2308. Freehold's great antiquities?
  2309.  
  2310. 523
  2311. 00:48:16,018 --> 00:48:17,603
  2312. The sun goes down,
  2313.  
  2314. 524
  2315. 00:48:19,062 --> 00:48:21,440
  2316. they'll bust your ass in Freehold, son.
  2317.  
  2318. 525
  2319. 00:48:22,733 --> 00:48:24,902
  2320. Anyway, they, uh...
  2321. They sent us on our way.
  2322.  
  2323. 526
  2324. 00:48:24,985 --> 00:48:27,070
  2325. Glad to be rid of the town hippies,
  2326. I guess.
  2327.  
  2328. 527
  2329. 00:48:27,154 --> 00:48:28,864
  2330. And so, I lay back on my couch
  2331.  
  2332. 528
  2333. 00:48:28,947 --> 00:48:30,866
  2334. and I was watching
  2335. the tree branches rush above me
  2336.  
  2337. 529
  2338. 00:48:30,949 --> 00:48:34,077
  2339. and the stars scrolling in the night sky,
  2340. and I remember
  2341.  
  2342. 530
  2343. 00:48:34,453 --> 00:48:36,246
  2344. I felt absolutely wonderful.
  2345.  
  2346. 531
  2347. 00:48:36,580 --> 00:48:38,665
  2348. I had nothing, no parents.
  2349.  
  2350. 532
  2351. 00:48:38,749 --> 00:48:41,960
  2352. They had moved away
  2353. with my little sister Pam
  2354.  
  2355. 533
  2356. 00:48:42,544 --> 00:48:45,047
  2357. to California in 1969.
  2358.  
  2359. 534
  2360. 00:48:45,756 --> 00:48:49,301
  2361. My sister Virginia,
  2362. great soul that she is,
  2363.  
  2364. 535
  2365. 00:48:49,384 --> 00:48:52,304
  2366. she got pregnant and had a baby at 18.
  2367.  
  2368. 536
  2369. 00:48:52,387 --> 00:48:55,891
  2370. She left high school,
  2371. married a competitive bull rider
  2372.  
  2373. 537
  2374. 00:48:56,850 --> 00:48:59,269
  2375. and they moved into the wilds
  2376. of southern New Jersey,
  2377.  
  2378. 538
  2379. 00:48:59,353 --> 00:49:01,563
  2380. because that's where the cowboys live.
  2381.  
  2382. 539
  2383. 00:49:01,647 --> 00:49:03,023
  2384. I ain't kidding.
  2385.  
  2386. 540
  2387. 00:49:03,106 --> 00:49:05,901
  2388. The real joke is, 50 years later,
  2389.  
  2390. 541
  2391. 00:49:05,984 --> 00:49:08,862
  2392. they're still together
  2393. and they still go to the rodeo.
  2394.  
  2395. 542
  2396. 00:49:12,282 --> 00:49:16,161
  2397. Well, I had no money and no family
  2398. and no realistic future.
  2399.  
  2400. 543
  2401. 00:49:16,244 --> 00:49:20,916
  2402. But yet, I remember laying on that couch
  2403. with the summer wind rushing over me
  2404.  
  2405. 544
  2406. 00:49:20,999 --> 00:49:26,463
  2407. and, you know,
  2408. that-- that saltwater smell in the air
  2409.  
  2410. 545
  2411. 00:49:26,546 --> 00:49:28,757
  2412. of the shore coming on, and thinking...
  2413.  
  2414. 546
  2415. 00:49:29,758 --> 00:49:31,218
  2416. I was just happy.
  2417.  
  2418. 547
  2419. 00:49:31,843 --> 00:49:33,011
  2420. I was happy.
  2421.  
  2422. 548
  2423. 00:49:33,512 --> 00:49:37,474
  2424. I got it all, you know?
  2425. Maybe I did, you know?
  2426.  
  2427. 549
  2428. 00:49:38,225 --> 00:49:41,853
  2429. Maybe there's nothing like that moment
  2430. in your life of being young and...
  2431.  
  2432. 550
  2433. 00:49:42,312 --> 00:49:45,023
  2434. leaving someplace,
  2435. all that youthful freedom.
  2436.  
  2437. 551
  2438. 00:49:45,565 --> 00:49:49,069
  2439. You feel-- Finally being untethered
  2440. from everything you've ever known:
  2441.  
  2442. 552
  2443. 00:49:49,152 --> 00:49:51,655
  2444. the life you've lived, your past,
  2445. your parents,
  2446.  
  2447. 553
  2448. 00:49:51,738 --> 00:49:54,992
  2449. the world you've gotten used to
  2450. and that you've loved and hated.
  2451.  
  2452. 554
  2453. 00:49:55,242 --> 00:49:58,120
  2454. Your life laying before you
  2455. like a blank page.
  2456.  
  2457. 555
  2458. 00:49:58,537 --> 00:50:00,664
  2459. It's the one thing I miss
  2460. about getting older,
  2461.  
  2462. 556
  2463. 00:50:00,747 --> 00:50:05,293
  2464. I miss the beauty of that blank page.
  2465.  
  2466. 557
  2467. 00:50:06,253 --> 00:50:08,171
  2468. So much life in front of you.
  2469.  
  2470. 558
  2471. 00:50:08,714 --> 00:50:12,342
  2472. Its promise, its possibilities,
  2473. its mysteries, its adventures.
  2474.  
  2475. 559
  2476. 00:50:13,093 --> 00:50:14,553
  2477. That blank page...
  2478.  
  2479. 560
  2480. 00:50:16,054 --> 00:50:17,389
  2481. just laying there.
  2482.  
  2483. 561
  2484. 00:50:20,100 --> 00:50:21,810
  2485. Daring you to write on it.
  2486.  
  2487. 562
  2488. 00:55:51,056 --> 00:55:53,975
  2489. So... So, I'm 20 years old
  2490.  
  2491. 563
  2492. 00:55:54,434 --> 00:55:56,186
  2493. and I'm living and playing
  2494. on the Jersey Shore
  2495.  
  2496. 564
  2497. 00:55:56,269 --> 00:55:58,021
  2498. and I'm waiting to be discovered.
  2499.  
  2500. 565
  2501. 00:55:58,938 --> 00:56:01,483
  2502. Now, I have some confidence.
  2503.  
  2504. 566
  2505. 00:56:02,192 --> 00:56:03,651
  2506. I've been around a bit.
  2507.  
  2508. 567
  2509. 00:56:04,611 --> 00:56:05,862
  2510. And without a doubt,
  2511.  
  2512. 568
  2513. 00:56:06,404 --> 00:56:08,740
  2514. I am definitely the best thing
  2515. that I've ever seen.
  2516.  
  2517. 569
  2518. 00:56:10,825 --> 00:56:14,079
  2519. I've already played in front
  2520. of every conceivable audience.
  2521.  
  2522. 570
  2523. 00:56:14,621 --> 00:56:16,664
  2524. I have played firemen's fairs,
  2525.  
  2526. 571
  2527. 00:56:16,915 --> 00:56:20,877
  2528. midnight madness, supermarket openings,
  2529. drive-in movies,
  2530.  
  2531. 572
  2532. 00:56:21,169 --> 00:56:24,339
  2533. uh, in front of the concession stand
  2534. in between films.
  2535.  
  2536. 573
  2537. 00:56:24,756 --> 00:56:27,008
  2538. I've played beach parties,
  2539. officers' clubs,
  2540.  
  2541. 574
  2542. 00:56:27,092 --> 00:56:28,676
  2543. pizza parlors, coffee shops,
  2544.  
  2545. 575
  2546. 00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:32,389
  2547. bowling alleys, trailer parks,
  2548. roller rinks, VFW halls,
  2549.  
  2550. 576
  2551. 00:56:32,514 --> 00:56:36,267
  2552. CYO canteens, the Elks Lodge,
  2553. YMCA gymnasiums,
  2554.  
  2555. 577
  2556. 00:56:36,351 --> 00:56:40,397
  2557. hockey rinks, county fairs, carnivals,
  2558. high school dances, weddings,
  2559.  
  2560. 578
  2561. 00:56:40,688 --> 00:56:43,483
  2562. fraternity parties,
  2563. bar mitzvahs...
  2564.  
  2565. 579
  2566. 00:56:43,566 --> 00:56:47,278
  2567. ...soul revues, battle of the bands,
  2568.  
  2569. 580
  2570. 00:56:47,362 --> 00:56:51,783
  2571. Sing Sing Prison,
  2572. and Marlboro Psychiatric Hospital.
  2573.  
  2574. 581
  2575. 00:56:58,873 --> 00:57:02,794
  2576. Send me your murderers and your maniacs
  2577. and let me entertain them, all right?
  2578.  
  2579. 582
  2580. 00:57:03,211 --> 00:57:05,964
  2581. That's what I do. That's all true.
  2582.  
  2583. 583
  2584. 00:57:06,047 --> 00:57:08,425
  2585. That's all before I was 23 years old.
  2586.  
  2587. 584
  2588. 00:57:08,508 --> 00:57:10,552
  2589. I'm frustrated. I listen to the radio
  2590.  
  2591. 585
  2592. 00:57:10,635 --> 00:57:13,096
  2593. and I think, "I'm as good as that guy.
  2594.  
  2595. 586
  2596. 00:57:13,179 --> 00:57:14,764
  2597. I'm better than that guy.
  2598.  
  2599. 587
  2600. 00:57:15,056 --> 00:57:16,474
  2601. So why not me?"
  2602.  
  2603. 588
  2604. 00:57:17,183 --> 00:57:23,148
  2605. Because I live
  2606. in the fucking boondocks, all right?
  2607.  
  2608. 589
  2609. 00:57:23,898 --> 00:57:26,943
  2610. Let me explain this to you.
  2611. I live in the boondocks.
  2612.  
  2613. 590
  2614. 00:57:27,026 --> 00:57:31,197
  2615. There's nobody here,
  2616. and no one comes down here.
  2617.  
  2618. 591
  2619. 00:57:32,365 --> 00:57:33,867
  2620. It's a grave.
  2621.  
  2622. 592
  2623. 00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:40,290
  2624. There was no Jersey, Jersey,
  2625. Jersey Shore, Jersey Almighty shit.
  2626.  
  2627. 593
  2628. 00:57:44,043 --> 00:57:45,920
  2629. I invented that.
  2630.  
  2631. 594
  2632. 00:57:55,054 --> 00:57:56,347
  2633. Before me...
  2634.  
  2635. 595
  2636. 00:57:57,599 --> 00:57:59,559
  2637. Jersey was Jeserkhistan.
  2638.  
  2639. 596
  2640. 00:58:00,894 --> 00:58:02,562
  2641. Jeserkhistan!
  2642.  
  2643. 597
  2644. 00:58:03,396 --> 00:58:07,650
  2645. One of the little -stan things
  2646. that nobody knows a fucking thing about.
  2647.  
  2648. 598
  2649. 00:58:07,901 --> 00:58:08,776
  2650. You know?
  2651.  
  2652. 599
  2653. 00:58:08,860 --> 00:58:13,156
  2654. And New York was a million miles away
  2655.  
  2656. 600
  2657. 00:58:13,239 --> 00:58:16,201
  2658. from the Jersey Shore.
  2659. In my little town as a child,
  2660.  
  2661. 601
  2662. 00:58:16,284 --> 00:58:20,288
  2663. we knew no one who had ever been
  2664. to New York City.
  2665.  
  2666. 602
  2667. 00:58:22,332 --> 00:58:25,627
  2668. Jesus Christ, it was--
  2669. it was only an hour away!
  2670.  
  2671. 603
  2672. 00:58:27,295 --> 00:58:31,090
  2673. But no, you might as well have said
  2674. you're going to the fucking Moon.
  2675.  
  2676. 604
  2677. 00:58:32,258 --> 00:58:35,470
  2678. "Hey, we're going to the Moon,
  2679. you wanna go?" "No, no, no.
  2680.  
  2681. 605
  2682. 00:58:35,845 --> 00:58:37,931
  2683. No, New York. No..."
  2684.  
  2685. 606
  2686. 00:58:38,014 --> 00:58:38,932
  2687. We were provincial.
  2688.  
  2689. 607
  2690. 00:58:39,015 --> 00:58:42,644
  2691. Everybody was afraid
  2692. of the big city.
  2693.  
  2694. 608
  2695. 00:58:43,102 --> 00:58:45,939
  2696. And there was no Internet,
  2697. there was no ET, or MTV,
  2698.  
  2699. 609
  2700. 00:58:46,022 --> 00:58:48,691
  2701. or cable TV, or satellite, or...
  2702.  
  2703. 610
  2704. 00:58:48,775 --> 00:58:52,987
  2705. This is before anyone and everyone's
  2706. ass crack from Anyplace, USA...
  2707.  
  2708. 611
  2709. 00:58:53,738 --> 00:58:55,573
  2710. could be seen all over the world,
  2711.  
  2712. 612
  2713. 00:58:55,657 --> 00:58:59,577
  2714. uh, should they choose,
  2715. in the push of a key, in the next instant.
  2716.  
  2717. 613
  2718. 00:58:59,953 --> 00:59:02,247
  2719. So who was gonna come
  2720. to the Jersey Shore
  2721.  
  2722. 614
  2723. 00:59:03,081 --> 00:59:06,042
  2724. to discover the next big thing in 1971?
  2725.  
  2726. 615
  2727. 00:59:10,046 --> 00:59:11,130
  2728. You're correct.
  2729.  
  2730. 616
  2731. 00:59:16,261 --> 00:59:17,428
  2732. No-fucking-body.
  2733.  
  2734. 617
  2735. 00:59:19,389 --> 00:59:21,599
  2736. All we heard down there
  2737. was the sound of...
  2738.  
  2739. 618
  2740. 00:59:23,017 --> 00:59:24,310
  2741. one hand clapping.
  2742.  
  2743. 619
  2744. 00:59:24,978 --> 00:59:26,521
  2745. Wasn't gonna happen.
  2746.  
