Hawksrei Masterpost

● 18+ only or I'll feed you to the Nomu. Short and sweet: All I want is for Hawks to smooch every (legal) member of the Todoroki clan. Endeavor? Yep. Dabi? Hell yeah. Natsuo? You betcha! Fuyumi? Totally! Rei? Get outta town, of course! Whether this is some type of AU where family tensions aren't quite so high or you're looking for some of that sweet, sweet interpersonal conflict that goes along with an outsider sticking his nose into some pretty complicated business, Hawks is the fly guy who's got the cure for whatever ails ya! Connect if you're interested and let's give this featherbrain some hot thrills and cool chills.
2019-04-05 07:08:29
🌀 Hey there! This is an excellent idea. Hawks deserves all the smooches he can get. If you're still looking for one, I would love to play a Rei for you!
2019-04-05 07:10:03
● (( Absolutely, welcome aboard! Right off the bat, I think Rei and Hawks would have an excellent dynamic just because his personality is so different from Enji's; I think it'd be a wonderful change of pace! Maybe he pays her visits every once in a while in the hospital and they grow even closer once she's finally discharged? ))
2019-04-05 07:33:13
🌀 I like that! Hawks visits to check out Endeavor's ~ mysterious unknown wife ~ or what have you, and finds... this sweet woman ??? How did she get married to Enji in the first place ???

Rei is absolutely thrilled to have a new visitor and invites him to visit whenever he can, especially after she gets out of the hospital. I'm thinking she learns about Endeavor and Hawks' partnership at some point, whether by Hawks or family, and gets a little concerned for Hawks. Is he doing okay? Is his work dangerous? Is he staying safe? Is Enji being an ass? It's very good, very pure, very organic. She adores this funky bird.
2019-04-05 18:14:12
● (( I think he respects the hell out of Rei for what she's gone through (if she trusts him enough to share it, since Enji's not exactly the most forthright about his family issues.) I imagine he'd struggle a lot with his growing baby crush and tries to brush it off as just simple admiration and wanting to be a good friend of the family he's held up on a pedestal. But there's also the potential for that sweet, sweet angst of "Am I just using this sweetheart as a replacement for her bastard husband?" and I'm :')

Despite the easygoing exterior he uses to give off the impression of being a Chill Dude with No Worries, I think Hawks struggles A Lot with his first instincts being to manipulate a situation to his advantage because he's had to do that ever since growing up and definitely since becoming a double-agent. So he's got this constant running commentary in the back of his head, "Was that okay? Should I have said that? Am I just tricking someone into thinking that about me?" Hawks is somebody who's Very Principled and hates the idea of deceiving people even when he's willing to do what he has to. He's scared that one day it'll become too easy. That he'll start to enjoy it. That he'll become someone he doesn't recognize.

I'm sorry for being like this, the angst is in my veins and I can't get it out. ))
2019-04-05 19:53:05
🌀 I already love your portrayal of Hawks. The nuance? The angst? Tasty. Don't apologize.

Going off of That Angst, these two are probably going to have a lot of conflict surrounding communication. Hawks has his issues with potential manipulation, and Rei is still very much recovering from an abusive relationship. Neither of them want to say the wrong thing, but at the same time, I think they would both want to (eventually)? Open up? To this nice person that waltzed into their life?? A foreign concept maybe??? Yet, their idea of / experiences with communication are pretty fucked! Fun!

'Baby crush' I'm crying he's precious. Honestly, Rei will probably tend towards the same thing. Little baby crush, brushes it off because Hawks is just a person that sparks joy in general. Definitely not because she's attracted to him. Healthy relationship who?
2019-04-05 22:28:29
● (( God fucking bless, I think what's really neat about this dynamic is that they're both, like. Damaged people that are inextricably attached to the person who kinda fucked them over, Rei obviously far more so than Hawks, and I think that once The Rumor Come Out: Does Endeavor Is Shithead? It'd be a real turning point in how Hawks has come to think of his working relationship with a respected colleague, and what he owes to the people in his family. Even though it's clearly not anything to do with him, he feels responsible for having idolized a man who could do this to his own wife and children, and I think that's motivation for him to want to step up and make an active effort to be part of their lives. Make up for the harm Enji's inflicted with some good of his own while grappling with that complex mix of disgust and hope that maybe they can still get out of this relatively unscathed.

I dunno about you, but I've got some Big Feelings about Endeavor and not all of them are positive; he's definitely not a good person, but he's a fascinating character, and while I find comfort in the notion that even the worst people are capable of making a decision to step back and do better, it's also not the responsibility of anyone they've hurt to forgive or accept them even if they've changed, you know? So Hawks is trying to reconcile the image of the hero he's grown up chasing after with the reality of who he is and what he's done. He looks at Rei and wonders how anybody could have the stomach to mistreat her, and then his thoughts start drifting to how he'd do better if he were ever that lucky, and then whoa whoa whoa, pump the brakes, nothing to see here, he is not gonna become Mr. Steal Yo Girl. (Instead he becomes Mr. Cherish Yo Wife And Make Her Feel Adored And Appreciated Before I Do It For You.) ))
2019-04-05 22:45:01
🌀 "Cherish Yo Wife And Make Her Feel Adored And Appreciated Before I Do It For You"
Narrator: And then he did.

I have? the same Big Feelings about Endeavor. He is an extremely complex character. While his past actions are inexcusable, it's worth noting that he's trying(?) to be a better person. And, it's up to his family whether or not they want to forgive him. I think the way Horikoshi has written the conflict so far is? interesting and suitably complex for how Messy the situation is. Fuyumi is already gung ho with Operation: Get This Broken Family Back Together, Shouto and Natsuo are the exact opposite, and we don't know what is going on with Rei because Horikoshi hates giving the BNHA women screentime. (It's ok. I'm not bitter.) Anyway! Fuck everyone else I respect you. Thank you for the good analysis.

While the concept is cute on a surface level, Hawks trying to 'make up' for Enji's wrongdoings (and his own hero worship of Endeavor) is.. oof. He has no logical reason to be doing this. His idolization of Enji didn't cause Enji to be a dick. Hawks is doing his best to be a decent guy but? The whole thing sounds like it's rooted in guilt. If Rei picks up on that, and she thinks that Hawks is only being kind to her out of pity, it's going to hurt. Very fun. I love their dynamic. :)
2019-04-05 23:19:09
● (( YESSSS, GOD, THANK YOU FOR PICKING UP WHAT I'M PUTTING DOWN. Healthy relationship WHO? That is exactly the kind of vibe I'm going for, where it isn't all sunshine and rainbows even for a pair that's ostensibly very well-intentioned and only wants the best for each other, Hawks is by no means perfect and he's not immune to approaching things from the wrong angle or doing the right things for the wrong reasons. It's something they're going to have to work past, particularly because I get the sense that Rei is much more empathetic and attuned to the underlying reasons of why people do things. (Speaking from experience, it's a defense mechanism, always trying to pick apart the intentions behind every action and assume the worst even if it's supposed to be an act of kindness.)

