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- 1
- 00:00:00,399 --> 00:00:03,899
- Download Only Hindi Audio of this movie from
- akumenang.com
- 2
- 00:00:03,920 --> 00:00:09,245
- ...it's full-on double rainbow all
- the way across the sky!
- 3
- 00:00:09,840 --> 00:00:11,649
- Whoa!
- 4
- 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,286
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
- 5
- 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:17,051
- Oh! Oh, my God!
- 6
- 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:19,647
- Whoo!
- 7
- 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:21,649
- What does this mean?
- 8
- 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:25,366
- It's so bright.
- 9
- 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,767
- Oh, my God, it's so bright and vivid.
- 10
- 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,571
- It's starting to look
- like a triple rainbow.
- 11
- 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,370
- Oh!
- 12
- 00:00:35,080 --> 00:00:37,162
- Going streaking across the quad!
- 13
- 00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:39,881
- (MAN LAUGHING)
- 14
- 00:00:45,160 --> 00:00:46,844
- MAN: Coochie, coochie, coochie!
- 15
- 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,324
- (GIRLS LAUGHING)
- 16
- 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:53,645
- DAVID: Yeah. No, I know. Uh-huh.
- 17
- 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,320
- No, I'm not. I'm not.
- No, I'm paying attention.
- 18
- 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:59,121
- Mom, I'm listening. Just talk.
- 19
- 00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:01,801
- - Tyrone.
- - Are you going trick-or-treating?
- 20
- 00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:03,565
- - No, because...
- - Pow!
- 21
- 00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:09,651
- (BUZZES)
- 22
- 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,570
- (INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)
- 23
- 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,728
- (BABY SPITS UP)
- 24
- 00:01:39,520 --> 00:01:41,841
- (BABY CRYING)
- 25
- 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:48,730
- (INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)
- 26
- 00:02:08,640 --> 00:02:10,927
- I'm in the car. I'm literally in the car.
- 27
- 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:12,565
- David, hey. David Clark.
- 28
- 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:13,841
- Rick Nathanson.
- 29
- 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:17,724
- - Uh, I'm sorry.
- - Little Ricky. We went to college together.
- 30
- 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:19,644
- Oh, shit. Hey, dude.
- 31
- 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:23,287
- We all took ecstasy at Dave Matthews
- one time and I tried to kiss you.
- 32
- 00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:25,844
- That's right. I remember that. Yeah.
- 33
- 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:27,167
- Yeah. "Crash."
- 34
- 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:28,441
- Yup.
- 35
- 00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:31,564
- Wow. I didn't recognize you.
- You look very different.
- 36
- 00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:33,888
- I've gained a little bit of daddy weight.
- 37
- 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:35,491
- You know the drill.
- 38
- 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:37,250
- Actually, I don't, no.
- 39
- 00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:41,009
- - No way. No way! Still a free agent.
- - Mm.
- 40
- 00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:44,363
- You son of a bitch!
- You lucky son of a bitch.
- 41
- 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:48,525
- You lucky, lucky son of a bitch.
- Wow, that's amazing. Wow.
- 42
- 00:02:49,640 --> 00:02:52,086
- Here. For old times' sake, huh?
- 43
- 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,041
- For daddy stress.
- 44
- 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:56,411
- You're still dealing weed?
- 45
- 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:58,445
- Best in Denver.
- 46
- 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:01,328
- That's fucking awesome. Oh, my God.
- 47
- 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:03,446
- That is so cool.
- 48
- 00:03:03,640 --> 00:03:05,369
- - You're still at it.
- - Yeah.
- 49
- 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:07,642
- - I envy you, man. I do.
- - Ah.
- 50
- 00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:10,525
- Look at you. No wife, no kids.
- 51
- 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,091
- - No responsibilities.
- - Mm-hm.
- 52
- 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:14,567
- Pfft, nothing. You got nothing.
- 53
- 00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:17,161
- You could disappear tomorrow
- and who'd even know?
- 54
- 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:19,924
- - Oh, what I wouldn't give.
- - Yeah.
- 55
- 00:03:20,120 --> 00:03:22,361
- Oh, hey, I didn't mean
- that in like, I mean...
- 56
- 00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,211
- No. It's all right. It doesn't bother me.
- It's all right.
- 57
- 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:27,604
- - Great seeing you.
- - Great seeing you.
- 58
- 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:29,370
- Okay, bud, I believe in you.
- 59
- 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,409
- - Hey, David?
- - Yeah?
- 60
- 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:34,247
- - Facebook me. We'll get weird.
- - I don't think so.
- 61
- 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,245
- - Ha, ha! Get out of here.
- - Good luck with the family.
- 62
- 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:38,925
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- 63
- 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:40,804
- Oh, fuck. Fuck me. Fuck.
- Hey, great news.
- 64
- 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:42,923
- We're gonna get high and fuck tonight.
- 65
- 00:03:43,120 --> 00:03:45,407
- I'm sorry, honey.
- Put Mommy on the phone, okay?
- 66
- 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:48,649
- (CAR ENGINE STARTS)
- 67
- 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:00,444
- (NATALIA KILLS' "PROBLEM"
- PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)
- 68
- 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:04,326
- I'm-a take my skin', boot, rings
- All off
- 69
- 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,888
- Skirt, boots, rings All off
- 70
- 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:11,129
- Ooh, baby, you so bad, boy
- Drive me mad, boy
- 71
- 00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:13,402
- You don't care what they
- Say about me
- 72
- 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:17,406
- Girl is a problem
- Girl is a problem, problem
- 73
- 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:26,805
- Wow.
- 74
- 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,731
- - You dance super good.
- - Thanks.
- 75
- 00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:32,002
- I'm Kymberly. With a Y.
- 76
- 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:33,247
- (CHUCKLES)
- 77
- 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,522
- I'm Rose. With an R.
- 78
- 00:04:36,200 --> 00:04:37,804
- Is that your stage name?
- 79
- 00:04:38,040 --> 00:04:39,883
- - My what?
- - Your stage name.
- 80
- 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:43,323
- To protect yourself from the creeps
- out there. You should pick one.
- 81
- 00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:48,401
- You know, something simple but sexy
- and cute and short, maybe.
- 82
- 00:04:48,640 --> 00:04:51,086
- - Do you have a nickname?
- - Totally!
- 83
- 00:04:51,280 --> 00:04:52,520
- Great. Use that, because...
- 84
- 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:54,643
- I even got a tattoo of it.
- Do you wanna see?
- 85
- 00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:55,921
- Uh, well, n...
- 86
- 00:04:56,120 --> 00:04:57,326
- KYMBERLY: Check it out.
- 87
- 00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:01,087
- ROSE: "Boner Garage." Oh, whoa.
- 88
- 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:03,049
- You got a little arrow there even.
- 89
- 00:05:03,280 --> 00:05:05,009
- Is that not like the hottest?
- 90
- 00:05:05,240 --> 00:05:07,242
- Boner Garage, you're up.
- 91
- 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:11,570
- Oh, look at that. So excited and
- full of life. That'll fade.
- 92
- 00:05:11,760 --> 00:05:16,641
- Hey, Rose. I know you're "technically" on
- break, but I need a lap dance. Table five.
- 93
- 00:05:16,840 --> 00:05:19,684
- Just don't get too close.
- The guy has two hook hands.
- 94
- 00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:20,967
- (SIGHS)
- 95
- 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:22,730
- How did we let that guy back in here?
- 96
- 00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:25,401
- Must have picked the locks. Ha, ha!
- 97
- 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:32,491
- (SIGHS)
- 98
- 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:54,886
- How was work this evening?
- 99
- 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:56,201
- ROSE: What do you care?
- 100
- 00:05:56,400 --> 00:05:57,526
- I'm just asking.
- 101
- 00:05:57,720 --> 00:05:58,960
- ROSE: Oh, just don't.
- 102
- 00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:01,203
- Fine. Well, is your dummy boyfriend around?
- 103
- 00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:03,721
- No. Jimmy's with his parents. Why?
- 104
- 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:06,804
- Well, because Jimmy still owes me
- 400 bucks, so...
- 105
- 00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:09,442
- Maybe you shouldn't loan drugs
- to people.
- 106
- 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:12,362
- - All right. Good tip.
- - Mm-hm.
- 107
- 00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:16,443
- I was thinking is that maybe you
- could help him out, settle his debt.
- 108
- 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:20,762
- - Not a fucking chance.
- - You'd be doing me a solid, neighbor.
- 109
- 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:23,406
- Oh, really? Neighbor?
- You're not a neighbor.
- 110
- 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,604
- You're a drug dealer whose apartment
- smells like cheese and feet.
- 111
- 00:06:26,800 --> 00:06:29,690
- Mm. Yeah, it's a candle
- I got from Anthropologie.
- 112
- 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,770
- Cheesy Feet. That's what they call it.
- It's a bestseller.
- 113
- 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,721
- Oh, Rose, got a piece of your mail here.
- 114
- 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:40,767
- I'd lend you some money,
- but we're not neighbors.
- 115
- 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:42,206
- Oh, you're such a dick!
- 116
- 00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:45,124
- Have fun dying alone, jerk.
- 117
- 00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:47,641
- Have fun digging out the singles
- from your crotch.
- 118
- 00:06:47,880 --> 00:06:49,609
- ROSE: My crotch only takes 20s, David.
- 119
- 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,366
- Hey, David.
- 120
- 00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:58,604
- - Hi, Kenny.
- - I heard you and Mrs. O'Reilly fighting.
- 121
- 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:01,849
- It's called flirting, Kenny.
- You'll learn about it in college.
- 122
- 00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:05,046
- What are you doing up?
- It's almost 2. Where's your mom?
- 123
- 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:09,245
- - Uh, she went for a drink. With a friend.
- - When?
- 124
- 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:11,285
- Last week.
- 125
- 00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:13,801
- Uh, so I got the whole place to myself.
- 126
- 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,731
- Yeah. Rolling Han Solo
- for the weekend.
- 127
- 00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:18,888
- DAVID: Mm-hm.
- 128
- 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:21,964
- Um, speaking of rolling,
- I was wondering if...
- 129
- 00:07:22,160 --> 00:07:25,607
- - I don't sell to kids, Kenny.
- - I'm 18. I'm gonna get my own place soon.
- 130
- 00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:26,887
- Not a kid, David.
- 131
- 00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:30,040
- Yeah, you are. Take care.
- 132
- 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:32,847
- CASEY: Give me my fucking phone.
- 133
- 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:35,964
- - You guys are such assholes.
- MAN 1: - Hey, baby.
- 134
- 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:37,400
- Leave her alone.
- 135
- 00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:39,441
- MAN 1: Oh, I'm sorry, baby.
- KENNY: Unhand her.
- 136
- 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:42,005
- Hey, leave her alone.
- 137
- 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:43,611
- (GRUNTS)
- 138
- 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:45,723
- Goddamn it, Kenny.
- 139
- 00:07:45,920 --> 00:07:48,039
- - Fucking tough guy Huh?
- MAN 2: - You don't have to...
- 140
- 00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:49,201
- DAVID: Hey! Hey, hey, hey.
- 141
- 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:51,727
- Easy, easy. What's going on here?
- 142
- 00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:55,970
- - Mind your fucking business, old man.
- - Oh, my God. You're a dude. Ha, ha!
- 143
- 00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:59,568
- That scared me. Your voice was so much
- deeper than your bone structure.
- 144
- 00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:01,762
- These assholes are trying
- to steal my iPhone.
- 145
- 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:04,048
- You have an iPhone?
- Aren't you homeless?
- 146
- 00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:06,083
- So? Fuck you, dude.
- 147
- 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:09,049
- Okay, this was fun. Carry on.
- 148
- 00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:10,890
- - Come on, let's go.
- - What? No.
- 149
- 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:13,328
- These guys are picking on her
- and it's not fair.
- 150
- 00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:15,966
- What you gonna do, white boy?
- You some type of hero?
- 151
- 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:17,650
- Not a hero. He's a dumb kid.
- 152
- 00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:21,727
- I got an idea. Leave the girl alone.
- Just move along. Huh, what do you say?
- 153
- 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,160
- - "Move along"?
- DAVID: - Yeah.
- 154
- 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:26,762
- - What are you, some kind of cop?
- - He's not a cop. He's actually really cool.
- 155
- 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:28,200
- - Thanks.
- - He's a drug dealer.
- 156
- 00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:30,568
- - Really?
- - Goddamn it, Kenny.
- 157
- 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:31,886
- Give me your backpack.
- 158
- 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:33,161
- I don't wanna fight.
- 159
- 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:36,847
- Well, there's not gonna be a fight.
- See, you either give me the backpack...
- 160
- 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:39,566
- ...or I'm gonna stab you in the neck
- and take it.
- 161
- 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:40,921
- (WHISTLES)
- 162
- 00:08:41,160 --> 00:08:43,766
- It's a real Sophie's choice here, huh?
- All right.
- 163
- 00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:45,286
- Okay, backpack it is.
- 164
- 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:46,561
- If you wa...
- 165
- 00:08:49,080 --> 00:08:50,161
- Run, Kenny!
- 166
- 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:53,561
- MAN 1: You're dead meat!
- 167
- 00:08:58,400 --> 00:09:02,325
- Hey, sorry, I dropped my phone.
- Are we still going out tonight or what?
- 168
- 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:05,730
- Fucking shit! Shit!
- 169
- 00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:08,210
- (MAN 2 LAUGHS)
- 170
- 00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:09,885
- Oh, shit.
- 171
- 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:18,970
- Sorry. This is fucking dumb.
- 172
- 00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:23,882
- (GROANS)
- 173
- 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:28,169
- MAN 1: Whoa-ho-ho, motherfucker.
- 174
- 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:32,004
- - We got you now.
- - Unh!
- 175
- 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:35,283
- MAN 1: Do whatever's in the safe too.
- MAN 2: Look at that.
- 176
- 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:38,324
- DAVID: It's not even my money.
- If you take that my boss will kill me.
- 177
- 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:42,370
- KENNY: You okay, David?
- I can help. I'll call the cops.
- 178
- 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,011
- No, I'm okay.
- 179
- 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:48,922
- (CELL PHONE BUZZING)
- 180
- 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,847
- DAVID: Hey!
- 181
- 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:03,289
- Whoa, what the...! Unh!
- 182
- 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,482
- MAN: When Mr. Brad calls, you answer!
- Get in there!
- 183
- 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,529
- DAVID: Please don't tell me
- where we're going. I love surprises.
- 184
- 00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:20,362
- - All right. Okay.
- - Can I help you?
- 185
- 00:10:20,560 --> 00:10:22,688
- DAVID: Hi. You ordered two black guys.
- 186
- 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:24,848
- Oh. Okay. This guy.
- 187
- 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:27,361
- No. David Clark here
- to see Mr. Gurdlinger, please?
- 188
- 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,921
- I'll tell him you're here.
- Can I get you something?
- 189
- 00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:31,929
- Coffee. Tea. Fresca.
- 190
- 00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:33,167
- DAVID: Hmm.
- 191
- 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,801
- You know what,
- a Fresca sounds really good.
- 192
- 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:37,519
- - You got it.
- DAVID: - Appreciate it.
- 193
- 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,966
- Hold on one second.
- You guys want anything? It's on me.
- 194
- 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:41,326
- Replenishes electrolytes.
- 195
- 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:44,205
- Don't want you cramping up
- when you jerk each other off.
- 196
- 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,481
- Nice meeting you.
- 197
- 00:10:49,080 --> 00:10:50,320
- Easy.
- 198
- 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:52,370
- Easy. Oof!
- 199
- 00:10:52,560 --> 00:10:54,881
- Okay. I'm gonna hang out here
- if that's all right.
- 200
- 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:57,128
- Oh, thank you for that.
- That's very helpful.
- 201
- 00:10:57,320 --> 00:11:00,085
- Oh! David Clark.
- 202
- 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:03,250
- You're a hard man to find.
- Take it easy on the plastic.
- 203
- 00:11:03,440 --> 00:11:05,761
- Whoa, Brad, what the fuck is this?
- 204
- 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:09,126
- Look, man, I was gonna call you back.
- Do not kill me.
