Say My Name (2019)

1
00:00:45,646 --> 00:00:47,746
<i>Oh, my God.
Say something.</i>

2
00:00:47,748 --> 00:00:49,081
<i>What-- what should I say?</i>

3
00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:50,349
<i>Anything. I just--</i>

4
00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:52,184
<i>I just need to
hear your accent.</i>

5
00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:54,053
<i>Well, technically,
if you're the tourist,</i>

6
00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:55,120
<i>- then you're the one with--</i>
<i>- Oh, my God.</i>

7
00:00:55,122 --> 00:00:57,589
<i>Shut up. Don't move.</i>

8
00:00:57,591 --> 00:01:00,826
Uh-huh. Don't move.

9
00:01:04,765 --> 00:01:07,599
No. Grab me!

10
00:01:07,601 --> 00:01:09,835
All right, okay.

11
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:11,837
Just like that.

12
00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:17,476
Now turn me over.

13
00:01:17,478 --> 00:01:20,112
- Oh, Statton.
- Oh, baby.

14
00:01:20,114 --> 00:01:23,682
- Mmm. Statton.
- Oh, baby, baby, baby.

15
00:01:23,684 --> 00:01:25,818
Say my name.

16
00:01:25,820 --> 00:01:29,521
Say my name!

17
00:01:29,523 --> 00:01:31,490
- Anne?
- What?

18
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,361
- Anne?
- You don't know my name.

19
00:01:36,363 --> 00:01:38,530
I'm-- I'm sorry.
I'm bad with names.

20
00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:39,731
Well, don't you think
you should at least

21
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:41,300
try to remember
the name of the person--

22
00:01:41,302 --> 00:01:43,302
I did. I did try.
I did a mnemonic.

23
00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:46,839
- What?
- I read a book which taught you how to remember names,

24
00:01:46,841 --> 00:01:49,541
and one way is to think
of someone with the same name,

25
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:51,543
- and my sister's name is Anne-Marie, so--
- You were thinking

26
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:53,245
of your sister
when we were screwing?

27
00:01:53,247 --> 00:01:56,515
No, no, no.
When we first met.

28
00:01:56,517 --> 00:02:00,152
My sister's name is Anne-Marie,
so I used her as a mnemonic.

29
00:02:00,154 --> 00:02:04,389
So I knew it was either Anne or
Marie, I just couldn't remember which.

30
00:02:04,391 --> 00:02:08,560
And I was too embarrassed to ask again,
'cause we were already, you know,

31
00:02:08,562 --> 00:02:13,465
kissing by then, so--
well, I'm guessing it's Marie.

32
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:17,302
- It's Mary.
- Oh.

33
00:02:18,572 --> 00:02:21,406
Sorry.
I must have misheard.

34
00:02:21,408 --> 00:02:23,342
That bar was so noisy.

35
00:02:23,344 --> 00:02:25,277
You heard me offer
to go to bed with you.

36
00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:26,812
Well, if I'd heard you say
your name was Mary,

37
00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:28,514
it would have been no problem.
My dog's called Mary.

38
00:02:28,516 --> 00:02:30,149
- I could have pictured her.
- Oh, my fuck.

39
00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:31,650
- Oh, no, no.
- God!

40
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,752
I'm not saying that you remind
me of a dog or anything.

41
00:02:33,754 --> 00:02:36,355
- I was just--
- You were just saying that to remember my name,

42
00:02:36,357 --> 00:02:38,757
you had to bring
your sister, your dog,

43
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:41,293
and your grandmother
into bed with us.

44
00:02:41,295 --> 00:02:44,329
Well, I remember your name.

45
00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:47,866
It's Statton. Statton Taylor.

46
00:02:47,868 --> 00:02:52,704
That's 'cause it's unusual. The-- the book
says it's easy to remember unusual names.

47
00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:55,307
Plus, people tend to picture
the Staten Island ferry.

48
00:02:55,309 --> 00:02:57,309
So what? I should change
my name to Eiffel Tower

49
00:02:57,311 --> 00:02:59,311
- to make things easier for you?
- No, no. I'm just saying

50
00:02:59,313 --> 00:03:01,547
you probably visualized
the Staten Island ferry

51
00:03:01,549 --> 00:03:03,849
- without realizing it.
- No, I didn't.

52
00:03:03,851 --> 00:03:07,319
I was just interested enough
in who I was sleeping with

53
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:09,454
to remember his name.

54
00:03:09,456 --> 00:03:12,257
So, did you know you were
going to sleep with me

55
00:03:12,259 --> 00:03:13,759
when I first
introduced myself?

56
00:03:13,761 --> 00:03:15,727
You always know.

57
00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:16,895
I've never been surprised

58
00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:19,298
to find myself
in bed with anyone.

59
00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:23,635
- Have you?
- Frequently.

60
00:03:23,637 --> 00:03:26,371
I'm always surprised that
anyone wants to sleep with me.

61
00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:29,341
Frequently?
How often do you do this?

62
00:03:29,343 --> 00:03:31,210
Oh, hardly ever.

63
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:36,848
That's a lie.

64
00:03:38,485 --> 00:03:39,785
Never ever.

65
00:03:42,790 --> 00:03:44,990
I never have one-night stands.

66
00:03:44,992 --> 00:03:49,561
Well, you're definitely
not completing this one.

67
00:03:51,632 --> 00:03:52,965
Stay right where you are.

68
00:03:58,005 --> 00:04:00,939
Do you like cop shows?
Huh? Go to the movies?

69
00:04:00,941 --> 00:04:03,842
Then you're both over-qualified
to survive this episode.

70
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:05,310
We're here for your stuff.

71
00:04:05,312 --> 00:04:08,013
Yeah, we like shiny stuff.

72
00:04:08,015 --> 00:04:10,015
Jewelry, laptops, phones.

73
00:04:10,017 --> 00:04:13,252
Watches, credit cards,
small change.

74
00:04:13,254 --> 00:04:14,686
My friend here
will take your things.

75
00:04:14,688 --> 00:04:16,755
I will remove your jewelry.

76
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:18,824
Now from the conversation
we've just overheard,

77
00:04:18,826 --> 00:04:23,695
Statton, you-- you'd like to
impress this lady, eh? Am I right?

78
00:04:23,697 --> 00:04:25,597
And even I know
her name is Mary.

79
00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:27,332
- Not that.
- Ooh!

80
00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:30,702
Bravery will be rewarded
with a hole in the head.

81
00:04:30,704 --> 00:04:34,473
And cooperation...

82
00:04:34,475 --> 00:04:37,476
will be rewarded with a smile.

83
00:04:37,478 --> 00:04:41,747
Just think of your online
status, Statton Taylor.

84
00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:45,584
"Survived being robbed at gunpoint."

85
00:04:45,586 --> 00:04:49,888
"Thumbs up, Mary." Like, like,
like, like, like, like, like.

86
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:58,030
Would you get off
the bed, please?

87
00:05:04,938 --> 00:05:06,672
Come on, on with it!

88
00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:15,580
- Oh,<i> schiesse.</i>
- You fucking shot me.

89
00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:17,983
- Why'd you fucking shoot me?
- Well, you started it.

90
00:05:17,985 --> 00:05:19,751
There was somebody
in the wardrobe.

91
00:05:19,753 --> 00:05:22,020
It's a fucking mirror,
you Magoo.

92
00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:24,556
- You saw his reflection.
- Yeah, well, who the fuck were you shooting at?

93
00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:27,526
I thought there was someone
shooting behind me, which there was!

94
00:05:27,528 --> 00:05:30,362
Only I didn't know
it was my fucking sidekick.

95
00:05:30,364 --> 00:05:32,931
If anyone's a fucking
sidekick, okay, it is you.

96
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:36,568
- You're a fucking sidekick.
- Well, I'm not the one with a fucking bullet in my leg.

97
00:05:36,570 --> 00:05:38,503
Fuck you.
Whose room is this?

98
00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:40,372
- Which one of you booked?
- It's mine. It's mine.

99
00:05:40,374 --> 00:05:42,474
Yeah? You get up, okay?

100
00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:44,476
Call the front desk
and say you've just been--

101
00:05:44,478 --> 00:05:46,611
you've just been disturbed by the
bangs that you heard down the corridor.

102
00:05:46,613 --> 00:05:49,715
- What the fuck?
- You always have to alert the authorities, okay?

103
00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:52,451
Alert the authorities
and they'll never suspect you.

104
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:55,954
- Do it.
- All right. Okay, okay, okay,

105
00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:59,825
Okay.

106
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:02,127
Hello.

107
00:06:02,129 --> 00:06:05,097
My name's Statton Taylor.
I'm in room, uh...

108
00:06:05,099 --> 00:06:07,499
- Keep it natural. Keep it natural.
- ...uh, 304.

109
00:06:07,501 --> 00:06:10,469
- Um, I just heard two loud shots.
- Bangs!

110
00:06:10,471 --> 00:06:12,137
- Bangs!
- Bangs. Bangs! Uh, uh--

111
00:06:12,139 --> 00:06:13,805
They might have not been shots.
It could have been anything.

112
00:06:13,807 --> 00:06:15,774
Tell them that you need
your sleep, okay?

113
00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:17,642
You don't want to be disturbed and
you've got a thing in the morning.

114
00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:21,546
I don't want to be disturbed.
I got a thing in the morning.

115
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:22,814
- Early!
- An early work--

116
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:25,650
I have early work
in the morning.

117
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:28,453
Okay. Yes, please
don't disturb me.

118
00:06:28,455 --> 00:06:30,822
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Okay, thank you very much.

119
00:06:30,824 --> 00:06:34,092
Thank you. Okay, bye.

120
00:06:34,094 --> 00:06:36,528
- What did he say?
- He said they heard it.

121
00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:39,998
- And?
- They're looking into it.

122
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,734
- Right, we need to go.
- No, no, no, no, no.

123
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,170
I can't go through reception
dripping with blood.

124
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:46,805
They're looking
for a guy with a gun,

125
00:06:46,807 --> 00:06:49,074
and I got a fucking hole
in my leg.

126
00:06:49,076 --> 00:06:51,810
Right. What do you
want me to do?

127
00:06:51,812 --> 00:06:54,780
I just want you to watch me
bleed to death, okay?

128
00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:57,582
Just go.
Just get somebody, okay?

129
00:06:57,584 --> 00:06:59,618
Well, I cannot call
a fucking ambulance, can I?

130
00:06:59,620 --> 00:07:04,189
No, no, Will-- Will's brother,
okay, is a doctor, all right?

131
00:07:04,191 --> 00:07:08,160
- He's fucking 12!
- His older brother.

132
00:07:08,162 --> 00:07:11,129
Right, okay.
Keep your fucking leg on.

133
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:13,165
Take that, right?
In case I get searched on my way out.

134
00:07:13,167 --> 00:07:16,668
Keep one trained on each
of their fucking heads.

135
00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:18,103
Um, um, um, look--

136
00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:19,871
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Don't.

137
00:07:23,043 --> 00:07:26,845
Look, um,
I know you don't care,

138
00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:29,214
but that pendant...

139
00:07:29,216 --> 00:07:32,784
I really need it.
It was my mother's.

140
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:36,922
It's-- it's of great
sentimental value to me.

141
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:40,892
Oh, well, um, okay.

142
00:07:40,894 --> 00:07:43,228
Money is of great
sentimental value to me,

143
00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:45,964
and I know a man
who will give me cash.

144
00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:49,634
God fucking damn it.

145
00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:59,644
Can I get dressed, please?

146
00:08:01,748 --> 00:08:03,081
Slowly.

147
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:15,126
- Can I get dressed?
- Do you have to?

148
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:38,817
Mary, can you bring
that sheet over, please?

149
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:48,827
Can you tie it
around my leg?

150
00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:59,971
Thank you, Mary. Thank you, Mary.

151
00:08:59,973 --> 00:09:01,773
Thank you very much.

152
00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:12,017
- Whose credit cards are these?
- They're mine.

153
00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:14,986
Says "Carol. Carol Page."

154
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:19,157
I think if there's one thing
we've all learned tonight,

155
00:09:19,159 --> 00:09:21,593
is that your name
is definitely Mary.

156
00:09:21,595 --> 00:09:24,796
Are these stolen credit cards?
'Cause I do not want stolen credit cards.

157
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:29,768
They're not stolen.
Carol's my real name.

158
00:09:31,338 --> 00:09:34,272
You gave me a fake name?

159
00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:35,874
Whatevs.
It was a one-night stand.

160
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,709
I gave you a fake
phone number as well.

161
00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:39,744
Then why were you so upset
that I didn't call you Marie?

162
00:09:39,746 --> 00:09:41,713
- Mary!
- Mary, for fuck's sake.

163
00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:43,615
It doesn't matter!
It's not even her real name!

164
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:45,350
It was the name
that I told you,

165
00:09:45,352 --> 00:09:48,153
so, you know, it's still rude
of you to not remember it.

166
00:09:48,155 --> 00:09:50,255
Well, why did you want to hear me
say it if it's not even your name?

167
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:52,324
'Cause I knew
you'd forgotten it.

168
00:09:52,326 --> 00:09:56,094
I could tell by the way you kept
saying, "Oh, baby, baby, baby."

169
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:58,363
So you were testing me during sex?

170
00:09:58,365 --> 00:10:00,699
That's entrapment.
That is nice.

171
00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:05,870
Remembering the fake name I gave
you is the minimum requirement.

172
00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:09,007
And, anyway,
it's sort of my name.

173
00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:12,110
Sort of? How can it be
sort of your name?

174
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:16,881
It was my name
when I was a nun.