They've both got to do some reexamination of what it is they want out of each other and how they plan to get it, even if it's just good company and the chance to laugh for the first time in years. I think it's after the hurt of Rei wondering if Hawks is only there because he feels sorry for her and not because he finds her genuinely radiant that The Feelings slip out in the heat of the moment. There's no way for him to truly convey everything he wants without spilling his guts, and tensions are high and he has a bad habit of rambling regardless, so it just comes out in this desperate admission that he feels more for her than he has any right to and he doesn't know what to do about it because she deserves more than someone who's just going to turn around and hurt her again, the way he clearly already has. ))
2019-04-05 23:41:02
● (( Before I forget: Since Hawks lacks a canon civilian name for the moment, I've settled on Naoki Hinataka (nicknamed Nao by the people he's close to, natch), so I'd love it if they got to the point of calling one another by their first names since few people know his to begin with! I think it'd make for a nice step up in that good good trust factor. ))
2019-04-06 05:59:56
🌀 NAO,,.,,., I LOVE HIM... God PLEASE let them be on a first name basis. Let them be familiar and easy with each other. Let them rest...

The name thing reminds me, Rei is 100% going to be separated from Enji at some point (since they're basically separated already in every way except legally.. like c'mon... let her go...............) and pick up her maiden name instead of Todoroki. Not super relevant, just something to look forward to.


This whole thing is? Delicious. Revolutionary. Show stopping. Despite their good intentions, their relationship is poisoned from the beginning, and they will have to put a serious amount of effort in to keep this ship from capsizing. Rei is in a near-constant state of walking on eggshells. Like you said, the empathy is a huge factor in determining how she acts. She fears upsetting people not only because she wants her friends/family/acquaintances to be the happiest they can be, but also because she /does not want to get hurt./ Rei's analytical skills? Unfortunately top notch. Every interaction, the gears are turning in her head. Her whole life is essentially performing cost/benefit analyses, weighing the options, doing calculations so she can keep situations from spiraling out of the control. She is extremely warm and personable on the surface, but underneath, she's rather clinical about things? It's going to take a Bit for her to be able to relax around Hawks, especially if she can tell he isn't being forthcoming about his motives. The desire to avoid conflict and confrontation is overwhelming for her. And that's just on Rei's end??? Nao is a whole 'nother mess entirely????? I feel like they're going to have a difficult time connecting on a deeper level until they feel like they can be Open with each other.

Naoki: Hey you deserve better than me I've hurt you too much etc. etc.
Rei (who has been doubting her self worth and has been thinking the same exact thing about Hawks): Haha what? :)

Crying in the club rn... Rambly Hawks calms my soul.... But he also hurts my soul because he deserves everything. Rei also thinks that Hawks deserves better than her? Checkmate? He is a good hero who (she's assuming) actually cares about his job – not just the pursuit of fame or power. She believes that he can do better than a woman who has been sitting in a mental hospital for the past decade. He can do better than a person who has hurt her own family and brought them shame. He most certainly deserves a person who can bring him as much joy as he gives. And then he breaks out the Confession, and Rei isn't so sure what she thinks anymore. Probably that she's selfish for wanting to be with him when he can do better? Lovely!

I'm going to stop typing now because this is a lot of rambling. Feeling the Hawks Spirit tonight! But please know that I Appreciate you and the thought you're putting into this. I love this pairing to pieces already.
2019-04-06 20:27:01
● (( I can't believe I'm ride or die for an honest-to-god crackship and IT'S GOOD. AND I LOVE IT. AND I'M CRYING. ))
2019-04-06 20:37:10
● (( I feel like we're never going to get out of the OOC planning phase if I don't stop gushing about JUST HOW FUCKING GOOD these two are because they're honestly very similar when you get down to it, both of them having far more going on underneath their charming and personable exteriors and I'm just. Holy fuck I'm in love. So just to make sure that we have a prayer of actually writing the dang thing sometime this century (I'm having so much fun, you don't even know), since we've got some idea of where we're going and the stakes it takes to get there, let's talk starting points. Do you want to go for their very first meeting, Hawks bringing flowers for a courtesy meeting with his colleague's wife, or more established to the point where they're comfortable talking with one another already?

We've talked a bunch about their emotional dynamic and motivations, but are there any other headcanons for Rei that you wanna share? Details of how she grew up before [gestures to Endeavor] or hobbies that help keep her occupied while she's in the hospital, that kinda thing? It's going to take a good deal of work before they're anywhere near this point, but just so I kind of know what we're eventually headed toward, do you want to keep this SFW and if not, can I confirm your age? Do you have any length preferences for posts, ideally with a concrete range that you're comfortable with so I can make sure I don't over- or undershoot? If you've got any questions for me, I'm totally all ears! ))
2019-04-06 20:48:44
● (( Hawks: Nice to meetcha, Mrs. Todoroki!
Rei: Call me Rei.
Hawks: ... Ms. Todoroki.
Rei: Rei.
Hawks: ................ Ms. Rei?
Rei:
Hawks:
Rei:
Hawks: Rei.
Rei: You got it!!
Hawks: Okay but then you gotta call me Naoki.
Rei: Nao.
Hawks: [BLUSH] ))
2019-04-06 21:01:16
● (( Nao drops the bomb that he, like, loves her and junk and that's pretty dope and Rei points out that she's got a daughter his age and he's all, "Hey, no, listen, it's cool, I was voted Most Likely To Be A Sugar Baby in high school, I'm just fulfilling the prophecy and there's nobody else I'd rather do it with." ))
2019-04-06 21:07:16
🌀 Okay yeah let's put a cork in this bottle and Chat! Honestly I'd go on forever too if given a chance.... I love these two to death.......

I'm thinking a second or later meeting would be easier to start with? We can get past the initial awkwardness and get straight to the regular awkwardness. If anything important could have happened in their first meeting, we could talk it out ooc or revisit it later? But, for the sake of getting the ball rolling on the sweet shit, a pre-established relationship sounds like it would work the best. I'm open to starting from the beginning if you would rather, though!

For reference, I'm 19! No children here, no worries. I'm open to this becoming NSFW eventually, but it's personally not a priority for me? Relationship and character building are my kinks. For post length, I'm flexible! I prefer keeping things around the 3-5 paragraph range?? If that's a concrete enough estimate??? I can definitely write more, but if our replies are around the size of something like my last post, I cannot guarantee I'll be replying consistently. Got classes and all that to keep up with.

Going to take a hot second to think of any questions and jot down my headcanons! Just want to say, I mentioned this ship to my gf, she hit me with:

"Rei voice: ur young enough to be my kid.
Rei voice: actually that would piss him off so much wanna go to dinner"

and not 5 minutes later you slammed down that sugar baby comment and we're both McFucking dying thank you so much.
2019-04-06 21:23:11
● (( GOD FUCKING BLESS. Listen, I'm not saying that Hawks has a habit of being attracted to people older than him but I AM saying this is not his first time at the rodeo. ))
2019-04-06 21:31:23
● (( It's just his first time actually caring so much about somebody he very much doesn't Want to Want to like. ))
2019-04-06 21:32:27
🌀 Not a question but I'd love to hear about your headcanons for Hawks as well! Your understanding of him is *kisses fingers,* would love to hear what other Flavor you got going for him.