- 205
- 00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:11,521
- - I got robbed, okay. I swear.
- BRAD: - Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- 206
- 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:12,766
- What are you...? What...?
- 207
- 00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:14,007
- Oh, the plastic?
- 208
- 00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:15,441
- Yeah, the plastic.
- 209
- 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:16,687
- I've seen Dexter.
- 210
- 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:21,488
- Buddy, I'm putting in a new skylight,
- you idiot. Ha, ha.
- 211
- 00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:25,043
- You should have seen your face just now.
- You shit a brick.
- 212
- 00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:27,364
- Well, what am I supposed to think, man?
- 213
- 00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:30,370
- You've got these thugs throwing a bag
- over my head. Come on.
- 214
- 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:33,121
- I'm sorry about that.
- I didn't mean to freak you out.
- 215
- 00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:36,324
- - It's fine.
- - You do know I've killed people though?
- 216
- 00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,086
- Yeah, Brad, I know.
- 217
- 00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:39,486
- Ha-ha. All right, have a seat.
- 218
- 00:11:41,160 --> 00:11:42,605
- DAVID: Whoa, what the fuck is that?
- 219
- 00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:46,083
- What? Oh, my orca?
- Yeah, I bought an orca.
- 220
- 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:47,486
- (SIGHS)
- 221
- 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:49,324
- I make a lot of money.
- 222
- 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:51,961
- DAVID: So you bought a whale?
- 223
- 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:53,685
- Well, I don't like sports cars.
- 224
- 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,360
- - Yeah, yeah.
- - So where's my money, David?
- 225
- 00:11:56,680 --> 00:11:59,160
- Come on, man. We go back.
- 226
- 00:11:59,400 --> 00:12:01,368
- We do go back.
- But it's not college anymore.
- 227
- 00:12:01,560 --> 00:12:03,608
- We're not selling lids out of my dorm room.
- 228
- 00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:06,371
- And you owe me $43,000.
- 229
- 00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:09,564
- I told you, I got robbed, Brad.
- They took everything I had, man.
- 230
- 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:12,843
- This week's drop, 22 grand
- of my money that I'd saved. I'm fucked.
- 231
- 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:18,166
- Listen, this is a fucked-up situation.
- But I might have a win-win for both of us.
- 232
- 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,451
- - Great.
- - I have a smidge of very choice...
- 233
- 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:23,324
- ...mari-ju-ana down in Mexico...
- 234
- 00:12:23,520 --> 00:12:25,409
- ...and I need it here by Sunday night.
- 235
- 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:28,444
- My regular courier is out
- because he got gunned down.
- 236
- 00:12:28,680 --> 00:12:29,920
- That's where you come in.
- 237
- 00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:32,727
- You could be my mule.
- I need someone I can trust.
- 238
- 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:36,527
- Go to Mexico, bring it back by Sunday
- night, not only will I forgive your debt...
- 239
- 00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:41,089
- ...I will pay you
- a standard courier fee of $100,000.
- 240
- 00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:44,369
- You're gonna give me 100 grand to move
- a smidge across the border?
- 241
- 00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:47,447
- Smidge and a half. It's nothing.
- 242
- 00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:50,644
- Dude, I got rolled
- by the fucking cast of Annie.
- 243
- 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:54,401
- I come walking in here and you ask me
- to be an international drug dealer.
- 244
- 00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:57,888
- This is easy money, David.
- All you gotta do is pop down to Mexico...
- 245
- 00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:01,527
- ...go to this address, tell them you're
- there to pick up for Pablo Chacon.
- 246
- 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:03,848
- - Who the fuck is Pablo Chacon?
- - I am.
- 247
- 00:13:04,040 --> 00:13:06,884
- (SPEAKS IN SPANISH THEN CHUCKLES)
- 248
- 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:10,766
- You don't get respect from Mexicans
- when your name is Brad Gurdlinger, right?
- 249
- 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:15,522
- I mean, that's white in any language.
- See? Big Bad Brad thought of everything.
- 250
- 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:22,091
- I don't know. I don't think so, man.
- This is way out of my league.
- 251
- 00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:23,685
- It's a federal crime.
- 252
- 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:27,805
- If I try to cross the border with more
- than a pound, you're talking like, um...
- 253
- 00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:32,009
- Twenty-five years in Mexican prison.
- If you get a happy judge.
- 254
- 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:34,242
- Yeah. Jeez. Not good.
- 255
- 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,966
- - Although, you're forgetting one thing.
- - What?
- 256
- 00:13:37,160 --> 00:13:39,527
- You don't have a fucking choice.
- 257
- 00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:45,445
- KENNY: So now you're gonna become
- an even bigger drug dealer?
- 258
- 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:48,007
- Drug smuggler, Kenny.
- There's a difference.
- 259
- 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:54,001
- You're probably gonna get
- searched at the border.
- 260
- 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,722
- No offense, you look like
- a total drug dealer.
- 261
- 00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,605
- - No shit. Thanks, dude.
- - You could wear a disguise.
- 262
- 00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:01,605
- - What?
- - A disguise.
- 263
- 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,484
- That's what I thought. A disguise.
- 264
- 00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:06,684
- I dress up. What's the hot
- Halloween outfit these days?
- 265
- 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:09,611
- Bane from Batman? Someone like that?
- Wear something over my face?
- 266
- 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,565
- (AS BANE) There's no drugs in here.
- You've got nothing to worry about.
- 267
- 00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:13,920
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Great idea.
- 268
- 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:15,531
- (HORN HONKING)
- 269
- 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:18,326
- Hey, pardon me. Hi.
- 270
- 00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:23,162
- Hate to bug you, but I'm trying to get the
- fam to the zoo and I'm lost as all heck.
- 271
- 00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:24,930
- Fuck off, real-life Flanders.
- 272
- 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:30,242
- It's my fault. When it comes to reading
- maps, I sure can be an old flibbertigibbet.
- 273
- 00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:31,771
- (WOMAN CHUCKLES)
- 274
- 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,724
- Hey. No parking here, sir.
- 275
- 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:35,410
- Perfect. Fucking tourists.
- 276
- 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,041
- Oh, jeez. I'm awful sorry, officer.
- 277
- 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,163
- I don't know which way is up around here.
- 278
- 00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:43,011
- No problem.
- Our city can get confusing sometimes.
- 279
- 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:44,770
- MAN: Trying to find our way to the zoo.
- 280
- 00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:48,806
- It's two blocks up that way,
- take a left, two blocks...
- 281
- 00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:55,841
- Holy fucking shit.
- 282
- 00:14:57,760 --> 00:14:59,205
- Thank you, dickheads.
- 283
- 00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:03,449
- (OVER SPEAKERS)
- Hey little lady, don't you say maybe
- 284
- 00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:06,530
- Rose, the guy at the bar asked for you
- by name.
- 285
- 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,131
- Treat him nice.
- 286
- 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:10,561
- Baby, I'ma show you how to
- 287
- 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:11,881
- MAN: Yeah!
- 288
- 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:13,969
- Hi. I'm Rose.
- 289
- 00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:17,730
- - Hi. Hi.
- - What...? Oh, please. No.
- 290
- 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:19,968
- - No, Rose. Hey, Rose, Rose.
- - No, no, no, no.
- 291
- 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,527
- - Please. Listen to me.
- - Duh, duh, duh, duh.
- 292
- 00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:24,644
- Ch-ch-ch-chuh.
- 293
- 00:15:27,840 --> 00:15:29,330
- You asshole.
- 294
- 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,405
- Don't worry. You don't have
- to get naked and all that stuff.
- 295
- 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,931
- - Unless you want to, you know. Oof!
- - Mm-hm.
- 296
- 00:15:37,160 --> 00:15:38,400
- - Fuck.
- - What do you want?
- 297
- 00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:43,523
- How would you like to spend 4th of July
- weekend making 10 grand?
- 298
- 00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:44,801
- - What?
- - Rose, listen.
- 299
- 00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,725
- All I'm asking is that you
- go to Mexico with me.
- 300
- 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:51,125
- All right? And then we drive home together
- in an RV.
- 301
- 00:15:51,320 --> 00:15:52,401
- ROSE: Mm-hm.
- 302
- 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,080
- - And that RV has some pot in it.
- - Drug dealing?
- 303
- 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:58,045
- No, it's not drug dealing. It's not.
- No, it's smuggling.
- 304
- 00:15:58,240 --> 00:16:00,402
- - Are you out of your mind?
- - Rose, listen to me.
- 305
- 00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:05,322
- Now, me crossing the border by myself,
- huge red flag. Huge, all right?
- 306
- 00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:07,642
- But families,
- they don't get a second look.
- 307
- 00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:10,730
- So, Rose, I need you to be my wife.
- 308
- 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:13,882
- That is the dumbest thing
- I've ever heard.
- 309
- 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:17,641
- Look, Rose, 10,000 bucks,
- and your flight's already paid for.
- 310
- 00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:19,205
- You can't buy me.
- 311
- 00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:22,370
- I'm not buying you, all right?
- I'm renting you.
- 312
- 00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:23,607
- ROSE: Hmm.
- 313
- 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:25,006
- Like Pretty Woman.
- 314
- 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:28,043
- Pretty Woman?
- She was a prostitute.
- 315
- 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:29,924
- And I don't trust you.
- 316
- 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,171
- - What did she say?
- - What the fuck do you think? She said no.
- 317
- 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:41,331
- Cool. So I guess it's just us, then. A little
- father and son bonding trip to Mexico.
- 318
- 00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:45,485
- Are you kidding? You and me alone in a van?
- It'll look like the pervert Olympics.
- 319
- 00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:47,882
- No way. Absolutely not.
- No, we need a girl.
- 320
- 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:51,687
- And unless you can think of someone
- that can leave town tomorrow, I'm fucked.
- 321
- 00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:54,491
- I know a girl.
- 322
- 00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,288
- I don't get it. What's in it for me?
- 323
- 00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:04,690
- I'm thinking a roof over your head, some
- actual hot food. That'd be good enough.
- 324
- 00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:06,166
- I'm thinking 1000.
- 325
- 00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:09,682
- Fine, 1000 bucks, but that's it.
- 326
- 00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:14,130
- Great. And if we get caught I'll say you
- drugged and kidnapped me. Cool?
- 327
- 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,249
- Yeah, it's cool. Yeah, that's fine.
- But that's it.
- 328
- 00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:20,802
- Kenny, meet your new sister.
- 329
- 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:23,807
- This is great. I've always wanted a sister.
- 330
- 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:29,489
- - Get it off me. Get it off! Get off!
- - Hey, come on. Let go.
- 331
- 00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:32,411
- - Come on. We gotta clean you up.
- - What's wrong with you?
- 332
- 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:35,331
- - Don't say that.
- - I didn't mean to make her uncomfortable.
- 333
- 00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:36,646
- (OVER SPEAKERS) Wild child
- 334
- 00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:38,410
- MAN: Boner Garage!
- 335
- 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,171
- Going all out Going for broke
- 336
- 00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:45,607
- Oh, great. Rose, I'm glad I caught you.
- 337
- 00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:49,043
- I wanted to go over a couple
- of minor policy changes...
- 338
- 00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:52,050
- - ...that we have here at the club.
- - Like what?
- 339
- 00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:55,562
- TODD: Like, I want you to start having sex
- with the customers for money.
- 340
- 00:17:56,440 --> 00:17:59,569
- What? That's totally illegal, Todd.
- 341
- 00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:01,290
- Come on, what are you gonna do?
- 342
- 00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:06,088
- I gotta stay competitive with those
- fuckers who opened up across the street.
- 343
- 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:07,725
- You mean the Apple Store?
- 344
- 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,365
- Yeah, and they're killing us.
- 345
- 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:10,806
- Oh, God.
- 346
- 00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,970
- That's it. I can't do it. I quit.
- 347
- 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:15,886
- Did you hear the good news?
- 348
- 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:18,367
- Now we get to fuck the customers
- for money.
- 349
- 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,041
- - Wha...?
- - Boner Garage loves it.
- 350
- 00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:25,365
- I'm out of here. I am out of here.
- I quit.
- 351
- 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:36,686
- Fuck.
- 352
- 00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,366
- Fuck.
- 353
- 00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:41,326
- (SIGHS)
- 354
- 00:18:44,160 --> 00:18:45,889
- (GROANS)
- 355
- 00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:04,568
- So, Casey, I guess it's nice for you
- to get your hair cut.
- 356
- 00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:06,285
- Being homeless and all...
- 357
- 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:10,121
- I'm not homeless, fucktard. I have a home.
- But I left because my parent...
- 358
- 00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:14,564
- Shut up, okay? Please. I don't need
- to hear your hard-luck backstory right now.
- 359
- 00:19:14,760 --> 00:19:19,368
- I rented Precious on Netflix eight months
- ago and I still haven't watched the thing.
- 360
- 00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:20,641
- Here. You know what?
- 361
- 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:24,202
- Just give me a little peace and quiet
- and buy yourself some new clothes.
- 362
- 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:27,722
- You know, the kind of stuff that loved
- children wear. Not this garbage.
- 363
- 00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:29,445
- All right? Thank you.
- 364
- 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:30,841
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, stop.
- 365
- 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:34,608
- You're fine.
- You already like a total dipshit.
- 366
- 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:38,924
- Here. You're gonna need it.
- You look like Eminem from 8 Mile.
- 367
- 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:40,167
- (CHUCKLES)
- 368
- 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:42,528
- Go with her.
- Make sure she doesn't steal it.
- 369
- 00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:44,609
- And stay the fuck out of Hot Topic.
- 370
- 00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:46,400
- WOMAN: David Clark?
- 371
- 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,401
- Okay, what are we doing today?
- 372
- 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:52,570
- Yeah, I say,
- give me something that says:
- 373
- 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:56,970
- "I get up every morning at 5:30 and
- commute for an hour to a bullshit job...
- 374
- 00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,771
- ...where my boss expects me
- to kiss his balls all day...
- 375
- 00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:03,965
- ...so I can afford to keep my ungrateful
- kids decked out in Dora the Explorer shit...
- 376
- 00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:06,321
- ...and my wife up to her fat ass
- in self-help videos...
- 377
- 00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:09,285
- ...until the day I get the courage
- to put a shotgun in my mouth."
- 378
- 00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:10,930
- (MAN CLEARS THROAT)
- 379
- 00:20:11,800 --> 00:20:13,006
- Right here.
- 380
- 00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,843
- Yeah. That's it. That's the one.
- 381
- 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:48,201
- All right.
- 382
- 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,211
- Get a full body check.
- 383
- 00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:06,605
- (BEEPS)
- 384
- 00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:10,611
- (BEEPS)
- 385
- 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:21,925
- Sorry.
- 386
- 00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,808
- Hi, you folks have everything you need?
- 387
- 00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:27,406
- Oh, you betcha!
- 388
- 00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:31,685
- Yeah, we're heading out on a family vacay
- here, you know? Off to see grandma, huh?
- 389
- 00:21:32,440 --> 00:21:34,010
- Well, you have a lovely family.
- 390
- 00:21:34,200 --> 00:21:37,522
- Oh, thank you very much. Yeah, this
- is my son, Kenny Miller, right here.
- 391
- 00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:40,041
- - And my lovely daughter...
- - Casey?
- 392
- 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:43,369
- Casey. Casey Miller, that's right.
- And I'm David Miller.
- 393
- 00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:44,607
- We're the Millers.
- 394
- 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:48,646
- Yeah, now, you know, I got my hands
- full here. Couple of kooky teenagers.
- 395
- 00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:52,641
- Yeah, I'm going through all those
- typical teenage girl issues like:
- 396
- 00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:55,491
- Finals and college applications...
- 397
- 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:58,007
- ...and am I gonna get asked to prom.
- 398
- 00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:00,680
- Plus, I haven't gotten my period in
- two months...
- 399
- 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,924
- ...which is really weird because
- I've mostly just been doing anal.
- 400
- 00:22:04,120 --> 00:22:05,360
- (KENNY COUGHS)
- 401
- 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:08,484
- Ha-ha-ha! Oh, that's enough.
- 402
- 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,731
- Well, thank you for your help, "Natalie."