175
00:10:16,883 --> 00:10:18,883
You were a nun?

176
00:10:18,885 --> 00:10:21,386
I was a novice for, like,
two years when I was young.

177
00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:24,623
I was Sister Mary Catherine.

178
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:27,892
You wanted him to call you by
your nun name while you did it?

179
00:10:27,894 --> 00:10:30,395
- Well, that's hot.
- Not because of that, no.

180
00:10:30,397 --> 00:10:32,163
Do you mind?
This is private.

181
00:10:32,165 --> 00:10:35,400
Yeah. I'm feeling a bit
like a fifth wheel.

182
00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:36,801
You want me to go?

183
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:42,240
- Have you still got the habit?
- Oh, come on.

184
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:45,410
Oh, my God.

185
00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:47,412
Do you still have
the habit?

186
00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:49,114
Not on me, no.

187
00:10:49,116 --> 00:10:52,917
Of course.
Sorry, sorry.

188
00:10:52,919 --> 00:10:56,287
So, uh, you're a Catholic
boy, too, then, eh?

189
00:10:56,289 --> 00:10:58,089
Yeah.

190
00:10:58,091 --> 00:11:01,126
Do you go to St. Godfrey's?
I feel like I recognize you.

191
00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:03,995
I just got one
of those faces.

192
00:11:03,997 --> 00:11:05,397
What are the chances, eh?

193
00:11:05,399 --> 00:11:07,966
Three strangers,
all of us Catholic.

194
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:12,103
- I'm not.
- You were a nun.

195
00:11:12,105 --> 00:11:14,806
How can you be a nun
and not be Catholic?

196
00:11:14,808 --> 00:11:17,942
It's one of those questions
they never ask.

197
00:11:17,944 --> 00:11:20,812
They just assume
if you sign up to be a nun,

198
00:11:20,814 --> 00:11:22,681
you know, must be Catholic.

199
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:26,017
Always go to the authorities
and they never suspect a thing.

200
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,819
- Does that always work?
- No.

201
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:32,323
Yes. I learned it when I went
to London when I was 19.

202
00:11:32,325 --> 00:11:35,326
- What, like in crime training?
- No, going to the opera.

203
00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:38,063
- The opera?
- Well, don't stereotype me, mate.

204
00:11:38,065 --> 00:11:39,998
- I wasn't.
- Not everyone with a gun

205
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:43,168
- is uncultured.
- Carry on the story. I want to hear.

206
00:11:43,170 --> 00:11:48,306
When I first went to London,
okay, I was, uh,

207
00:11:48,308 --> 00:11:51,476
training to be
an opera singer.

208
00:11:51,478 --> 00:11:55,313
And, uh, we used to go
to the interval,

209
00:11:55,315 --> 00:11:57,315
and, uh, no one
would check the tickets,

210
00:11:57,317 --> 00:11:59,050
so we'd just jump in
a spare seat.

211
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:02,754
This one time,
I went with my mate Callum,

212
00:12:02,756 --> 00:12:04,856
and they were sold out and
I was about to do a runner,

213
00:12:04,858 --> 00:12:08,793
and he went up to this usher,
who was a beautiful girl.

214
00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:11,162
And he said to her,
"Have I got time to go

215
00:12:11,164 --> 00:12:12,864
to the toilet
before it starts?"

216
00:12:12,866 --> 00:12:16,501
She says, "You can go
to the toilet, but...

217
00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:18,503
I'll have to put you
in a private box."

218
00:12:18,505 --> 00:12:24,509
So, uh, we watched
the second half of "Tosca"

219
00:12:24,511 --> 00:12:27,245
in a private box like kings.

220
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:29,114
Amazing.

221
00:12:29,116 --> 00:12:31,750
And after the opera,
Callum shagged the usher.

222
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:36,121
It was a beautiful night.

223
00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:45,447
That was lovely.

224
00:12:45,448 --> 00:12:48,032
So, you're an opera singer?
What happened?

225
00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:50,368
Oh, it's a very competitive
field, you know?

226
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:53,371
You gotta be really good
to progress and...

227
00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:59,210
this is an opportunity
for some fast cash.

228
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:01,946
And then one thing
led to a...

229
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:03,948
hole in the leg.

230
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:07,352
What was your biggest part?

231
00:13:07,354 --> 00:13:10,822
Pirate King
of "Pirates of Penzance."

232
00:13:10,824 --> 00:13:12,891
Wow.

233
00:13:12,893 --> 00:13:16,060
Just a tour. Just a tour,
but mainly to tourists.

234
00:13:16,062 --> 00:13:18,029
- It's impressive.
- Mm-hmm.

235
00:13:20,066 --> 00:13:22,400
Could you sing
something for us?

236
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:25,303
- Yeah.
- It might take your mind off your leg.

237
00:13:26,573 --> 00:13:28,573
- No.
- Oh, go on.

238
00:13:28,575 --> 00:13:30,975
- Please.
- No, I couldn't.

239
00:13:32,813 --> 00:13:34,546
Oh, it's a non-smoking room.

240
00:13:34,548 --> 00:13:37,048
I need to do something
for my pain, mate.

241
00:13:37,050 --> 00:13:39,017
Can I have one then?

242
00:13:47,327 --> 00:13:49,828
It's a non-smoking room.

243
00:13:49,830 --> 00:13:51,429
We won't tell if you won't.

244
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:53,364
Yeah, Statton,
live a little.

245
00:14:06,146 --> 00:14:11,950
♪ I am the Pirate King ♪

246
00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:15,186
♪ And it is, it is
a glorious thing ♪

247
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:21,192
♪ To be the Pirate King ♪

248
00:14:24,464 --> 00:14:28,633
♪ Oh, better far
to live and die ♪

249
00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:32,270
♪ Under the brave
black flag I fly ♪

250
00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:35,073
♪ Than play
a sanctimonious part ♪

251
00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:38,977
♪ With a pirate head
and a pirate heart ♪

252
00:14:38,979 --> 00:14:43,381
♪ I'll be true
to the song I sing ♪

253
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:46,251
♪ And live and die ♪

254
00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:50,154
♪ A Pirate King ♪

255
00:14:58,498 --> 00:15:03,301
♪ For I am the Pirate King ♪

256
00:15:03,303 --> 00:15:05,670
♪ Hurrah, hurrah,
for the Pirate King ♪

257
00:15:05,672 --> 00:15:08,006
♪ It is, it is
a glorious thing ♪

258
00:15:08,008 --> 00:15:10,041
♪ To be a Pirate King ♪

259
00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:12,110
♪ It is, hurrah for
the Pirate King ♪

260
00:15:12,112 --> 00:15:18,182
- ♪ Hurrah ♪
- ♪ The Pirate King ♪

261
00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:24,489
Fuck.

262
00:15:30,530 --> 00:15:31,696
Oh, fuck.

263
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,197
Fuck, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck.

264
00:15:37,037 --> 00:15:38,536
Mr. Taylor?

265
00:15:38,538 --> 00:15:40,605
It's the hotel duty manager.

266
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:45,543
- Get rid of him.
- How?

267
00:15:45,545 --> 00:15:48,546
Answer the door and say you
were disturbed by a shot.

268
00:15:48,548 --> 00:15:52,383
- A shot or a bang?
- Bang, okay?

269
00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:56,120
Okay, no funny business,
'cause remember-- get on there.

270
00:15:56,122 --> 00:15:58,489
Remember, I've got a gun pointed
at your girlfriend's head, mate.

271
00:15:58,491 --> 00:16:00,158
Girlfriend?

272
00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:04,495
Mr. Taylor?

273
00:16:04,497 --> 00:16:05,563
Mr. Taylor?

274
00:16:08,568 --> 00:16:10,301
Fuck it!
I'll go, I'll go.

275
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,338
I'll go, I'll go, I'll go.

276
00:16:19,980 --> 00:16:21,612
What's going on, huh?

277
00:16:21,614 --> 00:16:24,382
I was just woken up by an alarm
and then a shot-- bang.

278
00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:28,486
Whatever.
And now you're thumping on my door.

279
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:31,122
Sorry, Mr. Taylor.

280
00:16:31,124 --> 00:16:35,126
We had a complaint about,
uh, some kind of singing

281
00:16:35,128 --> 00:16:38,596
- coming from your room.
- That was next door.

282
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:40,131
I was gonna complain
about that, too.

283
00:16:40,133 --> 00:16:42,433
Okay, I'm going for his gun.

284
00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:44,469
He's wounded.
We can overpower him.

285
00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:47,438
- No, no. He'll kill us.
- He might kill us anyway. Come on.

286
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,607
I got an ace up my sleeve.
I've remembered where I know him from.

287
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:51,442
- What? Where?
- His name's Kipper.

288
00:16:51,444 --> 00:16:53,778
- Oh, his name you remember?
- Well, I pictured a herring,

289
00:16:53,780 --> 00:16:56,614
- and the book says it's easier to remember unusual names.
- Oh, my fuck!

290
00:16:56,616 --> 00:16:59,517
- Look, when I tell him--
- Do not fucking tell him.

291
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:01,786
- What?
- If he knows you, he'll have to kill you.

292
00:17:01,788 --> 00:17:05,156
- Why?
- Statton, I don't want to die,

293
00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:08,292
and neither do you, so shut the fuck
up, and follow my lead.

294
00:17:08,294 --> 00:17:09,360
But he--

295
00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:27,612
I think you were right.
I do remember you.

296
00:17:27,614 --> 00:17:33,117
No, I just think you got one
of those faces, like you said.

297
00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,686
How can it be my face
if I remember you?

298
00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:41,659
You...

299
00:17:41,661 --> 00:17:43,494
were at Danno's party.

300
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:48,166
No, I-- I don't think I was.

301
00:17:48,168 --> 00:17:51,135
Yes! Danno's!

302
00:17:51,137 --> 00:17:52,804
You're the piano tuner guy.

303
00:17:52,806 --> 00:17:54,806
We were doing shots
in the kitchen.

304
00:17:54,808 --> 00:17:59,310
Oh, that Danno, yes.
Yes, I was. Yes.

305
00:17:59,312 --> 00:18:02,213
- Sorry.
- I totally remember you.

306
00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:04,449
So, you live around here?

307
00:18:04,451 --> 00:18:07,518
- Mm-hmm.
- Then why are we in a hotel?

308
00:18:09,756 --> 00:18:11,556
Come on, Statton.

309
00:18:11,558 --> 00:18:14,525
You don't want to die
with a lie on your conscience.

310
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:17,728
That is true. As a Catholic,
it's highly inadvisable.

311
00:18:20,533 --> 00:18:23,868
I, um, still live
with my wife.

312
00:18:23,870 --> 00:18:27,305
- Oh, Jesus.
- No, we're separated.

313
00:18:27,307 --> 00:18:29,373
I sleep on the sofa
in the living room.

314
00:18:29,375 --> 00:18:31,375
Just hasn't been
the right time to leave.

315
00:18:31,377 --> 00:18:34,312
Sure, you're separated,
but you still live together.

316
00:18:34,314 --> 00:18:37,548
- Totally believable.
- I promise you, she won't mind me being here.

317
00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:40,651
- I could introduce you, if you like.
- No, I'm fine, really.

318
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:47,725
So, uh,
how do you know Danno?

319
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:49,627
Well, my mate Theo
is his supplier.

320
00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:51,329
You're a drug dealer, too?

321
00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:54,398
No. Theo's a drug dealer.

322
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:56,634
I would never be
a drug dealer.

323
00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:59,403
It's too fussy.
Might as well be a shopkeeper.

324
00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:09,280
Oh.

325
00:19:09,282 --> 00:19:11,849
Yeah? What do you got?

326
00:19:11,851 --> 00:19:15,653
Will's brother
is cave-diving in Azerbaijan.

327
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:18,923
- I'm fucking dying here.
- <i>Yeah, I know.</i>

328
00:19:18,925 --> 00:19:21,225
- <i>I'm exploring other options.</i>
- Like what?

329
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:25,596
- Theo knows this vet.
- A vet? Victor the vet?

330
00:19:25,598 --> 00:19:27,798
Yeah, I think he said
his name was Victor, yeah.

331
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,268
Well, he's not even a real vet.
He got his diploma on the Internet.

332
00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:33,704
Well, Theo swears by him. Said he was
a star when his wee doggie got shot.

333
00:19:33,706 --> 00:19:36,274
I won't see a vet without
proper qualifications.

334
00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:39,610
Hey, that doggie has little
wheels on his back legs now.

335
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:43,714
Are you telling me that his last
patient is now a paraplegic?

336
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,952
Yeah, all right,
I'll sort something else out.

337
00:19:47,954 --> 00:19:51,222
And a packet of chewing gum, please.
Sugar-free.

338
00:19:52,792 --> 00:19:54,492
How's the situation now?

339
00:19:54,494 --> 00:19:57,628
Oh, ahem, yeah,
situation's under control, Dec.

340
00:19:57,630 --> 00:20:00,631
You'll never guess.

341
00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:03,935
Statton and I have met before
at one of Danno's parties.

342
00:20:05,505 --> 00:20:08,372
What the fuck?
Are you a chartered moron?

343
00:20:08,374 --> 00:20:11,442
If he knows you,
he can ID you.

344
00:20:11,444 --> 00:20:13,644
If they can hear you,
don't say a fucking word.

345
00:20:16,482 --> 00:20:19,584
This is why you
are the sidekick.

346
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:24,355
Fuck you. What do I do?

347
00:20:24,357 --> 00:20:27,692
Well, you're gonna
have to kill 'em.

348
00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:28,960
What?