  2747. 620
  2748. 00:59:26,604 --> 00:59:27,647
  2749. I had one shot.
  2750.  
  2751. 621
  2752. 00:59:27,730 --> 00:59:29,774
  2753. My girlfriend
  2754. at the time did me a great favor.
  2755.  
  2756. 622
  2757. 00:59:29,857 --> 00:59:32,860
  2758. Brought a guy who had
  2759. a successful recording band
  2760.  
  2761. 623
  2762. 00:59:33,403 --> 00:59:36,614
  2763. down to the Student Prince,
  2764. our club in Asbury Park,
  2765.  
  2766. 624
  2767. 00:59:36,906 --> 00:59:38,408
  2768. to discover us.
  2769.  
  2770. 625
  2771. 00:59:38,491 --> 00:59:42,245
  2772. We got up on a little stage
  2773. in a club that fit 150 people.
  2774.  
  2775. 626
  2776. 00:59:42,328 --> 00:59:43,746
  2777. It was about half full.
  2778.  
  2779. 627
  2780. 00:59:44,080 --> 00:59:45,623
  2781. And we played for this guy
  2782.  
  2783. 628
  2784. 00:59:45,707 --> 00:59:48,501
  2785. like we were at Madison Square Garden.
  2786.  
  2787. 629
  2788. 00:59:48,793 --> 00:59:51,588
  2789. Everything we had, all night long.
  2790.  
  2791. 630
  2792. 00:59:52,547 --> 00:59:56,843
  2793. We played five sets,
  2794. from 9:00 p.m. till 3:00 a.m.
  2795.  
  2796. 631
  2797. 00:59:58,052 --> 01:00:00,888
  2798. At the end of the night,
  2799. I was soaked to my bones.
  2800.  
  2801. 632
  2802. 01:00:00,972 --> 01:00:04,017
  2803. I got off the bandstand,
  2804. this guy walked up to me.
  2805.  
  2806. 633
  2807. 01:00:04,100 --> 01:00:06,477
  2808. He looked me in the eye,
  2809. shook my hand and said,
  2810.  
  2811. 634
  2812. 01:00:06,561 --> 01:00:09,772
  2813. "You guys are the best unsigned band
  2814. I've ever seen."
  2815.  
  2816. 635
  2817. 01:00:11,482 --> 01:00:13,735
  2818. Then he slept with my girlfriend
  2819. and left town.
  2820.  
  2821. 636
  2822. 01:00:21,826 --> 01:00:23,328
  2823. That's the end of that story.
  2824.  
  2825. 637
  2826. 01:00:26,748 --> 01:00:28,041
  2827. It's a sad ending.
  2828.  
  2829. 638
  2830. 01:00:28,124 --> 01:00:30,710
  2831. I mean, I don't--
  2832. But that was enough for me.
  2833.  
  2834. 639
  2835. 01:00:32,211 --> 01:00:34,297
  2836. I gathered together the men...
  2837.  
  2838. 640
  2839. 01:00:35,340 --> 01:00:39,010
  2840. and I said, "Gentlemen,
  2841. we are going to have to leave
  2842.  
  2843. 641
  2844. 01:00:39,260 --> 01:00:43,139
  2845. the confines of the Jersey Shore
  2846.  
  2847. 642
  2848. 01:00:43,806 --> 01:00:46,434
  2849. and venture into parts unknown...
  2850.  
  2851. 643
  2852. 01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:49,354
  2853. if we want to be seen,
  2854.  
  2855. 644
  2856. 01:00:50,063 --> 01:00:53,524
  2857. heard by anybody or discovered."
  2858.  
  2859. 645
  2860. 01:00:54,108 --> 01:00:57,654
  2861. I found a manager, surfboard manufacturer
  2862. from the West Coast--
  2863.  
  2864. 646
  2865. 01:00:57,737 --> 01:01:01,074
  2866. he'd moved East-- by the name
  2867. of Carl Virgil "Tinker" West.
  2868.  
  2869. 647
  2870. 01:01:01,532 --> 01:01:05,912
  2871. Now, together, he,
  2872. Mad Dog Lopez, and myself
  2873.  
  2874. 648
  2875. 01:01:05,995 --> 01:01:08,247
  2876. we lived in the surfboard factory.
  2877.  
  2878. 649
  2879. 01:01:08,831 --> 01:01:13,086
  2880. In the industrial wastelands
  2881. of Wanamassa, New Jersey.
  2882.  
  2883. 650
  2884. 01:01:13,795 --> 01:01:17,465
  2885. Tinker said he had some remaining
  2886. rock 'n' roll contacts in San Francisco.
  2887.  
  2888. 651
  2889. 01:01:17,548 --> 01:01:21,135
  2890. So we all got excited,
  2891. and he said if we could get there,
  2892.  
  2893. 652
  2894. 01:01:21,594 --> 01:01:23,054
  2895. something might happen.
  2896.  
  2897. 653
  2898. 01:01:23,137 --> 01:01:27,433
  2899. So we saved up all our money
  2900. until we had $100.
  2901.  
  2902. 654
  2903. 01:01:27,517 --> 01:01:28,685
  2904. All right?
  2905.  
  2906. 655
  2907. 01:01:28,768 --> 01:01:31,562
  2908. And then me, Danny Federici,
  2909. Mad Dog Lopez,
  2910.  
  2911. 656
  2912. 01:01:31,646 --> 01:01:33,815
  2913. Little Vinnie Roslin, our bass player,
  2914.  
  2915. 657
  2916. 01:01:33,898 --> 01:01:36,275
  2917. rigged out Danny's station wagon
  2918. for the drive.
  2919.  
  2920. 658
  2921. 01:01:36,359 --> 01:01:39,445
  2922. Put a mattress in the back
  2923. for the drivers to spell each other
  2924.  
  2925. 659
  2926. 01:01:39,529 --> 01:01:41,239
  2927. and to sleep in on the way out there.
  2928.  
  2929. 660
  2930. 01:01:41,322 --> 01:01:44,826
  2931. We rigged Tinker's old '40s flatbed
  2932. to carry our equipment
  2933.  
  2934. 661
  2935. 01:01:44,909 --> 01:01:48,246
  2936. and we had three days
  2937. to make it across the country
  2938.  
  2939. 662
  2940. 01:01:48,329 --> 01:01:52,375
  2941. for a New Year's Eve gig
  2942. in Big Sur, California.
  2943.  
  2944. 663
  2945. 01:01:52,458 --> 01:01:54,419
  2946. Now, three days means
  2947.  
  2948. 664
  2949. 01:01:54,794 --> 01:01:57,797
  2950. those are gonna be thousand-mile days.
  2951.  
  2952. 665
  2953. 01:01:58,423 --> 01:02:01,634
  2954. You can make it, but you can't stop.
  2955.  
  2956. 666
  2957. 01:02:02,593 --> 01:02:05,596
  2958. You stop for gas and for nothing else.
  2959.  
  2960. 667
  2961. 01:02:05,972 --> 01:02:11,185
  2962. You drive, drive, drive, drive,
  2963. 72 hours straight.
  2964.  
  2965. 668
  2966. 01:02:11,269 --> 01:02:14,522
  2967. Somebody's driving all the time
  2968. around the clock.
  2969.  
  2970. 669
  2971. 01:02:15,064 --> 01:02:16,858
  2972. Now, of course, we lost Danny
  2973.  
  2974. 670
  2975. 01:02:16,941 --> 01:02:20,027
  2976. and the entire station wagon
  2977. full of drivers
  2978.  
  2979. 671
  2980. 01:02:20,486 --> 01:02:23,448
  2981. in Nashville, Tennessee.
  2982.  
  2983. 672
  2984. 01:02:23,531 --> 01:02:25,658
  2985. Now, there's no cellular phones.
  2986.  
  2987. 673
  2988. 01:02:27,326 --> 01:02:28,786
  2989. Young people, take a moment.
  2990.  
  2991. 674
  2992. 01:02:38,713 --> 01:02:39,964
  2993. Let's try it.
  2994.  
  2995. 675
  2996. 01:02:41,257 --> 01:02:43,634
  2997. Imagine a world
  2998. without the cellular phone.
  2999.  
  3000. 676
  3001. 01:02:44,802 --> 01:02:46,512
  3002. When you lose someone
  3003.  
  3004. 677
  3005. 01:02:46,888 --> 01:02:49,265
  3006. in that world
  3007. without the cellular phone...
  3008.  
  3009. 678
  3010. 01:02:51,017 --> 01:02:52,643
  3011. oh, they're fucking lost.
  3012.  
  3013. 679
  3014. 01:02:57,774 --> 01:02:59,484
  3015. There's no device.
  3016.  
  3017. 680
  3018. 01:02:59,734 --> 01:03:02,779
  3019. You can't get in touch with them.
  3020. They're gone!
  3021.  
  3022. 681
  3023. 01:03:03,196 --> 01:03:04,405
  3024. Out of your life!
  3025.  
  3026. 682
  3027. 01:03:07,533 --> 01:03:08,534
  3028. Into the ether.
  3029.  
  3030. 683
  3031. 01:03:10,620 --> 01:03:13,873
  3032. So now, it's just Tinker and me,
  3033. Tinker's dog,
  3034.  
  3035. 684
  3036. 01:03:14,290 --> 01:03:15,917
  3037. thousands of miles to go,
  3038.  
  3039. 685
  3040. 01:03:16,000 --> 01:03:19,754
  3041. and we got several problems.
  3042. One is I have no license.
  3043.  
  3044. 686
  3045. 01:03:20,129 --> 01:03:23,758
  3046. Second problem is I don't have a clue
  3047. as to how to drive.
  3048.  
  3049. 687
  3050. 01:03:24,550 --> 01:03:26,761
  3051. And by that, I mean the man
  3052.  
  3053. 688
  3054. 01:03:27,178 --> 01:03:30,473
  3055. who would very, very shortly
  3056. write "Racing in the Street"...
  3057.  
  3058. 689
  3059. 01:03:40,191 --> 01:03:41,692
  3060. That's how good I am.
  3061.  
  3062. 690
  3063. 01:03:43,903 --> 01:03:48,241
  3064. Because, at 21,
  3065. I had never driven a fucking block.
  3066.  
  3067. 691
  3068. 01:03:49,951 --> 01:03:51,327
  3069. Around 1:00 or 2:00 a.m.,
  3070.  
  3071. 692
  3072. 01:03:51,410 --> 01:03:54,539
  3073. Tinker's eyes glass over
  3074. and he says, "I'm fried.
  3075.  
  3076. 693
  3077. 01:03:54,622 --> 01:03:57,166
  3078. I need to get some sleep.
  3079. It's your turn to drive."
  3080.  
  3081. 694
  3082. 01:03:57,250 --> 01:03:59,377
  3083. I go, "Tink, I can't drive."
  3084.  
  3085. 695
  3086. 01:03:59,794 --> 01:04:02,171
  3087. He says, "Springsteen,
  3088. there's nothing to it.
  3089.  
  3090. 696
  3091. 01:04:02,547 --> 01:04:05,466
  3092. Idiots all over the world are doing it,
  3093. all right?"
  3094.  
  3095. 697
  3096. 01:04:06,509 --> 01:04:09,262
  3097. He pulls me into a parking lot.
  3098. He puts me behind the wheel.
  3099.  
  3100. 698
  3101. 01:04:09,345 --> 01:04:11,389
  3102. I start grinding gears,
  3103. pumping the clutch,
  3104.  
  3105. 699
  3106. 01:04:11,472 --> 01:04:15,685
  3107. jerking the truck all over the lot--
  3108. It's a 1940s manual transmission.
  3109.  
  3110. 700
  3111. 01:04:15,768 --> 01:04:18,271
  3112. I can't get past first gear!
  3113.  
  3114. 701
  3115. 01:04:19,856 --> 01:04:22,650
  3116. After a moment Tinker says,
  3117. "This isn't going to work,
  3118.  
  3119. 702
  3120. 01:04:22,733 --> 01:04:24,360
  3121. but I got another idea."
  3122.  
  3123. 703
  3124. 01:04:24,443 --> 01:04:26,070
  3125. He gets in the driver's seat.
  3126.  
  3127. 704
  3128. 01:04:26,153 --> 01:04:29,115
  3129. He slips in the clutch.
  3130. He smoothly shifts it into first.
  3131.  
  3132. 705
  3133. 01:04:29,198 --> 01:04:30,825
  3134. He eases out on the clutch.
  3135.  
  3136. 706
  3137. 01:04:30,908 --> 01:04:33,411
  3138. He gets that truck going
  3139. on a sweet little roll,
  3140.  
  3141. 707
  3142. 01:04:33,661 --> 01:04:36,163
  3143. looks at me and says,
  3144. "Now let's switch seats."
  3145.  
  3146. 708
  3147. 01:04:37,748 --> 01:04:39,375
  3148. And that's what we did.
  3149.  
  3150. 709
  3151. 01:04:40,418 --> 01:04:44,088
  3152. I was fine in second, third, and fourth
  3153. and I could keep it in between the lines
  3154.  
  3155. 710
  3156. 01:04:44,171 --> 01:04:48,092
  3157. as long as I didn't have to stop
  3158. or go near first gear.
  3159.  
  3160. 711
  3161. 01:04:48,926 --> 01:04:52,388
  3162. If I've gotta do either of those things,
  3163. I have to wake up Mr. West.
  3164.  
  3165. 712
  3166. 01:04:52,763 --> 01:04:55,933
  3167. All right? Now, it doesn't matter
  3168.  
  3169. 713
  3170. 01:04:56,392 --> 01:04:58,185
  3171. because he's awake anyway,
  3172.  
  3173. 714
  3174. 01:04:58,269 --> 01:05:00,897
  3175. because the guy who can't drive
  3176. is driving!
  3177.  
  3178. 715
  3179. 01:05:03,983 --> 01:05:06,027
  3180. You're not gonna sleep through that!
  3181.  
