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- >Be the owner of Lavandar the fluffy pony
- >He's a bit of a snark, and you're a ditz, but you make it work
- >Taught him how to use the computer and Chrome
- >He's a lot more capable than the other fluffies, especially for a foal, so he takes to Internet really quickly
- >Walk in on him with his head in his little hooves
- "You okay buddy?"
- >He turns, face ashen
- >Notice he's on Fluffy Pony General
- "Wook at dis"
- >You examine the shitposting
- "Dese fagets neva' gonna hewp fwuffy wepudashun ef dey gonna shitpos' wike dis"
- >He points to a particular post
- "'Quadwupah Censorin''? Weawwy? Is dis wha' fwuffy pony haf descended to?"
- >He gets out of the chair and walks off
- "I mean, come on, it's not THAT bad"
- >He keeps walking
- "Where you going?"
- "Wook I need... I need some time awone in da gwass fo' contempwatin'"
- "Should I bring you your soda in a little bit?"
- "Pwease do, hooman"
- >Walk into the kitchen
- >Fainly hear him again
- "Faking newfags aww ova da pwace nowadays..."
- --
- >Be the owner of Lavandar the fluffy pony
- >He's a snark, you're a ditz, it works
- >You and him have just concocted the best allegory for making fun of the newfags on Fluffy Pony General
- >Get awarded a couple of internets
- >Arrive at the annual Internet Award Ceremony
- >See a number of /b/tards, Ken Levine, and that-guy-who-made-an-IWTCIRBD-statue-and-actually-came-on-it
- >The ceremony goes on
- >Lavandar is engrossed in the amazing things done by the other internet-receivers
- >Your names are called
- >Before you can stand, Lavandar is already at the front podium, giving a speech, sitting in some buxom trophy girl's overly-generous cleavage
- "...also wike to thank Mawcus, and Nay-sir-siss, or Nay-siss-sir.... da guy wif da eviw pony. Tank yoo steak nummies fo' not bein' sketties. And..."
- >You scramble to get to the god-damned podium before the fucking pony forgets to give you some of the spotlight
- >In addition to being a ditz, you have traits of an attentionwhore
- >He looks at you, and smirks
- "And tank yoo fwufflepuff fo' keepin' fwuffies in da mainstweam; GUD NIGH' EVEWY BODY!"
- >He turns and shoves his face in that delicious boobage
- >The attached woman giggles and walks backstage cuddling the little fuck
- >Get given a much smaller Internet Award compared to Lavandar's
- >Fucking fluffy ponies
- --
- >Be the owner of Lavandar the fluffy pony
- >He's a snark, you're a ditz, it works
- >Have just set your Internets on the fireplace mantle
- >His is bigger than yours
- "Yeah, in mowe way dan one!"
- >You glare at the little foal
- >His white mane and purple coat-fluff bounce as he giggles and breaks a few narrative walls
- >Retire to your game room
- >Fire-up the ol' 360
- >Pop in MK9
- >Ben's coming later this week for some Tag Ladder and Story Mode
- >Lavandar walks in and plops down on your couch, watching the fighting
- >Get bored with the numbing violence after a while
- >Go out for a run
- >Got a Bronycon to look good for in a few months
- >Come home, hearing noises from the game room
- "Lavandar?"
- "Pwayin' Mowtaw Kombah"
- >He doesn't even have any fingers
- "You don't even have any fingers!"
- "Dat dint botha pwetty hooman fwom Intahneh Awards"
- >It's on
- >Shower and change
- >Start up a Versus match
- "Wow, Scowpion? What a scwub choice"
- >He picks fucking Ermac
- >Starts beating your ass with all that psychic soul shit
- >Green mist everywhere
- >Can't even get a spear out
- >Lose in record time
- >He jumps off couch and walks towards the door
- "Haven' seen poopies dat big since time yoo made dose taquidos"
- >He turns his head arond
- "...Wavandar know hooman stewin' in juices because yoo bad ah sub-pah fightin' game, buh can hooman pwease make dose taquidos?"
- >Sigh
- "Want hotsauce with that?"
- "Is yo' noses funawal hooman"
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