Also! Was going to mention this before, but if I ever write/say/do something that is uncomfortable for you, please let me know and I'll cut that shit out! And, if you have any triggers that might come up and you're comfortable with sharing them, don't be afraid to give me a heads up! I will say, I am (and already have) mentioned that Rei has experienced abuse as in canon, but I won't be going into graphic detail about that. Nothing more than mentions.

Okay! Real quick rundown of Rei's Not So Fantastic Life. She grew up in a traditional home, and due to the versatile nature of her quirk, was expected to marry into another impressive quirk line. Arranged quirk marriage, babey. She's lived with that expectation for her whole life. Not healthy, not kosher. On the plus side, she's a master at flower arrangements because that is obviously a desirable trait to have? Probably doesn't outweigh the mental strain she went through, though. Probably.

As you'd expect, her family arranged a partnership with Enji's, and the two were married as soon as they were able. It wasn't romantic in the least, but initially, it was relatively amicable. It was like a business relationship, in a way. But, you know, an extremely sketchy relationship that was outside of Rei's control. From there, it's basically --> the years go on --> have a kid --> watch Enji's obsession with power/All Might grow --> more years --> more kids --> more aggression/abuse --> lose a son --> harm another son --> hospital time. In present day, she's had loads of physical and mental therapy. Her habits and defense mechanisms are still in place, but she is functioning and extremely happy away from Endeavor, especially now that she can see her children on a more regular basis.

Other various headcanons!

Her quirk and Shouto's quirks are similar, given that Shouto's is derived from hers and Enji's. She can produce ice at will, though it requires a basis or foundation. The limiting factor is, the summoning of ice is dependent on the moisture in the air, environment, or her body. Given that she isn't a hero, her quirk usage is limited and poorly developed, like most other civilians. She can create small, fine structures for funsies, and is resistant to low temperatures.

She possesses some nerve damage in her hands from overusing her quirk at one point. Too cold, the nerves go. Rei has minor difficulties with fine motor skills as a result, and also has perpetually shaky hands. Doesn't stop her from writing, though. For hobbies, she has picked up letter writing to keep in contact with her family. Knitting is another one encouraged by her caretakers, so she can exercise her hands. Rei also tries to speak with other residents when she gets the chance. Given her empathetic nature, she's a good counselor and listener.

When she gets out of the hospital, she is 100% bankrolled by Endeavor to keep things hush-hush and she uses that freedom to the fullest. Catch her maxing out his credit cards. Want to go on a nice date, Hawks? She's got you.

2019-04-06 21:45:03
🌀 I'M HOWLING this is NOT his first time
2019-04-06 21:45:37
🌀 Rei: haha lol you care about me loser-
2019-04-06 21:46:01
● (( Yes, hello, me and Hawks are both going to file for a marriage license right now immediately I HAVE TO WIFE HER THIS IS A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH. ))
2019-04-06 21:47:49
🌀 Wife or death!
2019-04-06 21:49:36
● (( YOU SAID IT SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO! The thought was in my brain but it would've been Too Much. ))
2019-04-06 21:50:03
🌀 Wife or death is Never too much.
2019-04-06 21:51:08
● (( I should have asked about triggers beforehand and I'm kinda kicking myself because it's usually among the very first questions I ask!! Obviously, this is going to deal with some heavy subject matter so I'm comfortable with things getting dark as long as it doesn't involve anything between our characters, you know? The offer is always on the table for you, too, so please do make sure to let me know if I ever step out of line because your comfort? Important. Your boundaries? Respected. All my love from one writer of rarepairs to another? For you! In terms of stuff I'd like to avoid, ideally I'd like to skirt past depictions of sexual assault and suicide/self-harm, even though I know it often goes hand in hand with terribad marriages, but that's about everything for me! I have a strong stomach otherwise.

Hawks headcanons! You want 'em, I've got 'em. First off, I like the thought of Hawks having birds like a bone, hollow so they enable him to fly, and because of this, they're very fragile and break easily! He's a delicate lad, so he relies on his speed and reflexes to avoid getting caught by villains because if they get him in their grasp, he's a goner. I'm pretty sure he's made best friends with all the doctors in the area just because he's been spending so much time in and out of the hospital after getting slammed into buildings, haha. Actually really interesting to think about him encountering Natsuo, maybe during his internship, since his field is also going into medicine, so that's another point for him and Rei to bond over!

(Hawks: Hey so don't freak out but--
Natsuo: I'm already freaking out, but go on.
Hawks: So. Me and your mom, right.
Natsuo: Why was I cursed with this family. I'm a good person. I don't deserve this.)

Hawks is nomadic by nature; as the number 2 hero, he has to be all over Japan and he's one of the only heroes with the type of mobility that enables him to zip by over long distances and go where he has to in order to do his job at maximum efficiency! It means he never stays in one place for too long, so he doesn't really even have a permanent address. He stays in cheap motels where available, and spends months at a time renting out empty apartments in a lot of high-traffic areas at once just in case he needs to crash there. They're never particularly comfortable, but it's more for function than anything else, and he only uses it to sleep in when he absolutely has to. He's not one for being overly attached to places, but a big part of him wishes he'd be able to put down roots and have somewhere that's just his and isn't temporary. He wants a home to come back to and, as much as he claims otherwise, someone to share it with.

(Dabi, after a night of drinking, when Hawks spills his guts: Haha, gay.)

Nao grew up in some pretty dire straits; his family was consistently working long and hard hours just to make ends meet, and while his dad wanted to be a hero when he was younger, he had to put that dream aside in order to raise a family. It left him pretty bitter and he was always pushing Naoki to be the absolute best and to fulfill that dream for him, but even without that constant pressure, he just so happened to turn out a prodigy. He had little interest in the work from a young age, just going through the motions to keep his dad off his back, but when he hit 10, his father passed away unexpectedly, and suddenly he had to grapple with a whole lot of complex emotions.

Part of him resented having that burden pushed on him his whole life, another part felt guilty for not being the picture perfect son and how refusing to keep going would be disrespecting his dad's memory, and another part just felt. Lost. It was at that point that Endeavor was reaching new heights in his career, and Naoki found something about him that spoke to him, in part because it was somebody larger in life that he could aspire to and work toward, and in part because he made for the perfect replacement father figure. It helped him find the good in hero work and shape his identity into wanting to be That But Better. Taking what made Endeavor a rising star and apply it so that he reached more people, achieved new records, and did more good. It wasn't about the numbers for him but the influence, not the fame or prestige but the assurance he could provide to the masses.

This is getting to be a little much, so a few rapidfire baby headcanons: Despite being part bird, part man, all bastard, he's a cat person and falls in love with every stray he sees. He's extremely tactile and touchy-feely, particularly for someone born and raised in Japan where physical affection isn't a huge thing, so he Will find every excuse to touch Rei as long as she's comfortable with it, whether it's a hand squeeze in solidarity or little things like tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear or plucking a bit of fuzz from her blouse, anything goes. Since he doesn't sleep in the most comfortable of places ordinarily, he's gotten in the habit of taking short naps with his feathers wrapped around him individually like the world's fluffiest blanket, and the image of him falling asleep in the middle of one of his visits after too many all-nighters is. Precious Also: He did Japanese archery back in high school and he still loves watching kyudo tournaments to this day!