  3182. 716
  3183. 01:05:07,445 --> 01:05:08,863
  3184. So...
  3185.  
  3186. 717
  3187. 01:05:08,946 --> 01:05:12,074
  3188. You'd be surprised how far
  3189. you can go across this big country
  3190.  
  3191. 718
  3192. 01:05:12,158 --> 01:05:14,285
  3193. without having to stop. You know, it's...
  3194.  
  3195. 719
  3196. 01:05:14,952 --> 01:05:18,623
  3197. it's a long ways between things out there,
  3198.  
  3199. 720
  3200. 01:05:18,998 --> 01:05:20,917
  3201. and, man, I drove my share
  3202.  
  3203. 721
  3204. 01:05:21,417 --> 01:05:23,085
  3205. of 2,000 miles...
  3206.  
  3207. 722
  3208. 01:05:24,253 --> 01:05:26,380
  3209. in second, third, and fourth gear.
  3210.  
  3211. 723
  3212. 01:05:30,092 --> 01:05:31,928
  3213. Without killing anybody.
  3214.  
  3215. 724
  3216. 01:05:34,847 --> 01:05:38,684
  3217. Uh... And we made it on time,
  3218. you know, but, uh...
  3219.  
  3220. 725
  3221. 01:05:39,226 --> 01:05:40,061
  3222. that trip was...
  3223.  
  3224. 726
  3225. 01:05:42,396 --> 01:05:44,899
  3226. ...was where I saw the United States
  3227. at its fullest
  3228.  
  3229. 727
  3230. 01:05:44,982 --> 01:05:49,111
  3231. and as a young man, I was overwhelmed
  3232. by its size and its beauty, and...
  3233.  
  3234. 728
  3235. 01:05:49,195 --> 01:05:51,530
  3236. this is a short piece
  3237. from the book about...
  3238.  
  3239. 729
  3240. 01:05:52,823 --> 01:05:55,409
  3241. riding across the country
  3242. for the very first time.
  3243.  
  3244. 730
  3245. 01:05:59,997 --> 01:06:01,582
  3246. The country was beautiful.
  3247.  
  3248. 731
  3249. 01:06:01,791 --> 01:06:06,921
  3250. And I felt a great elation at the wheel
  3251. as we crossed the western desert at dawn.
  3252.  
  3253. 732
  3254. 01:06:07,755 --> 01:06:11,175
  3255. The deep blue, purple shadowed canyons.
  3256.  
  3257. 733
  3258. 01:06:11,968 --> 01:06:13,970
  3259. The pale yellow morning sky
  3260.  
  3261. 734
  3262. 01:06:14,845 --> 01:06:16,847
  3263. with all of its color drawn out,
  3264.  
  3265. 735
  3266. 01:06:17,848 --> 01:06:20,184
  3267. leaving just
  3268. the black silhouetted mountains
  3269.  
  3270. 736
  3271. 01:06:21,978 --> 01:06:23,521
  3272. in your rearview mirror.
  3273.  
  3274. 737
  3275. 01:06:24,939 --> 01:06:27,400
  3276. Then with the eastern sun rising
  3277. at our backs,
  3278.  
  3279. 738
  3280. 01:06:27,483 --> 01:06:30,987
  3281. the deep reds and the browns
  3282. of the plains and the hills
  3283.  
  3284. 739
  3285. 01:06:31,737 --> 01:06:34,532
  3286. came to life slowly in front of us.
  3287.  
  3288. 740
  3289. 01:06:38,452 --> 01:06:42,957
  3290. Your palms turn salty white
  3291. on the wheel from the aridity.
  3292.  
  3293. 741
  3294. 01:06:43,249 --> 01:06:46,502
  3295. Morning woke the Earth
  3296. into this muted color.
  3297.  
  3298. 742
  3299. 01:06:46,585 --> 01:06:49,255
  3300. And then came the flat light
  3301. of the midday sun
  3302.  
  3303. 743
  3304. 01:06:49,588 --> 01:06:52,800
  3305. and everything stood revealed
  3306. as pure horizon.
  3307.  
  3308. 744
  3309. 01:06:53,968 --> 01:06:57,388
  3310. Just sky, sky, sky, and more sky.
  3311.  
  3312. 745
  3313. 01:06:57,972 --> 01:07:00,391
  3314. Lowering onto two lanes of blacktop
  3315.  
  3316. 746
  3317. 01:07:01,684 --> 01:07:04,562
  3318. and disappearing into nothing.
  3319.  
  3320. 747
  3321. 01:07:06,105 --> 01:07:07,648
  3322. My favorite thing.
  3323.  
  3324. 748
  3325. 01:07:09,400 --> 01:07:12,653
  3326. Then the evening
  3327. with the sun burning red into your eyes
  3328.  
  3329. 749
  3330. 01:07:12,737 --> 01:07:15,906
  3331. and dropping gold
  3332. into the western hills in front of you.
  3333.  
  3334. 750
  3335. 01:07:16,615 --> 01:07:18,576
  3336. All felt like home to me.
  3337.  
  3338. 751
  3339. 01:07:19,952 --> 01:07:23,205
  3340. And I fell into a lasting love affair
  3341. with the desert.
  3342.  
  3343. 752
  3344. 01:11:25,447 --> 01:11:27,408
  3345. So, it's-- it's 1980.
  3346.  
  3347. 753
  3348. 01:11:27,533 --> 01:11:30,953
  3349. I'm 30 years old, I'm on another
  3350. cross-country trip with a buddy of mine
  3351.  
  3352. 754
  3353. 01:11:31,036 --> 01:11:33,497
  3354. and we stop outside of Phoenix to gas up.
  3355.  
  3356. 755
  3357. 01:11:33,580 --> 01:11:35,874
  3358. Go into a small-town drugstore,
  3359.  
  3360. 756
  3361. 01:11:35,958 --> 01:11:38,210
  3362. I'm rifling through a rack
  3363. of paperback books,
  3364.  
  3365. 757
  3366. 01:11:38,294 --> 01:11:41,130
  3367. I come across a book
  3368. called Born on the Fourth of July
  3369.  
  3370. 758
  3371. 01:11:41,338 --> 01:11:44,174
  3372. by a Vietnam veteran named Ron Kovic.
  3373.  
  3374. 759
  3375. 01:11:44,258 --> 01:11:46,719
  3376. Now, his book was a testimony
  3377. of the experience
  3378.  
  3379. 760
  3380. 01:11:46,802 --> 01:11:50,055
  3381. that he'd had as a combat infantryman
  3382. in Southeast Asia.
  3383.  
  3384. 761
  3385. 01:11:50,556 --> 01:11:51,932
  3386. A week or two later,
  3387.  
  3388. 762
  3389. 01:11:52,725 --> 01:11:56,854
  3390. I'm bunked in at the fabulous
  3391. Sunset Marquis motel in Los Angeles.
  3392.  
  3393. 763
  3394. 01:11:57,354 --> 01:12:00,774
  3395. Uh-- For the uninformed,
  3396. it's kind of an upscale,
  3397.  
  3398. 764
  3399. 01:12:00,858 --> 01:12:03,694
  3400. lowlife rock star hangout, all right?
  3401.  
  3402. 765
  3403. 01:12:03,777 --> 01:12:05,529
  3404. Uh, small world theory.
  3405.  
  3406. 766
  3407. 01:12:06,030 --> 01:12:08,324
  3408. Small world theory proves itself
  3409. once again.
  3410.  
  3411. 767
  3412. 01:12:08,407 --> 01:12:10,409
  3413. I'd been seeing a young guy
  3414. with shoulder-length hair
  3415.  
  3416. 768
  3417. 01:12:10,492 --> 01:12:13,287
  3418. sitting in a wheelchair
  3419. by the pool for several days.
  3420.  
  3421. 769
  3422. 01:12:13,662 --> 01:12:18,834
  3423. So, one afternoon he rolled up to me
  3424. and said, "Hi, I'm Ron Kovic.
  3425.  
  3426. 770
  3427. 01:12:18,917 --> 01:12:21,462
  3428. I wrote a book
  3429. called Born on the Fourth of July."
  3430.  
  3431. 771
  3432. 01:12:21,920 --> 01:12:26,091
  3433. I said, "Jeez. I just-- I just read it.
  3434. And it-- it destroyed me."
  3435.  
  3436. 772
  3437. 01:12:26,633 --> 01:12:30,846
  3438. He spent the afternoon talking to me
  3439. about many returned soldiers
  3440.  
  3441. 773
  3442. 01:12:30,929 --> 01:12:33,265
  3443. who were struggling
  3444. with a wide variety of problems,
  3445.  
  3446. 774
  3447. 01:12:33,349 --> 01:12:38,145
  3448. and he wanted to know if I'd take a drive
  3449. with him to the vet center in Venice...
  3450.  
  3451. 775
  3452. 01:12:38,896 --> 01:12:41,607
  3453. meet some
  3454. of the Southern California veterans.
  3455.  
  3456. 776
  3457. 01:12:42,066 --> 01:12:44,777
  3458. So I said, "Sure."
  3459. The next day, we headed out there,
  3460.  
  3461. 777
  3462. 01:12:44,860 --> 01:12:48,572
  3463. and I'm usually pretty easy with people,
  3464. but once we were at the center,
  3465.  
  3466. 778
  3467. 01:12:49,490 --> 01:12:53,369
  3468. I didn't know how to respond
  3469. to what I was seeing. Uh...
  3470.  
  3471. 779
  3472. 01:12:54,203 --> 01:12:58,040
  3473. Talking about my own life
  3474. to these guys seemed frivolous.
  3475.  
  3476. 780
  3477. 01:12:58,123 --> 01:12:58,957
  3478. You know?
  3479.  
  3480. 781
  3481. 01:12:59,041 --> 01:13:02,669
  3482. There was homelessness and drug problems
  3483. and post-traumatic stress and...
  3484.  
  3485. 782
  3486. 01:13:03,253 --> 01:13:06,173
  3487. young guys my age
  3488. dealing with life-changing...
  3489.  
  3490. 783
  3491. 01:13:07,299 --> 01:13:08,675
  3492. physical injuries.
  3493.  
  3494. 784
  3495. 01:13:08,759 --> 01:13:11,929
  3496. And it made me think about my own friends
  3497. from back home.
  3498.  
  3499. 785
  3500. 01:13:12,513 --> 01:13:13,847
  3501. Walter Cichon.
  3502.  
  3503. 786
  3504. 01:13:14,473 --> 01:13:18,477
  3505. Walter Cichon was the greatest
  3506. rock 'n' roll front man
  3507.  
  3508. 787
  3509. 01:13:18,560 --> 01:13:21,897
  3510. on the Jersey Shore
  3511. in the bar band '60s.
  3512.  
  3513. 788
  3514. 01:13:22,314 --> 01:13:24,358
  3515. He was in a group called The Motifs,
  3516.  
  3517. 789
  3518. 01:13:24,441 --> 01:13:28,946
  3519. and he was the first real rock star
  3520. that I ever laid my eyes on.
  3521.  
  3522. 790
  3523. 01:13:29,530 --> 01:13:32,741
  3524. He just had it in his bones.
  3525. He had it in his blood.
  3526.  
  3527. 791
  3528. 01:13:32,825 --> 01:13:35,327
  3529. It was in the way that he carried himself.
  3530.  
  3531. 792
  3532. 01:13:35,411 --> 01:13:39,665
  3533. On stage, he just was deadly.
  3534.  
  3535. 793
  3536. 01:13:39,748 --> 01:13:44,128
  3537. He was raw and sexual and dangerous,
  3538.  
  3539. 794
  3540. 01:13:44,211 --> 01:13:48,841
  3541. and in our little area he taught us,
  3542. by the way that he lived,
  3543.  
  3544. 795
  3545. 01:13:49,425 --> 01:13:52,344
  3546. that you could live your life
  3547. the way you chose.
  3548.  
  3549. 796
  3550. 01:13:52,428 --> 01:13:54,304
  3551. You could look the way you wanted to look,
  3552.  
  3553. 797
  3554. 01:13:54,388 --> 01:13:56,432
  3555. you could play the music
  3556. you wanted to play,
  3557.  
  3558. 798
  3559. 01:13:56,515 --> 01:13:58,475
  3560. you could be who you wanted to be,
  3561.  
  3562. 799
  3563. 01:13:58,559 --> 01:14:00,769
  3564. and you could tell anyone
  3565. who didn't like it
  3566.  
  3567. 800
  3568. 01:14:00,853 --> 01:14:02,604
  3569. to go fuck themselves.
  3570.  
  3571. 801
  3572. 01:14:02,688 --> 01:14:04,523
  3573. Walter had a...
  3574.  
  3575. 802
  3576. 01:14:05,607 --> 01:14:07,818
  3577. guitar-playing brother, Raymond.
  3578.  
  3579. 803
  3580. 01:14:08,861 --> 01:14:10,112
  3581. Raymond was...
  3582.  
  3583. 804
  3584. 01:14:10,487 --> 01:14:12,906
  3585. tall, tall, kind of sweetly clumsy guy,
  3586.  
  3587. 805
  3588. 01:14:12,990 --> 01:14:16,827
  3589. one of those big guys
  3590. who just isn't comfortable with his size.
  3591.  
  3592. 806
  3593. 01:14:17,369 --> 01:14:21,039
  3594. You know, uh, he's always, like,
  3595. "Ooh. Ooh."
  3596.  
  3597. 807
  3598. 01:14:21,123 --> 01:14:25,294
  3599. Knocking into shit wherever he is.
  3600. And wherever that is,
  3601.  
  3602. 808
  3603. 01:14:25,627 --> 01:14:29,548
  3604. there is just not enough space
  3605. for Raymond, for some reason.
  3606.  
  3607. 809
  3608. 01:14:30,048 --> 01:14:31,133
  3609. And, uh...
  3610.  
  3611. 810
  3612. 01:14:31,717 --> 01:14:35,095
  3613. But the strange thing was
  3614. he was always dressed impeccably
  3615.  
