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Eng I Hate Kids (2019)

tpbolon Jan 31st, 2019 130 Never
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  1. 1
  2. 00:00:19,424 --> 00:00:24,424
  3. Subtitles by explosiveskull
  4.  
  5. 2
  6. 00:00:28,060 --> 00:00:28,892
  7. In the West,
  8.  
  9. 3
  10. 00:00:28,894 --> 00:00:30,659
  11. the Royals can
  12. clinch that division
  13.  
  14. 4
  15. 00:00:30,661 --> 00:00:32,095
  16. with a win over the Angels.
  17.  
  18. 5
  19. 00:00:32,097 --> 00:00:35,565
  20. Last night's one-nothing
  21. squeaker game, the Royals.
  22.  
  23. 6
  24. 00:00:35,567 --> 00:00:37,868
  25. And once you get
  26. a good rub on that loin,
  27.  
  28. 7
  29. 00:00:37,870 --> 00:00:39,035
  30. it's all about smokin' it.
  31.  
  32. 8
  33. 00:00:39,037 --> 00:00:41,170
  34. And how long do you
  35. normally smoke it?
  36.  
  37. 9
  38. 00:00:41,172 --> 00:00:44,007
  39. Well, I smoke it
  40. till it can't smoke no more.
  41.  
  42. 10
  43. 00:00:44,009 --> 00:00:44,974
  44. One, nothing lead.
  45.  
  46. 11
  47. 00:00:44,976 --> 00:00:46,977
  48. Good morning, Los Angeles
  49.  
  50. 12
  51. 00:00:46,979 --> 00:00:49,413
  52. and welcome to the
  53. Mystic Morning Show.
  54.  
  55. 13
  56. 00:00:49,415 --> 00:00:50,679
  57. As always on Saturday mornings,
  58.  
  59. 14
  60. 00:00:50,681 --> 00:00:53,916
  61. we have The Amazing
  62. Fabular in studios
  63.  
  64. 15
  65. 00:00:53,918 --> 00:00:56,886
  66. taking your calls and
  67. enlightening us all
  68.  
  69. 16
  70. 00:00:56,888 --> 00:00:58,989
  71. with his psychic powers.
  72.  
  73. 17
  74. 00:00:58,991 --> 00:01:02,024
  75. First up, we have
  76. Chaz from Mar Vista.
  77.  
  78. 18
  79. 00:01:02,026 --> 00:01:03,459
  80. Good morning, Chaz.
  81.  
  82. 19
  83. 00:01:03,461 --> 00:01:04,728
  84. Mornin'.
  85.  
  86. 20
  87. 00:01:04,730 --> 00:01:06,695
  88. What can
  89. Fabular do for you?
  90.  
  91. 21
  92. 00:01:06,697 --> 00:01:09,698
  93. Well, I'd just like to
  94. know where my dog Petey is.
  95.  
  96. 22
  97. 00:01:09,700 --> 00:01:14,706
  98. He went missin' about three
  99. weeks ago and I really miss him.
  100.  
  101. 23
  102. 00:01:17,443 --> 00:01:18,845
  103. I'm seeing a dog.
  104.  
  105. 24
  106. 00:01:20,545 --> 00:01:23,079
  107. A medium-sized dog.
  108.  
  109. 25
  110. 00:01:23,081 --> 00:01:25,781
  111. Oh, he was
  112. pretty big, actually.
  113.  
  114. 26
  115. 00:01:25,783 --> 00:01:29,554
  116. Yes, a medium large dog.
  117.  
  118. 27
  119. 00:01:32,458 --> 00:01:34,191
  120. Who's the B?
  121.  
  122. 28
  123. 00:01:36,128 --> 00:01:38,127
  124. I'm getting a strong sense of B.
  125.  
  126. 29
  127. 00:01:38,129 --> 00:01:39,028
  128. Who's the B?
  129.  
  130. 30
  131. 00:01:39,030 --> 00:01:39,995
  132. My wife!
  133.  
  134. 31
  135. 00:01:39,997 --> 00:01:41,498
  136. My wife's name is Barbara!
  137.  
  138. 32
  139. 00:01:41,500 --> 00:01:42,101
  140. Yes.
  141.  
  142. 33
  143. 00:01:43,501 --> 00:01:46,035
  144. She is upset that
  145. the dog is lost.
  146.  
  147. 34
  148. 00:01:46,037 --> 00:01:49,972
  149. Oh, no, she
  150. didn't like the dog at all.
  151.  
  152. 35
  153. 00:01:49,974 --> 00:01:51,775
  154. And by that, I
  155. mean she is upset
  156.  
  157. 36
  158. 00:01:51,777 --> 00:01:55,078
  159. with you that the dog is lost.
  160.  
  161. 37
  162. 00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:56,813
  163. Yep, she wants me
  164. to give up on him.
  165.  
  166. 38
  167. 00:01:56,815 --> 00:01:58,081
  168. But you mustn't.
  169.  
  170. 39
  171. 00:01:58,083 --> 00:02:00,183
  172. No, no, that's right.
  173.  
  174. 40
  175. 00:02:05,790 --> 00:02:08,023
  176. I've got great news
  177. for you, Charles.
  178.  
  179. 41
  180. 00:02:08,025 --> 00:02:09,158
  181. Chaz.
  182.  
  183. 42
  184. 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:12,027
  185. Charles, Petey is on his
  186. way home to you right now.
  187.  
  188. 43
  189. 00:02:12,029 --> 00:02:12,862
  190. Really?
  191.  
  192. 44
  193. 00:02:12,864 --> 00:02:13,796
  194. That's great.
  195.  
  196. 45
  197. 00:02:13,798 --> 00:02:16,932
  198. Thank you, thank you, Fabular!
  199.  
  200. 46
  201. 00:02:16,934 --> 00:02:19,201
  202. I don't create what I see.
  203.  
  204. 47
  205. 00:02:19,203 --> 00:02:21,003
  206. I am merely the messenger.
  207.  
  208. 48
  209. 00:02:21,005 --> 00:02:22,171
  210. I'm comin', Petey!
  211.  
  212. 49
  213. 00:02:22,173 --> 00:02:25,140
  214. Thanks for the call, Chaz,
  215. and good luck with Petey.
  216.  
  217. 50
  218. 00:02:25,142 --> 00:02:29,145
  219. Next up we have Tim Tai
  220. Choi from Monterey Park.
  221.  
  222. 51
  223. 00:02:29,147 --> 00:02:31,781
  224. What can Fabular do for you?
  225.  
  226. 52
  227. 00:02:31,783 --> 00:02:33,216
  228. Yeah, hello.
  229.  
  230. 53
  231. 00:02:33,218 --> 00:02:36,520
  232. I want to ask, Mr. Fabular.
  233.  
  234. 54
  235. 00:02:36,522 --> 00:02:41,126
  236. Where you get off telling my
  237. wife that I am cheating on her!
  238.  
  239. 55
  240. 00:02:41,626 --> 00:02:45,628
  241. The truth is liberating
  242. but also very painful.
  243.  
  244. 56
  245. 00:02:45,630 --> 00:02:46,263
  246. Liberating?
  247.  
  248. 57
  249. 00:02:46,265 --> 00:02:48,598
  250. What liberating?
  251.  
  252. 58
  253. 00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,567
  254. You ruined my wife,
  255.  
  256. 59
  257. 00:02:50,569 --> 00:02:52,269
  258. - you ruined my life...
  259. - Let it out.
  260.  
  261. 60
  262. 00:02:52,271 --> 00:02:54,069
  263. - Let the pain out.
  264. - And my marriage!
  265.  
  266. 61
  267. 00:02:54,071 --> 00:02:56,840
  268. All right, next
  269. up on line three,
  270.  
  271. 62
  272. 00:02:56,842 --> 00:03:01,711
  273. we have Josephine
  274. from Rancho Cucamonga!
  275.  
  276. 63
  277. 00:03:01,713 --> 00:03:04,717
  278. Good
  279. morning, Fabular.
  280.  
  281. 64
  282. 00:03:05,850 --> 00:03:07,283
  283. Fabular?
  284.  
  285. 65
  286. 00:03:07,285 --> 00:03:08,119
  287. Fabular?
  288.  
  289. 66
  290. 00:03:10,655 --> 00:03:12,123
  291. Hello?
  292.  
  293. 67
  294. 00:03:13,791 --> 00:03:15,057
  295. Maybe now might be a good time
  296.  
  297. 68
  298. 00:03:15,059 --> 00:03:17,159
  299. to take a short commercial break
  300.  
  301. 69
  302. 00:03:17,161 --> 00:03:21,900
  303. while Fabular
  304. takes a meditation.
  305.  
  306. 70
  307. 00:03:22,166 --> 00:03:24,099
  308. You okay, buddy?
  309.  
  310. 71
  311. 00:03:26,137 --> 00:03:26,973
  312. You okay?
  313.  
  314. 72
  315. 00:03:29,607 --> 00:03:30,242
  316. Mason.
  317.  
  318. 73
  319. 00:03:44,155 --> 00:03:45,588
  320. She's all yours, Jimmy.
  321.  
  322. 74
  323. 00:03:45,590 --> 00:03:46,855
  324. Sure thing, Mr. Pearson.
  325.  
  326. 75
  327. 00:03:46,857 --> 00:03:48,692
  328. And thanks for
  329. that tip last week.
  330.  
  331. 76
  332. 00:03:48,694 --> 00:03:50,794
  333. Did I give you a
  334. big tip last week?
  335.  
  336. 77
  337. 00:03:50,796 --> 00:03:52,162
  338. Oh, the advice.
  339.  
  340. 78
  341. 00:03:52,164 --> 00:03:53,028
  342. How'd that go?
  343.  
  344. 79
  345. 00:03:53,030 --> 00:03:55,365
  346. She broke up with me.
  347.  
  348. 80
  349. 00:03:55,367 --> 00:03:56,167
  350. I see.
  351.  
  352. 81
  353. 00:03:58,202 --> 00:03:59,304
  354. Keep the change.
  355.  
  356. 82
  357. 00:04:01,072 --> 00:04:01,706
  358. Thanks.
  359.  
  360. 83
  361. 00:04:05,309 --> 00:04:07,310
  362. Hey, it's the I Hate Kids guy!
  363.  
  364. 84
  365. 00:04:07,312 --> 00:04:08,547
  366. My god.
  367.  
  368. 85
  369. 00:04:09,247 --> 00:04:10,980
  370. Oh, yeah, yeah, that's me.
  371.  
  372. 86
  373. 00:04:10,982 --> 00:04:12,147
  374. This is so cool!
  375.  
  376. 87
  377. 00:04:12,149 --> 00:04:14,283
  378. I have been waiting
  379. here all day.
  380.  
  381. 88
  382. 00:04:14,285 --> 00:04:15,618
  383. Will you sign this for me?
  384.  
  385. 89
  386. 00:04:15,620 --> 00:04:17,386
  387. Yeah, of course.
  388.  
  389. 90
  390. 00:04:17,388 --> 00:04:19,855
  391. Man, you are a total genius.
  392.  
  393. 91
  394. 00:04:19,857 --> 00:04:21,091
  395. Oh!
  396.  
  397. 92
  398. 00:04:21,093 --> 00:04:24,026
  399. It's like you're
  400. inside my head.
  401.  
  402. 93
  403. 00:04:24,028 --> 00:04:26,629
  404. When I found out I was
  405. gonna have that one,
  406.  
  407. 94
  408. 00:04:26,631 --> 00:04:30,199
  409. I sat in my garage and tried
  410. to think of ways to end it all.
  411.  
  412. 95
  413. 00:04:30,201 --> 00:04:31,668
  414. Well, the book's really
  415. more tongue in cheek
  416.  
  417. 96
  418. 00:04:31,670 --> 00:04:33,269
  419. for those who choose
  420. not to have kids.
  421.  
  422. 97
  423. 00:04:33,271 --> 00:04:34,704
  424. Exactly!
  425.  
  426. 98
  427. 00:04:34,706 --> 00:04:36,338
  428. You totally blew my mind!
  429.  
  430. 99
  431. 00:04:36,340 --> 00:04:38,074
  432. I was like, if I
  433. ever meet this guy,
  434.  
  435. 100
  436. 00:04:38,076 --> 00:04:40,076
  437. we are gonna be best friends
  438.  
  439. 101
  440. 00:04:40,078 --> 00:04:44,014
  441. 'cause having kids is
  442. beyond life ruining
  443.  
  444. 102
  445. 00:04:44,016 --> 00:04:45,247
  446. and you get it, bro.
  447.  
  448. 103
  449. 00:04:45,249 --> 00:04:46,151
  450. You get it!
  451.  
  452. 104
  453. 00:04:47,319 --> 00:04:48,321
  454. Here ya go
  455.  
  456. 105
  457. 00:04:51,122 --> 00:04:52,422
  458. Oh, yeah!
  459.  
  460. 106
  461. 00:04:52,424 --> 00:04:53,259
  462. Wow.
  463.  
  464. 107
  465. 00:04:54,158 --> 00:04:55,124
  466. That's enough.
  467.  
  468. 108
  469. 00:04:55,126 --> 00:04:56,158
  470. Thanks, buddy, that's enough.
  471.  
  472. 109
  473. 00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:57,596
  474. Okay, I gotta.
  475.  
  476. 110
  477. 00:04:59,364 --> 00:05:00,396
  478. Great meeting you.
  479.  
  480. 111
  481. 00:05:00,398 --> 00:05:01,701
  482. Take care, kids.
  483.  
  484. 112
  485. 00:05:05,136 --> 00:05:06,435
  486. Hey!
  487.  
  488. 113
  489. 00:05:06,437 --> 00:05:07,403
  490. You know who that is?
  491.  
  492. 114
  493. 00:05:07,405 --> 00:05:08,607
  494. You know who that is?
  495.  
  496. 115
  497. 00:05:10,042 --> 00:05:12,809
  498. A little late,
  499. aren't we, Nick?
  500.  
  501. 116
  502. 00:05:12,811 --> 00:05:14,076
  503. Yeah, I'm a
  504. little late, Walter.
  505.  
  506. 117
  507. 00:05:14,078 --> 00:05:15,278
  508. I'm a little late.
  509.  
  510. 118
  511. 00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:17,881
  512. I'm gonna need a shot
  513. of liquid courage.
  514.  
  515. 119
  516. 00:05:17,883 --> 00:05:19,348
  517. What do you suggest?
  518.  
  519. 120
  520. 00:05:19,350 --> 00:05:21,785
  521. Well, if you were 15
  522. minutes late, I'd say wine
  523.  
  524. 121
  525. 00:05:21,787 --> 00:05:24,386
  526. but since you've crossed
  527. over the lateness equator,
  528.  
  529. 122
  530. 00:05:24,388 --> 00:05:26,923
  531. I think we're
  532. looking at bourbon.
  533.  
  534. 123
  535. 00:05:26,925 --> 00:05:29,225
  536. It's your professionalism
  537. I admire, Walter.
  538.  
  539. 124
  540. 00:05:29,227 --> 00:05:30,262
  541. Bourbon, it is.
  542.  
  543. 125
  544. 00:05:31,696 --> 00:05:32,331
  545. Perfect.
  546.  
  547. 126
  548. 00:05:33,732 --> 00:05:35,331
  549. You know, I finally
  550. finished your book
  551.  
  552. 127
  553. 00:05:35,333 --> 00:05:37,966
  554. and I caught you on Kelly
  555. and Ryan the other day.
  556.  
  557. 128
  558. 00:05:37,968 --> 00:05:39,302
  559. You're making quite a
  560. stir with this whole
  561.  
  562. 129
  563. 00:05:39,304 --> 00:05:41,271
  564. I Hate Kids thing.
  565.  
  566. 130
  567. 00:05:41,273 --> 00:05:42,439
  568. Mm-hmm.
  569.  
  570. 131
  571. 00:05:42,441 --> 00:05:44,440
  572. Kelly wasn't having any of it.
  573.  
  574. 132
  575. 00:05:44,442 --> 00:05:45,408
  576. No, she certainly was not.
  577.  
  578. 133
  579. 00:05:45,410 --> 00:05:47,046
  580. No, she wasn't.
  581.  
  582. 134
  583. 00:05:48,213 --> 00:05:49,144
  584. Luckily I have
  585. a woman back here
  586.  
  587. 135
  588. 00:05:49,146 --> 00:05:51,650
  589. who is more than okay with it.
  590.  
  591. 136
  592. 00:05:53,218 --> 00:05:55,354
  593. Better not keep her waiting.
  594.  
  595. 137
  596. 00:05:57,021 --> 00:05:58,089
  597. Wish me luck.
  598.  
  599. 138
  600. 00:06:00,258 --> 00:06:01,160
  601. Good luck.
  602.  
  603. 139
  604. 00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:07,262
  605. Sorry I'm late, folks.
  606.  
  607. 140
  608. 00:06:07,264 --> 00:06:09,932
  609. You know how these book
  610. tour press junkets go.
  611.  
  612. 141
  613. 00:06:09,934 --> 00:06:11,302
  614. Hey, Mom, hey, Dad.
  615.  
  616. 142
  617. 00:06:12,470 --> 00:06:13,970
  618. Hey, bro.
  619.  
  620. 143
  621. 00:06:13,972 --> 00:06:14,803
  622. Hi, Kelly.
  623.  
  624. 144
  625. 00:06:14,805 --> 00:06:15,439
  626. Oh.
  627.  
  628. 145
  629. 00:06:19,311 --> 00:06:20,242
  630. You're lucky I love you.
  631.  
  632. 146
  633. 00:06:20,244 --> 00:06:21,511
  634. You do know what will happen
  635.  
  636. 147
  637. 00:06:21,513 --> 00:06:22,812
  638. if you're late to the
  639. actual wedding, right?
  640.  
  641. 148
  642. 00:06:22,814 --> 00:06:24,012
  643. Of course.
  644.  
  645. 149
  646. 00:06:24,014 --> 00:06:27,516
  647. That's why I had my lawyer
  648. make you executor of the will.
  649.  
  650. 150
  651. 00:06:27,518 --> 00:06:29,886
  652. Well, I know that we
  653. just wanna thank you all
  654.  
  655. 151
  656. 00:06:29,888 --> 00:06:32,756
  657. for being here with us
  658. on this special occasion.
  659.  
  660. 152
  661. 00:06:32,758 --> 00:06:37,363
  662. I wanna make a toast to the
  663. bravest woman I have ever met.
  664.  
  665. 153
  666. 00:06:38,429 --> 00:06:40,129
  667. Anyone who can get hitched
  668.  
  669. 154
  670. 00:06:40,131 --> 00:06:44,434
  671. to such a humongous bag of hot
  672. air is truly one of a kind.
  673.  
  674. 155
  675. 00:06:46,470 --> 00:06:48,437
  676. So here's to Sydney's mom.
  677.  
  678. 156
  679. 00:06:51,910 --> 00:06:54,076
  680. Sorry, Phil, I couldn't resist.
  681.  
  682. 157
  683. 00:06:54,078 --> 00:06:55,545
  684. Jeez!
  685.  
  686. 158
  687. 00:06:55,547 --> 00:06:56,646
  688. Reverend!
  689.  
  690. 159
  691. 00:06:56,648 --> 00:06:58,514
  692. And Nick does not consider
  693. the evening a success
  694.  
  695. 160
  696. 00:06:58,516 --> 00:07:01,985
  697. unless bourbon comes out of
  698. Reverend McGooley's nose.
  699.  
  700. 161
  701. 00:07:01,987 --> 00:07:04,254
  702. Sorry, reverend,
  703. it's the good stuff.
  704.  
  705. 162
  706. 00:07:04,256 --> 00:07:06,221
  707. We're off to a great start.
  708.  
  709. 163
  710. 00:07:06,223 --> 00:07:07,557
  711. Here we go, folks.
  712.  
  713. 164
  714. 00:07:07,559 --> 00:07:08,891
  715. - Hang in there.
  716. - Are you okay?
  717.  
  718. 165
  719. 00:07:08,893 --> 00:07:10,459
  720. All right.
  721.  
  722. 166
  723. 00:07:10,461 --> 00:07:11,394
  724. He's good.
  725.  
  726. 167
  727. 00:07:14,266 --> 00:07:17,266
  728. Okay, my turn.
  729.  
  730. 168
  731. 00:07:17,268 --> 00:07:24,275
  732. When I first met Nick last year,
  733. I was moderately impressed.
  734.  
  735. 169
  736. 00:07:25,477 --> 00:07:28,478
  737. He is clever, he is
  738. devilishly handsome
  739.  
  740. 170
  741. 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:30,280
  742. and handsomely devilish.
  743.  
  744. 171
  745. 00:07:30,282 --> 00:07:33,516
  746. He keeps me laughing and
  747. he is smart enough to know
  748.  
  749. 172
  750. 00:07:33,518 --> 00:07:36,019
  751. when he has lost an argument.
  752.  
  753. 173
  754. 00:07:36,021 --> 00:07:39,055
  755. But I knew that he was
  756. the man of my dreams
  757.  
  758. 174
  759. 00:07:39,057 --> 00:07:43,158
  760. when he spoke these three
  761. precious words to me.
  762.  
  763. 175
  764. 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:44,593
  765. I hate kids.
  766.  
  767. 176
  768. 00:07:48,133 --> 00:07:49,064
  769. What?
  770.  
  771. 177
  772. 00:07:49,066 --> 00:07:52,037
  773. Well, we're having a baby, so.
  774.  
  775. 178
  776. 00:07:53,037 --> 00:07:56,271
  777. And since my brave and
  778. very beautiful sister Kelly
  779.  
  780. 179
  781. 00:07:56,273 --> 00:07:59,108
  782. is handling the creation
  783. of grandchildren,
  784.  
  785. 180
  786. 00:07:59,110 --> 00:08:00,944
  787. it frees Nick and I up to pursue
  788.  
  789. 181
  790. 00:08:00,946 --> 00:08:03,612
  791. a much less complicated
  792. life together.
  793.  
  794. 182
  795. 00:08:03,614 --> 00:08:06,249
  796. Besides, over the years I've
  797. managed to kill a hamster,
  798.  
  799. 183
  800. 00:08:06,251 --> 00:08:09,519
  801. a gerbil, two
  802. turtles and a horse.
  803.  
  804. 184
  805. 00:08:09,521 --> 00:08:10,886
  806. A horse?
  807.  
  808. 185
  809. 00:08:10,888 --> 00:08:12,422
  810. That was a joke, the horse.
  811.  
  812. 186
  813. 00:08:12,424 --> 00:08:14,260
  814. I didn't kill a horse.
  815.  
  816. 187
  817. 00:08:15,292 --> 00:08:17,994
  818. But my record as a care
  819. provider is less than stellar
  820.  
  821. 188
  822. 00:08:17,996 --> 00:08:21,531
  823. so here's to a
  824. lifetime of adventures.
  825.  
  826. 189
  827. 00:08:21,533 --> 00:08:23,233
  828. Just the two of us.
  829.  
  830. 190
  831. 00:08:23,235 --> 00:08:24,600
  832. Cheers!
  833.  
  834. 191
  835. 00:08:24,602 --> 00:08:25,437
  836. Cheers!
  837.  
  838. 192
  839. 00:08:31,910 --> 00:08:33,545
  840. Can I help you, sir?
  841.  
  842. 193
  843. 00:08:35,146 --> 00:08:37,046
  844. I think I need a drink.
  845.  
  846. 194
  847. 00:08:37,048 --> 00:08:38,183
  848. What'll it be?
  849.  
  850. 195
  851. 00:08:39,583 --> 00:08:43,620
  852. Something sweet with bubbles
  853. and a splash of grenadine.
  854.  
  855. 196
  856. 00:08:43,622 --> 00:08:45,187
  857. Sounds serious.
  858.  
  859. 197
  860. 00:08:45,189 --> 00:08:47,356
  861. It's very serious.
  862.  
  863. 198
  864. 00:08:47,358 --> 00:08:49,057
  865. Do you wanna talk about it?
  866.  
  867. 199
  868. 00:08:49,059 --> 00:08:51,326
  869. It's family stuff.
  870.  
  871. 200
  872. 00:08:51,328 --> 00:08:52,397
  873. Here ya go.
  874.  
  875. 201
  876. 00:09:03,375 --> 00:09:04,673
  877. Thanks.
  878.  
  879. 202
  880. 00:09:04,675 --> 00:09:06,542
  881. It's okay.
  882.  
  883. 203
  884. 00:09:06,544 --> 00:09:07,442
  885. It's on the house.
  886.  
  887. 204
  888. 00:09:07,444 --> 00:09:09,077
  889. Thanks.
  890.  
  891. 205
  892. 00:09:09,079 --> 00:09:11,214
  893. Do you know where
  894. the Pearson party is?
  895.  
  896. 206
  897. 00:09:11,216 --> 00:09:12,447
  898. Yeah, it's down the hall,
  899.  
  900. 207
  901. 00:09:12,449 --> 00:09:15,220
  902. first set of double
  903. doors on the left.
  904.  
  905. 208
  906. 00:09:16,655 --> 00:09:18,089
  907. Wish me luck.
  908.  
  909. 209
  910. 00:09:19,491 --> 00:09:20,492
  911. Good luck.
  912.  
  913. 210
  914. 00:09:21,693 --> 00:09:24,994
  915. Okay, I will
  916. start the ceremony
  917.  
  918. 211
  919. 00:09:24,996 --> 00:09:27,429
  920. with a little introduction like,
  921.  
  922. 212
  923. 00:09:27,431 --> 00:09:29,365
  924. dearly beloved, we are
  925. gathered here today
  926.  
  927. 213
  928. 00:09:29,367 --> 00:09:34,202
  929. in the presence of God to
  930. join Nicholas Buchanan Pearson
  931.  
  932. 214
  933. 00:09:34,204 --> 00:09:35,138
  934. That's me.
  935.  
  936. 215
  937. 00:09:35,140 --> 00:09:37,673
  938. and Sydney Dell Bartlett
  939. in holy matrimony.
  940.  
  941. 216
  942. 00:09:37,675 --> 00:09:39,374
  943. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
  944.  
  945. 217
  946. 00:09:39,376 --> 00:09:43,078
  947. Di da di da, et cetera,
  948. et cetera, et cetera.
  949.  
  950. 218
  951. 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,682
  952. And then I'm required
  953. by the collar to ask
  954.  
  955. 219
  956. 00:09:45,684 --> 00:09:49,519
  957. be there anyone here today
  958. who knows of any reason
  959.  
  960. 220
  961. 00:09:49,521 --> 00:09:53,623
  962. why these two should not be
  963. joined in holy matrimony?
  964.  
  965. 221
  966. 00:09:53,625 --> 00:09:57,897
  967. Speak now or forever
  968. hold your peace.
  969.  
  970. 222
  971. 00:09:58,630 --> 00:09:59,631
  972. Excuse me.
  973.  
  974. 223
  975. 00:10:01,165 --> 00:10:02,664
  976. Can I help you, young man?
  977.  
  978. 224
  979. 00:10:02,666 --> 00:10:03,666
  980. I do.
  981.  
  982. 225
  983. 00:10:03,668 --> 00:10:05,033
  984. You do what?
  985.  
  986. 226
  987. 00:10:06,972 --> 00:10:07,703
  988. Well, I mean, this seemed like
  989.  
  990. 227
  991. 00:10:07,705 --> 00:10:09,572
  992. the perfect moment to say it
  993.  
  994. 228
  995. 00:10:09,574 --> 00:10:12,475
  996. since you asked the
  997. question, right?
  998.  
  999. 229
  1000. 00:10:12,477 --> 00:10:13,408
  1001. What's goin' on, buddy?
  1002.  
  1003. 230
  1004. 00:10:13,410 --> 00:10:16,012
  1005. What are you talkin' about?
  1006.  
  1007. 231
  1008. 00:10:16,014 --> 00:10:17,583
  1009. You're my father.
  1010.  
  1011. 232
  1012. 00:10:19,550 --> 00:10:22,085
  1013. It was just one night.
  1014.  
  1015. 233
  1016. 00:10:22,087 --> 00:10:23,119
  1017. Not you, sir.
  1018.  
  1019. 234
  1020. 00:10:23,121 --> 00:10:24,957
  1021. No, him.
  1022.  
  1023. 235
  1024. 00:10:26,690 --> 00:10:28,390
  1025. He's my father.
  1026.  
  1027. 236
  1028. 00:10:28,392 --> 00:10:30,360
  1029. I'm your dad?
  1030.  
  1031. 237
  1032. 00:10:30,362 --> 00:10:33,062
  1033. Yes, you're my father.
  1034.  
  1035. 238
  1036. 00:10:33,064 --> 00:10:34,934
  1037. Who is this, Nick?
  1038.  
  1039. 239
  1040. 00:10:36,001 --> 00:10:37,133
  1041. Who is this?
  1042.  
  1043. 240
  1044. 00:10:37,135 --> 00:10:38,134
  1045. Oh, ha, ha, ha.
  1046.  
  1047. 241
  1048. 00:10:38,136 --> 00:10:41,004
  1049. Very funny, hilarious!
  1050.  
  1051. 242
  1052. 00:10:41,006 --> 00:10:44,773
  1053. Whose inappropriate little
  1054. caper is this, Larry?
  1055.  
  1056. 243
  1057. 00:10:44,775 --> 00:10:45,741
  1058. Brian, you do this?
  1059.  
  1060. 244
  1061. 00:10:45,743 --> 00:10:47,342
  1062. No.
  1063.  
  1064. 245
  1065. 00:10:47,344 --> 00:10:48,344
  1066. Simon?
  1067.  
  1068. 246
  1069. 00:10:48,346 --> 00:10:49,578
  1070. - No.
  1071. - Not me.
  1072.  
  1073. 247
  1074. 00:10:49,580 --> 00:10:51,179
  1075. Was it any of
  1076. these guys 'cause...
  1077.  
  1078. 248
  1079. 00:10:51,181 --> 00:10:53,682
  1080. I don't know who
  1081. these people are.
  1082.  
  1083. 249
  1084. 00:10:53,684 --> 00:10:55,751
  1085. Ooh, is that cake?
  1086.  
  1087. 250
  1088. 00:10:55,753 --> 00:10:57,253
  1089. I love cake.
  1090.  
  1091. 251
  1092. 00:10:57,255 --> 00:10:59,054
  1093. All right, son.
  1094.  
  1095. 252
  1096. 00:10:59,056 --> 00:11:01,523
  1097. You've had your little joke.
  1098.  
  1099. 253
  1100. 00:11:01,525 --> 00:11:03,359
  1101. Now just move along.
  1102.  
  1103. 254
  1104. 00:11:03,361 --> 00:11:05,394
  1105. It's not a joke, ma'am.
  1106.  
  1107. 255
  1108. 00:11:05,396 --> 00:11:06,696
  1109. He's my dad.
  1110.  
  1111. 256
  1112. 00:11:06,698 --> 00:11:09,499
  1113. All right, well,
  1114. in typical fashion,
  1115.  
  1116. 257
  1117. 00:11:09,501 --> 00:11:11,701
  1118. my ingenious friends
  1119. at The Jonathan Club
  1120.  
  1121. 258
  1122. 00:11:11,703 --> 00:11:14,537
  1123. just don't know when
  1124. to end the sketch.
  1125.  
  1126. 259
  1127. 00:11:14,539 --> 00:11:15,738
  1128. I'm just gonna take a moment
  1129.  
  1130. 260
  1131. 00:11:15,740 --> 00:11:19,542
  1132. to tip this little thespian
  1133. for his stirring performance
  1134.  
  1135. 261
  1136. 00:11:19,544 --> 00:11:23,314
  1137. and I'll be back before
  1138. you finish your cake.
  1139.  
  1140. 262
  1141. 00:11:24,681 --> 00:11:27,182
  1142. All right, I'm afraid I'm
  1143. unaware of the protocols
  1144.  
  1145. 263
  1146. 00:11:27,184 --> 00:11:29,818
  1147. when it comes to gratuities
  1148. for embarrassment
  1149.  
  1150. 264
  1151. 00:11:29,820 --> 00:11:31,155
  1152. so bear with me.
  1153.  
  1154. 265
  1155. 00:11:32,424 --> 00:11:34,190
  1156. 50 gonna do it?