349
00:20:28,962 --> 00:20:32,997
Well, I, uh--
I've, uh, never--

350
00:20:32,999 --> 00:20:36,801
never really had any experience
in that kind of area before.

351
00:20:36,803 --> 00:20:40,972
Are you trying to tell me that you
have never killed anyone before?

352
00:20:40,974 --> 00:20:42,506
That's correct.

353
00:20:42,508 --> 00:20:46,310
Jesus. You must have.

354
00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:48,346
- Well, I haven't.
- <i>Are you sure?</i>

355
00:20:48,348 --> 00:20:50,448
Well, I'm pretty sure I'd
remember that sort of thing.

356
00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:52,984
Jesus, Kipper.

357
00:20:52,986 --> 00:20:56,854
And, um, you know, there's been
a little bit of bonding,

358
00:20:56,856 --> 00:20:59,290
and, uh, reminiscences
and all that.

359
00:20:59,292 --> 00:21:01,726
I have three previous.

360
00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:03,527
I'm on parole.

361
00:21:03,529 --> 00:21:07,031
I will get 20 years
for armed robbery.

362
00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:09,634
I am not gonna do
20 fucking years

363
00:21:09,636 --> 00:21:11,636
'cause you're a French fancy!

364
00:21:14,540 --> 00:21:15,973
All right.

365
00:21:17,577 --> 00:21:18,976
You'll have to kill her, too.

366
00:21:18,978 --> 00:21:22,713
No. No.

367
00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:28,886
- <i>No, no.</i>
- She will see you kill him.

368
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:31,756
We can't have her being
a witness to that, can we?

369
00:21:35,895 --> 00:21:36,961
I can't do it.

370
00:21:39,365 --> 00:21:41,332
All right, I'll do it,

371
00:21:41,334 --> 00:21:44,068
if you admit
you're the sidekick.

372
00:21:44,070 --> 00:21:47,905
You're wrong. It got a lot friendly,
and you don't shoot a friend.

373
00:21:47,907 --> 00:21:50,808
I'm a lot less shootable
now that he knows me socially.

374
00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:53,077
No, no, no.
You're wrong.

375
00:21:53,079 --> 00:21:56,414
He can't let you go,
so now he can't let me go.

376
00:21:59,485 --> 00:22:00,918
As soon as this is through

377
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:03,754
I'm taking Tina
and the kids...

378
00:22:13,766 --> 00:22:16,534
Drop the gun and the phone.

379
00:22:18,738 --> 00:22:22,506
- How did you get that?
- You left it on the chair, Pirate King.

380
00:22:24,977 --> 00:22:26,977
I am the sidekick.

381
00:22:38,958 --> 00:22:41,592
Hello, my name's Statton Taylor.
I'm in room 304.

382
00:22:41,594 --> 00:22:43,961
We need police
and ambulance right away.

383
00:22:43,963 --> 00:22:45,863
Oh, thank you very much.
Okay, bye.

384
00:22:48,134 --> 00:22:50,968
Police are on their way up 'cause
of the earlier bangs-- shot, shots.

385
00:22:50,970 --> 00:22:52,403
- Statton?
- Hmm?

386
00:22:52,405 --> 00:22:55,039
- Get the gun.
- Oh, right.

387
00:23:00,646 --> 00:23:04,815
Please, give me a chance.
Give me a head start, okay?

388
00:23:04,817 --> 00:23:07,618
I've got kids,
I'm an opera singer, and...

389
00:23:07,620 --> 00:23:09,987
I'm clearly not good
at this.

390
00:23:11,991 --> 00:23:14,992
I'll quit.

391
00:23:14,994 --> 00:23:16,927
I'll go into teaching.

392
00:23:26,472 --> 00:23:30,608
- Police! Get on the floor!
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Get on the floor!

393
00:23:30,610 --> 00:23:33,511
Thank Christ you're here!

394
00:23:33,513 --> 00:23:35,813
- What?
- They tried to kill me! I brought her up to my room,

395
00:23:35,815 --> 00:23:37,548
and she pulled out a gun
and called her boyfriend.

396
00:23:37,550 --> 00:23:40,918
- He was robbing us.
- You get your heads down!

397
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:43,154
The room's in my name.
My name's Statton Taylor.

398
00:23:43,156 --> 00:23:45,022
Of course it is.
And I'm the one being held at gunpoint.

399
00:23:45,024 --> 00:23:47,525
- I'm Statton Taylor!
- No, he's not!

400
00:23:47,527 --> 00:23:48,793
- Shut the fuck up!
- Okay, okay, okay.

401
00:23:48,795 --> 00:23:50,494
Have you got any ID, sir?

402
00:23:50,496 --> 00:23:53,063
- Hey, that's my wallet!
- Shut it!

403
00:24:00,706 --> 00:24:04,208
- Any photo ID?
- Ah, Jesus. They're the ones with the guns.

404
00:24:04,210 --> 00:24:07,812
- Whose ID do you think it is?
- It's mine! He stole the wallet from me!

405
00:24:07,814 --> 00:24:10,781
Very slowly look up
towards the door.

406
00:24:10,783 --> 00:24:12,817
Sedgwick, manager.

407
00:24:12,819 --> 00:24:15,486
Which one of these men
is Statton Taylor?

408
00:24:17,523 --> 00:24:19,690
- That one.
- What?

409
00:24:19,692 --> 00:24:21,892
- I talked to him earlier.
- His name is Kipper.

410
00:24:21,894 --> 00:24:24,161
He went to the door.
He had us at gunpoint.

411
00:24:24,163 --> 00:24:26,964
You're the one with the guns.
He's the one that's wounded.

412
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:31,135
- Twice. Wounded twice.
- We'll get you to the hospital, Mr. Taylor.

413
00:24:31,137 --> 00:24:33,737
- We'll take a statement in the morning.
- Thank you, officer.

414
00:24:33,739 --> 00:24:34,772
I thought they
were gonna kill me.

415
00:24:34,774 --> 00:24:37,641
We do our job, that's all.

416
00:24:37,643 --> 00:24:39,944
You do not
have to say anything,

417
00:24:39,946 --> 00:24:43,013
but it may harm your defense if
you don't mention when questioned

418
00:24:43,015 --> 00:24:46,083
something you later
rely on in court.

419
00:25:08,841 --> 00:25:14,011
Fuck. Statton, I think I've got
a wrap of coke in my pocket.

420
00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:16,514
What? Cocaine?

421
00:25:16,516 --> 00:25:18,949
Mm-hmm. Can you reach it?
It's in my jacket pocket.

422
00:25:18,951 --> 00:25:22,953
- But they searched you.
- There's a zip pocket inside the pocket.

423
00:25:22,955 --> 00:25:28,092
- Just leave it there.
- No, no. They might have dogs at the station.

424
00:25:28,094 --> 00:25:31,161
Why do you have cocaine anyway? It's illegal.

425
00:25:31,163 --> 00:25:33,797
It's from a party
weeks ago.

426
00:25:33,799 --> 00:25:36,967
- Just get it.
- All right.

427
00:25:36,969 --> 00:25:38,269
God!

428
00:25:43,142 --> 00:25:44,875
I can't.

429
00:25:44,877 --> 00:25:47,878
- That is not my pocket.
- Sorry.

430
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,880
I've got it,
I've got it, I've got it.

431
00:25:52,051 --> 00:25:53,717
Let's hand it in.

432
00:25:53,719 --> 00:25:56,954
No, no. Just drop it
when we get out of the van.

433
00:25:56,956 --> 00:26:00,691
No, you always go to the authorities,
that way they never suspect you.

434
00:26:04,130 --> 00:26:06,263
Officer?

435
00:26:06,265 --> 00:26:09,266
- Officer, I found illegal drugs in the back of your van.
- Statton, no, no, no.

436
00:26:43,603 --> 00:26:46,370
Not your first time then.

437
00:26:46,372 --> 00:26:49,106
- What?
- We've run a check on your girlfriend's fingerprints.

438
00:26:49,108 --> 00:26:52,876
- She's not my girlfriend.
- Oh, I'm sorry. Your "lady friend."

439
00:26:52,878 --> 00:26:55,813
Her name is Yvonne Page,

440
00:26:55,815 --> 00:27:00,284
and she has a previous
for armed robbery.

441
00:27:00,286 --> 00:27:03,087
We're not saying anything
till our lawyer gets here.

442
00:27:03,089 --> 00:27:06,657
- Come back then.
- Oh, I will.

443
00:27:22,241 --> 00:27:24,675
Fucking sidekick.

444
00:27:25,411 --> 00:27:26,910
Fuck.

445
00:27:35,421 --> 00:27:38,155
Where's the leg
that needs fixing then?

446
00:27:40,226 --> 00:27:42,793
Your name's Yvonne?
Your name's not even Carol.

447
00:27:42,795 --> 00:27:44,795
You have previous convictions.

448
00:27:44,797 --> 00:27:46,430
Oh, that's it,
we're going down.

449
00:27:46,432 --> 00:27:48,766
Oh, calm down.
It's not like I planned this.

450
00:27:48,768 --> 00:27:50,934
If I did, I wouldn't have a
criminal record now, would I?

451
00:27:50,936 --> 00:27:54,104
Still your fault. You grabbed the gun.
You had the cocaine.

452
00:27:54,106 --> 00:27:56,140
Oh, my God,
I'm going down for armed robbery.

453
00:27:56,142 --> 00:27:59,677
Oh, my giddy Christ, why didn't you
tell me you'd already been arrested?

454
00:27:59,679 --> 00:28:02,246
- It was a long time ago. I--
- Well, how long ago?

455
00:28:02,248 --> 00:28:03,914
Was it before
or after the nunnery?

456
00:28:03,916 --> 00:28:07,317
It was actually the reason
I was asked to leave.

457
00:28:08,821 --> 00:28:11,822
You committed armed robbery
when you were a nun?

458
00:28:11,824 --> 00:28:13,824
I just drove the getaway car.

459
00:28:13,826 --> 00:28:15,959
No one thought they'd chase
the convent car.

460
00:28:15,961 --> 00:28:18,462
It had St. Lucy of the Isle
Convent written all over it.

461
00:28:18,464 --> 00:28:20,097
You were a nun here
on the island?

462
00:28:20,099 --> 00:28:21,832
- Mm-hmm.
- I thought you were a tourist.

463
00:28:21,834 --> 00:28:23,333
I left the island years ago.

464
00:28:23,335 --> 00:28:25,703
I just come back
every now and again.

465
00:28:25,705 --> 00:28:27,938
To wreak havoc
and get people arrested.

466
00:28:27,940 --> 00:28:30,374
Look, you're making
too much of it.

467
00:28:30,376 --> 00:28:33,310
I got a suspended sentence,
I didn't do time.

468
00:28:33,312 --> 00:28:34,978
Who are you even
doing this with?

469
00:28:34,980 --> 00:28:37,114
- Errant nuns who needed--
- No.

470
00:28:37,116 --> 00:28:39,116
I fell in with a bad crowd.

471
00:28:39,118 --> 00:28:41,085
How? You were living
in a convent!

472
00:28:41,087 --> 00:28:44,321
They were a youth group.
Troubled teens.

473
00:28:44,323 --> 00:28:46,724
I was supposed to be
mentoring them,

474
00:28:46,726 --> 00:28:49,159
- but instead--
- Instead, you committed armed robbery with them.

475
00:28:49,161 --> 00:28:52,229
Oh, they were fun, and they offered
to give me some of the cash.

476
00:28:52,231 --> 00:28:55,399
You have no idea how hard
the vow of poverty is.

477
00:28:55,401 --> 00:29:01,772
- Fuck-a-fuck.
- Way worse than chastity by far.

478
00:29:08,180 --> 00:29:10,214
Hello.
Statton Taylor speaking.

479
00:29:10,216 --> 00:29:14,284
- Kipper! What's going on?
- Oh, calm down, mum.

480
00:29:14,286 --> 00:29:17,154
I'm fine, I'm fine.
I'm in the hospital.

481
00:29:17,156 --> 00:29:20,290
- You're not in the nick?
- <i>No. No, no, no.</i>

482
00:29:20,292 --> 00:29:22,459
They caught the pair
that did it.

483
00:29:25,364 --> 00:29:28,899
Are you telling me
the two people that can ID us

484
00:29:28,901 --> 00:29:30,534
are in the fucking nick?

485
00:29:30,536 --> 00:29:32,302
That's right, mum.

486
00:29:42,381 --> 00:29:43,981
<i>You really stupid,
you know that?</i>

487
00:29:43,983 --> 00:29:47,050
I woke Petal up
and got her to put on

488
00:29:47,052 --> 00:29:49,219
a nurse's uniform
to instill confidence in you,

489
00:29:49,221 --> 00:29:51,555
and you're not
even fucking here!

490
00:29:51,557 --> 00:29:53,323
Look, someone with
a first aid certificate

491
00:29:53,325 --> 00:29:56,260
that you do weekly role-play
with is not a nurse.

492
00:29:58,063 --> 00:30:00,230
Mum.

493
00:30:00,232 --> 00:30:03,033
Just get yourself out of the
hospital as soon as you can,

494
00:30:03,035 --> 00:30:05,536
before
the Bobbsey twins ID you.

495
00:30:07,940 --> 00:30:09,306
Love you, bye.

496
00:30:10,242 --> 00:30:11,408
Prick.

497
00:30:15,281 --> 00:30:16,580
We have to go, Petal.

498
00:30:16,582 --> 00:30:20,083
Shame to waste the bed.

499
00:30:20,085 --> 00:30:25,022
You could be done
in three minutes, Dec-ster.