  3616. 811
  3617. 01:14:35,179 --> 01:14:40,184
  3618. with a pastel shirt, long pointed collar,
  3619. sharkskin pants, nylon socks,
  3620.  
  3621. 812
  3622. 01:14:40,559 --> 01:14:44,104
  3623. spit-shined pointy-toed shoes,
  3624. slicked-back black hair
  3625.  
  3626. 813
  3627. 01:14:44,188 --> 01:14:47,858
  3628. with a little curl that would come down
  3629. when he was playing the guitar.
  3630.  
  3631. 814
  3632. 01:14:47,941 --> 01:14:50,360
  3633. Uh, Raymond was my guitar hero.
  3634.  
  3635. 815
  3636. 01:14:50,652 --> 01:14:53,071
  3637. He was just a shoe salesman in the day.
  3638.  
  3639. 816
  3640. 01:14:53,780 --> 01:14:56,992
  3641. And, uh, Walter, I think,
  3642. worked construction.
  3643.  
  3644. 817
  3645. 01:14:57,075 --> 01:14:58,952
  3646. They were only a little bit older
  3647. than we were,
  3648.  
  3649. 818
  3650. 01:14:59,036 --> 01:15:02,539
  3651. never had any national hit records,
  3652. never did any big tours,
  3653.  
  3654. 819
  3655. 01:15:02,831 --> 01:15:04,500
  3656. but they were gods to me.
  3657.  
  3658. 820
  3659. 01:15:05,584 --> 01:15:06,585
  3660. And...
  3661.  
  3662. 821
  3663. 01:15:07,252 --> 01:15:09,755
  3664. the hours I spent standing
  3665. in front of their band,
  3666.  
  3667. 822
  3668. 01:15:09,838 --> 01:15:13,342
  3669. studying, studying, studying,
  3670. class in session.
  3671.  
  3672. 823
  3673. 01:15:14,176 --> 01:15:16,345
  3674. Night after night,
  3675. watching Ray's fingers fly
  3676.  
  3677. 824
  3678. 01:15:16,553 --> 01:15:18,931
  3679. over the fretboard,
  3680. and Walter would scare...
  3681.  
  3682. 825
  3683. 01:15:21,225 --> 01:15:23,143
  3684. the shit out of half the crowd.
  3685.  
  3686. 826
  3687. 01:15:23,894 --> 01:15:25,103
  3688. Oh, man.
  3689.  
  3690. 827
  3691. 01:15:26,355 --> 01:15:29,858
  3692. They were essential to my development
  3693. as a young musician.
  3694.  
  3695. 828
  3696. 01:15:30,317 --> 01:15:35,322
  3697. I learned so much
  3698. from Walter and from Ray.
  3699.  
  3700. 829
  3701. 01:15:35,739 --> 01:15:37,032
  3702. And my dream,
  3703.  
  3704. 830
  3705. 01:15:37,533 --> 01:15:40,494
  3706. my dream was I just wanted
  3707. to play like Ray
  3708.  
  3709. 831
  3710. 01:15:40,577 --> 01:15:41,787
  3711. and walk like Walter.
  3712.  
  3713. 832
  3714. 01:15:42,162 --> 01:15:43,413
  3715. And then there was Bart Haynes.
  3716.  
  3717. 833
  3718. 01:15:43,497 --> 01:15:47,834
  3719. Bart Haynes was the drummer
  3720. from my first band, The Castiles.
  3721.  
  3722. 834
  3723. 01:15:48,293 --> 01:15:51,588
  3724. He was the first real drummer
  3725. I ever played with.
  3726.  
  3727. 835
  3728. 01:15:51,672 --> 01:15:53,549
  3729. He was an absurdly funny kid,
  3730.  
  3731. 836
  3732. 01:15:53,632 --> 01:15:57,761
  3733. classic class clown,
  3734. was a good, good drummer...
  3735.  
  3736. 837
  3737. 01:15:58,178 --> 01:16:02,641
  3738. with one strange quirk--
  3739. couldn't play "Wipe Out" by The Surfaris.
  3740.  
  3741. 838
  3742. 01:16:04,726 --> 01:16:08,605
  3743. This may not seem so critical to you
  3744. right now, I understand.
  3745.  
  3746. 839
  3747. 01:16:09,690 --> 01:16:12,234
  3748. But in those days,
  3749.  
  3750. 840
  3751. 01:16:12,818 --> 01:16:15,696
  3752. your skills, your mettle,
  3753.  
  3754. 841
  3755. 01:16:16,029 --> 01:16:21,410
  3756. your self-worth as a drummer
  3757. and as a human being
  3758.  
  3759. 842
  3760. 01:16:23,120 --> 01:16:27,583
  3761. was tested in front of your peers
  3762. once an evening
  3763.  
  3764. 843
  3765. 01:16:27,666 --> 01:16:30,168
  3766. by your performance of "Wipe Out."
  3767.  
  3768. 844
  3769. 01:16:30,752 --> 01:16:34,214
  3770. Now, Bart could play
  3771. every other fucking thing,
  3772.  
  3773. 845
  3774. 01:16:34,298 --> 01:16:36,300
  3775. but when it came to "Wipe Out"...
  3776.  
  3777. 846
  3778. 01:16:40,679 --> 01:16:42,973
  3779. beyond his capabilities!
  3780.  
  3781. 847
  3782. 01:16:44,474 --> 01:16:45,809
  3783. It was tragic.
  3784.  
  3785. 848
  3786. 01:16:47,561 --> 01:16:49,354
  3787. You know, uh...
  3788.  
  3789. 849
  3790. 01:16:50,355 --> 01:16:52,441
  3791. One day he got off...
  3792.  
  3793. 850
  3794. 01:16:52,983 --> 01:16:56,278
  3795. got up off the drum stool,
  3796. he joined the Marines, and...
  3797.  
  3798. 851
  3799. 01:16:57,487 --> 01:16:59,990
  3800. Walter and Bart...
  3801.  
  3802. 852
  3803. 01:17:00,073 --> 01:17:05,829
  3804. ...they were both killed in the war
  3805. in 1967 and '68.
  3806.  
  3807. 853
  3808. 01:17:06,580 --> 01:17:09,625
  3809. Bart was the first young man
  3810. from our hometown
  3811.  
  3812. 854
  3813. 01:17:10,334 --> 01:17:12,377
  3814. to give his life in Vietnam.
  3815.  
  3816. 855
  3817. 01:17:12,753 --> 01:17:18,634
  3818. So, I really didn't know what to say
  3819. to the guys that I was meeting in Venice.
  3820.  
  3821. 856
  3822. 01:17:18,717 --> 01:17:22,220
  3823. I sat there for most of the afternoon
  3824. and I just listened.
  3825.  
  3826. 857
  3827. 01:17:23,180 --> 01:17:27,267
  3828. Then in 1982, I wrote
  3829. and I recorded my soldier story.
  3830.  
  3831. 858
  3832. 01:17:27,351 --> 01:17:29,770
  3833. It was a protest song, a GI blues.
  3834.  
  3835. 859
  3836. 01:17:30,270 --> 01:17:33,148
  3837. The verses are just
  3838. an accounting of events.
  3839.  
  3840. 860
  3841. 01:17:33,940 --> 01:17:38,487
  3842. The choruses were a declaration
  3843. of your birthplace...
  3844.  
  3845. 861
  3846. 01:17:38,987 --> 01:17:41,782
  3847. and the right to all of the blood
  3848. and the confusion
  3849.  
  3850. 862
  3851. 01:17:41,865 --> 01:17:45,118
  3852. and the pride and the shame
  3853. and the grace...
  3854.  
  3855. 863
  3856. 01:17:47,079 --> 01:17:48,955
  3857. that comes with birthplace.
  3858.  
  3859. 864
  3860. 01:17:50,040 --> 01:17:54,461
  3861. In 1969, Mad Dog, Little Vinnie,
  3862. and myself,
  3863.  
  3864. 865
  3865. 01:17:55,212 --> 01:17:59,633
  3866. we were all drafted on the exact same day.
  3867.  
  3868. 866
  3869. 01:18:00,133 --> 01:18:01,218
  3870. All three of us.
  3871.  
  3872. 867
  3873. 01:18:01,301 --> 01:18:05,597
  3874. We rode together early one Monday morning
  3875. from the Selective Service Office
  3876.  
  3877. 868
  3878. 01:18:05,681 --> 01:18:10,060
  3879. on probably the unhappiest bus
  3880. that ever pulled out of Asbury Park,
  3881.  
  3882. 869
  3883. 01:18:10,143 --> 01:18:12,229
  3884. because we were on our way
  3885.  
  3886. 870
  3887. 01:18:12,312 --> 01:18:16,108
  3888. to what we were sure
  3889. was going to be our funeral.
  3890.  
  3891. 871
  3892. 01:18:16,942 --> 01:18:20,278
  3893. We'd seen it already, up very close.
  3894.  
  3895. 872
  3896. 01:18:22,739 --> 01:18:28,078
  3897. When we got to the Newark Draft Board,
  3898. we did everything we could not to go.
  3899.  
  3900. 873
  3901. 01:18:28,453 --> 01:18:31,039
  3902. And we succeeded, all three of us.
  3903.  
  3904. 874
  3905. 01:18:31,123 --> 01:18:32,666
  3906. When I go to Washington,
  3907.  
  3908. 875
  3909. 01:18:32,749 --> 01:18:35,544
  3910. and I have the occasion
  3911. to visit Walter and Bart,
  3912.  
  3913. 876
  3914. 01:18:35,877 --> 01:18:40,298
  3915. I'm glad that Mad Dog's, Little Vinnie's,
  3916.  
  3917. 877
  3918. 01:18:41,216 --> 01:18:45,637
  3919. for that matter,
  3920. my name isn't up on... on that wall.
  3921.  
  3922. 878
  3923. 01:18:45,721 --> 01:18:50,142
  3924. But it was 1969, and thousands
  3925. and thousands of young men to come
  3926.  
  3927. 879
  3928. 01:18:50,809 --> 01:18:54,479
  3929. would be called, simply sacrificed,
  3930.  
  3931. 880
  3932. 01:18:54,563 --> 01:18:57,566
  3933. just to save face for the powers that be
  3934.  
  3935. 881
  3936. 01:18:57,983 --> 01:18:59,860
  3937. who, by then, already knew.
  3938.  
  3939. 882
  3940. 01:19:00,944 --> 01:19:02,821
  3941. They knew it was a lost cause.
  3942.  
  3943. 883
  3944. 01:19:06,241 --> 01:19:08,577
  3945. And still, thousands and thousands...
  3946.  
  3947. 884
  3948. 01:19:09,745 --> 01:19:11,329
  3949. of more young boys.
  3950.  
  3951. 885
  3952. 01:19:13,039 --> 01:19:14,040
  3953. So, uh...
  3954.  
  3955. 886
  3956. 01:19:18,420 --> 01:19:21,590
  3957. So I do sometimes wonder
  3958. who went in my place.
  3959.  
  3960. 887
  3961. 01:19:22,716 --> 01:19:24,468
  3962. Because somebody did.
  3963.  
  3964. 888
  3965. 01:24:12,756 --> 01:24:13,673
  3966. Now...
  3967.  
  3968. 889
  3969. 01:24:14,549 --> 01:24:19,304
  3970. a real rock 'n' roll band
  3971. evolves out of a common place and time.
  3972.  
  3973. 890
  3974. 01:24:19,763 --> 01:24:24,559
  3975. Bands come out of towns,
  3976. out of a city, out of a neighborhood.
  3977.  
  3978. 891
  3979. 01:24:25,268 --> 01:24:28,354
  3980. And they come along
  3981. at a particular moment, you know?
  3982.  
  3983. 892
  3984. 01:24:28,855 --> 01:24:32,150
  3985. Bands are all about what happens
  3986. when musicians
  3987.  
  3988. 893
  3989. 01:24:32,650 --> 01:24:34,819
  3990. who come from the same streets,
  3991.  
  3992. 894
  3993. 01:24:35,236 --> 01:24:42,202
  3994. with the same passions and influences,
  3995. go in search of lightning and thunder!
  3996.  
  3997. 895
  3998. 01:24:42,285 --> 01:24:44,370
  3999. They come together in a whole
  4000.  
  4001. 896
  4002. 01:24:44,454 --> 01:24:47,082
  4003. that is greater than the sum
  4004. of their parts.
  4005.  
  4006. 897
  4007. 01:24:47,165 --> 01:24:50,376
  4008. They may not be the best players.
  4009. That's not necessary.
  4010.  
  4011. 898
  4012. 01:24:50,460 --> 01:24:54,130
  4013. They need to be the right players
  4014. and when they play together,
  4015.  
  4016. 899
  4017. 01:24:54,214 --> 01:24:57,967
  4018. there is a communion of souls
  4019.  
  4020. 900
  4021. 01:24:58,551 --> 01:25:02,597
  4022. and a natural brotherhood
  4023. and sisterhood manifests itself,
  4024.  
  4025. 901
  4026. 01:25:02,680 --> 01:25:05,767
  4027. and a quest, a quest is begun.
  4028.  
  4029. 902
  4030. 01:25:05,850 --> 01:25:07,977
  4031. You're in search of something,
  4032.  
  4033. 903
  4034. 01:25:08,269 --> 01:25:10,188
  4035. an adventure's undertaken.
  4036.  
  4037. 904
  4038. 01:25:10,730 --> 01:25:12,607
  4039. And you ride shotgun.
  4040.  
  4041. 905
  4042. 01:25:14,025 --> 01:25:19,656
  4043. In a real band, the principles of math
  4044. get stood on their head.
  4045.  
  4046. 906
  4047. 01:25:20,281 --> 01:25:22,325
  4048. And one plus one equals three.
  4049.  
  4050. 907
  4051. 01:25:34,045 --> 01:25:37,090
  4052. Now one plus one equals two,
  4053. that happens every day.
  4054.  
  4055. 908
  4056. 01:25:37,382 --> 01:25:40,677
  4057. That is not magic. That's the grind.
  4058.  