- 403
- 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:15,250
- Take your seats, please.
- 404
- 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:18,646
- You fucking kidding me?
- 405
- 00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:20,808
- ROSE: I'm good. I got it.
- Right over here. Thanks.
- 406
- 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,923
- Thank you. Sorry.
- 407
- 00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:27,569
- - Honey! Hi! You made it!
- - Mm-hm. Eat a dick.
- 408
- 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:29,285
- - Sorry, sorry. Okay.
- - Mm-mm.
- 409
- 00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:32,768
- - Wow, you look really, like...
- - Don't. Just don't, all right?
- 410
- 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:34,207
- Hi, Mom.
- 411
- 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:35,561
- - Jesus.
- DAVID: Mm-hm.
- 412
- 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,725
- And who's that?
- 413
- 00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:40,730
- Well, that's your daughter. Casey.
- 414
- 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:42,287
- Hey.
- 415
- 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:43,766
- ROSE: Mm-hm.
- 416
- 00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:45,286
- I want 30,000 now.
- 417
- 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,127
- - No fucking way.
- - Okay. Have a safe flight.
- 418
- 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,291
- What? No. Okay. Fine!
- Fine. Bloodsucker.
- 419
- 00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:56,405
- Mm. All right, happy wife,
- happy life. Hi, kids!
- 420
- 00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:59,927
- - Make room for your mother.
- - Okay.
- 421
- 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:04,364
- - Hey!
- - Whoa! No, I didn't...!
- 422
- 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,530
- What the fuck? Don't you ever think
- that you can ever...
- 423
- 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:10,007
- Family meeting. Let's go.
- Get in the back. Go.
- 424
- 00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:11,924
- KENNY: I didn't mean to.
- - I don't care.
- 425
- 00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:16,210
- CASEY: He just hit me in the fucking face.
- - Will you march? No one wants to hear...
- 426
- 00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:20,803
- (WHISPERING)
- What the fuck?! Are you kidding me?
- 427
- 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:23,447
- Oh, come on, relax, Dorothy. Jesus.
- 428
- 00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:26,211
- We're not at the border.
- Who cares what they think?
- 429
- 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:29,324
- It's about not drawing attention
- to ourselves, you little hobo.
- 430
- 00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:31,843
- Hey! Don't talk to her like that.
- 431
- 00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:35,120
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Rose, relax, okay?
- The only thing you need to worry about...
- 432
- 00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:37,971
- ...is making them think you could
- be someone's mother. Okay?
- 433
- 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,561
- Are you kidding me?
- I can do this shit in my sleep.
- 434
- 00:23:40,760 --> 00:23:42,091
- Excuse me.
- 435
- 00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:47,807
- Lord, we thank thee for the blessing
- of this family vacation.
- 436
- 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:50,560
- May David find his bliss
- and bring us home back safely.
- 437
- 00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:53,889
- May Kenny and Casey fortify
- their sibling bond...
- 438
- 00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:57,209
- ...over the warm glow
- of our devoted hearts.
- 439
- 00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:01,241
- And may this entire airplane
- find safe passage...
- 440
- 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,488
- ...and a bountiful life.
- 441
- 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:05,366
- Even the Jews.
- 442
- 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:08,210
- - Amen.
- DAVID: - That was a good one.
- 443
- 00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:09,890
- That was beautiful.
- 444
- 00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:12,367
- - Oh.
- - I wish my family was more like that.
- 445
- 00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:14,244
- ROSE: Oh, stop. Don't.
- 446
- 00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:17,887
- No, no, no. Come on. Come in here.
- Hug it out. Don't you cry.
- 447
- 00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:19,206
- Aw, honey.
- 448
- 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:21,571
- (MOUTHS) Fuck you.
- 449
- 00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:23,604
- All better now? Okay.
- 450
- 00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:27,925
- Oh, and don't forget you can use Chex Mix
- as a surprise casserole topping.
- 451
- 00:24:28,120 --> 00:24:29,929
- Adds that real special crunch.
- 452
- 00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:32,009
- - Wow, what a great tip.
- - Sure!
- 453
- 00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:33,366
- Bye-bye.
- 454
- 00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:36,288
- Holy shit, where did that come from?
- 455
- 00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:39,324
- It's five summers with my Aunt Barb
- in Oklahoma.
- 456
- 00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:40,601
- That was amazing.
- 457
- 00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:42,564
- Calm down. It wasn't that great.
- 458
- 00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:46,321
- Ah, goddamn it. Brad said the RV was
- supposed to be out here waiting for us.
- 459
- 00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:48,522
- Anybody sees a camper, just let me know.
- 460
- 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:50,207
- Whoa.
- 461
- 00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:02,884
- What the fuck is this?
- 462
- 00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:04,206
- This thing is ridiculous.
- 463
- 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:05,925
- (ENGINE STARTS)
- 464
- 00:25:06,120 --> 00:25:07,770
- - Can you drive this?
- - I don't know.
- 465
- 00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:09,371
- How fast does it go?
- 466
- 00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,048
- Why the hell are you reading that thing?
- 467
- 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,884
- Because I like it. It's fun.
- 468
- 00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:50,411
- It's informative.
- 469
- 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:52,523
- "It's fun." That's your idea of fun, huh?
- 470
- 00:25:52,720 --> 00:25:55,371
- I have a VCR manual from the '90s
- you should check out.
- 471
- 00:25:55,560 --> 00:25:58,325
- - I think you'd probably enjoy that.
- - Fireworks!
- 472
- 00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,045
- Oh, my God, guys, look!
- 473
- 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,851
- Fireworks! Hey! Fireworks!
- Pull over! There's fireworks!
- 474
- 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:04,684
- We're not pulling over for fireworks.
- 475
- 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,281
- - Oh, Oh, stern.
- - What? It's Fourth of July weekend.
- 476
- 00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:09,448
- Don't be such a grumpy asshole. Pull over!
- 477
- 00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:10,926
- No. Absolutely not.
- 478
- 00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:12,764
- Oh, come on, I vote fireworks too.
- 479
- 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,970
- See? Even this loser wants fireworks.
- Fireworks!
- 480
- 00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:18,481
- - Fireworks! Fireworks!
- - The kids wanna see fireworks.
- 481
- 00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:20,600
- CASEY & KENNY: Fireworks!
- Fireworks! Fireworks!
- 482
- 00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:21,846
- Okay, enough!
- 483
- 00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:28,767
- Enough!
- Let's get something straight right now!
- 484
- 00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:30,883
- You are not my kids! Okay?
- 485
- 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:33,647
- You are not my wife!
- And we are not a family!
- 486
- 00:26:33,840 --> 00:26:35,285
- All right? This is a job!
- 487
- 00:26:35,480 --> 00:26:37,005
- We are not the Brady Bunch!
- 488
- 00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:39,925
- I'm Marky Mark
- and y'all are the Funky Bunch!
- 489
- 00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:43,525
- - The what?
- - I'm the boss. You hear me?
- 490
- 00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:48,647
- So cut the shit! Otherwise, I will turn
- this RV around immediately!
- 491
- 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:52,487
- And we will drive straight home.
- No drugs for anyone!
- 492
- 00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:54,041
- This vacation sucks.
- 493
- 00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:55,605
- You...
- 494
- 00:26:56,120 --> 00:26:57,645
- It is not a vacation!
- 495
- 00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,041
- (ROSE LAUGHS)
- 496
- 00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:05,446
- (FIREWORK POPS)
- 497
- 00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:07,603
- There we go. You fucking happy? Come on.
- 498
- 00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:21,201
- DAVID: Here we go. Everybody
- just be cool. All right?
- 499
- 00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:23,486
- Hey there!
- 500
- 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:26,923
- You got the Miller family here,
- reporting for leisure, sir.
- 501
- 00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:29,401
- We're just heading down
- to México way to do a...
- 502
- 00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:35,888
- Oh. Okay. Great. Fantastic. All right,
- thank you. Take care, now. All right.
- 503
- 00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:41,488
- Whoo! Did you see that? I told you
- this RV would work! We totally blend.
- 504
- 00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:44,405
- ROSE: Congratulations. You
- just snuck into Mexico.
- 505
- 00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:51,527
- CASEY: What is this?
- 506
- 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,404
- - A meth lab?
- DAVID: - It's Mexico, Casey.
- 507
- 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:55,364
- ROSE: That's a donkey, donkey, donkey.
- 508
- 00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:59,088
- - This RV blends right in, David.
- DAVID: - Will you calm down?
- 509
- 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:02,404
- ROSE: This thing is ginormous.
- I mean, it's ridiculous.
- 510
- 00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:11,441
- NAVIGATION VOICE: You have
- arrived at your destination.
- 511
- 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:13,483
- The route guidance is now finished.
- 512
- 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:15,682
- Are you sure these guys are expecting you?
- 513
- 00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:17,604
- Rose, we're good. All right?
- 514
- 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:21,162
- Now will you calm down? These are
- Brad's guys. Nothing to worry about.
- 515
- 00:28:21,360 --> 00:28:22,964
- Open Sesame. Here we go.
- 516
- 00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:24,726
- Hey!
- 517
- 00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:27,408
- Hey, I think that guy was in La Bamba.
- 518
- 00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:31,124
- Is that a little football over there?
- That's fun. Soccer.
- 519
- 00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:32,845
- Kids are a good sign, I guess.
- 520
- 00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:40,641
- - Hey there.
- - What is this place?
- 521
- 00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:43,969
- DAVID: Will you look at this?
- It's a cute little drug-dealing community.
- 522
- 00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:45,804
- They probably sell churros.
- 523
- 00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:48,490
- Will you relax?
- 524
- 00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,842
- It's fine. We're totally fine.
- 525
- 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:55,250
- I'll run in, pick up a duffel bag, a suitcase
- or something and we'll be on our way.
- 526
- 00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:59,001
- Hi. Now come on.
- See, it's the welcome wagon.
- 527
- 00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:00,440
- Let me go talk to this guy.
- 528
- 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:05,121
- Hola. Hola, big man, me llamo David.
- 529
- 00:29:05,320 --> 00:29:07,641
- Yeah, I'm here to pick
- up for Brad Gurdlinger.
- 530
- 00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:10,846
- - Oh.
- - He's got a gun.
- 531
- 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,247
- ROSE: - Oh, God.
- - Whoa, whoa. Hey, hey, hey!
- 532
- 00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:16,927
- - Oh, God.
- DAVID: - Palo Hacon! Palo Hacon!
- 533
- 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,485
- Pablo Chacon?
- 534
- 00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:20,687
- (SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 535
- 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,406
- Pablo Chacon. I'm here to pick up
- for Pablo Chacon.
- 536
- 00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:25,921
- You are the White Gringo
- with the haircut of a donkey.
- 537
- 00:29:26,120 --> 00:29:27,929
- Uh, yeah. SÃ.
- 538
- 00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:31,721
- Yeah. Yeah, mucho white-o.
- Very, very gringo. Yeah.
- 539
- 00:29:31,920 --> 00:29:35,766
- - Who are they?
- - Um, that's my "family."
- 540
- 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,162
- You know, uh, mi familia.
- 541
- 00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:41,409
- You know, helping me out here
- with the deal. Yeah.
- 542
- 00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:43,602
- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
- 543
- 00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:45,205
- Yeah.
- 544
- 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:47,846
- Yeah. I know, I can't believe it either.
- 545
- 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:49,121
- (ONE-EYE SHOUTS IN SPANISH)
- 546
- 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:50,920
- (MOUTHS)
- Do you see his eye? Jesus Christ.
- 547
- 00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:52,764
- (LAUGHING)
- 548
- 00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,689
- Come! Drugs now.
- 549
- 00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:56,689
- DAVID: - Okay, great.
- - What?
- 550
- 00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:58,530
- DAVID: That's great. Let's do it. Okay.
- 551
- 00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:03,607
- All right, big fella, where's the smidge
- of weed everyone's talking about?
- 552
- 00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:10,930
- (MEN CHATTERING)
- 553
- 00:30:15,320 --> 00:30:18,085
- - This is a little more than a smidge.
- - Oh, dear.
- 554
- 00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:19,964
- Calm down. Okay?
- We're gonna be fine.
- 555
- 00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:21,571
- Oh, yeah, sure, right.
- 556
- 00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:24,684
- All we're doing is smuggling
- two metric tons of marijuana...
- 557
- 00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:28,208
- ...across an international border
- in a rented motor home!
- 558
- 00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,451
- I don't see what could possibly go wrong!
- Ugh!
- 559
- 00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:35,850
- Okay, uh, I'm gonna
- make a phone call real quick.
- 560
- 00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,607
- Kenny, watch the pot.
- 561
- 00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:45,921
- It's a great place.
- 562
- 00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:47,851
- Fuck you.
- 563
- 00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:51,040
- (SAW WHIRRING)
- 564
- 00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:53,607
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- 565
- 00:30:59,000 --> 00:31:00,445
- BRAD: Hey. Buddy.
- 566
- 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:04,241
- I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.
- I'm like an amazing sculptor.
- 567
- 00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:07,006
- - What are you talking about?
- - I've been working all day.
- 568
- 00:31:07,160 --> 00:31:11,609
- It's an orca and he's breaching
- and I'm balls deep in his blow hole.
- 569
- 00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:12,847
- What the fuck?
- 570
- 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:14,087
- Uh-oh, something wrong?
- 571
- 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:16,891
- Yeah! Something's wrong.
- Something's very, very wrong. Okay?
- 572
- 00:31:17,040 --> 00:31:18,371
- You said "a smidge of pot."
- 573
- 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:20,130
- This is not a smidge.
- 574
- 00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:21,770
- - Smidge and a half? No?
- - No.
- 575
- 00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:25,129
- You got me moving enough weed
- to kill Willie-fucking-Nelson, man!
- 576
- 00:31:26,160 --> 00:31:30,324
- Okay? They're using a goddamn bucket
- brigade to put it on the RV as we speak!
- 577
- 00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:34,201
- You walked in, told them you were picking
- up for Pablo Chacon and they were like:
- 578
- 00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:36,170
- - "No problem!"
- - Wait a minute.
- 579
- 00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:39,403
- Why do you sound surprised?
- You told them we were coming, right?
- 580
- 00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:40,607
- Relax!
- 581
- 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:44,810
- Everything's gonna be fine, man. I greased
- the guard in lane one at the border.
- 582
- 00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:47,731
- He'll let you breeze through,
- I'll see you in the morning!
- 583
- 00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:49,251
- I'll even buy you brunch.
- 584
- 00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:51,284
- Can I change the subject for a second?
- 585
- 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:53,283
- If you get back and see the sculpture...
- 586
- 00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:56,603
- ...you're gonna look at it and be like,
- "Whoa, those balls are huge."
- 587
- 00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:59,445
- The balls are the only part
- that are not anatomically correct.
- 588
- 00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:01,130
- Everything else is perfect.
- 589
- 00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:05,444
- But I made the balls a little larger
- as a tribute to my manhood.
- 590
- 00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:06,761
- Fuck you, Brad.
- 591
- 00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:08,888
- That's the David I love!
- 592
- 00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,611
- Fuck you too! Come on, let's do this!
- 593
- 00:32:11,760 --> 00:32:13,603
- Ha, ha! I'll see you soon,
- my little drug mule!
- 594
- 00:32:13,760 --> 00:32:15,250
- Hee-haw! Hee-haw! Hee-haw...
- 595
- 00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:16,561
- (PHONE BEEPS OFF)
- 596
- 00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:17,721
- Shit!
- 597
- 00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:22,207
- (WOMAN SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 598
- 00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:24,721
- Oh, no. Thank you. I'm good.
- 599
- 00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:27,845
- You reject my mother's gift?
- 600
- 00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:31,931
- I mean, I don't know
- whether I'd put it in those terms.
- 601
- 00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:34,122
- - Shut up and take the fruit.
- - Right. Got it.
- 602
- 00:32:34,320 --> 00:32:35,446
- Thank you, ma'am.
- 603
- 00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:37,489
- (WHISPERS) - You wanna get us killed?
- - What?
- 604
- 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:39,401
- Namaste.
- 605
- 00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:48,881
- CASEY: Whoa.