There's like a billion more that I'm not thinking of but I just wanna talk more about these two, I'm SO HYPED, and I hate it! ))
2019-04-06 22:39:13
🌀 No worries about the triggers! Sometimes you just get caught up in an obscure rare pair and lose sight of everything else in your life. It happens! For me, as long as there is no non-con or detailed descriptions of gore, which I seriously doubt are going to come up, I'm good! Other heavier topics are a-okay with me.

I'm in love with Hawks.. he is insanely precious..... Love that bird bastard......

Can I pitch you a concept? Rei gets an apartment after getting out of the hospital. Guess who's welcome to drop by whenever he wants. Does he need a place to home his Dozens of stray cats? He has one now.

Rei: [slapping the side of her apartment] get in, bitch.

Also these two need to make 'I had shitty parents and childhood trauma and all I got was this t-shirt' shirts together that's non-negotiable holy shit.
2019-04-06 22:52:20
● (( It's a law of the universe that, as a gay, all of my characters have to have daddy issues by requirement. That's just the way it be. I'm not saying that Hawks files to set up an agency in the same city so that he can be closer to his best girl, but I am saying that he comes over so often that half of his things are already moved in by the time they get around to saying, "Hey, maybe we should just make it official and live together." God, I'm getting emotional. Board by board, we're gonna build this house of HawksRei and it's gonna be BEAUTIFUL. ))
2019-04-06 22:58:19
🌀 Thank you for following the gay code. If your characters don't have parental issues then what is even the point gosh ://///.

FUCK that is cute. She has little spaces for him all around the apartment. That dresser? His. Half of the closet? His. That section of the bookshelf? You guessed it. Yet they're somehow dysfunctional enough to realize they're essentially in a committed relationship until?? Hawks gets a little nervous and lets shit fly? I'm c rying. We're doing god's work here.
2019-04-06 23:03:01
● (( I'M CRYING, can you just imagine, like. Rei's got a friend over and they're chatting and Hawks is in the background puttering away, making tea and handing it to both of them, airing out the laundry, always sneaking in a little pat or something whenever he passes, and it's always really ????? for the people around them because they don't want to assume but it's like. How else do you interpret that.

Shouto: ... So you two are pretty close, then, huh?
Hawks, sprawled out across Rei's lap showing her the screen from his Animal Crossing game: Huh what d'you mean this is perfectly normal friend stuff.

They're picking out furniture for the Cat Room (that's the room in the apartment where all the cats they accumulate hang out) and the clerk is making small-talk and it's like, "Oh, it's always exciting planning for a new member of the family!" (because they're idiots and kept it vague enough that their newest cat could be a baby) "How long have you two lovebirds been married?" AND IT JUST. EXPLODES. ))
2019-04-06 23:10:26
🌀 That post where someone is buying baby clothes for their opossum and the lady at the checkout keeps asking about their baby. That's them. That is all I have to say.
2019-04-06 23:13:32
🌀 Shouto: NoRmAl FrIeNd StUfF.
Rei and Nao: ???

Hey here's a question. Their friends and family are obviously suspicious and equally as baffled. But. Hey. Consider this: What does the media think about the #2 hero suddenly spending a metric assload of time with a new friend?

Hawks: It's not romantic. I don't know where you got that idea from.
[Time passes]
Hawks: Okay you guys might have been right bUT-
2019-04-06 23:16:18
● (( Hawks is very conscious of the media and makes it clear that whatever they're speculating, they keep it confined to him. "If I see a single camera near our house--" (and every single person in hero society caught that slipup; they're writing articles about eloping and a secret love child and everything by the end of that sentence) "you're going to find out the hard way that I like my privacy." There's no way he's letting some slimy member of the press try and corner Rei to get answers, and it's one of the few times he shows that he's capable of being visibly intimidating and deadly serious. ))
2019-04-06 23:19:28
🌀 Not pictured: Me, clutching my heart and sobbing.
2019-04-06 23:22:44
● (( He cares so much about being able to give her a quiet life and even if it's not possible for him in his line of work, being involved with such a high-profile hero (twice!) has to put strain on a person. Imagine that they go out on a date and a reporter chases them down to ask questions and Hawks uses his wings to physically shield her from view while he goes to have a little chat about not bugging people when they're off the clock. ))
2019-04-06 23:24:41
● (( You know what we haven't talked about but need to? Hawks taking Rei flying above the city. It's up to you whether she's nervous beforehand but he wants so badly to be able to show her the kinds of sights he sees everyday, share a part of his world, and give her a breath of that much-needed freedom she's been missing. I need it like fire. ))
2019-04-06 23:26:10
🌀 I imagine Rei is fairly experienced with dealing with reporters. She is naturally a tactful person, and she probably got coached on how to Not interact with the media when she was with Endeavor. It is still a massive pain in the ass to deal with. Stressful. Hawks definitely gets a smooch after he shoos the reporter away.

Hi yes this should have been the very first thing we discussed. This takes priority above all else. This is the very air I breathe. Rei is a tad apprehensive, but you know what? Fuck that. She trusts Hawks with her life, and she will jump at every chance to experience life with him. This is a piece of him, and it is one that she will cherish.
2019-04-06 23:31:32
● (( My heart... So full. My eyes... Overflowing with tears. My hands... Longing to write about Hawks taking the time to brush Rei's hair so tenderly after it's been windblown after a quick flight. Never have I experienced such joy for such a tiny ship. ))
2019-04-06 23:34:51
● (( Can their first smooch be on top of a skyscraper, Please. ))
2019-04-06 23:35:52
🌀 If their first smooch isn't on top of a skyscraper I will riot.
2019-04-06 23:36:15
● (( Thank god. All is right with the world. Their first smooch. And their second. And their third. And that's the point where Hawks mutters he really ought to get her home before he gets too ahead of himself. ))
2019-04-06 23:37:47
🌀 Rei: [quietly] You're taking me with you, right? Because I don't think I can get down from here by myself-
2019-04-06 23:39:21
🌀 How can one rarepair be so perfect... science can't explain it........
2019-04-06 23:39:40
● (( It's got that X factor of being built on mutual respect and care and empathy and I LOVE IT.

Hawks: Didn't I just say I'd take you home? I just don't think I should stay, considering... Uh, considering.

(It's biology and he can't help that he's too fast for his own good.) ))
2019-04-06 23:41:29
🌀 I READ THAT COMPLETELY WRONG MY MIND LEFT OUT THE 'get /her/ home' LMAO.