  4059. 909
  4060. 01:25:41,052 --> 01:25:42,971
  4061. That's when you get up, one,
  4062.  
  4063. 910
  4064. 01:25:43,054 --> 01:25:46,015
  4065. go to work, one, go to bed...
  4066.  
  4067. 911
  4068. 01:25:46,766 --> 01:25:48,852
  4069. Two.
  4070.  
  4071. 912
  4072. 01:25:49,435 --> 01:25:52,522
  4073. Two, geniuses, two.
  4074.  
  4075. 913
  4076. 01:25:53,690 --> 01:25:58,361
  4077. But when one plus one equals three,
  4078. that's when your life changes
  4079.  
  4080. 914
  4081. 01:25:58,945 --> 01:26:00,780
  4082. and you see everything new.
  4083.  
  4084. 915
  4085. 01:26:01,614 --> 01:26:05,243
  4086. And these are days
  4087. when you are visited by visions...
  4088.  
  4089. 916
  4090. 01:26:06,035 --> 01:26:08,580
  4091. when the world around you
  4092. brings down the spirit,
  4093.  
  4094. 917
  4095. 01:26:08,663 --> 01:26:10,957
  4096. and you feel blessed to be alive.
  4097.  
  4098. 918
  4099. 01:26:12,542 --> 01:26:15,420
  4100. It is the essential equation of love.
  4101.  
  4102. 919
  4103. 01:26:15,503 --> 01:26:18,923
  4104. There is no love without one plus one
  4105. equaling three.
  4106.  
  4107. 920
  4108. 01:26:19,007 --> 01:26:21,509
  4109. It's the essential equation of art.
  4110.  
  4111. 921
  4112. 01:26:21,593 --> 01:26:23,970
  4113. It's the essential equation
  4114. of rock 'n' roll.
  4115.  
  4116. 922
  4117. 01:26:24,053 --> 01:26:28,141
  4118. It's the reason the universe
  4119. will never be fully comprehensible.
  4120.  
  4121. 923
  4122. 01:26:28,224 --> 01:26:33,188
  4123. It's the reason "Louie Louie"
  4124. will never be fully comprehensible.
  4125.  
  4126. 924
  4127. 01:26:35,440 --> 01:26:38,026
  4128. And it's the reason true rock 'n' roll
  4129.  
  4130. 925
  4131. 01:26:38,109 --> 01:26:41,988
  4132. and true rock 'n' roll bands
  4133. will never die.
  4134.  
  4135. 926
  4136. 01:28:18,209 --> 01:28:21,879
  4137. Now, Gary, Danny, Little Steven,
  4138. Mighty Max, Professor Roy,
  4139.  
  4140. 927
  4141. 01:28:21,963 --> 01:28:26,634
  4142. Nils Lofgren, Patti Scialfa,
  4143. that is my one plus one equals...
  4144.  
  4145. 928
  4146. 01:28:26,718 --> 01:28:30,221
  4147. - Three!
  4148. - Excellent, grasshopper.
  4149.  
  4150. 929
  4151. 01:28:32,098 --> 01:28:34,642
  4152. But nobody captured
  4153. my audience's imagination
  4154.  
  4155. 930
  4156. 01:28:34,726 --> 01:28:36,644
  4157. or their hearts like Clarence.
  4158.  
  4159. 931
  4160. 01:28:42,066 --> 01:28:43,359
  4161. Clarence was...
  4162.  
  4163. 932
  4164. 01:28:44,068 --> 01:28:46,988
  4165. Clarence was a figure
  4166. out of a rock 'n' roll storybook,
  4167.  
  4168. 933
  4169. 01:28:47,071 --> 01:28:50,325
  4170. and together, we told a story
  4171. that was bigger than...
  4172.  
  4173. 934
  4174. 01:28:50,950 --> 01:28:53,411
  4175. any of the ones I'd written in my songs.
  4176.  
  4177. 935
  4178. 01:28:53,494 --> 01:28:57,040
  4179. It was the story where,
  4180. not only did Scooter and the Big Man
  4181.  
  4182. 936
  4183. 01:28:57,123 --> 01:28:58,708
  4184. bust the city in half...
  4185.  
  4186. 937
  4187. 01:28:59,584 --> 01:29:01,377
  4188. but we remade the city.
  4189.  
  4190. 938
  4191. 01:29:02,337 --> 01:29:05,048
  4192. We remade the city,
  4193. shaping it into the kind of place
  4194.  
  4195. 939
  4196. 01:29:05,131 --> 01:29:09,802
  4197. where our friendship
  4198. and our love for one another
  4199.  
  4200. 940
  4201. 01:29:11,220 --> 01:29:13,556
  4202. wouldn't have been
  4203. such an exceptional thing.
  4204.  
  4205. 941
  4206. 01:29:15,099 --> 01:29:18,019
  4207. First night I saw Clarence,
  4208. he came walking out of the shadows
  4209.  
  4210. 942
  4211. 01:29:18,102 --> 01:29:19,312
  4212. towards the bandstand,
  4213.  
  4214. 943
  4215. 01:29:19,395 --> 01:29:24,192
  4216. nodded to me, got up,
  4217. stood to my right for the very first time.
  4218.  
  4219. 944
  4220. 01:29:24,442 --> 01:29:26,486
  4221. He picked up his saxophone.
  4222.  
  4223. 945
  4224. 01:29:27,445 --> 01:29:29,072
  4225. And when he played...
  4226.  
  4227. 946
  4228. 01:29:36,412 --> 01:29:39,665
  4229. When he played,
  4230. he whispered that story in my ear.
  4231.  
  4232. 947
  4233. 01:29:42,585 --> 01:29:44,962
  4234. And then we whispered it into your ear.
  4235.  
  4236. 948
  4237. 01:29:47,548 --> 01:29:50,718
  4238. And we carried it together for a long...
  4239.  
  4240. 949
  4241. 01:29:53,179 --> 01:29:54,931
  4242. a long, good time.
  4243.  
  4244. 950
  4245. 01:29:57,475 --> 01:29:59,936
  4246. The Big Man was big.
  4247.  
  4248. 951
  4249. 01:30:01,145 --> 01:30:02,897
  4250. Everything about him.
  4251.  
  4252. 952
  4253. 01:30:03,398 --> 01:30:06,984
  4254. His personality, his size, his laugh...
  4255.  
  4256. 953
  4257. 01:30:07,568 --> 01:30:09,779
  4258. the sound of his saxophone.
  4259.  
  4260. 954
  4261. 01:30:10,613 --> 01:30:14,158
  4262. When I first heard it, I thought it was
  4263. the biggest sound I ever heard.
  4264.  
  4265. 955
  4266. 01:30:15,618 --> 01:30:16,869
  4267. And it was.
  4268.  
  4269. 956
  4270. 01:30:18,371 --> 01:30:23,334
  4271. His heart and his problems,
  4272. they were big.
  4273.  
  4274. 957
  4275. 01:30:27,380 --> 01:30:29,924
  4276. But he was elemental in my life.
  4277.  
  4278. 958
  4279. 01:30:32,218 --> 01:30:34,720
  4280. And losing him was like losing the rain.
  4281.  
  4282. 959
  4283. 01:30:53,739 --> 01:30:55,992
  4284. If I were a mystic...
  4285.  
  4286. 960
  4287. 01:30:56,742 --> 01:30:59,620
  4288. If I were a mystic,
  4289. I guess Clarence and my's friendship
  4290.  
  4291. 961
  4292. 01:30:59,704 --> 01:31:03,082
  4293. would lead me to believe
  4294. that we-- we stood together
  4295.  
  4296. 962
  4297. 01:31:03,166 --> 01:31:04,709
  4298. in other older times.
  4299.  
  4300. 963
  4301. 01:31:05,918 --> 01:31:07,003
  4302. You know, in, uh...
  4303.  
  4304. 964
  4305. 01:31:07,503 --> 01:31:08,880
  4306. in other lives.
  4307.  
  4308. 965
  4309. 01:31:10,089 --> 01:31:11,632
  4310. Along other rivers.
  4311.  
  4312. 966
  4313. 01:31:13,885 --> 01:31:15,678
  4314. In other ancient cities.
  4315.  
  4316. 967
  4317. 01:31:16,804 --> 01:31:18,347
  4318. In other fields...
  4319.  
  4320. 968
  4321. 01:31:19,390 --> 01:31:21,225
  4322. working side by side,
  4323.  
  4324. 969
  4325. 01:31:22,643 --> 01:31:24,187
  4326. with the sun setting,
  4327.  
  4328. 970
  4329. 01:31:25,521 --> 01:31:28,191
  4330. doing our modest version of God's work.
  4331.  
  4332. 971
  4333. 01:31:34,572 --> 01:31:36,824
  4334. I'll see you in the next life, Big Man.
  4335.  
  4336. 972
  4337. 01:32:30,294 --> 01:32:33,714
  4338. Ladies and gentlemen, let's hear it
  4339. for the biggest man you ever saw.
  4340.  
  4341. 973
  4342. 01:32:36,300 --> 01:32:41,138
  4343. Clarence "Big Man" Clemons!
  4344.  
  4345. 974
  4346. 01:32:46,185 --> 01:32:48,145
  4347. And the legendary...
  4348.  
  4349. 975
  4350. 01:32:50,815 --> 01:32:54,527
  4351. - E...
  4352. - Street Band!
  4353.  
  4354. 976
  4355. 01:32:55,695 --> 01:32:56,654
  4356. That's it!
  4357.  
  4358. 977
  4359. 01:33:18,926 --> 01:33:23,472
  4360. All right, all right,
  4361. she is the queen of my heart!
  4362.  
  4363. 978
  4364. 01:33:24,807 --> 01:33:27,184
  4365. She is my flaming beauty!
  4366.  
  4367. 979
  4368. 01:33:27,560 --> 01:33:30,021
  4369. - Patricia!
  4370. - My Jersey girl.
  4371.  
  4372. 980
  4373. 01:33:30,396 --> 01:33:31,939
  4374. She is a great songwriter.
  4375.  
  4376. 981
  4377. 01:33:32,023 --> 01:33:34,442
  4378. She's one of the loveliest voices
  4379. I've ever heard.
  4380.  
  4381. 982
  4382. 01:33:34,525 --> 01:33:37,862
  4383. She is smart, tough... but fragile.
  4384.  
  4385. 983
  4386. 01:33:39,280 --> 01:33:40,698
  4387. Don't forget that part.
  4388.  
  4389. 984
  4390. 01:33:40,781 --> 01:33:43,909
  4391. If we love those in whose company's
  4392. reflected the best of us,
  4393.  
  4394. 985
  4395. 01:33:43,993 --> 01:33:46,245
  4396. that's the light that she shines on me.
  4397.  
  4398. 986
  4399. 01:33:46,537 --> 01:33:49,790
  4400. In 1984 one night, I'm hanging out
  4401. at the Stone Pony
  4402.  
  4403. 987
  4404. 01:33:49,874 --> 01:33:54,879
  4405. and this beautiful redhead shows up,
  4406. sits in with the Sunday night house band.
  4407.  
  4408. 988
  4409. 01:33:55,379 --> 01:33:58,549
  4410. And that is the night
  4411. I fell in love with Patti's voice.
  4412.  
  4413. 989
  4414. 01:33:58,633 --> 01:34:01,093
  4415. She got on stage, this blaze of red.
  4416.  
  4417. 990
  4418. 01:34:01,177 --> 01:34:04,972
  4419. She performed a great version
  4420. of The Exciters' hit song "Tell Him."
  4421.  
  4422. 991
  4423. 01:34:05,348 --> 01:34:12,063
  4424. So the first line of the first song
  4425. I ever heard Patti sing was...
  4426.  
  4427. 992
  4428. 01:34:19,487 --> 01:34:22,531
  4429. She does. Ladies and gentlemen,
  4430. Patti Scialfa.
  4431.  
  4432. 993
  4433. 01:34:36,295 --> 01:34:37,380
  4434. Thank you.
  4435.  
  4436. 994
  4437. 01:39:14,281 --> 01:39:15,783
  4438. Yeah, trust...
  4439.  
  4440. 995
  4441. 01:39:17,076 --> 01:39:19,703
  4442. Trust in a relationship's a fragile thing.
  4443.  
  4444. 996
  4445. 01:39:20,955 --> 01:39:23,916
  4446. Uh... Always been a little complicated
  4447. for me
  4448.  
  4449. 997
  4450. 01:39:23,999 --> 01:39:26,377
  4451. because trust requires allowing others
  4452.  
  4453. 998
  4454. 01:39:27,544 --> 01:39:31,548
  4455. to see as much of our real selves
  4456. as we have the courage to reveal.
  4457.  
  4458. 999
  4459. 01:39:32,758 --> 01:39:34,051
  4460. But, I mean, uh...
  4461.  
  4462. 1000
  4463. 01:39:34,885 --> 01:39:37,429
  4464. I don't want to see my real self.
  4465. Why would...?
  4466.  
  4467. 1001
  4468. 01:39:38,305 --> 01:39:41,809
  4469. - Why would others want to?
  4470. - You know? But...
  4471.  
  4472. 1002
  4473. 01:39:41,892 --> 01:39:45,646
  4474. But it means allowing others to see
  4475. behind our many masks,
  4476.  
  4477. 1003
  4478. 01:39:46,313 --> 01:39:49,108
  4479. the masks we wear, overcoming that fear.
  4480.  
  4481. 1004
  4482. 01:39:49,984 --> 01:39:52,987
  4483. Or rather, learning how to love
  4484. and how to trust in spite of it.
  4485.  
  4486. 1005
  4487. 01:39:53,737 --> 01:39:55,447
  4488. That takes a little courage...
  4489.  
  4490. 1006
  4491. 01:39:56,115 --> 01:39:57,908
  4492. and a very strong partner.
  4493.  
  4494. 1007
  4495. 01:39:58,867 --> 01:40:00,953
  4496. 'Cause in this life,
  4497. you make your choices,
  4498.  