- 606
- 00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,287
- I think Snoop Dogg would fuck this fridge.
- 607
- 00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:52,851
- At least it keeps it fresh.
- 608
- 00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:57,441
- Well, as long as no one sets foot
- inside the RV...
- 609
- 00:32:57,640 --> 00:33:00,484
- ...looks through a window,
- or weighs us...
- 610
- 00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:04,171
- - ...we should be pretty good.
- - We'll be fine.
- 611
- 00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:06,250
- We're totally fucked.
- 612
- 00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,642
- (ONE-EYE SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 613
- 00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:22,326
- (SIREN WHOOPS)
- 614
- 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:25,369
- DAVID: Aw, shit. What the hell is this?
- 615
- 00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:28,080
- ROSE: What's it look like? It's a cop, genius.
- DAVID: Be cool.
- 616
- 00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:31,887
- - Remember we're the Millers. Okay.
- - Okay. Yeah. Okay. Cool.
- 617
- 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:35,487
- - Oh. Buenos dias, officer.
- - Hola.
- 618
- 00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:38,445
- I'm sorry if we were violating
- some of your traffic laws.
- 619
- 00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,883
- You see, the family and I got into
- a heated game of road bingo and...
- 620
- 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:44,122
- - Cut the shit.
- - I'm sorry?
- 621
- 00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:46,846
- I saw you leaving
- Pablo Chacon's compound.
- 622
- 00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:50,084
- And we both know if I search
- your mobile home, what I'd find.
- 623
- 00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,282
- Much prison time for such things.
- 624
- 00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:53,811
- Yeah. Yeah.
- 625
- 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:56,242
- But I don't feel like arresting anybody...
- 626
- 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:59,762
- ...so I'll just simply take my bribe
- and I'll be on my way.
- 627
- 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:04,083
- Well, all right. Ha, ha.
- 628
- 00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,769
- This is what I'm talking about.
- Great! How much we talking? 100? 200?
- 629
- 00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:10,201
- - One thousand.
- - A thousand?
- 630
- 00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:13,125
- - Mm-hm.
- - What, are you buying a house down here?
- 631
- 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:17,925
- It's a lot. Um, we don't have
- that sort of cash on us right now.
- 632
- 00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:19,406
- (GROANS)
- 633
- 00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:22,003
- You see, that's gonna be a problem.
- 634
- 00:34:22,240 --> 00:34:23,366
- Yeah, yeah.
- 635
- 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:26,928
- Maybe you can offer me
- something else. Say, uh...
- 636
- 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,328
- ...something a little more personal?
- 637
- 00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,401
- - Oh.
- - Oh.
- 638
- 00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:38,127
- I gotcha. Rose, suck his dick.
- 639
- 00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:41,442
- Fuck you, I'm not sucking anything.
- 640
- 00:34:41,680 --> 00:34:43,409
- Come on. Will you be a team player?
- 641
- 00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:46,246
- - Are you fucking kidding me?
- - Will you stop being selfish?
- 642
- 00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:48,761
- Please, please, señora.
- No need to be alarmed.
- 643
- 00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:54,247
- See, I'm, how you say, a man who
- prefers the company of other men.
- 644
- 00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:56,889
- - Oh.
- - Oh.
- 645
- 00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:00,727
- - David, suck his dick.
- - Rose.
- 646
- 00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:03,446
- Five seconds tops. Just cradle the balls.
- 647
- 00:35:03,640 --> 00:35:05,005
- Mm.
- 648
- 00:35:05,240 --> 00:35:08,244
- Come on, David. Be a team player.
- You're gonna have fun.
- 649
- 00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:11,650
- Um...
- 650
- 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:15,045
- Okay. Kenny! Front and center, buddy.
- 651
- 00:35:15,240 --> 00:35:16,890
- Uh...
- 652
- 00:35:17,080 --> 00:35:18,360
- KENNY: Okay, so what's the plan?
- 653
- 00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:21,330
- Go up there and pretend to
- and then you're gonna jump him?
- 654
- 00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:22,806
- The plan is, um...
- 655
- 00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:24,240
- Here. Come here, come here.
- 656
- 00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,689
- Okay, um, let's see.
- You, you're this bottle cap.
- 657
- 00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:30,690
- Right? And I am this cigarette butt.
- 658
- 00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:34,601
- Okay, that's us. All right? Okay?
- He's over there, right by this, that bush.
- 659
- 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:36,006
- We'll make him the pebble.
- 660
- 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:39,886
- You will go and meet him behind
- the bush right over there.
- 661
- 00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:42,128
- You suck his dick,
- and we get outta here.
- 662
- 00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:44,840
- - Okay? Bring it in, on three.
- - What?! No!
- 663
- 00:35:45,040 --> 00:35:46,724
- What do you mean no? What's wrong?
- 664
- 00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:49,605
- - Well, I'm not gay.
- - Are you sure?
- 665
- 00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:52,682
- I mean, you never really know
- until you know.
- 666
- 00:35:52,920 --> 00:35:55,287
- - No. I'm not gay.
- - Okay. All right. Calm down.
- 667
- 00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:59,485
- Look, this gay panic situation you're having
- now, it's coming off a little homophobic.
- 668
- 00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:02,401
- What, because I don't want
- a penis in my mouth?
- 669
- 00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:05,046
- Exactly. It's exactly
- what homophobic means.
- 670
- 00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:08,847
- Look, you go over there, you just,
- you know, you pretend it's a girl's dick.
- 671
- 00:36:09,240 --> 00:36:10,605
- Any girl's dick you want.
- 672
- 00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,565
- KENNY: - I'm not sure I agree with that logic.
- - Look, listen to me.
- 673
- 00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,171
- - What is he saying to him?
- - I have no idea.
- 674
- 00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,402
- All right? Just listen to me. All right?
- 675
- 00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,726
- Come on, man.
- 676
- 00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:23,321
- This is your chance to be the hero.
- 677
- 00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:26,847
- - I don't know, David.
- DAVID: - Don't do it for me.
- 678
- 00:36:27,040 --> 00:36:30,442
- Don't even do it for you.
- Do it for the girls. For Rose and Casey.
- 679
- 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,689
- Because, believe me, they won't last
- two days in a Mexican prison.
- 680
- 00:36:36,240 --> 00:36:37,844
- - Okay.
- - Attaboy!
- 681
- 00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:41,128
- - I'll do it for the girls.
- - I'm proud of you.
- 682
- 00:36:42,040 --> 00:36:44,088
- Hey. What's going on?
- 683
- 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:46,851
- Somebody sucking my dick,
- or am I getting 1000 pesos?
- 684
- 00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:48,610
- No, he's gonna w...
- 685
- 00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:51,806
- - "Pesos"? Why didn't you say so?
- - Mm-hm. A thousand.
- 686
- 00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:55,083
- Oh, well, that's like, what, 80 bucks
- American?
- 687
- 00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:57,601
- Here. Here you go.
- A hundred. Keep the change.
- 688
- 00:36:57,800 --> 00:36:59,040
- (SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 689
- 00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:08,049
- Can't believe you were gonna suck
- that guy's dick. Come on, let's go.
- 690
- 00:37:14,400 --> 00:37:15,970
- (DOGS BARKING)
- 691
- 00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,688
- MAN: (ON PA) All vehicles, please proceed
- slowly in assigned lanes...
- 692
- 00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:24,649
- ...and prepare for vehicle inspection.
- 693
- 00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:27,451
- (MAN ON PA SPEAKING IN SPANISH)
- 694
- 00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:29,011
- Okay, here we go. This is it.
- 695
- 00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:30,645
- Kenny, grab the hats. Hurry.
- 696
- 00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:33,646
- You said the guard was just
- gonna wave us through.
- 697
- 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:37,242
- He will. But let's look the part so
- the others don't get suspicious.
- 698
- 00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:41,930
- (HORN HONKING)
- 699
- 00:37:44,240 --> 00:37:45,730
- What the fuck does this guy want?
- 700
- 00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:47,649
- I don't know. But he's honking.
- 701
- 00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:50,920
- - Hi!
- - Just ignore them.
- 702
- 00:37:51,320 --> 00:37:55,689
- Okay, he's really honking and it's making a huge scene.
- I think he just wants to say hi.
- 703
- 00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:57,450
- Oh, my God. I don't wanna say hi.
- 704
- 00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:59,927
- They're just waving. If we just wave,
- he'll stop.
- 705
- 00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:01,849
- Fine. I'll say hi. Fine.
- 706
- 00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:03,687
- - Hi!
- - Hi!
- 707
- 00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,969
- Howdy-doody! Quite a rig you got there,
- amigo.
- 708
- 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:11,290
- That is quite a rig
- you guys have there too.
- 709
- 00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:13,960
- Well, thank you very kindly.
- We do love her.
- 710
- 00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:17,323
- We don't take her out as often as
- we used to when our girl was small.
- 711
- 00:38:17,680 --> 00:38:22,288
- It can be such a bear to carve out quality
- family time but you gotta do it, don't you?
- 712
- 00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:24,608
- Yeah, David and Rose Miller here.
- 713
- 00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:25,926
- Oh.
- 714
- 00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:29,806
- This is my daughter, Casey, right here.
- And my son, Kenny.
- 715
- 00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:33,371
- - How handsome.
- - Pleased to make your acquaintance.
- 716
- 00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:36,245
- Don Fitzgerald,
- my smoldering wife, Edith...
- 717
- 00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:38,249
- ...and our daughter. Say hi, Melissa.
- 718
- 00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:48,244
- (EDIE LAUGHS)
- 719
- 00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:51,120
- MAN: (ON PA) Lane one, please pull forward.
- - Oh.
- 720
- 00:38:51,240 --> 00:38:53,686
- Sir. Sir, please pull forward.
- 721
- 00:38:56,920 --> 00:38:58,206
- I got a joint here.
- 722
- 00:38:59,240 --> 00:39:01,322
- - Shut down lane one.
- - It's medicinal.
- 723
- 00:39:01,560 --> 00:39:03,005
- - What'd he say?
- - He has a joint.
- 724
- 00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:04,645
- That's it?
- 725
- 00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:06,886
- (ROSE GASPS)
- 726
- 00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:08,887
- - Hide it.
- - Okay.
- 727
- 00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:10,844
- Get rid of it! Oh, my God!
- 728
- 00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:12,485
- Holy shit.
- 729
- 00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:14,843
- - Oh, that was so close.
- - You have a baby!
- 730
- 00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:18,011
- - Oh, I love babies!
- ROSE: - Oh.
- 731
- 00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:20,771
- Oh, look at that gorgeous
- little bundle of joy!
- 732
- 00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:23,128
- What's that beautiful little baby's name?
- 733
- 00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:27,043
- - This is our little...
- - LeBron.
- 734
- 00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:29,010
- - Name's LeBron.
- ROSE: - Yup.
- 735
- 00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,487
- - Oh.
- - A little French fella.
- 736
- 00:39:31,720 --> 00:39:32,767
- It's our little LeBron.
- 737
- 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,407
- I was against the name at first, but
- the missus has a real soft spot...
- 738
- 00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:38,760
- ...for prima donnas who'll never
- be as good as Jordan.
- 739
- 00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:40,405
- I can't see the face.
- 740
- 00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:45,005
- - I'm dying to see his face.
- - Sir, pull forward to lane two.
- 741
- 00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:48,489
- - Oh, fuck! Okay, put on the hats.
- - You gotta pull over.
- 742
- 00:39:48,680 --> 00:39:51,081
- - Here we go.
- ROSE: - Great.
- 743
- 00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:55,331
- - My God, I feel like a fucking idiot.
- - That's the idea.
- 744
- 00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:59,889
- Hey, hey, hey, hey. Everybody smile
- and follow my lead, all right?
- 745
- 00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:03,010
- I'm gonna take us to the promised land.
- Here we go. Here we go.
- 746
- 00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:04,929
- (DOG BARKING)
- 747
- 00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:06,485
- Steady.
- 748
- 00:40:07,120 --> 00:40:09,202
- - Steady.
- - Shit.
- 749
- 00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:17,289
- DAVID: Shh. Shh, shh. I got this one.
- 750
- 00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:22,646
- Okay. Everybody just smile. Everybody
- be cool. Here we go. Follow my lead. Ahem.
- 751
- 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:26,921
- You bringing anything
- into the United States, sir?
- 752
- 00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:28,360
- Yuh...
- 753
- 00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,571
- Sir, are you bringing any contraband
- back into the United States?
- 754
- 00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:32,807
- DAVID: Um...
- 755
- 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:34,240
- GUARD 1: - Sir?
- - David!
- 756
- 00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:35,521
- (GUARD 1 SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 757
- 00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:37,250
- (BARKING)
- 758
- 00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:41,525
- Folks, I need you to pull over and exit the
- vehicle, please.
- 759
- 00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,847
- - But...
- - Sir, is that actually necessary?
- 760
- 00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:47,208
- I mean, these kids
- are pooped and we've just...
- 761
- 00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:50,290
- I need everybody out of this
- recreational vehicle immediately.
- 762
- 00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,131
- - I'll just put the baby down.
- - We'll put the baby away.
- 763
- 00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:58,406
- Bring the child, pull over to the secondary
- inspection area and exit the vehicle now!
- 764
- 00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:00,965
- - Okay.
- - Good.
- 765
- 00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:02,571
- (BARKING)
- 766
- 00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:04,364
- (ROSE GASPS)
- 767
- 00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:05,840
- It's okay. It's all right.
- 768
- 00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:07,923
- It's okay, baby. It's just a puppy.
- 769
- 00:41:08,720 --> 00:41:09,960
- Stand down.
- 770
- 00:41:11,040 --> 00:41:13,042
- All right. It's okay.
- 771
- 00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:17,601
- Before I search the vehicle, is there
- anything you wanna tell me about?
- 772
- 00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:19,370
- Because after I open that door...
- 773
- 00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:21,440
- ...I can't help you.
- 774
- 00:41:27,240 --> 00:41:30,722
- Last chance. I'm gonna search this vehicle
- top to bottom.
- 775
- 00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:32,487
- All right.
- 776
- 00:41:32,880 --> 00:41:35,326
- (MEN SHOUTING IN SPANISH)
- 777
- 00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:36,681
- We got runners!
- 778
- 00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:38,723
- (DOGS BARKING)
- 779
- 00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:41,730
- (GUNSHOTS)
- 780
- 00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:43,684
- GUARD 2: We got runners!
- 781
- 00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:47,165
- Sorry to inconvenience you, folks.
- This happens a lot.
- 782
- 00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:48,771
- You have a nice day.
- 783
- 00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:56,448
- Go. Go, go!
- 784
- 00:42:12,920 --> 00:42:14,968
- Ah. Well, that was fucking easy!
- 785
- 00:42:15,160 --> 00:42:16,321
- (DAVID LAUGHS)
- 786
- 00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:18,010
- - Oh, my God.
- - God!
- 787
- 00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:19,247
- Whoo! We did it!
- 788
- 00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:23,002
- Nicely done, Millers! Give it up!
- Very good job. Here you go.
- 789
- 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,806
- Rose! Yeah! David! There you go!
- 790
- 00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:30,483
- We are all officially international drug
- smugglers. Add it to the resume.
- 791
- 00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:33,524
- Ha, ha.
- How about a little victory music, huh?
- 792
- 00:42:35,040 --> 00:42:37,646
- (TLC'S "WATERFALLS"
- PLAYING ON RADIO)
- 793
- 00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:38,921
- Oh, no, no, no.
- 794
- 00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:41,407
- - Don't change it. I love this song.
- - Me too.
- 795
- 00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:44,126
- What? I didn't even like this song
- when it was popular.
- 796
- 00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:45,731
- Come on, loosen up, David.
- 797
- 00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:48,002
- (INCREASES VOLUME)
- 798
- 00:42:48,200 --> 00:42:50,407
- (SINGING ALONG)
- Please stick to the rivers
- 799
- 00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:52,762
- And the lakes that you're used to
- 800
- 00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:54,047
- Don't do this.
- 801
- 00:42:54,240 --> 00:42:57,608
- What? This isn't even
- a good victory song.
- 802
- 00:42:57,840 --> 00:42:59,842
- No, stop. We are not doing this.