  1157.  
  1158. 266
  1159. 00:11:34,192 --> 00:11:35,224
  1160. What are you talking about?
  1161.  
  1162. 267
  1163. 00:11:35,226 --> 00:11:36,392
  1164. I am talking about your tip.
  1165.  
  1166. 268
  1167. 00:11:36,394 --> 00:11:37,726
  1168. Just take it and
  1169. tell whoever sent you
  1170.  
  1171. 269
  1172. 00:11:37,728 --> 00:11:39,662
  1173. that you did an
  1174. absolutely smashing job
  1175.  
  1176. 270
  1177. 00:11:39,664 --> 00:11:41,197
  1178. of disrupting my evening.
  1179.  
  1180. 271
  1181. 00:11:41,199 --> 00:11:42,465
  1182. I don't want your money.
  1183.  
  1184. 272
  1185. 00:11:42,467 --> 00:11:43,432
  1186. Look, kid, take it.
  1187.  
  1188. 273
  1189. 00:11:43,434 --> 00:11:45,067
  1190. I'm not usually this generous.
  1191.  
  1192. 274
  1193. 00:11:45,069 --> 00:11:48,203
  1194. Listen, I need
  1195. you to find my mom.
  1196.  
  1197. 275
  1198. 00:11:48,205 --> 00:11:49,471
  1199. Buddy, I don't know you
  1200.  
  1201. 276
  1202. 00:11:49,473 --> 00:11:50,673
  1203. so I wouldn't know
  1204. who your mother is.
  1205.  
  1206. 277
  1207. 00:11:50,675 --> 00:11:53,809
  1208. Well, you must have known
  1209. her, at least a little bit.
  1210.  
  1211. 278
  1212. 00:11:53,811 --> 00:11:54,644
  1213. Why?
  1214.  
  1215. 279
  1216. 00:11:54,646 --> 00:11:55,677
  1217. Because you're my dad.
  1218.  
  1219. 280
  1220. 00:11:55,679 --> 00:11:56,578
  1221. Look, stop saying that.
  1222.  
  1223. 281
  1224. 00:11:56,580 --> 00:11:57,312
  1225. I'm not your dad.
  1226.  
  1227. 282
  1228. 00:11:57,314 --> 00:11:57,980
  1229. - But you are.
  1230. - No, I'm not.
  1231.  
  1232. 283
  1233. 00:11:57,982 --> 00:11:58,847
  1234. - Yes, you are.
  1235. - I'm not!
  1236.  
  1237. 284
  1238. 00:11:58,849 --> 00:12:00,649
  1239. - Yes, you are!
  1240. - Stop contradicting me.
  1241.  
  1242. 285
  1243. 00:12:00,651 --> 00:12:01,451
  1244. See?
  1245.  
  1246. 286
  1247. 00:12:01,453 --> 00:12:02,284
  1248. You sound like a father.
  1249.  
  1250. 287
  1251. 00:12:02,286 --> 00:12:03,251
  1252. I do not.
  1253.  
  1254. 288
  1255. 00:12:03,253 --> 00:12:03,852
  1256. - Yes, you do.
  1257. - I do not.
  1258.  
  1259. 289
  1260. 00:12:03,854 --> 00:12:05,120
  1261. But really, you do.
  1262.  
  1263. 290
  1264. 00:12:05,122 --> 00:12:06,721
  1265. Look, this is ridiculous.
  1266.  
  1267. 291
  1268. 00:12:06,723 --> 00:12:08,124
  1269. No, thank you, we're all set.
  1270.  
  1271. 292
  1272. 00:12:08,126 --> 00:12:08,857
  1273. What does he want?
  1274.  
  1275. 293
  1276. 00:12:08,859 --> 00:12:09,792
  1277. He wants to give us a towel.
  1278.  
  1279. 294
  1280. 00:12:09,794 --> 00:12:10,625
  1281. Why?
  1282.  
  1283. 295
  1284. 00:12:10,627 --> 00:12:11,860
  1285. 'Cause it's his job.
  1286.  
  1287. 296
  1288. 00:12:11,862 --> 00:12:12,562
  1289. Well, why don't you take a
  1290. towel and let him do his job?
  1291.  
  1292. 297
  1293. 00:12:12,564 --> 00:12:13,361
  1294. 'Cause I don't want a towel!
  1295.  
  1296. 298
  1297. 00:12:13,363 --> 00:12:14,163
  1298. I wanna get rid of
  1299. you and get back
  1300.  
  1301. 299
  1302. 00:12:14,165 --> 00:12:15,798
  1303. - to my wedding rehearsal.
  1304. - Thanks.
  1305.  
  1306. 300
  1307. 00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:17,166
  1308. Can I keep this?
  1309.  
  1310. 301
  1311. 00:12:17,168 --> 00:12:17,866
  1312. No, yes, whatever,
  1313. I don't care.
  1314.  
  1315. 302
  1316. 00:12:17,868 --> 00:12:19,268
  1317. I don't care at all.
  1318.  
  1319. 303
  1320. 00:12:19,270 --> 00:12:20,870
  1321. Just take the money,
  1322. kid, and get outta here.
  1323.  
  1324. 304
  1325. 00:12:20,872 --> 00:12:22,404
  1326. Nick?
  1327.  
  1328. 305
  1329. 00:12:22,406 --> 00:12:24,273
  1330. What's going on?
  1331.  
  1332. 306
  1333. 00:12:24,275 --> 00:12:25,107
  1334. Is she supposed to be in here?
  1335.  
  1336. 307
  1337. 00:12:25,109 --> 00:12:26,308
  1338. No.
  1339.  
  1340. 308
  1341. 00:12:26,310 --> 00:12:27,243
  1342. Don't worry, Syd,
  1343. I'm handling it.
  1344.  
  1345. 309
  1346. 00:12:27,245 --> 00:12:28,711
  1347. Everyone's waiting for you.
  1348.  
  1349. 310
  1350. 00:12:28,713 --> 00:12:29,846
  1351. Did you know this man
  1352. gives free towels to people?
  1353.  
  1354. 311
  1355. 00:12:29,848 --> 00:12:31,880
  1356. Oh, hi, thank you.
  1357.  
  1358. 312
  1359. 00:12:31,882 --> 00:12:33,648
  1360. Nick, do you have a...?
  1361.  
  1362. 313
  1363. 00:12:33,650 --> 00:12:34,749
  1364. Yes, here, thank you so much.
  1365.  
  1366. 314
  1367. 00:12:34,751 --> 00:12:36,751
  1368. - Gotta go, coming through.
  1369. - That's for the towels.
  1370.  
  1371. 315
  1372. 00:12:36,753 --> 00:12:39,221
  1373. Look, Syd, I'll be
  1374. right there, okay?
  1375.  
  1376. 316
  1377. 00:12:39,223 --> 00:12:40,456
  1378. I'm just wrapping things up
  1379.  
  1380. 317
  1381. 00:12:40,458 --> 00:12:41,657
  1382. with our wonderful
  1383. performer there.
  1384.  
  1385. 318
  1386. 00:12:41,659 --> 00:12:42,825
  1387. Okay, please hurry.
  1388.  
  1389. 319
  1390. 00:12:42,827 --> 00:12:43,893
  1391. Yeah, two minutes, love.
  1392.  
  1393. 320
  1394. 00:12:43,895 --> 00:12:44,730
  1395. I promise.
  1396.  
  1397. 321
  1398. 00:12:47,131 --> 00:12:48,663
  1399. So what's the plan, Dad?
  1400.  
  1401. 322
  1402. 00:12:48,665 --> 00:12:49,499
  1403. Stop calling me
  1404. that, all right?
  1405.  
  1406. 323
  1407. 00:12:49,501 --> 00:12:50,600
  1408. I'm not your dad.
  1409.  
  1410. 324
  1411. 00:12:50,602 --> 00:12:52,869
  1412. Where'd you get that stupid
  1413. idea from anyway, huh?
  1414.  
  1415. 325
  1416. 00:12:52,871 --> 00:12:54,637
  1417. From him.
  1418.  
  1419. 326
  1420. 00:12:54,639 --> 00:12:55,741
  1421. How do you do?
  1422.  
  1423. 327
  1424. 00:12:57,842 --> 00:13:00,375
  1425. I am The Amazing Fabular.
  1426.  
  1427. 328
  1428. 00:13:00,377 --> 00:13:02,144
  1429. What is that, a service rat?
  1430.  
  1431. 329
  1432. 00:13:02,146 --> 00:13:03,812
  1433. Mr. Sparkles is a dog.
  1434.  
  1435. 330
  1436. 00:13:03,814 --> 00:13:05,447
  1437. He is my portal to
  1438. other dimensions
  1439.  
  1440. 331
  1441. 00:13:05,449 --> 00:13:06,749
  1442. of sight and sound
  1443. that provide me
  1444.  
  1445. 332
  1446. 00:13:06,751 --> 00:13:09,284
  1447. with the gift of clairvoyance.
  1448.  
  1449. 333
  1450. 00:13:09,286 --> 00:13:11,921
  1451. Oh, you're a fortune teller?
  1452.  
  1453. 334
  1454. 00:13:12,756 --> 00:13:15,557
  1455. I am a world-class
  1456. psychic, sir.
  1457.  
  1458. 335
  1459. 00:13:15,559 --> 00:13:17,426
  1460. I have clients among persons
  1461.  
  1462. 336
  1463. 00:13:17,428 --> 00:13:19,828
  1464. of the most well-known
  1465. celebrity and high society.
  1466.  
  1467. 337
  1468. 00:13:19,830 --> 00:13:22,831
  1469. Yeah, and here you
  1470. are in the men's room.
  1471.  
  1472. 338
  1473. 00:13:22,833 --> 00:13:24,866
  1474. Hmm, as unaccustomed as I am
  1475.  
  1476. 339
  1477. 00:13:24,868 --> 00:13:26,701
  1478. to having to avouch
  1479. my credentials
  1480.  
  1481. 340
  1482. 00:13:26,703 --> 00:13:28,504
  1483. within earshot of
  1484. a public commode,
  1485.  
  1486. 341
  1487. 00:13:28,506 --> 00:13:30,907
  1488. I can tell you that unequivocally,
  1489. this boy tells the truth.
  1490.  
  1491. 342
  1492. 00:13:30,909 --> 00:13:32,508
  1493. You are his father.
  1494.  
  1495. 343
  1496. 00:13:32,510 --> 00:13:33,341
  1497. Oh, yeah?
  1498.  
  1499. 344
  1500. 00:13:33,343 --> 00:13:35,811
  1501. What makes you so sure?
  1502.  
  1503. 345
  1504. 00:13:35,813 --> 00:13:38,313
  1505. Mr. Sparkles told me.
  1506.  
  1507. 346
  1508. 00:13:40,184 --> 00:13:42,618
  1509. Oh, excuse me, let
  1510. me get this straight.
  1511.  
  1512. 347
  1513. 00:13:42,620 --> 00:13:44,486
  1514. You want me to believe
  1515. that this man-child here
  1516.  
  1517. 348
  1518. 00:13:44,488 --> 00:13:45,855
  1519. is the fruit of my loins
  1520.  
  1521. 349
  1522. 00:13:45,857 --> 00:13:49,392
  1523. because you received
  1524. a cosmic message
  1525.  
  1526. 350
  1527. 00:13:49,394 --> 00:13:50,625
  1528. through the strange
  1529. little rodent
  1530.  
  1531. 351
  1532. 00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:51,726
  1533. that's tucked in your armpit?
  1534.  
  1535. 352
  1536. 00:13:51,728 --> 00:13:52,727
  1537. Is that it?
  1538.  
  1539. 353
  1540. 00:13:52,729 --> 00:13:54,429
  1541. Precisely, ruff!
  1542.  
  1543. 354
  1544. 00:13:54,431 --> 00:13:55,965
  1545. Excuse me, I'm due
  1546. back on planet Earth.
  1547.  
  1548. 355
  1549. 00:13:55,967 --> 00:14:00,769
  1550. Uh-uh, perhaps, these DNA
  1551. results will convince you.
  1552.  
  1553. 356
  1554. 00:14:00,771 --> 00:14:01,672
  1555. DNA what?
  1556.  
  1557. 357
  1558. 00:14:08,846 --> 00:14:10,712
  1559. Nicholas, Nicholas!
  1560.  
  1561. 358
  1562. 00:14:10,714 --> 00:14:13,749
  1563. What is this crap about
  1564. me gettin' cut off, huh?
  1565.  
  1566. 359
  1567. 00:14:13,751 --> 00:14:15,585
  1568. It's humiliating.
  1569.  
  1570. 360
  1571. 00:14:15,587 --> 00:14:17,852
  1572. Nicholas, what
  1573. has gotten into you?
  1574.  
  1575. 361
  1576. 00:14:17,854 --> 00:14:19,688
  1577. I mean, what in the
  1578. world is going on?
  1579.  
  1580. 362
  1581. 00:14:19,690 --> 00:14:21,490
  1582. I am very disappointed in you.
  1583.  
  1584. 363
  1585. 00:14:21,492 --> 00:14:22,658
  1586. Tell Syd
  1587.  
  1588. 364
  1589. 00:14:22,660 --> 00:14:23,525
  1590. - that I will be right in.
  1591. - And by the way,
  1592.  
  1593. 365
  1594. 00:14:23,527 --> 00:14:25,794
  1595. who the, is that kid?
  1596.  
  1597. 366
  1598. 00:14:25,796 --> 00:14:27,395
  1599. - I will be right back.
  1600. - Money into this...
  1601.  
  1602. 367
  1603. 00:14:27,397 --> 00:14:28,397
  1604. Take the reverend with you.
  1605.  
  1606. 368
  1607. 00:14:28,399 --> 00:14:30,869
  1608. Get him a drink,
  1609. get me one, too.
  1610.  
  1611. 369
  1612. 00:14:32,536 --> 00:14:34,971
  1613. All right, I don't know
  1614. what to make of this.
  1615.  
  1616. 370
  1617. 00:14:34,973 --> 00:14:38,874
  1618. And you've kind of caught me
  1619. at an awkward moment so just
  1620.  
  1621. 371
  1622. 00:14:38,876 --> 00:14:40,909
  1623. meet me at this address
  1624. at 11 p.m. tonight.
  1625.  
  1626. 372
  1627. 00:14:40,911 --> 00:14:42,278
  1628. Can you do that?
  1629.  
  1630. 373
  1631. 00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:43,312
  1632. Sure.
  1633.  
  1634. 374
  1635. 00:14:43,314 --> 00:14:44,779
  1636. All right.
  1637.  
  1638. 375
  1639. 00:14:44,781 --> 00:14:46,014
  1640. Why don't you take that towel
  1641. and get rid of that thing
  1642.  
  1643. 376
  1644. 00:14:46,016 --> 00:14:48,753
  1645. that's hanging from
  1646. your nostril, kid?
  1647.  
  1648. 377
  1649. 00:14:50,454 --> 00:14:51,622
  1650. Thanks, Dad.
  1651.  
  1652. 378
  1653. 00:14:53,891 --> 00:14:55,394
  1654. See you tonight.
  1655.  
  1656. 379
  1657. 00:14:57,261 --> 00:14:58,927
  1658. I see good things
  1659. in your future.
  1660.  
  1661. 380
  1662. 00:14:58,929 --> 00:15:00,929
  1663. Bye, Mom, bye, Dad.
  1664.  
  1665. 381
  1666. 00:15:00,931 --> 00:15:03,666
  1667. - Goodbye, cake eater.
  1668. - I love you so, so much.
  1669.  
  1670. 382
  1671. 00:15:03,668 --> 00:15:04,966
  1672. Thank you for everything.
  1673.  
  1674. 383
  1675. 00:15:04,968 --> 00:15:06,001
  1676. I'll see you Sunday
  1677.  
  1678. 384
  1679. 00:15:06,003 --> 00:15:07,370
  1680. - at the wedding.
  1681. - Love you, honey.
  1682.  
  1683. 385
  1684. 00:15:07,372 --> 00:15:09,304
  1685. - I love you, Dad.
  1686. - Bye, dear.
  1687.  
  1688. 386
  1689. 00:15:09,306 --> 00:15:10,605
  1690. Oh, bye, bye, guys.
  1691.  
  1692. 387
  1693. 00:15:10,607 --> 00:15:11,440
  1694. Hey.
  1695.  
  1696. 388
  1697. 00:15:11,442 --> 00:15:12,374
  1698. Sorry.
  1699.  
  1700. 389
  1701. 00:15:12,376 --> 00:15:13,408
  1702. What was that all about?
  1703.  
  1704. 390
  1705. 00:15:13,410 --> 00:15:14,342
  1706. What?
  1707.  
  1708. 391
  1709. 00:15:14,344 --> 00:15:15,977
  1710. The whole kid prank thing?
  1711.  
  1712. 392
  1713. 00:15:15,979 --> 00:15:17,013
  1714. Who would do that?
  1715.  
  1716. 393
  1717. 00:15:17,015 --> 00:15:17,913
  1718. That's not cool.
  1719.  
  1720. 394
  1721. 00:15:17,915 --> 00:15:19,548
  1722. I know, it was so
  1723. tasteless, right?
  1724.  
  1725. 395
  1726. 00:15:19,550 --> 00:15:21,049
  1727. And that kid wouldn't
  1728. tell me who hired him.
  1729.  
  1730. 396
  1731. 00:15:21,051 --> 00:15:23,318
  1732. He must have been
  1733. paid a lot of money.
  1734.  
  1735. 397
  1736. 00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:23,952
  1737. He's a good actor.
  1738.  
  1739. 398
  1740. 00:15:23,954 --> 00:15:25,388
  1741. Yeah.
  1742.  
  1743. 399
  1744. 00:15:25,390 --> 00:15:27,322
  1745. Anyway, it's an
  1746. awkward memory now.
  1747.  
  1748. 400
  1749. 00:15:27,324 --> 00:15:29,357
  1750. Hey, this book publicity
  1751. has just got me exhausted.
  1752.  
  1753. 401
  1754. 00:15:29,359 --> 00:15:30,993
  1755. My bed is calling me.
  1756.  
  1757. 402
  1758. 00:15:30,995 --> 00:15:32,628
  1759. Oh, yeah, honey, I understand.
  1760.  
  1761. 403
  1762. 00:15:32,630 --> 00:15:33,663
  1763. Why don't you go get some sleep?
  1764.  
  1765. 404
  1766. 00:15:33,665 --> 00:15:34,596
  1767. - Okay.
  1768. - I'm gonna stay
  1769.  
  1770. 405
  1771. 00:15:34,598 --> 00:15:36,065
  1772. and have a drink with Kelly.
  1773.  
  1774. 406
  1775. 00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:37,966
  1776. I'm gonna drink,
  1777. she's gonna eat cake.
  1778.  
  1779. 407
  1780. 00:15:37,968 --> 00:15:39,302
  1781. Okay.
  1782.  
  1783. 408
  1784. 00:15:39,304 --> 00:15:40,302
  1785. Hey, Syd?
  1786.  
  1787. 409
  1788. 00:15:40,304 --> 00:15:40,936
  1789. Yes?
  1790.  
  1791. 410
  1792. 00:15:40,938 --> 00:15:42,304
  1793. I love you.
  1794.  
  1795. 411
  1796. 00:15:42,306 --> 00:15:43,639
  1797. You'd better, there's
  1798. no going back now.
  1799.  
  1800. 412
  1801. 00:15:43,641 --> 00:15:44,874
  1802. But I will see you tomorrow.
  1803.  
  1804. 413
  1805. 00:15:44,876 --> 00:15:46,008
  1806. We've gotta go over
  1807. music for the band
  1808.  
  1809. 414
  1810. 00:15:46,010 --> 00:15:47,777
  1811. and seating arrangements.
  1812.  
  1813. 415
  1814. 00:15:47,779 --> 00:15:48,677
  1815. Can't wait.
  1816.  
  1817. 416
  1818. 00:15:48,679 --> 00:15:50,046
  1819. Mwah, 10:15!
  1820.  
  1821. 417
  1822. 00:15:50,048 --> 00:15:50,913
  1823. With bells on!
  1824.  
  1825. 418
  1826. 00:15:50,915 --> 00:15:51,750
  1827. Okay.
  1828.  
  1829. 419
  1830. 00:15:55,053 --> 00:15:56,085
  1831. He seems in a hurry.
  1832.  
  1833. 420
  1834. 00:15:56,087 --> 00:15:57,720
  1835. He's
  1836. dead tired, Kelly.
  1837.  
  1838. 421
  1839. 00:15:57,722 --> 00:15:58,921
  1840. Uh-huh.
  1841.  
  1842. 422
  1843. 00:15:58,923 --> 00:16:00,089
  1844. What's
  1845. that supposed to mean?
  1846.  
  1847. 423
  1848. 00:16:00,091 --> 00:16:02,557
  1849. Uh-huh, from the Latin.
  1850.  
  1851. 424
  1852. 00:16:02,559 --> 00:16:04,360
  1853. Uh meaning he's acting fishy,
  1854.  
  1855. 425
  1856. 00:16:04,362 --> 00:16:06,328
  1857. and huh meaning he's
  1858. up to something.
  1859.  
  1860. 426
  1861. 00:16:06,330 --> 00:16:08,029
  1862. Okay, spare me your
  1863. paranoid fantasies.
  1864.  
  1865. 427
  1866. 00:16:08,031 --> 00:16:10,466
  1867. I know you don't like Nick
  1868. but you gotta get used to him.
  1869.  
  1870. 428
  1871. 00:16:10,468 --> 00:16:12,067
  1872. As of Sunday, he's family.
  1873.  
  1874. 429
  1875. 00:16:12,069 --> 00:16:13,668
  1876. I like him fine.
  1877.  
  1878. 430
  1879. 00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:16,004
  1880. He's just, you
  1881. know, he's a little,
  1882.  
  1883. 431
  1884. 00:16:16,006 --> 00:16:17,673
  1885. a little too perfect.
  1886.  
  1887. 432
  1888. 00:16:17,675 --> 00:16:18,974
  1889. You talking about in bed?
  1890.  
  1891. 433
  1892. 00:16:18,976 --> 00:16:20,011
  1893. What?
  1894.  
  1895. 434
  1896. 00:16:21,612 --> 00:16:25,581
  1897. - Don't hit my belly!
  1898. - I didn't mean to!
  1899.  
  1900. 435
  1901. 00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:26,548
  1902. Can I have your wine?
  1903.  
  1904. 436
  1905. 00:16:26,550 --> 00:16:27,383
  1906. No, you can't have wine.
  1907.  
  1908. 437
  1909. 00:16:27,385 --> 00:16:28,017
  1910. Can I have a sip?
  1911.  
  1912. 438
  1913. 00:16:28,019 --> 00:16:29,788
  1914. No wine, no sips.
  1915.  
  1916. 439
  1917. 00:16:35,760 --> 00:16:36,926
  1918. First of all,
  1919. absolutely no one
  1920.  
  1921. 440
  1922. 00:16:36,928 --> 00:16:38,594
  1923. can know about this meeting.
  1924.  
  1925. 441
  1926. 00:16:38,596 --> 00:16:40,096
  1927. Is that clear?
  1928.  
  1929. 442
  1930. 00:16:40,098 --> 00:16:41,663
  1931. Perhaps we should talk in code
  1932.  
  1933. 443
  1934. 00:16:41,665 --> 00:16:43,065
  1935. in case your house
  1936. has been bugged
  1937.  
  1938. 444
  1939. 00:16:43,067 --> 00:16:45,033
  1940. by the secret paternity police?
  1941.  
  1942. 445
  1943. 00:16:45,035 --> 00:16:47,036
  1944. I'm so glad you're
  1945. amused by this.
  1946.  
  1947. 446
  1948. 00:16:47,038 --> 00:16:48,604
  1949. You have no idea what
  1950. this could do to me.
  1951.  
  1952. 447
  1953. 00:16:48,606 --> 00:16:49,941
  1954. Oh, yes, I do.
  1955.  
  1956. 448
  1957. 00:16:50,942 --> 00:16:52,174
  1958. Scandal!
  1959.  
  1960. 449
  1961. 00:16:52,176 --> 00:16:55,043
  1962. Man who makes fun of people
  1963. who have children for a living
  1964.  
  1965. 450
  1966. 00:16:55,045 --> 00:16:57,145
  1967. doesn't know he
  1968. has one of his own.
  1969.  
  1970. 451
  1971. 00:16:57,147 --> 00:16:58,547
  1972. Tabloids love that
  1973. kind of stuff.
  1974.  
  1975. 452
  1976. 00:16:58,549 --> 00:17:00,482
  1977. It's not just that.
  1978.  
  1979. 453
  1980. 00:17:00,484 --> 00:17:01,116
  1981. It's Sydney.
  1982.  
  1983. 454
  1984. 00:17:01,118 --> 00:17:02,784
  1985. Who's he?
  1986.  
  1987. 455
  1988. 00:17:02,786 --> 00:17:05,520
  1989. She is my fiancee and we're
  1990. getting married on Sunday.
  1991.  
  1992. 456
  1993. 00:17:05,522 --> 00:17:06,489
  1994. What's wrong?
  1995.  
  1996. 457
  1997. 00:17:06,491 --> 00:17:08,457
  1998. You don't think she'll like me?
  1999.  
  2000. 458
  2001. 00:17:08,459 --> 00:17:11,160
  2002. Well, children aren't
  2003. part of our plan.
  2004.  
  2005. 459
  2006. 00:17:11,162 --> 00:17:13,561
  2007. Well, you should have made
  2008. that plan before you made me.
  2009.  
  2010. 460
  2011. 00:17:13,563 --> 00:17:15,698
  2012. Preach the gospel.
  2013.  
  2014. 461
  2015. 00:17:15,700 --> 00:17:17,799
  2016. That's insane.
  2017.  
  2018. 462
  2019. 00:17:17,801 --> 00:17:21,036
  2020. How do I even know
  2021. that this is my DNA?
  2022.  
  2023. 463
  2024. 00:17:21,038 --> 00:17:23,605
  2025. Well, about six months ago,
  2026.  
  2027. 464
  2028. 00:17:23,607 --> 00:17:25,641
  2029. I was listening to
  2030. Fabular's radio show.
  2031.  
  2032. 465
  2033. 00:17:25,643 --> 00:17:27,710
  2034. Saturday mornings,
  2035. we have The Amazing Fabular.
  2036.  
  2037. 466
  2038. 00:17:27,712 --> 00:17:29,979
  2039. Which I really like to
  2040. listen to every Saturday.
  2041.  
  2042. 467
  2043. 00:17:29,981 --> 00:17:32,615
  2044. I like the extra sensory
  2045. perception and stuff.
  2046.  
  2047. 468
  2048. 00:17:32,617 --> 00:17:36,519
  2049. And all of a sudden, The
  2050. Amazing Fabular says...
  2051.  
  2052. 469
  2053. 00:17:36,521 --> 00:17:37,356
  2054. Mason?
  2055.  
  2056. 470
  2057. 00:17:38,522 --> 00:17:40,692
  2058. I know who your father is.
  2059.  
  2060. 471
  2061. 00:17:41,858 --> 00:17:44,993
  2062. So of course I'm
  2063. like, wait a second.
  2064.  
  2065. 472
  2066. 00:17:44,995 --> 00:17:49,164
  2067. My name is Mason so maybe I'm
  2068. the Mason he's talking about.
  2069.  
  2070. 473
  2071. 00:17:49,166 --> 00:17:52,601
  2072. So I call up the show and
  2073. Fabular tells me it's me
  2074.  
  2075. 474
  2076. 00:17:52,603 --> 00:17:56,971
  2077. and that my dad's a famous
  2078. writer named Nick Pearson.
  2079.  
  2080. 475
  2081. 00:17:56,973 --> 00:17:57,975
  2082. That's you.
  2083.  
  2084. 476
  2085. 00:17:59,109 --> 00:18:00,875
  2086. Yes, I know that that's me.
  2087.  
  2088. 477
  2089. 00:18:00,877 --> 00:18:02,111
  2090. I mean, what are the odds?
  2091.  
  2092. 478
  2093. 00:18:02,113 --> 00:18:05,114
  2094. Crazy ones, if you think about
  2095. it because when I was born,
  2096.  
  2097. 479
  2098. 00:18:05,116 --> 00:18:07,082
  2099. Mason was a super popular name,
  2100.  
  2101. 480
  2102. 00:18:07,084 --> 00:18:10,085
  2103. so there are like
  2104. a kajillion Masons.
  2105.  
  2106. 481
  2107. 00:18:10,087 --> 00:18:11,453
  2108. Sure, okay.
  2109.  
  2110. 482
  2111. 00:18:11,455 --> 00:18:12,821
  2112. So then I went on the internet
  2113.  
  2114. 483
  2115. 00:18:12,823 --> 00:18:14,656
  2116. and I Googled Nick Pearson.
  2117.  
  2118. 484
  2119. 00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:16,759
  2120. And a lot of stuff came up
  2121. about how you write books,
  2122.  
  2123. 485
  2124. 00:18:16,761 --> 00:18:18,861
  2125. about how you hate
  2126. kids and little dogs.
  2127.  
  2128. 486
  2129. 00:18:18,863 --> 00:18:20,195
  2130. Yeah, and I hate psychics.
  2131.  
  2132. 487
  2133. 00:18:20,197 --> 00:18:22,163
  2134. Where are your manners?
  2135.  
  2136. 488
  2137. 00:18:22,165 --> 00:18:24,165
  2138. Go on, come on.
  2139.  
  2140. 489
  2141. 00:18:24,167 --> 00:18:26,134
  2142. Get to the DNA bit.
  2143.  
  2144. 490
  2145. 00:18:26,136 --> 00:18:28,938
  2146. Right, well, I needed
  2147. some part of your body.
  2148.  
  2149. 491
  2150. 00:18:28,940 --> 00:18:30,940
  2151. So I went on eBay
  2152. and I found somebody
  2153.  
  2154. 492
  2155. 00:18:30,942 --> 00:18:32,540
  2156. selling a lock of your hair.
  2157.  
  2158. 493
  2159. 00:18:32,542 --> 00:18:33,642
  2160. What?
  2161.  
  2162. 494
  2163. 00:18:33,644 --> 00:18:35,243
  2164. Yeah, it's your barber.
  2165.  
  2166. 495
  2167. 00:18:35,245 --> 00:18:37,078
  2168. He collects the hair
  2169. of his famous clients
  2170.  
  2171. 496
  2172. 00:18:37,080 --> 00:18:38,849
  2173. and sells it on eBay.
  2174.  
  2175. 497
  2176. 00:18:40,251 --> 00:18:42,151
  2177. That could be anybody's hair.
  2178.  
  2179. 498
  2180. 00:18:42,153 --> 00:18:44,619
  2181. Is your barber named
  2182. Nino Spaghettios?
  2183.  
  2184. 499
  2185. 00:18:44,621 --> 00:18:46,255
  2186. Nino Spanetti.
  2187.  
  2188. 500
  2189. 00:18:46,257 --> 00:18:48,156
  2190. Oh, my god.
  2191.  
  2192. 501
  2193. 00:18:48,158 --> 00:18:51,527
  2194. So then I bid on
  2195. the auction and I won.
  2196.  
  2197. 502
  2198. 00:18:51,529 --> 00:18:55,196
  2199. Then I found a place on the
  2200. internet that does DNA testing.
  2201.  
  2202. 503
  2203. 00:18:55,198 --> 00:19:00,204
  2204. So I cut off a piece of my
  2205. hair and sent in those samples.
  2206.  
  2207. 504
  2208. 00:19:03,007 --> 00:19:05,143
  2209. A few weeks later,
  2210. the results came back.
  2211.  
  2212. 505
  2213. 00:19:07,244 --> 00:19:09,044
  2214. It was a match!
  2215.  
  2216. 506
  2217. 00:19:09,046 --> 00:19:10,011
  2218. Yes!
  2219.  
  2220. 507
  2221. 00:19:10,013 --> 00:19:10,848
  2222. Yes, yes!
  2223.  
  2224. 508
  2225. 00:19:11,915 --> 00:19:14,215
  2226. So then I called The
  2227. Amazing Fabular to tell him
  2228.  