  4499. 1008
  4500. 01:40:01,036 --> 01:40:02,204
  4501. you take your stand,
  4502.  
  4503. 1009
  4504. 01:40:02,287 --> 01:40:05,541
  4505. and you awaken
  4506. from that youthful spell of immortality
  4507.  
  4508. 1010
  4509. 01:40:05,624 --> 01:40:08,419
  4510. where it feels like the road
  4511. is gonna go on forever.
  4512.  
  4513. 1011
  4514. 01:40:09,837 --> 01:40:15,634
  4515. And you walk alongside your chosen partner
  4516. with the clock ticking.
  4517.  
  4518. 1012
  4519. 01:40:16,635 --> 01:40:21,473
  4520. And you recognize that life is finite,
  4521. that you've got just so much time.
  4522.  
  4523. 1013
  4524. 01:40:22,057 --> 01:40:23,475
  4525. And so together...
  4526.  
  4527. 1014
  4528. 01:40:24,184 --> 01:40:27,771
  4529. you name the things that will give
  4530. your life in that time its meaning,
  4531.  
  4532. 1015
  4533. 01:40:29,064 --> 01:40:32,735
  4534. its purpose, its fullness,
  4535. its very reality.
  4536.  
  4537. 1016
  4538. 01:40:33,944 --> 01:40:36,947
  4539. And this is what you build together.
  4540. This is...
  4541.  
  4542. 1017
  4543. 01:40:38,198 --> 01:40:40,284
  4544. what your love consists of.
  4545.  
  4546. 1018
  4547. 01:40:41,160 --> 01:40:42,911
  4548. This is what you...
  4549.  
  4550. 1019
  4551. 01:40:44,329 --> 01:40:46,373
  4552. This is your life, you know?
  4553.  
  4554. 1020
  4555. 01:40:47,332 --> 01:40:50,586
  4556. And these are things
  4557. that you can hold onto
  4558.  
  4559. 1021
  4560. 01:40:51,253 --> 01:40:52,880
  4561. when the storms come,
  4562.  
  4563. 1022
  4564. 01:40:54,298 --> 01:40:55,466
  4565. as they will.
  4566.  
  4567. 1023
  4568. 01:45:28,447 --> 01:45:30,198
  4569. Patti Scialfa!
  4570.  
  4571. 1024
  4572. 01:45:31,867 --> 01:45:33,577
  4573. She's a badass!
  4574.  
  4575. 1025
  4576. 01:45:44,755 --> 01:45:47,132
  4577. Gonna add this song to our set tonight.
  4578.  
  4579. 1026
  4580. 01:45:48,050 --> 01:45:52,804
  4581. All right, this is the final days
  4582. of Patti's first pregnancy.
  4583.  
  4584. 1027
  4585. 01:45:53,555 --> 01:45:58,477
  4586. I receive a surprise visit
  4587. from my father at my home in LA.
  4588.  
  4589. 1028
  4590. 01:45:58,560 --> 01:46:01,438
  4591. You know, he had driven 500 miles,
  4592. unannounced,
  4593.  
  4594. 1029
  4595. 01:46:02,022 --> 01:46:03,523
  4596. to knock on my door.
  4597.  
  4598. 1030
  4599. 01:46:04,608 --> 01:46:05,859
  4600. That's his style.
  4601.  
  4602. 1031
  4603. 01:46:06,485 --> 01:46:08,487
  4604. So at 11:00 a.m., we sit
  4605.  
  4606. 1032
  4607. 01:46:08,570 --> 01:46:11,907
  4608. in the sunlit dining room
  4609. and we're nursing morning beers.
  4610.  
  4611. 1033
  4612. 01:46:13,241 --> 01:46:15,327
  4613. That's his style.
  4614.  
  4615. 1034
  4616. 01:46:15,410 --> 01:46:17,746
  4617. It's my father's breakfast of champions.
  4618.  
  4619. 1035
  4620. 01:46:18,789 --> 01:46:24,294
  4621. When my dad, never a talkative man,
  4622. right, blurted out,
  4623.  
  4624. 1036
  4625. 01:46:25,045 --> 01:46:26,630
  4626. "You've been very good to us."
  4627.  
  4628. 1037
  4629. 01:46:27,798 --> 01:46:31,551
  4630. And I nodded that I had, you know?
  4631. And, uh...
  4632.  
  4633. 1038
  4634. 01:46:33,178 --> 01:46:36,098
  4635. And then he says,
  4636. "And I wasn't very good to you."
  4637.  
  4638. 1039
  4639. 01:46:39,059 --> 01:46:41,728
  4640. And the room just...
  4641.  
  4642. 1040
  4643. 01:46:44,815 --> 01:46:46,942
  4644. well, stood still...
  4645.  
  4646. 1041
  4647. 01:46:48,110 --> 01:46:52,239
  4648. as to my shock, the unacknowledgeable
  4649. was being acknowledged.
  4650.  
  4651. 1042
  4652. 01:46:52,322 --> 01:46:53,156
  4653. If I...
  4654.  
  4655. 1043
  4656. 01:46:54,199 --> 01:46:57,160
  4657. If I didn't know better,
  4658. I would have sworn an apology...
  4659.  
  4660. 1044
  4661. 01:46:58,120 --> 01:47:00,080
  4662. of some sort was being made.
  4663.  
  4664. 1045
  4665. 01:47:01,081 --> 01:47:02,249
  4666. And it was.
  4667.  
  4668. 1046
  4669. 01:47:03,333 --> 01:47:06,503
  4670. Here in the last days, before I was...
  4671.  
  4672. 1047
  4673. 01:47:07,838 --> 01:47:11,299
  4674. to become a father,
  4675. my own father was visiting me...
  4676.  
  4677. 1048
  4678. 01:47:12,717 --> 01:47:15,220
  4679. to warn me of the mistakes
  4680. that he had made,
  4681.  
  4682. 1049
  4683. 01:47:16,054 --> 01:47:19,057
  4684. and to warn me not to make them
  4685. with my own children.
  4686.  
  4687. 1050
  4688. 01:47:20,559 --> 01:47:24,020
  4689. To release them
  4690. from the chain of our sins,
  4691.  
  4692. 1051
  4693. 01:47:24,104 --> 01:47:27,399
  4694. my father's and mine
  4695. and our fathers' before.
  4696.  
  4697. 1052
  4698. 01:47:28,733 --> 01:47:30,444
  4699. That they may be free...
  4700.  
  4701. 1053
  4702. 01:47:31,153 --> 01:47:34,364
  4703. to make their own choices
  4704. and to live their own lives.
  4705.  
  4706. 1054
  4707. 01:47:36,241 --> 01:47:41,329
  4708. We are ghosts or we are ancestors
  4709. in our children's lives.
  4710.  
  4711. 1055
  4712. 01:47:42,247 --> 01:47:46,084
  4713. We either lay our mistakes,
  4714. our burdens upon them
  4715.  
  4716. 1056
  4717. 01:47:46,543 --> 01:47:47,961
  4718. and we haunt them.
  4719.  
  4720. 1057
  4721. 01:47:49,129 --> 01:47:52,632
  4722. Or we assist them in laying
  4723. those old burdens down,
  4724.  
  4725. 1058
  4726. 01:47:52,966 --> 01:47:57,554
  4727. and we free them from the chain
  4728. of our own flawed behavior.
  4729.  
  4730. 1059
  4731. 01:47:58,763 --> 01:48:02,559
  4732. And as ancestors,
  4733. we walk alongside of them,
  4734.  
  4735. 1060
  4736. 01:48:03,268 --> 01:48:06,062
  4737. and we assist them
  4738. in finding their own way
  4739.  
  4740. 1061
  4741. 01:48:06,688 --> 01:48:08,440
  4742. and some transcendence.
  4743.  
  4744. 1062
  4745. 01:48:09,608 --> 01:48:11,026
  4746. My father...
  4747.  
  4748. 1063
  4749. 01:48:12,611 --> 01:48:16,364
  4750. on that day, was petitioning me
  4751.  
  4752. 1064
  4753. 01:48:17,240 --> 01:48:20,285
  4754. for an ancestral role in my life
  4755.  
  4756. 1065
  4757. 01:48:20,368 --> 01:48:24,706
  4758. after being a ghost for a long, long time.
  4759.  
  4760. 1066
  4761. 01:48:25,957 --> 01:48:30,754
  4762. He wanted me to write
  4763. a new end to our relationship,
  4764.  
  4765. 1067
  4766. 01:48:31,046 --> 01:48:34,841
  4767. and he wanted me to be ready
  4768. for the new beginning
  4769.  
  4770. 1068
  4771. 01:48:35,759 --> 01:48:37,969
  4772. that I was about to experience.
  4773.  
  4774. 1069
  4775. 01:48:42,599 --> 01:48:45,519
  4776. It was the greatest moment
  4777. in my life with my dad.
  4778.  
  4779. 1070
  4780. 01:48:46,353 --> 01:48:48,188
  4781. And it was all that I needed.
  4782.  
  4783. 1071
  4784. 01:48:56,321 --> 01:48:58,198
  4785. Yeah.
  4786.  
  4787. 1072
  4788. 01:52:47,802 --> 01:52:48,887
  4789. All right.
  4790.  
  4791. 1073
  4792. 01:52:49,888 --> 01:52:52,599
  4793. I never believed that people come
  4794. to my shows
  4795.  
  4796. 1074
  4797. 01:52:52,682 --> 01:52:55,477
  4798. or to rock shows in general
  4799. to be told anything.
  4800.  
  4801. 1075
  4802. 01:52:57,896 --> 01:52:58,730
  4803. But...
  4804.  
  4805. 1076
  4806. 01:52:59,481 --> 01:53:02,108
  4807. I do believe that they come
  4808. to be reminded of things,
  4809.  
  4810. 1077
  4811. 01:53:02,192 --> 01:53:04,986
  4812. to be reminded of who they are
  4813. at their most joyous,
  4814.  
  4815. 1078
  4816. 01:53:05,069 --> 01:53:07,322
  4817. at their deepest when life feels full.
  4818.  
  4819. 1079
  4820. 01:53:07,864 --> 01:53:10,408
  4821. It's a good place to get in touch
  4822. with your heart and your spirit.
  4823.  
  4824. 1080
  4825. 01:53:10,492 --> 01:53:12,285
  4826. It's good to be amongst the crowd,
  4827.  
  4828. 1081
  4829. 01:53:12,869 --> 01:53:15,622
  4830. be reminded of who we are
  4831. and who we can be collectively.
  4832.  
  4833. 1082
  4834. 01:53:15,705 --> 01:53:17,916
  4835. Music does those things pretty well.
  4836.  
  4837. 1083
  4838. 01:53:18,458 --> 01:53:21,669
  4839. Sometimes, they can come in pretty handy.
  4840.  
  4841. 1084
  4842. 01:53:22,587 --> 01:53:24,964
  4843. And particularly these days,
  4844. when some reminding
  4845.  
  4846. 1085
  4847. 01:53:25,548 --> 01:53:28,426
  4848. of who we are and who we can be
  4849. isn't such a bad thing.
  4850.  
  4851. 1086
  4852. 01:53:28,510 --> 01:53:29,552
  4853. You know?
  4854.  
  4855. 1087
  4856. 01:53:36,810 --> 01:53:40,730
  4857. I-- I refer back to the weekend
  4858. of the March for Our Lives
  4859.  
  4860. 1088
  4861. 01:53:40,814 --> 01:53:43,233
  4862. when we saw all those young people
  4863. in Washington,
  4864.  
  4865. 1089
  4866. 01:53:43,316 --> 01:53:45,318
  4867. and citizens all around the country,
  4868.  
  4869. 1090
  4870. 01:53:45,401 --> 01:53:48,029
  4871. remind us of what faith in America
  4872.  
  4873. 1091
  4874. 01:53:48,112 --> 01:53:50,698
  4875. and what real faith in American democracy
  4876.  
  4877. 1092
  4878. 01:53:51,241 --> 01:53:53,201
  4879. and how sacred that is.
  4880.  
  4881. 1093
  4882. 01:54:00,416 --> 01:54:01,543
  4883. You know...
  4884.  
  4885. 1094
  4886. 01:54:02,752 --> 01:54:07,298
  4887. that weekend, you just saw
  4888. what it actually looked and felt like.
  4889.  
  4890. 1095
  4891. 01:54:07,882 --> 01:54:09,467
  4892. It was just encouraging
  4893.  
  4894. 1096
  4895. 01:54:10,093 --> 01:54:12,428
  4896. to see all those people out on the street
  4897.  
  4898. 1097
  4899. 01:54:12,512 --> 01:54:16,599
  4900. and all that righteous passion alive
  4901. in the service of something good.
  4902.  
  4903. 1098
  4904. 01:54:17,517 --> 01:54:19,185
  4905. To see it's still there,
  4906.  
  4907. 1099
  4908. 01:54:20,186 --> 01:54:22,939
  4909. at the center of the beating heart
  4910. of our country...
  4911.  
  4912. 1100
  4913. 01:54:24,148 --> 01:54:25,233
  4914. and...
  4915.  
  4916. 1101
  4917. 01:54:26,901 --> 01:54:29,946
  4918. in spite of what we've been going through.
  4919. And it was a good day, you know?
  4920.  
  4921. 1102
  4922. 01:54:30,029 --> 01:54:31,239
  4923. It was just...
  4924.  
  4925. 1103
  4926. 01:54:31,948 --> 01:54:33,741
  4927. it was just one good day.
  4928.  
  4929. 1104
  4930. 01:54:34,784 --> 01:54:36,744
  4931. But it was a necessary day.
  4932.  
  4933. 1105
  4934. 01:54:37,370 --> 01:54:40,790
  4935. Because these are times
  4936. when we've also seen folks marching,
  4937.  
  4938. 1106
  4939. 01:54:40,874 --> 01:54:46,045
  4940. and in the highest offices of our land,
  4941. who want to speak to our darkest angels,
  4942.  