But this works too. 👀 Rei thinks it's more adorable than anything and teases the fuck out of him. 'lol hold your horses pal.'
2019-04-06 23:44:22
● (( He's TRYING but his horses have got some get up and go to them! He's still hormonal and he's hopped up on the adrenaline rush from flying and he's got the prettiest lady he's ever seen right in front of him, what do you want from him! ))
2019-04-06 23:45:58
● (( It's the matter-of-fact way he says it, that he thinks she's beautiful the same way the sky is blue and water is wet, that makes it wholly unlike the kind of flattery you'd hear from most guys his age. It's not a tactic meant to appeal to her or a way to persuade her into jumping into anything too soon, it's just something he feels and he wants her to know that, plain and simple. ))
2019-04-06 23:48:14
🌀 Hey, I love you and appreciate you, but you need to stop making me cry about a bird man at midnight. It's not fair. You keep kicking me when I'm down. This saccharine shit is killing me.
2019-04-06 23:50:06
● (( If I have to suffer, so do you. I could give it a little bitter kick if that's what you want: How does Endeavor react to the thought of his separated wife and his fanboy colleague running off together? I think that while their kids (Fuyumi in particular, while Shouto and Natsuo need a little convincing) are fine with it because as long as she's happy, they're happy and Hawks is what's made her smile more than she has in years, Enji isn't going to be so easily dissuaded. ))
2019-04-06 23:52:16
🌀 If I'm going down I'm taking you with me, fucker.

If we're going off the assumption that Endeavor is slowly but surely working his way towards being a better person, he doesn't have a leg to stand on in this situation anymore. Once they get divorced, he has no connection to Rei. She is a free elf. So, if he were committed to the being a good guy bit, I imagine he might be miffed, but he won't get involved? Just kinda.. staring and doing some caveman grunts off to the side. Kids these days. Don't know how to respect their elders. When I was a kid, /I/ didn't cuck my idol.

That is the ideal situation.

The truth is, Enji is not a perfect person. No one is, but he is further from the goal than a lot of people. Ex and fanboy running off together? The two people who should have been attached to /him/? That is a recipe for hurt, jealousy, betrayal, entitlement. He is not pleased. He is not amused. Is he a fucking joke to them?? He likely can't raise a big stink about them without raising unwanted attention, but I'm sure he has some choice words prepared. If we /really/ wanted to, this would make for an ugly, conflict-heavy storyline.
2019-04-07 00:00:29
● (( FREE ELF, I'M. I haven't even read the rest of your post, that bit just made me choke on my drink and I hate it. Please never change. ))
2019-04-07 00:01:13
🌀 PLEASE DONT CHOKE,
2019-04-07 00:01:53
● (( I WON'T I'M JUST AMUSED! MMMMMMMMM, god, that's some good shit. I love it. Give me that conflict and resolution with Hawks coming to terms with the fact that sometimes your heroes disappoint you but that doesn't have to be his problem, because he and Rei are happy and that's the only thing that matters. ))
2019-04-07 00:02:58
🌀 'Sometimes your heroes disappoint you' bold of you to assume Endeavor isn't a perpetual disappointment.

Give me Nao and Rei being loving of and protective towards each other and I can die happy.
2019-04-07 00:04:40
● (( Hawks, waltzing around the venerable Todoroki estate as he packs up the rest of Rei's things and invites the kids to come visit whenever they want wearing this: https://bit.ly/2VtVtr1 ))
2019-04-07 00:05:18
🌀 FUCK
2019-04-07 00:06:27
🌀 Nevermind pack it up we just explored this concept to its full potential-
2019-04-07 00:07:11
● (( Final verdict: Naoki is a dumbass himbo who chugs his respect women juice and gets pegged and HE'S EVERYTHING ENJI ISN'T. JUST LEARN TO TAKE THE STRAP ONCE IN A WHILE AND YOU COULD HAVE KEPT YOUR WIFE, MY DUDE. ))
2019-04-07 00:08:16
🌀 JUST LEARN TO TAKE THE STRAP!!!! IT AIN'T THAT HARD!!!!!!!!!!!
2019-04-07 00:09:28
🌀 Get with the times Enji ://///
2019-04-07 00:09:47

Alasdair04/07/2019
n e way so consider: The apartment is getting cramped by the time they're a year into living together and so Nao just decides
"Hey, I'm not using my hero salary for anything. I'mma go buy a house."
jaynathan04/07/2019
they're getting forced out of their apartment by cats,,
JUST
GO OUT AN BUY A HOUSE
no big deal !
Alasdair04/07/2019
NO BIG DEAL AT ALL!
He pays for it in cash, like a bastard
jaynathan04/07/2019
rei: this is fine :))))
Alasdair04/07/2019
It's funny because it's actually uncharacteristic of him but for one of the first times in Rei's memory, he actually seems nervous and unsure of himself
jaynathan04/07/2019
he's being an adult, that is terrifying
Alasdair04/07/2019
"It doesn't have to mean anything if you don't want. I don't want you to feel like you've gotta stay here your whole life. It's just there for as long as you want it."
Which is his way of saying: And so am I
jaynathan04/07/2019
funny that he should say that, because rei is going to make this house mean something
they got a home!!! they're living together!!! absolutely happy!!!!
she wants it to stay that way
Alasdair04/07/2019
He's just so afraid of fucking this up because it's a huge commitment! But he knows what he wants, and let it never be said that he lacks ambition, because once he's committed to something, he's all in
Endeavor seeing Hawks update his Instagram with pictures of Rei decorating their new home
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GL6nLK5LUog
jaynathan04/07/2019
DHLDFNSSGHSKGDGDK
enji: they gonna put my body in a ditch yo
rei and hawks: [holding a shovel] and what of it?
what gets me is how,,, despite their various Issues,,,, they're working incredibly hard to make each other happy and safe and loved and god,,,,,,,, got me a lil emotional there
Alasdair04/07/2019
Shouto:
Shouto:
Shouto:
Shouto: I'm not calling him dad
Nao: Aw, that's okay, we can still go get ice cream if you want
Shouto:
Shouto:
Shouto: I'd like that
FUCK YOU'RE ACTUALLY BEING SWEET AND THEN HERE I AM
GOING FULL GREMLIN
jaynathan04/07/2019
you'll regret saying that honestly
when i am fully rested? it is gremlin time
Alasdair04/07/2019
YES
jaynathan04/07/2019
no more serious content
Alasdair04/07/2019
JOIN ME
jaynathan04/07/2019
i can't top hawks in a baby slut shirt
Alasdair04/07/2019
When I'm awake I'll have daydreamed about SO MANY SWEET THOUGHTS
You can, I believe in you
You'll be the absolute nightmare, I'll be the soft sweaterboy
jaynathan04/07/2019
thank you,, i feel much more powerful now,,,
Alasdair04/07/2019
Rei being able to sit out on their porch in the middle of summer, feel the sun on her face, cold drink in her hand, knowing that she's safe here and that this isn't just some temporary happiness she'll have to give up the next time someone gets angry
Secure in the knowledge that she's in full control of her life and the person she's choosing to spend it with only wants the best for her and he's willing to work to make that happen
Knowing she'd do the same for him
jaynathan04/07/2019
so what im getting from this is, you're a sadist who likes making me cry
got it
Alasdair04/07/2019
;) <3
Kill 'em with kindness
Alasdair04/07/2019
So.
When is Rei's birthday?
And also: How old would you peg her at just so I have an idea?
jaynathan04/07/2019
i had her whole timeline figured out at some point, i need to dig that up again
i believe i have her in her early 40s? and she is a september baby
being honest with you i don't remember why i picked september but that is in my notes, so it's the law now
Alasdair04/07/2019
DO YOU REMEMBER
THE 21ST NIGHT OF SEPTEMBER
LOVE WAS CHANGING THE MINDS OF PRETENDERS
AND CHASING THE CLOUDS AWAY
jaynathan04/07/2019
ULRDGKSNCVDMVFSJVKS
WE HAVE REI'S THEME LADIES AND GENTS
Alasdair04/07/2019
Anyway consider Rei and Nao going on vacation over her birthday because it's been so long since she's actually gotten to celebrate
jaynathan04/07/2019
considered and accepted
what a sweetie,, ,
you know rei is going to return the favor in some way right
can't be outdone by your sugar baby ://///
Alasdair04/07/2019
He wants to go somewhere warm for his birthday because it's so cold at the end of December and he just wants to fly south for the winter
jaynathan04/07/2019
how does he cope with having a crush on someone who adores the cold
Alasdair04/07/2019
With so many layers
And pocket hand warmers
jaynathan04/07/2019
so many layers
rei commissions 50 coats that he can wear with his wings
don't freeze to death
Alasdair04/07/2019
True love is willing to get hypothermia for the woman you adore
jaynathan04/07/2019
that's dedication babey!
jaynathan04/07/2019
hm, you know what i completely forgot about? hawks and dabi
naoki is talking to rei about him and endeavor working together. he tries to play it cool by offhandedly mentioning a scarred dude with a penchant for burning everything up.
Alasdair04/07/2019
Oh, hey, speaking of Dabi
Alasdair04/07/2019
So I thought of this and now I'm going to inflict it onto you:
It's been about five years since they started living together in their house, they've gotten into an easy rhythm with each other, and the future's looking bright. Nao gets a call in the middle of the night and tries to get out of bed without waking Rei (a more difficult task than it seems, given that she's wrapped around him) and when she stirs, he kisses her and whispers that she should go back to sleep. "Just work. I'll be back home before you wake up, 'kay?" "Mm, 'kay. Love you." "I love you, too, snow queen."
It's hours later before she's awoken by pounding at the front door. For a moment, she thinks Nao just forgot his keys and locked himself out, but when she opens the door, it's two police officers in uniform.
"We were informed this was where the winged hero Hawks lives. Are you his wife?"
Rei twists the band around her finger before nodding. "What's going on? Did something--?"
"Ma'am, there's been an incident. May we come in?"
And she gets that sinking feeling in her stomach that grows and grows with every moment she's left wondering.
The "incident" was an attempt to root the last few remaining League of Villains members out of hiding. Hawks was called in to use his connections, but his cover was blown and a scuffle ensued. ('A scuffle,' she thinks. Such a mild word has to mean better news than the worst case scenario. Maybe he's just injured and complaining about the hospital food and he'll be home within the week.)
The building collapsed.
No bodies were found but one.
jaynathan04/07/2019
hey, i have 3 thoughts for you :)
1. how dare you
2. fuck you
3. i'm going to go fucking apeshit
Alasdair04/07/2019
:) Sometimes... Things that hurt you... Are better.
jaynathan04/07/2019
sometimes... things that hurt me... hurt me.........
Alasdair04/07/2019
It builds character
jaynathan04/07/2019
can't build character if you are psychologically destroyed by angst
taps forehead
Alasdair04/07/2019
How does she react? :)
jaynathan04/07/2019
rei has dealt with several types of loss in her life. one would think that, after all the grief she's experienced, she should be desensitized to it by now.