500
00:30:32,932 --> 00:30:36,300
This can't be happening.
This can't be happening to me.

501
00:30:36,302 --> 00:30:39,169
- This is your fault!
- This is good for you.

502
00:30:39,171 --> 00:30:41,872
You needed
something like this.

503
00:30:54,253 --> 00:30:57,621
I don't want no trouble.
I just wanna go home.

504
00:30:59,458 --> 00:31:04,628
Seems to me
like you need a new start.

505
00:31:04,630 --> 00:31:07,297
Get your own place.

506
00:31:07,299 --> 00:31:09,132
That problem
seems to be solved.

507
00:31:09,134 --> 00:31:11,134
I'm about to get
a cell of my own.

508
00:31:11,136 --> 00:31:13,136
It'd be better than
what you have.

509
00:31:13,138 --> 00:31:15,138
You got no life.

510
00:31:15,140 --> 00:31:17,574
Don't judge me.
You can't judge me.

511
00:31:17,576 --> 00:31:21,011
I run my own business.
I tune pianos, which is a--

512
00:31:21,013 --> 00:31:22,946
Which is,
when you think about it,

513
00:31:22,948 --> 00:31:25,315
making something someone else
made very slightly better.

514
00:31:25,317 --> 00:31:28,285
You don't make pianos.
You don't make music.

515
00:31:28,287 --> 00:31:32,356
What the-- I allow
other people to make music.

516
00:31:32,358 --> 00:31:36,026
Well, aren't you tired of letting
other people make the music?

517
00:31:36,028 --> 00:31:39,663
When I started, there were
a thousand functioning pianos

518
00:31:39,665 --> 00:31:42,232
on this island,
and now there are 400.

519
00:31:42,234 --> 00:31:46,937
I'm not even a failed musician anymore.
I'm a failed piano tuner.

520
00:31:48,340 --> 00:31:51,341
Except now
I'll be nothing,

521
00:31:51,343 --> 00:31:53,210
because I'll have
a criminal record.

522
00:31:53,212 --> 00:31:56,079
And what school or church
or community hall

523
00:31:56,081 --> 00:31:58,682
is gonna give me the run
of their place, eh?

524
00:31:58,684 --> 00:32:02,953
Because my life,
the one you say I don't have,

525
00:32:02,955 --> 00:32:04,421
will be over.

526
00:32:04,423 --> 00:32:07,190
You're acting like
we're guilty here.

527
00:32:07,192 --> 00:32:09,593
The whole thing is kinda
funny when you think about it.

528
00:32:09,595 --> 00:32:12,195
The cops arresting us
while the guy was in the room?

529
00:32:12,197 --> 00:32:14,097
That wasn't remotely funny.

530
00:32:14,099 --> 00:32:16,066
And who gives a flying frick
if we're innocent

531
00:32:16,068 --> 00:32:17,434
if we can't prove it?

532
00:32:17,436 --> 00:32:20,704
Look, when our lawyer
gets here, he--

533
00:32:20,706 --> 00:32:23,974
he should be here.
What time is it?

534
00:32:23,976 --> 00:32:26,543
Well, I don't know, because
the very expensive watch

535
00:32:26,545 --> 00:32:28,145
that my wife bought me
has been stolen.

536
00:32:28,147 --> 00:32:30,080
It wasn't expensive.
It was a fake.

537
00:32:30,082 --> 00:32:32,382
My wife bought me that watch
from a very, very--

538
00:32:32,384 --> 00:32:34,685
Then your wife was ripped off.

539
00:32:34,687 --> 00:32:36,987
My dad was a jeweler.

540
00:32:36,989 --> 00:32:38,722
I spent
my childhood in Philly

541
00:32:38,724 --> 00:32:41,491
sitting in the back of
his shop wearing a loupe.

542
00:32:41,493 --> 00:32:44,461
He called me Diamond Lil'.

543
00:32:44,463 --> 00:32:47,731
My watch might be fake,
but at least I'm not.

544
00:32:49,401 --> 00:32:50,701
What's that supposed to mean?

545
00:32:50,703 --> 00:32:55,238
Mary, Carol,
Yvonne-- whatever.

546
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,607
Is there anything else
you want to tell me?

547
00:32:57,609 --> 00:32:59,409
I don't want
any more surprises.

548
00:32:59,411 --> 00:33:02,245
Well, one thing,

549
00:33:02,247 --> 00:33:05,382
but it's tiny,
not even worth mentioning.

550
00:33:05,384 --> 00:33:08,418
- What?
- It's nothing.

551
00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:10,587
I demand you tell me.

552
00:33:10,589 --> 00:33:13,557
Don't laugh at me.
This is my life!

553
00:33:13,559 --> 00:33:17,127
- It was a bar fight.
- You were in a bar fight.

554
00:33:17,129 --> 00:33:18,762
I was protecting a friend.

555
00:33:18,764 --> 00:33:21,431
Some guy was getting sleazy
with her in the strip club.

556
00:33:21,433 --> 00:33:24,001
What were you doing
in a strip club?

557
00:33:24,003 --> 00:33:26,336
Stripping.

558
00:33:30,009 --> 00:33:31,742
Right.

559
00:33:31,744 --> 00:33:34,578
Okay.

560
00:33:34,580 --> 00:33:36,113
Right.

561
00:33:36,115 --> 00:33:39,783
Was this before
or after the nunnery?

562
00:33:39,785 --> 00:33:42,152
After.

563
00:33:42,154 --> 00:33:45,288
I couldn't pay the bills,
couldn't go home.

564
00:33:45,290 --> 00:33:47,290
Did they know
you were a nun?

565
00:33:47,292 --> 00:33:49,292
That was my act.

566
00:33:49,294 --> 00:33:52,029
- What was?
- Stripping nun.

567
00:33:52,031 --> 00:33:56,666
My character was called
Our Lady Of The Night.

568
00:34:07,813 --> 00:34:09,780
You don't have to stay here
all night, you know.

569
00:34:09,782 --> 00:34:14,184
- Not on my account.
- Don't worry, mate.

570
00:34:14,186 --> 00:34:17,287
Better in here than it is out
there, I can assure you.

571
00:34:17,289 --> 00:34:19,589
Don't want to stretch
your legs or anything?

572
00:34:19,591 --> 00:34:23,493
Oh, thanks.
I'm meant to be here,

573
00:34:23,495 --> 00:34:27,230
just until they've taken
your statement in the morning

574
00:34:27,232 --> 00:34:29,733
and checked your ID.
Just formalities.

575
00:34:31,837 --> 00:34:36,373
Well, I feel really reassured
that you're gonna be here,

576
00:34:36,375 --> 00:34:37,774
Officer...

577
00:34:37,776 --> 00:34:41,411
- Uh, Dean.
- Dean.

578
00:34:44,349 --> 00:34:46,583
After all I've been through.

579
00:34:54,660 --> 00:34:57,527
Well, I've, um--

580
00:34:57,529 --> 00:35:01,698
I've gone and got myself
an errant nine on the top line.

581
00:35:01,700 --> 00:35:03,767
Are you any good
at "Suduku"?

582
00:35:07,372 --> 00:35:09,172
Sudoku.

583
00:35:15,714 --> 00:35:17,714
Do you know, I'll have a go
at this for you, officer,

584
00:35:17,716 --> 00:35:23,386
if you could get me a little
chocolate biscuit or something?

585
00:35:23,388 --> 00:35:26,556
Hot drink? Anything?

586
00:35:26,558 --> 00:35:30,460
Call me Luke, now that
we're sharing a "Sudoku."

587
00:35:33,265 --> 00:35:35,465
Yeah, a crisp.

588
00:35:47,479 --> 00:35:49,579
You might not care,
but I have things I need to get back for.

589
00:35:49,581 --> 00:35:51,281
Oh, really? Do you, Statton?

590
00:35:51,283 --> 00:35:52,816
You sleep on
your wife's sofa bed.

591
00:35:52,818 --> 00:35:54,584
What were your
big plans tonight,

592
00:35:54,586 --> 00:35:56,353
to go home
and jerk off and cry?

593
00:35:56,355 --> 00:35:59,589
- Jerk off and cry?
- Jerk off and cry.

594
00:35:59,591 --> 00:36:02,259
- Fuck off and die.
- Oh, come on!

595
00:36:02,261 --> 00:36:04,761
Isn't a part of you enjoying that
something's happening to you?

596
00:36:04,763 --> 00:36:06,930
- No!
- Wouldn't you like to have one story

597
00:36:06,932 --> 00:36:09,232
that didn't end with,
"And there was a cat

598
00:36:09,234 --> 00:36:10,734
trapped in my piano
all along?"

599
00:36:10,736 --> 00:36:12,936
You loved that story!
You laughed at that story--

600
00:36:12,938 --> 00:36:15,205
that story got you
into my bed!

601
00:36:15,207 --> 00:36:18,742
That story made me realize
that you needed to get laid.

602
00:36:20,312 --> 00:36:22,612
And you know what else?

603
00:36:22,614 --> 00:36:24,781
At the hotel,

604
00:36:24,783 --> 00:36:29,619
I left the door
unlocked deliberately

605
00:36:29,621 --> 00:36:33,623
because
it's more exciting that way.

606
00:36:33,625 --> 00:36:37,394
You fucked up nun!
You fucked up fucking nun!

607
00:36:40,299 --> 00:36:43,466
Mm-hmm.
Yup, yup, yup.

608
00:36:43,468 --> 00:36:44,734
Well, this seems
to be the room,

609
00:36:44,736 --> 00:36:47,337
that makes you
the clients.

610
00:36:47,339 --> 00:36:48,939
Are you our lawyer?

611
00:36:48,941 --> 00:36:51,808
- Yeah. Yup.
- Can I get some ice please?

612
00:36:51,810 --> 00:36:56,346
I doubt it. No. The facilities
here are surprisingly two-star.

613
00:36:56,348 --> 00:36:58,481
- I'm really hurt.
- No shit.

614
00:36:58,483 --> 00:37:00,217
So, tell me
how innocent you are.

615
00:37:00,219 --> 00:37:02,385
How the cops
have got it all wrong.

616
00:37:02,387 --> 00:37:03,520
They have got it all wrong.

617
00:37:03,522 --> 00:37:05,655
Okay, Yvonne,
I'm listening.

618
00:37:05,657 --> 00:37:07,357
I prefer Carol.

619
00:37:07,359 --> 00:37:08,992
Or Mary or countless
other names.

620
00:37:08,994 --> 00:37:10,493
Always reassures the court
if you have a number

621
00:37:10,495 --> 00:37:11,628
of functional pseudonyms.

622
00:37:11,630 --> 00:37:13,263
Yvonne will do.

623
00:37:13,265 --> 00:37:15,665
Yeah. Yup, yup, yup.

624
00:37:15,667 --> 00:37:18,835
Well, I'm Rich.
Uh, name only.

625
00:37:18,837 --> 00:37:20,670
Obviously,
not literally rich

626
00:37:20,672 --> 00:37:22,539
or I'd be drunk
this time of night.

627
00:37:22,541 --> 00:37:25,375
Look, these guys, they stole my
watch, they stole my identity.

628
00:37:25,377 --> 00:37:28,011
Yup, yup, yup.
Well, I think I have enough.

629
00:37:28,013 --> 00:37:29,813
- You don't have a enough.
- They held us and gunpoint.

630
00:37:29,815 --> 00:37:31,281
I have enough
to get you bail.

631
00:37:31,283 --> 00:37:32,916
But you don't need bail
in the UK.

632
00:37:32,918 --> 00:37:34,484
This is not the UK.

633
00:37:34,486 --> 00:37:36,686
It's an island
Crown dependency.

634
00:37:36,688 --> 00:37:38,788
You can get to
the mainland on a rowboat.

635
00:37:38,790 --> 00:37:42,759
You need bail.
So, who do I call?

636
00:37:42,761 --> 00:37:45,028
- I don't know.
- No one springs to mind.

637
00:37:45,030 --> 00:37:46,296
Me neither.

638
00:37:48,700 --> 00:37:49,899
Okay.

639
00:37:52,404 --> 00:37:55,905
Tell me a very,
very interesting story.

640
00:37:58,877 --> 00:38:01,544
Hello, Danno.
Look, I'm sorry it's so late.

641
00:38:01,546 --> 00:38:03,713
Uh, it's Statton.

642
00:38:03,715 --> 00:38:06,549
Yeah, right back to you.
Yeah, fine, fine.

643
00:38:06,551 --> 00:38:09,886
How are you? Uh, look, sorry,
mate, I need to get to the point.

644
00:38:09,888 --> 00:38:13,056
Do you remember a guy
called Kipper from your party?

645
00:38:13,058 --> 00:38:15,725
Yeah, do you know
his surname?

646
00:38:15,727 --> 00:38:20,063
- Oh, no, he doesn't know.
- Give me that.

647
00:38:20,065 --> 00:38:23,733
Danno, are you Catholic?

648
00:38:23,735 --> 00:38:25,902
Well, I'm a virgin
motherfucking nun

649
00:38:25,904 --> 00:38:28,305
and I need you to
reach back down there

650
00:38:28,307 --> 00:38:31,574
into you subconscious and figure the
fuck out what Kipper's last name is

651
00:38:31,576 --> 00:38:34,744
or I'll personally see to it
that you're stuck in Purgatory

652
00:38:34,746 --> 00:38:37,914
for the duration of your
natural born death!

653
00:38:37,916 --> 00:38:39,582
Whew! Oof.

654
00:38:39,584 --> 00:38:40,750
Yup.