  2229. 509
  2230. 00:19:14,217 --> 00:19:16,050
  2231. and he said he wanted
  2232. see the look on your face
  2233.  
  2234. 510
  2235. 00:19:16,052 --> 00:19:17,553
  2236. when I told you.
  2237.  
  2238. 511
  2239. 00:19:17,555 --> 00:19:20,559
  2240. There's nothing
  2241. like live theater.
  2242.  
  2243. 512
  2244. 00:19:24,861 --> 00:19:27,162
  2245. I know what I'm gonna
  2246. title my next book.
  2247.  
  2248. 513
  2249. 00:19:27,164 --> 00:19:31,232
  2250. I Hate the Internet
  2251. and Hairstylists.
  2252.  
  2253. 514
  2254. 00:19:31,234 --> 00:19:33,237
  2255. Don't forget psychics.
  2256.  
  2257. 515
  2258. 00:19:35,071 --> 00:19:36,073
  2259. All right.
  2260.  
  2261. 516
  2262. 00:19:37,541 --> 00:19:39,008
  2263. What do you want, kid?
  2264.  
  2265. 517
  2266. 00:19:39,010 --> 00:19:40,542
  2267. I just wanna find my mom.
  2268.  
  2269. 518
  2270. 00:19:40,544 --> 00:19:41,479
  2271. Your mom?
  2272.  
  2273. 519
  2274. 00:19:42,646 --> 00:19:44,779
  2275. Who's been taking care
  2276. of you all these years?
  2277.  
  2278. 520
  2279. 00:19:44,781 --> 00:19:46,949
  2280. I have a foster mother.
  2281.  
  2282. 521
  2283. 00:19:46,951 --> 00:19:48,584
  2284. Annie Gordon.
  2285.  
  2286. 522
  2287. 00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:50,219
  2288. This is really good, Annie.
  2289.  
  2290. 523
  2291. 00:19:50,221 --> 00:19:52,988
  2292. But she's getting really old.
  2293.  
  2294. 524
  2295. 00:19:52,990 --> 00:19:54,925
  2296. And she has narcolepsy.
  2297.  
  2298. 525
  2299. 00:19:57,194 --> 00:19:58,093
  2300. Annie?
  2301.  
  2302. 526
  2303. 00:19:58,095 --> 00:19:59,929
  2304. She can't take care
  2305. of herself anymore
  2306.  
  2307. 527
  2308. 00:19:59,931 --> 00:20:02,964
  2309. so she's being moved into a home
  2310.  
  2311. 528
  2312. 00:20:02,966 --> 00:20:06,035
  2313. which means I'll end
  2314. up back in foster care.
  2315.  
  2316. 529
  2317. 00:20:06,037 --> 00:20:09,971
  2318. That's why she let me come here
  2319. with Fabular to find my mom.
  2320.  
  2321. 530
  2322. 00:20:09,973 --> 00:20:13,909
  2323. A wise, wise woman, with
  2324. an acute sense of character.
  2325.  
  2326. 531
  2327. 00:20:13,911 --> 00:20:16,778
  2328. I imagine she wouldn't
  2329. like you very much.
  2330.  
  2331. 532
  2332. 00:20:16,780 --> 00:20:19,114
  2333. Look, I know you
  2334. don't want me, Nick
  2335.  
  2336. 533
  2337. 00:20:19,116 --> 00:20:20,782
  2338. because you're famous
  2339. for hating kids and all.
  2340.  
  2341. 534
  2342. 00:20:20,784 --> 00:20:24,255
  2343. No, I don't exactly hate kids.
  2344.  
  2345. 535
  2346. 00:20:24,955 --> 00:20:28,792
  2347. You're the only one
  2348. who knows who my mom is.
  2349.  
  2350. 536
  2351. 00:20:32,863 --> 00:20:34,866
  2352. Okay, how old are you?
  2353.  
  2354. 537
  2355. 00:20:35,832 --> 00:20:36,634
  2356. 13.
  2357.  
  2358. 538
  2359. 00:20:37,635 --> 00:20:38,837
  2360. 13 plus nine.
  2361.  
  2362. 539
  2363. 00:20:40,704 --> 00:20:43,875
  2364. Where was I 14 years ago?
  2365.  
  2366. 540
  2367. 00:20:46,344 --> 00:20:48,076
  2368. Oh, my god.
  2369.  
  2370. 541
  2371. 00:20:48,078 --> 00:20:51,279
  2372. All right, this is gonna be
  2373. more difficult than I thought.
  2374.  
  2375. 542
  2376. 00:20:51,281 --> 00:20:56,117
  2377. Let's say I was acquainted
  2378. with a lotta different ladies
  2379.  
  2380. 543
  2381. 00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:57,685
  2382. at that time of my life.
  2383.  
  2384. 544
  2385. 00:20:57,687 --> 00:20:58,753
  2386. How quaint.
  2387.  
  2388. 545
  2389. 00:20:58,755 --> 00:20:59,954
  2390. And that's the other issue.
  2391.  
  2392. 546
  2393. 00:20:59,956 --> 00:21:03,692
  2394. I don't want my fiancee or
  2395. my in-laws to know about this
  2396.  
  2397. 547
  2398. 00:21:03,694 --> 00:21:05,827
  2399. bountiful romantic
  2400. history of mine.
  2401.  
  2402. 548
  2403. 00:21:05,829 --> 00:21:07,762
  2404. You have such
  2405. a way with words.
  2406.  
  2407. 549
  2408. 00:21:07,764 --> 00:21:09,932
  2409. You really should be
  2410. writing cards for Hallmark.
  2411.  
  2412. 550
  2413. 00:21:09,934 --> 00:21:11,666
  2414. Hey, if you're
  2415. such a good psychic,
  2416.  
  2417. 551
  2418. 00:21:11,668 --> 00:21:14,369
  2419. how come you can't
  2420. see who his mother is?
  2421.  
  2422. 552
  2423. 00:21:14,371 --> 00:21:16,404
  2424. Because this journey was meant
  2425.  
  2426. 553
  2427. 00:21:16,406 --> 00:21:17,839
  2428. for the both of you
  2429. to take together.
  2430.  
  2431. 554
  2432. 00:21:17,841 --> 00:21:19,307
  2433. Isn't that right, Mr. Sparkles?
  2434.  
  2435. 555
  2436. 00:21:22,379 --> 00:21:23,581
  2437. All right.
  2438.  
  2439. 556
  2440. 00:21:26,117 --> 00:21:29,852
  2441. Despite the chorus
  2442. of voices in my head
  2443.  
  2444. 557
  2445. 00:21:29,854 --> 00:21:31,086
  2446. that are screaming like banshees
  2447.  
  2448. 558
  2449. 00:21:31,088 --> 00:21:34,259
  2450. to run like hell
  2451. from you two weirdos,
  2452.  
  2453. 559
  2454. 00:21:36,059 --> 00:21:37,358
  2455. I'll help you.
  2456.  
  2457. 560
  2458. 00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:38,460
  2459. Really?
  2460.  
  2461. 561
  2462. 00:21:38,462 --> 00:21:43,265
  2463. But the deal is I will
  2464. give you two days of my time
  2465.  
  2466. 562
  2467. 00:21:43,267 --> 00:21:46,367
  2468. and if we don't discover
  2469. who your mom is by then,
  2470.  
  2471. 563
  2472. 00:21:46,369 --> 00:21:47,303
  2473. you move on, I move on
  2474.  
  2475. 564
  2476. 00:21:47,305 --> 00:21:49,070
  2477. and we close this
  2478. chapter of our lives.
  2479.  
  2480. 565
  2481. 00:21:49,072 --> 00:21:50,138
  2482. Is that clear?
  2483.  
  2484. 566
  2485. 00:21:50,140 --> 00:21:50,941
  2486. Deal.
  2487.  
  2488. 567
  2489. 00:21:55,745 --> 00:21:57,445
  2490. All right, meet me back
  2491. here tomorrow morning.
  2492.  
  2493. 568
  2494. 00:21:57,447 --> 00:22:00,048
  2495. I'll research the possibilities.
  2496.  
  2497. 569
  2498. 00:22:00,050 --> 00:22:01,416
  2499. And with any luck, I'll wake up
  2500.  
  2501. 570
  2502. 00:22:01,418 --> 00:22:05,319
  2503. and this will be a
  2504. bourbon-induced nightmare.
  2505.  
  2506. 571
  2507. 00:22:05,321 --> 00:22:06,788
  2508. Let us take leave
  2509. of this Lothario
  2510.  
  2511. 572
  2512. 00:22:06,790 --> 00:22:08,723
  2513. and investigate the
  2514. many places this man
  2515.  
  2516. 573
  2517. 00:22:08,725 --> 00:22:10,895
  2518. may have planted his seed.
  2519.  
  2520. 574
  2521. 00:22:12,096 --> 00:22:14,098
  2522. We'll see ourselves out.
  2523.  
  2524. 575
  2525. 00:22:14,999 --> 00:22:16,832
  2526. Night, Dad.
  2527.  
  2528. 576
  2529. 00:22:16,834 --> 00:22:18,901
  2530. Good night, kid.
  2531.  
  2532. 577
  2533. 00:22:18,903 --> 00:22:19,971
  2534. It's Mason.
  2535.  
  2536. 578
  2537. 00:22:20,870 --> 00:22:22,339
  2538. Good night, Mason.
  2539.  
  2540. 579
  2541. 00:22:40,724 --> 00:22:41,824
  2542. Thank you.
  2543.  
  2544. 580
  2545. 00:22:41,826 --> 00:22:43,092
  2546. Thanks, come again.
  2547.  
  2548. 581
  2549. 00:22:45,396 --> 00:22:47,028
  2550. Hey, sweetheart,
  2551. where are you?
  2552.  
  2553. 582
  2554. 00:22:47,030 --> 00:22:47,930
  2555. Don't say late.
  2556.  
  2557. 583
  2558. 00:22:47,932 --> 00:22:48,797
  2559. Where is he?
  2560.  
  2561. 584
  2562. 00:22:50,267 --> 00:22:53,268
  2563. Hey, look, Syd, a
  2564. little situation came up.
  2565.  
  2566. 585
  2567. 00:22:53,270 --> 00:22:54,435
  2568. A situation?
  2569.  
  2570. 586
  2571. 00:22:54,437 --> 00:22:55,804
  2572. Oh, really?
  2573.  
  2574. 587
  2575. 00:22:55,806 --> 00:22:57,105
  2576. I said, shush!
  2577.  
  2578. 588
  2579. 00:22:57,107 --> 00:22:58,073
  2580. What'd you say?
  2581.  
  2582. 589
  2583. 00:22:58,075 --> 00:22:58,906
  2584. Not you, hon.
  2585.  
  2586. 590
  2587. 00:22:58,908 --> 00:23:00,409
  2588. What's going on?
  2589.  
  2590. 591
  2591. 00:23:00,411 --> 00:23:03,112
  2592. Oh, well, so I got a call
  2593. from Albert this morning.
  2594.  
  2595. 592
  2596. 00:23:03,114 --> 00:23:06,381
  2597. It turns out one of their
  2598. college circuit lecturers
  2599.  
  2600. 593
  2601. 00:23:06,383 --> 00:23:07,782
  2602. dropped out.
  2603.  
  2604. 594
  2605. 00:23:07,784 --> 00:23:10,486
  2606. I gotta pop up to Santa
  2607. Barbara and fill in.
  2608.  
  2609. 595
  2610. 00:23:10,488 --> 00:23:12,121
  2611. And you agreed?
  2612.  
  2613. 596
  2614. 00:23:12,123 --> 00:23:13,489
  2615. You've gotta be
  2616. kidding me, Nick!
  2617.  
  2618. 597
  2619. 00:23:13,491 --> 00:23:14,789
  2620. What is it?
  2621.  
  2622. 598
  2623. 00:23:14,791 --> 00:23:16,025
  2624. - What is he doing?
  2625. - Stop!
  2626.  
  2627. 599
  2628. 00:23:16,027 --> 00:23:18,227
  2629. I know that the timing is
  2630. inconvenient but it's Albert.
  2631.  
  2632. 600
  2633. 00:23:18,229 --> 00:23:19,461
  2634. It's not like I
  2635. can say no to him.
  2636.  
  2637. 601
  2638. 00:23:19,463 --> 00:23:20,796
  2639. He's my publisher, babe.
  2640.  
  2641. 602
  2642. 00:23:20,798 --> 00:23:22,364
  2643. A little inconvenient?
  2644.  
  2645. 603
  2646. 00:23:22,366 --> 00:23:24,432
  2647. The wedding is this Sunday!
  2648.  
  2649. 604
  2650. 00:23:24,434 --> 00:23:26,067
  2651. I mean, can't they
  2652. find somebody else?
  2653.  
  2654. 605
  2655. 00:23:26,069 --> 00:23:28,403
  2656. Maybe somebody who
  2657. isn't about to celebrate
  2658.  
  2659. 606
  2660. 00:23:28,405 --> 00:23:30,905
  2661. the most important day
  2662. of their entire life?
  2663.  
  2664. 607
  2665. 00:23:30,907 --> 00:23:32,540
  2666. I'll only be gone a day.
  2667.  
  2668. 608
  2669. 00:23:32,542 --> 00:23:33,374
  2670. Maybe two.
  2671.  
  2672. 609
  2673. 00:23:33,376 --> 00:23:34,308
  2674. Two?
  2675.  
  2676. 610
  2677. 00:23:34,310 --> 00:23:36,244
  2678. I don't know what to say.
  2679.  
  2680. 611
  2681. 00:23:36,246 --> 00:23:37,479
  2682. I'll be back
  2683. before you know it.
  2684.  
  2685. 612
  2686. 00:23:37,481 --> 00:23:39,181
  2687. Besides, don't they
  2688. say it's bad luck
  2689.  
  2690. 613
  2691. 00:23:39,183 --> 00:23:41,450
  2692. for the groom to see the
  2693. bride before the wedding?
  2694.  
  2695. 614
  2696. 00:23:41,452 --> 00:23:44,086
  2697. But they don't mean
  2698. the whole weekend!
  2699.  
  2700. 615
  2701. 00:23:44,088 --> 00:23:46,855
  2702. And I love how understanding
  2703. you're being, honey.
  2704.  
  2705. 616
  2706. 00:23:46,857 --> 00:23:49,258
  2707. No, I'm actually not
  2708. being understanding.
  2709.  
  2710. 617
  2711. 00:23:49,260 --> 00:23:52,161
  2712. This is not the sound of
  2713. someone being understanding.
  2714.  
  2715. 618
  2716. 00:23:52,163 --> 00:23:53,561
  2717. Oh, my gosh.
  2718.  
  2719. 619
  2720. 00:23:53,563 --> 00:23:55,263
  2721. Okay, so now you
  2722. suddenly have to disappear
  2723.  
  2724. 620
  2725. 00:23:55,265 --> 00:23:57,065
  2726. for a few days right
  2727. before your own wedding?
  2728.  
  2729. 621
  2730. 00:23:57,067 --> 00:23:58,432
  2731. That sounds pretty
  2732. suspicious to me, Nick.
  2733.  
  2734. 622
  2735. 00:23:58,434 --> 00:24:00,501
  2736. Hey, Kelly, my
  2737. favorite sister.
  2738.  
  2739. 623
  2740. 00:24:00,503 --> 00:24:02,471
  2741. In-law.
  2742.  
  2743. 624
  2744. 00:24:02,473 --> 00:24:04,138
  2745. All right, look,
  2746. I gotta get going
  2747.  
  2748. 625
  2749. 00:24:04,140 --> 00:24:07,111
  2750. so tell Syd I'll ring her
  2751. when I get there, bye.
  2752.  
  2753. 626
  2754. 00:24:10,580 --> 00:24:12,815
  2755. I'm telling you,
  2756. he's up to something.
  2757.  
  2758. 627
  2759. 00:24:12,817 --> 00:24:14,549
  2760. Maybe it is something good.
  2761.  
  2762. 628
  2763. 00:24:14,551 --> 00:24:16,951
  2764. Did you ever think of that?
  2765.  
  2766. 629
  2767. 00:24:16,953 --> 00:24:21,056
  2768. No, Sydney, there is
  2769. something he's not telling you.
  2770.  
  2771. 630
  2772. 00:24:21,058 --> 00:24:22,223
  2773. And I think it has
  2774. something to do
  2775.  
  2776. 631
  2777. 00:24:22,225 --> 00:24:24,058
  2778. with that kid from last night.
  2779.  
  2780. 632
  2781. 00:24:24,060 --> 00:24:26,461
  2782. Nick just explained
  2783. the situation
  2784.  
  2785. 633
  2786. 00:24:26,463 --> 00:24:28,262
  2787. and I have no reason
  2788. not to trust him.
  2789.  
  2790. 634
  2791. 00:24:28,264 --> 00:24:30,164
  2792. I'm just saying.
  2793.  
  2794. 635
  2795. 00:24:30,166 --> 00:24:31,336
  2796. I have to pee.
  2797.  
  2798. 636
  2799. 00:24:32,936 --> 00:24:34,603
  2800. Oh, oh, oh, oh!
  2801.  
  2802. 637
  2803. 00:24:34,605 --> 00:24:35,837
  2804. The baby's kicking!
  2805.  
  2806. 638
  2807. 00:24:35,839 --> 00:24:36,471
  2808. You wanna feel it?
  2809.  
  2810. 639
  2811. 00:24:36,473 --> 00:24:37,940
  2812. No, I'm okay.
  2813.  
  2814. 640
  2815. 00:24:37,942 --> 00:24:39,141
  2816. No, no, come on,
  2817. feel it, feel it.
  2818.  
  2819. 641
  2820. 00:24:39,143 --> 00:24:40,075
  2821. No, I actually
  2822. don't wanna feel it.
  2823.  
  2824. 642
  2825. 00:24:40,077 --> 00:24:41,076
  2826. Just feel it for a second.
  2827.  
  2828. 643
  2829. 00:24:41,078 --> 00:24:41,676
  2830. - Just for a second.
  2831. - Actually, I don't really
  2832.  
  2833. 644
  2834. 00:24:41,678 --> 00:24:42,377
  2835. - want to.
  2836. - No, come here.
  2837.  
  2838. 645
  2839. 00:24:42,379 --> 00:24:45,513
  2840. Say hello to your Aunt Sydney!
  2841.  
  2842. 646
  2843. 00:24:45,515 --> 00:24:47,449
  2844. Ooh, it's just so weird!
  2845.  
  2846. 647
  2847. 00:24:47,451 --> 00:24:48,851
  2848. It's so strange!
  2849.  
  2850. 648
  2851. 00:24:48,853 --> 00:24:51,053
  2852. Why can't human
  2853. beings just lay eggs
  2854.  
  2855. 649
  2856. 00:24:51,055 --> 00:24:53,888
  2857. like more sensible species
  2858. of the animal kingdom?
  2859.  
  2860. 650
  2861. 00:24:53,890 --> 00:24:55,590
  2862. Like peacocks and platypuses.
  2863.  
  2864. 651
  2865. 00:24:55,592 --> 00:24:57,896
  2866. It's just so much easier.
  2867.  
  2868. 652
  2869. 00:25:06,036 --> 00:25:07,869
  2870. Ow!
  2871.  
  2872. 653
  2873. 00:25:10,241 --> 00:25:11,573
  2874. Whoa, what the?
  2875.  
  2876. 654
  2877. 00:25:11,575 --> 00:25:12,477
  2878. Surprise.
  2879.  
  2880. 655
  2881. 00:25:13,877 --> 00:25:14,777
  2882. How'd you get in here?
  2883.  
  2884. 656
  2885. 00:25:14,779 --> 00:25:16,411
  2886. You said to come
  2887. back in the morning.
  2888.  
  2889. 657
  2890. 00:25:16,413 --> 00:25:18,547
  2891. The door was unlocked.
  2892.  
  2893. 658
  2894. 00:25:18,549 --> 00:25:20,615
  2895. What are you doing
  2896. to my furniture?
  2897.  
  2898. 659
  2899. 00:25:20,617 --> 00:25:22,550
  2900. The feng shui was off.
  2901.  
  2902. 660
  2903. 00:25:22,552 --> 00:25:24,486
  2904. It simply had to be done.
  2905.  
  2906. 661
  2907. 00:25:24,488 --> 00:25:26,488
  2908. Fabular needs room
  2909. to have a clean aura
  2910.  
  2911. 662
  2912. 00:25:26,490 --> 00:25:27,890
  2913. to receive messages.
  2914.  
  2915. 663
  2916. 00:25:27,892 --> 00:25:29,391
  2917. Yeah?
  2918.  
  2919. 664
  2920. 00:25:29,393 --> 00:25:31,526
  2921. Is he receiving the message
  2922. I'm sending him right now?
  2923.  
  2924. 665
  2925. 00:25:31,528 --> 00:25:32,961
  2926. Do you loofah?
  2927.  
  2928. 666
  2929. 00:25:32,963 --> 00:25:33,929
  2930. Do I what?
  2931.  
  2932. 667
  2933. 00:25:33,931 --> 00:25:35,463
  2934. Loofah, I mean, do you loofah?
  2935.  
  2936. 668
  2937. 00:25:35,465 --> 00:25:36,298
  2938. I don't loofah.
  2939.  
  2940. 669
  2941. 00:25:36,300 --> 00:25:37,598
  2942. You should loofah.
  2943.  
  2944. 670
  2945. 00:25:37,600 --> 00:25:39,268
  2946. I don't wanna loofah.
  2947.  
  2948. 671
  2949. 00:25:39,270 --> 00:25:40,903
  2950. It removes the dead cells
  2951.  
  2952. 672
  2953. 00:25:40,905 --> 00:25:45,274
  2954. and helps add a delightful
  2955. luster to your skin.
  2956.  
  2957. 673
  2958. 00:25:45,276 --> 00:25:47,375
  2959. I got a book on the New
  2960. York Times Best Seller list.
  2961.  
  2962. 674
  2963. 00:25:47,377 --> 00:25:49,146
  2964. I don't need a
  2965. delightful luster.
  2966.  
  2967. 675
  2968. 00:25:56,319 --> 00:25:59,957
  2969. Your rat took a
  2970. dump on my carpet.
  2971.  
  2972. 676
  2973. 00:26:01,457 --> 00:26:03,624
  2974. Oh, Mr. Sparkles!
  2975.  
  2976. 677
  2977. 00:26:03,626 --> 00:26:07,098
  2978. Why didn't you tell me you
  2979. needed to make a stinky?
  2980.  
  2981. 678
  2982. 00:26:08,933 --> 00:26:11,133
  2983. Santa Barbara, huh?
  2984.  
  2985. 679
  2986. 00:26:11,135 --> 00:26:13,134
  2987. Ooh, maybe you should pop
  2988. by for a surprise visit.
  2989.  
  2990. 680
  2991. 00:26:13,136 --> 00:26:14,670
  2992. Ha, ha, that's funny
  2993.  
  2994. 681
  2995. 00:26:14,672 --> 00:26:16,672
  2996. but we still have to hit the
  2997. bridal shop and nail salon.
  2998.  
  2999. 682
  3000. 00:26:16,674 --> 00:26:18,406
  3001. Okay, I was just saying, I
  3002. thought it'd be a nice gesture.
  3003.  
  3004. 683
  3005. 00:26:18,408 --> 00:26:20,509
  3006. That would be a sneaky
  3007. and suspicious gesture.
  3008.  
  3009. 684
  3010. 00:26:20,511 --> 00:26:21,676
  3011. Only if he's actually there.
  3012.  
  3013. 685
  3014. 00:26:21,678 --> 00:26:22,544
  3015. Of course he's there!
  3016.  
  3017. 686
  3018. 00:26:22,546 --> 00:26:23,679
  3019. Just stop it, Kelly.
  3020.  
  3021. 687
  3022. 00:26:23,681 --> 00:26:25,579
  3023. There's no way you're
  3024. getting into my head on this.
  3025.  
  3026. 688
  3027. 00:26:25,581 --> 00:26:26,647
  3028. I'm pretty sure I will.
  3029.  
  3030. 689
  3031. 00:26:26,649 --> 00:26:28,652
  3032. Just drink your juice.
  3033.  
  3034. 690
  3035. 00:26:31,454 --> 00:26:32,653
  3036. Last night, I sorted
  3037. through all these letters
  3038.  
  3039. 691
  3040. 00:26:32,655 --> 00:26:36,191
  3041. and address books and I came
  3042. up with a few possibilities.
  3043.  
  3044. 692
  3045. 00:26:36,193 --> 00:26:39,030
  3046. Mmm, I'm sensing
  3047. something here.
  3048.  
  3049. 693
  3050. 00:26:40,297 --> 00:26:41,696
  3051. Oh, I'm so glad you're here
  3052.  
  3053. 694
  3054. 00:26:41,698 --> 00:26:44,066
  3055. to substantiate all my research.
  3056.  
  3057. 695
  3058. 00:26:44,068 --> 00:26:46,367
  3059. I'm getting an A.
  3060.  
  3061. 696
  3062. 00:26:46,369 --> 00:26:48,069
  3063. A really big A.
  3064.  
  3065. 697
  3066. 00:26:48,071 --> 00:26:49,971
  3067. Well, that makes two of us.
  3068.  
  3069. 698
  3070. 00:26:49,973 --> 00:26:51,640
  3071. Such darkness!
  3072.  
  3073. 699
  3074. 00:26:51,642 --> 00:26:54,108
  3075. Well, I'm filled with darkness
  3076. before my morning coffee.
  3077.  
  3078. 700
  3079. 00:26:54,110 --> 00:26:55,344
  3080. You can make fun
  3081. of me all you wish
  3082.  
  3083. 701
  3084. 00:26:55,346 --> 00:26:56,979
  3085. but I'm still the one
  3086. who identified you
  3087.  
  3088. 702
  3089. 00:26:56,981 --> 00:26:57,680
  3090. as the boy's father.
  3091.  
  3092. 703
  3093. 00:26:57,682 --> 00:26:59,647
  3094. Yep, you keep telling me that.
  3095.  
  3096. 704
  3097. 00:26:59,649 --> 00:27:00,682
  3098. But I'm the one who
  3099. had to figure out
  3100.  
  3101. 705
  3102. 00:27:00,684 --> 00:27:03,352
  3103. which of three Christines
  3104. might be his mother.
  3105.  
  3106. 706
  3107. 00:27:03,354 --> 00:27:04,685
  3108. Three Christine's?
  3109.  
  3110. 707
  3111. 00:27:04,687 --> 00:27:05,721
  3112. Yeah, three Christine's,
  3113. two Jennifer's,
  3114.  
  3115. 708
  3116. 00:27:05,723 --> 00:27:07,288
  3117. two Barbara's, four Patty's...
  3118.  
  3119. 709
  3120. 00:27:07,290 --> 00:27:09,758
  3121. ♪ And a partridge
  3122. in a pear tree ♪
  3123.  
  3124. 710
  3125. 00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:12,259
  3126. Please don't sing ever again.
  3127.  
  3128. 711
  3129. 00:27:12,261 --> 00:27:14,462
  3130. All right, the point is anyway
  3131. that I managed to pinpoint
  3132.  
  3133. 712
  3134. 00:27:14,464 --> 00:27:16,565
  3135. the ones who mathematically
  3136. fit the chronology.
  3137.  
  3138. 713
  3139. 00:27:16,567 --> 00:27:19,233
  3140. And none of them begin with A.
  3141.  
  3142. 714
  3143. 00:27:19,235 --> 00:27:22,403
  3144. So then, how do we figure
  3145. out which one's my mother?
  3146.  
  3147. 715
  3148. 00:27:22,405 --> 00:27:23,739
  3149. We're gonna take a
  3150. little road trip.
  3151.  
  3152. 716
  3153. 00:27:23,741 --> 00:27:25,374
  3154. I contacted the ladies,
  3155. they know we're coming,
  3156.  
  3157. 717
  3158. 00:27:25,376 --> 00:27:27,041
  3159. they just don't know why yet.
  3160.  
  3161. 718
  3162. 00:27:27,043 --> 00:27:28,676
  3163. Why wouldn't
  3164. you just ask them?
  3165.  
  3166. 719
  3167. 00:27:28,678 --> 00:27:29,744
  3168. Because I think
  3169. something as delicate
  3170.  
  3171. 720
  3172. 00:27:29,746 --> 00:27:31,480
  3173. as one's potential maternity
  3174.  
  3175. 721
  3176. 00:27:31,482 --> 00:27:33,714
  3177. is probably best
  3178. discussed face to face.
  3179.  
  3180. 722
  3181. 00:27:33,716 --> 00:27:34,649
  3182. Got ya.
  3183.  
  3184. 723
  3185. 00:27:34,651 --> 00:27:35,784
  3186. All right, let's get goin'.
  3187.  
  3188. 724
  3189. 00:27:35,786 --> 00:27:36,617
  3190. We have a large amount of people
  3191.  
  3192. 725
  3193. 00:27:36,619 --> 00:27:38,353
  3194. to cover in a small
  3195. amount of time.
  3196.  
  3197. 726
  3198. 00:27:38,355 --> 00:27:40,321
  3199. Not unlike your
  3200. illustrious past.
  3201.  
  3202. 727
  3203. 00:27:40,323 --> 00:27:41,623
  3204. Does he really need to come?
  3205.  
  3206. 728
  3207. 00:27:41,625 --> 00:27:42,259
  3208. Definitely.
  3209.  
  3210. 729
  3211. 00:27:43,126 --> 00:27:44,492
  3212. Let it be known that I require
  3213.  
  3214. 730
  3215. 00:27:44,494 --> 00:27:46,528
  3216. this safari of
  3217. yours to end early
  3218.  
  3219. 731
  3220. 00:27:46,530 --> 00:27:49,463
  3221. as I'm supposed to be at the
  3222. Holiday Inn Burbank on Friday
  3223.  
  3224. 732
  3225. 00:27:49,465 --> 00:27:51,700
  3226. to deliver a keynote speech
  3227. to a symposium of my peers.
  3228.  
  3229. 733
  3230. 00:27:51,702 --> 00:27:53,434
  3231. And my peers tend to be snippy.
  3232.  
  3233. 734
  3234. 00:27:53,436 --> 00:27:55,202
  3235. If we're not done by then,
  3236. I'll have a lot more to answer
  3237.  
  3238. 735
  3239. 00:27:55,204 --> 00:27:57,405
  3240. to than a bunch of
  3241. phony soothsayers.
  3242.  
  3243. 736
  3244. 00:27:57,407 --> 00:27:59,708
  3245. Guys, this car
  3246. only has two seats.
  3247.  
  3248. 737
  3249. 00:27:59,710 --> 00:28:00,712
  3250. Right.
  3251.  
  3252. 738
  3253. 00:28:01,678 --> 00:28:03,478
  3254. I guess we'll have
  3255. to take the Fab-Mobile.
  3256.  
  3257. 739
  3258. 00:28:03,480 --> 00:28:04,712
  3259. The Fab-Mobile?
  3260.  
  3261. 740
  3262. 00:28:04,714 --> 00:28:06,149
  3263. The Fab-Mobile.
  3264.  
  3265. 741
  3266. 00:28:08,719 --> 00:28:09,754
  3267. Perfect.
  3268.  
  3269. 742
  3270. 00:28:10,820 --> 00:28:15,222
  3271. So, what's the name of
  3272. this first member of your
  3273.  
  3274. 743
  3275. 00:28:15,224 --> 00:28:17,462
  3276. countless sexual conquests?
  3277.  
  3278. 744
  3279. 00:28:18,361 --> 00:28:20,394
  3280. Carla Intintoli.
  3281.  
  3282. 745
  3283. 00:28:20,396 --> 00:28:22,230
  3284. I like the name Carla.
  3285.  
  3286. 746
  3287. 00:28:22,232 --> 00:28:23,734
  3288. Carla Intintoli.
  3289.  
  3290. 747
  3291. 00:28:24,768 --> 00:28:26,134
  3292. She is from Italy.
  3293.  
  3294. 748
  3295. 00:28:26,136 --> 00:28:28,737
  3296. No, her dad's Brazilian.
  3297.  
