Opening up to Nakiri

[11:31] Nakiri Reiha says, "I read from Koume's tome. Only the Arithmacy and Glyph chapters."
[11:31] Ethan Hawke says, "They're heavy chapters."
[11:32] Nakiri Reiha says, "Yeah, she said that's what I need to work on after I showed her the circles I could do."
[11:32] Ethan Hawke says, "I feel like you're telling me that because you think she's wrong."
[11:33] Nakiri Reiha says, "No, I thought she was right."
[11:33] Nakiri Reiha says, "I missed calculations and I didn't know about all of the glyphs that could be used."
[11:34] Ethan Hawke says, "Some of them are incredibly situational."
[11:36] Ethan Hawke says, "I'll admit some circles and practicing is easier when you have them memorized or on hand, but it feels to me as if it'll slow you down to learn about them."
[11:37] Nakiri Reiha asks, "How come?"
[11:37] Ethan Hawke says, "Arithmancy is complicated and there are a lot of glyphs."
[11:39] Ethan Hawke says, "It's a lot to learn - I don't know if you can handle it."
[11:41] Nakiri Reiha says, "Koume said I could handle it..."
[11:42] Nakiri didn't seem put down by the fact he may or may not have thought it'd be too much for her. If anything, what she'd heard prior to this may have been right.

"Even if I can't manifest the portal yet, I have been working on this for years too."
(Nakiri Reiha)
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[11:49] Closer inspection of Ethan himself may reveal a bit more than him thinking she couldn't handle it. As he stood there more or less thinking for quite a while on his next reply the exhausted features that carried themselves on his face became more prominent. Lips parted as his head shook.

"I just don't want you to lose it, Nakiri."

That... was definitely an odd reason. Almost like he feared for her what was happening to him, even if unrelated. Even if he had managed to tone down the paranoia he felt around just about everyone by a bit it still attacked him in his weakest moments.

Ethan gazed off towards the ocean, his mind playing scenarios for him that he wanted no part of; Koume and Nakiri being united to take him down in some sort of way, working together to strip him of what he had worked hard to earn. How would they even do that? It didn't make sense.

Still, he feared. And an obvious, unwarranted fear lead to stupid words being uttered, the kind the girl would most likely know were off.

"I think you should learn under Koume instead."

Considering the fun they had together and the pride and affection he felt towards her it made no sense whatsoever. Part of it banged with both hands against that window pane in the middle of his soul, begging him to stop being an idiot. Occult madness wasn't treating him well.
(Ethan Hawke)
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[12:09] Nakiri's gaze remained unmoving, unexpressive. She leaned in ever so slightly, as if trying to discern whether or not Koume's words about him were actually right or not. But, this seemed different than that. There was almost certainly something else at hand with Ethan - if anyone could tell when someone's hiding their actual feelings, it'd be another individual that's done the same for a vast portion of their lifetime. Nakiri.

"I wouldn't lose it. You've been working with me, preparing me for the day I'd actually become capable of utilizing Spatial Magic. After all, you're still the best teacher I have. And a good friend, in my opinion. That's all the motivation and experience I need to be able to be able to carefully take in all the information you're passing on. Even I could see the way you tried to motivate Magdalen by being blunter than usual."

Pale ruby hues briefly dart off towards the ocean, reflexively assuming he'd found something out there - but there was nothing. So she'd look back towards Ethan, her lips pursed together, as if she'd been about to carry on with what she was about to say until he uttered that last sentence. He didn't want to teach her anymore? It sunk deeper into her mind. A deep intake of air before she held her breath - the words weren't coming to mind.

But, for the first time, her eyebrows... They slowly furrowed themselves downwards, displaying some degree of anger or confusion. Almost certainly both.

"I don't believe I heard you correctly. The stupidity of what you just said was too loud. Could you repeat that with more conviction and volume so I can beat that out of you?" She seemed entirely serious about that statement, her right hand clenched into a fist a few times before reachingbehind herself. Her palm resting atop her staff. Her teeth gently grit together within her mouth, even if she had to beat him or be beaten by him, she wasn't losing them without getting to the bottom of this.
(Nakiri Reiha)
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[12:19] The flattery, compliments and reassuring that Nakiri gave had been expected. She was always like that, after all. What wasn't expected, however, was her reaction shortly after his words of rejection. He could hear it in her voice: Anger, confusion, and a tinge of sadness, too. He didn't have to see her face to be able to tell she was finally showing something he had never seen before.

His eyes shifted towards her, meeting with an unusual expression, something that reached at the very depths of his heart, though he wasn't sure why. As he saw her reaching for her weapon he moved, too. His left hand extended outwards - shooting straight for her shoulder and holding itself there if she'd allow it, hoping it would slow down her stop her more aggressive motion and thoughts.