655
00:38:43,522 --> 00:38:45,555
Motherfucker.

656
00:38:49,928 --> 00:38:52,462
Get the hospital
on the phone now.

657
00:38:52,464 --> 00:38:54,364
Right. What was
his sidekick's name?

658
00:38:54,366 --> 00:38:57,967
I don't remember.
I'm not very good with names.

659
00:38:59,471 --> 00:39:01,838
They did say.
I did a mnemonic.

660
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:03,073
You used my mnemonics?

661
00:39:03,075 --> 00:39:05,108
I pictured the Titanic.

662
00:39:05,110 --> 00:39:06,876
Rearranging deck chairs
on the Titanic.

663
00:39:06,878 --> 00:39:08,511
His name is Deck Chair!

664
00:39:08,513 --> 00:39:09,646
Dec. Short for Declan.

665
00:39:09,648 --> 00:39:10,647
Dec, Dec.
His name's Dec.

666
00:39:10,649 --> 00:39:11,915
Uh...

667
00:39:13,618 --> 00:39:16,519
Yeah, Kipper's gone.

668
00:39:16,521 --> 00:39:18,621
He walked out
of the hospital

669
00:39:18,623 --> 00:39:22,025
when Officer Dean went to
get him a chocolate bickie.

670
00:39:23,962 --> 00:39:25,628
Go and make up
a better story

671
00:39:25,630 --> 00:39:27,797
of how this criminal
got away.

672
00:39:27,799 --> 00:39:30,133
Ideally, one that doesn't
make me look like a prick

673
00:39:30,135 --> 00:39:32,435
for allowing the two
of you out of the station.

674
00:39:34,806 --> 00:39:36,673
Go.

675
00:39:39,511 --> 00:39:42,779
- Could we go?
- You're still charged with possession of cocaine.

676
00:39:42,781 --> 00:39:45,648
I think under
the circumstances, Sergeant,

677
00:39:45,650 --> 00:39:47,650
all charges
should be dropped.

678
00:39:47,652 --> 00:39:49,919
Do you?
Sadly, I disagree.

679
00:39:49,921 --> 00:39:54,524
Officer,
the drugs were mine.

680
00:39:54,526 --> 00:39:56,826
Statton had nothing
to do with it.

681
00:39:56,828 --> 00:39:58,528
Well, he was holding them,

682
00:39:58,530 --> 00:40:00,029
which means
you're both in possession

683
00:40:00,031 --> 00:40:02,665
with conspiracy to pervert
the course of justice.

684
00:40:02,667 --> 00:40:06,403
Your bail just doubled,
you numpties!

685
00:40:23,555 --> 00:40:26,790
Dec, I am out. I'm out.

686
00:40:26,792 --> 00:40:30,560
Oh, good. They'll be out
sooner or later, too.

687
00:40:30,562 --> 00:40:31,828
We got to get rid of them.

688
00:40:31,830 --> 00:40:33,463
No, no, no, no,
it's too late.

689
00:40:33,465 --> 00:40:34,664
Too late,
they'll definitely

690
00:40:34,666 --> 00:40:35,865
have talked by now,
definitely.

691
00:40:35,867 --> 00:40:37,033
Yeah, but you can't
have a trial

692
00:40:37,035 --> 00:40:39,035
without witnesses,
can you, buddy?

693
00:40:39,037 --> 00:40:42,906
<i>I told you, right,
not to go into a room</i>

694
00:40:42,908 --> 00:40:45,041
where people
were still awake.

695
00:40:45,043 --> 00:40:47,043
I told you
it was reckless.

696
00:40:47,045 --> 00:40:48,478
But you didn't listen.

697
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,046
It was just meant to be
a bit of fun.

698
00:40:50,048 --> 00:40:51,681
Something funny
to tell the boys.

699
00:40:51,683 --> 00:40:53,583
Yeah, well, I'll tell you
what is funny, okay?

700
00:40:53,585 --> 00:40:55,585
I gotta lay low, Dec? Okay?
The cops are after me

701
00:40:55,587 --> 00:40:57,053
and they don't know
what you look like!

702
00:40:57,055 --> 00:41:01,224
Does your kid know
what you look like?

703
00:41:01,226 --> 00:41:03,092
Because at this rate,
he'll be identifying

704
00:41:03,094 --> 00:41:06,229
your dead body
in the morgue, mate.

705
00:41:15,140 --> 00:41:18,074
Hello, Denise,
I'm sorry to wake you.

706
00:41:18,076 --> 00:41:22,912
Um, I'm in the police station.

707
00:41:22,914 --> 00:41:24,247
I really don't want to ask,

708
00:41:24,249 --> 00:41:30,920
but, uh, could you, um,
bail me out?

709
00:41:30,922 --> 00:41:33,890
And my friend?

710
00:41:35,694 --> 00:41:38,661
- Denise, thanks. Look--
- This your friend?

711
00:41:38,663 --> 00:41:40,630
Yeah.

712
00:41:40,632 --> 00:41:42,565
Can I have a word
with you please?

713
00:41:42,567 --> 00:41:45,168
Um, sure.

714
00:42:00,118 --> 00:42:04,621
Okay, I'll bail you out,
but you got take him.

715
00:42:04,623 --> 00:42:07,290
- What?
- He can't come back to me.

716
00:42:07,292 --> 00:42:08,791
Look, I don't know
what you think this is--

717
00:42:08,793 --> 00:42:10,927
We broke up a year ago--

718
00:42:10,929 --> 00:42:13,563
sorry,
I don't know your name.

719
00:42:14,966 --> 00:42:16,799
Call me Carol.

720
00:42:16,801 --> 00:42:20,136
Carol, please,
we broke up a year ago.

721
00:42:20,138 --> 00:42:22,605
- Got a divorce.
- Well, he said separated.

722
00:42:22,607 --> 00:42:26,709
He always says that.
We signed divorce papers.

723
00:42:26,711 --> 00:42:29,679
He said he was gonna
get his own place,

724
00:42:29,681 --> 00:42:30,813
he was just staying
on the sofa bed

725
00:42:30,815 --> 00:42:32,315
- for a couple of weeks.
- Yeah.

726
00:42:32,317 --> 00:42:34,817
Well, I've started
seeing someone else.

727
00:42:34,819 --> 00:42:37,086
Six months went by,
new guy wants to move in.

728
00:42:37,088 --> 00:42:39,822
- Oh, I see.
- Do you know, tonight is the first night

729
00:42:39,824 --> 00:42:41,858
that he stayed out
after 10:00?

730
00:42:41,860 --> 00:42:47,830
I was so hopeful.
I thought, "This is it.

731
00:42:47,832 --> 00:42:50,833
He's met someone.
He's gonna go!"

732
00:42:50,835 --> 00:42:52,835
I think it's more
of a one-night kinda--

733
00:42:52,837 --> 00:42:54,837
No. No, it can't be.

734
00:42:54,839 --> 00:42:57,707
I'll pay you to be
his transitional girl.

735
00:42:57,709 --> 00:42:58,942
I mean, I'll bail you out.

736
00:42:58,944 --> 00:43:00,610
Well, can't you just
ask him to leave?

737
00:43:00,612 --> 00:43:06,049
I've tried to!
He just keeps not leaving.

738
00:43:06,051 --> 00:43:09,852
I have come home
furious as fuck,

739
00:43:09,854 --> 00:43:12,188
ready to throw him out,
change the locks,

740
00:43:12,190 --> 00:43:14,724
and he's just...

741
00:43:14,726 --> 00:43:16,192
he's cooked a risotto,

742
00:43:16,194 --> 00:43:19,329
changed my light bulbs.

743
00:43:19,331 --> 00:43:21,364
He's just not
the sort of guy

744
00:43:21,366 --> 00:43:25,201
who you can throw out.

745
00:43:25,203 --> 00:43:28,037
But now, now!
This is his own fault, you know.

746
00:43:28,039 --> 00:43:30,873
I can do this now.
It might be my last shot.

747
00:43:30,875 --> 00:43:34,043
- I don't know.
- Skip bail if you want.

748
00:43:34,045 --> 00:43:35,378
Get the ferry
to the mainland.

749
00:43:35,380 --> 00:43:37,347
I don't care,
just take him with you.

750
00:43:37,349 --> 00:43:40,116
I beg you.

751
00:43:47,359 --> 00:43:50,393
Do you take plastic?

752
00:43:51,763 --> 00:43:53,229
You're throwing me out?

753
00:43:53,231 --> 00:43:56,399
No, you're leaving me
for her.

754
00:43:56,401 --> 00:43:57,900
But I need to come home.
I just got robbed.

755
00:43:57,902 --> 00:44:00,403
I haven't got any money.

756
00:44:00,405 --> 00:44:02,071
All right, you can have
what I've got in my purse,

757
00:44:02,073 --> 00:44:03,773
then call the bank tomorrow.

758
00:44:03,775 --> 00:44:07,076
You're in luck. Here's 100.
Good luck, Statton.

759
00:44:07,078 --> 00:44:09,912
- What about my stuff, my--
- I'll send it on.

760
00:44:13,251 --> 00:44:16,052
Where to?

761
00:44:16,053 --> 00:44:18,854
Babe, ask Carol, huh?
You live with her now.

762
00:44:27,932 --> 00:44:30,099
We made a deal.

763
00:44:36,107 --> 00:44:39,942
Statton! Statton, wait.

764
00:44:39,944 --> 00:44:41,444
Wait.

765
00:44:41,446 --> 00:44:43,346
Statton, Statton.

766
00:44:43,348 --> 00:44:46,449
Wait! Come on!

767
00:44:46,451 --> 00:44:48,818
I can't believe you did
a deal for me.

768
00:44:48,820 --> 00:44:52,121
- I'm not property.
- I didn't have much choice,

769
00:44:52,123 --> 00:44:53,823
and she seemed
kind of desperate.

770
00:44:53,825 --> 00:44:56,459
- I'm not living with you.
- Oh, really?

771
00:44:56,461 --> 00:45:00,229
But I thought we were gonna register
for twin babies and matching china.

772
00:45:00,231 --> 00:45:03,466
I hate you, I hate you!
You're a curse of a woman.

773
00:45:03,468 --> 00:45:05,201
Why are you even here?

774
00:45:17,782 --> 00:45:20,349
Let me give you
some cash, okay?

775
00:45:20,351 --> 00:45:22,085
I don't want to
leave you stranded.

776
00:45:22,087 --> 00:45:24,854
I know how hard
the vow of poverty is.

777
00:45:24,856 --> 00:45:26,155
Okay.

778
00:45:26,157 --> 00:45:29,158
- Look.
- Thanks.

779
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:32,495
Well, you want me to
buy you a drink or not?

780
00:45:32,497 --> 00:45:34,330
You're going drinking now?

781
00:45:34,332 --> 00:45:37,166
No, I'm gonna find out
where my pendant is.

782
00:45:37,168 --> 00:45:39,001
- Why?
- It doesn't matter.

783
00:45:39,003 --> 00:45:41,003
Well, exactly!
So, leave it!

784
00:45:41,005 --> 00:45:43,339
My birth mother left it
at the hospital for me.

785
00:45:43,341 --> 00:45:45,408
- What?
- I'm adopted.

786
00:45:47,879 --> 00:45:49,345
Well, I didn't know.

787
00:45:49,347 --> 00:45:52,181
I didn't either,
until I did.

788
00:45:52,183 --> 00:45:54,517
And, well, she left it
for me when I was born

789
00:45:54,519 --> 00:45:58,888
and I've never taken it off
since I've had it.

790
00:45:58,890 --> 00:46:01,357
- Not before tonight.
- Oh.

791
00:46:01,359 --> 00:46:03,359
And I know you think
it's just stupid

792
00:46:03,361 --> 00:46:05,027
or just a thing or
whatever, but you know what?

793
00:46:05,029 --> 00:46:06,362
I don't care
what you think.

794
00:46:06,364 --> 00:46:10,032
I'm getting
my necklace back.

795
00:46:10,034 --> 00:46:12,201
And you might
as well come with me,

796
00:46:12,203 --> 00:46:13,970
you have nowhere
else to go.

797
00:46:16,207 --> 00:46:19,976
And I bet who ever it's been
hawked to is in the streets.

798
00:46:38,062 --> 00:46:42,064
Oh, my God!
It's Bollocks McGiven!

799
00:46:42,066 --> 00:46:44,934
- Bollocks!
- Bollocks McGiven?

800
00:46:44,936 --> 00:46:47,236
Oh, a long story
involving a night in Dublin,

801
00:46:47,238 --> 00:46:50,072
a poker game,
and a frying pan.

802
00:46:50,074 --> 00:46:54,243
Oh, Bollocks!
The unit's broken down again.

803
00:46:54,245 --> 00:46:55,912
Would you mind coming by
and having a look?

804
00:46:55,914 --> 00:46:59,382
Sure, it's probably the
throttle body cleaner again.

805
00:46:59,384 --> 00:47:01,317
Oh, you're adorable!

806
00:47:01,319 --> 00:47:05,822
Hey. You wanna Brexit?
Go back to my place?

807
00:47:05,824 --> 00:47:08,958
- Oh, not tonight.
- Aww.

808
00:47:08,960 --> 00:47:11,961
Do you know where
I can score in here?

809
00:47:11,963 --> 00:47:15,498
Oh.

810
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:18,367
Sorry, kid, you need cash.

811
00:47:18,369 --> 00:47:20,570
I don't give credit
to customers I don't know.

812
00:47:20,572 --> 00:47:24,540
I swear I'm good for it.
I was robbed tonight!

