[Unfinished] Keeta's Guide to Girls

keeta's tips on how to talk to girls

yo what up guys im keeta, shout outs to my boys indextic, flatballer, and everyone except Greg. But not Zanaro, fuck that guy. today im gonna teach yall how to talk to girls.

ok, suppose you suck at telling stories, and your name is BlitzBlatt. you're pretty much fucked, give up.

assuming you're not blitzblatt, get your notepads out. and your dick in. dont talk to girls with that shit swingin in the breeze

a good place to meet girls is the food court. they just sit down at the mall and eat shit like theyre just waiting for you to come and sit next to them. make sure youre not alone, cuz then someone might say "forever alone XD" and what the fuck can you do then? nothing cuz nobody's there to back you up. so bring your friend or friends. but make sure they are beta as fuck. you have to be the cool guy. luckily for you everyone reading this likely has beta friends. also be sure to use references from zsr 2009, such as "pooped on", all hipster females will be turned on. hahaha jk, what are you, GAY? dont mention internet shit when talking to girls, dipshit.

anyway, dont just sit down next to them either, what are you, a creeper? you probably are, but dont act like it. get some shit at the mall too so they dont figure out that youre only there to get your D stiff. casually introduce yourself. jk, let your beta faggot friend introduce himself first. he will make an awkward fool of himself and you can just swoop in and pick up the pieces. in your mind you can think to your friend "forever alone XD" he will pick up on your telepathy and be like damn, what can he do now. so then he gives up trying to take any girls. more opportunity for you.