  3298. 749
  3299. 00:28:28,739 --> 00:28:29,640
  3300. Yes, he is.
  3301.  
  3302. 750
  3303. 00:28:30,773 --> 00:28:33,708
  3304. He was a farmer and
  3305. he used his hand
  3306.  
  3307. 751
  3308. 00:28:33,710 --> 00:28:34,776
  3309. to make money for the family.
  3310.  
  3311. 752
  3312. 00:28:34,778 --> 00:28:36,144
  3313. What are you doing?
  3314.  
  3315. 753
  3316. 00:28:36,146 --> 00:28:37,078
  3317. Are you doing psychic
  3318. stuff right now?
  3319.  
  3320. 754
  3321. 00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:38,145
  3322. Don't do that right now, okay?
  3323.  
  3324. 755
  3325. 00:28:38,147 --> 00:28:39,713
  3326. I can't help my blessings.
  3327.  
  3328. 756
  3329. 00:28:39,715 --> 00:28:41,516
  3330. They just come to me, Nick.
  3331.  
  3332. 757
  3333. 00:28:41,518 --> 00:28:42,750
  3334. Really?
  3335.  
  3336. 758
  3337. 00:28:42,752 --> 00:28:44,385
  3338. I thought Mr. Sparkles
  3339. here was the gifted one.
  3340.  
  3341. 759
  3342. 00:28:44,387 --> 00:28:46,755
  3343. Well, it goes to
  3344. Sparkles, then to Fabular.
  3345.  
  3346. 760
  3347. 00:28:46,757 --> 00:28:48,459
  3348. All right, okay.
  3349.  
  3350. 761
  3351. 00:28:49,358 --> 00:28:50,791
  3352. Just don't say anything
  3353.  
  3354. 762
  3355. 00:28:50,793 --> 00:28:53,761
  3356. 'cause I don't wanna
  3357. freak Carla out.
  3358.  
  3359. 763
  3360. 00:28:53,763 --> 00:28:55,665
  3361. It'll be my pleasure.
  3362.  
  3363. 764
  3364. 00:28:57,166 --> 00:28:59,101
  3365. You think she'll remember you?
  3366.  
  3367. 765
  3368. 00:28:59,103 --> 00:29:00,705
  3369. They never forget.
  3370.  
  3371. 766
  3372. 00:29:07,176 --> 00:29:08,777
  3373. Nick?
  3374.  
  3375. 767
  3376. 00:29:08,779 --> 00:29:10,345
  3377. Hi, Carla.
  3378.  
  3379. 768
  3380. 00:29:10,347 --> 00:29:11,779
  3381. Is that really you?
  3382.  
  3383. 769
  3384. 00:29:11,781 --> 00:29:12,817
  3385. It's me.
  3386.  
  3387. 770
  3388. 00:29:14,617 --> 00:29:15,453
  3389. Wow.
  3390.  
  3391. 771
  3392. 00:29:16,453 --> 00:29:19,753
  3393. I never thought I'd have
  3394. this opportunity again.
  3395.  
  3396. 772
  3397. 00:29:19,755 --> 00:29:21,490
  3398. Opportunity?
  3399.  
  3400. 773
  3401. 00:29:26,864 --> 00:29:28,864
  3402. I think it's great
  3403. that she remembers you.
  3404.  
  3405. 774
  3406. 00:29:28,866 --> 00:29:31,465
  3407. Why was she so mad?
  3408.  
  3409. 775
  3410. 00:29:31,467 --> 00:29:34,336
  3411. Well, Mason, when
  3412. relationships end,
  3413.  
  3414. 776
  3415. 00:29:34,338 --> 00:29:36,704
  3416. people get emotional
  3417. because they gotta justify
  3418.  
  3419. 777
  3420. 00:29:36,706 --> 00:29:38,839
  3421. why they were with that
  3422. person in the first place
  3423.  
  3424. 778
  3425. 00:29:38,841 --> 00:29:41,876
  3426. which can manifest itself
  3427. in bitterness, resentment,
  3428.  
  3429. 779
  3430. 00:29:41,878 --> 00:29:43,481
  3431. hatred or violence.
  3432.  
  3433. 780
  3434. 00:29:45,148 --> 00:29:48,549
  3435. Okay, we have a triple patty
  3436. burger with fries, well done
  3437.  
  3438. 781
  3439. 00:29:48,551 --> 00:29:51,586
  3440. and a strawberry shake
  3441. with extra cherries.
  3442.  
  3443. 782
  3444. 00:29:51,588 --> 00:29:53,922
  3445. One small dinner salad,
  3446. hold the croutons
  3447.  
  3448. 783
  3449. 00:29:53,924 --> 00:29:58,792
  3450. add extra garbanzo beans
  3451. and dressing on the side.
  3452.  
  3453. 784
  3454. 00:29:58,794 --> 00:30:01,829
  3455. And one frozen bag of peas.
  3456.  
  3457. 785
  3458. 00:30:01,831 --> 00:30:02,833
  3459. Thank you.
  3460.  
  3461. 786
  3462. 00:30:04,835 --> 00:30:06,401
  3463. I have to pee.
  3464.  
  3465. 787
  3466. 00:30:06,403 --> 00:30:07,805
  3467. I'll be right back.
  3468.  
  3469. 788
  3470. 00:30:09,373 --> 00:30:11,640
  3471. Why do I get the feeling
  3472. that every woman you ever dated
  3473.  
  3474. 789
  3475. 00:30:11,642 --> 00:30:13,407
  3476. has a bone to pick with you?
  3477.  
  3478. 790
  3479. 00:30:13,409 --> 00:30:16,813
  3480. I bet you racked up
  3481. quite the bag of karma.
  3482.  
  3483. 791
  3484. 00:30:17,947 --> 00:30:20,347
  3485. Why don't you stop your
  3486. yammering and tell me the truth?
  3487.  
  3488. 792
  3489. 00:30:20,349 --> 00:30:21,482
  3490. I beg your pardon?
  3491.  
  3492. 793
  3493. 00:30:21,484 --> 00:30:22,750
  3494. What's really goin' on here?
  3495.  
  3496. 794
  3497. 00:30:22,752 --> 00:30:24,853
  3498. How much money are
  3499. they giving you?
  3500.  
  3501. 795
  3502. 00:30:24,855 --> 00:30:26,288
  3503. Or are you looking to fleece
  3504.  
  3505. 796
  3506. 00:30:26,290 --> 00:30:29,557
  3507. this kid's foster mom
  3508. out of her life savings?
  3509.  
  3510. 797
  3511. 00:30:29,559 --> 00:30:30,825
  3512. How dare you.
  3513.  
  3514. 798
  3515. 00:30:30,827 --> 00:30:32,560
  3516. What's goin' on?
  3517.  
  3518. 799
  3519. 00:30:32,562 --> 00:30:33,761
  3520. What's in it for you?
  3521.  
  3522. 800
  3523. 00:30:33,763 --> 00:30:34,828
  3524. The boy needed my help.
  3525.  
  3526. 801
  3527. 00:30:34,830 --> 00:30:36,533
  3528. Isn't that enough?
  3529.  
  3530. 802
  3531. 00:30:37,733 --> 00:30:39,800
  3532. For the record,
  3533. if I do find out
  3534.  
  3535. 803
  3536. 00:30:39,802 --> 00:30:41,903
  3537. that you're using that
  3538. kid for any reason,
  3539.  
  3540. 804
  3541. 00:30:41,905 --> 00:30:45,973
  3542. any reason at all, I'm gonna
  3543. beat the crap out of you.
  3544.  
  3545. 805
  3546. 00:30:45,975 --> 00:30:49,743
  3547. Aw, you're gonna give
  3548. me a knuckle sandwich?
  3549.  
  3550. 806
  3551. 00:30:49,745 --> 00:30:51,381
  3552. Whatever it takes.
  3553.  
  3554. 807
  3555. 00:30:52,316 --> 00:30:53,981
  3556. You call that a threat?
  3557.  
  3558. 808
  3559. 00:30:53,983 --> 00:30:54,585
  3560. Yeah.
  3561.  
  3562. 809
  3563. 00:30:55,851 --> 00:30:58,255
  3564. I am The Amazing Fabular.
  3565.  
  3566. 810
  3567. 00:30:59,556 --> 00:31:00,755
  3568. I've invoked the wrath
  3569.  
  3570. 811
  3571. 00:31:00,757 --> 00:31:03,924
  3572. of several hundred
  3573. loyal radio listeners.
  3574.  
  3575. 812
  3576. 00:31:03,926 --> 00:31:05,160
  3577. I've been threatened
  3578. by men the likes
  3579.  
  3580. 813
  3581. 00:31:05,162 --> 00:31:08,230
  3582. of which would leave you in
  3583. need of reconstructive surgery.
  3584.  
  3585. 814
  3586. 00:31:08,232 --> 00:31:11,232
  3587. What's amazing is
  3588. that reasonable people
  3589.  
  3590. 815
  3591. 00:31:11,234 --> 00:31:15,305
  3592. would actually take advice
  3593. from someone like you.
  3594.  
  3595. 816
  3596. 00:31:20,243 --> 00:31:22,544
  3597. Sorry to bother
  3598. you, but my father,
  3599.  
  3600. 817
  3601. 00:31:22,546 --> 00:31:24,011
  3602. he's a huge fan of your work
  3603.  
  3604. 818
  3605. 00:31:24,013 --> 00:31:25,913
  3606. and he said the
  3607. check's on the house
  3608.  
  3609. 819
  3610. 00:31:25,915 --> 00:31:28,717
  3611. if we could get your
  3612. autograph for the wall.
  3613.  
  3614. 820
  3615. 00:31:28,719 --> 00:31:29,550
  3616. Sure.
  3617.  
  3618. 821
  3619. 00:31:29,552 --> 00:31:31,952
  3620. I'd be delighted.
  3621.  
  3622. 822
  3623. 00:31:31,954 --> 00:31:34,021
  3624. What's your name?
  3625.  
  3626. 823
  3627. 00:31:34,023 --> 00:31:37,360
  3628. I'm sensing a D?
  3629.  
  3630. 824
  3631. 00:31:37,994 --> 00:31:39,760
  3632. Daisy.
  3633.  
  3634. 825
  3635. 00:31:39,762 --> 00:31:41,262
  3636. Wow!
  3637.  
  3638. 826
  3639. 00:31:41,264 --> 00:31:42,998
  3640. You're really good!
  3641.  
  3642. 827
  3643. 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,770
  3644. Your show is huge in Australia!
  3645.  
  3646. 828
  3647. 00:31:46,936 --> 00:31:49,570
  3648. I don't know if you
  3649. remember a guy named Mickey
  3650.  
  3651. 829
  3652. 00:31:49,572 --> 00:31:52,007
  3653. calling in about five years ago?
  3654.  
  3655. 830
  3656. 00:31:52,009 --> 00:31:53,674
  3657. Yeah, well, anyway, that
  3658. was my little brother
  3659.  
  3660. 831
  3661. 00:31:53,676 --> 00:31:57,612
  3662. and he had lost his
  3663. baby kangaroo, Skippy.
  3664.  
  3665. 832
  3666. 00:31:57,614 --> 00:31:58,646
  3667. Skippy!
  3668.  
  3669. 833
  3670. 00:31:58,648 --> 00:31:59,882
  3671. Yeah!
  3672.  
  3673. 834
  3674. 00:31:59,884 --> 00:32:02,284
  3675. So anyway, you said that he
  3676. missed his mum and hopped away
  3677.  
  3678. 835
  3679. 00:32:02,286 --> 00:32:03,852
  3680. and guess what?
  3681.  
  3682. 836
  3683. 00:32:03,854 --> 00:32:06,421
  3684. Five years later,
  3685. my brother called me
  3686.  
  3687. 837
  3688. 00:32:06,423 --> 00:32:07,989
  3689. and said that he found Skippy
  3690.  
  3691. 838
  3692. 00:32:07,991 --> 00:32:10,392
  3693. hopping in a field with his mum!
  3694.  
  3695. 839
  3696. 00:32:10,394 --> 00:32:11,862
  3697. Skippy, he's safe!
  3698.  
  3699. 840
  3700. 00:32:22,705 --> 00:32:23,707
  3701. Thank you!
  3702.  
  3703. 841
  3704. 00:32:26,409 --> 00:32:27,911
  3705. How's your nose?
  3706.  
  3707. 842
  3708. 00:32:31,647 --> 00:32:33,414
  3709. Let's keep moving down
  3710. the list, okay, Mason?
  3711.  
  3712. 843
  3713. 00:32:33,416 --> 00:32:35,383
  3714. All right, yeah.
  3715.  
  3716. 844
  3717. 00:32:35,385 --> 00:32:40,020
  3718. Well, Janice Bodicker?
  3719.  
  3720. 845
  3721. 00:32:40,022 --> 00:32:41,324
  3722. It's Bodicker.
  3723.  
  3724. 846
  3725. 00:32:42,626 --> 00:32:43,560
  3726. Bodicker?
  3727.  
  3728. 847
  3729. 00:32:45,628 --> 00:32:47,865
  3730. Kinda rolls off the tongue.
  3731.  
  3732. 848
  3733. 00:32:49,031 --> 00:32:49,833
  3734. Bodicker.
  3735.  
  3736. 849
  3737. 00:32:53,036 --> 00:32:54,038
  3738. Bodicker!
  3739.  
  3740. 850
  3741. 00:32:55,705 --> 00:32:56,506
  3742. Bodicker.
  3743.  
  3744. 851
  3745. 00:33:12,588 --> 00:33:13,654
  3746. Nick.
  3747.  
  3748. 852
  3749. 00:33:13,656 --> 00:33:15,723
  3750. - Janice.
  3751. - This is so exciting!
  3752.  
  3753. 853
  3754. 00:33:15,725 --> 00:33:17,358
  3755. The girls and I started
  3756. baking you a cake
  3757.  
  3758. 854
  3759. 00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:18,826
  3760. right after you called.
  3761.  
  3762. 855
  3763. 00:33:18,828 --> 00:33:20,095
  3764. That's so sweet.
  3765.  
  3766. 856
  3767. 00:33:20,097 --> 00:33:21,796
  3768. You didn't need to
  3769. go to the trouble.
  3770.  
  3771. 857
  3772. 00:33:21,798 --> 00:33:23,030
  3773. Oh, no trouble at all.
  3774.  
  3775. 858
  3776. 00:33:23,032 --> 00:33:25,032
  3777. The girls just love
  3778. when we have company.
  3779.  
  3780. 859
  3781. 00:33:25,034 --> 00:33:25,935
  3782. Come on in.
  3783.  
  3784. 860
  3785. 00:33:30,639 --> 00:33:31,474
  3786. Okay!
  3787.  
  3788. 861
  3789. 00:33:32,876 --> 00:33:35,977
  3790. Why don't you all just
  3791. get yourselves acquainted?
  3792.  
  3793. 862
  3794. 00:33:35,979 --> 00:33:37,014
  3795. Be nice, Donna.
  3796.  
  3797. 863
  3798. 00:33:39,014 --> 00:33:40,917
  3799. And I'll be right back.
  3800.  
  3801. 864
  3802. 00:33:44,087 --> 00:33:45,854
  3803. I think I wanna
  3804. wait in the car.
  3805.  
  3806. 865
  3807. 00:33:45,856 --> 00:33:47,989
  3808. Me too, it's so
  3809. stuffy in here.
  3810.  
  3811. 866
  3812. 00:33:47,991 --> 00:33:49,156
  3813. And creepy.
  3814.  
  3815. 867
  3816. 00:33:49,158 --> 00:33:53,597
  3817. You boys must be thirsty.
  3818.  
  3819. 868
  3820. 00:33:55,132 --> 00:33:59,403
  3821. The one with the strawberry
  3822. in it is yours, Nick.
  3823.  
  3824. 869
  3825. 00:34:08,544 --> 00:34:09,613
  3826. To true love.
  3827.  
  3828. 870
  3829. 00:34:11,448 --> 00:34:12,083
  3830. Cheers!
  3831.  
  3832. 871
  3833. 00:34:13,149 --> 00:34:14,050
  3834. Bottoms up!
  3835.  
  3836. 872
  3837. 00:34:23,861 --> 00:34:27,028
  3838. Well, okay, so I'm just
  3839. gonna get right to it.
  3840.  
  3841. 873
  3842. 00:34:27,030 --> 00:34:31,102
  3843. We came here to ask you
  3844. something really important.
  3845.  
  3846. 874
  3847. 00:34:33,437 --> 00:34:34,071
  3848. Nick!
  3849.  
  3850. 875
  3851. 00:34:35,805 --> 00:34:40,110
  3852. I knew that you were here
  3853. for more than just a... visit.
  3854.  
  3855. 876
  3856. 00:34:44,046 --> 00:34:45,882
  3857. Did you and I have...
  3858.  
  3859. 877
  3860. 00:34:47,050 --> 00:34:48,515
  3861. Say it, say it,
  3862. say it, say it!
  3863.  
  3864. 878
  3865. 00:34:48,517 --> 00:34:49,149
  3866. Just ask, ask, ask, ask, ask...
  3867.  
  3868. 879
  3869. 00:34:49,151 --> 00:34:50,551
  3870. Did you?
  3871.  
  3872. 880
  3873. 00:34:56,926 --> 00:34:59,162
  3874. A child together?
  3875.  
  3876. 881
  3877. 00:35:01,198 --> 00:35:02,830
  3878. Of course we did, Nick.
  3879.  
  3880. 882
  3881. 00:35:02,832 --> 00:35:03,666
  3882. We did?
  3883.  
  3884. 883
  3885. 00:35:04,667 --> 00:35:06,667
  3886. That's why I've kept
  3887. up on all your success.
  3888.  
  3889. 884
  3890. 00:35:06,669 --> 00:35:10,238
  3891. I wanted him to be
  3892. proud of his daddy.
  3893.  
  3894. 885
  3895. 00:35:10,240 --> 00:35:12,540
  3896. I knew we'd all be
  3897. together again someday.
  3898.  
  3899. 886
  3900. 00:35:12,542 --> 00:35:14,475
  3901. Oh, god, this is the moment!
  3902.  
  3903. 887
  3904. 00:35:14,477 --> 00:35:15,412
  3905. Okay, whoo!
  3906.  
  3907. 888
  3908. 00:35:19,615 --> 00:35:21,951
  3909. Nicky, say hi to your daddy!
  3910.  
  3911. 889
  3912. 00:35:25,222 --> 00:35:27,689
  3913. We all think he
  3914. looks just like you.
  3915.  
  3916. 890
  3917. 00:35:27,691 --> 00:35:30,694
  3918. It's like, is it
  3919. big Nick or little?
  3920.  
  3921. 891
  3922. 00:35:32,095 --> 00:35:36,600
  3923. Well, go on, just aren't you
  3924. gonna say hi to your son, Nick?
  3925.  
  3926. 892
  3927. 00:35:38,133 --> 00:35:39,169
  3928. Hi?
  3929.  
  3930. 893
  3931. 00:35:44,006 --> 00:35:46,975
  3932. Okay, I'll just
  3933. be a moment, okay!
  3934.  
  3935. 894
  3936. 00:35:46,977 --> 00:35:48,209
  3937. I'll let you guys talk.
  3938.  
  3939. 895
  3940. 00:35:48,211 --> 00:35:49,276
  3941. He's gonna cheer you up.
  3942.  
  3943. 896
  3944. 00:35:49,278 --> 00:35:51,279
  3945. Okay, just let him get settled.
  3946.  
  3947. 897
  3948. 00:35:51,281 --> 00:35:53,548
  3949. One second, one second.
  3950.  
  3951. 898
  3952. 00:35:53,550 --> 00:35:54,781
  3953. I'm gonna go
  3954. out on a limb here
  3955.  
  3956. 899
  3957. 00:35:54,783 --> 00:35:56,517
  3958. and say that she
  3959. is batshit crazy.
  3960.  
  3961. 900
  3962. 00:35:56,519 --> 00:35:57,185
  3963. We gotta get
  3964. out of this place.
  3965.  
  3966. 901
  3967. 00:35:57,187 --> 00:35:58,653
  3968. She is not the one you seek.
  3969.  
  3970. 902
  3971. 00:35:58,655 --> 00:35:59,587
  3972. What about the cake?
  3973.  
  3974. 903
  3975. 00:35:59,589 --> 00:36:00,587
  3976. Are you kidding me?
  3977.  
  3978. 904
  3979. 00:36:00,589 --> 00:36:01,788
  3980. I'm starving.
  3981.  
  3982. 905
  3983. 00:36:01,790 --> 00:36:04,892
  3984. I'm just
  3985. adding the nuts!
  3986.  
  3987. 906
  3988. 00:36:04,894 --> 00:36:05,727
  3989. Mr. Sparkles!
  3990.  
  3991. 907
  3992. 00:36:05,729 --> 00:36:06,694
  3993. Oh!
  3994.  
  3995. 908
  3996. 00:36:07,631 --> 00:36:09,263
  3997. You are in trouble, young man.
  3998.  
  3999. 909
  4000. 00:36:09,265 --> 00:36:12,869
  4001. You scared the living
  4002. daylights outta me!
  4003.  
  4004. 910
  4005. 00:36:13,736 --> 00:36:14,571
  4006. Oh no!
  4007.  
  4008. 911
  4009. 00:36:15,906 --> 00:36:17,071
  4010. This is bad.
  4011.  
  4012. 912
  4013. 00:36:17,073 --> 00:36:18,006
  4014. Oh, shoot!
  4015.  
  4016. 913
  4017. 00:36:18,008 --> 00:36:20,511
  4018. What did you do to my girls?
  4019.  
  4020. 914
  4021. 00:36:23,078 --> 00:36:24,111
  4022. Oh, god!
  4023.  
  4024. 915
  4025. 00:36:24,113 --> 00:36:25,747
  4026. Bonnie, are you okay?
  4027.  
  4028. 916
  4029. 00:36:25,749 --> 00:36:27,147
  4030. I'm terribly sorry
  4031.  
  4032. 917
  4033. 00:36:27,149 --> 00:36:27,948
  4034. - about this, ma'am.
  4035. - I'm calling the police!
  4036.  
  4037. 918
  4038. 00:36:27,950 --> 00:36:29,283
  4039. You assaulted my girls!
  4040.  
  4041. 919
  4042. 00:36:29,285 --> 00:36:30,218
  4043. Is there any way I could take
  4044.  
  4045. 920
  4046. 00:36:30,220 --> 00:36:32,120
  4047. a piece of that for the road?
  4048.  
  4049. 921
  4050. 00:36:32,122 --> 00:36:34,555
  4051. Get out, get out, get out!
  4052.  
  4053. 922
  4054. 00:36:34,557 --> 00:36:35,323
  4055. - That's okay.
  4056. - Get out!
  4057.  
  4058. 923
  4059. 00:36:35,325 --> 00:36:36,256
  4060. - Sorry, Amanda!
  4061. - Thank you!
  4062.  
  4063. 924
  4064. 00:36:36,258 --> 00:36:37,125
  4065. Good to see ya, take care!
  4066.  
  4067. 925
  4068. 00:36:37,127 --> 00:36:37,962
  4069. Hey, no!
  4070.  
  4071. 926
  4072. 00:36:38,961 --> 00:36:40,261
  4073. That went horribly wrong.
  4074.  
  4075. 927
  4076. 00:36:40,263 --> 00:36:41,995
  4077. Does this make
  4078. Nicky my stepbrother?
  4079.  
  4080. 928
  4081. 00:36:41,997 --> 00:36:42,964
  4082. Oh, that's very
  4083. funny, cake face.
  4084.  
  4085. 929
  4086. 00:36:42,966 --> 00:36:44,299
  4087. Get in the car.
  4088.  
  4089. 930
  4090. 00:36:44,301 --> 00:36:46,066
  4091. I told you she wasn't
  4092. the one you seek.
  4093.  
  4094. 931
  4095. 00:36:46,068 --> 00:36:47,301
  4096. Perhaps now you won't
  4097. be so quick to dismiss
  4098.  
  4099. 932
  4100. 00:36:47,303 --> 00:36:48,303
  4101. the gifts of others?
  4102.  
  4103. 933
  4104. 00:36:48,305 --> 00:36:49,770
  4105. Gift, my ass!
  4106.  
  4107. 934
  4108. 00:36:49,772 --> 00:36:51,104
  4109. That falls under the
  4110. category of obvious.
  4111.  
  4112. 935
  4113. 00:36:51,106 --> 00:36:52,040
  4114. Gimme the keys.
  4115.  
  4116. 936
  4117. 00:36:52,042 --> 00:36:52,906
  4118. You drive like an old lady.
  4119.  
  4120. 937
  4121. 00:36:52,908 --> 00:36:53,975
  4122. Very well.
  4123.  
  4124. 938
  4125. 00:36:53,977 --> 00:36:55,877
  4126. The gift needs to power down.
  4127.  
  4128. 939
  4129. 00:36:55,879 --> 00:36:57,078
  4130. Can you power down that shirt?
  4131.  
  4132. 940
  4133. 00:36:57,080 --> 00:36:58,249
  4134. It's giving me a headache.
  4135.  
  4136. 941
  4137. 00:37:03,953 --> 00:37:05,218
  4138. Two down, a few more to go.
  4139.  
  4140. 942
  4141. 00:37:06,856 --> 00:37:09,756
  4142. Are you really gonna
  4143. leave without saying goodbye
  4144.  
  4145. 943
  4146. 00:37:09,758 --> 00:37:11,761
  4147. again, Nick?
  4148.  
  4149. 944
  4150. 00:37:12,062 --> 00:37:13,294
  4151. Is that a flame thrower?
  4152.  
  4153. 945
  4154. 00:37:13,296 --> 00:37:15,296
  4155. Where'd she get
  4156. a flame thrower?
  4157.  
  4158. 946
  4159. 00:37:15,298 --> 00:37:16,930
  4160. Drive!
  4161.  
  4162. 947
  4163. 00:37:51,401 --> 00:37:52,633
  4164. I'm not ready to die!
  4165.  
  4166. 948
  4167. 00:37:52,635 --> 00:37:54,137
  4168. I don't wanna die!
  4169.  
  4170. 949
  4171. 00:37:58,207 --> 00:37:59,774
  4172. Hey,
  4173. what do you think?
  4174.  
  4175. 950
  4176. 00:37:59,776 --> 00:38:00,778
  4177. It's great.
  4178.  
  4179. 951
  4180. 00:38:02,312 --> 00:38:04,712
  4181. What's that look all about?
  4182.  
  4183. 952
  4184. 00:38:04,714 --> 00:38:06,913
  4185. All right, I hate to be the
  4186. one to say, I told you so.
  4187.  
  4188. 953
  4189. 00:38:06,915 --> 00:38:10,417
  4190. I think you love being the
  4191. one to say I told you so.
  4192.  
  4193. 954
  4194. 00:38:10,419 --> 00:38:11,519
  4195. Okay, yeah.
  4196.  
  4197. 955
  4198. 00:38:11,521 --> 00:38:14,421
  4199. Fine, that's true but I
  4200. only do this to protect you.
  4201.  
  4202. 956
  4203. 00:38:14,423 --> 00:38:16,290
  4204. I don't need to be
  4205. protected from Nick.
  4206.  
  4207. 957
  4208. 00:38:16,292 --> 00:38:17,725
  4209. Really?
  4210.  
  4211. 958
  4212. 00:38:17,727 --> 00:38:19,026
  4213. Well, I just got off
  4214. the phone with Albert.
  4215.  
  4216. 959
  4217. 00:38:19,028 --> 00:38:20,395
  4218. Albert, Nick's publisher?
  4219.  
  4220. 960
  4221. 00:38:20,397 --> 00:38:22,162
  4222. It had to be done.
  4223.  
  4224. 961
  4225. 00:38:22,164 --> 00:38:24,332
  4226. And when I mentioned him
  4227. booking Nick last minute,
  4228.  
  4229. 962
  4230. 00:38:24,334 --> 00:38:26,868
  4231. he had no idea what
  4232. I was talking about.
  4233.  
  4234. 963
  4235. 00:38:26,870 --> 00:38:29,736
  4236. Kelly, can't you just
  4237. be, wait, what, what?
  4238.  
  4239. 964
  4240. 00:38:29,738 --> 00:38:33,743
  4241. There is no Santa Barbara
  4242. speaking engagement.
  4243.  
  4244. 965
  4245. 00:38:34,810 --> 00:38:38,245
  4246. But why would he tell me that?
  4247.  
  4248. 966
  4249. 00:38:38,247 --> 00:38:39,082
  4250. Exactly.
  4251.  
  4252. 967
  4253. 00:38:53,363 --> 00:38:54,796
  4254. Oh, wait.
  4255.  
  4256. 968
  4257. 00:38:54,798 --> 00:38:55,729
  4258. What are
  4259. you looking for?
  4260.  
  4261. 969
  4262. 00:38:55,731 --> 00:38:57,365
  4263. I lost my phone.
  4264.  
  4265. 970
  4266. 00:38:57,367 --> 00:38:58,433
  4267. I think you left it
  4268. on the coffee table
  4269.  
  4270. 971
  4271. 00:38:58,435 --> 00:39:01,736
  4272. of the house of your true
  4273. love, Janice Bodicker.
  4274.  
  4275. 972
  4276. 00:39:01,738 --> 00:39:03,004
  4277. Shall we go back and get her?
  4278.  
  4279. 973
  4280. 00:39:03,006 --> 00:39:04,404
  4281. Never mind, I got insurance.
  4282.  
  4283. 974
  4284. 00:39:04,406 --> 00:39:06,073
  4285. Did you say this one
  4286. is called Winifred?
  4287.  
  4288. 975
  4289. 00:39:06,075 --> 00:39:07,908
  4290. Yeah, Winny for short.
  4291.  
  4292. 976
  4293. 00:39:07,910 --> 00:39:10,778
  4294. I'm sensing a
  4295. very peculiar aura.
  4296.  
  4297. 977
  4298. 00:39:10,780 --> 00:39:12,245
  4299. No, that's your rat.
  4300.  
  4301. 978
  4302. 00:39:12,247 --> 00:39:16,686
  4303. Ever since you fed him that
  4304. chimichanga from the Gas 'N Go.
  4305.  
  4306. 979
  4307. 00:39:17,787 --> 00:39:18,486
  4308. No, this is
  4309. something different.
  4310.  
  4311. 980
  4312. 00:39:18,488 --> 00:39:20,190
  4313. Wait right here.
  4314.  
  4315. 981
  4316. 00:39:27,397 --> 00:39:29,964
  4317. Is Winifred Cartwright here?
  4318.  
  4319. 982
  4320. 00:39:29,966 --> 00:39:31,131
  4321. Nick?
  4322.  
  4323. 983
  4324. 00:39:31,133 --> 00:39:32,866
  4325. Nick Pearson, come here!
  4326.  
  4327. 984
  4328. 00:39:32,868 --> 00:39:34,435
  4329. Whoa, do I know you, buddy?
  4330.  
  4331. 985
  4332. 00:39:34,437 --> 00:39:36,707
  4333. Yes, it's me, it's Winny!
  4334.  
  4335. 986
  4336. 00:39:38,475 --> 00:39:39,973
  4337. Of course, I go by Freddy now.
  4338.  
  4339. 987
  4340. 00:39:39,975 --> 00:39:41,444
  4341. It's less confusing.
  4342.  
  4343. 988
  4344. 00:39:44,914 --> 00:39:47,881
  4345. How long you
  4346. been Freddy, Winny?
  4347.  
  4348. 989
  4349. 00:39:47,883 --> 00:39:50,383
  4350. Well, you know, you and
  4351. I had that night together
  4352.  
  4353. 990
  4354. 00:39:50,385 --> 00:39:53,287
  4355. and then the next day
  4356. I went and had surgery.
  4357.  
  4358. 991
  4359. 00:39:53,289 --> 00:39:54,957
  4360. I don't blame you.
  4361.  
  4362. 992
  4363. 00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:00,461
  4364. I cannot believe I let you
  4365. get into my head like this.
  4366.  
  4367. 993
  4368. 00:40:00,463 --> 00:40:02,162
  4369. Then just call him, Syd.
  4370.  
  4371. 994
  4372. 00:40:02,164 --> 00:40:03,363
  4373. I don't need to...
  4374.  