- 803
- 00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:03,169
- This is embarrassing. Stop.
- 804
- 00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:05,726
- Ah, come on.
- 805
- 00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:10,009
- (RAPPING) I seen a rainbow yesterday
- But too many storms have come and gone
- 806
- 00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,407
- Leavin' a trace of not one God-given ray
- Is it because my life is 10 shades of gray
- 807
- 00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:13,647
- (MOUTHS) What the fuck?
- 808
- 00:43:14,520 --> 00:43:17,603
- I pray all 10 fade away
- Seldom praise him for the sunny days
- 809
- 00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:19,689
- You claim the insane
- And name this place in time
- 810
- 00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:23,282
- For fallin' prey to crime, I swear
- The system got you victim to your own mind
- 811
- 00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:26,484
- Dreams are hopeless aspirations
- In hopes of comin' true
- 812
- 00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:28,728
- Believe in yourself
- The rest is up to me and
- 813
- 00:43:28,920 --> 00:43:31,651
- (SINGING)
- Don't go chasin' waterfalls
- 814
- 00:43:31,840 --> 00:43:34,286
- - Whoo!
- CASEY: - Whoo, yeah, Kenny!
- 815
- 00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,050
- ROSE: Where did you learn to do that?
- 816
- 00:43:36,240 --> 00:43:37,685
- DAVID: Yeah, whatever.
- 817
- 00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:41,488
- (CHILDREN CHATTERING)
- 818
- 00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,967
- (CROWD SHOUTING)
- 819
- 00:43:50,160 --> 00:43:51,525
- (GROANS)
- 820
- 00:43:58,440 --> 00:44:00,522
- (CROWD MURMURING)
- 821
- 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:02,847
- Señor Chacon.
- 822
- 00:44:03,040 --> 00:44:04,610
- (ONE-EYE SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 823
- 00:44:04,800 --> 00:44:06,529
- We were not expecting you.
- 824
- 00:44:06,720 --> 00:44:10,645
- I decided to bring the gringo myself
- to make sure everything goes as planned.
- 825
- 00:44:10,840 --> 00:44:14,925
- But the gringo has already left with the
- shipment, señor.
- 826
- 00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:16,281
- What gringo?
- 827
- 00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:18,448
- The gringo with the haircut of a donkey.
- 828
- 00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:21,727
- You mean this gringo
- with the haircut of a donkey.
- 829
- 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,000
- I have failed you, señor.
- 830
- 00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:26,726
- If you saw this gringo again would you
- recognize him?
- 831
- 00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:29,924
- He was driving an RV with his family.
- 832
- 00:44:30,280 --> 00:44:31,691
- Get in the car.
- 833
- 00:44:53,720 --> 00:44:55,688
- Oh, how fast are you going?
- 834
- 00:44:56,640 --> 00:44:59,564
- Calm down, I'm going the speed limit.
- We won't get pulled over.
- 835
- 00:44:59,800 --> 00:45:03,600
- No, no. I mean, loaded down like this
- in a 15-ton vehicle...
- 836
- 00:45:03,840 --> 00:45:06,161
- ...going up a 10 percent grade.
- 837
- 00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:10,890
- Just use your head, David.
- I don't think you think things through.
- 838
- 00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:14,562
- - What?
- - Weight distribution loading and towing.
- 839
- 00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:15,921
- - See?
- - Yeah, I do.
- 840
- 00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:17,451
- I thought this plan through.
- 841
- 00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:19,881
- - Seems to be working out.
- - Oh, great.
- 842
- 00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:21,844
- (ALARM BEEPING)
- 843
- 00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:23,485
- DAVID: Oh, Shit!
- 844
- 00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:25,569
- (ENGINE SPUTTERING)
- 845
- 00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:27,524
- Seriously. God...!
- 846
- 00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:37,088
- Was this part of your plan, David?
- 847
- 00:45:37,280 --> 00:45:38,361
- Damn it.
- 848
- 00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:41,570
- - Wait, what are we gonna do now?
- - I don't kno...
- 849
- 00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:43,040
- I can't even get a signal.
- 850
- 00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,491
- No shit. We're in the fucking middle of
- nowhere, dude.
- 851
- 00:45:46,720 --> 00:45:48,370
- Oh, gee, thank you, Casey.
- 852
- 00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:51,166
- Thank you for your amazing problem
- solving skills. So helpful.
- 853
- 00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:52,646
- Whoa. Hey, what are you doing?
- 854
- 00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:56,287
- I'm not gonna stand on the side of the
- road next to an RV filled with pot.
- 855
- 00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:57,806
- I'm gonna try to find help.
- 856
- 00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:01,163
- - Yeah, fuck this. I'm going with her. Bye.
- - What?
- 857
- 00:46:01,400 --> 00:46:04,006
- CASEY: Wait up!
- ROSE: Ugh. Ridiculous!
- 858
- 00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:08,247
- Okay. Actually, that's fine. Good idea.
- Okay, hurry back though, please.
- 859
- 00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:11,887
- "Oh, I have a plan." Really? Good plan.
- You don't have any plans.
- 860
- 00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:15,806
- Women, am I right?
- 861
- 00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:18,530
- Shut the fuck up, Kenny.
- 862
- 00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:24,401
- ROSE: And he's so smug. Ugh.
- He drives me crazy.
- 863
- 00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:25,931
- CASEY: Well, yeah, he's an idiot.
- 864
- 00:46:26,120 --> 00:46:28,487
- ROSE: No, he's not an idiot.
- He's actually kind of smart.
- 865
- 00:46:28,720 --> 00:46:29,926
- Why are you defending him?
- 866
- 00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,327
- I'm not defending him.
- I'm just saying that he...
- 867
- 00:46:32,520 --> 00:46:36,286
- CASEY: Have you seen where we are?
- This whole plan is so stupid.
- 868
- 00:46:36,520 --> 00:46:37,646
- ROSE: Oh, really?
- 869
- 00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:41,128
- What golden advice did you follow that
- ended with you on the streets?
- 870
- 00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:44,648
- I don't live on the streets, okay?
- I crash with friends.
- 871
- 00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:46,922
- Ah. Okay. I see.
- 872
- 00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:49,885
- So you were kind of between
- couches when David and Kenny found you.
- 873
- 00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:52,242
- Are you gonna lecture me?
- Seriously, I'll puke.
- 874
- 00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:54,169
- You know what, I'm not lecturing you.
- 875
- 00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:57,011
- Okay, good. Because I don't
- need advice from a stripper.
- 876
- 00:46:57,200 --> 00:46:58,770
- All right, you know what you little shit?
- I swear...
- 877
- 00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:00,161
- (HORN HONKS)
- 878
- 00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:01,771
- What the hell is this?
- 879
- 00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:05,970
- Well, look at this
- cute little couple of hitchhikers.
- 880
- 00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:07,571
- We're here to save your bacon.
- 881
- 00:47:07,800 --> 00:47:10,246
- Saddle up, little ladies. Ha-ha-ha!
- 882
- 00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:12,442
- ROSE: Hey. Hi, what's going on?
- 883
- 00:47:12,680 --> 00:47:16,241
- They pulled up right after you guys left.
- They're gonna tow us to a mechanic.
- 884
- 00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:18,363
- They keeping asking to hold
- the weed baby.
- 885
- 00:47:18,600 --> 00:47:20,921
- All right, all right, calm down. Okay.
- 886
- 00:47:21,120 --> 00:47:24,602
- Just calm down, all right? I got this.
- Watch.
- 887
- 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:27,443
- I'm holding that baby.
- 888
- 00:47:27,640 --> 00:47:30,769
- Edie, you will, I promise,
- but it's nap time for LeBron.
- 889
- 00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:32,041
- Come on, guys, let's go.
- 890
- 00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:35,409
- All aboard the Fitzgerald Express.
- Honk, honk!
- 891
- 00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:38,080
- ROSE: - Ha-ha-ha!
- - Toot, toot!
- 892
- 00:47:39,120 --> 00:47:41,566
- It's like we're pretending it's a train,
- but it's not.
- 893
- 00:47:41,760 --> 00:47:43,603
- (EDIE LAUGHS)
- 894
- 00:47:49,040 --> 00:47:50,530
- KENNY: Surrounded by goblins.
- MELISSA: Okay.
- 895
- 00:47:50,760 --> 00:47:51,966
- Oh, Oh, Oh!
- 896
- 00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:54,766
- One more sec, okay? Hold on,
- one second. Don't freak.
- 897
- 00:47:54,960 --> 00:47:56,680
- EDIE: When you're a synchronized swimmer...
- 898
- 00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,081
- ...you can't use a maxi pad,
- you can see it.
- 899
- 00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:01,123
- So my friend bought me a box of tampins.
- 900
- 00:48:01,320 --> 00:48:03,846
- And I'll tell you, I had
- a hard time inserting those.
- 901
- 00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:06,122
- - It would just stick halfway out.
- ROSE: - Mm-hm.
- 902
- 00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:08,280
- - It was just like a Roman candle.
- ROSE: - Mm-hm.
- 903
- 00:48:08,440 --> 00:48:11,569
- And that is how I found out
- I was born with a shallow vagina.
- 904
- 00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:17,570
- - That was such a detailed story, Edie.
- - Thank you!
- 905
- 00:48:17,760 --> 00:48:22,448
- You gotta do a one-woman show.
- It's, like, so many layers, you know?
- 906
- 00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:25,687
- So, what's your story, David?
- 907
- 00:48:25,920 --> 00:48:27,729
- - What do you mean?
- - How'd you two meet?
- 908
- 00:48:27,960 --> 00:48:30,486
- Ah! Honey, tell her.
- 909
- 00:48:30,680 --> 00:48:33,251
- And don't leave out
- any of the romantic parts.
- 910
- 00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:34,931
- DAVID: Okay. All right.
- 911
- 00:48:35,120 --> 00:48:37,248
- Where did we first meet. Um...
- 912
- 00:48:37,440 --> 00:48:38,805
- It's great.
- 913
- 00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:42,641
- Well, that would have been when Rose
- moved into my apartment building.
- 914
- 00:48:42,840 --> 00:48:44,683
- - Ah. That's right.
- DAVID: - Mm-hm.
- 915
- 00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:46,086
- (GASPS)
- 916
- 00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:49,443
- I remember watching her through the
- crack in my door as she was...
- 917
- 00:48:49,640 --> 00:48:50,926
- Wait, you were spying on me?
- 918
- 00:48:51,120 --> 00:48:53,885
- Now, hon, just because you've heard it
- a thousand times...
- 919
- 00:48:54,080 --> 00:48:56,287
- ...doesn't mean you should interrupt.
- Don't be rude.
- 920
- 00:48:56,840 --> 00:48:59,002
- All right. Proceed.
- 921
- 00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:01,410
- But, yeah, I was spying on her.
- 922
- 00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:03,967
- She was unloading this U-Haul
- all by herself.
- 923
- 00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:08,485
- I wanna go help her, but I don't wanna come
- off like I'm hitting on her, because...
- 924
- 00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:11,924
- ...you know, I'd like to hit on her
- maybe at some point.
- 925
- 00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:15,282
- And, uh...
- 926
- 00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:20,884
- ...she was wearing these little navy
- blue Chuck Taylors and these jean shorts.
- 927
- 00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:23,606
- No pockets on the back,
- however that happened.
- 928
- 00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:27,043
- And this, uh, Tom Waits T-shirt.
- 929
- 00:49:27,240 --> 00:49:28,969
- I was like, "Oh, that's cool."
- 930
- 00:49:29,160 --> 00:49:30,685
- Because I love Tom Waits.
- 931
- 00:49:30,880 --> 00:49:32,803
- And she just looked beautiful.
- 932
- 00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:40,002
- If you're into that kind of mean,
- pretty thing.
- 933
- 00:49:42,560 --> 00:49:43,607
- So, anyway, uh...
- 934
- 00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:48,488
- ...she starts to bring up this really big
- weird-looking painting up the stairs.
- 935
- 00:49:48,680 --> 00:49:52,526
- And I'm like, "Okay, here's my shot."
- All right, so I go outside...
- 936
- 00:49:52,720 --> 00:49:56,042
- ...and I help her with it.
- I'm trying to, at least.
- 937
- 00:49:56,240 --> 00:49:57,969
- She looks at me and goes: "Stop it!"
- 938
- 00:49:58,160 --> 00:50:00,527
- - She just snaps at me.
- - You started yanking at it.
- 939
- 00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:02,683
- Next thing you know, it's a tug of war...
- 940
- 00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:05,087
- ...pulling it back
- and forth and out of nowhere...
- 941
- 00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:08,443
- His fat fist
- goes right through the canvas.
- 942
- 00:50:08,640 --> 00:50:11,803
- - But it was an accident.
- - Doesn't matter! You ruined my painting.
- 943
- 00:50:12,000 --> 00:50:14,924
- Okay. Honestly, I really think
- you should've thanked me.
- 944
- 00:50:15,120 --> 00:50:17,202
- Yeah, because that painting
- was hideous.
- 945
- 00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:18,561
- (CHUCKLES)
- 946
- 00:50:18,760 --> 00:50:21,331
- My grandfather painted that painting.
- 947
- 00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:24,330
- And it was my favorite thing
- in the entire world.
- 948
- 00:50:25,720 --> 00:50:28,690
- So we get in this screaming
- match in front of the whole building.
- 949
- 00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:31,207
- And everybody comes out
- and is watching it.
- 950
- 00:50:31,480 --> 00:50:33,608
- I mean, from that moment,
- we hated each other.
- 951
- 00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:35,285
- Oh, man.
- 952
- 00:50:36,600 --> 00:50:40,366
- - And then you fell in love. Oh!
- - Yeah. Then we fell in love.
- 953
- 00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:44,610
- - Ha, ha!
- - Hey, now. I think this is our exit.
- 954
- 00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:47,280
- David, could you grab me the map
- out of the glove box?
- 955
- 00:50:47,800 --> 00:50:49,131
- Yes, sir.
- 956
- 00:50:49,880 --> 00:50:52,611
- - Whoa. Whoa. Uh...
- ROSE: - Whoa!
- 957
- 00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:55,770
- DON: Oh, hey, sorry about that, buddy.
- Didn't mean to scare you there.
- 958
- 00:50:55,960 --> 00:50:57,803
- That's just my service pistol and badge.
- 959
- 00:50:58,000 --> 00:51:00,082
- Oh. Your badge.
- 960
- 00:51:00,680 --> 00:51:03,126
- - Are you a cop?
- - No, no, no.
- 961
- 00:51:03,320 --> 00:51:04,970
- No? Oh, God.
- 962
- 00:51:06,080 --> 00:51:07,286
- - I'm in the DEA.
- ROSE: - Oh.
- 963
- 00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:12,485
- (BREATHES DEEPLY)
- 964
- 00:51:13,240 --> 00:51:16,130
- Yeah, my Don has been an agent for the
- last 22 years.
- 965
- 00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:18,004
- On a bit of a hiatus at the moment.
- 966
- 00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:21,090
- They took him out of the field,
- he wasn't aggressive enough.
- 967
- 00:51:21,280 --> 00:51:23,487
- - That's enough.
- - I'm sorry. It's not right, Don.
- 968
- 00:51:23,720 --> 00:51:26,769
- Those young guns aren't half the
- agent you are, those crumb-bums.
- 969
- 00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:29,486
- Edith, you know how I feel
- about your cussing.
- 970
- 00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:32,889
- - I'm sorry, Don.
- - Edith can be a little hot-blooded at times.
- 971
- 00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,890
- - I'm 1/8 Italian, so...
- ROSE: - Oh. It's okay.
- 972
- 00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:40,840
- Uh, hey, if you guys will excuse me.
- 973
- 00:51:41,040 --> 00:51:42,849
- - Wanna join me?
- - Where are you off to?
- 974
- 00:51:43,040 --> 00:51:45,361
- - We're gonna check on the baby.
- - Gonna take a dump.
- 975
- 00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:47,927
- - Check the baby's dumps.
- ROSE: - That's what we should say.
- 976
- 00:51:48,160 --> 00:51:51,209
- - Yeah, just go check on Lebanon.