of course – as is made evident by the fact that her husband is quite possibly dead when he should be home with her, should be asleep in their bed, should be safe and at peace – the shoulds are meaningless in this world.

hearing the news is an emotional blast. by all rights, it should have knocked her off her feet. it nearly does, but the burning desire to see this through is enough to keep her upright. if nothing else, she can do this for nao.

her blood has run cold, and so have her features, and the officers are perhaps under the impression that she is in shock. (a number of emotions, states of being, are wreaking havoc on her, but shock is somehow not one of them.) but, sure as day, she steps away from the doorframe she clings to. an icy hand gestures them inside, then swipes over the beads of water that threaten to spill from her eyes.

she won't do him the injustice of crying just yet. this isn't over yet. maybe she can live in denial for another minute.
this just came up on my dash and i might cry

the TIMING on this bitch
Alasdair04/07/2019
:''')
But when she knows for sure. He's gone and he isn't coming back. They need her to identify him, to be sure that they've lost yet another hero in the line of duty.
jaynathan04/07/2019
hell time !
she stays stable for as long as it takes to take care of what needs to be taken care of. body identification, statements, questions. she knows she should be a broken mess. before, she felt she had to keep her emotions on lock. now, it's guilt inducing, as if she is disrespecting him by remaining stoic.

her stoicism only lasts until the police leave. the door closes. she sinks, and she finally succumbs to the grief. it is painful and tortuous and unfair. he never deserved this.
Alasdair04/07/2019
Imagine...
jaynathan04/07/2019
i don't know if i want to--
Alasdair04/07/2019
Imagine Enji finds her. He has no plan, he has no speech prepared, he has no idea what to do but he had to do something.
This happened on his watch.
He's gone and stolen her happiness yet again.
jaynathan04/07/2019
[ohgodohfuck.png]
Alasdair04/07/2019
He's not sure there are any words in the world that could make up for this, that could make this better, and Enji's always been a poor speaker regardless.
But he tries.
"... I'm sorry. He was a good man. Better than I ever was. I'm so sorry, Rei."
jaynathan04/07/2019
this is the one (1) time she can feel his sincerity. somehow, that makes the situation worse. it makes hawks' demise final.
she isn't sure she can bounce back from this.
Alasdair04/07/2019
Shouto, Natsuo, and Fuyumi all rush over in a group as soon as they hear because goddamnit that's their mom and she does not deserve to suffer even more than she already has
jaynathan04/07/2019
you mentioned dabi earlier and i'm very afraid where he comes into this as well
he's partially the catalyst for nao's death
Alasdair04/07/2019
Hee hee hee
jaynathan04/07/2019
fear.png
Alasdair04/07/2019
What makes you assume he didn't take care of it personally?
jaynathan04/07/2019
ah! even worse! great! :)
Alasdair04/07/2019
Dabi has no attachment to the League, not really, but this was a betrayal not just of the League, but of him
He's not going to just take that lying down
jaynathan04/07/2019
rei: that was my husband you son of a bi
rei: wait
Alasdair04/07/2019
Okay but imagine
Okay
Just
Imagine
jaynathan04/07/2019
fear.png intensifies
Alasdair04/07/2019
She gets another visitor
In the middle of the night
One who doesn't knock
jaynathan04/07/2019
:)
Alasdair04/07/2019
He just shows up, and for a moment, in the dim light, for a split second she can almost hope that it was all a mistake, that Naoki's come home, but the hair's too dark and there are patches of terrible burnt skin
"I didn't know he was yours." The voice is a mere rasp, like he'd just screamed himself hoarse, but something in her still recognizes it after so many years. "I had no idea until you were in the news. I never could have dreamed that out of everyone, you'd choose him."
Because after everything
After so much pain and heartache and doing terrible things, the one thing Touya wanted was to spare his mother more pain
jaynathan04/07/2019
i am not emotionally equipped to handle this so all i can think is 'wig'
fuck ,, ,, ,
also can i just say i love the dissonance between
you yesterday: yeah i'm ok with heavier topics as long as they don't involve our characters directly
you today: y'all mine if i write a whole angsty drabble about nao biting the dust?
Alasdair04/07/2019
OKAY I MEAN HEAVY TOPICS AS IN, LIKE, REI WANTING TO GO COMMIT NOT ALIVE AND NAO DOING A NAUGHTY BY FORCING HIMSELF ON HER "BECAUSE LOVE"
I love exploring major character death
jaynathan04/07/2019
jnSDFIAJSLDF I KNOW I'M JUST BULLYING YOU
Alasdair04/07/2019
Bully me harder, it only makes me stronger
jaynathan04/07/2019
my heart can only take so much
you're too powerful already
my life is in your hands
us with royai: haha they have joint parentship of black hayate :)
us with hawksrei: haha hawks died in a terrible accident and rei is griefstricken :)
Alasdair04/07/2019
Naoki walking in ten minutes later with a Crunchwrap Supreme: Hey, babe. Hey, Dabi. What're you two doin'?
Rei: W... Huh
Naoki: Aw, don't tell me, you didn't even check the date? April Fools! I clowned the entire hero society damn good! High five!
Dabi: [smack]
There I made it better
All fixed
jaynathan04/07/2019
jnlSHIFUAJSLDF
ALL BETTER !
Alasdair04/07/2019
Endeavor, on the phone: Oh okay cool Rei you better get your goodbyes in now because I'm gonna beat this fucker to death
jaynathan04/07/2019
MAKLDNFJOIBHYGASDFIHUOJALSDFHASJLDKFAHSJLDKFASDJFLKASFDKL
rei: hold on don't start without me-
Alasdair04/07/2019
And in that moment, the entire world wanted to finish what Hawks started and kill him for real