  4375. 995
  4376. 00:40:03,365 --> 00:40:04,265
  4377. That way you'll
  4378. know what's going on.
  4379.  
  4380. 996
  4381. 00:40:04,267 --> 00:40:06,234
  4382. And you're right,
  4383. maybe it's nothing.
  4384.  
  4385. 997
  4386. 00:40:06,236 --> 00:40:07,468
  4387. It's probably nothing.
  4388.  
  4389. 998
  4390. 00:40:07,470 --> 00:40:11,339
  4391. I mean, I bet it is,
  4392. it's something but.
  4393.  
  4394. 999
  4395. 00:40:11,341 --> 00:40:14,075
  4396. What, it could be nothing.
  4397.  
  4398. 1000
  4399. 00:40:14,077 --> 00:40:14,912
  4400. Okay.
  4401.  
  4402. 1001
  4403. 00:40:21,517 --> 00:40:22,549
  4404. Hello?
  4405.  
  4406. 1002
  4407. 00:40:22,551 --> 00:40:24,519
  4408. I'm sorry, who
  4409. am I speaking to?
  4410.  
  4411. 1003
  4412. 00:40:24,521 --> 00:40:26,187
  4413. None of your
  4414. business, that's who!
  4415.  
  4416. 1004
  4417. 00:40:26,189 --> 00:40:28,221
  4418. Well, can I speak to Nick?
  4419.  
  4420. 1005
  4421. 00:40:28,223 --> 00:40:29,156
  4422. No, you may not!
  4423.  
  4424. 1006
  4425. 00:40:29,158 --> 00:40:30,558
  4426. He's gone again with no regards
  4427.  
  4428. 1007
  4429. 00:40:30,560 --> 00:40:32,526
  4430. for my feelings or his child!
  4431.  
  4432. 1008
  4433. 00:40:32,528 --> 00:40:33,560
  4434. His child?
  4435.  
  4436. 1009
  4437. 00:40:33,562 --> 00:40:35,229
  4438. What?
  4439.  
  4440. 1010
  4441. 00:40:35,231 --> 00:40:36,531
  4442. I'm sorry.
  4443.  
  4444. 1011
  4445. 00:40:36,533 --> 00:40:37,531
  4446. Are you saying that
  4447. you and Nick Pearson
  4448.  
  4449. 1012
  4450. 00:40:37,533 --> 00:40:39,533
  4451. had a child together?
  4452.  
  4453. 1013
  4454. 00:40:39,535 --> 00:40:40,968
  4455. Yes, we did.
  4456.  
  4457. 1014
  4458. 00:40:40,970 --> 00:40:42,403
  4459. A beautiful baby boy.
  4460.  
  4461. 1015
  4462. 00:40:42,405 --> 00:40:46,006
  4463. I now regret ever having
  4464. laid eyes on that man!
  4465.  
  4466. 1016
  4467. 00:40:46,008 --> 00:40:48,042
  4468. When he wrote that book,
  4469. that hating kids book,
  4470.  
  4471. 1017
  4472. 00:40:48,044 --> 00:40:49,810
  4473. I thought he was
  4474. just being funny
  4475.  
  4476. 1018
  4477. 00:40:49,812 --> 00:40:53,513
  4478. but I now know that every
  4479. word of it was the truth.
  4480.  
  4481. 1019
  4482. 00:40:53,515 --> 00:40:55,482
  4483. Where is Nick right now?
  4484.  
  4485. 1020
  4486. 00:40:55,484 --> 00:40:57,051
  4487. Hopefully lying
  4488. dead in a ditch
  4489.  
  4490. 1021
  4491. 00:40:57,053 --> 00:40:58,986
  4492. with his two friends while
  4493. that little dog of theirs
  4494.  
  4495. 1022
  4496. 00:40:58,988 --> 00:41:00,821
  4497. just eats their remains!
  4498.  
  4499. 1023
  4500. 00:41:00,823 --> 00:41:01,823
  4501. He hates dogs.
  4502.  
  4503. 1024
  4504. 00:41:01,825 --> 00:41:02,924
  4505. What?
  4506.  
  4507. 1025
  4508. 00:41:02,926 --> 00:41:05,192
  4509. My advice to you is to
  4510. stay as far away as possible
  4511.  
  4512. 1026
  4513. 00:41:05,194 --> 00:41:06,796
  4514. from that deadbeat!
  4515.  
  4516. 1027
  4517. 00:41:08,497 --> 00:41:10,198
  4518. Okay, what is going on?
  4519.  
  4520. 1028
  4521. 00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:12,500
  4522. I think it's pretty clear.
  4523.  
  4524. 1029
  4525. 00:41:12,502 --> 00:41:15,569
  4526. I mean, that woman, she does
  4527. not sound normal, and a dog?
  4528.  
  4529. 1030
  4530. 00:41:15,571 --> 00:41:19,173
  4531. Syd, first some kid shows
  4532. up claiming he's Nick's son
  4533.  
  4534. 1031
  4535. 00:41:19,175 --> 00:41:20,374
  4536. then Nick lies about
  4537. where he is going
  4538.  
  4539. 1032
  4540. 00:41:20,376 --> 00:41:25,479
  4541. and now, this weird woman
  4542. admits they had a kid together.
  4543.  
  4544. 1033
  4545. 00:41:25,481 --> 00:41:26,379
  4546. What more do you need?
  4547.  
  4548. 1034
  4549. 00:41:26,381 --> 00:41:27,348
  4550. It's case closed.
  4551.  
  4552. 1035
  4553. 00:41:27,350 --> 00:41:28,850
  4554. I don't think so, Kelly.
  4555.  
  4556. 1036
  4557. 00:41:28,852 --> 00:41:30,183
  4558. I need proof.
  4559.  
  4560. 1037
  4561. 00:41:30,185 --> 00:41:32,021
  4562. Wow, okay.
  4563.  
  4564. 1038
  4565. 00:41:32,622 --> 00:41:34,354
  4566. Somebody's in denial.
  4567.  
  4568. 1039
  4569. 00:41:34,356 --> 00:41:36,192
  4570. Fine, we'll get proof.
  4571.  
  4572. 1040
  4573. 00:41:53,910 --> 00:41:55,308
  4574. I don't understand.
  4575.  
  4576. 1041
  4577. 00:41:55,310 --> 00:41:57,611
  4578. If Winny is Freddy,
  4579. why were you asking him
  4580.  
  4581. 1042
  4582. 00:41:57,613 --> 00:42:00,247
  4583. if he had your child?
  4584.  
  4585. 1043
  4586. 00:42:00,249 --> 00:42:03,250
  4587. Because he used to be a woman.
  4588.  
  4589. 1044
  4590. 00:42:03,252 --> 00:42:05,421
  4591. Wow, how do you do that?
  4592.  
  4593. 1045
  4594. 00:42:08,658 --> 00:42:09,890
  4595. You have any hobbies?
  4596.  
  4597. 1046
  4598. 00:42:09,892 --> 00:42:12,493
  4599. You like reading
  4600. books or anything?
  4601.  
  4602. 1047
  4603. 00:42:12,495 --> 00:42:15,229
  4604. Sometimes, I read your book.
  4605.  
  4606. 1048
  4607. 00:42:15,231 --> 00:42:16,596
  4608. Really, what'd you think?
  4609.  
  4610. 1049
  4611. 00:42:16,598 --> 00:42:17,899
  4612. It made me wanna write a book.
  4613.  
  4614. 1050
  4615. 00:42:17,901 --> 00:42:19,000
  4616. No way!
  4617.  
  4618. 1051
  4619. 00:42:19,002 --> 00:42:20,267
  4620. That is so cool.
  4621.  
  4622. 1052
  4623. 00:42:20,269 --> 00:42:22,904
  4624. I'm so thrilled I could
  4625. inspire a young writer.
  4626.  
  4627. 1053
  4628. 00:42:22,906 --> 00:42:25,538
  4629. I wanted to write a book
  4630. called I Hate Parents.
  4631.  
  4632. 1054
  4633. 00:42:25,540 --> 00:42:26,175
  4634. Oh.
  4635.  
  4636. 1055
  4637. 00:42:29,611 --> 00:42:31,678
  4638. So, what is that thing anyway?
  4639.  
  4640. 1056
  4641. 00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:33,446
  4642. It's a fidget spinner.
  4643.  
  4644. 1057
  4645. 00:42:33,448 --> 00:42:34,582
  4646. It helps keep me calm.
  4647.  
  4648. 1058
  4649. 00:42:34,584 --> 00:42:35,515
  4650. Oh, yeah?
  4651.  
  4652. 1059
  4653. 00:42:35,517 --> 00:42:36,549
  4654. I could use one of those.
  4655.  
  4656. 1060
  4657. 00:42:36,551 --> 00:42:38,451
  4658. Look, you don't
  4659. have to do this.
  4660.  
  4661. 1061
  4662. 00:42:38,453 --> 00:42:39,654
  4663. What?
  4664.  
  4665. 1062
  4666. 00:42:39,656 --> 00:42:42,189
  4667. Pretend like you like me.
  4668.  
  4669. 1063
  4670. 00:42:42,191 --> 00:42:44,294
  4671. Just help me find my mom.
  4672.  
  4673. 1064
  4674. 00:42:45,361 --> 00:42:47,297
  4675. That's the deal, right?
  4676.  
  4677. 1065
  4678. 00:42:52,068 --> 00:42:54,669
  4679. So why do you hate kids?
  4680.  
  4681. 1066
  4682. 00:42:54,671 --> 00:42:56,169
  4683. I don't hate kids.
  4684.  
  4685. 1067
  4686. 00:42:56,171 --> 00:42:58,471
  4687. I just don't see eye
  4688. to eye with them.
  4689.  
  4690. 1068
  4691. 00:42:58,473 --> 00:43:00,941
  4692. It's not so much that I
  4693. hate them, they hate me.
  4694.  
  4695. 1069
  4696. 00:43:00,943 --> 00:43:02,345
  4697. I don't hate you.
  4698.  
  4699. 1070
  4700. 00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:06,613
  4701. Does your fiancee
  4702. hate kids, too?
  4703.  
  4704. 1071
  4705. 00:43:06,615 --> 00:43:10,119
  4706. No, she just likes
  4707. things uncomplicated.
  4708.  
  4709. 1072
  4710. 00:43:11,421 --> 00:43:14,721
  4711. Why are there spoons
  4712. in my comforter?
  4713.  
  4714. 1073
  4715. 00:43:14,723 --> 00:43:16,290
  4716. All the butter's gone.
  4717.  
  4718. 1074
  4719. 00:43:16,292 --> 00:43:18,658
  4720. What am I gonna
  4721. dip my shrimp in?
  4722.  
  4723. 1075
  4724. 00:43:18,660 --> 00:43:20,261
  4725. What's he dreaming about?
  4726.  
  4727. 1076
  4728. 00:43:20,263 --> 00:43:23,934
  4729. Sounds like he's
  4730. channeling Gordon Ramsay.
  4731.  
  4732. 1077
  4733. 00:43:29,671 --> 00:43:30,907
  4734. Oh, great.
  4735.  
  4736. 1078
  4737. 00:43:52,495 --> 00:43:53,995
  4738. License and registration.
  4739.  
  4740. 1079
  4741. 00:43:53,997 --> 00:43:56,430
  4742. Yes, certainly, officer.
  4743.  
  4744. 1080
  4745. 00:43:56,432 --> 00:43:57,999
  4746. You know why I
  4747. pulled you over?
  4748.  
  4749. 1081
  4750. 00:43:58,001 --> 00:43:59,299
  4751. Was I going too fast?
  4752.  
  4753. 1082
  4754. 00:43:59,301 --> 00:44:00,567
  4755. The speed limit is 45.
  4756.  
  4757. 1083
  4758. 00:44:00,569 --> 00:44:02,069
  4759. You were doing 50.
  4760.  
  4761. 1084
  4762. 00:44:05,274 --> 00:44:06,473
  4763. This is not my car
  4764.  
  4765. 1085
  4766. 00:44:06,475 --> 00:44:09,709
  4767. so I'm not really used
  4768. to how it handles.
  4769.  
  4770. 1086
  4771. 00:44:09,711 --> 00:44:10,544
  4772. It pulls.
  4773.  
  4774. 1087
  4775. 00:44:10,546 --> 00:44:12,178
  4776. Well, that doesn't
  4777. change the fact
  4778.  
  4779. 1088
  4780. 00:44:12,180 --> 00:44:13,113
  4781. that you were breaking
  4782. the law, now does it?
  4783.  
  4784. 1089
  4785. 00:44:13,115 --> 00:44:13,714
  4786. No, no, no, it doesn't.
  4787.  
  4788. 1090
  4789. 00:44:13,716 --> 00:44:16,316
  4790. Excuse me, officer.
  4791.  
  4792. 1091
  4793. 00:44:16,318 --> 00:44:17,785
  4794. When was the last time
  4795. you had your radar gun
  4796.  
  4797. 1092
  4798. 00:44:17,787 --> 00:44:20,220
  4799. calibrated for accuracy?
  4800.  
  4801. 1093
  4802. 00:44:20,222 --> 00:44:21,654
  4803. Excuse me?
  4804.  
  4805. 1094
  4806. 00:44:21,656 --> 00:44:24,058
  4807. Well, you see, many speeding
  4808. violations are dismissed
  4809.  
  4810. 1095
  4811. 00:44:24,060 --> 00:44:25,258
  4812. because the citing officer
  4813.  
  4814. 1096
  4815. 00:44:25,260 --> 00:44:26,794
  4816. failed to have regular
  4817. maintenance checks
  4818.  
  4819. 1097
  4820. 00:44:26,796 --> 00:44:28,397
  4821. on their equipment.
  4822.  
  4823. 1098
  4824. 00:44:32,100 --> 00:44:34,671
  4825. Don't move, I'll
  4826. be right back.
  4827.  
  4828. 1099
  4829. 00:44:37,740 --> 00:44:38,638
  4830. What are you doing?
  4831.  
  4832. 1100
  4833. 00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:40,040
  4834. Helping.
  4835.  
  4836. 1101
  4837. 00:44:40,042 --> 00:44:41,542
  4838. My foster mother used
  4839. to be a paralegal
  4840.  
  4841. 1102
  4842. 00:44:41,544 --> 00:44:43,477
  4843. for the law firm of
  4844. Dewey, Cheatem & Howe.
  4845.  
  4846. 1103
  4847. 00:44:43,479 --> 00:44:46,647
  4848. No, Mason, that law
  4849. firm doesn't exist.
  4850.  
  4851. 1104
  4852. 00:44:46,649 --> 00:44:47,580
  4853. It's an old joke.
  4854.  
  4855. 1105
  4856. 00:44:47,582 --> 00:44:49,986
  4857. I know, I was making a joke.
  4858.  
  4859. 1106
  4860. 00:44:51,220 --> 00:44:52,055
  4861. Oh.
  4862.  
  4863. 1107
  4864. 00:44:54,823 --> 00:44:57,158
  4865. I don't know about the
  4866. timing but pretty funny.
  4867.  
  4868. 1108
  4869. 00:44:57,160 --> 00:44:58,192
  4870. All right, Mr. Pearson,
  4871.  
  4872. 1109
  4873. 00:44:58,194 --> 00:44:59,826
  4874. I'm gonna let you go
  4875. with a warning this time.
  4876.  
  4877. 1110
  4878. 00:44:59,828 --> 00:45:00,794
  4879. Watch your speed.
  4880.  
  4881. 1111
  4882. 00:45:00,796 --> 00:45:02,629
  4883. Thank you.
  4884.  
  4885. 1112
  4886. 00:45:02,631 --> 00:45:03,564
  4887. And one more thing.
  4888.  
  4889. 1113
  4890. 00:45:03,566 --> 00:45:04,698
  4891. Mm-hmm?
  4892.  
  4893. 1114
  4894. 00:45:04,700 --> 00:45:05,832
  4895. Hey, brother,
  4896. can I have your autograph?
  4897.  
  4898. 1115
  4899. 00:45:05,834 --> 00:45:07,634
  4900. I'd be happy to, always.
  4901.  
  4902. 1116
  4903. 00:45:07,636 --> 00:45:08,836
  4904. Man, my wife and I,
  4905.  
  4906. 1117
  4907. 00:45:08,838 --> 00:45:12,506
  4908. we listen to you on
  4909. the radio all the time.
  4910.  
  4911. 1118
  4912. 00:45:12,508 --> 00:45:15,709
  4913. You have admirable
  4914. qualities, officer.
  4915.  
  4916. 1119
  4917. 00:45:15,711 --> 00:45:17,578
  4918. I'm sensing a promotion
  4919. in your future.
  4920.  
  4921. 1120
  4922. 00:45:17,580 --> 00:45:19,080
  4923. Well, actually, I'm puttin' in
  4924.  
  4925. 1121
  4926. 00:45:19,082 --> 00:45:20,080
  4927. for early retirement
  4928. in three months.
  4929.  
  4930. 1122
  4931. 00:45:20,082 --> 00:45:22,750
  4932. Yes, which will promote
  4933. healthy relaxation
  4934.  
  4935. 1123
  4936. 00:45:22,752 --> 00:45:24,685
  4937. in your previously hectic life.
  4938.  
  4939. 1124
  4940. 00:45:26,122 --> 00:45:29,292
  4941. You can say that
  4942. again, Mr. Fabular.
  4943.  
  4944. 1125
  4945. 00:45:30,193 --> 00:45:31,125
  4946. All right, man.
  4947.  
  4948. 1126
  4949. 00:45:31,127 --> 00:45:32,392
  4950. Hey, you drive safely now.
  4951.  
  4952. 1127
  4953. 00:45:32,394 --> 00:45:34,694
  4954. - All right.
  4955. - Of course, of course.
  4956.  
  4957. 1128
  4958. 00:45:34,696 --> 00:45:36,633
  4959. You watch your speed.
  4960.  
  4961. 1129
  4962. 00:45:39,234 --> 00:45:40,234
  4963. No need to thank me.
  4964.  
  4965. 1130
  4966. 00:45:40,236 --> 00:45:40,868
  4967. Thank you?
  4968.  
  4969. 1131
  4970. 00:45:40,870 --> 00:45:42,336
  4971. For what?
  4972.  
  4973. 1132
  4974. 00:45:42,338 --> 00:45:43,270
  4975. For extruding us
  4976. from that awkward
  4977.  
  4978. 1133
  4979. 00:45:43,272 --> 00:45:44,872
  4980. and embarrassing confrontation.
  4981.  
  4982. 1134
  4983. 00:45:44,874 --> 00:45:46,540
  4984. You had nothing to do with it.
  4985.  
  4986. 1135
  4987. 00:45:46,542 --> 00:45:48,109
  4988. I most certainly had
  4989. everything to do with it.
  4990.  
  4991. 1136
  4992. 00:45:48,111 --> 00:45:51,745
  4993. I was manipulating and
  4994. deflecting his negative energy.
  4995.  
  4996. 1137
  4997. 00:45:51,747 --> 00:45:53,180
  4998. Thank you, Fabular.
  4999.  
  5000. 1138
  5001. 00:45:53,182 --> 00:45:54,448
  5002. Yeah, thank you, Master Yoda.
  5003.  
  5004. 1139
  5005. 00:45:54,450 --> 00:45:55,381
  5006. Now shut up, please.
  5007.  
  5008. 1140
  5009. 00:45:55,383 --> 00:45:57,317
  5010. Who's next on the list?
  5011.  
  5012. 1141
  5013. 00:45:57,319 --> 00:45:59,720
  5014. Christine Hurley.
  5015.  
  5016. 1142
  5017. 00:46:06,194 --> 00:46:07,361
  5018. Do you see anything?
  5019.  
  5020. 1143
  5021. 00:46:07,363 --> 00:46:08,765
  5022. Get in there, go!
  5023.  
  5024. 1144
  5025. 00:46:11,667 --> 00:46:13,700
  5026. Oh, I just, I
  5027. don't feel good about this.
  5028.  
  5029. 1145
  5030. 00:46:13,702 --> 00:46:14,868
  5031. I think we should go back home.
  5032.  
  5033. 1146
  5034. 00:46:14,870 --> 00:46:15,803
  5035. What?
  5036.  
  5037. 1147
  5038. 00:46:15,805 --> 00:46:17,370
  5039. He gave you a key, didn't he?
  5040.  
  5041. 1148
  5042. 00:46:17,372 --> 00:46:18,705
  5043. By giving you a
  5044. key it is implied
  5045.  
  5046. 1149
  5047. 00:46:18,707 --> 00:46:19,707
  5048. that you have
  5049. permission to gain entry
  5050.  
  5051. 1150
  5052. 00:46:19,709 --> 00:46:22,475
  5053. at any time to the
  5054. domicile said key unlocks.
  5055.  
  5056. 1151
  5057. 00:46:22,477 --> 00:46:23,711
  5058. I'm pretty
  5059. certain that implication
  5060.  
  5061. 1152
  5062. 00:46:23,713 --> 00:46:25,412
  5063. doesn't mean scavenging
  5064. said domicile
  5065.  
  5066. 1153
  5067. 00:46:25,414 --> 00:46:26,513
  5068. for dirty little secrets.
  5069.  
  5070. 1154
  5071. 00:46:26,515 --> 00:46:27,448
  5072. Okay, you know what?
  5073.  
  5074. 1155
  5075. 00:46:27,450 --> 00:46:28,182
  5076. I take no pleasure in this.
  5077.  
  5078. 1156
  5079. 00:46:28,184 --> 00:46:30,151
  5080. Yes, you do.
  5081.  
  5082. 1157
  5083. 00:46:30,153 --> 00:46:30,884
  5084. Okay, I do.
  5085.  
  5086. 1158
  5087. 00:46:30,886 --> 00:46:31,919
  5088. Okay, yes, I do, a little bit.
  5089.  
  5090. 1159
  5091. 00:46:31,921 --> 00:46:32,919
  5092. But again, it's all for you.
  5093.  
  5094. 1160
  5095. 00:46:32,921 --> 00:46:34,154
  5096. I'm pretty certain you
  5097. missed your true calling
  5098.  
  5099. 1161
  5100. 00:46:34,156 --> 00:46:36,323
  5101. as a criminal mastermind but
  5102. let's just get this over with
  5103.  
  5104. 1162
  5105. 00:46:36,325 --> 00:46:37,825
  5106. and we'll get out of here.
  5107.  
  5108. 1163
  5109. 00:46:37,827 --> 00:46:38,859
  5110. Patience, Syd.
  5111.  
  5112. 1164
  5113. 00:46:38,861 --> 00:46:40,528
  5114. This might take a while.
  5115.  
  5116. 1165
  5117. 00:46:40,530 --> 00:46:41,662
  5118. Even Nick wouldn't
  5119. be foolish enough
  5120.  
  5121. 1166
  5122. 00:46:41,664 --> 00:46:46,202
  5123. to just leave a big box of
  5124. evidence out in the open.
  5125.  
  5126. 1167
  5127. 00:46:56,345 --> 00:46:57,944
  5128. You
  5129. never mentioned you dated Oprah.
  5130.  
  5131. 1168
  5132. 00:46:57,946 --> 00:46:59,279
  5133. I always
  5134. figured Christine
  5135.  
  5136. 1169
  5137. 00:46:59,281 --> 00:47:00,948
  5138. would land in the lap of luxury.
  5139.  
  5140. 1170
  5141. 00:47:00,950 --> 00:47:02,950
  5142. Face first, from
  5143. the looks of it.
  5144.  
  5145. 1171
  5146. 00:47:02,952 --> 00:47:05,689
  5147. Wow, I would
  5148. totally live here.
  5149.  
  5150. 1172
  5151. 00:47:06,888 --> 00:47:10,424
  5152. Maybe you two should
  5153. hang back for the moment.
  5154.  
  5155. 1173
  5156. 00:47:10,426 --> 00:47:14,361
  5157. I don't wanna just
  5158. thrust this in her face.
  5159.  
  5160. 1174
  5161. 00:47:14,363 --> 00:47:15,729
  5162. Seems like that's
  5163. how you got yourself
  5164.  
  5165. 1175
  5166. 00:47:15,731 --> 00:47:17,765
  5167. in this situation to begin with.
  5168.  
  5169. 1176
  5170. 00:47:17,767 --> 00:47:18,832
  5171. Hilarious.
  5172.  
  5173. 1177
  5174. 00:47:18,834 --> 00:47:19,870
  5175. Wait here.
  5176.  
  5177. 1178
  5178. 00:47:29,511 --> 00:47:32,412
  5179. Don't just stand there.
  5180.  
  5181. 1179
  5182. 00:47:32,414 --> 00:47:33,214
  5183. Wow.
  5184.  
  5185. 1180
  5186. 00:47:33,216 --> 00:47:34,915
  5187. I have to be at
  5188. UCLA in one hour
  5189.  
  5190. 1181
  5191. 00:47:34,917 --> 00:47:36,649
  5192. to give my speech on
  5193. women's empowerment
  5194.  
  5195. 1182
  5196. 00:47:36,651 --> 00:47:38,419
  5197. in the social media arena.
  5198.  
  5199. 1183
  5200. 00:47:38,421 --> 00:47:40,821
  5201. The helicopter will be
  5202. here in five minutes.
  5203.  
  5204. 1184
  5205. 00:47:40,823 --> 00:47:42,589
  5206. How fast can you tweet?
  5207.  
  5208. 1185
  5209. 00:47:42,591 --> 00:47:43,524
  5210. Huh, I don't know.
  5211.  
  5212. 1186
  5213. 00:47:43,526 --> 00:47:44,991
  5214. Strike two.
  5215.  
  5216. 1187
  5217. 00:47:44,993 --> 00:47:46,459
  5218. If you want this job, you'd
  5219. better pick up the pace.
  5220.  
  5221. 1188
  5222. 00:47:46,461 --> 00:47:47,428
  5223. - Job?
  5224. - I require someone
  5225.  
  5226. 1189
  5227. 00:47:47,430 --> 00:47:48,796
  5228. who can manage my schedule,
  5229.  
  5230. 1190
  5231. 00:47:48,798 --> 00:47:51,564
  5232. count my calories feed my geckos
  5233.  
  5234. 1191
  5235. 00:47:51,566 --> 00:47:54,535
  5236. and make sure I don't
  5237. wear the same dress twice.
  5238.  
  5239. 1192
  5240. 00:47:54,537 --> 00:47:57,904
  5241. If you last two weeks, I'll
  5242. double your salary, okay?
  5243.  
  5244. 1193
  5245. 00:47:57,906 --> 00:48:00,908
  5246. I'm not here for
  5247. the job, Christine.
  5248.  
  5249. 1194
  5250. 00:48:00,910 --> 00:48:01,875
  5251. Who are you?
  5252.  
  5253. 1195
  5254. 00:48:01,877 --> 00:48:04,912
  5255. It's me, Nick, Nick Pearson.
  5256.  
  5257. 1196
  5258. 00:48:04,914 --> 00:48:06,749
  5259. Nick, Nick!
  5260.  
  5261. 1197
  5262. 00:48:07,749 --> 00:48:08,383
  5263. Oh!
  5264.  
  5265. 1198
  5266. 00:48:09,885 --> 00:48:11,951
  5267. I didn't recognize you, Nick.
  5268.  
  5269. 1199
  5270. 00:48:11,953 --> 00:48:13,957
  5271. Oh, you didn't age well.
  5272.  
  5273. 1200
  5274. 00:48:16,425 --> 00:48:17,857
  5275. You're not on my schedule.
  5276.  
  5277. 1201
  5278. 00:48:17,859 --> 00:48:20,461
  5279. I know, I called you
  5280. an hour ago, remember?
  5281.  
  5282. 1202
  5283. 00:48:20,463 --> 00:48:21,861
  5284. This is why I
  5285. need an assistant.
  5286.  
  5287. 1203
  5288. 00:48:21,863 --> 00:48:23,730
  5289. I think I can fit
  5290. you in on Thursday.
  5291.  
  5292. 1204
  5293. 00:48:23,732 --> 00:48:24,865
  5294. No, I gotta talk
  5295. to you right now.
  5296.  
  5297. 1205
  5298. 00:48:24,867 --> 00:48:25,966
  5299. It's important.
  5300.  
  5301. 1206
  5302. 00:48:25,968 --> 00:48:29,270
  5303. Okay, you have 35 seconds, go.
  5304.  
  5305. 1207
  5306. 00:48:29,272 --> 00:48:30,703
  5307. Okay.
  5308.  
  5309. 1208
  5310. 00:48:30,705 --> 00:48:34,408
  5311. Did you and I have a child
  5312.  
  5313. 1209
  5314. 00:48:34,410 --> 00:48:38,412
  5315. that you secretly gave up
  5316. for adoption, by any chance?
  5317.  
  5318. 1210
  5319. 00:48:38,414 --> 00:48:40,881
  5320. Why would you ask me that?
  5321.  
  5322. 1211
  5323. 00:48:40,883 --> 00:48:42,383
  5324. Because this kid out here
  5325.  
  5326. 1212
  5327. 00:48:42,385 --> 00:48:45,386
  5328. deserves to know
  5329. who his mother is.
  5330.  
  5331. 1213
  5332. 00:48:45,388 --> 00:48:47,888
  5333. Well, he's awfully big.
  5334.  
  5335. 1214
  5336. 00:48:47,890 --> 00:48:49,555
  5337. Does baldness run
  5338. in your family?
  5339.  
  5340. 1215
  5341. 00:48:49,557 --> 00:48:50,691
  5342. Not him!
  5343.  
  5344. 1216
  5345. 00:48:50,693 --> 00:48:51,924
  5346. The other one!
  5347.  
  5348. 1217
  5349. 00:48:51,926 --> 00:48:52,792
  5350. Nick, for someone
  5351. who writes comedy,
  5352.  
  5353. 1218
  5354. 00:48:52,794 --> 00:48:55,662
  5355. you really can't
  5356. take a joke, can you?
  5357.  
  5358. 1219
  5359. 00:48:55,664 --> 00:48:56,863
  5360. I'm a little off my game.
  5361.  
  5362. 1220
  5363. 00:48:56,865 --> 00:48:58,031
  5364. Sorry, Nick, I can't help you.
  5365.  
  5366. 1221
  5367. 00:48:58,033 --> 00:48:58,966
  5368. It wasn't me.
  5369.  
  5370. 1222
  5371. 00:48:58,968 --> 00:49:01,301
  5372. Tell the kid I'm sorry.
  5373.  
  5374. 1223
  5375. 00:49:01,303 --> 00:49:02,939
  5376. Sorry to bother you.
  5377.  
  5378. 1224
  5379. 00:49:04,774 --> 00:49:05,775
  5380. Hey, Nick?
  5381.  
  5382. 1225
  5383. 00:49:06,709 --> 00:49:08,941
  5384. For whatever it's worth,
  5385. I can't have kids.
  5386.  
  5387. 1226
  5388. 00:49:08,943 --> 00:49:11,912
  5389. You would have found that
  5390. out if you'd stuck around.
  5391.  
  5392. 1227
  5393. 00:49:11,914 --> 00:49:12,979
  5394. I built my empire instead.
  5395.  
  5396. 1228
  5397. 00:49:12,981 --> 00:49:15,049
  5398. Everything happens for a reason.
  5399.  
  5400. 1229
  5401. 00:49:15,051 --> 00:49:16,486
  5402. Bye, good luck.
  5403.  
  5404. 1230
  5405. 00:49:23,392 --> 00:49:24,957
  5406. Another dead end?
  5407.  
  5408. 1231
  5409. 00:49:24,959 --> 00:49:25,794
  5410. Yup.
  5411.  
  5412. 1232
  5413. 00:49:32,868 --> 00:49:37,607
  5414. You really flushed that
  5415. golden ticket down the commode.
  5416.  
  5417. 1233
  5418. 00:49:50,419 --> 00:49:51,685
  5419. There are more women here
  5420.  
  5421. 1234
  5422. 00:49:51,687 --> 00:49:53,754
  5423. than in my entire
  5424. graduating class.
  5425.  
  5426. 1235
  5427. 00:49:53,756 --> 00:49:55,756
  5428. My class was huge, remember?
  5429.  