- - LeBron. His name's LeBron.
- 977
- 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:55,007
- He just has a terrible tummy.
- And it's just bad diarrhea stuff.
- 978
- 00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:56,531
- DON: Do we still have cornstarch?
- 979
- 00:51:56,720 --> 00:51:58,961
- EDIE: Yeah, there's
- cornstarch for his bottom.
- 980
- 00:51:59,160 --> 00:52:00,844
- - Family meeting.
- - Yep.
- 981
- 00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:03,683
- EDIE: I'm getting my hands on that baby.
- 982
- 00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:08,322
- He's a narc?
- Are you fucking kidding me?!
- 983
- 00:52:08,680 --> 00:52:12,002
- Stop panicking! We haven't done anything
- suspicious yet, so just relax!
- 984
- 00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:15,648
- Oh, really? Okay. What about when they
- wanna hold our precious weed baby?
- 985
- 00:52:15,840 --> 00:52:17,171
- Give me the baby, all right?
- 986
- 00:52:17,400 --> 00:52:19,721
- I'll handle it if it happens.
- I'll take care of it.
- 987
- 00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:23,481
- Right now, all we have to do is
- get away from that fucked up family.
- 988
- 00:52:23,840 --> 00:52:25,490
- Oh, fuck. Why are we stopping?
- 989
- 00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:29,162
- They heard us. They heard us.
- Fuck, we're going to jail.
- 990
- 00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:34,042
- No, no, no.
- We're just at the garage, okay?
- 991
- 00:52:34,240 --> 00:52:37,210
- Everybody calm down. We haven't
- done anything. You're right.
- 992
- 00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:40,927
- I'll ditch this guy real fast. We're gonna
- get in and get out of here, okay?
- 993
- 00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:43,771
- Game face, okay?
- Miller time. Here we go.
- 994
- 00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:46,684
- No other repair shops nearby?
- 995
- 00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:51,010
- Run by a Christian and open after
- supper on a Saturday night? No, sir.
- 996
- 00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:54,887
- Ah, shoot. I'd give you the hose out
- of our rig and send you on your way...
- 997
- 00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:56,764
- ...but we'd be stranded ourselves.
- 998
- 00:52:57,240 --> 00:53:00,164
- Besides, this way we can all get to
- know each other better.
- 999
- 00:53:00,440 --> 00:53:02,727
- - What's happening?
- - They're closed till morning.
- 1000
- 00:53:03,120 --> 00:53:04,531
- Oklahoma.
- 1001
- 00:53:05,240 --> 00:53:06,287
- Oh, God.
- 1002
- 00:53:06,480 --> 00:53:09,086
- You folks can make camp with the
- Fitzgeralds tonight.
- 1003
- 00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:13,330
- I know a great spot. We'll set up the old
- tents and you can bed down in our Winni.
- 1004
- 00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,126
- - I'll give you a hand with your gear.
- - No, no, no.
- 1005
- 00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,368
- That's okay.
- Millers carry their own weight.
- 1006
- 00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:21,564
- - I knew I liked you, David.
- - Kenny, you wanna get our shit?
- 1007
- 00:53:22,360 --> 00:53:24,601
- - Hey.
- - This will be a hoot.
- 1008
- 00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:28,289
- I'll watch your little one so you and your
- man can have some snuggle time.
- 1009
- 00:53:28,480 --> 00:53:30,960
- - I don't want you to have to...
- - I am good with babies.
- 1010
- 00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:33,561
- Nonsense! Oh, give me the baby.
- Give me that baby!
- 1011
- 00:53:34,760 --> 00:53:36,046
- (GASPS)
- 1012
- 00:53:36,240 --> 00:53:37,287
- (HORN BLARING)
- 1013
- 00:53:37,520 --> 00:53:39,602
- (ALL SCREAM)
- 1014
- 00:53:45,000 --> 00:53:46,047
- Shit!
- 1015
- 00:53:47,480 --> 00:53:48,527
- EDIE: Oh, my God!
- 1016
- 00:53:49,720 --> 00:53:51,768
- Oh, my God!
- 1017
- 00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:55,649
- Oh, my God.
- Why isn't there blood?!
- 1018
- 00:53:55,840 --> 00:53:58,730
- Oh, my God! What's happening?
- 1019
- 00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:02,931
- Thanks a lot, Mom. Now what am I
- supposed to use for my health project?
- 1020
- 00:54:03,120 --> 00:54:05,361
- I'm gonna fail and have to go to
- community college.
- 1021
- 00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:08,131
- - My future's ruined!
- - Honey.
- 1022
- 00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:10,323
- Mrs. Fitzgerald, are you all right?
- 1023
- 00:54:10,520 --> 00:54:13,842
- - That baby was...?
- - Oh, did you think that LeBron was...?
- 1024
- 00:54:14,040 --> 00:54:17,886
- ALL: Heh-heh-heh.
- - No, no, no. LeBron was a sack of herbs.
- 1025
- 00:54:18,080 --> 00:54:19,684
- Oregano and basil mostly.
- 1026
- 00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:22,611
- We were just treating it like
- a real baby, a summer project.
- 1027
- 00:54:22,800 --> 00:54:25,121
- - Extra credit.
- DAVID: - It teaches the students that...
- 1028
- 00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:27,000
- ...nothing ruins your life like children.
- 1029
- 00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:31,162
- Yeah. And it also sends that message
- to teens, just stick to the big A.
- 1030
- 00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:33,169
- - Yeah, anal.
- - Abstinence, you meant.
- 1031
- 00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:36,243
- - Neither makes a baby.
- - He confuses them.
- 1032
- 00:54:37,040 --> 00:54:39,850
- Anyway, I'm so sorry, Edie.
- We promised our Casey...
- 1033
- 00:54:40,080 --> 00:54:43,641
- ...that we would treat it like a real baby
- all summer and we went too far.
- 1034
- 00:54:43,880 --> 00:54:44,927
- Got used to it. Sorry.
- 1035
- 00:54:45,120 --> 00:54:46,681
- ROSE: And so I'm embarrassed, actually.
- 1036
- 00:54:46,880 --> 00:54:48,530
- I think that would scare anybody.
- 1037
- 00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:52,048
- She's very emotional. You should have
- seen her at the end of Free Willy.
- 1038
- 00:54:52,240 --> 00:54:53,446
- Oh, stop it, Don.
- 1039
- 00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:57,291
- I love that whale.
- 1040
- 00:54:57,680 --> 00:55:00,126
- Well, who loves campfire games?
- 1041
- 00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:02,123
- EDIE: Oh, Don.
- 1042
- 00:55:04,840 --> 00:55:07,081
- Ladies and gentlemen,
- it's my pleasure to welcome you...
- 1043
- 00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:10,409
- ...to the annual
- singing Fitzgerald family jamboree.
- 1044
- 00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,368
- Our usual guests couldn't
- be here this year.
- 1045
- 00:55:13,760 --> 00:55:17,207
- - Uh, they're called the Osmond family.
- - Ha-ha-ha!
- 1046
- 00:55:17,360 --> 00:55:19,647
- (BOTH LAUGHING)
- 1047
- 00:55:19,800 --> 00:55:25,204
- But in their place this year we have the
- very talented and wonderful Miller family.
- 1048
- 00:55:26,240 --> 00:55:29,801
- Let's get this party started
- with a Fitzgerald family favorite.
- 1049
- 00:55:30,400 --> 00:55:33,244
- (SINGING)
- Breakin' rocks in the hot sun
- 1050
- 00:55:33,400 --> 00:55:39,760
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1051
- 00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:41,251
- It always does.
- 1052
- 00:55:41,440 --> 00:55:44,728
- DON: I needed to steal some money
- 'Cause I had none
- 1053
- 00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:47,167
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1054
- 00:55:47,360 --> 00:55:48,407
- Now just the Millers.
- 1055
- 00:55:48,560 --> 00:55:52,042
- ALL: (SINGING)
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1056
- 00:55:52,240 --> 00:55:55,722
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1057
- 00:55:56,680 --> 00:56:00,685
- I want you to imagine you committed a felony,
- you've been tried and sent to prison...
- 1058
- 00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:04,561
- ...and you're standing out in the sun
- breaking up rocks with a sledgehammer. And...
- 1059
- 00:56:04,720 --> 00:56:07,644
- (SINGING)
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1060
- 00:56:07,840 --> 00:56:10,650
- I fought the law and the law won
- 1061
- 00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:12,719
- - All right, that's great.
- ROSE: - That's good.
- 1062
- 00:56:12,720 --> 00:56:15,166
- DAVID: That's fun. Great song.
- - I love it. That was great.
- 1063
- 00:56:15,320 --> 00:56:16,890
- Great choice.
- 1064
- 00:56:17,040 --> 00:56:20,362
- - Great, kids.
- - Well, that was an A for effort.
- 1065
- 00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:23,166
- - Whoo! I got the spirit!
- - That's great.
- 1066
- 00:56:23,320 --> 00:56:24,600
- EDIE: It's a bird, it's a plane.
- 1067
- 00:56:24,720 --> 00:56:27,724
- DON: U.S. Air Force, U.S. Air Force. Ollie North!
- EDIE: Take me home to...
- 1068
- 00:56:27,880 --> 00:56:29,291
- EDIE: Looks like a sea animal.
- 1069
- 00:56:29,720 --> 00:56:30,846
- Hammer tooth shark.
- 1070
- 00:56:31,040 --> 00:56:35,602
- (WHISPERING) We wait until they fall asleep
- and then we sneak into their tent, all right?
- 1071
- 00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:37,723
- (WHISPERING)
- Mm. Cut their throats.
- 1072
- 00:56:38,480 --> 00:56:40,369
- - What?
- - What?
- 1073
- 00:56:40,560 --> 00:56:42,369
- No. Jesus.
- 1074
- 00:56:42,680 --> 00:56:44,569
- - What the fuck's wrong with you?
- - Nothing.
- 1075
- 00:56:44,760 --> 00:56:48,242
- I wasn't saying to do that. I didn't say that.
- I thought you were gonna it.
- 1076
- 00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:50,841
- You thought I was gonna say
- "cut their throats"?
- 1077
- 00:56:51,280 --> 00:56:53,681
- Who do you think I am, Scarface?
- Give me a break.
- 1078
- 00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:55,760
- DON: Herbert Walker Bush!
- EDIE: Paper airplanes!
- 1079
- 00:56:56,320 --> 00:56:57,651
- Clowns. Clown sandwich.
- 1080
- 00:56:57,840 --> 00:56:59,444
- Don't lock the baby in the basement.
- 1081
- 00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:02,729
- What I was gonna say: We sneak
- into the tent, steal Don's keys...
- 1082
- 00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:06,686
- ...then we take the RV back to the shop and I
- can swap out their radiator hose for ours.
- 1083
- 00:57:06,880 --> 00:57:08,928
- Ah. Got it.
- 1084
- 00:57:09,120 --> 00:57:11,885
- - The Earth! The Earth is on fire!
- - Atmosphere.
- 1085
- 00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:13,366
- EDIE: Uh...
- 1086
- 00:57:13,560 --> 00:57:14,686
- (WHISPERS) Plain and simple.
- 1087
- 00:57:14,880 --> 00:57:16,484
- AI Qaeda! AI Qaeda!
- 1088
- 00:57:16,680 --> 00:57:18,205
- (BELL RINGS)
- 1089
- 00:57:18,400 --> 00:57:19,640
- It was "plain and simple."
- 1090
- 00:57:19,840 --> 00:57:25,131
- - See, this was a plane, and then this w...
- - Oh, Melissa, of course it was.
- 1091
- 00:57:25,480 --> 00:57:26,720
- That is so clever.
- 1092
- 00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:28,689
- Gosh, I thought it was really good.
- 1093
- 00:57:29,400 --> 00:57:31,243
- I'm a terrible drawer, so...
- 1094
- 00:57:32,440 --> 00:57:34,329
- - Great, because you're up next.
- - Ah.
- 1095
- 00:57:36,280 --> 00:57:38,408
- - Passing the baton.
- KENNY: - Nice work.
- 1096
- 00:57:38,640 --> 00:57:40,441
- ROSE: (IN NORMAL VOICE)
- Okay. Let's go, Kenny.
- 1097
- 00:57:40,640 --> 00:57:42,369
- DAVID (IN NORMAL VOICE)
- All right, Kenny, here we go.
- 1098
- 00:57:42,600 --> 00:57:44,887
- - Draw your brains out.
- ROSE: - All right, that's a line.
- 1099
- 00:57:45,080 --> 00:57:47,242
- - A slash. Guns and Roses.
- - Looks like a spring.
- 1100
- 00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:50,529
- What is that? That's a... Kenny,
- come on, draw something, buddy.
- 1101
- 00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:51,846
- CASEY: String.
- DAVID: Come on, son.
- 1102
- 00:57:52,040 --> 00:57:54,566
- - Rocket. It's a rocket or...
- - Is that a cucumber?
- 1103
- 00:57:54,760 --> 00:57:56,046
- This is really stupid.
- 1104
- 00:57:56,280 --> 00:57:58,886
- DAVID: Is it a bad drawing, Kenny?
- My guess is "bad drawing."
- 1105
- 00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:02,643
- - It's...
- - Oh! A penis! A penis.
- 1106
- 00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:06,249
- It's a big dick. Those are balls.
- 1107
- 00:58:06,440 --> 00:58:09,649
- It's a big black dick! It's a drawing.
- Black! It's a big black dick.
- 1108
- 00:58:10,600 --> 00:58:12,887
- It's a big, big black cock!
- 1109
- 00:58:13,640 --> 00:58:14,801
- Black Cock Down!
- 1110
- 00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:17,082
- (DON SIGHS
- THEN BELL RINGS)
- 1111
- 00:58:19,960 --> 00:58:21,200
- It's a skateboard.
- 1112
- 00:58:21,480 --> 00:58:24,245
- - It's a skateboard, great.
- - A skateboard. Of course it is.
- 1113
- 00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:27,364
- - It's a big black skateboard.
- ROSE: - I see it.
- 1114
- 00:58:27,600 --> 00:58:30,604
- Of course. It's very clear.
- But, you see, it was up... There's...
- 1115
- 00:58:30,800 --> 00:58:34,043
- Its wheels, so I didn't see it
- down on the ground, and then it...
- 1116
- 00:58:37,920 --> 00:58:40,651
- Black Cock Down? Black Cock Down?
- 1117
- 00:58:40,840 --> 00:58:43,491
- Nice job, Meryl Streep.
- Very subtle character work.
- 1118
- 00:58:43,680 --> 00:58:45,682
- Not my fault that Kenny can't draw.
- 1119
- 00:58:45,880 --> 00:58:47,564
- DAVID: Don't you pick on Kenny.
- 1120
- 00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,161
- ROSE: Nothing about that
- looked like a skateboard.
- 1121
- 00:58:50,360 --> 00:58:53,204
- You leave him alone.
- Where the hell's Kenny?
- 1122
- 00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:55,482
- - You guys, come here.
- - What?
- 1123
- 00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:57,364
- - What's going on?
- - Look at these two.
- 1124
- 00:58:57,560 --> 00:58:59,403
- ROSE: Aww.
- DAVID: Uh-oh.
- 1125
- 00:59:02,160 --> 00:59:04,811
- - Guess I'm not the best drawer.
- - No, you were great.
- 1126
- 00:59:05,000 --> 00:59:07,048
- - I knew that was a skateboard.
- - Yeah.
- 1127
- 00:59:07,400 --> 00:59:10,324
- - I don't know where the confusion was.
- - No, I... That...
- 1128
- 00:59:10,640 --> 00:59:12,130
- Yeah.
- 1129
- 00:59:13,040 --> 00:59:16,089
- I, um, really like your family.
- They're, uh...
- 1130
- 00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:19,881
- - They're different.
- - Well, they're not my family. I mean...
- 1131
- 00:59:20,080 --> 00:59:21,570
- Yeah, no, I get what you mean.
- 1132
- 00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:23,683
- - She wants him to kiss her.
- - Absolutely.
- 1133
- 00:59:23,880 --> 00:59:27,202
- CASEY: - She does, right?