jaynathan04/07/2019
homestuck voice: just
Alasdair04/07/2019
YEAH BAYBEY
But yeah no anyway so how must it feel losing her husband but gaining the knowledge that her eldest son survived and did the job himself
jaynathan04/07/2019
like shit!
Alasdair04/07/2019
I BET!
jaynathan04/07/2019
SLNJDFLS
no uhhh
boy that would be a lot to process
she's obviously distraught. having dabi confess afterwards? devastating. hearing him be sorry? even worse.
tbh there is no way to quantify or put into words how supremely awful she feels.
Alasdair04/07/2019
Good. >:)
jaynathan04/07/2019
:')
jaynathan04/08/2019
t-poses into an ocean of angst
Alasdair04/08/2019
I'm going to throw myself into the sea and allow our dark mother to take me home
You know what I want...
A Todoroki family RP
Like a group thing
jaynathan04/08/2019
take me home country roads
OH???
Alasdair04/08/2019
Also: Hawks Is There For Some Reason
IDK I JUST THINK IT'D BE NEAT
Since we've never seen them All Interact At Once
Together
jaynathan04/08/2019
'Some Reason' it's because he's fucking their mom sharon come on
Alasdair04/08/2019
OKAY, LISTEN,
God, do you want the worst thing
jaynathan04/08/2019
:eyes:
Alasdair04/08/2019
AlasdairLast Thursday at 10:03 PM
Hawks is dating not one, not two, but FIVE MEMBERS OF THE TODOROKI FAMILY
tiddy suckerLast Thursday at 10:03 PM
FCSDGVHFBJ
AlasdairLast Thursday at 10:03 PM
GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL!
tiddy suckerLast Thursday at 10:03 PM
NOT AT THE SAME TIME H A W K S
AlasdairLast Thursday at 10:05 PM
Shouto: Are you dating my dad
Hawks: Yeah
Shouto: He has a wife
Hawks: Her, too
Shouto: WHAT? Not even Fuyumi would stand f--
Hawks: Welllllllll
Shouto: Jesus fucking christ okay well SURELY NATSUO WOULDN'T BE COOL WITH--
Natsuo: Hey, I finished early today, so about that dinner date--... Oh. Huh. You two having a moment?
Dabi: Sup
Hawks: Oh, hey, babe
Shouto and Natsuo: TOUYA?!
tiddy suckerLast Thursday at 10:06 PM
FSGVDHFBJSDBHFJS
id watch that sitcom
AlasdairLast Thursday at 10:06 PM
I WOULD TOO, THE FUCK
Hawks brings a family back together by dating all of them (separately!!!!)
And that's therapy, everybody
That's literally what inspired the NAP I put up
jaynathan04/08/2019
THDAHEHADAHAFHGAATJFSGSJ
THATS THERAPY BABEY
Alasdair04/08/2019
IT IS!
COSTS MUCH LESS, OF THAT I CAN ASSURE YOU
Hawks is so low-maintenance
jaynathan04/08/2019
OH THANK GOODNESS
Alasdair04/08/2019
Just give him some Redbull and some chia seeds and he's good
jaynathan04/08/2019
THE COST IS WHAT I WAS WORRIED ABOUT
rei: [after seeing hawks down his fifth red bull of the day] so like.. are you good?
Alasdair04/08/2019
Hawks, who is vibrating so fast he can see through time: Yeah of course totally I'm good why wouldn't I be good
jaynathan04/08/2019
rei: oh no reason :^)
Alasdair04/08/2019
I just want every member of the Todoroki clan to be loved and appreciated
And who better to accomplish that than a man who's made of nothing but love
(and cocksure arrogance, but same difference)
jaynathan04/08/2019
i smell a sitcom in the works
how i met your mother (and father and brother and sister and your other brother)
Alasdair04/08/2019
(Your other brother who we don't talk about and who's gotten a little murder-y over the years)
They're good characters Brent
jaynathan04/08/2019
hawks: haha yeah this show went off the rails in season four-
todo family: what show???
Alasdair04/08/2019
ANYWAY, this is all a long-winded way of saying that My Brother, My Brother, My Sister, My Mom, My Dad, Their Boyfriend, and Me is going to have a satisfying finale
jaynathan04/08/2019
AHDAJFJGSDGDG
Alasdair04/08/2019
All told from the perspective of Shouto, who Doesn't Fucking Deserve This
Alasdair04/08/2019
Does Hawks take tasteful gravure shots in this private time
I don't KNOW and it HAUNTS me
We can't prove he DOESN'T have a gallery of professional tasteful photography
jaynathan04/08/2019
you can find his photos if you donate to his patreon duh :////
don't be stingy
Alasdair04/08/2019
Or buy access to his premium Snapchat
jaynathan04/08/2019
gOd
Alasdair04/08/2019
Rei: Whatcha doin'?
Nao: Messaging my 8 sugar daddies threatening to break up with them if they don't send me 3,000 dollars
Rei: Why stop there? Make it 5,000 and offer to throw in a foot pic
Nao: God, I love you
(Too expensive? Not when you're the winged hero. He's a premium cut of wagyu beef, thank you very fucking much.)
jaynathan04/08/2019
throw in a foot pic !
Alasdair04/08/2019
Listen... She knows what she's doing
jaynathan04/08/2019
oh absolutely
without a doubt
jaynathan04/08/2019
i know hawks is busy doing Big Important hero stuff, flying all over the country, etc. but stick with me here
indulge me
hawks and rei Domesticity
spending all weekend running errands
going to the grocery store
walking down the sidewalk arm in arm
filthy stuff like that
Alasdair04/08/2019
Heroes are entitled to paid leave and though Hawks pretty much never uses it before, suddenly he's taking vacations like nobody's business just so he can stick close to home
jaynathan04/08/2019
exactly what you would expect from an absolute bastard like this
Alasdair04/08/2019
HE'S SO BEAUTIFUL, UGH
jaynathan04/08/2019
no he's a bastard he hasn't given out his eyeliner tutorial yet
Alasdair04/08/2019
Those wings are all natural baybey
jaynathan04/08/2019
hawks: this is just how i look :)
rei: [grabbing him by the collar] quit lying
Alasdair04/08/2019
Nao doing Rei's makeup and she's FURIOUS because his technique is IMPECCABLE
Rei idly mentioning that she misses makeup in the hospital and Hawks going "word? Okay, be back in a flash" and he zips out the window only to come back with a fortune spent at Ulta and they spend the day playing with palettes and Hawks espousing about his holy grail products
jaynathan04/08/2019