  5430. 1236
  5431. 00:49:55,758 --> 00:49:56,589
  5432. Want chips?
  5433.  
  5434. 1237
  5435. 00:49:56,591 --> 00:49:58,058
  5436. No, Kelly.
  5437.  
  5438. 1238
  5439. 00:49:58,060 --> 00:50:00,127
  5440. I still have to fit into
  5441. my wedding dress, remember?
  5442.  
  5443. 1239
  5444. 00:50:00,129 --> 00:50:02,595
  5445. Seriously, Nick should be
  5446. bronzed and put on exhibit
  5447.  
  5448. 1240
  5449. 00:50:02,597 --> 00:50:05,499
  5450. at the Alfred Kinsey museum.
  5451.  
  5452. 1241
  5453. 00:50:05,501 --> 00:50:07,100
  5454. Oh, there's another one.
  5455.  
  5456. 1242
  5457. 00:50:07,102 --> 00:50:10,807
  5458. That makes three
  5459. Christines at last count.
  5460.  
  5461. 1243
  5462. 00:50:12,607 --> 00:50:13,709
  5463. Oh, my God.
  5464.  
  5465. 1244
  5466. 00:50:14,776 --> 00:50:16,642
  5467. Nick is a gigolo.
  5468.  
  5469. 1245
  5470. 00:50:16,644 --> 00:50:18,078
  5471. What?
  5472.  
  5473. 1246
  5474. 00:50:18,080 --> 00:50:19,613
  5475. No, I don't think it says
  5476. anything about him getting paid.
  5477.  
  5478. 1247
  5479. 00:50:19,615 --> 00:50:21,381
  5480. He's just a slut.
  5481.  
  5482. 1248
  5483. 00:50:21,383 --> 00:50:22,116
  5484. You're right!
  5485.  
  5486. 1249
  5487. 00:50:22,118 --> 00:50:23,783
  5488. He's a slut!
  5489.  
  5490. 1250
  5491. 00:50:23,785 --> 00:50:26,386
  5492. And all this time,
  5493. he's been lying to me
  5494.  
  5495. 1251
  5496. 00:50:26,388 --> 00:50:31,024
  5497. and keeping secrets from
  5498. me and I've been an idiot!
  5499.  
  5500. 1252
  5501. 00:50:31,026 --> 00:50:33,060
  5502. All signs do point
  5503. to yes on that one.
  5504.  
  5505. 1253
  5506. 00:50:33,062 --> 00:50:34,928
  5507. So what do I do?
  5508.  
  5509. 1254
  5510. 00:50:34,930 --> 00:50:36,095
  5511. I don't know what to do!
  5512.  
  5513. 1255
  5514. 00:50:36,097 --> 00:50:40,133
  5515. I just need, I need
  5516. a little more time.
  5517.  
  5518. 1256
  5519. 00:50:40,135 --> 00:50:41,100
  5520. Sydney.
  5521.  
  5522. 1257
  5523. 00:50:41,102 --> 00:50:43,002
  5524. Just a little more time.
  5525.  
  5526. 1258
  5527. 00:50:43,004 --> 00:50:44,037
  5528. Nope, time is now.
  5529.  
  5530. 1259
  5531. 00:50:44,039 --> 00:50:45,506
  5532. What?
  5533.  
  5534. 1260
  5535. 00:50:45,508 --> 00:50:46,540
  5536. It's time.
  5537.  
  5538. 1261
  5539. 00:50:46,542 --> 00:50:48,075
  5540. - Oh, my god!
  5541. - We gotta go.
  5542.  
  5543. 1262
  5544. 00:50:48,077 --> 00:50:49,642
  5545. Wait, no.
  5546.  
  5547. 1263
  5548. 00:50:49,644 --> 00:50:51,779
  5549. Cover that, put something
  5550. on that chair on the mark.
  5551.  
  5552. 1264
  5553. 00:50:51,781 --> 00:50:52,745
  5554. Do you
  5555. want the chips?
  5556.  
  5557. 1265
  5558. 00:50:52,747 --> 00:50:54,415
  5559. Okay, yeah, bring the chips.
  5560.  
  5561. 1266
  5562. 00:50:54,417 --> 00:50:56,582
  5563. I gotta call Richard.
  5564.  
  5565. 1267
  5566. 00:50:59,655 --> 00:51:00,787
  5567. How're you doing?
  5568.  
  5569. 1268
  5570. 00:51:00,789 --> 00:51:02,423
  5571. Fine.
  5572.  
  5573. 1269
  5574. 00:51:02,425 --> 00:51:03,890
  5575. I wish I had some ice cream.
  5576.  
  5577. 1270
  5578. 00:51:03,892 --> 00:51:07,093
  5579. Oh, well, maybe later
  5580. we'll get you some.
  5581.  
  5582. 1271
  5583. 00:51:07,095 --> 00:51:08,694
  5584. That'd be great.
  5585.  
  5586. 1272
  5587. 00:51:08,696 --> 00:51:10,129
  5588. What's your favorite flavor?
  5589.  
  5590. 1273
  5591. 00:51:10,131 --> 00:51:10,964
  5592. Strawberry.
  5593.  
  5594. 1274
  5595. 00:51:10,966 --> 00:51:14,066
  5596. No way, that's
  5597. my favorite flavor.
  5598.  
  5599. 1275
  5600. 00:51:14,068 --> 00:51:15,334
  5601. What are the odds?
  5602.  
  5603. 1276
  5604. 00:51:15,336 --> 00:51:19,573
  5605. I mean, a lot of people like
  5606. strawberry, so not that high.
  5607.  
  5608. 1277
  5609. 00:51:19,575 --> 00:51:22,209
  5610. Ooh, ooh, Richard, Richard!
  5611.  
  5612. 1278
  5613. 00:51:22,211 --> 00:51:24,812
  5614. Answer your stupid phone!
  5615.  
  5616. 1279
  5617. 00:51:24,814 --> 00:51:26,015
  5618. Okay, okay, okay.
  5619.  
  5620. 1280
  5621. 00:51:27,182 --> 00:51:29,216
  5622. Ow, they're really
  5623. coming fast now!
  5624.  
  5625. 1281
  5626. 00:51:29,218 --> 00:51:31,017
  5627. Just try to stay calm, Kelly.
  5628.  
  5629. 1282
  5630. 00:51:31,019 --> 00:51:32,919
  5631. Why did you let me
  5632. eat all the chips?
  5633.  
  5634. 1283
  5635. 00:51:32,921 --> 00:51:35,087
  5636. I'm gonna be gassy
  5637. in the delivery room!
  5638.  
  5639. 1284
  5640. 00:51:35,089 --> 00:51:37,124
  5641. Do not worry about
  5642. that right now!
  5643.  
  5644. 1285
  5645. 00:51:37,126 --> 00:51:39,959
  5646. I would just relax and try to
  5647. concentrate on whatever it is
  5648.  
  5649. 1286
  5650. 00:51:39,961 --> 00:51:41,662
  5651. they tell you to concentrate on
  5652.  
  5653. 1287
  5654. 00:51:41,664 --> 00:51:43,129
  5655. in those La Paz
  5656. classes you took!
  5657.  
  5658. 1288
  5659. 00:51:43,131 --> 00:51:44,497
  5660. I wasn't listening!
  5661.  
  5662. 1289
  5663. 00:51:44,499 --> 00:51:46,066
  5664. It's Lamaze!
  5665.  
  5666. 1290
  5667. 00:51:46,068 --> 00:51:47,700
  5668. And how am I supposed to
  5669. relax when my Lamaze partner
  5670.  
  5671. 1291
  5672. 00:51:47,702 --> 00:51:50,102
  5673. won't even answer
  5674. his phone, god!
  5675.  
  5676. 1292
  5677. 00:51:50,104 --> 00:51:51,805
  5678. Richard, hi, it's your wife.
  5679.  
  5680. 1293
  5681. 00:51:51,807 --> 00:51:52,939
  5682. I'm gonna kill you!
  5683.  
  5684. 1294
  5685. 00:51:52,941 --> 00:51:55,042
  5686. Just breathe with me.
  5687.  
  5688. 1295
  5689. 00:51:55,044 --> 00:51:56,977
  5690. I don't
  5691. know what to do!
  5692.  
  5693. 1296
  5694. 00:51:56,979 --> 00:51:59,015
  5695. Sorry, that's just chips.
  5696.  
  5697. 1297
  5698. 00:52:00,115 --> 00:52:01,048
  5699. I'm having a baby!
  5700.  
  5701. 1298
  5702. 00:52:01,050 --> 00:52:02,249
  5703. How can he be stuck in traffic?
  5704.  
  5705. 1299
  5706. 00:52:02,251 --> 00:52:03,250
  5707. There's always
  5708. traffic on the 405.
  5709.  
  5710. 1300
  5711. 00:52:03,252 --> 00:52:04,250
  5712. He'll be here.
  5713.  
  5714. 1301
  5715. 00:52:04,252 --> 00:52:05,151
  5716. Oh, my god, he's not
  5717. gonna be here in time!
  5718.  
  5719. 1302
  5720. 00:52:05,153 --> 00:52:07,087
  5721. No, no, no, no, I
  5722. can't do this alone!
  5723.  
  5724. 1303
  5725. 00:52:07,089 --> 00:52:08,855
  5726. Syd, Syd, you have to
  5727. come in there with me!
  5728.  
  5729. 1304
  5730. 00:52:08,857 --> 00:52:09,923
  5731. Oh, no, no, I can't do that.
  5732.  
  5733. 1305
  5734. 00:52:09,925 --> 00:52:11,158
  5735. Yes, yes, you can!
  5736.  
  5737. 1306
  5738. 00:52:11,160 --> 00:52:12,093
  5739. I am your sister and
  5740. I say you have to!
  5741.  
  5742. 1307
  5743. 00:52:12,095 --> 00:52:13,627
  5744. Don't they have,
  5745. like, stand-by people,
  5746.  
  5747. 1308
  5748. 00:52:13,629 --> 00:52:14,727
  5749. like rent-a-coaches
  5750. or something?
  5751.  
  5752. 1309
  5753. 00:52:14,729 --> 00:52:16,229
  5754. Syd, Sydney!
  5755.  
  5756. 1310
  5757. 00:52:16,231 --> 00:52:18,765
  5758. You have to do this or I
  5759. will tell everyone in here
  5760.  
  5761. 1311
  5762. 00:52:18,767 --> 00:52:20,767
  5763. how you shit your pants at
  5764. Neil Greenblatt's bar mitzvah
  5765.  
  5766. 1312
  5767. 00:52:20,769 --> 00:52:22,535
  5768. and then you flushed your
  5769. underpants down the toilet
  5770.  
  5771. 1313
  5772. 00:52:22,537 --> 00:52:24,104
  5773. and flooded the entire
  5774. basement of the synagogue.
  5775.  
  5776. 1314
  5777. 00:52:24,106 --> 00:52:25,506
  5778. That was like 20 years ago.
  5779.  
  5780. 1315
  5781. 00:52:25,508 --> 00:52:26,607
  5782. I don't care!
  5783.  
  5784. 1316
  5785. 00:52:26,609 --> 00:52:28,174
  5786. I'm about to launch a
  5787. watermelon out of my punani!
  5788.  
  5789. 1317
  5790. 00:52:28,176 --> 00:52:30,877
  5791. Do not test me, Sydney!
  5792.  
  5793. 1318
  5794. 00:52:30,879 --> 00:52:31,944
  5795. Here we are.
  5796.  
  5797. 1319
  5798. 00:52:31,946 --> 00:52:33,082
  5799. 947 Main Street.
  5800.  
  5801. 1320
  5802. 00:52:34,517 --> 00:52:35,218
  5803. Cross Hakido.
  5804.  
  5805. 1321
  5806. 00:52:36,252 --> 00:52:38,151
  5807. Wow, this place looks amazing.
  5808.  
  5809. 1322
  5810. 00:52:38,153 --> 00:52:39,986
  5811. I'm gonna sit this one
  5812. out and take Mr. Sparkles
  5813.  
  5814. 1323
  5815. 00:52:39,988 --> 00:52:41,988
  5816. on a much needed stroll.
  5817.  
  5818. 1324
  5819. 00:52:41,990 --> 00:52:43,122
  5820. We'll see you back here.
  5821.  
  5822. 1325
  5823. 00:52:43,124 --> 00:52:44,258
  5824. Okay.
  5825.  
  5826. 1326
  5827. 00:52:44,260 --> 00:52:45,292
  5828. Let's step that punch!
  5829.  
  5830. 1327
  5831. 00:52:46,528 --> 00:52:47,160
  5832. Single punch!
  5833.  
  5834. 1328
  5835. 00:52:47,997 --> 00:52:48,828
  5836. Two!
  5837.  
  5838. 1329
  5839. 00:52:48,830 --> 00:52:49,696
  5840. Three!
  5841.  
  5842. 1330
  5843. 00:52:49,698 --> 00:52:50,897
  5844. Four!
  5845.  
  5846. 1331
  5847. 00:52:50,899 --> 00:52:52,131
  5848. Attention.
  5849.  
  5850. 1332
  5851. 00:52:57,772 --> 00:52:59,205
  5852. Hey, Nick!
  5853.  
  5854. 1333
  5855. 00:52:59,207 --> 00:53:00,140
  5856. Hi, Schyler.
  5857.  
  5858. 1334
  5859. 00:53:00,142 --> 00:53:01,008
  5860. You look great.
  5861.  
  5862. 1335
  5863. 00:53:01,010 --> 00:53:02,843
  5864. This place is fantastic.
  5865.  
  5866. 1336
  5867. 00:53:02,845 --> 00:53:05,979
  5868. Yeah, and after two
  5869. years, I'm the owner.
  5870.  
  5871. 1337
  5872. 00:53:05,981 --> 00:53:08,015
  5873. Are you like a ninja?
  5874.  
  5875. 1338
  5876. 00:53:08,017 --> 00:53:09,283
  5877. Almost.
  5878.  
  5879. 1339
  5880. 00:53:09,285 --> 00:53:10,283
  5881. What's your name?
  5882.  
  5883. 1340
  5884. 00:53:10,285 --> 00:53:11,285
  5885. Mason.
  5886.  
  5887. 1341
  5888. 00:53:11,287 --> 00:53:13,120
  5889. Yeah, would you like
  5890. to join my class today?
  5891.  
  5892. 1342
  5893. 00:53:13,122 --> 00:53:14,321
  5894. Sure!
  5895.  
  5896. 1343
  5897. 00:53:14,323 --> 00:53:15,321
  5898. Okay, there's
  5899. extra gis over there
  5900.  
  5901. 1344
  5902. 00:53:15,323 --> 00:53:16,723
  5903. in the changing room.
  5904.  
  5905. 1345
  5906. 00:53:16,725 --> 00:53:17,624
  5907. Just put one on and
  5908. then come out to the mat
  5909.  
  5910. 1346
  5911. 00:53:17,626 --> 00:53:18,558
  5912. and join the class.
  5913.  
  5914. 1347
  5915. 00:53:18,560 --> 00:53:20,294
  5916. Okay, thanks!
  5917.  
  5918. 1348
  5919. 00:53:20,296 --> 00:53:21,194
  5920. He's a sweet kid.
  5921.  
  5922. 1349
  5923. 00:53:21,196 --> 00:53:22,629
  5924. Mm-hmm.
  5925.  
  5926. 1350
  5927. 00:53:22,631 --> 00:53:23,729
  5928. What's he doing
  5929. with a nut like you
  5930.  
  5931. 1351
  5932. 00:53:23,731 --> 00:53:25,732
  5933. and what do you want from me?
  5934.  
  5935. 1352
  5936. 00:53:25,734 --> 00:53:29,236
  5937. Well, it's a bit of
  5938. a delicate situation.
  5939.  
  5940. 1353
  5941. 00:53:29,238 --> 00:53:30,970
  5942. I need to talk about us.
  5943.  
  5944. 1354
  5945. 00:53:30,972 --> 00:53:31,872
  5946. Us?
  5947.  
  5948. 1355
  5949. 00:53:31,874 --> 00:53:33,276
  5950. As in you and me?
  5951.  
  5952. 1356
  5953. 00:53:34,276 --> 00:53:38,013
  5954. Yeah, it could also
  5955. involve other parties.
  5956.  
  5957. 1357
  5958. 00:53:40,015 --> 00:53:41,647
  5959. Interesting.
  5960.  
  5961. 1358
  5962. 00:53:41,649 --> 00:53:44,153
  5963. Okay, five-minute water break!
  5964.  
  5965. 1359
  5966. 00:53:45,287 --> 00:53:46,752
  5967. I'll tell you what, Nick.
  5968.  
  5969. 1360
  5970. 00:53:46,754 --> 00:53:48,321
  5971. I'm a little short-handed today.
  5972.  
  5973. 1361
  5974. 00:53:48,323 --> 00:53:49,890
  5975. Why don't you help me out
  5976. for the next 30 minutes
  5977.  
  5978. 1362
  5979. 00:53:49,892 --> 00:53:52,993
  5980. and maybe I'll answer
  5981. your questions.
  5982.  
  5983. 1363
  5984. 00:53:52,995 --> 00:53:54,962
  5985. Help you out?
  5986.  
  5987. 1364
  5988. 00:53:54,964 --> 00:53:56,099
  5989. Doing what?
  5990.  
  5991. 1365
  5992. 00:53:58,968 --> 00:54:00,232
  5993. Is this completely necessary?
  5994.  
  5995. 1366
  5996. 00:54:00,234 --> 00:54:04,071
  5997. You want your questions
  5998. answered or not?
  5999.  
  6000. 1367
  6001. 00:54:04,073 --> 00:54:05,037
  6002. Yeah.
  6003.  
  6004. 1368
  6005. 00:54:05,039 --> 00:54:06,305
  6006. Line up!
  6007.  
  6008. 1369
  6009. 00:54:06,307 --> 00:54:07,309
  6010. Yes, ma'am!
  6011.  
  6012. 1370
  6013. 00:54:10,713 --> 00:54:12,812
  6014. On your knees.
  6015.  
  6016. 1371
  6017. 00:54:17,185 --> 00:54:19,752
  6018. Oh, I'm so glad
  6019. you're so amused.
  6020.  
  6021. 1372
  6022. 00:54:19,754 --> 00:54:21,254
  6023. Side kicks!
  6024.  
  6025. 1373
  6026. 00:54:24,627 --> 00:54:26,158
  6027. Little lower next time, sweetie.
  6028.  
  6029. 1374
  6030. 00:54:26,160 --> 00:54:27,361
  6031. Could we take this seriously?
  6032.  
  6033. 1375
  6034. 00:54:27,363 --> 00:54:28,227
  6035. I need to find
  6036. this kid's mother.
  6037.  
  6038. 1376
  6039. 00:54:28,229 --> 00:54:29,363
  6040. Oh, I'm sorry, Nick,
  6041.  
  6042. 1377
  6043. 00:54:29,365 --> 00:54:31,397
  6044. but talk about a
  6045. needle in the haystack.
  6046.  
  6047. 1378
  6048. 00:54:31,399 --> 00:54:32,399
  6049. Well, I'll take
  6050. that to be a no?
  6051.  
  6052. 1379
  6053. 00:54:32,401 --> 00:54:33,834
  6054. Front kick!
  6055.  
  6056. 1380
  6057. 00:54:35,169 --> 00:54:36,403
  6058. Believe me, Nick,
  6059. if we had a baby,
  6060.  
  6061. 1381
  6062. 00:54:36,405 --> 00:54:38,104
  6063. you would have known
  6064. about it from day one.
  6065.  
  6066. 1382
  6067. 00:54:38,106 --> 00:54:39,872
  6068. Why don't you ask Tonya Wesson?
  6069.  
  6070. 1383
  6071. 00:54:39,874 --> 00:54:41,274
  6072. Tonya Wesson?
  6073.  
  6074. 1384
  6075. 00:54:41,276 --> 00:54:42,975
  6076. Who's Tonya Wesson?
  6077.  
  6078. 1385
  6079. 00:54:42,977 --> 00:54:45,044
  6080. Oh, now don't tell me
  6081. you don't remember Tonya.
  6082.  
  6083. 1386
  6084. 00:54:45,046 --> 00:54:48,314
  6085. Remember, my friend Tonya?
  6086.  
  6087. 1387
  6088. 00:54:48,316 --> 00:54:49,216
  6089. The one I caught you with
  6090.  
  6091. 1388
  6092. 00:54:49,218 --> 00:54:51,685
  6093. when you and I were
  6094. supposedly dating?
  6095.  
  6096. 1389
  6097. 00:54:51,687 --> 00:54:54,921
  6098. Oh, Tonya Wesson, yeah.
  6099.  
  6100. 1390
  6101. 00:54:54,923 --> 00:54:56,189
  6102. Well, I mean, that's
  6103. hardly my fault.
  6104.  
  6105. 1391
  6106. 00:54:56,191 --> 00:54:58,424
  6107. It takes two to tango, you know?
  6108.  
  6109. 1392
  6110. 00:54:58,426 --> 00:55:01,060
  6111. Yeah, but it only
  6112. takes one to say no.
  6113.  
  6114. 1393
  6115. 00:55:01,062 --> 00:55:02,029
  6116. Crotch kick!
  6117.  
  6118. 1394
  6119. 00:55:12,441 --> 00:55:13,874
  6120. What's wrong with you?
  6121.  
  6122. 1395
  6123. 00:55:13,876 --> 00:55:15,241
  6124. Move!
  6125.  
  6126. 1396
  6127. 00:55:15,243 --> 00:55:18,345
  6128. You don't let everybody
  6129. in front of you!
  6130.  
  6131. 1397
  6132. 00:55:18,347 --> 00:55:20,714
  6133. Come on, drive!
  6134.  
  6135. 1398
  6136. 00:55:22,251 --> 00:55:23,216
  6137. Hey, baby!
  6138.  
  6139. 1399
  6140. 00:55:23,218 --> 00:55:24,817
  6141. How's it going, huh?
  6142.  
  6143. 1400
  6144. 00:55:24,819 --> 00:55:25,986
  6145. How far away are you?
  6146.  
  6147. 1401
  6148. 00:55:25,988 --> 00:55:29,321
  6149. I don't know,
  6150. maybe 20, 30 minutes?
  6151.  
  6152. 1402
  6153. 00:55:29,323 --> 00:55:30,323
  6154. I'm gonna kill you!
  6155.  
  6156. 1403
  6157. 00:55:30,325 --> 00:55:31,258
  6158. I'm on my way!
  6159.  
  6160. 1404
  6161. 00:55:31,260 --> 00:55:32,359
  6162. I am coming, don't worry!
  6163.  
  6164. 1405
  6165. 00:55:32,361 --> 00:55:34,093
  6166. You're gonna
  6167. stay on this phone
  6168.  
  6169. 1406
  6170. 00:55:34,095 --> 00:55:36,229
  6171. until you get here or this
  6172. baby does, do you hear me?
  6173.  
  6174. 1407
  6175. 00:55:36,231 --> 00:55:37,698
  6176. Yup, yup.
  6177.  
  6178. 1408
  6179. 00:55:37,700 --> 00:55:39,066
  6180. Come on, I
  6181. gotta get to work!
  6182.  
  6183. 1409
  6184. 00:55:39,068 --> 00:55:40,399
  6185. I'm stayin' on the phone.
  6186.  
  6187. 1410
  6188. 00:55:40,401 --> 00:55:41,368
  6189. Thanks for your help, Nick.
  6190.  
  6191. 1411
  6192. 00:55:41,370 --> 00:55:43,803
  6193. Oh, sure, anytime.
  6194.  
  6195. 1412
  6196. 00:55:43,805 --> 00:55:45,337
  6197. Hey, Fabular, check it out!
  6198.  
  6199. 1413
  6200. 00:55:46,874 --> 00:55:48,475
  6201. Oh, that's impressive.
  6202.  
  6203. 1414
  6204. 00:55:48,477 --> 00:55:50,910
  6205. The next time I need a bodyguard,
  6206. I'm gonna give you a call.
  6207.  
  6208. 1415
  6209. 00:55:50,912 --> 00:55:53,946
  6210. Well, it is a small
  6211. world after all.
  6212.  
  6213. 1416
  6214. 00:55:53,948 --> 00:55:56,415
  6215. Hello, Ernie, long time no see.
  6216.  
  6217. 1417
  6218. 00:55:56,417 --> 00:55:57,984
  6219. I beg your pardon?
  6220.  
  6221. 1418
  6222. 00:55:57,986 --> 00:55:59,453
  6223. I think you made a mistake.
  6224.  
  6225. 1419
  6226. 00:55:59,455 --> 00:56:00,720
  6227. This is The Amazing Fabular.
  6228.  
  6229. 1420
  6230. 00:56:00,722 --> 00:56:02,354
  6231. Oh, yes, yes it is.
  6232.  
  6233. 1421
  6234. 00:56:02,356 --> 00:56:04,390
  6235. Also known as Ernie Swanson.
  6236.  
  6237. 1422
  6238. 00:56:04,392 --> 00:56:08,462
  6239. Cerritos Clown
  6240. University, class of 1994.
  6241.  
  6242. 1423
  6243. 00:56:08,464 --> 00:56:10,129
  6244. You went to Clown College?
  6245.  
  6246. 1424
  6247. 00:56:10,131 --> 00:56:11,365
  6248. You bet he did.
  6249.  
  6250. 1425
  6251. 00:56:11,367 --> 00:56:14,500
  6252. Only unlike the rest of our
  6253. class who dedicated our talents
  6254.  
  6255. 1426
  6256. 00:56:14,502 --> 00:56:16,736
  6257. to the entertaining of children,
  6258.  
  6259. 1427
  6260. 00:56:16,738 --> 00:56:19,439
  6261. Ernie here parlayed his skills
  6262. into bilking aging actresses
  6263.  
  6264. 1428
  6265. 00:56:19,441 --> 00:56:21,841
  6266. and rich widows out of
  6267. their bank accounts.
  6268.  
  6269. 1429
  6270. 00:56:21,843 --> 00:56:23,276
  6271. How dare you!
  6272.  
  6273. 1430
  6274. 00:56:23,278 --> 00:56:24,477
  6275. Is that true?
  6276.  
  6277. 1431
  6278. 00:56:24,479 --> 00:56:26,178
  6279. Of course not!
  6280.  
  6281. 1432
  6282. 00:56:26,180 --> 00:56:28,848
  6283. I've never laid eyes on
  6284. this wannabe Jackie Chan!
  6285.  
  6286. 1433
  6287. 00:56:28,850 --> 00:56:30,015
  6288. Oh, yeah, yeah, all right.
  6289.  
  6290. 1434
  6291. 00:56:30,017 --> 00:56:31,517
  6292. Well, maybe this
  6293. will jog your memory?
  6294.  
  6295. 1435
  6296. 00:56:31,519 --> 00:56:34,187
  6297. I was there the night Ernie
  6298. here got so loaded on grog
  6299.  
  6300. 1436
  6301. 00:56:34,189 --> 00:56:35,388
  6302. at the Renaissance fair,
  6303.  
  6304. 1437
  6305. 00:56:35,390 --> 00:56:40,127
  6306. he got a drawing of Justin
  6307. Timberlake tattooed on his butt!
  6308.  
  6309. 1438
  6310. 00:56:40,129 --> 00:56:41,428
  6311. I will not stand here
  6312.  
  6313. 1439
  6314. 00:56:41,430 --> 00:56:45,165
  6315. and listen to any more of
  6316. this psychotic slander!
  6317.  
  6318. 1440
  6319. 00:56:45,167 --> 00:56:47,500
  6320. Look, Nick, I meant
  6321. what I said before.
  6322.  
  6323. 1441
  6324. 00:56:47,502 --> 00:56:49,136
  6325. I wish you luck.
  6326.  
  6327. 1442
  6328. 00:56:49,138 --> 00:56:51,337
  6329. But if you're receiving
  6330. messages from this con artist,
  6331.  
  6332. 1443
  6333. 00:56:51,339 --> 00:56:54,875
  6334. then you're gonna need a
  6335. whole lot more than luck.
  6336.  
  6337. 1444
  6338. 00:56:54,877 --> 00:56:56,977
  6339. Mason, you're a good kid.
  6340.  
  6341. 1445
  6342. 00:56:56,979 --> 00:56:58,477
  6343. I hope you find your mom.
  6344.  
  6345. 1446
  6346. 00:56:58,479 --> 00:56:59,715
  6347. Thanks.
  6348.  
  6349. 1447
  6350. 00:57:01,950 --> 00:57:04,216
  6351. Goodness, this
  6352. creature has taken leave!
  6353.  
  6354. 1448
  6355. 00:57:04,218 --> 00:57:05,519
  6356. It's no wonder Mr. Sparkles
  6357.  
  6358. 1449
  6359. 00:57:05,521 --> 00:57:09,425
  6360. didn't leap to my defense
  6361. and rip out her jugular!
  6362.  
  6363. 1450
  6364. 00:57:11,225 --> 00:57:13,859
  6365. Mason, will you just
  6366. hang out here for a second?
  6367.  
  6368. 1451
  6369. 00:57:13,861 --> 00:57:16,095
  6370. I'm gonna talk to
  6371. Fabbie for a minute.
  6372.  
  6373. 1452
  6374. 00:57:16,097 --> 00:57:17,798
  6375. - Okay.
  6376. - What are you doing?
  6377.  
  6378. 1453
  6379. 00:57:17,800 --> 00:57:18,832
  6380. Oh, come on.
  6381.  
  6382. 1454
  6383. 00:57:18,834 --> 00:57:20,500
  6384. Okay, unhand me!
  6385.  
  6386. 1455
  6387. 00:57:20,502 --> 00:57:21,567
  6388. Show me your ass.
  6389.  
  6390. 1456
  6391. 00:57:21,569 --> 00:57:22,535
  6392. What are you,
  6393.  
  6394. 1457
  6395. 00:57:22,537 --> 00:57:24,136
  6396. You let me go right now!
  6397.  
  6398. 1458
  6399. 00:57:24,138 --> 00:57:25,337
  6400. - Show me your ass right now!
  6401. - Let me go right now!
  6402.  
  6403. 1459
  6404. 00:57:25,339 --> 00:57:26,538
  6405. Look, I'm gonna ask
  6406. you one last time,
  6407.  
  6408. 1460
  6409. 00:57:26,540 --> 00:57:30,410
  6410. do you or do you not have
  6411. Justin Timberlake on your ass?
  6412.  
  6413. 1461
  6414. 00:57:30,412 --> 00:57:31,377
  6415. So that's it?
  6416.  
  6417. 1462
  6418. 00:57:31,379 --> 00:57:32,578
  6419. That's how you treat a friend?
  6420.  
  6421. 1463
  6422. 00:57:32,580 --> 00:57:34,080
  6423. We are not friends.
  6424.  
  6425. 1464
  6426. 00:57:34,082 --> 00:57:36,283
  6427. So you'd just take the
  6428. word of a total stranger?
  6429.  
  6430. 1465
  6431. 00:57:36,285 --> 00:57:39,386
  6432. You're the total stranger.
  6433.  
  6434. 1466
  6435. 00:57:39,388 --> 00:57:43,490
  6436. And this hereby terminates
  6437. our association.
  6438.  
  6439. 1467
  6440. 00:57:43,492 --> 00:57:44,857
  6441. I don't wanna see you.
  6442.  
  6443. 1468
  6444. 00:57:44,859 --> 00:57:46,292
  6445. I don't wanna hear from you.
  6446.  
  6447. 1469
  6448. 00:57:46,294 --> 00:57:49,995
  6449. You get back into your
  6450. Fab-Mobile, get outta here.
  6451.  
  6452. 1470
  6453. 00:57:49,997 --> 00:57:51,434
  6454. Nicholas, wait.
  6455.  
  6456. 1471
  6457. 00:57:56,571 --> 00:58:00,073
  6458. Don't speak bad of me in
  6459. front of the boy, okay?
  6460.  
  6461. 1472
  6462. 00:58:00,075 --> 00:58:02,944
  6463. You don't know what
  6464. he means to me.
  6465.  
  6466. 1473
  6467. 00:58:04,479 --> 00:58:06,479
  6468. That woman was right.
  6469.  