- - And sometimes I feel like I'm adopted...
- 1134
- 00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:29,528
- ...or an alien, you know, or something.
- 1135
- 00:59:29,720 --> 00:59:32,644
- Right. That's what I meant. Um...
- 1136
- 00:59:32,880 --> 00:59:35,406
- But also, you know, I
- would totally adopt you.
- 1137
- 00:59:35,920 --> 00:59:37,126
- You know, um...
- 1138
- 00:59:38,640 --> 00:59:41,928
- Not that I wanna be your daddy.
- I just, uh...
- 1139
- 00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:44,607
- DAVID: He's talking too much.
- CASEY: He won't shut up.
- 1140
- 00:59:47,040 --> 00:59:48,326
- Uh, well, good night.
- 1141
- 00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:50,324
- (ALL GROAN)
- 1142
- 00:59:50,560 --> 00:59:52,324
- - I'll see you.
- - Okay. Um...
- 1143
- 00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:53,961
- Fucking hug.
- 1144
- 00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:55,241
- Okay.
- 1145
- 00:59:56,680 --> 00:59:57,727
- And, uh, Melissa?
- 1146
- 00:59:58,600 --> 01:00:01,604
- - Yeah?
- - Uh, watch out for bears.
- 1147
- 01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:05,407
- Um, you know. Can't see them coming.
- 1148
- 01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:07,286
- Good tip.
- 1149
- 01:00:13,880 --> 01:00:16,850
- That poor kid.
- Well, you should go talk to him.
- 1150
- 01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:18,486
- Who?
- 1151
- 01:00:19,480 --> 01:00:21,321
- I said you should go...
- Well, who do you think?
- 1152
- 01:00:21,480 --> 01:00:23,403
- Me? What the hell am I gonna say?
- 1153
- 01:00:23,600 --> 01:00:25,329
- Talk to him about guy stuff.
- 1154
- 01:00:25,880 --> 01:00:28,929
- - Jesus fucking Christ.
- - Come on, how hard is it? Just go.
- 1155
- 01:00:34,280 --> 01:00:37,170
- DAVID: Hey, man, how you doing?
- - Hey.
- 1156
- 01:00:37,400 --> 01:00:39,402
- - Anybody sitting here?
- - Uh, no.
- 1157
- 01:00:39,600 --> 01:00:42,649
- Well, good, good, good, good.
- All right.
- 1158
- 01:00:44,080 --> 01:00:45,491
- So, um...
- 1159
- 01:00:46,520 --> 01:00:49,524
- ...I saw what just happened
- with you and Melissa.
- 1160
- 01:00:50,240 --> 01:00:51,924
- - Oh.
- - Um...
- 1161
- 01:00:52,160 --> 01:00:56,802
- You know, you don't have to be scared to
- kiss a girl. Heh-heh.
- 1162
- 01:00:57,040 --> 01:01:01,329
- I mean, you damn near sucked a guy's dick
- nine hours ago. What are you shy now for?
- 1163
- 01:01:02,040 --> 01:01:03,644
- That's not funny, David.
- 1164
- 01:01:06,320 --> 01:01:09,130
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- 1165
- 01:01:09,920 --> 01:01:12,048
- It was a bad joke. Ahem.
- 1166
- 01:01:14,320 --> 01:01:17,085
- You wanna know something I used
- to do when I was your age...
- 1167
- 01:01:17,280 --> 01:01:19,487
- ...kept me from
- getting nervous around girls?
- 1168
- 01:01:20,200 --> 01:01:23,443
- - Yeah.
- - I would just count to three.
- 1169
- 01:01:24,360 --> 01:01:26,283
- - Count to three?
- - Yeah.
- 1170
- 01:01:26,840 --> 01:01:29,571
- - That's your big advice? Count to three?
- - Yeah.
- 1171
- 01:01:29,760 --> 01:01:33,970
- I mean, if you ever wanna kiss a girl
- or ask her to go out, or I mean...
- 1172
- 01:01:34,160 --> 01:01:37,687
- Actually, if you get scared of anything,
- just do this: just count to three...
- 1173
- 01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:39,251
- ...and then do it.
- 1174
- 01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:44,762
- Because if you take too long, you overthink
- it and you'll just drive yourself crazy.
- 1175
- 01:01:44,960 --> 01:01:46,803
- Trust me, it'll change your life.
- 1176
- 01:01:48,160 --> 01:01:49,924
- I guess that makes sense.
- 1177
- 01:01:51,160 --> 01:01:53,527
- - Thanks.
- - Yeah. No problem.
- 1178
- 01:01:53,720 --> 01:01:57,122
- And, you know, if you have any other
- questions...
- 1179
- 01:01:57,320 --> 01:01:59,288
- ...about, like, the birds and the bees...
- 1180
- 01:01:59,520 --> 01:02:02,171
- ...who puts what into where,
- any of that fun stuff...
- 1181
- 01:02:02,400 --> 01:02:05,006
- ...just don't hesitate to ask, okay?
- 1182
- 01:02:05,240 --> 01:02:06,287
- - Okay.
- - Okay.
- 1183
- 01:02:06,560 --> 01:02:08,040
- - Good talk.
- KENNY: - Yeah, good talk.
- 1184
- 01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:10,003
- DAVID: Oh, my back.
- 1185
- 01:02:10,560 --> 01:02:12,927
- - So old.
- KENNY: - Yeah.
- 1186
- 01:02:18,520 --> 01:02:20,648
- (OWL HOOTING)
- 1187
- 01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:39,883
- (MOUTHING) Wait. You go in.
- I'll keep a lookout, okay? Good.
- 1188
- 01:02:40,080 --> 01:02:43,721
- (MOUTHING) Fuck you. This was your idea.
- You're going the fuck in there.
- 1189
- 01:02:43,920 --> 01:02:45,570
- Why are you yelling at me?
- 1190
- 01:02:45,760 --> 01:02:47,808
- I am not yelling at you.
- 1191
- 01:02:48,000 --> 01:02:50,446
- Okay. Okay.
- 1192
- 01:02:52,320 --> 01:02:53,560
- Watch.
- 1193
- 01:03:09,120 --> 01:03:10,531
- Bin Laden!
- 1194
- 01:03:11,680 --> 01:03:13,205
- What's happening? Is it raccoons?
- 1195
- 01:03:14,480 --> 01:03:15,641
- God.
- 1196
- 01:03:16,120 --> 01:03:17,690
- You were right about them, Edith.
- 1197
- 01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:19,644
- - No. I'm so sorry.
- - Let me explain.
- 1198
- 01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:21,251
- This is completely explainable.
- 1199
- 01:03:21,480 --> 01:03:23,721
- - A misunderstanding.
- - We didn't mean to do this.
- 1200
- 01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,760
- - You just have to understand something.
- ROSE: Mm-hm, mm-hm.
- 1201
- 01:03:30,040 --> 01:03:33,442
- We have never done anything like this with
- another couple before.
- 1202
- 01:03:34,240 --> 01:03:35,651
- Uh-huh.
- 1203
- 01:03:35,840 --> 01:03:38,446
- That's no judgment on you.
- We're no squares.
- 1204
- 01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:40,802
- - I own a vibrator.
- - That's right, she does.
- 1205
- 01:03:41,680 --> 01:03:43,360
- - Awesome.
- DON: - I wasn't for it at first.
- 1206
- 01:03:43,480 --> 01:03:46,450
- The darn thing's made in China,
- for cripes' sake...
- 1207
- 01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:51,362
- ...but when you've been married this long
- you look for anything to spice things up.
- 1208
- 01:03:51,560 --> 01:03:55,406
- So, of course we've discussed a scenario
- like this.
- 1209
- 01:03:55,640 --> 01:03:59,725
- Yes. And tonight when you brought up
- that big black "babymaker"...
- 1210
- 01:04:00,720 --> 01:04:02,848
- DON: Well, we got it.
- - Loud and clear.
- 1211
- 01:04:03,040 --> 01:04:05,361
- Our vibrator is named "Joe Morgan."
- 1212
- 01:04:05,880 --> 01:04:08,724
- We were picking up
- what you were putting down.
- 1213
- 01:04:09,080 --> 01:04:11,048
- EDIE: Same page.
- - Interesting.
- 1214
- 01:04:11,280 --> 01:04:15,330
- We're very flattered by this, but right
- now, in the middle of the night...
- 1215
- 01:04:15,520 --> 01:04:18,922
- ...I'm not sure I'm really ready for it.
- Aw, Don.
- 1216
- 01:04:19,160 --> 01:04:21,447
- Got it. Totally understood. Not a problem.
- 1217
- 01:04:21,640 --> 01:04:23,005
- We just had to ask. So...
- 1218
- 01:04:23,200 --> 01:04:24,486
- EDIE: Wait. I have an idea.
- 1219
- 01:04:26,320 --> 01:04:31,008
- Okay. Maybe I could take
- a baby step tonight.
- 1220
- 01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:33,771
- I mean, my mouth is for my marriage.
- 1221
- 01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:36,924
- But I've never touched
- another woman before.
- 1222
- 01:04:40,040 --> 01:04:43,328
- I would be okay with that. Yeah.
- 1223
- 01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:45,087
- EDIE: Oh, great.
- 1224
- 01:04:45,960 --> 01:04:47,200
- Rose?
- 1225
- 01:04:48,200 --> 01:04:50,487
- - There you go.
- - Okay. All right, I'm sitting.
- 1226
- 01:04:50,760 --> 01:04:52,171
- - Are you okay?
- - David.
- 1227
- 01:04:52,400 --> 01:04:55,370
- - Mother to mother, is this okay with you?
- - Yes. "Mother." Yes.
- 1228
- 01:04:55,560 --> 01:04:57,881
- - Are you sure?
- - Let's get this mother started.
- 1229
- 01:04:58,120 --> 01:05:00,521
- - Shall we? Okay.
- EDIE: - Ha-ha-ha!
- 1230
- 01:05:00,760 --> 01:05:03,764
- - Okay, Don, are you watching?
- - I'm good.
- 1231
- 01:05:04,720 --> 01:05:06,563
- Okay. Uh, wow.
- 1232
- 01:05:06,760 --> 01:05:09,411
- My heart's pounding
- so fast in my chest.
- 1233
- 01:05:09,600 --> 01:05:12,251
- - Ahem. So I guess we're swinging.
- - Hmm? Oh, yeah.
- 1234
- 01:05:12,440 --> 01:05:14,283
- Ooh. Ha, ha.
- 1235
- 01:05:14,480 --> 01:05:15,925
- EDIE: Sorry that I'm taking so long.
- 1236
- 01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,202
- Hello. Ha-ha-ha!
- 1237
- 01:05:19,840 --> 01:05:22,889
- Okay, I'm just gonna do it real fast.
- There we go.
- 1238
- 01:05:23,600 --> 01:05:25,011
- - There they are.
- - There they are.
- 1239
- 01:05:25,200 --> 01:05:28,488
- - Wow! Wow!
- ROSE: - It's happening. This is happening.
- 1240
- 01:05:29,480 --> 01:05:32,563
- EDIE: Don, are you looking at this?
- I'm touching her boobs.
- 1241
- 01:05:32,960 --> 01:05:35,008
- - This is a miracle.
- - Okey-doke.
- 1242
- 01:05:35,240 --> 01:05:38,483
- - Would you like to feel my breasts?
- - I think that's enough for tonight.
- 1243
- 01:05:38,680 --> 01:05:40,489
- - You're right.
- - Don't give away the farm.
- 1244
- 01:05:40,680 --> 01:05:42,444
- - A little roughhouse?
- - We should wait.
- 1245
- 01:05:43,280 --> 01:05:45,408
- - Are you okay down there?
- - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- 1246
- 01:05:45,600 --> 01:05:47,011
- Have fun tonight, kids.
- 1247
- 01:05:48,360 --> 01:05:52,285
- ROSE: Awesome.
- - I'm never gonna wash these hands.
- 1248
- 01:05:52,480 --> 01:05:53,845
- Mwah, mwah, mwah!
- 1249
- 01:05:54,400 --> 01:05:55,640
- Thank you so much.
- 1250
- 01:05:56,040 --> 01:05:58,080
- ROSE: Good night. That was great.
- - Okay, bye, guys.
- 1251
- 01:05:58,200 --> 01:06:00,202
- Great. What now, genius?
- 1252
- 01:06:00,360 --> 01:06:02,408
- - Tell me... What?
- - Oh, Oh, oh. I don't know.
- 1253
- 01:06:02,600 --> 01:06:04,090
- I just got earfucked in a tent.
- 1254
- 01:06:04,240 --> 01:06:07,050
- If you let her finger bang you
- they would have given us the keys.
- 1255
- 01:06:07,200 --> 01:06:09,965
- Oh, really? Why don't you go
- suck Don's dick for them...
- 1256
- 01:06:10,120 --> 01:06:13,329
- ...and then you get the keys?
- He was certainly loving on those earlobes.
- 1257
- 01:06:13,480 --> 01:06:16,882
- Okay, look. First, unlike you, I only
- suck a man's dick if I'm in love, okay?
- 1258
- 01:06:17,040 --> 01:06:18,724
- That's kind of a personal rule I have.
- 1259
- 01:06:18,880 --> 01:06:21,167
- - Yeah, and secondly... And secondly...
- - What?
- 1260
- 01:06:24,160 --> 01:06:27,289
- I don't have a second one.
- I don't know where I was going with that.
- 1261
- 01:06:27,440 --> 01:06:29,329
- Fucking idiot.
- 1262
- 01:06:29,960 --> 01:06:31,883
- Oh, I thought of one. I got one.
- 1263
- 01:06:32,040 --> 01:06:34,361
- (VIBRATOR HUMMING
- AND DON & EDIE GIGGLING)
- 1264
- 01:06:35,920 --> 01:06:38,048
- DON: Here comes Joe Morgan up to the plate.
- 1265
- 01:06:38,200 --> 01:06:39,326
- (BOTH GIGGLE)
- 1266
- 01:06:39,480 --> 01:06:40,811
- EDIE: Oh, Don.
- 1267
- 01:06:41,640 --> 01:06:43,051
- (KENNY SIGHS)
- 1268
- 01:06:46,400 --> 01:06:47,481
- Okay, what?
- 1269
- 01:06:49,560 --> 01:06:50,891
- What? What do you mean?
- 1270
- 01:06:51,080 --> 01:06:52,445
- Do you wanna talk about it...
- 1271
- 01:06:52,640 --> 01:06:55,405
- ...or mope around like
- someone kicked you in the vagina?
- 1272
- 01:06:57,400 --> 01:06:59,323
- Okay. Um...
- 1273
- 01:06:59,520 --> 01:07:01,568
- Well, I've never really like...
- 1274
- 01:07:01,760 --> 01:07:03,922
- Had sex before. Shocker.
- 1275
- 01:07:04,160 --> 01:07:05,650
- Kissed a girl before.
- 1276
- 01:07:06,240 --> 01:07:09,608
- Wait, what? I thought you said
- you were like 18.
- 1277
- 01:07:10,000 --> 01:07:12,401
- - Okay, you know what, forget it.
- - Okay, okay, wait. Okay.
- 1278
- 01:07:12,600 --> 01:07:15,604
- Come on. Sit down.
- Don't need to be so dramatic.
- 1279
- 01:07:15,840 --> 01:07:18,411
- Look, it's okay
- that you haven't kissed a girl.
- 1280
- 01:07:18,600 --> 01:07:20,807
- I'm sure there are some girls...
- 1281
- 01:07:21,000 --> 01:07:22,764
- ...who I've never met...
- 1282
- 01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:25,567
- ...that find inexperience
- kind of sweet.
- 1283
- 01:07:25,760 --> 01:07:30,163
- I don't wanna be a sweet, inexperienced
- guy who's never been worth kissing.
- 1284
- 01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:35,648
- I wanna be the guy who grabs a girl
- and kisses her. You know?
- 1285
- 01:07:38,760 --> 01:07:41,445
- Okay, let me make one thing clear.
- 1286
- 01:07:41,640 --> 01:07:44,689
- This isn't one of those moments
- where the girl kisses the boy...