  4943. 1107
  4944. 01:54:46,379 --> 01:54:50,091
  4945. who want to call up the ugliest
  4946. and the most divisive ghosts
  4947.  
  4948. 1108
  4949. 01:54:50,174 --> 01:54:53,928
  4950. of America's past.
  4951. And they want to destroy the idea
  4952.  
  4953. 1109
  4954. 01:54:54,012 --> 01:54:56,764
  4955. of an America for all.
  4956. That's their intention.
  4957.  
  4958. 1110
  4959. 01:54:57,307 --> 01:54:59,517
  4960. That's what we've been seeing,
  4961. in the outrage
  4962.  
  4963. 1111
  4964. 01:54:59,601 --> 01:55:01,978
  4965. of the broken families on the border,
  4966.  
  4967. 1112
  4968. 01:55:02,061 --> 01:55:07,191
  4969. and in hate-filled marches
  4970. on American streets this year.
  4971.  
  4972. 1113
  4973. 01:55:07,567 --> 01:55:13,364
  4974. Things I never thought
  4975. I would see again in my lifetime.
  4976.  
  4977. 1114
  4978. 01:55:13,448 --> 01:55:17,327
  4979. Things that I thought
  4980. were dead and gone...
  4981.  
  4982. 1115
  4983. 01:55:18,036 --> 01:55:21,331
  4984. forever, on the ash heap of history.
  4985.  
  4986. 1116
  4987. 01:55:22,123 --> 01:55:23,249
  4988. You know...
  4989.  
  4990. 1117
  4991. 01:55:24,626 --> 01:55:26,920
  4992. We've come too far and worked too hard,
  4993.  
  4994. 1118
  4995. 01:55:27,003 --> 01:55:30,590
  4996. too many good people paid
  4997. too high a price,
  4998.  
  4999. 1119
  5000. 01:55:31,132 --> 01:55:35,678
  5001. paid with their lives,
  5002. to allow this to happen now.
  5003.  
  5004. 1120
  5005. 01:55:36,846 --> 01:55:38,723
  5006. You know...
  5007.  
  5008. 1121
  5009. 01:55:39,641 --> 01:55:42,936
  5010. There's been too much hard work done,
  5011.  
  5012. 1122
  5013. 01:55:43,853 --> 01:55:45,146
  5014. and sacrifice.
  5015.  
  5016. 1123
  5017. 01:55:46,940 --> 01:55:48,858
  5018. There's a beautiful quote by Dr. King
  5019.  
  5020. 1124
  5021. 01:55:48,942 --> 01:55:51,027
  5022. that says,
  5023. "The arc of the moral universe is long,
  5024.  
  5025. 1125
  5026. 01:55:51,110 --> 01:55:52,737
  5027. but it bends toward justice."
  5028.  
  5029. 1126
  5030. 01:55:53,488 --> 01:55:57,533
  5031. It is important to believe in those words
  5032. and to carry yourself
  5033.  
  5034. 1127
  5035. 01:55:58,117 --> 01:56:01,454
  5036. and to act accordingly,
  5037. to live with compassion.
  5038.  
  5039. 1128
  5040. 01:56:02,455 --> 01:56:05,166
  5041. And to have faith
  5042. in that what we're seeing now,
  5043.  
  5044. 1129
  5045. 01:56:05,750 --> 01:56:07,627
  5046. it's just another hard chapter...
  5047.  
  5048. 1130
  5049. 01:56:08,544 --> 01:56:11,464
  5050. in the long, long, ongoing battle
  5051.  
  5052. 1131
  5053. 01:56:12,465 --> 01:56:14,175
  5054. for the soul of the nation.
  5055.  
  5056. 1132
  5057. 02:05:24,934 --> 02:05:28,437
  5058. I always--
  5059. I always thought I was a typical American,
  5060.  
  5061. 1133
  5062. 02:05:28,521 --> 02:05:31,857
  5063. and so I fought my whole life,
  5064. and I studied and I played
  5065.  
  5066. 1134
  5067. 02:05:31,941 --> 02:05:33,734
  5068. and I worked,
  5069.  
  5070. 1135
  5071. 02:05:33,817 --> 02:05:37,404
  5072. 'cause I wanted to hear and I wanted
  5073. to know the whole American story.
  5074.  
  5075. 1136
  5076. 02:05:38,489 --> 02:05:41,825
  5077. I wanted to know my story
  5078. and your story.
  5079.  
  5080. 1137
  5081. 02:05:42,743 --> 02:05:45,538
  5082. I felt like I needed to understand
  5083. as much of it as I could
  5084.  
  5085. 1138
  5086. 02:05:45,621 --> 02:05:47,581
  5087. in order to understand myself.
  5088.  
  5089. 1139
  5090. 02:05:48,290 --> 02:05:50,334
  5091. You know? Who was I? And...
  5092.  
  5093. 1140
  5094. 02:05:51,627 --> 02:05:54,046
  5095. where I came from and what that meant.
  5096.  
  5097. 1141
  5098. 02:05:54,880 --> 02:05:58,300
  5099. What did it mean to my family?
  5100. Where was I going?
  5101.  
  5102. 1142
  5103. 02:05:59,426 --> 02:06:01,762
  5104. Where were we going together
  5105. as a people?
  5106.  
  5107. 1143
  5108. 02:06:02,346 --> 02:06:05,474
  5109. And-- and what did it mean
  5110. to be an American?
  5111.  
  5112. 1144
  5113. 02:06:05,975 --> 02:06:11,689
  5114. And to be a part of that story
  5115. in this place and in this time.
  5116.  
  5117. 1145
  5118. 02:06:12,815 --> 02:06:16,193
  5119. I wanted to be able to celebrate
  5120. and honor its beauty,
  5121.  
  5122. 1146
  5123. 02:06:17,570 --> 02:06:18,779
  5124. its power.
  5125.  
  5126. 1147
  5127. 02:06:19,697 --> 02:06:21,949
  5128. And I wanted to be able
  5129. to be a critical voice
  5130.  
  5131. 1148
  5132. 02:06:22,032 --> 02:06:24,910
  5133. when I thought that
  5134. that's what the times called for.
  5135.  
  5136. 1149
  5137. 02:06:25,536 --> 02:06:26,954
  5138. But most of all,
  5139.  
  5140. 1150
  5141. 02:06:27,037 --> 02:06:31,000
  5142. more than anything else, I wanted
  5143. to be able to tell that story well to you.
  5144.  
  5145. 1151
  5146. 02:06:32,418 --> 02:06:34,920
  5147. That was my young promise to myself.
  5148.  
  5149. 1152
  5150. 02:06:35,588 --> 02:06:37,756
  5151. And this was my young promise to you.
  5152.  
  5153. 1153
  5154. 02:06:38,215 --> 02:06:40,426
  5155. From when I was a very young man,
  5156.  
  5157. 1154
  5158. 02:06:41,176 --> 02:06:43,262
  5159. I took my fun very seriously.
  5160.  
  5161. 1155
  5162. 02:06:43,345 --> 02:06:45,180
  5163. You know?
  5164.  
  5165. 1156
  5166. 02:06:45,264 --> 02:06:47,975
  5167. And this is what I have pursued
  5168. as my service.
  5169.  
  5170. 1157
  5171. 02:06:48,058 --> 02:06:51,937
  5172. I still believe in it as such.
  5173. This is what I've presented to you
  5174.  
  5175. 1158
  5176. 02:06:52,021 --> 02:06:55,524
  5177. all these years
  5178. as my long and noisy prayer,
  5179.  
  5180. 1159
  5181. 02:06:55,608 --> 02:06:58,986
  5182. as my magic trick.
  5183.  
  5184. 1160
  5185. 02:07:04,950 --> 02:07:06,201
  5186. I wanted...
  5187.  
  5188. 1161
  5189. 02:07:06,952 --> 02:07:10,414
  5190. I wanted to rock your very soul!
  5191.  
  5192. 1162
  5193. 02:07:10,914 --> 02:07:14,960
  5194. And have you bring it home
  5195. and pass it on and...
  5196.  
  5197. 1163
  5198. 02:07:15,544 --> 02:07:20,549
  5199. I wanted it to be sung and altered by you
  5200. and your folks and your children,
  5201.  
  5202. 1164
  5203. 02:07:20,633 --> 02:07:21,967
  5204. should they be interested.
  5205.  
  5206. 1165
  5207. 02:07:22,885 --> 02:07:25,429
  5208. I wanted it to be something
  5209. that you could call on
  5210.  
  5211. 1166
  5212. 02:07:25,512 --> 02:07:27,181
  5213. when things were good.
  5214.  
  5215. 1167
  5216. 02:07:28,140 --> 02:07:29,016
  5217. And, uh...
  5218.  
  5219. 1168
  5220. 02:07:29,975 --> 02:07:31,894
  5221. and when things were not so good.
  5222.  
  5223. 1169
  5224. 02:07:32,811 --> 02:07:36,523
  5225. You know, that it might strengthen,
  5226. help make sense of...
  5227.  
  5228. 1170
  5229. 02:07:37,149 --> 02:07:40,569
  5230. your story and your life the way
  5231. that you strengthen me and help me
  5232.  
  5233. 1171
  5234. 02:07:40,653 --> 02:07:43,614
  5235. make sense of my life.
  5236. You've provided me with purpose,
  5237.  
  5238. 1172
  5239. 02:07:44,239 --> 02:07:47,868
  5240. with meaning and with a great,
  5241. great amount of joy.
  5242.  
  5243. 1173
  5244. 02:07:48,369 --> 02:07:49,828
  5245. I hope I've done that for you
  5246.  
  5247. 1174
  5248. 02:07:49,912 --> 02:07:52,373
  5249. and that I've been
  5250. a good traveling companion.
  5251.  
  5252. 1175
  5253. 02:07:56,960 --> 02:08:01,548
  5254. Remember that the future
  5255. is not yet written.
  5256.  
  5257. 1176
  5258. 02:08:02,049 --> 02:08:07,680
  5259. So when things look dark,
  5260. do as my mighty mom would insist,
  5261.  
  5262. 1177
  5263. 02:08:08,097 --> 02:08:11,975
  5264. lace up your dancing shoes
  5265. and get to work.
  5266.  
  5267. 1178
  5268. 02:10:12,763 --> 02:10:14,640
  5269. There's a joke here somewhere.
  5270.  
  5271. 1179
  5272. 02:10:15,849 --> 02:10:17,935
  5273. When I figure it out, I'll let you know.
  5274.  
  5275. 1180
  5276. 02:15:48,849 --> 02:15:50,142
  5277. Whoo!
  5278.  
  5279. 1181
  5280. 02:16:12,789 --> 02:16:14,082
  5281. Thank you.
  5282.  
  5283. 1182
  5284. 02:16:14,416 --> 02:16:15,667
  5285. Please...
  5286.  
  5287. 1183
  5288. 02:16:16,251 --> 02:16:19,045
  5289. be seated.
  5290.  
  5291. 1184
  5292. 02:16:19,713 --> 02:16:23,592
  5293. It was a beautiful fall November evening.
  5294. It was during the writing of my book.
  5295.  
  5296. 1185
  5297. 02:16:23,967 --> 02:16:26,678
  5298. I drove back to my neighborhood
  5299. where I grew up,
  5300.  
  5301. 1186
  5302. 02:16:27,554 --> 02:16:28,889
  5303. looking for, uh...
  5304.  
  5305. 1187
  5306. 02:16:31,850 --> 02:16:33,560
  5307. I still don't have a fucking clue.
  5308.  
  5309. 1188
  5310. 02:16:33,643 --> 02:16:35,353
  5311. All right?
  5312.  
  5313. 1189
  5314. 02:16:35,437 --> 02:16:36,771
  5315. But, uh...
  5316.  
  5317. 1190
  5318. 02:16:37,689 --> 02:16:39,774
  5319. All I know is the streets were dead empty
  5320.  
  5321. 1191
  5322. 02:16:39,858 --> 02:16:44,529
  5323. and the whole place looked
  5324. like it had been locked down since 1955.
  5325.  
  5326. 1192
  5327. 02:16:45,447 --> 02:16:47,782
  5328. My corner church was silent and unchanged,
  5329.  
  5330. 1193
  5331. 02:16:47,866 --> 02:16:50,118
  5332. no weddings, no funerals. I...
  5333.  
  5334. 1194
  5335. 02:16:50,577 --> 02:16:53,455
  5336. rolled slowly another 50 yards up my block
  5337.  
  5338. 1195
  5339. 02:16:53,538 --> 02:16:56,208
  5340. to visit my great tree, and it was gone.
  5341.  
  5342. 1196
  5343. 02:16:57,584 --> 02:17:02,005
  5344. It had been cut to the street
  5345. since the last time I had drove through.
  5346.  
  5347. 1197
  5348. 02:17:02,797 --> 02:17:06,176
  5349. So I got out of the car
  5350. and I looked down and there was a...
  5351.  
  5352. 1198
  5353. 02:17:06,927 --> 02:17:11,097
  5354. square of musty earth that held
  5355. the remaining snakes of its roots
  5356.  
  5357. 1199
  5358. 02:17:11,181 --> 02:17:13,058
  5359. on the edge of a parking lot.
  5360.  
  5361. 1200
  5362. 02:17:13,516 --> 02:17:16,728
  5363. So I reached down and I picked up
  5364. a handful of dirt
  5365.  
  5366. 1201
  5367. 02:17:17,103 --> 02:17:19,522
  5368. and I just kind of ran it
  5369. through my hands.
  5370.  
  5371. 1202
  5372. 02:17:20,774 --> 02:17:23,151
  5373. And my heart sank like...
  5374.  
  5375. 1203
  5376. 02:17:24,110 --> 02:17:26,947
  5377. like a kid who had suffered
  5378. some irretrievable loss.
  5379.  
  5380. 1204
  5381. 02:17:27,030 --> 02:17:28,448
  5382. You know, like some...
  5383.  