  6470. 1474
  6471. 00:58:06,481 --> 00:58:09,218
  6472. I'm a fake, a
  6473. fraud, a charlatan.
  6474.  
  6475. 1475
  6476. 00:58:12,086 --> 00:58:15,055
  6477. I've spent most of my life
  6478. duping people out of money
  6479.  
  6480. 1476
  6481. 00:58:15,057 --> 00:58:21,229
  6482. by pretending to offer
  6483. them hope, faith, closure.
  6484.  
  6485. 1477
  6486. 00:58:21,562 --> 00:58:22,529
  6487. Why are you
  6488. telling me this now?
  6489.  
  6490. 1478
  6491. 00:58:22,531 --> 00:58:23,165
  6492. Because
  6493.  
  6494. 1479
  6495. 00:58:26,068 --> 00:58:28,567
  6496. when that boy popped in my head,
  6497.  
  6498. 1480
  6499. 00:58:28,569 --> 00:58:31,406
  6500. I instantly knew
  6501. things about him.
  6502.  
  6503. 1481
  6504. 00:58:32,573 --> 00:58:36,977
  6505. I could feel his confusion,
  6506. I could feel his pain,
  6507.  
  6508. 1482
  6509. 00:58:36,979 --> 00:58:39,345
  6510. I could feel his loneliness.
  6511.  
  6512. 1483
  6513. 00:58:39,347 --> 00:58:41,550
  6514. And I knew I had to help him.
  6515.  
  6516. 1484
  6517. 00:58:44,553 --> 00:58:46,653
  6518. You accused me of stealing
  6519. money from his foster mother.
  6520.  
  6521. 1485
  6522. 00:58:46,655 --> 00:58:50,089
  6523. I have not taken a single penny.
  6524.  
  6525. 1486
  6526. 00:58:50,091 --> 00:58:54,660
  6527. 'Cause that boy offers
  6528. something far more valuable.
  6529.  
  6530. 1487
  6531. 00:58:54,662 --> 00:58:59,534
  6532. He makes me believe I can be
  6533. a better version of myself.
  6534.  
  6535. 1488
  6536. 00:59:03,437 --> 00:59:06,406
  6537. And I know if, given
  6538. the opportunity,
  6539.  
  6540. 1489
  6541. 00:59:06,408 --> 00:59:09,145
  6542. he can do the same
  6543. thing for you.
  6544.  
  6545. 1490
  6546. 00:59:12,680 --> 00:59:16,151
  6547. I really wanna
  6548. believe you right now.
  6549.  
  6550. 1491
  6551. 00:59:20,622 --> 00:59:22,689
  6552. Well, believe this.
  6553.  
  6554. 1492
  6555. 00:59:22,691 --> 00:59:24,658
  6556. If you cut me out
  6557. of that boy's life,
  6558.  
  6559. 1493
  6560. 00:59:24,660 --> 00:59:26,526
  6561. I will never help you again.
  6562.  
  6563. 1494
  6564. 00:59:26,528 --> 00:59:30,265
  6565. And mark my words, you're
  6566. gonna need my help.
  6567.  
  6568. 1495
  6569. 00:59:32,033 --> 00:59:34,700
  6570. Well, I guess
  6571. we'll never know.
  6572.  
  6573. 1496
  6574. 00:59:34,702 --> 00:59:35,537
  6575. Up, up.
  6576.  
  6577. 1497
  6578. 00:59:43,946 --> 00:59:45,147
  6579. Good luck, Mason.
  6580.  
  6581. 1498
  6582. 00:59:46,013 --> 00:59:49,316
  6583. Sorry I can't finish our quest.
  6584.  
  6585. 1499
  6586. 00:59:49,318 --> 00:59:51,586
  6587. I have a speech to deliver.
  6588.  
  6589. 1500
  6590. 01:00:06,001 --> 01:00:07,734
  6591. Okay, everything's
  6592. looking great, Kelly.
  6593.  
  6594. 1501
  6595. 01:00:07,736 --> 01:00:08,600
  6596. - Good.
  6597. - Just keep
  6598.  
  6599. 1502
  6600. 01:00:08,602 --> 01:00:09,736
  6601. doing your breathing.
  6602.  
  6603. 1503
  6604. 01:00:09,738 --> 01:00:11,705
  6605. Great, Richard, breathing.
  6606.  
  6607. 1504
  6608. 01:00:11,707 --> 01:00:13,339
  6609. I wasn't listening, I'm sorry!
  6610.  
  6611. 1505
  6612. 01:00:13,341 --> 01:00:14,274
  6613. Okay, breathe, baby.
  6614.  
  6615. 1506
  6616. 01:00:14,276 --> 01:00:16,245
  6617. One, two, three, breathe.
  6618.  
  6619. 1507
  6620. 01:00:21,283 --> 01:00:22,582
  6621. Very good.
  6622.  
  6623. 1508
  6624. 01:00:22,584 --> 01:00:24,084
  6625. - Doing great?
  6626. - Great, you're doing great!
  6627.  
  6628. 1509
  6629. 01:00:24,086 --> 01:00:25,017
  6630. Now we're gonna
  6631. to start to push, okay?
  6632.  
  6633. 1510
  6634. 01:00:25,019 --> 01:00:27,555
  6635. Okay, yeah, okay, okay, okay.
  6636.  
  6637. 1511
  6638. 01:00:29,490 --> 01:00:30,323
  6639. No, no, no, wait, wait, wait!
  6640.  
  6641. 1512
  6642. 01:00:30,325 --> 01:00:31,256
  6643. Wait, wait, wait!
  6644.  
  6645. 1513
  6646. 01:00:31,258 --> 01:00:31,991
  6647. You have to sing the song!
  6648.  
  6649. 1514
  6650. 01:00:31,993 --> 01:00:32,691
  6651. What song?
  6652.  
  6653. 1515
  6654. 01:00:32,693 --> 01:00:34,160
  6655. Richard, tell her!
  6656.  
  6657. 1516
  6658. 01:00:34,162 --> 01:00:36,129
  6659. Deep Inside of You
  6660. by Third Eye Blind.
  6661.  
  6662. 1517
  6663. 01:00:36,131 --> 01:00:37,663
  6664. Why do I have
  6665. to sing that song?
  6666.  
  6667. 1518
  6668. 01:00:37,665 --> 01:00:38,531
  6669. 'Cause that was
  6670. the song that was playing
  6671.  
  6672. 1519
  6673. 01:00:38,533 --> 01:00:39,665
  6674. when Kelly and I
  6675. were making our baby.
  6676.  
  6677. 1520
  6678. 01:00:39,667 --> 01:00:41,368
  6679. Didn't need to know that.
  6680.  
  6681. 1521
  6682. 01:00:41,370 --> 01:00:44,337
  6683. No, no, but wait, wait,
  6684. we promised each other
  6685.  
  6686. 1522
  6687. 01:00:44,339 --> 01:00:47,272
  6688. that we'd sing this
  6689. song during the birth.
  6690.  
  6691. 1523
  6692. 01:00:47,274 --> 01:00:48,241
  6693. So just sing it!
  6694.  
  6695. 1524
  6696. 01:00:48,243 --> 01:00:49,542
  6697. I don't know the words!
  6698.  
  6699. 1525
  6700. 01:00:49,544 --> 01:00:51,276
  6701. It's okay, you
  6702. guys sing the chorus
  6703.  
  6704. 1526
  6705. 01:00:51,278 --> 01:00:54,214
  6706. and I'll help you
  6707. get through it.
  6708.  
  6709. 1527
  6710. 01:00:54,216 --> 01:00:57,316
  6711. ♪ My friends say I've changed ♪
  6712.  
  6713. 1528
  6714. 01:00:57,318 --> 01:01:02,223
  6715. ♪ I don't listen
  6716. 'cause I need to be ♪
  6717.  
  6718. 1529
  6719. 01:01:02,790 --> 01:01:05,792
  6720. ♪ Deep inside of you ♪
  6721.  
  6722. 1530
  6723. 01:01:05,794 --> 01:01:07,727
  6724. ♪ Slide up her dress ♪
  6725.  
  6726. 1531
  6727. 01:01:07,729 --> 01:01:09,729
  6728. ♪ Shouts in darkness ♪
  6729.  
  6730. 1532
  6731. 01:01:09,731 --> 01:01:13,533
  6732. ♪ I'm so alive ♪
  6733.  
  6734. 1533
  6735. 01:01:13,535 --> 01:01:16,336
  6736. ♪ And I'm deep inside of you ♪
  6737.  
  6738. 1534
  6739. 01:01:16,338 --> 01:01:20,707
  6740. ♪ You said boy make
  6741. girl feel good ♪
  6742.  
  6743. 1535
  6744. 01:01:20,709 --> 01:01:24,044
  6745. ♪ But still, deep inside ♪
  6746.  
  6747. 1536
  6748. 01:01:24,046 --> 01:01:25,647
  6749. ♪ Still ♪
  6750.  
  6751. 1537
  6752. 01:01:27,249 --> 01:01:28,247
  6753. Okay, Kelly,
  6754.  
  6755. 1538
  6756. 01:01:28,249 --> 01:01:30,616
  6757. just one good, strong push.
  6758.  
  6759. 1539
  6760. 01:01:30,618 --> 01:01:32,051
  6761. Right, okay, okay.
  6762.  
  6763. 1540
  6764. 01:01:32,053 --> 01:01:34,053
  6765. I'm gonna push now.
  6766.  
  6767. 1541
  6768. 01:01:34,055 --> 01:01:35,724
  6769. - Ready?
  6770. - Push, push!
  6771.  
  6772. 1542
  6773. 01:01:43,064 --> 01:01:44,531
  6774. Richard!
  6775.  
  6776. 1543
  6777. 01:01:48,769 --> 01:01:52,071
  6778. Hi!
  6779.  
  6780. 1544
  6781. 01:01:52,073 --> 01:01:53,540
  6782. Aw, Kelly, you did it!
  6783.  
  6784. 1545
  6785. 01:02:09,223 --> 01:02:11,227
  6786. Hi, Joanna, it's Nick.
  6787.  
  6788. 1546
  6789. 01:02:12,359 --> 01:02:14,861
  6790. Yeah, we had some
  6791. unexpected diversions
  6792.  
  6793. 1547
  6794. 01:02:14,863 --> 01:02:17,165
  6795. but we're on our way now.
  6796.  
  6797. 1548
  6798. 01:02:18,133 --> 01:02:18,768
  6799. Who's we?
  6800.  
  6801. 1549
  6802. 01:02:20,102 --> 01:02:21,366
  6803. That's why I'm
  6804. calling you again.
  6805.  
  6806. 1550
  6807. 01:02:21,368 --> 01:02:22,836
  6808. I have to ask you something
  6809.  
  6810. 1551
  6811. 01:02:22,838 --> 01:02:26,506
  6812. before we waste
  6813. each other's time.
  6814.  
  6815. 1552
  6816. 01:02:26,508 --> 01:02:29,812
  6817. And forgive me for
  6818. being blunt about this.
  6819.  
  6820. 1553
  6821. 01:02:33,414 --> 01:02:36,816
  6822. Did you and I have a kid
  6823. together that I'm unaware of
  6824.  
  6825. 1554
  6826. 01:02:36,818 --> 01:02:39,522
  6827. that you gave up for adoption?
  6828.  
  6829. 1555
  6830. 01:02:56,437 --> 01:02:58,673
  6831. So what are we doing now?
  6832.  
  6833. 1556
  6834. 01:03:00,175 --> 01:03:02,778
  6835. We're gonna go
  6836. meet your mother.
  6837.  
  6838. 1557
  6839. 01:03:07,883 --> 01:03:09,318
  6840. Are you sleepy?
  6841.  
  6842. 1558
  6843. 01:03:10,519 --> 01:03:12,588
  6844. Look at the little hands.
  6845.  
  6846. 1559
  6847. 01:03:14,421 --> 01:03:16,455
  6848. Thank you for
  6849. being here with me.
  6850.  
  6851. 1560
  6852. 01:03:16,457 --> 01:03:17,689
  6853. And thank you for singing.
  6854.  
  6855. 1561
  6856. 01:03:17,691 --> 01:03:20,292
  6857. I'm very sorry I did
  6858. not know the words.
  6859.  
  6860. 1562
  6861. 01:03:20,294 --> 01:03:20,926
  6862. Was I horrible?
  6863.  
  6864. 1563
  6865. 01:03:20,928 --> 01:03:23,296
  6866. No, you were perfect.
  6867.  
  6868. 1564
  6869. 01:03:23,298 --> 01:03:25,198
  6870. She's so beautiful.
  6871.  
  6872. 1565
  6873. 01:03:25,200 --> 01:03:28,667
  6874. Yeah, this may prevent me
  6875.  
  6876. 1566
  6877. 01:03:28,669 --> 01:03:30,904
  6878. from being your maid
  6879. of honor on Sunday.
  6880.  
  6881. 1567
  6882. 01:03:30,906 --> 01:03:32,272
  6883. I'm not so sure
  6884. there's gonna be a need
  6885.  
  6886. 1568
  6887. 01:03:32,274 --> 01:03:33,906
  6888. for a maid of honor Sunday.
  6889.  
  6890. 1569
  6891. 01:03:33,908 --> 01:03:35,475
  6892. What?
  6893.  
  6894. 1570
  6895. 01:03:35,477 --> 01:03:39,611
  6896. Why, you're still gonna
  6897. marry Nick, aren't you?
  6898.  
  6899. 1571
  6900. 01:03:39,613 --> 01:03:41,617
  6901. So he has a lot of exes.
  6902.  
  6903. 1572
  6904. 01:03:43,185 --> 01:03:43,786
  6905. And he lied.
  6906.  
  6907. 1573
  6908. 01:03:44,752 --> 01:03:46,618
  6909. And he may have some
  6910. illegitimate children
  6911.  
  6912. 1574
  6913. 01:03:46,620 --> 01:03:51,626
  6914. you don't know about but
  6915. still, you two belong together.
  6916.  
  6917. 1575
  6918. 01:03:52,794 --> 01:03:54,629
  6919. Wait, what are
  6920. you talking about?
  6921.  
  6922. 1576
  6923. 01:03:56,531 --> 01:03:58,698
  6924. You just spent the last 48
  6925. hours trying to convince me
  6926.  
  6927. 1577
  6928. 01:03:58,700 --> 01:04:00,265
  6929. Nick is a monster.
  6930.  
  6931. 1578
  6932. 01:04:00,267 --> 01:04:02,935
  6933. What about protecting me?
  6934.  
  6935. 1579
  6936. 01:04:02,937 --> 01:04:03,771
  6937. Yeah.
  6938.  
  6939. 1580
  6940. 01:04:06,874 --> 01:04:09,709
  6941. I'm all done protecting you.
  6942.  
  6943. 1581
  6944. 01:04:09,711 --> 01:04:13,312
  6945. I have someone else
  6946. to protect now.
  6947.  
  6948. 1582
  6949. 01:04:13,314 --> 01:04:14,580
  6950. I did it, baby!
  6951.  
  6952. 1583
  6953. 01:04:14,582 --> 01:04:16,216
  6954. I made it to the
  6955. hospital, I'm here!
  6956.  
  6957. 1584
  6958. 01:04:16,218 --> 01:04:17,816
  6959. I'm coming!
  6960.  
  6961. 1585
  6962. 01:04:17,818 --> 01:04:18,850
  6963. Okay, love you.
  6964.  
  6965. 1586
  6966. 01:04:18,852 --> 01:04:19,986
  6967. I know!
  6968.  
  6969. 1587
  6970. 01:04:19,988 --> 01:04:21,323
  6971. I love you, too!
  6972.  
  6973. 1588
  6974. 01:04:23,258 --> 01:04:24,957
  6975. So Nick may have
  6976. sowed more seed
  6977.  
  6978. 1589
  6979. 01:04:24,959 --> 01:04:26,625
  6980. than John Deere in the past.
  6981.  
  6982. 1590
  6983. 01:04:26,627 --> 01:04:30,930
  6984. You are the one he chose to
  6985. spend the rest of his life with.
  6986.  
  6987. 1591
  6988. 01:04:30,932 --> 01:04:31,800
  6989. He loves you.
  6990.  
  6991. 1592
  6992. 01:04:36,238 --> 01:04:39,175
  6993. And I know that you are gonna
  6994. make the right decision.
  6995.  
  6996. 1593
  6997. 01:04:43,377 --> 01:04:44,877
  6998. Oh!
  6999.  
  7000. 1594
  7001. 01:04:44,879 --> 01:04:46,412
  7002. Sorry, I'm late.
  7003.  
  7004. 1595
  7005. 01:04:46,414 --> 01:04:47,846
  7006. Did I miss something?
  7007.  
  7008. 1596
  7009. 01:04:47,848 --> 01:04:50,015
  7010. You're so stupid.
  7011.  
  7012. 1597
  7013. 01:04:50,017 --> 01:04:51,618
  7014. Meet your daughter.
  7015.  
  7016. 1598
  7017. 01:04:51,620 --> 01:04:52,884
  7018. It's a girl?
  7019.  
  7020. 1599
  7021. 01:04:52,886 --> 01:04:54,921
  7022. Stephanie Jenkins Kowalski.
  7023.  
  7024. 1600
  7025. 01:04:54,923 --> 01:04:56,457
  7026. Oh!
  7027.  
  7028. 1601
  7029. 01:05:00,495 --> 01:05:02,397
  7030. She's totally asleep.
  7031.  
  7032. 1602
  7033. 01:05:18,345 --> 01:05:19,948
  7034. This is it, 305.
  7035.  
  7036. 1603
  7037. 01:05:25,787 --> 01:05:26,852
  7038. You ready?
  7039.  
  7040. 1604
  7041. 01:05:26,854 --> 01:05:28,654
  7042. I think so.
  7043.  
  7044. 1605
  7045. 01:05:28,656 --> 01:05:29,892
  7046. Come on then.
  7047.  
  7048. 1606
  7049. 01:05:34,328 --> 01:05:35,560
  7050. It's gonna be okay.
  7051.  
  7052. 1607
  7053. 01:05:35,562 --> 01:05:37,497
  7054. This is what you've
  7055. been waiting for.
  7056.  
  7057. 1608
  7058. 01:05:37,499 --> 01:05:39,432
  7059. Yeah, I'm just
  7060. a little nervous.
  7061.  
  7062. 1609
  7063. 01:05:39,434 --> 01:05:40,269
  7064. Me too.
  7065.  
  7066. 1610
  7067. 01:05:43,838 --> 01:05:45,404
  7068. Stand up straight.
  7069.  
  7070. 1611
  7071. 01:05:45,406 --> 01:05:47,874
  7072. First impressions are
  7073. essential to new relationships,
  7074.  
  7075. 1612
  7076. 01:05:47,876 --> 01:05:49,011
  7077. don't you think?
  7078.  
  7079. 1613
  7080. 01:05:52,479 --> 01:05:55,848
  7081. Well, it took you long enough.
  7082.  
  7083. 1614
  7084. 01:05:55,850 --> 01:05:57,582
  7085. Look at you, Nick.
  7086.  
  7087. 1615
  7088. 01:05:57,584 --> 01:05:58,817
  7089. You look like the
  7090. same self-centered ass
  7091.  
  7092. 1616
  7093. 01:05:58,819 --> 01:06:01,020
  7094. I fell for all those years ago.
  7095.  
  7096. 1617
  7097. 01:06:01,022 --> 01:06:04,026
  7098. You haven't changed
  7099. a bit, have you?
  7100.  
  7101. 1618
  7102. 01:06:05,493 --> 01:06:06,328
  7103. This him?
  7104.  
  7105. 1619
  7106. 01:06:07,629 --> 01:06:08,928
  7107. What is his name again?
  7108.  
  7109. 1620
  7110. 01:06:08,930 --> 01:06:10,363
  7111. My name's Mason.
  7112.  
  7113. 1621
  7114. 01:06:10,365 --> 01:06:11,798
  7115. It's nice to meet you.
  7116.  
  7117. 1622
  7118. 01:06:11,800 --> 01:06:13,098
  7119. Mason?
  7120.  
  7121. 1623
  7122. 01:06:13,100 --> 01:06:15,100
  7123. Did I name you that?
  7124.  
  7125. 1624
  7126. 01:06:15,102 --> 01:06:16,868
  7127. What kind of name is Mason?
  7128.  
  7129. 1625
  7130. 01:06:16,870 --> 01:06:19,971
  7131. Like a cartoon
  7132. moose or something.
  7133.  
  7134. 1626
  7135. 01:06:19,973 --> 01:06:21,743
  7136. You know what I mean?
  7137.  
  7138. 1627
  7139. 01:06:23,044 --> 01:06:24,042
  7140. I'm kidding, it's cute.
  7141.  
  7142. 1628
  7143. 01:06:24,044 --> 01:06:27,615
  7144. Come on in, meet your
  7145. brothers and sisters.
  7146.  
  7147. 1629
  7148. 01:06:31,986 --> 01:06:33,022
  7149. Hey!
  7150.  
  7151. 1630
  7152. 01:06:37,492 --> 01:06:38,924
  7153. Mason, I don't know
  7154. if you ate, hon.
  7155.  
  7156. 1631
  7157. 01:06:38,926 --> 01:06:43,395
  7158. We have Easy Mac or
  7159. Cap'n Crunch if you want.
  7160.  
  7161. 1632
  7162. 01:06:43,397 --> 01:06:44,730
  7163. I'm okay, thanks.
  7164.  
  7165. 1633
  7166. 01:06:44,732 --> 01:06:45,564
  7167. Okay.
  7168.  
  7169. 1634
  7170. 01:06:45,566 --> 01:06:47,435
  7171. Hey, listen up.
  7172.  
  7173. 1635
  7174. 01:06:50,372 --> 01:06:52,372
  7175. This is Mason, he's
  7176. your new brother.
  7177.  
  7178. 1636
  7179. 01:06:52,374 --> 01:06:55,077
  7180. This is Frankie,
  7181. Lenny, Johnny and,
  7182.  
  7183. 1637
  7184. 01:06:56,877 --> 01:06:57,713
  7185. Todd.
  7186.  
  7187. 1638
  7188. 01:06:59,080 --> 01:07:01,413
  7189. I was going to meetings
  7190. when I had him, so.
  7191.  
  7192. 1639
  7193. 01:07:01,415 --> 01:07:03,816
  7194. So this little cutie is Rachel.
  7195.  
  7196. 1640
  7197. 01:07:03,818 --> 01:07:05,084
  7198. Can you say hello?
  7199.  
  7200. 1641
  7201. 01:07:05,086 --> 01:07:06,451
  7202. Yeah.
  7203.  
  7204. 1642
  7205. 01:07:06,453 --> 01:07:08,120
  7206. Where's their dad?
  7207.  
  7208. 1643
  7209. 01:07:08,122 --> 01:07:11,457
  7210. Lock-up, rehab, shacked up
  7211. with a pole dancer in Barstow
  7212.  
  7213. 1644
  7214. 01:07:11,459 --> 01:07:13,058
  7215. and buried in Texas.
  7216.  
  7217. 1645
  7218. 01:07:13,060 --> 01:07:14,993
  7219. But we don't talk about that.
  7220.  
  7221. 1646
  7222. 01:07:14,995 --> 01:07:17,397
  7223. Frankie, here, take your sister.
  7224.  
  7225. 1647
  7226. 01:07:17,399 --> 01:07:20,031
  7227. Get that crap out of your hair.
  7228.  
  7229. 1648
  7230. 01:07:20,033 --> 01:07:21,002
  7231. Get her a toy.
  7232.  
  7233. 1649
  7234. 01:07:22,636 --> 01:07:24,035
  7235. Mason, why don't you sit
  7236. with the boys and watch TV
  7237.  
  7238. 1650
  7239. 01:07:24,037 --> 01:07:26,439
  7240. while your daddy and I
  7241. have a little talk, okay?
  7242.  
  7243. 1651
  7244. 01:07:26,441 --> 01:07:28,042
  7245. Yeah, yeah, sure.
  7246.  
  7247. 1652
  7248. 01:07:33,180 --> 01:07:34,015
  7249. Hey, guys.
  7250.  
  7251. 1653
  7252. 01:07:43,057 --> 01:07:44,689
  7253. All right, I'll take him.
  7254.  
  7255. 1654
  7256. 01:07:44,691 --> 01:07:46,426
  7257. You'll take him?
  7258.  
  7259. 1655
  7260. 01:07:46,428 --> 01:07:49,629
  7261. Yeah, that's why you came
  7262. all the way here, isn't it?
  7263.  
  7264. 1656
  7265. 01:07:49,631 --> 01:07:52,131
  7266. Obviously you don't want him.
  7267.  
  7268. 1657
  7269. 01:07:52,133 --> 01:07:56,071
  7270. Well, it's not that I
  7271. don't want him, I just
  7272.  
  7273. 1658
  7274. 01:07:56,905 --> 01:07:57,870
  7275. have my reasons.
  7276.  
  7277. 1659
  7278. 01:07:57,872 --> 01:07:58,671
  7279. Oh, yeah, sure.
  7280.  
  7281. 1660
  7282. 01:07:58,673 --> 01:08:00,508
  7283. You boys always
  7284. have your reasons.
  7285.  
  7286. 1661
  7287. 01:08:03,678 --> 01:08:05,381
  7288. Why didn't you ever tell me?
  7289.  
  7290. 1662
  7291. 01:08:07,582 --> 01:08:09,417
  7292. You were gone, Nick.
  7293.  
  7294. 1663
  7295. 01:08:11,653 --> 01:08:13,185
  7296. You disappeared on me.
  7297.  
  7298. 1664
  7299. 01:08:13,187 --> 01:08:17,223
  7300. No goodbye, no good luck,
  7301. not even a good riddance.
  7302.  
  7303. 1665
  7304. 01:08:17,225 --> 01:08:18,590
  7305. I'm sorry.
  7306.  
  7307. 1666
  7308. 01:08:18,592 --> 01:08:19,892
  7309. Oh, no.
  7310.  
  7311. 1667
  7312. 01:08:19,894 --> 01:08:22,562
  7313. I'm sure you had your reasons.
  7314.  
  7315. 1668
  7316. 01:08:22,564 --> 01:08:23,464
  7317. I had mine.
  7318.  
  7319. 1669
  7320. 01:08:25,467 --> 01:08:28,036
  7321. I was young, scared, alone.
  7322.  
  7323. 1670
  7324. 01:08:31,172 --> 01:08:33,505
  7325. I couldn't even afford a phone.
  7326.  
  7327. 1671
  7328. 01:08:33,507 --> 01:08:35,843
  7329. So, you know, I gave him up.
  7330.  
  7331. 1672
  7332. 01:08:36,977 --> 01:08:38,710
  7333. I felt so damned
  7334. guilty about it,
  7335.  
  7336. 1673
  7337. 01:08:38,712 --> 01:08:41,883
  7338. I vowed never to
  7339. give up a baby again.
  7340.  
  7341. 1674
  7342. 01:08:43,016 --> 01:08:45,987
  7343. You can see how well
  7344. that turned out.
  7345.  
  7346. 1675
  7347. 01:08:47,187 --> 01:08:50,755
  7348. I'm sorry, I can't imagine
  7349. how hard it would be to
  7350.  
  7351. 1676
  7352. 01:08:50,757 --> 01:08:52,994
  7353. raise all those kids alone.
  7354.  
  7355. 1677
  7356. 01:08:54,229 --> 01:08:56,127
  7357. Oh, well, at least he's old
  7358. enough to get a work permit.
  7359.  
  7360. 1678
  7361. 01:08:56,129 --> 01:08:59,197
  7362. If nothing else, he'll be
  7363. another source of income.
  7364.  
  7365. 1679
  7366. 01:08:59,199 --> 01:09:02,734
  7367. Listen, I fully intend to
  7368. contribute to his well-being so.
  7369.  
  7370. 1680
  7371. 01:09:02,736 --> 01:09:05,971
  7372. Yeah, oh, yeah, you
  7373. will be doing that, too.
  7374.  
  7375. 1681
  7376. 01:09:05,973 --> 01:09:07,572
  7377. I'm sure you can afford it
  7378.  
  7379. 1682
  7380. 01:09:07,574 --> 01:09:11,176
  7381. being you're the famous
  7382. kid-hater and all that.
  7383.  
  7384. 1683
  7385. 01:09:11,178 --> 01:09:13,813
  7386. You should follow
  7387. me around for a day.
  7388.  
  7389. 1684
  7390. 01:09:13,815 --> 01:09:16,118
  7391. You'd get some great material.
  7392.  
  7393. 1685
  7394. 01:09:17,150 --> 01:09:17,985
  7395. Seriously.
  7396.  
  7397. 1686
  7398. 01:09:24,792 --> 01:09:25,992
  7399. All right, I'm curious.
  7400.  
  7401. 1687
  7402. 01:09:25,994 --> 01:09:28,126
  7403. What are your reasons
  7404. this time around?
  7405.  
  7406. 1688
  7407. 01:09:28,128 --> 01:09:32,063
  7408. Well, for one thing, I'm
  7409. getting married on Sunday.
  7410.  
  7411. 1689
  7412. 01:09:32,065 --> 01:09:34,200
  7413. Congratulations.
  7414.  
  7415. 1690
  7416. 01:09:34,202 --> 01:09:35,635
  7417. Let me guess.
  7418.  
  7419. 1691
  7420. 01:09:35,637 --> 01:09:37,169
  7421. She's a total peach
  7422. with a rocking body
  7423.  
  7424. 1692
  7425. 01:09:37,171 --> 01:09:40,139
  7426. and a personality so
  7427. sunny she blooms daffodils
  7428.  
  7429. 1693
  7430. 01:09:40,141 --> 01:09:41,741
  7431. right outta her ass.
  7432.  
  7433. 1694
  7434. 01:09:41,743 --> 01:09:42,577
  7435. Hey.
  7436.  
  7437. 1695
  7438. 01:09:45,579 --> 01:09:48,850
  7439. She doesn't know
  7440. about him, does she?
  7441.  
  7442. 1696
  7443. 01:09:54,556 --> 01:09:55,757
  7444. That's rich, man.
  7445.  
  7446. 1697
  7447. 01:09:58,126 --> 01:09:59,858
  7448. Nothing like starting
  7449. a lifelong commitment
  7450.  
  7451. 1698
  7452. 01:09:59,860 --> 01:10:01,696
  7453. with a big fat secret.
  7454.  
  7455. 1699
  7456. 01:10:06,700 --> 01:10:08,870
  7457. Good luck with that, Nick.
  7458.  
  7459. 1700
  7460. 01:10:10,305 --> 01:10:14,307
  7461. Mom, Lenny and Johnny are
  7462. tattooing the baby again!
  7463.  
  7464. 1701
  7465. 01:10:14,309 --> 01:10:15,640
  7466. Oh, for Christ sake!
  7467.  
  7468. 1702
  7469. 01:10:15,642 --> 01:10:17,343
  7470. You little monsters!
  7471.  
  7472. 1703
  7473. 01:10:17,345 --> 01:10:21,279
  7474. What have I told you about
  7475. drawing on the baby, huh?
  7476.  
  7477. 1704
  7478. 01:10:21,281 --> 01:10:23,316
  7479. This is permanent marker!
  7480.  
  7481. 1705
  7482. 01:10:23,318 --> 01:10:25,587
  7483. What is wrong with you two?
  7484.  
  7485. 1706
  7486. 01:10:29,324 --> 01:10:32,094
  7487. Everybody go to bed right now!
  7488.  
  7489. 1707
  7490. 01:10:37,598 --> 01:10:38,363
  7491. Well, that's another two weeks
  7492.  
  7493. 1708
  7494. 01:10:38,365 --> 01:10:40,099
  7495. I can't take her out in public.
  7496.  
  7497. 1709
  7498. 01:10:40,101 --> 01:10:41,834
  7499. I know, I know, honey.
  7500.  
  7501. 1710
  7502. 01:10:41,836 --> 01:10:44,737
  7503. Frankie, go get the air
  7504. mattress out of the shed.
  7505.  
  7506. 1711
  7507. 01:10:44,739 --> 01:10:45,938
  7508. I'm putting Mason
  7509. in with you three.
  7510.  
  7511. 1712
  7512. 01:10:45,940 --> 01:10:47,005
  7513. Oh, come on!
  7514.  
  7515. 1713
  7516. 01:10:47,007 --> 01:10:47,974
  7517. There no room in there as it...
  7518.  
  7519. 1714
  7520. 01:10:47,976 --> 01:10:50,276
  7521. Hey, do not back talk me.
  7522.  
  7523. 1715
  7524. 01:10:50,278 --> 01:10:53,748
  7525. It's fine, I'll just
  7526. sleep on the couch.
  7527.  
  7528. 1716
  7529. 01:10:55,048 --> 01:10:56,081
  7530. Well, thank you, Mason.
  7531.  
  7532. 1717
  7533. 01:10:56,083 --> 01:10:57,617
  7534. That's very helpful.
  7535.  
  7536. 1718
  7537. 01:10:57,619 --> 01:10:58,350
  7538. I gotta go clean her up.
  7539.  
  7540. 1719
  7541. 01:10:58,352 --> 01:11:00,721
  7542. Say goodbye to your father.
  7543.  
  7544. 1720
  7545. 01:11:08,629 --> 01:11:10,328
  7546. I'd just
  7547. like to say thank you.
  7548.  
  7549. 1721
  7550. 01:11:10,330 --> 01:11:11,997
  7551. For what?
  7552.  
  7553. 1722
  7554. 01:11:11,999 --> 01:11:15,701
  7555. For keeping your promise
  7556. and helping me find my mother.
  7557.  
  7558. 1723
  7559. 01:11:15,703 --> 01:11:17,138
  7560. You're welcome.
  7561.  
  7562. 1724
  7563. 01:11:18,338 --> 01:11:19,574
  7564. Listen.
  7565.  
  7566. 1725
  7567. 01:11:21,909 --> 01:11:24,212
  7568. Is there anything you need or,
  7569.  
  7570. 1726
  7571. 01:11:26,047 --> 01:11:27,013
  7572. anything I can...
  7573.  
  7574. 1727
  7575. 01:11:27,015 --> 01:11:28,584
  7576. No, I'll be fine.
  7577.  
  7578. 1728
  7579. 01:11:29,984 --> 01:11:32,318
  7580. I told you, all I wanted
  7581. from you was this one thing
  7582.  
  7583. 1729
  7584. 01:11:32,320 --> 01:11:33,885
  7585. and you did it.
  7586.  
  7587. 1730
  7588. 01:11:33,887 --> 01:11:36,824
  7589. Now you can go off
  7590. and get married.
  7591.  
  7592. 1731
  7593. 01:11:38,258 --> 01:11:40,259
  7594. Yeah, well, that seems kinda
  7595. questionable at this point.
  7596.  
  7597. 1732
  7598. 01:11:40,261 --> 01:11:41,661
  7599. Why?
  7600.  
  7601. 1733
  7602. 01:11:41,663 --> 01:11:42,894
  7603. I thought once I
  7604. was out of the way,
  7605.  
  7606. 1734
  7607. 01:11:42,896 --> 01:11:44,663
  7608. you'd be free to get married.
  7609.  
  7610. 1735
  7611. 01:11:44,665 --> 01:11:46,264
  7612. Well, it seemed
  7613. that way last night
  7614.  
  7615. 1736
  7616. 01:11:46,266 --> 01:11:50,037
  7617. but this has been a very,
  7618. very, very long day.
  7619.  
  7620. 1737
  7621. 01:11:52,440 --> 01:11:53,272
  7622. Are you all right?
  7623.  
  7624. 1738
  7625. 01:11:53,274 --> 01:11:54,843
  7626. What are you doing?
  7627.  
  7628. 1739
  7629. 01:11:56,244 --> 01:11:58,044
  7630. I'm calling on my
  7631. own psychic powers
  7632.  
  7633. 1740
  7634. 01:11:58,046 --> 01:12:00,248
  7635. to see how things turn out.
  7636.  
  7637. 1741
  7638. 01:12:03,985 --> 01:12:05,417
  7639. Well?
  7640.  
  7641. 1742
  7642. 01:12:05,419 --> 01:12:06,622
  7643. Well what?
  7644.  
  7645. 1743
  7646. 01:12:07,623 --> 01:12:10,423
  7647. Well, aren't you gonna
  7648. tell me what's in store?
  7649.  
  7650. 1744
  7651. 01:12:10,425 --> 01:12:11,389
  7652. Heck, no.
  7653.  
  7654. 1745
  7655. 01:12:11,391 --> 01:12:13,160
  7656. That'd be cheating.
  7657.  
  7658. 1746
  7659. 01:12:14,227 --> 01:12:15,663
  7660. What a rip-off.
  7661.  
  7662. 1747
  7663. 01:12:57,504 --> 01:12:58,470
  7664. Well, I mean, this seemed like
  7665.  
  7666. 1748
  7667. 01:12:58,472 --> 01:13:00,371
  7668. the perfect moment to say it.
  7669.  
  7670. 1749
  7671. 01:13:00,373 --> 01:13:01,976
  7672. You're my father.
  7673.  
  7674. 1750
  7675. 01:13:07,981 --> 01:13:10,349
  7676. Is there any way I could take
  7677. a piece of that for the road?
  7678.  
  7679. 1751
  7680. 01:13:11,985 --> 01:13:13,318
  7681. When was the last time
  7682. you had your radar gun
  7683.  
  7684. 1752
  7685. 01:13:13,320 --> 01:13:15,487
  7686. calibrated for accuracy?
  7687.  
  7688. 1753
  7689. 01:13:15,489 --> 01:13:16,622
  7690. Are you a ninja?
  7691.  
  7692. 1754
  7693. 01:13:16,624 --> 01:13:20,192
  7694. I knew I had met the man
  7695. of my dreams when he spoke
  7696.  
  7697. 1755
  7698. 01:13:20,194 --> 01:13:24,031
  7699. these three precious
  7700. words to me, I hate kids.
  7701.  
  7702. 1756
  7703. 01:13:26,967 --> 01:13:29,268
  7704. So, what is that thing anyway?
  7705.  
  7706. 1757
  7707. 01:13:29,270 --> 01:13:30,803
  7708. It's a fidget spinner.
  7709.  
  7710. 1758
  7711. 01:13:30,805 --> 01:13:32,071
  7712. It helps keep me calm.
  7713.  
  7714. 1759
  7715. 01:13:32,073 --> 01:13:33,005
  7716. Oh, yeah?
  7717.  
  7718. 1760
  7719. 01:13:33,007 --> 01:13:35,077
  7720. I could use one of those.
  7721.  
  7722. 1761
  7723. 01:14:02,136 --> 01:14:03,434
  7724. Hi.
  7725.  
  7726. 1762
  7727. 01:14:03,436 --> 01:14:04,472
  7728. Hi.
  7729.  
  7730. 1763
  7731. 01:14:13,013 --> 01:14:14,246
  7732. Thanks for coming by.
  7733.  
  7734. 1764
  7735. 01:14:14,248 --> 01:14:18,050
  7736. It was at the top of
  7737. my to-do list today.
  7738.  
  7739. 1765
  7740. 01:14:18,052 --> 01:14:21,123
  7741. How was the lecture
  7742. in Santa Barbara?
  7743.  
  7744. 1766
  7745. 01:14:25,092 --> 01:14:27,126
  7746. There was no lecture.
  7747.  
  7748. 1767
  7749. 01:14:27,128 --> 01:14:28,560
  7750. I know.
  7751.  
  7752. 1768
  7753. 01:14:28,562 --> 01:14:29,429
  7754. We need to have a serious...
  7755.  
  7756. 1769
  7757. 01:14:29,431 --> 01:14:31,831
  7758. I'm calling off
  7759. the wedding, Nick.
  7760.  
  7761. 1770
  7762. 01:14:31,833 --> 01:14:32,665
  7763. That's what I was gonna do.
  7764.  
  7765. 1771
  7766. 01:14:32,667 --> 01:14:35,099
  7767. Well, it's too
  7768. late, I just did it.
  7769.  
  7770. 1772
  7771. 01:14:35,101 --> 01:14:36,434
  7772. Yeah, I heard that.
  7773.  
  7774. 1773
  7775. 01:14:36,436 --> 01:14:37,670
  7776. Why were you
  7777. gonna call it off?
  7778.  
  7779. 1774
  7780. 01:14:37,672 --> 01:14:40,505
  7781. Oh, no, you called it off
  7782. first, you gotta say why first.
  7783.  
  7784. 1775
  7785. 01:14:40,507 --> 01:14:43,075
  7786. Well, I first considered it
  7787.  
  7788. 1776
  7789. 01:14:43,077 --> 01:14:44,910
  7790. when I found out
  7791. there wasn't a lecture
  7792.  
  7793. 1777
  7794. 01:14:44,912 --> 01:14:47,315
  7795. in Santa Barbara or wherever.
  7796.  
  7797. 1778
  7798. 01:14:48,248 --> 01:14:49,081
  7799. That's what did it?
  7800.  
  7801. 1779
  7802. 01:14:49,083 --> 01:14:50,482
  7803. No.
  7804.  
  7805. 1780
  7806. 01:14:50,484 --> 01:14:52,518
  7807. And then I found this
  7808. giant box of girlfriends
  7809.  
  7810. 1781
  7811. 01:14:52,520 --> 01:14:54,586
  7812. which was horrifying.
  7813.  
  7814. 1782
  7815. 01:14:54,588 --> 01:14:57,255
  7816. How did you ever find
  7817. time to write a book?
  7818.  
  7819. 1783
  7820. 01:14:57,257 --> 01:14:58,590
  7821. So that's why
  7822. you're calling it off?
  7823.  
  7824. 1784
  7825. 01:14:58,592 --> 01:14:59,425
  7826. No.
  7827.  
  7828. 1785
  7829. 01:14:59,427 --> 01:15:00,492
  7830. No?
  7831.  
  7832. 1786
  7833. 01:15:00,494 --> 01:15:02,594
  7834. It wasn't your
  7835. lying in the present
  7836.  
  7837. 1787
  7838. 01:15:02,596 --> 01:15:06,497
  7839. and it wasn't my
  7840. trolling around the past.
  7841.  
  7842. 1788
  7843. 01:15:06,499 --> 01:15:08,537
  7844. It's about the future.
  7845.  
  7846. 1789
  7847. 01:15:10,070 --> 01:15:11,336
  7848. You don't want to marry me
  7849.  
  7850. 1790
  7851. 01:15:11,338 --> 01:15:12,604
  7852. because of something
  7853. I haven't done yet?
  7854.  
  7855. 1791
  7856. 01:15:12,606 --> 01:15:14,639
  7857. It's not about you, Nick.
  7858.  
  7859. 1792
  7860. 01:15:14,641 --> 01:15:16,207
  7861. It's about me.
  7862.  
  7863. 1793
  7864. 01:15:16,209 --> 01:15:17,443
  7865. You don't want to marry me
  7866.  
  7867. 1794
  7868. 01:15:17,445 --> 01:15:20,549
  7869. because of something
  7870. you haven't done yet?
  7871.  
  7872. 1795
  7873. 01:15:22,115 --> 01:15:24,019
  7874. I've changed my mind.
  7875.  
  7876. 1796
  7877. 01:15:25,586 --> 01:15:27,823
  7878. I wanna have a family.
  7879.  
  7880. 1797
  7881. 01:15:28,890 --> 01:15:29,891
  7882. I want kids.
  7883.  
  7884. 1798
  7885. 01:15:33,494 --> 01:15:34,893
  7886. Nick.
  7887.  
  7888. 1799
  7889. 01:15:34,895 --> 01:15:37,563
  7890. You need to trust me, Sydney.
  7891.  
  7892. 1800
  7893. 01:15:37,565 --> 01:15:42,201
  7894. I've loved you since the
  7895. first time I saw you.
  7896.  
  7897. 1801
  7898. 01:15:42,203 --> 01:15:45,603
  7899. I love you with every
  7900. molecule of my being.
  7901.  
  7902. 1802
  7903. 01:15:45,605 --> 01:15:48,510
  7904. I don't wanna be
  7905. without you, ever.
  7906.  
  7907. 1803
  7908. 01:15:50,311 --> 01:15:52,210
  7909. You believe that, right?
  7910.  
  7911. 1804
  7912. 01:15:52,212 --> 01:15:53,912
  7913. Yes.
  7914.  
  7915. 1805
  7916. 01:15:53,914 --> 01:15:56,081
  7917. Then come with me.
  7918.  
  7919. 1806
  7920. 01:15:56,083 --> 01:15:57,619
  7921. Where are we going?
  7922.  
  7923. 1807
  7924. 01:15:58,686 --> 01:16:01,319
  7925. I can't undo
  7926. everything in my past
  7927.  
  7928. 1808
  7929. 01:16:01,321 --> 01:16:03,421
  7930. but there is one thing
  7931. that I can change.
  7932.  
  7933. 1809
  7934. 01:16:03,423 --> 01:16:04,258
  7935. Come on.
  7936.  
  7937. 1810
  7938. 01:16:23,476 --> 01:16:25,544
  7939. I'm gonna
  7940. get you, Johnny!
  7941.  
  7942. 1811
  7943. 01:16:25,546 --> 01:16:26,481
  7944. Hey, hey!
  7945.  
  7946. 1812
  7947. 01:16:34,020 --> 01:16:35,122
  7948. Hello, Nick.
  7949.  
  7950. 1813
  7951. 01:16:40,226 --> 01:16:41,960
  7952. This must be daffodil.
  7953.  
  7954. 1814
  7955. 01:16:41,962 --> 01:16:43,163
  7956. Hi, I'm Sydney.
  7957.  
  7958. 1815
  7959. 01:16:44,699 --> 01:16:46,197
  7960. Please.
  7961.  
  7962. 1816
  7963. 01:16:46,199 --> 01:16:47,599
  7964. You forget something?
  7965.  
  7966. 1817
  7967. 01:16:47,601 --> 01:16:50,202
  7968. I want Mason back.
  7969.  
  7970. 1818
  7971. 01:16:50,204 --> 01:16:52,537
  7972. Really, what happened?
  7973.  
  7974. 1819
  7975. 01:16:52,539 --> 01:16:55,541
  7976. You feel guilty for a change?
  7977.  
  7978. 1820
  7979. 01:16:55,543 --> 01:16:57,445
  7980. What's it like for you?
  7981.  
  7982. 1821
  7983. 01:16:58,678 --> 01:16:59,978
  7984. Just get him.
  7985.  
  7986. 1822
  7987. 01:16:59,980 --> 01:17:02,715
  7988. Oh, I would love
  7989. to but he's gone.
  7990.  
  7991. 1823
  7992. 01:17:02,717 --> 01:17:03,648
  7993. Gone?
  7994.  
  7995. 1824
  7996. 01:17:03,650 --> 01:17:05,384
  7997. What do you mean he's gone?
  7998.  
  7999. 1825
  8000. 01:17:05,386 --> 01:17:06,417
  8001. He snuck out in the
  8002. middle of the night.
  8003.  
  8004. 1826
  8005. 01:17:06,419 --> 01:17:07,618
  8006. Just up and left.
  8007.  
  8008. 1827
  8009. 01:17:07,620 --> 01:17:11,357
  8010. Not a goodbye, not a good
  8011. luck, not even a good riddance.
  8012.  
  8013. 1828
  8014. 01:17:11,359 --> 01:17:12,558
  8015. Congratulations, Nick,
  8016.  
  8017. 1829
  8018. 01:17:12,560 --> 01:17:14,727
  8019. he turned out to be
  8020. just like you after all.
  8021.  
  8022. 1830
  8023. 01:17:14,729 --> 01:17:16,761
  8024. Well, don't you have
  8025. any idea where he is?
  8026.  
  8027. 1831
  8028. 01:17:16,763 --> 01:17:18,967
  8029. What do I look
  8030. like a mind reader?
  8031.  
  8032. 1832
  8033. 01:17:22,602 --> 01:17:24,702
  8034. I'm getting an A.
  8035.  
  8036. 1833
  8037. 01:17:24,704 --> 01:17:26,140
  8038. A really big A.
  8039.  
  8040. 1834
  8041. 01:17:29,243 --> 01:17:30,078
  8042. Nick?
  8043.  
  8044. 1835
  8045. 01:17:36,717 --> 01:17:39,350
  8046. I know how to find him.
  8047.  
  8048. 1836
  8049. 01:17:39,352 --> 01:17:42,453
  8050. We, the gifted, face
  8051. insurmountable odds
  8052.  
  8053. 1837
  8054. 01:17:42,455 --> 01:17:44,756
  8055. in a world that continues
  8056. to lean in favor
  8057.  
  8058. 1838
  8059. 01:17:44,758 --> 01:17:47,494
  8060. of dark skepticism
  8061. and disbelief.
  8062.  
  8063. 1839
  8064. 01:17:49,430 --> 01:17:51,796
  8065. For centuries, we were
  8066. heralded and praised,
  8067.  
  8068. 1840
  8069. 01:17:51,798 --> 01:17:55,033
  8070. even worshipped
  8071. for our abilities.
  8072.  
  8073. 1841
  8074. 01:17:55,035 --> 01:17:57,402
  8075. But in these troubled
  8076. times, when what we provide
  8077.  
  8078. 1842
  8079. 01:17:57,404 --> 01:17:59,571
  8080. comfort and hope
  8081. are needed the most,
  8082.  
  8083. 1843
  8084. 01:17:59,573 --> 01:18:02,741
  8085. we are shunned,
  8086. vilified, even hunted
  8087.  
  8088. 1844
  8089. 01:18:02,743 --> 01:18:07,246
  8090. by those who cannot see
  8091. past their own fears.
  8092.  
  8093. 1845
  8094. 01:18:07,248 --> 01:18:10,049
  8095. We all know that when
  8096. things become their worst,
  8097.  
  8098. 1846
  8099. 01:18:10,051 --> 01:18:12,317
  8100. when what is desperately
  8101. sought cannot be found
  8102.  
  8103. 1847
  8104. 01:18:12,319 --> 01:18:16,487
  8105. by traditional means, that is
  8106. when skeptics bow their heads
  8107.  
  8108. 1848
  8109. 01:18:16,489 --> 01:18:19,426
  8110. and concede to
  8111. their lack of sight.
  8112.  
  8113. 1849
  8114. 01:18:20,628 --> 01:18:21,696
  8115. How delightful!
  8116.  
  8117. 1850
  8118. 01:18:24,065 --> 01:18:27,066
  8119. I just love the smell of
  8120. humble pie, don't you?
  8121.  
  8122. 1851
  8123. 01:18:28,769 --> 01:18:30,234
  8124. At this time, Mr. Sparkles and I
  8125.  
  8126. 1852
  8127. 01:18:30,236 --> 01:18:31,769
  8128. will be entertaining
  8129. your questions.
  8130.  
  8131. 1853
  8132. 01:18:31,771 --> 01:18:35,773
  8133. Just step right up to
  8134. the mic and ask away.
  8135.  
  8136. 1854
  8137. 01:18:35,775 --> 01:18:38,109
  8138. Go on, don't be skittish.
  8139.  
  8140. 1855
  8141. 01:18:38,111 --> 01:18:38,747
  8142. Anyone?
  8143.  
  8144. 1856
  8145. 01:18:39,779 --> 01:18:42,346
  8146. No one have, of course.
  8147.  
  8148. 1857
  8149. 01:18:42,348 --> 01:18:43,816
  8150. If you are as gifted as I am,
  8151.  
  8152. 1858
  8153. 01:18:43,818 --> 01:18:47,219
  8154. you already know the
  8155. answers, don't you?
  8156.  
  8157. 1859
  8158. 01:18:47,221 --> 01:18:48,519
  8159. Well, let's saunter
  8160. over to the pool
  8161.  
  8162. 1860
  8163. 01:18:48,521 --> 01:18:50,456
  8164. for the pyrokinetic
  8165. meet and greet.
  8166.  
  8167. 1861
  8168. 01:18:50,458 --> 01:18:51,689
  8169. In response to last
  8170. year's faux pas,
  8171.  
  8172. 1862
  8173. 01:18:51,691 --> 01:18:53,425
  8174. I'm told there's much
  8175. more fire extinguishers
  8176.  
  8177. 1863
  8178. 01:18:53,427 --> 01:18:55,030
  8179. this time around.
  8180.  
  8181. 1864
  8182. 01:18:56,129 --> 01:18:57,798
  8183. I have a question.
  8184.  
  8185. 1865
  8186. 01:18:59,100 --> 01:19:02,300
  8187. Isn't it true that
  8188. you're a fraud?
  8189.  
  8190. 1866
  8191. 01:19:02,302 --> 01:19:03,535
  8192. I beg your pardon?
  8193.  
  8194. 1867
  8195. 01:19:03,537 --> 01:19:05,470
  8196. Didn't you admit
  8197. to me just yesterday
  8198.  
  8199. 1868
  8200. 01:19:05,472 --> 01:19:09,640
  8201. that your entire career was
  8202. forged from being an imposter?
  8203.  
  8204. 1869
  8205. 01:19:09,642 --> 01:19:10,742
  8206. Guards, will you
  8207. escort this barbarian
  8208.  
  8209. 1870
  8210. 01:19:10,744 --> 01:19:12,643
  8211. off the premises, please?
  8212.  
  8213. 1871
  8214. 01:19:12,645 --> 01:19:13,478
  8215. What are you doing?
  8216.  
  8217. 1872
  8218. 01:19:13,480 --> 01:19:14,412
  8219. All right then...
  8220.  
  8221. 1873
  8222. 01:19:14,414 --> 01:19:16,115
  8223. Sir, you need to come with us.
  8224.  
  8225. 1874
  8226. 01:19:16,117 --> 01:19:17,215
  8227. All right, I challenge you
  8228. in front of all your peers
  8229.  
  8230. 1875
  8231. 01:19:17,217 --> 01:19:20,685
  8232. to prove that you
  8233. are not a fake!
  8234.  
  8235. 1876
  8236. 01:19:20,687 --> 01:19:22,487
  8237. How do you suppose I do that?
  8238.  
  8239. 1877
  8240. 01:19:22,489 --> 01:19:23,657
  8241. Find my son.
  8242.  
  8243. 1878
  8244. 01:19:25,258 --> 01:19:26,492
  8245. Right now.
  8246.  
  8247. 1879
  8248. 01:19:26,494 --> 01:19:29,731
  8249. You found me for him,
  8250. now find him for me.
  8251.  
  8252. 1880
  8253. 01:19:30,698 --> 01:19:33,535
  8254. I want him in my life.
  8255.  
  8256. 1881
  8257. 01:19:34,869 --> 01:19:36,434
  8258. Just do it.
  8259.  
  8260. 1882
  8261. 01:19:36,436 --> 01:19:38,836
  8262. Do it, Fabular, come on.
  8263.  
  8264. 1883
  8265. 01:19:38,838 --> 01:19:41,740
  8266. I got $500 here
  8267. for the first psychic
  8268.  
  8269. 1884
  8270. 01:19:41,742 --> 01:19:43,908
  8271. that can find my son.
  8272.  
  8273. 1885
  8274. 01:19:43,910 --> 01:19:45,844
  8275. He's on a train to Istanbul!
  8276.  
  8277. 1886
  8278. 01:19:45,846 --> 01:19:48,846
  8279. He's at Delray
  8280. Beach, tower 22!
  8281.  
  8282. 1887
  8283. 01:19:48,848 --> 01:19:51,617
  8284. He's fishing in Lake
  8285. Charles, Louisiana!
  8286.  
  8287. 1888
  8288. 01:19:51,619 --> 01:19:54,819
  8289. He is in San Francisco at
  8290. the opening of the opera.
  8291.  
  8292. 1889
  8293. 01:19:54,821 --> 01:19:55,655
  8294. Wait!
  8295.  
  8296. 1890
  8297. 01:19:56,824 --> 01:20:02,196
  8298. He's in Pismo Beach
  8299. at Melvin's house!
  8300.  
  8301. 1891
  8302. 01:20:06,566 --> 01:20:08,267
  8303. Do you actually need to be
  8304. a psychic to take a guess?
  8305.  
  8306. 1892
  8307. 01:20:14,941 --> 01:20:16,144
  8308. He's here.
  8309.  
  8310. 1893
  8311. 01:20:20,847 --> 01:20:22,649
  8312. Hi, Nick.
  8313.  
  8314. 1894
  8315. 01:20:28,489 --> 01:20:29,324
  8316. Hi, son.
  8317.  
  8318. 1895
  8319. 01:20:35,262 --> 01:20:36,698
  8320. Aw.
  8321.  
  8322. 1896
  8323. 01:20:43,204 --> 01:20:46,938
  8324. Hey, Mason, why
  8325. would you run away?
  8326.  
  8327. 1897
  8328. 01:20:46,940 --> 01:20:50,576
  8329. I came to ask Fabular
  8330. if I could live with him.
  8331.  
  8332. 1898
  8333. 01:20:50,578 --> 01:20:51,876
  8334. I don't wanna live
  8335. with my mother.
  8336.  
  8337. 1899
  8338. 01:20:51,878 --> 01:20:53,778
  8339. She isn't very nice.
  8340.  
  8341. 1900
  8342. 01:20:53,780 --> 01:20:57,381
  8343. No, I think she's
  8344. just not happy right now
  8345.  
  8346. 1901
  8347. 01:20:57,383 --> 01:20:58,349
  8348. but I think there's
  8349. something we can do
  8350.  
  8351. 1902
  8352. 01:20:58,351 --> 01:20:59,854
  8353. to maybe change that.
  8354.  
  8355. 1903
  8356. 01:21:01,254 --> 01:21:03,487
  8357. Hi, I'm Sydney.
  8358.  
  8359. 1904
  8360. 01:21:03,489 --> 01:21:05,691
  8361. It's nice to
  8362. officially meet you.
  8363.  
  8364. 1905
  8365. 01:21:05,693 --> 01:21:07,459
  8366. It's nice to meet you, Sydney.
  8367.  
  8368. 1906
  8369. 01:21:07,461 --> 01:21:09,928
  8370. Nick talks about
  8371. you all the time.
  8372.  
  8373. 1907
  8374. 01:21:09,930 --> 01:21:12,997
  8375. He is definitely yours.
  8376.  
  8377. 1908
  8378. 01:21:12,999 --> 01:21:15,000
  8379. Hey, Fabular!
  8380.  
  8381. 1909
  8382. 01:21:15,002 --> 01:21:17,868
  8383. You said on the radio that
  8384. Petey was on his way home to me!
  8385.  
  8386. 1910
  8387. 01:21:17,870 --> 01:21:19,470
  8388. But he was already dead!
  8389.  
  8390. 1911
  8391. 01:21:19,472 --> 01:21:20,973
  8392. You lied, you bastard!
  8393.  
  8394. 1912
  8395. 01:21:20,975 --> 01:21:23,242
  8396. This is for Petey!
  8397.  
  8398. 1913
  8399. 01:21:29,917 --> 01:21:30,952
  8400. Whoa!
  8401.  
  8402. 1914
  8403. 01:21:31,985 --> 01:21:32,819
  8404. Damn it!
  8405.  
  8406. 1915
  8407. 01:21:34,954 --> 01:21:36,925
  8408. Whoa, are you okay?
  8409.  
  8410. 1916
  8411. 01:21:40,526 --> 01:21:41,529
  8412. Scarecrow!
  8413.  
  8414. 1917
  8415. 01:21:42,829 --> 01:21:43,664
  8416. Tin Man!
  8417.  
  8418. 1918
  8419. 01:21:45,365 --> 01:21:45,966
  8420. My lion!
  8421.  
  8422. 1919
  8423. 01:21:49,503 --> 01:21:51,469
  8424. Thank you, Ernie.
  8425.  
  8426. 1920
  8427. 01:21:51,471 --> 01:21:52,706
  8428. I'll take my.
  8429.  
  8430. 1921
  8431. 01:22:04,284 --> 01:22:06,617
  8432. Is there anyone here
  8433. today who knows of a reason
  8434.  
  8435. 1922
  8436. 01:22:06,619 --> 01:22:11,225
  8437. why these two should not be
  8438. joined in holy matrimony?
  8439.  
  8440. 1923
  8441. 01:22:14,962 --> 01:22:16,928
  8442. Good, ladies and gentlemen,
  8443.  
  8444. 1924
  8445. 01:22:16,930 --> 01:22:18,697
  8446. it gives me great pleasure
  8447. to introduce to you
  8448.  
  8449. 1925
  8450. 01:22:18,699 --> 01:22:21,700
  8451. Mr. and Mrs. Nicholas Pearson.
  8452.  
  8453. 1926
  8454. 01:22:22,970 --> 01:22:24,935
  8455. Kiss the bride.
  8456.  
  8457. 1927
  8458. 01:22:33,747 --> 01:22:37,049
  8459. DC THE BRAIN
  8460. SUPREME: Party people!
  8461.  
  8462. 1928
  8463. 01:22:37,051 --> 01:22:40,254
  8464. Yeah, Tag Team music
  8465. in full effect!
  8466.  
  8467. 1929
  8468. 01:22:41,587 --> 01:22:46,425
  8469. That's me, DC the Brain Supreme
  8470. and my man Steve Roll'n!
  8471.  
  8472. 1930
  8473. 01:23:11,851 --> 01:23:13,053
  8474. Hey, hey, hey!
  8475.  
  8476. 1931
  8477. 01:23:13,986 --> 01:23:15,086
  8478. Hey!
  8479.  
  8480. 1932
  8481. 01:23:15,088 --> 01:23:17,022
  8482. Excuse me.
  8483.  
  8484. 1933
  8485. 01:23:17,024 --> 01:23:19,090
  8486. Is this one of yours?
  8487.  
  8488. 1934
  8489. 01:23:19,092 --> 01:23:20,694
  8490. Yep, afraid so.
  8491.  
  8492. 1935
  8493. 01:23:22,462 --> 01:23:23,463
  8494. Here you go.
  8495.  
  8496. 1936
  8497. 01:23:24,698 --> 01:23:28,133
  8498. Wow, your husband's a lucky man.
  8499.  
  8500. 1937
  8501. 01:23:28,135 --> 01:23:30,035
  8502. I want that one.
  8503.  
  8504. 1938
  8505. 01:23:30,037 --> 01:23:31,702
  8506. I love kids.
  8507.  
  8508. 1939
  8509. 01:23:31,704 --> 01:23:34,975
  8510. Oh, there is no husband.
  8511.  
  8512. 1940
  8513. 01:23:36,043 --> 01:23:37,312
  8514. It's just me.
  8515.  
  8516. 1941
  8517. 01:23:39,145 --> 01:23:40,814
  8518. My name is Walter.
  8519.  
  8520. 1942
  8521. 01:23:41,882 --> 01:23:43,014
  8522. Joanna.
  8523.  
  8524. 1943
  8525. 01:23:43,016 --> 01:23:44,148
  8526. Joanna?
  8527.  
  8528. 1944
  8529. 01:23:44,150 --> 01:23:45,550
  8530. Yeah.
  8531.  
  8532. 1945
  8533. 01:23:45,552 --> 01:23:47,018
  8534. That's a beautiful name.
  8535.  
  8536. 1946
  8537. 01:25:47,807 --> 01:25:50,175
  8538. Yeah, Tag Team music
  8539.  
  8540. 1947
  8541. 01:25:50,177 --> 01:25:52,877
  8542. comin' straight at 'cha!
  8543.  
  8544. 1948
  8545. 01:25:52,879 --> 01:25:57,885
  8546. That's me, DC the Brain Supreme,
  8547. and my man Steve Roll'n!
  8548.  
  8549. 1949
  8550. 01:25:59,019 --> 01:26:00,218
  8551. Bring it back y'all,
  8552.  
  8553. 1950
  8554. 01:26:00,220 --> 01:26:01,853
  8555. bring it back y'all
  8556. and here we go!
  8557.  
  8558. 1951
  8559. 01:26:21,173 --> 01:26:22,206
  8560. Whoomp, there it is
  8561.  
  8562. 1952
  8563. 01:29:06,209 --> 01:29:11,209
  8564. Subtitles by explosiveskull
RAW Paste Data
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