813
00:47:24,542 --> 00:47:26,442
There were these guys
with guns--

814
00:47:26,444 --> 00:47:28,277
All right! All right!

815
00:47:28,279 --> 00:47:30,513
Save your stories
for some Oprah who cares.

816
00:47:37,288 --> 00:47:41,023
Hey! Did you used to do
a stripping nun act?

817
00:47:43,628 --> 00:47:46,295
No. Must have been
someone else.

818
00:47:54,339 --> 00:47:56,372
What the fuck?

819
00:47:56,374 --> 00:47:59,475
If you talk to a drug dealer
without buying drugs,

820
00:47:59,477 --> 00:48:01,644
they start to get suspicious,
and he's the guy

821
00:48:01,646 --> 00:48:03,646
who'll know
who's got my pendant.

822
00:48:03,648 --> 00:48:06,482
In a half hour,
that guy will be my BF and F,

823
00:48:06,484 --> 00:48:08,417
and 'effing tell me
everything I need to know.

824
00:48:08,419 --> 00:48:10,319
Just get rid of it.

825
00:48:10,321 --> 00:48:12,154
Mmm.

826
00:48:12,156 --> 00:48:14,523
I was hoping you would.

827
00:48:14,525 --> 00:48:18,027
There's absolutely no point
in doing hard time for holding

828
00:48:18,029 --> 00:48:19,362
if you're not gonna
have any fun.

829
00:48:19,364 --> 00:48:21,664
I mean, that's just--
that's just embarrassing.

830
00:48:21,666 --> 00:48:24,934
I just don't drink and drug.

831
00:48:28,172 --> 00:48:30,039
You've never done it
before, have you?

832
00:48:30,041 --> 00:48:32,408
What? Yeah...

833
00:48:36,514 --> 00:48:39,015
And I kicked the gun
out of his hand, right?

834
00:48:39,017 --> 00:48:41,117
It flew up in the air and I caught it,
and I put it to his head, and was like,

835
00:48:41,119 --> 00:48:42,652
"Don't move, motherfucker,
or I'll blow your head off."

836
00:48:42,654 --> 00:48:44,353
And then police, they've
surrounded the building.

837
00:48:44,355 --> 00:48:45,955
They're like,
"Come out with your hands up."

838
00:48:45,957 --> 00:48:47,456
And I was like, "Don't
worry, lads, I got this."

839
00:49:30,568 --> 00:49:32,234
Bollocks!

840
00:49:32,236 --> 00:49:34,303
I'm busting like
the six dams out here!

841
00:49:34,305 --> 00:49:37,640
And if you've got any drugs,
I'd love some.

842
00:49:39,110 --> 00:49:40,743
I'll be right out, Kitty.

843
00:49:44,549 --> 00:49:46,248
The duty manager
comes to the door, right?

844
00:49:46,250 --> 00:49:48,017
And I knew
it was either him or me.

845
00:49:48,019 --> 00:49:50,152
And he's just
an innocent guy, you know?

846
00:49:50,154 --> 00:49:52,121
He's probably got a family.
I don't want him to die.

847
00:49:52,123 --> 00:49:54,457
The strangest thing is,
I don't even know karate,

848
00:49:54,459 --> 00:49:56,425
but I jumped off the bed,
knocked him to the floor,

849
00:49:56,427 --> 00:49:57,426
and the bullet went over
our heads.

850
00:49:57,428 --> 00:49:58,761
I fucking love this song.

851
00:49:58,763 --> 00:50:03,766
♪ If you call out my name ♪

852
00:50:03,768 --> 00:50:07,436
♪ I'll keep you safe ♪

853
00:50:07,438 --> 00:50:10,773
♪ 'Cause I wanna
fight for love ♪

854
00:50:10,775 --> 00:50:12,241
<i>♪ If you call out my name ♪</i>

855
00:50:12,243 --> 00:50:16,445
So, if I wanted to
get rid of some jewelry,

856
00:50:16,447 --> 00:50:20,616
something I borrowed,
who'd be interested?

857
00:50:20,618 --> 00:50:22,785
You tried eBay?

858
00:50:22,787 --> 00:50:25,287
I know that guy.

859
00:50:25,289 --> 00:50:29,158
Yeah, I helped that guy get
a cat out of a piano once.

860
00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:32,628
- What?
- I'm a vet.

861
00:50:32,630 --> 00:50:34,597
You get called in
to do the craziest shit.

862
00:50:34,599 --> 00:50:36,165
Theo loves that story,
don't you, Theo?

863
00:50:36,167 --> 00:50:38,100
Victor, you've given away
the punchline now.

864
00:50:38,102 --> 00:50:41,170
Hey, Buddy! It's all right, Asbo.

865
00:50:41,172 --> 00:50:42,371
Dec wants you to call
him, back.

866
00:50:42,373 --> 00:50:44,640
He says it's urgent.

867
00:50:44,642 --> 00:50:47,676
Tell him we've found
what he's looking for.

868
00:50:53,651 --> 00:50:56,719
- I gotta go.
- Wait, you haven't heard the story yet.

869
00:50:59,323 --> 00:51:00,389
Tell her the story.

870
00:51:02,560 --> 00:51:06,729
<i>♪ 'Cause I'm gonna fight
for love ♪</i>

871
00:51:28,553 --> 00:51:30,719
Motherfucker!

872
00:51:39,764 --> 00:51:41,497
No, no, no, no.
I attacked him in front

873
00:51:41,499 --> 00:51:43,532
of a police officer
completely unprovoked.

874
00:51:43,534 --> 00:51:45,334
- I have to plead guilty.
- You never have to plead guilty.

875
00:51:45,336 --> 00:51:46,869
I want to plead guilty.

876
00:51:46,871 --> 00:51:49,238
It was the greatest moment
of my life.

877
00:51:49,240 --> 00:51:50,539
I don't want to deny it.

878
00:51:50,541 --> 00:51:53,542
Hey, guilty makes
my life easy.

879
00:51:53,544 --> 00:51:56,145
And the police are
looking for Mary, right?

880
00:51:56,147 --> 00:51:58,714
Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

881
00:51:58,716 --> 00:52:01,383
If you want my advice,
as a legal professional,

882
00:52:01,385 --> 00:52:03,152
don't worry about her.

883
00:52:03,154 --> 00:52:05,221
She's a very
capable lady, mm-hmm. Eh?

884
00:52:07,758 --> 00:52:11,260
So, how long
are we gonna wait here?

885
00:52:11,262 --> 00:52:14,163
Until Kipper calls us back and
decides what to do with you.

886
00:52:21,405 --> 00:52:23,572
We shouldn't have left
Asbo at the bar.

887
00:52:23,574 --> 00:52:25,174
Well, there's a new scent
in the car, man.

888
00:52:25,176 --> 00:52:27,143
Do you want him barking,
drawing attention?

889
00:52:27,145 --> 00:52:30,146
He doesn't like being tied
up, though. You know that.

890
00:52:30,148 --> 00:52:32,648
- He's a dog, man!
- Yeah, but dogs have feelings.

891
00:52:47,598 --> 00:52:48,898
Hmm.

892
00:52:56,307 --> 00:52:57,640
Can I have some gum?

893
00:53:04,615 --> 00:53:05,681
Thanks.

894
00:53:15,459 --> 00:53:19,461
So what's it like,
being a dealer?

895
00:53:19,463 --> 00:53:22,965
- It's a living.
- It's not like being a shopkeeper then?

896
00:53:22,967 --> 00:53:26,635
Did Kipper say that?
Is he still going on about that?

897
00:53:26,637 --> 00:53:29,805
I've told him before,
it's a dangerous game.

898
00:53:29,807 --> 00:53:31,974
It's not like running
a Tesco Metro!

899
00:53:31,976 --> 00:53:34,810
- Jesus Christ!
- Well, he didn't say that exactly.

900
00:53:34,812 --> 00:53:36,245
Oh, yes, he did.
I know him.

901
00:53:36,247 --> 00:53:37,646
Don't let her wind you up.

902
00:53:37,648 --> 00:53:40,816
I'm sorry.
I should have said anything.

903
00:53:40,818 --> 00:53:44,253
I'm just thinking of
a career change, that's all.

904
00:53:46,657 --> 00:53:49,491
Can you really buy a degree?

905
00:53:49,493 --> 00:53:52,828
I didn't buy a degree, right?
I did a course.

906
00:53:52,830 --> 00:53:55,998
On the Internet.
Distance learning is the future.

907
00:53:56,000 --> 00:53:59,368
That's what I told Kipper,
and he said an Internet degree

908
00:53:59,370 --> 00:54:01,670
is not worth the email
it's attached to.

909
00:54:01,672 --> 00:54:04,506
- Fucking Kipper!
- You know, you guys shouldn't worry

910
00:54:04,508 --> 00:54:07,009
about anything that guy says.

911
00:54:07,011 --> 00:54:09,511
He got shot
in the leg tonight--

912
00:54:09,513 --> 00:54:12,014
twice--
trying to rob a hotel.

913
00:54:12,016 --> 00:54:15,684
I mean, who does
he think he is, Al Capone?

914
00:54:15,686 --> 00:54:17,686
Oh, he's a fucking amateur.

915
00:54:17,688 --> 00:54:19,688
And "Kipper"?
What's with that name?

916
00:54:19,690 --> 00:54:21,857
It's a nickname.
Do you wanna know how he got it?

917
00:54:21,859 --> 00:54:24,693
Oh, my God, so much.
Is it embarrassing?

918
00:54:24,695 --> 00:54:26,629
Oh, you have no idea.

919
00:54:56,060 --> 00:54:59,561
Dec wants you dead, kid.
He won't do 20 years.

920
00:54:59,563 --> 00:55:02,064
So, get on the first ferry to the
mainland in the morning, okay?

921
00:55:02,066 --> 00:55:05,567
Okay, I will. Thanks, guys.

922
00:55:05,569 --> 00:55:09,071
And if you are gonna make those
Welsh cakes, don't forget...

923
00:55:09,073 --> 00:55:12,441
- grease the griddle pan--
- With lard!

924
00:55:12,443 --> 00:55:13,976
Oh, come here.

925
00:55:21,752 --> 00:55:24,586
And by the way, it was me

926
00:55:24,588 --> 00:55:26,422
who did the stripping nun act.

927
00:55:26,424 --> 00:55:28,924
I knew it!

928
00:55:38,769 --> 00:55:42,771
- Well, look who's in trouble again.
- Mary!

929
00:55:42,773 --> 00:55:45,074
Oh, thank God.
I was so worried.

930
00:55:45,076 --> 00:55:49,912
- What are you doing here?
- Someone had to bail you out.

931
00:55:49,914 --> 00:55:54,016
- You don't have any money.
- Will you take plastic?

932
00:55:58,789 --> 00:56:02,624
Thank you, Reverend Mother.
I really appreciate this.

933
00:56:02,626 --> 00:56:04,626
Don't thank me,
thank Father Donald.

934
00:56:04,628 --> 00:56:09,031
- It's his credit card.
- He always had a crush on me.

935
00:56:12,636 --> 00:56:15,971
Father Donald better get
every penny of this back,

936
00:56:15,973 --> 00:56:19,842
and some reward points.

937
00:56:23,414 --> 00:56:28,650
- Where are you taking me?
- Please, just follow me, okay?

938
00:56:28,652 --> 00:56:32,821
We should find somewhere to
hide until the first ferry.

939
00:56:32,823 --> 00:56:36,992
I am getting off this God forsaken
island and never coming back.

940
00:56:36,994 --> 00:56:39,995
Well, I can't leave, can I?
Where would I go?

941
00:56:39,997 --> 00:56:42,931
Um, somewhere where
no one wants to kill you?

942
00:56:42,933 --> 00:56:48,537
- I don't have--
- Statton, when was the last time

943
00:56:48,539 --> 00:56:50,005
you went to the mainland?

944
00:56:50,007 --> 00:56:54,843
Uh, probably my stag night?

945
00:56:54,845 --> 00:56:57,179
I don't remember much
of that, to be honest.

946
00:56:57,181 --> 00:57:02,184
- And how long ago was that?
- Uh, eight years ago.

947
00:57:02,186 --> 00:57:05,687
Eight years?
Wait, you haven't been off this tiny island

948
00:57:05,689 --> 00:57:06,755
in eight years?

949
00:57:08,025 --> 00:57:09,558
I haven't really
had the time.

950
00:57:09,560 --> 00:57:11,727
Yes, you have.

951
00:57:11,729 --> 00:57:13,896
When was the last time
you lived somewhere else?

952
00:57:13,898 --> 00:57:16,932
Did you go away
to college or...

953
00:57:19,570 --> 00:57:22,204
You've never lived
anywhere else but here?

954
00:57:22,206 --> 00:57:24,039
All right, that's it, buddy.

955
00:57:24,041 --> 00:57:26,575
We are getting off this island
if we have to swim for it.

956
00:57:26,577 --> 00:57:28,043
No, no, no, no.
Wait, please.

957
00:57:28,045 --> 00:57:31,947
Just... it's a surprise.

958
00:57:34,585 --> 00:57:36,585
All in all,
I'd say I'm very good

959
00:57:36,587 --> 00:57:39,488
- for surprises this evening.
- One more?

960
00:57:40,591 --> 00:57:42,891
Okay.

961
00:58:03,614 --> 00:58:05,247
The convent?

962
00:58:05,249 --> 00:58:08,517
Just wait in the chapel.
I'll be back.

963
00:58:23,934 --> 00:58:27,269
Hi, sorry to bother you.
My name's Statton.

964
00:58:27,271 --> 00:58:30,205
Um, I actually went
to Sunday school here.