Alasdair04/08/2019
Hawks telling her very matter-of-factly that she doesn't need makeup to be beautiful but it's nice to be able to accentuate what she already has and make her feel not just pretty, but drop-dead gorgeous
It's what she deserves
jaynathan04/08/2019
good thing she doesn't need the makeup bc she's about to cry it right off
Alasdair04/08/2019
"Also the beauty industry is garbage and rakes in billions of yen by preying on people's insecurities, but, like, check out this lipstain."
jaynathan04/08/2019
sMKDLFJUGASHDFLJAKSDFLKASFD
WILD,,,,
Alasdair04/08/2019
He's a millennial and recognizes there is no ethical consumption under capitalism but he's devoted to his skincare routine like nothing else
And he likes experimenting with makeup, especially with such a lovely canvas in front of him
"My husband is in the other room explaining to the cat that even tho we are going to bed early, he (the cat) is welcome to stay up."
Rei is OP
jaynathan04/08/2019
this is canon
what have we, as a society, done to deserve hawks
he is far too advanced for us
Alasdair04/09/2019
"is my boyfriend broken"
"why did you leave wrestlemania on for the cats"
"they need to learn how to protect us"
I'm sorry I'm sending you every meme post but it's. So important to me.
jaynathan04/09/2019
don't apologize for these Gifts
hawks, the #2 hero: our cats need to be able to protect us
rei, a morosexual: of course you beautiful bastard
Alasdair04/09/2019
Hawks, getting legitimately upset: WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS WHEN I'M NOT AROUND AND MR. FLUFFLES ISN'T PROPERLY TRAINED
Rei: So your solution--
Rei: So you thought--
Rei: God, you're lucky I love you
jaynathan04/09/2019
LSBSKSGIISKDKFKDK
god you're LUCKY-
Alasdair04/09/2019
You think she'd put up with this shit from Enji?
NO
THAT'S LOVE, BAYBEY
jaynathan04/09/2019
TSKIRTYKHDKDGKDGDK
your dumbass representation is [kisses fingers]
Alasdair04/09/2019
I live to serve
Rei: So out of curiosity, your placement in high school--
Hawks: I was the top of my class in every subject except math
Rei:
Rei:
Rei: Then how did you become this
Hawks: Just because I'm smart as fuck on paper doesn't mean I can't be dumb as fuck in reality
Rei: Our education system truly has failed you
jaynathan04/09/2019
oh worm,????
Alasdair04/09/2019
On god I would die for characters who are quite literally genius level when it comes to measurable tests but just. Just absolute FUCKING idiots in all areas of life that actually matter.
jaynathan04/09/2019
KIN??
Alasdair04/09/2019
Hawks: can talk circles around you about physics and airspeed velocity
Hawks: can't figure out how to work a can opener and has to call Rei, in frustrated tears, to come help him
jaynathan04/09/2019
DUDULKDHKFHLGKD
he is EXTREMELY lucky she loves him
Alasdair04/09/2019
See, here's the thing,
He and Shouto are kindred spirits
jaynathan04/09/2019
rei: have you.. never opened a can before..... nao........
oh absolutely
Alasdair04/09/2019
Hawks: What am I, an animal? I used a pocket knife like a civilized person
jaynathan04/09/2019
rei has her head in her hands 9 times out of 10
how has he survived this long
it doesn't make sense
Alasdair04/09/2019
Lots of pop tops and fervent prayer
jaynathan04/09/2019
can that exists without a pop top: pick a god and pray
Alasdair04/09/2019
Here's who I think best boy gets along best with, in order:
Shouto - Takes some warming up but the fact that they're so dissimilar belies the fact that they're on the exact same mental frequency with frightening accuracy ("Man, I wish there was a jar of pickles so I could--" "See what would happen if you stuck 'em in the microwave on full blast?" "YEAH!!!")
Natsuo - Has had a lot of time to get to know Hawks, they're both extroverted and love people, super easy to get along with
Fuyumi - Polite but that's about as far as she'll go, she's still not sure about him and wishes Rei could just make up with her dad so she doesn't have to call some guy who's actually a couple months younger than her "stepdad"
Dabi - You know what he did
jaynathan04/09/2019
you know what he did
poor fuyumi holding out hope though RIADJAADJ
Alasdair04/09/2019
IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN SIS LET IT GO AND HAVE DADDY NAOKI TAKE YOU OUT FOR SOME BONDING RETAIL THERAPY
jaynathan04/09/2019
DHLGDKDHKDGJJDFFSJ
she would rather die than call him dad or daddy thanks-
hard pass!
Alasdair04/09/2019
Okay but when they're out and about
Some poor clueless clerk assumes she's his girlfriend and he just gets The Biggest shit-eating grin on his face as he says FAR TOO LOUDLY, "Actually, I'm her father" and lets god figure it out
CHAOTIC BASTARD MANS
jaynathan04/09/2019
JFASGKGEKKDHKEG
HES TERRIBLE????
Alasdair04/09/2019
HE'S THE WORST AND THAT EARNS FUYUMI'S UNDYING HATRED
SHE REFUSES TO SPEAK TO HIM
TREATS HIM LIKE FURNITURE
ADDRESSES ANY AND ALL CONVERSATION TO REI AND REI ONLY
Natsuo thinks it's fucking hilarious when he goes, "Hey, cooler, better dad, can I have some money?" "Are you using it to do crimes?" "No?" "Sweet, here you go"
jaynathan04/09/2019
natsuo and hawks pull this shit around enji and he just ??? i have money too ??? why is he the cool dad ???
quit flexing on him ???
Alasdair04/09/2019
It's not about the money, ENJI, it's because he and Natsuo have a secret handshake and do chest bumps and he actually LISTENS to his kids' problems
jaynathan04/09/2019
enji: but i have money
hawks: the future is now old man
jaynathan04/10/2019
[at the store]
rei: can you go get some broccoli sweetheart
nao: yeah sure
[nao leaves, comes back 5 minutes later with a piece of cauliflower in hand]
nao: ok i found some broccoli but i think it's dead
rei: