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“EDDIE! HURRY 🔺 UP 🔺 ALREADY!”

Eddie sighed inwardly. Today 📅 was 👏 supposed 🍆 to 💦 be 🐝 one 😤 of 💦 the 👏 happiest days 📆 of 💦 his 💦 life. 👤 He 👨 was 👏 going 🏃 to 💦 propose to 💦 Myra and 👏 she 👩 was 👏 going 🏃 to 💦 say 🗣 yes 🎓 and 👏 they’d live 🙅 a 👌 suburban happily-ever-after with 👏 two 💏 children 🚼 and 👏 a 👌 dog. 🐶 Everyone 👥 had 💋 always 🔥 said 💬 what 😦 a 👌 good 👌 pair 💑 they 👥 made 👑 and 👏 if 👏 everyone 👥 else 😩 was 👏 happy, 😊 why 😡 couldn’t 😲 he 👨 be? 🐝 What 😦 was 👏 wrong 👎 with 👏 him? 👴

“EDDIE!”

He 👨 could 🔒 feel 😁 the 👏 beginnings of 💦 a 👌 migraine coming 💦 on. 🔛 “I’M 👌 CUMMING! 💦 GIVE 👉 ME 😭 FIVE 🔥 MINUTES!”

“EDDIE! YOU 👈 DON’T 🙅 NEED 👉 TO 💦 SHOUT 😠 AT 🍆 ME!”

He 👨 heaved another 🔄 deep 😱 sigh and 👏 reached for 🍆 the 👏 ring 📞 box 📦 in 👏 his 💦 pocket. 😜 It 💯 wasn’t 😩 in 👏 his 💦 pocket. 😜