965
00:58:30,207 --> 00:58:32,274
Um, that's irrelevant.

966
00:58:32,276 --> 00:58:36,945
Um, I'm a friend--
an acquaintance of Dec... lan?

967
00:58:36,947 --> 00:58:38,914
Don't know no Declan.

968
00:58:38,916 --> 00:58:41,884
Scottish?
Very-- quite angry.

969
00:58:41,886 --> 00:58:44,653
He said you might have
a necklace.

970
00:58:44,655 --> 00:58:46,221
Don't know
about no necklace.

971
00:58:46,223 --> 00:58:50,526
- And the pendant or...
- Eh.

972
00:58:50,528 --> 00:58:53,195
Are you sure?
'Cause, I mean, he was quite adamant.

973
00:58:53,197 --> 00:58:56,798
All right, all right.

974
00:58:56,800 --> 00:58:58,867
I had it, but I haven't
got it anymore.

975
00:58:58,869 --> 00:59:03,305
Oh. Where is it?

976
00:59:03,307 --> 00:59:06,008
Give me a minute.
I'll call the guy and get it back to you.

977
00:59:06,010 --> 00:59:07,743
Oh, thank you very much.

978
00:59:07,745 --> 00:59:10,312
It'll cost you.
500 at least.

979
00:59:10,314 --> 00:59:14,016
- Sure.
- Wait in the chapel.

980
00:59:14,985 --> 00:59:16,685
Are you online?

981
00:59:16,687 --> 00:59:18,921
I could do
a bank transfer, you see?

982
00:59:41,345 --> 00:59:43,779
Who's that?

983
00:59:43,781 --> 00:59:47,849
- Saint Tropez.
- Oh, yeah.

984
00:59:47,851 --> 00:59:49,851
Patron saint of suntans.

985
00:59:49,853 --> 00:59:52,854
Heh. Suntans?

986
00:59:52,856 --> 00:59:56,291
Okay, but it is Saint Tropez.

987
00:59:56,293 --> 01:00:00,028
He was decapitated by Nero,

988
01:00:00,030 --> 01:00:03,966
who set him adrift in a boat
with a rooster and a dog.

989
01:00:03,968 --> 01:00:06,668
Rougher night than ours.

990
01:00:06,670 --> 01:00:11,873
So, what's all the mystery?
What's the big surprise?

991
01:00:11,875 --> 01:00:14,209
Have you resubmitted
my application to the convent?

992
01:00:14,211 --> 01:00:17,012
'Cause I really don't think
they're gonna reconsider.

993
01:00:17,014 --> 01:00:21,083
Just... wait and see.

994
01:00:24,221 --> 01:00:26,388
Kipper, they're here.

995
01:00:26,390 --> 01:00:27,956
I don't know how long
I can hold them.

996
01:00:31,061 --> 01:00:34,229
Okay, confess something.

997
01:00:34,231 --> 01:00:38,233
Um, if a customer upsets me

998
01:00:38,235 --> 01:00:43,405
sometimes I make
their D slightly sharp.

999
01:00:43,407 --> 01:00:47,109
- True.
- True.

1000
01:00:47,111 --> 01:00:52,114
I had an affair with
my math teacher's wife.

1001
01:00:52,116 --> 01:00:56,652
- That's gotta be false.
- True.

1002
01:00:56,654 --> 01:00:59,354
Sometimes when
I run out of underwear,

1003
01:00:59,356 --> 01:01:02,257
I'd borrow
my wife's boyfriend's.

1004
01:01:02,259 --> 01:01:05,827
- Um, true.
- True.

1005
01:01:05,829 --> 01:01:08,096
When I was a nun,

1006
01:01:08,098 --> 01:01:10,098
I was in a death metal band

1007
01:01:10,100 --> 01:01:12,200
called "Clitty Slickers."

1008
01:01:12,202 --> 01:01:14,369
True. Definitely true.

1009
01:01:14,371 --> 01:01:18,807
- False.
- I wasn't sure you were telling the truth

1010
01:01:18,809 --> 01:01:22,844
about being a nun until
Mother Superior turned up.

1011
01:01:22,846 --> 01:01:25,113
Okay.

1012
01:01:25,115 --> 01:01:26,815
Well, I didn't believe
for one minute

1013
01:01:26,817 --> 01:01:28,884
you were really
separated from your wife.

1014
01:01:33,190 --> 01:01:36,058
What was your worst
relationship?

1015
01:01:36,060 --> 01:01:38,827
Uh...

1016
01:01:38,829 --> 01:01:41,129
- My wife.
- Hmm.

1017
01:01:41,131 --> 01:01:44,032
- And your best?
- My wife.

1018
01:01:47,738 --> 01:01:52,240
You know what?
I think this is better.

1019
01:01:52,242 --> 01:01:54,342
Then it must have
been really bad.

1020
01:01:54,344 --> 01:01:58,914
It lacked, uh... romance.

1021
01:02:14,965 --> 01:02:16,898
We're gonna get it back.

1022
01:02:16,900 --> 01:02:19,000
You don't know that.

1023
01:02:19,002 --> 01:02:20,368
Mmm. That's why we're here.

1024
01:02:20,370 --> 01:02:23,872
- What?
- Father Donald's got it.

1025
01:02:23,874 --> 01:02:25,874
Well, he had it.
He's getting it back.

1026
01:02:25,876 --> 01:02:28,210
How did you find this out?

1027
01:02:28,212 --> 01:02:30,746
Dec told me
in the police station.

1028
01:02:30,748 --> 01:02:33,181
Dec told you?

1029
01:02:33,183 --> 01:02:34,883
And why do you think
he'd do that, Statton?

1030
01:02:34,885 --> 01:02:39,054
Because I paid him.

1031
01:02:39,056 --> 01:02:43,358
You paid him? You paid him.

1032
01:02:43,360 --> 01:02:46,027
What kind of fuckwittery
did they teach you

1033
01:02:46,029 --> 01:02:47,896
in piano tuning school?

1034
01:02:47,898 --> 01:02:50,365
Dec wants us dead,
and you just paid him

1035
01:02:50,367 --> 01:02:53,535
to tell us where to go
so he could have us killed.

1036
01:02:53,537 --> 01:02:56,238
Father Donald is a priest.
We can trust him.

1037
01:02:56,240 --> 01:03:00,909
Dodgy Donald? He's receiving stolen goods.
Think it through!

1038
01:03:00,911 --> 01:03:04,513
He's a priest that could
afford to bail us out.

1039
01:03:04,515 --> 01:03:06,114
Come on, we gotta
get out of here.

1040
01:03:09,219 --> 01:03:11,119
Fuck, I knew it!

1041
01:03:12,055 --> 01:03:13,388
Sorry, Mary,
I thought that--

1042
01:03:13,390 --> 01:03:15,423
Well, start thinking
of a way out.

1043
01:03:15,425 --> 01:03:18,560
Sure, uh, um...

1044
01:03:18,562 --> 01:03:21,396
- Windows!
- These windows are lead lined

1045
01:03:21,398 --> 01:03:23,498
and too high
to climb out of anyway.

1046
01:03:23,500 --> 01:03:26,368
No, no, we need to
attract attention.

1047
01:03:26,370 --> 01:03:28,303
Uh...

1048
01:04:01,438 --> 01:04:04,339
Get up. Move.

1049
01:04:06,610 --> 01:04:09,277
We've already been
to the police, Kipper.

1050
01:04:09,279 --> 01:04:10,879
There's no point.

1051
01:04:10,881 --> 01:04:13,315
No point going
down for murder.

1052
01:04:13,317 --> 01:04:15,617
It's only armed robbery.
No one got hurt.

1053
01:04:15,619 --> 01:04:19,454
Dec says if he gets armed
robbery, he goes down for twenty.

1054
01:04:19,456 --> 01:04:23,158
Dec gets 20, I get dead,
kids-- no dad. Hmm?

1055
01:04:23,160 --> 01:04:25,260
We'll refuse to testify.

1056
01:04:27,464 --> 01:04:30,632
Dec's not the sort of guy
you could do a deal with.

1057
01:04:30,634 --> 01:04:34,369
I don't want to do it.
I have to do it.

1058
01:04:34,371 --> 01:04:40,275
- You don't have to do--
- I have to do it!

1059
01:04:40,277 --> 01:04:44,212
Okay, okay.
You have to do it.

1060
01:04:44,214 --> 01:04:50,452
But can we-- can we at least
talk awhile before you do it?

1061
01:04:52,990 --> 01:04:54,089
Sure.

1062
01:05:01,431 --> 01:05:03,632
I want you to know that
I've never done this before.

1063
01:05:03,634 --> 01:05:07,469
You don't have to
kill anyone today, Kipper.

1064
01:05:07,471 --> 01:05:10,138
You don't have
to do what Dec says.

1065
01:05:10,140 --> 01:05:12,240
You're not the sidekick.

1066
01:05:12,242 --> 01:05:15,343
Don't call me...

1067
01:05:15,345 --> 01:05:17,679
an 'effing sidekick, okay?

1068
01:05:17,681 --> 01:05:19,381
- I hate being a sidekick.
- I know, I know.

1069
01:05:19,383 --> 01:05:21,016
Okay, I'm gonna do it.

1070
01:05:21,018 --> 01:05:22,317
- Oh.
- Oh, no, no. No, no.

1071
01:05:22,319 --> 01:05:23,618
I'm gonna do it
and then I'm gonna go.

1072
01:05:23,620 --> 01:05:26,621
Okay.

1073
01:05:26,623 --> 01:05:28,990
Just let me say
my prayers first.

1074
01:05:28,992 --> 01:05:31,192
You still believe?

1075
01:05:31,194 --> 01:05:33,261
Technically,
I'm still a nun.

1076
01:05:33,263 --> 01:05:36,698
- Hmm? How?
- Well, I was never defrocked

1077
01:05:36,700 --> 01:05:39,968
'cause I was just a novice,
so they didn't bother.

1078
01:05:39,970 --> 01:05:41,536
Well, you were pretty well defrocked
tonight, love, in the hotel.

1079
01:05:41,538 --> 01:05:43,171
I saw you, okay?
Some nun you are.

1080
01:05:43,173 --> 01:05:46,341
Lots of nuns sin, Kipper.
We're only human.

1081
01:05:50,714 --> 01:05:53,214
Okay.

1082
01:05:53,216 --> 01:05:55,417
Okay, ask for forgiveness.
Come on.

1083
01:05:55,419 --> 01:05:57,452
And say one for me.

1084
01:06:07,731 --> 01:06:13,635
Dear Lord, please forgive me
for my sins of the flesh.

1085
01:06:15,238 --> 01:06:17,739
And, please,

1086
01:06:17,741 --> 01:06:20,408
have mercy on the soul
of Kipper Jones.

1087
01:06:20,410 --> 01:06:24,746
I know that Matthew 20:13 says

1088
01:06:24,748 --> 01:06:27,582
that he who kills a nun
shall know no forgiveness,

1089
01:06:27,584 --> 01:06:30,251
but instead will burn
in a fiery pit.

1090
01:06:30,253 --> 01:06:32,253
But please, please,

1091
01:06:32,255 --> 01:06:34,589
make an exception
in Kipper's case,

1092
01:06:34,591 --> 01:06:36,658
for he knows not
what he does.

1093
01:06:36,660 --> 01:06:41,730
- Did you hear that? Hey!
- Do you mind? I'm praying.

1094
01:06:41,732 --> 01:06:44,132
Well, that's not
in the 'effing Bible.

1095
01:06:44,134 --> 01:06:45,767
Sure it is.

1096
01:06:45,769 --> 01:06:48,503
You think there's no scripture
covering nun killers?

1097
01:06:52,776 --> 01:06:55,276
And please, Lord,

1098
01:06:55,278 --> 01:06:58,279
have mercy on Kipper's soul.

1099
01:06:58,281 --> 01:07:03,451
I know that according to
your holy word in John 3:4,

1100
01:07:03,453 --> 01:07:07,155
you say that the eyes
will be plucked out of the head

1101
01:07:07,157 --> 01:07:10,158
of anyone who slays a nun

1102
01:07:10,160 --> 01:07:12,227
or the protector of a nun.

1103
01:07:12,229 --> 01:07:14,763
The protector of the nun?
It does not say that.

1104
01:07:14,765 --> 01:07:17,799
Show me. Show me where it
says that in the Bible.

1105
01:07:17,801 --> 01:07:20,535
Show me in the passages
where those words are used.

1106
01:07:20,537 --> 01:07:22,203
We don't have a Bible.

1107
01:07:22,205 --> 01:07:23,638
But we're in
a bloody church, mate!

1108
01:07:23,640 --> 01:07:25,473
Good point. Good point.
Good point.

1109
01:07:25,475 --> 01:07:29,811
You, get over there.
Show me.

1110
01:07:29,813 --> 01:07:32,313
Show me in that Bible.

1111
01:07:32,315 --> 01:07:33,815
The holy Bible.

1112
01:07:33,817 --> 01:07:35,183
Holy fuck.

1113
01:07:35,185 --> 01:07:36,451
Move.

1114
01:07:36,453 --> 01:07:40,088
Show me Matthew, John...

1115
01:07:41,825 --> 01:07:45,260
Show me where it says
those words, huh?

1116
01:07:49,833 --> 01:07:51,399
This Bible's in Latin.

1117
01:07:52,669 --> 01:07:54,669
But that's what it means.

1118
01:07:54,671 --> 01:07:57,105
I'm coming. I'm coming.

1119
01:08:02,679 --> 01:08:09,517
<i>"Nonne ex denario
convenisti mecum."</i>

1120
01:08:09,519 --> 01:08:12,420
<i>"Nonne"</i> means "nun."

1121
01:08:12,422 --> 01:08:16,357
<i>"Ex denario"</i> means...

1122
01:08:16,359 --> 01:08:18,526
<i>"Convenisti mecum."</i>

1123
01:08:18,528 --> 01:08:20,762
"The convent's down a nun."

1124
01:08:20,764 --> 01:08:22,530
<i>"Non facio tibi."</i>

1125
01:08:22,532 --> 01:08:26,201
"The faceless man
who does this evil act."

1126
01:08:28,238 --> 01:08:29,404
If you're lying to me--

1127
01:08:29,406 --> 01:08:34,876
if you are lying to me...

1128
01:08:34,878 --> 01:08:37,712
Why are they still here,
Kipper?

1129
01:08:37,714 --> 01:08:40,615
How long can this
possibly take?

1130
01:08:43,720 --> 01:08:45,887
Get out, get out! Huh?

1131
01:08:45,889 --> 01:08:48,556
Okay, okay.

1132
01:08:48,558 --> 01:08:50,258
- Stay there!
- Okay.

1133
01:08:50,260 --> 01:08:53,461
Huh? Hey!

1134
01:08:55,765 --> 01:08:56,831
You...

1135
01:09:06,576 --> 01:09:08,676
I was gonna do it, but I couldn't do it.
I'm sorry, Dec.

1136
01:09:30,300 --> 01:09:34,435
- She's a nun.
- Yeah?

1137
01:09:34,437 --> 01:09:36,671
Well, I'm a Methodist.

1138
01:09:41,411 --> 01:09:42,577
Statton!

1139
01:09:52,789 --> 01:09:54,222
I'm sorry, Dec.

1140
01:09:54,224 --> 01:09:58,326
I couldn't let you do it.

1141
01:09:58,328 --> 01:09:59,861
They're innocent.
I couldn't.

1142
01:10:08,972 --> 01:10:10,705
Oh! Kipper!

1143
01:10:10,707 --> 01:10:13,808
Oh, Kipper! Kipper.

1144
01:10:13,810 --> 01:10:16,411
I couldn't let him do it.
I couldn't.

1145
01:10:16,413 --> 01:10:18,613
I couldn't let him do it.
It isn't right.

1146
01:10:21,484 --> 01:10:23,685
What in the name of Saint Tropez
is going on in here?

1147
01:10:23,687 --> 01:10:25,520
Mother Superior,
call an ambulance!

1148
01:10:25,522 --> 01:10:27,855
Call the police,
Father Donald.

1149
01:10:27,857 --> 01:10:29,691
Call the ambulance.
Call the police.

1150
01:10:29,693 --> 01:10:31,693
Come here.

1151
01:10:31,695 --> 01:10:34,896
Oh.

1152
01:10:35,999 --> 01:10:42,003
Will you pray for me, Mary?

1153
01:10:42,005 --> 01:10:43,271
Will you pray for me?

1154
01:10:45,675 --> 01:10:47,809
You're gonna
be fine, Pirate King.

1155
01:10:47,811 --> 01:10:49,744
Just hold on.

1156
01:11:10,533 --> 01:11:12,867
Mary, don't go.
I've got your pendant.

1157
01:11:12,869 --> 01:11:15,870
It doesn't matter anyway.
Forget it.

1158
01:11:15,872 --> 01:11:18,773
- Of course it does.
- It doesn't. Look...

1159
01:11:21,411 --> 01:11:24,879
...when I was 18,
I stowed away on a ship.

1160
01:11:24,881 --> 01:11:28,549
Stowed away?
What year was this, 1872?

1161
01:11:28,551 --> 01:11:30,718
A cargo ship,

1162
01:11:30,720 --> 01:11:35,056
to get here, because...

1163
01:11:35,058 --> 01:11:37,425
this is where she lived.

1164
01:11:37,427 --> 01:11:39,560
Your birth mother.

1165
01:11:39,562 --> 01:11:44,632
And I thought she would be
so excited to meet me.

1166
01:11:47,070 --> 01:11:52,907
Well, she refused to see me.

1167
01:11:52,909 --> 01:11:55,576
Left me standing
at the front door.

1168
01:11:55,578 --> 01:11:59,514
She basically
abandoned me again.

1169
01:12:02,452 --> 01:12:03,818
Why are you back here?

1170
01:12:08,458 --> 01:12:09,657
Really, why?

1171
01:12:15,098 --> 01:12:16,998
She's dying, Statton.

1172
01:12:20,770 --> 01:12:23,938
Her husband wrote me,
told me he'd get me in,

1173
01:12:23,940 --> 01:12:25,106
that she should see me.

1174
01:12:25,108 --> 01:12:27,575
"Should."
Should! Not "wants to."

1175
01:12:27,577 --> 01:12:30,878
Things are different
when people are dying.

1176
01:12:30,880 --> 01:12:33,948
Look, I don't even think
he told her I was coming.

1177
01:12:33,950 --> 01:12:35,616
She probably would have
just rejected me

1178
01:12:35,618 --> 01:12:37,385
and then died
right in front of me.

1179
01:12:37,387 --> 01:12:40,388
Ah, she--
she might no reject you.

1180
01:12:40,390 --> 01:12:42,490
Yes. Yes.

1181
01:12:42,492 --> 01:12:44,492
And that's the comfort
I can live with

1182
01:12:44,494 --> 01:12:45,960
for the rest of my life.

1183
01:12:45,962 --> 01:12:49,964
I can live with uncertainty.
It's my specialty.

1184
01:12:49,966 --> 01:12:53,634
What I can't live with is
a second round of rejection.

1185
01:12:53,636 --> 01:12:56,504
I just can't.
And why should I?

1186
01:12:56,506 --> 01:12:59,874
Why should I let her make me
feel like shit on her deathbed?

1187
01:13:01,978 --> 01:13:03,878
Well, it might not
feel like that.

1188
01:13:06,149 --> 01:13:09,984
It might feel like...

1189
01:13:09,986 --> 01:13:11,652
home.

1190
01:13:11,654 --> 01:13:14,422
How do you know?

1191
01:13:17,660 --> 01:13:23,531
Well, you know
adventure, Mary.

1192
01:13:23,533 --> 01:13:26,901
Home is my forte.

1193
01:13:57,133 --> 01:13:58,699
Gosh.

1194
01:13:58,701 --> 01:14:01,569
- I'm--
- You're her...

1195
01:14:01,571 --> 01:14:03,538
when I first met her.

1196
01:14:05,742 --> 01:14:08,576
You can see her now.

1197
01:14:08,578 --> 01:14:10,044
She's very ill.

1198
01:14:10,046 --> 01:14:13,047
She'll only be able
to manage a short time.

1199
01:14:23,193 --> 01:14:24,725
Hello.

1200
01:14:28,031 --> 01:14:30,097
Oh, my gosh.

1201
01:14:35,071 --> 01:14:37,205
I'm sorry,
I'm not very good at Welsh.

1202
01:14:39,542 --> 01:14:41,909
I don't think
she knows who we are.

1203
01:14:41,911 --> 01:14:43,244
She doesn't know
who anyone is.

1204
01:14:43,246 --> 01:14:45,746
She's got dementia.

1205
01:14:45,748 --> 01:14:47,748
Then why did you invite me

1206
01:14:47,750 --> 01:14:49,884
if she doesn't know
who anyone is?

1207
01:14:49,886 --> 01:14:52,253
I worried you wouldn't come.

1208
01:14:52,255 --> 01:14:55,089
She can remember the past.

1209
01:14:55,091 --> 01:14:58,259
She gets distressed at times.

1210
01:14:58,261 --> 01:15:01,128
Please, I think
you might help her.

1211
01:15:22,218 --> 01:15:23,784
You came.

1212
01:15:29,292 --> 01:15:30,791
I came.

1213
01:15:30,793 --> 01:15:34,128
David said
I need to give you advice

1214
01:15:34,130 --> 01:15:36,664
for your honeymoon.

1215
01:15:36,666 --> 01:15:38,132
The only thing
I can say is this,

1216
01:15:38,134 --> 01:15:42,136
the best marriages
are those between

1217
01:15:42,138 --> 01:15:45,139
an ocean
and a lighthouse.

1218
01:15:45,141 --> 01:15:49,677
Two lighthouses are boring.

1219
01:15:49,679 --> 01:15:52,680
Two oceans crash about.

1220
01:15:52,682 --> 01:15:57,318
But a lighthouse
and an ocean

1221
01:15:57,320 --> 01:15:59,186
will last forever.

1222
01:16:00,757 --> 01:16:03,090
Take turns!

1223
01:16:04,761 --> 01:16:07,929
Let him be the ocean
sometimes, darling.

1224
01:16:07,931 --> 01:16:11,832
Turn your lights on
so he can find you.

1225
01:16:11,834 --> 01:16:14,602
You don't have to be
the ocean all the time.

1226
01:16:19,342 --> 01:16:21,242
No, no, no, don't take her!
Bring her back.

1227
01:16:21,244 --> 01:16:23,344
It's just
a hot water bottle, Aurelie.

1228
01:16:23,346 --> 01:16:24,779
They've taken her!
Bring her back!

1229
01:16:24,781 --> 01:16:28,015
- She's mine!
- No, I'm her.

1230
01:16:28,017 --> 01:16:29,350
Aurelie, I'm her.

1231
01:16:29,352 --> 01:16:30,952
Make them bring her back,
sister.

1232
01:16:30,954 --> 01:16:34,889
I'm here. It's me.

1233
01:16:34,891 --> 01:16:37,625
I'm her.

1234
01:16:45,368 --> 01:16:47,101
Say my name.

1235
01:16:51,207 --> 01:16:52,273
Mother.

1236
01:16:55,044 --> 01:16:56,110
Yes.

1237
01:17:03,753 --> 01:17:05,052
You're Charlotte.

1238
01:17:07,890 --> 01:17:09,657
I'm Charlotte.

1239
01:17:25,074 --> 01:17:26,307
Come with me.

1240
01:17:28,244 --> 01:17:30,911
I can't miss my court date.

1241
01:17:34,083 --> 01:17:35,416
I'll definitely keep
in touch, though, eh?

1242
01:17:35,418 --> 01:17:37,151
Hmm.

1243
01:17:41,791 --> 01:17:43,924
- Take this.
- Oh.

1244
01:17:43,926 --> 01:17:46,661
- For your legal expenses.
- No.

1245
01:17:46,663 --> 01:17:51,432
Go put a deposit
on a flat or something.

1246
01:17:51,434 --> 01:17:54,769
If you promise to go
to the mainland one day.

1247
01:17:55,938 --> 01:17:57,705
One day.

1248
01:19:13,349 --> 01:19:15,182
Excuse me, excuse me!

1249
01:19:15,184 --> 01:19:16,283
Mary!

1250
01:19:16,285 --> 01:19:17,418
Mary!

1251
01:19:19,188 --> 01:19:20,287
Mary.

1252
01:19:29,365 --> 01:19:30,931
You know you're early, right?

1253
01:19:30,933 --> 01:19:33,200
- What?
- You're supposed to come

1254
01:19:33,202 --> 01:19:34,535
when I'm on the ferry.

1255
01:19:34,537 --> 01:19:36,070
Yell, "Stop the boat!"

1256
01:19:36,072 --> 01:19:40,207
Well, you know me,
I'm punctual.

1257
01:19:42,211 --> 01:19:43,911
You know you can't really

1258
01:19:43,913 --> 01:19:46,213
jump in front
of a bullet, right?

1259
01:19:46,215 --> 01:19:48,516
It was instinct.

1260
01:19:48,518 --> 01:19:51,218
Huh.

1261
01:19:51,220 --> 01:19:53,120
You are an ocean after all.

1262
01:19:59,562 --> 01:20:01,362
Statton.

1263
01:20:06,569 --> 01:20:08,002
Statton.

1264
01:20:13,075 --> 01:20:14,408
Say my name.

1265
01:20:14,410 --> 01:20:16,577
Oh, uh...

1266
01:20:16,579 --> 01:20:20,247
Anne-Marie, Mary, Carol,

1267
01:20:20,249 --> 01:20:22,249
Sister Mary Catherine,

1268
01:20:22,251 --> 01:20:24,585
not Yvonne, Diamond Lil',

1269
01:20:24,587 --> 01:20:26,587
Our Lady of the Night,

1270
01:20:26,589 --> 01:20:29,423
Bollocks McGiven...

1271
01:20:29,425 --> 01:20:31,025
Charlotte.

1272
01:20:32,428 --> 01:20:34,028
Just call me baby.

1273
01:20:37,967 --> 01:20:39,934
<i>Wait, are you wearing</i>

1274
01:20:39,936 --> 01:20:42,603
<i>your ex-wife's
boyfriend's underwear?</i>

1275
01:20:42,605 --> 01:20:44,438
<i>Not today.</i>

1276
01:20:44,440 --> 01:20:46,440
<i>Well,
there's a label sewn inside</i>

1277
01:20:46,442 --> 01:20:48,275
<i>that says "Dan Marks."</i>

1278
01:20:48,277 --> 01:20:49,610
<i>Oh, yeah.</i>

1279
01:20:49,612 --> 01:20:51,612
<i>Ah, I forgot to tell you.</i>

1280
01:20:51,614 --> 01:20:53,848
<i>Statton's not my real name.</i>

1281
01:20:56,419 --> 01:20:57,885
<i>You're kidding, righ?</i>

1282
01:20:57,887 --> 01:20:58,886
<i>Am?</i>