  5384. 1205
  5385. 02:17:29,824 --> 02:17:32,827
  5386. some piece of me was gone.
  5387.  
  5388. 1206
  5389. 02:17:34,913 --> 02:17:36,206
  5390. Um...
  5391.  
  5392. 1207
  5393. 02:17:38,416 --> 02:17:40,835
  5394. I don't know. I guess I...
  5395.  
  5396. 1208
  5397. 02:17:43,338 --> 02:17:46,091
  5398. It was just it had been there
  5399. long before I was.
  5400.  
  5401. 1209
  5402. 02:17:46,174 --> 02:17:49,177
  5403. I assumed it would be there
  5404. long after I was gone.
  5405.  
  5406. 1210
  5407. 02:17:49,261 --> 02:17:51,054
  5408. And I liked that.
  5409.  
  5410. 1211
  5411. 02:17:51,846 --> 02:17:53,723
  5412. It-- It felt eternal.
  5413.  
  5414. 1212
  5415. 02:17:54,307 --> 02:17:58,687
  5416. It was at the center of our street
  5417. and it had rooted
  5418.  
  5419. 1213
  5420. 02:17:59,854 --> 02:18:03,817
  5421. our neighborhood for so long.
  5422.  
  5423. 1214
  5424. 02:18:04,734 --> 02:18:07,821
  5425. So I sat there for a while
  5426. just cursing the county.
  5427.  
  5428. 1215
  5429. 02:18:08,655 --> 02:18:11,157
  5430. And listening to the sounds
  5431. of the evening come on,
  5432.  
  5433. 1216
  5434. 02:18:11,241 --> 02:18:14,244
  5435. and I looked again
  5436. and I realized it was gone, but some...
  5437.  
  5438. 1217
  5439. 02:18:15,245 --> 02:18:17,497
  5440. some essential piece of it
  5441. was still there,
  5442.  
  5443. 1218
  5444. 02:18:17,580 --> 02:18:20,166
  5445. the air and the space above its roots.
  5446.  
  5447. 1219
  5448. 02:18:20,792 --> 02:18:25,005
  5449. I could still feel the life
  5450. and the soul and the light
  5451.  
  5452. 1220
  5453. 02:18:25,964 --> 02:18:28,174
  5454. of my childhood friend there.
  5455.  
  5456. 1221
  5457. 02:18:29,467 --> 02:18:32,429
  5458. It's just that its leaves, its branches
  5459. and its massive trunk
  5460.  
  5461. 1222
  5462. 02:18:32,512 --> 02:18:36,599
  5463. were now outlined, shot through,
  5464.  
  5465. 1223
  5466. 02:18:37,392 --> 02:18:40,103
  5467. by evening stars and sky.
  5468.  
  5469. 1224
  5470. 02:18:41,271 --> 02:18:45,483
  5471. But my great tree's life couldn't be ended
  5472. or erased so easily
  5473.  
  5474. 1225
  5475. 02:18:46,234 --> 02:18:48,361
  5476. from this place, because it's history,
  5477.  
  5478. 1226
  5479. 02:18:49,154 --> 02:18:50,488
  5480. and history matters.
  5481.  
  5482. 1227
  5483. 02:18:51,531 --> 02:18:53,450
  5484. Its imprint was too great.
  5485.  
  5486. 1228
  5487. 02:18:53,533 --> 02:18:57,495
  5488. It was too old and it was too strong,
  5489. and it had been there too long...
  5490.  
  5491. 1229
  5492. 02:18:58,413 --> 02:19:00,415
  5493. to be done away with so easily.
  5494.  
  5495. 1230
  5496. 02:19:00,498 --> 02:19:02,125
  5497. It had stood witness
  5498.  
  5499. 1231
  5500. 02:19:02,959 --> 02:19:07,881
  5501. to everything that had happened
  5502. on these small streets beneath its arms.
  5503.  
  5504. 1232
  5505. 02:19:08,590 --> 02:19:09,883
  5506. All the joy...
  5507.  
  5508. 1233
  5509. 02:19:11,134 --> 02:19:12,677
  5510. and all the heartbreak.
  5511.  
  5512. 1234
  5513. 02:19:14,304 --> 02:19:15,764
  5514. And all the life.
  5515.  
  5516. 1235
  5517. 02:19:18,308 --> 02:19:23,396
  5518. And we live amongst ghosts,
  5519. always trying to reach us...
  5520.  
  5521. 1236
  5522. 02:19:25,732 --> 02:19:27,400
  5523. from that shadow world.
  5524.  
  5525. 1237
  5526. 02:19:28,360 --> 02:19:30,570
  5527. They're with us every step of the way.
  5528.  
  5529. 1238
  5530. 02:19:31,780 --> 02:19:34,282
  5531. You know,
  5532. my dead father's still with me every day.
  5533.  
  5534. 1239
  5535. 02:19:34,366 --> 02:19:36,785
  5536. I miss him, and if I had a wish...
  5537.  
  5538. 1240
  5539. 02:19:38,286 --> 02:19:39,746
  5540. Oh, man...
  5541.  
  5542. 1241
  5543. 02:19:41,748 --> 02:19:44,167
  5544. I wish he could have been here
  5545. to see this.
  5546.  
  5547. 1242
  5548. 02:19:47,962 --> 02:19:50,882
  5549. But I visit with him every night.
  5550.  
  5551. 1243
  5552. 02:19:52,050 --> 02:19:55,011
  5553. A little bit. That's a grace-filled thing.
  5554.  
  5555. 1244
  5556. 02:19:55,095 --> 02:19:56,930
  5557. And Clarence, I get to...
  5558.  
  5559. 1245
  5560. 02:19:57,931 --> 02:20:01,226
  5561. I get to see and be with Clarence
  5562. a little bit every night.
  5563.  
  5564. 1246
  5565. 02:20:02,602 --> 02:20:03,895
  5566. And Danny...
  5567.  
  5568. 1247
  5569. 02:20:04,562 --> 02:20:05,605
  5570. Walter,
  5571.  
  5572. 1248
  5573. 02:20:06,731 --> 02:20:07,774
  5574. and Bart.
  5575.  
  5576. 1249
  5577. 02:20:07,857 --> 02:20:10,568
  5578. My own family, so many of them gone...
  5579.  
  5580. 1250
  5581. 02:20:11,361 --> 02:20:15,240
  5582. from these houses that are now filled
  5583. by strangers, but the soul...
  5584.  
  5585. 1251
  5586. 02:20:15,907 --> 02:20:17,742
  5587. the soul is a stubborn thing.
  5588.  
  5589. 1252
  5590. 02:20:18,993 --> 02:20:21,204
  5591. It doesn't dissipate so quickly.
  5592.  
  5593. 1253
  5594. 02:20:21,287 --> 02:20:22,956
  5595. Souls remain.
  5596.  
  5597. 1254
  5598. 02:20:24,040 --> 02:20:26,042
  5599. They remain here in the air,
  5600.  
  5601. 1255
  5602. 02:20:26,668 --> 02:20:28,211
  5603. in empty space,
  5604.  
  5605. 1256
  5606. 02:20:28,920 --> 02:20:30,296
  5607. dusty roots,
  5608.  
  5609. 1257
  5610. 02:20:31,089 --> 02:20:33,675
  5611. in sidewalks
  5612. that I knew every single inch of
  5613.  
  5614. 1258
  5615. 02:20:33,758 --> 02:20:35,635
  5616. like I knew my own body
  5617.  
  5618. 1259
  5619. 02:20:36,261 --> 02:20:37,429
  5620. as a child...
  5621.  
  5622. 1260
  5623. 02:20:39,514 --> 02:20:41,766
  5624. and in the songs that we sing.
  5625.  
  5626. 1261
  5627. 02:20:44,853 --> 02:20:47,772
  5628. You know... That is why we sing.
  5629.  
  5630. 1262
  5631. 02:20:49,566 --> 02:20:52,527
  5632. We sing for our blood and for our people.
  5633.  
  5634. 1263
  5635. 02:20:54,404 --> 02:20:57,532
  5636. Because that's all we have
  5637. at the end of the day.
  5638.  
  5639. 1264
  5640. 02:21:01,703 --> 02:21:03,121
  5641. Each other, and...
  5642.  
  5643. 1265
  5644. 02:21:03,746 --> 02:21:06,207
  5645. maybe that's what I'm looking for
  5646. when I go down there.
  5647.  
  5648. 1266
  5649. 02:21:06,291 --> 02:21:08,042
  5650. I just want to commune...
  5651.  
  5652. 1267
  5653. 02:21:09,043 --> 02:21:10,628
  5654. with the old spirits,
  5655.  
  5656. 1268
  5657. 02:21:11,713 --> 02:21:13,465
  5658. stand in their presence,
  5659.  
  5660. 1269
  5661. 02:21:14,007 --> 02:21:15,925
  5662. feel their hands on me...
  5663.  
  5664. 1270
  5665. 02:21:23,516 --> 02:21:24,893
  5666. one more time.
  5667.  
  5668. 1271
  5669. 02:21:28,646 --> 02:21:32,233
  5670. Anyway, once again, I stood in the shadow
  5671. of my old church, you know?
  5672.  
  5673. 1272
  5674. 02:21:32,317 --> 02:21:34,611
  5675. You know what they say about Catholics?
  5676.  
  5677. 1273
  5678. 02:21:35,778 --> 02:21:38,865
  5679. Yeah, there's no getting out.
  5680.  
  5681. 1274
  5682. 02:21:38,948 --> 02:21:42,577
  5683. No, no. You know,
  5684. once they got you, they got you.
  5685.  
  5686. 1275
  5687. 02:21:42,660 --> 02:21:45,497
  5688. The bastards got you
  5689. when the gettin' was good.
  5690.  
  5691. 1276
  5692. 02:21:46,080 --> 02:21:49,042
  5693. They did their work hard
  5694. and they did it well.
  5695.  
  5696. 1277
  5697. 02:21:50,835 --> 02:21:54,839
  5698. 'Cause the words of a very strange
  5699. but all too familiar benediction
  5700.  
  5701. 1278
  5702. 02:21:54,923 --> 02:21:57,800
  5703. came back to me that evening.
  5704.  
  5705. 1279
  5706. 02:21:58,468 --> 02:22:01,095
  5707. And I want to tell you,
  5708. these were words that as a kid,
  5709.  
  5710. 1280
  5711. 02:22:01,179 --> 02:22:04,599
  5712. I mumbled these things,
  5713. I singsonged them,
  5714.  
  5715. 1281
  5716. 02:22:04,682 --> 02:22:08,895
  5717. I... chanted them,
  5718. bored out of my fucking mind
  5719.  
  5720. 1282
  5721. 02:22:08,978 --> 02:22:11,898
  5722. in an endless drone before class
  5723.  
  5724. 1283
  5725. 02:22:11,981 --> 02:22:15,568
  5726. every fucking day.
  5727.  
  5728. 1284
  5729. 02:22:15,652 --> 02:22:19,489
  5730. Every day, the green blazer,
  5731. the green tie, the green trousers,
  5732.  
  5733. 1285
  5734. 02:22:19,572 --> 02:22:23,993
  5735. the green socks of all
  5736. of St. Rose's unwilling disciples.
  5737.  
  5738. 1286
  5739. 02:22:28,081 --> 02:22:29,165
  5740. You know?
  5741.  
  5742. 1287
  5743. 02:22:29,666 --> 02:22:31,626
  5744. But for some damn reason
  5745.  
  5746. 1288
  5747. 02:22:32,669 --> 02:22:35,880
  5748. as I sat there on my street that night,
  5749.  
  5750. 1289
  5751. 02:22:37,465 --> 02:22:41,177
  5752. you know, mourning, mourning my old tree,
  5753.  
  5754. 1290
  5755. 02:22:42,136 --> 02:22:44,889
  5756. and once again surrounded by God,
  5757.  
  5758. 1291
  5759. 02:22:46,516 --> 02:22:49,894
  5760. those were the words that came back
  5761. to me and they flowed differently.
  5762.  
  5763. 1292
  5764. 02:22:52,939 --> 02:22:56,442
  5765. It was "Our Father, who art in Heaven,
  5766. hallowed be thy name,
  5767.  
  5768. 1293
  5769. 02:22:56,776 --> 02:22:58,319
  5770. thy kingdom come,
  5771.  
  5772. 1294
  5773. 02:22:59,612 --> 02:23:01,823
  5774. thy will be done on this Earth
  5775.  
  5776. 1295
  5777. 02:23:02,574 --> 02:23:04,033
  5778. as it is in Heaven.
  5779.  
  5780. 1296
  5781. 02:23:05,243 --> 02:23:07,161
  5782. Give us this day.
  5783.  
  5784. 1297
  5785. 02:23:07,996 --> 02:23:10,582
  5786. Just give us this day, and forgive us
  5787.  
  5788. 1298
  5789. 02:23:11,583 --> 02:23:14,127
  5790. our sins, our trespasses,
  5791.  
  5792. 1299
  5793. 02:23:14,210 --> 02:23:17,547
  5794. as we may forgive those
  5795. who trespass against us.
  5796.  
  5797. 1300
  5798. 02:23:17,964 --> 02:23:21,676
  5799. Lead us not into temptation
  5800. but deliver us from evil,
  5801.  
  5802. 1301
  5803. 02:23:22,093 --> 02:23:23,386
  5804. all of us,
  5805.  
  5806. 1302
  5807. 02:23:24,804 --> 02:23:26,806
  5808. forever and ever. Amen."
  5809.  
  5810. 1303
  5811. 02:23:35,315 --> 02:23:40,111
  5812. May God bless you, your family,
  5813. and all those that you love.
  5814.  
  5815. 1304
  5816. 02:23:40,737 --> 02:23:42,739
  5817. And thanks for coming out tonight.
  5818.  
  5819. 1305
  5820. 02:27:56,868 --> 02:27:59,871
  5821. Bruce!
  5822.  
  5823. 1306
  5824. 02:28:01,747 --> 02:28:02,623
  5825. Thank you.
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