Green eyes met with blue hue, staring at them for long enough to become a window to eachother's soul. On one end was a girl that was afraid and angry by someone's stupidity. On the other was a broken idiot who couldn't even find a solution to his own issues. Fear had dominated Ethan's mind, but even when it did, he had the heart to share it.

"I don't want you to fall with me when I do. I can't trust anyone anymore - not even you. It's only getting worse, Nakiri. I know I don't have any reason to... be afraid, but I am. I just don't want you to end up having a horrible reputation just like I do."

Heartfelt emotions had been spilled. His hand slowly moved down from her shoulder as he added the part that mattered most, something he may not have showed enough.

"You're important to me, Nakiri. I don't want to hurt you."
(Ethan Hawke)
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[12:35] Nakiri's advances towards her weapon had an attempt to hault her from going even further than she already had. She'd slowly exhale. Her hands drifts away from the weapon and to her side once more. She'd just leave both arms hanging with nothign else to do at the moment. Other than that, she'd been staring back at Ethan as he stares at her too.

Most of the emotion bubbling to the surface had soon dissipated as quickly as they'd appeared in the first place. As he explained what internal conflict had been going on inside of him, she didn't necessarily have a reason to be angered. She felt a faint sadness replacing the previous.

"...Then if you have no reason to be afraid but you still are - why haven't you sought assistance from anyone about that? Does Jesse even know? And what reputation? I only know you as far as being my teacher and friend. How have you fallen? You'rethe one that's sparked the fire in countless people to try learning the art of Wayfinding. The youngest to learn it too. If anything, your reputation is something that people should be trying to live up to." She concludes,

"There's not much that could hurt me that I haven't already been through. I-- My reputation is just 'that girl that trains all the time' or 'that boring girl' to the people I don't actually care about. But to my friends, they see many things in me that even I didn't know I did or had. All I'm saying is; I think what you're feeling could be worked through and overcome."
(Nakiri Reiha)
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[12:43] Ethan shook his head lightly in the midst of her words, his eyes remaining stuck right upon hers. Lips parted with emotions few would accept.

"I have to fix this on my own."

Not being able to trust anyone else left him with only this as a solution he could see. Of course it wasn't the most sound one and Nakiri would probably think he's an idiot for thinking that it was the answer, but that's how he felt - there was no other way.

Despite the fear in his heart and this pressure that told him to run away, Ethan reached out for his student - aiming to pull her closer as she spoke of herself in such a bad way. An embrace was what he offered, a place to hide her face and let emotions flow should their be any that deserved it. Hearfelt words followed.

"I'm glad you asked me to teach you years ago."

Maybe he needed that hug, too.
(Ethan Hawke)
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[12:53] Nakiri would've been cut off at the end by the unexpected embrace - she felt the muscle memory keeping her face so rigidly in form all of the time undergo a momentary lapse. She closed her eyes, frowning. Even an unseen tear or two slipped out but were swiftly absorbed by his clothing.

Though, she didn't just stand there awkwardly. She returned the gesture, those hanging arms looped around to return the embrace. If she recalled correctly, this was probably the first or second time she'd been hugged in over six years. It was actually pleasant. With this in mind, she'd probably give this sort of friendly gesture to a few other individuals she cared for.

Eventually, she'd aim to release the man and straighten her posture. Her expression had alread set back into the blank slate it had always been. Nothing more, nothing less.

" Alright then. We both know doing that alone isn't a good idea though.I think Jesse or something would want to help too. Are you sure?"
(Nakiri Reiha)
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[12:58] Ethan allowed her (and himself) to indulge in that short moment of proximity, eventually releasing the girl a few moments after she let go. A small nod came from him, followed by a forced smile.

"I'm sure."

What could've been a moment for learning about spatial magic had turned into something much more important, or so it felt. She deserved to know how her teacher was feeling and what he was going through - it would make her learning the arts a bit easier, he believed.

Still, that lingering feeling of fear eating at the back of his mind was there. He couldn't completely suppress it. Nakiri's small outburts had managed to make him understand that she actually cared for him and wouldn't let him just... Go. Her insisting he'd get help from others showed she care.

.. Even if some mad part of Ethan's mind told him that Jesse was in on it, too, he managed to repress it.

"What do you want to do?" He asked. She had earned to call the shots.
(Ethan Hawke)
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[13:04] Nakiri twists her upper body from one side to the next, popping different sections of her spine with each movement. The relief was addictive - thus the reason she was constantly popping her joints, or it was just the abundance of tension from her neverending battles.

"How come you weren't with everyone fighting the Undead yesterday? Also, I think a step towards recovery is teaching me from Elisheva's tome. I want to know about Conversion and Portal." She'd nod.
(Nakiri Reiha)
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[13:05] Ethan Hawke says, "I.. was going through some stuff of my own."
[13:06] Ethan gestured soon after that.

"I can teach you about the other circles. Lead the way. Unless you'd rather do this on the beach."
(Ethan Hawke)
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