since the beginning of faggotry, legends have spoke of a hero that would one day come forth and stop the faggotry for good. now, in a world where faggotry runs wild, one man will rise up as the last hope of a dying race, TO DANCE! his name is, the wang mangler. if you dont want your mang wangled, you better get the fuck out of wherever you are.

our story starts with a balloon animal floating around a daycare filled with detestable little subhuman shits callled "kids". these kids are beating up some old bitch when a swat team of rubber ducks smashes in through the windows and doors swinging in from rappel ropes with huge dicks spraying death out of them everywhere. we're talking 5 foot long dicks that  are like 1 and 1half foot thick just shooting out what looks like silver cum but its actually just millions of small bits of shrapnel. the kids were instantly reduced to puddles with chunks of flesh in them. the old bitch got the dicksmack in her face and she hit the ground so hard she was pancaked. the ballon animal which was a snake was resuced. they started to walk out of the zoo when an assload of jello rained down and started beating the dick out of the helpless rubber ducks. in a moment of desperation, the 8 ducks merged together to form super duckatron nigger slayer 3000. the jello got all pissed and formed a giant blob. the balloon snake turned into a penguin but just then samuel l jackson kicked that fucking pussy penguin bitch in the face like a motherfucking boss only to realize, it was a trap, the true penguin had left a squeaky toy decoy penguin in its place but then the blob hit the duck and the duck flew back but shot a ballistic dick missle at the blob which blue it to shit and the explosion angered samuel L jackson so he kicked all the children of ethiopia and somalia in their starving little stomachs. the sheer awesomeness of sam kicking them caused a radioactive explosion which ripped apart space and time sending earth and everything on it into a different dimension but the radioactivity caused everything to mutate while crossing dimensions which caused god to say "aww fuck this im done with this shit im getting too old. out of eternity i only get one bitches virginity, fuck you assholes" and he killed himself causing causing heaven and hell to be destroyed and everything in them too except for jesus who was blown out of god into the dimensional shift where he died as well from the radioactivity and he exploded sending his blood onto samuel l jackson. the dimensional shift coupled with the radioactive mutation and superpowered jesus blood, morphed him into the new god, although not as powerful  but he became a godlike being. it was like the highlander x 500. back on earth, everything was now afflicted with down syndrome. absolutely everything, including innanimate objects. they all melded into the earth which turned earth into a super down syndrome being of great power. the battle between super retardo earth and samuel god jackson was about to begin. you cant possibly come close to even attempting to imagine of dreaming of even thinking to try to fathom to going  anywhere near an idea of a universe where a god version of you could do anything that had even 1/1 billionth the awesomeness of this fight. thats how awesome this fight is. samuel god jackson said "do i look like a bitch?" and he kicked earth in the throat and it was over. the earth was without form, void. and samuel said "let there be motherfucking fuck everywhere in this fucking shit, bitch." and there was motherfucking fuck everywhere in that shit. and samuel was pleased. and that is the genesis. that is how earth came to exist again.

and so, the faggot fighter defeated the faggotry. and when he was done, he danced. so whenever there is trouble, on the night of a blue moon on friday the 13th when the planets are aligned and people stop being so stupid, you might just be saved, BY THE FAGGOT FIGHTER!