- 1287
- 01:07:44,880 --> 01:07:47,884
- ...and realizes she's been in love with him
- the whole time, okay?
- 1288
- 01:07:48,720 --> 01:07:50,848
- You're my fake brother
- and you're a sweet kid...
- 1289
- 01:07:51,080 --> 01:07:53,560
- ...so this is for you
- to bring back to Melissa.
- 1290
- 01:07:53,760 --> 01:07:55,888
- - What is?
- - I'm gonna kiss you, dingus.
- 1291
- 01:07:56,720 --> 01:07:58,245
- Oh.
- 1292
- 01:07:59,840 --> 01:08:02,491
- - What are you doing? Shut your eyes.
- - Okay, sorry. Right.
- 1293
- 01:08:02,720 --> 01:08:04,927
- That's weird. That's really weird.
- 1294
- 01:08:05,120 --> 01:08:07,168
- - Sorry.
- - All right. Ahem.
- 1295
- 01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:14,962
- That was okay.
- Now more tongue.
- 1296
- 01:08:15,160 --> 01:08:17,401
- Tongue. I can do that.
- 1297
- 01:08:20,080 --> 01:08:22,287
- Too much tongue. Too much tongue.
- 1298
- 01:08:22,720 --> 01:08:26,088
- Right. Too much...
- Yeah, that's my fault. My bad. Sorry.
- 1299
- 01:08:28,120 --> 01:08:29,201
- Less tongue.
- 1300
- 01:08:34,720 --> 01:08:35,767
- That was good.
- 1301
- 01:08:36,960 --> 01:08:39,884
- All right, now this time, I want you
- to choke me a little bit.
- 1302
- 01:08:40,080 --> 01:08:44,051
- - Uh, okay.
- DAVID: - Whoa. What's going on here?
- 1303
- 01:08:44,240 --> 01:08:45,730
- Uh, it's...
- 1304
- 01:08:45,920 --> 01:08:48,844
- - We're not doing what it looks like.
- - Really?
- 1305
- 01:08:49,080 --> 01:08:51,731
- It looks like Casey's
- teaching you how to kiss out of pity.
- 1306
- 01:08:51,920 --> 01:08:53,081
- CASEY: Mm-hm.
- 1307
- 01:08:53,280 --> 01:08:55,851
- Uh, well, then it is what
- it looks like, yeah.
- 1308
- 01:08:56,200 --> 01:08:57,486
- Really.
- 1309
- 01:08:57,840 --> 01:08:59,285
- What did you teach him?
- 1310
- 01:08:59,480 --> 01:09:02,404
- The basics.
- He's never kissed a girl before.
- 1311
- 01:09:02,880 --> 01:09:05,531
- You haven't?
- Oh. Well, honey, show me.
- 1312
- 01:09:05,720 --> 01:09:07,882
- - Uh, really?
- - Yes.
- 1313
- 01:09:08,480 --> 01:09:09,606
- Okay. Uh...
- 1314
- 01:09:12,240 --> 01:09:14,447
- Oh. Not bad.
- 1315
- 01:09:14,640 --> 01:09:16,005
- It's not bad.
- 1316
- 01:09:16,480 --> 01:09:18,164
- - Try this.
- - Okay.
- 1317
- 01:09:18,360 --> 01:09:19,441
- Come here.
- 1318
- 01:09:21,360 --> 01:09:22,805
- (KENNY GRUNTS)
- 1319
- 01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:24,047
- There you go.
- 1320
- 01:09:26,280 --> 01:09:28,203
- You feel that?
- What I did with my tongue?
- 1321
- 01:09:28,960 --> 01:09:32,169
- - Yes, ma'am.
- - Show Casey what you just learned.
- 1322
- 01:09:35,840 --> 01:09:37,410
- Look at that.
- 1323
- 01:09:38,280 --> 01:09:40,681
- Mm! Whoa!
- 1324
- 01:09:40,880 --> 01:09:42,120
- DAVID: Wait. Hold on.
- 1325
- 01:09:42,360 --> 01:09:46,251
- I wanna get a picture of you with the
- first girl you ever kissed. Here you go.
- 1326
- 01:09:46,440 --> 01:09:47,965
- - Mm-hm. Make it good.
- - Good.
- 1327
- 01:09:48,200 --> 01:09:51,090
- Rose. Get in there.
- There you go. Photobomb it.
- 1328
- 01:09:52,160 --> 01:09:54,606
- - This is getting better, it's getting better.
- - Okay.
- 1329
- 01:09:58,600 --> 01:10:00,125
- ROSE: It's so cute.
- 1330
- 01:10:00,320 --> 01:10:02,448
- DAVID: Use your hands. They got
- so much fun stuff to play with.
- 1331
- 01:10:02,640 --> 01:10:04,290
- You're not using your hands.
- 1332
- 01:10:09,160 --> 01:10:10,730
- MELISSA: Kenny?
- 1333
- 01:10:13,040 --> 01:10:15,281
- - No, Melissa... It's, uh...
- - I'm sorry.
- 1334
- 01:10:15,520 --> 01:10:17,010
- KENNY: Melissa, wait.
- 1335
- 01:10:18,080 --> 01:10:19,206
- Fuck.
- 1336
- 01:10:20,480 --> 01:10:23,324
- You know, there's a 50-50 chance
- she'll be into it.
- 1337
- 01:10:23,520 --> 01:10:25,443
- (WHISPERS)
- Redhead. They're crazy.
- 1338
- 01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:37,565
- Grab your things, guys.
- Kenny, grab my stuff. Thanks.
- 1339
- 01:10:37,720 --> 01:10:40,166
- - Here we go.
- - Well, looks like you're ready to roll.
- 1340
- 01:10:40,320 --> 01:10:44,006
- Gary called me first thing. He seemed real
- eager for y'all to come pick her up.
- 1341
- 01:10:44,160 --> 01:10:46,845
- - Good. Good, good, good. Okay.
- - Guess this is it, then.
- 1342
- 01:10:47,000 --> 01:10:49,765
- - Good luck to you, David.
- - Hey, thank you, Don. Take care, will you?
- 1343
- 01:10:49,920 --> 01:10:53,481
- Hey, yeah, listen, I would appreciate it
- if you kept what happened last night...
- 1344
- 01:10:53,680 --> 01:10:55,967
- ...all that Chinese
- vibrator talk, between us.
- 1345
- 01:10:56,120 --> 01:10:59,169
- - Yeah.
- - If folks at my church found out about that...
- 1346
- 01:10:59,320 --> 01:11:02,927
- Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, no. I get it. Yeah.
- No, say no more. Mum's the word, okay?
- 1347
- 01:11:03,080 --> 01:11:04,201
- Before you go running off...
- 1348
- 01:11:04,360 --> 01:11:06,681
- - Yeah?
- - Well, last night notwithstanding...
- 1349
- 01:11:06,840 --> 01:11:09,730
- ...things bedroom-wise between me
- and Mrs. Fitzgerald...
- 1350
- 01:11:09,880 --> 01:11:12,963
- - ...haven't been a real five-alarm fire of late.
- - Okay.
- 1351
- 01:11:13,160 --> 01:11:16,607
- Now that I'm not working as much, we have
- a chance to light the flame again...
- 1352
- 01:11:16,760 --> 01:11:19,684
- - ...but our matches are wet.
- - Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
- 1353
- 01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:23,083
- - If you catch my drift.
- - I do, yeah.
- 1354
- 01:11:23,240 --> 01:11:25,083
- Yeah, the matches are genitals. I get it.
- 1355
- 01:11:25,240 --> 01:11:28,050
- No, I was talking about our passion.
- 1356
- 01:11:28,200 --> 01:11:30,282
- Right. Sorry, sorry. Of course.
- That's the way...
- 1357
- 01:11:30,440 --> 01:11:32,090
- - That's okay. That's all right.
- - Yeah.
- 1358
- 01:11:32,240 --> 01:11:33,924
- So we've been looking for new ideas...
- 1359
- 01:11:34,080 --> 01:11:37,084
- ...and she read on the internet
- about this finger thing...
- 1360
- 01:11:37,240 --> 01:11:40,483
- - Don, you don't need to share that with me.
- - No, no, it's okay. I want to.
- 1361
- 01:11:40,640 --> 01:11:42,210
- Okay, as long as you're comfortable.
- 1362
- 01:11:42,400 --> 01:11:43,925
- - I need your advice, David.
- - Mm-hm.
- 1363
- 01:11:44,240 --> 01:11:47,050
- You and Rose seem hotter for each other
- than a couple mice...
- 1364
- 01:11:47,200 --> 01:11:49,282
- ...having sexual congress in a wool sock.
- 1365
- 01:11:49,920 --> 01:11:51,365
- - We do?
- - Yeah.
- 1366
- 01:11:51,520 --> 01:11:54,330
- You're like newlyweds,
- the way you keep looking at each other.
- 1367
- 01:11:54,920 --> 01:11:57,400
- - We are?
- - Yeah. I guess I just wanna know...
- 1368
- 01:11:57,560 --> 01:12:02,521
- ...what do you do to keep things exciting
- after years in the same fishing hole?
- 1369
- 01:12:02,680 --> 01:12:04,842
- - Hmm.
- - What's your secret?
- 1370
- 01:12:05,200 --> 01:12:06,406
- Right.
- 1371
- 01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:08,642
- - And by fishing hole you mean...
- - Genitals.
- 1372
- 01:12:08,840 --> 01:12:10,080
- That's genitals. Okay. Um.
- 1373
- 01:12:10,240 --> 01:12:13,369
- Yeah, um, my secret? Uh...
- 1374
- 01:12:14,280 --> 01:12:16,328
- Well, you know what I do, Don?
- 1375
- 01:12:16,680 --> 01:12:19,126
- I just treat
- Rose like she's a stripper.
- 1376
- 01:12:20,520 --> 01:12:22,363
- (CHUCKLES)
- 1377
- 01:12:22,560 --> 01:12:24,050
- - No kidding?
- - No kidding.
- 1378
- 01:12:24,200 --> 01:12:26,362
- Like she's a dirty, dirty stripper.
- 1379
- 01:12:28,520 --> 01:12:30,124
- Okay. Heh-heh-heh.
- 1380
- 01:12:30,320 --> 01:12:31,765
- Dirtier the better. Heh.
- 1381
- 01:12:31,920 --> 01:12:34,082
- - Heh, heh.
- EDIE: - Okay, watch your step.
- 1382
- 01:12:34,480 --> 01:12:37,131
- It surprise... It sneaks up on you.
- 1383
- 01:12:37,520 --> 01:12:38,726
- Everyone got your bags?
- 1384
- 01:12:39,240 --> 01:12:42,847
- Oh. I am so sorry that Melissa
- isn't here to say goodbye.
- 1385
- 01:12:43,080 --> 01:12:44,681
- She just won't come out of that bedroom.
- 1386
- 01:12:44,800 --> 01:12:47,610
- You know, she's been sick to her tummy
- ever since last night.
- 1387
- 01:12:47,840 --> 01:12:51,128
- - I think it was something that she ate.
- - Just tell her I'm really sorry.
- 1388
- 01:12:51,320 --> 01:12:52,651
- - Oh, sure.
- - Oh.
- 1389
- 01:12:53,120 --> 01:12:54,451
- EDIE: Sure will.
- 1390
- 01:12:56,240 --> 01:12:58,129
- Oh, so sweet, kids.
- 1391
- 01:13:00,320 --> 01:13:02,402
- (WHISPERS)
- You'll always be my special lover.
- 1392
- 01:13:04,000 --> 01:13:06,082
- Ow! Oh, Edie.
- 1393
- 01:13:07,280 --> 01:13:08,520
- (IN NORMAL VOICE) Bye!
- 1394
- 01:13:08,720 --> 01:13:11,564
- - Happy birthday, America!
- - Bye!
- 1395
- 01:13:11,760 --> 01:13:13,524
- - See ya, now!
- - Bye-bye, now.
- 1396
- 01:13:13,720 --> 01:13:15,688
- (DAVID CHUCKLING)
- 1397
- 01:13:15,880 --> 01:13:17,564
- - Thank you.
- - Bye.
- 1398
- 01:13:17,760 --> 01:13:21,560
- Let's get out of here. You guys, go to
- the RV. I'll get the keys from Skeeter.
- 1399
- 01:13:26,040 --> 01:13:27,451
- Hello?!
- 1400
- 01:13:28,600 --> 01:13:30,682
- (CELL PHONE RINGING)
- 1401
- 01:13:32,000 --> 01:13:33,809
- Hey, Brad, I was just gonna call you.
- 1402
- 01:13:34,160 --> 01:13:36,208
- Where are you?
- Thought you'd be here by now.
- 1403
- 01:13:36,360 --> 01:13:37,805
- I told you I needed it today.
- 1404
- 01:13:37,960 --> 01:13:41,442
- No, I know that. No, we just had a little
- bit of engine trouble's all, okay?
- 1405
- 01:13:41,640 --> 01:13:45,929
- We're gonna be on the road in five minutes,
- at your front door in just a few hours, okay?
- 1406
- 01:13:46,080 --> 01:13:47,809
- Nothing stopping us now.
- 1407
- 01:13:48,240 --> 01:13:49,685
- What the fuck?
- 1408
- 01:13:51,760 --> 01:13:53,410
- Hand me the phone.
- 1409
- 01:13:53,560 --> 01:13:55,961
- Uh, Brad, can you hold on for a sec?
- 1410
- 01:13:56,320 --> 01:13:58,322
- All right, let's not do anything rash.
- 1411
- 01:13:58,680 --> 01:14:01,206
- - I'm David, what's your name?
- - Pablo Chacon.
- 1412
- 01:14:01,360 --> 01:14:03,488
- Shut the fuck up. Stop, stop.
- 1413
- 01:14:03,640 --> 01:14:06,371
- - Hola, Brad.
- - Pablo!
- 1414
- 01:14:06,520 --> 01:14:08,045
- (SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 1415
- 01:14:08,480 --> 01:14:11,051
- You send this amateur fuck-up
- to steal from me?
- 1416
- 01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:13,931
- Listen, I don't know
- what David told you... Hello?
- 1417
- 01:14:15,000 --> 01:14:17,685
- I would have loved to say good-bye to him.
- 1418
- 01:14:24,880 --> 01:14:25,927
- Pablo Chacon.
- 1419
- 01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:29,809
- Turns out there's a real Pablo Chacon
- and we stole from him.
- 1420
- 01:14:29,960 --> 01:14:33,806
- So this is probably gonna end well,
- I would imagine.
- 1421
- 01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:38,007
- I'll be right back.
- 1422
- 01:14:38,520 --> 01:14:39,567
- No rush.
- 1423
- 01:14:41,280 --> 01:14:44,489
- I thought you said we were
- picking up drugs for Pablo Chacon.
- 1424
- 01:14:44,640 --> 01:14:47,291
- I thought we were.
- Brad told me he was Pablo Chacon.
- 1425
- 01:14:47,440 --> 01:14:49,681
- ROSE: Why do you trust that guy?
- DAVID: I don't, okay?
- 1426
- 01:14:49,880 --> 01:14:52,167
- Can you guys stop bickering
- for five seconds?
- 1427
- 01:14:52,320 --> 01:14:54,482
- Okay, how did he even find us?
- 1428
- 01:14:54,640 --> 01:14:56,130
- - We don't know.
- - I don't know.
- 1429
- 01:14:56,280 --> 01:14:57,566
- PABLO: With this.
- 1430
- 01:14:59,600 --> 01:15:02,524
- Cool, is that a transmitter?
- That's like a...
- 1431
- 01:15:02,760 --> 01:15:04,967
- You put that in the RV, huh?
- In one of the bags?
- 1432
- 01:15:05,120 --> 01:15:09,330
- - How could you not think of that?
- - Because I don't know what I'm doing!
- 1433
- 01:15:09,520 --> 01:15:11,807
- - Have you not figured that out?
- - Silence!
- 1434
- 01:15:15,040 --> 01:15:16,610
- You all die now.
- 1435
- 01:15:16,760 --> 01:15:19,081
- But together as a family, with honor.
- 1436
- 01:15:19,800 --> 01:15:24,203
- But we're not even a real family, okay?
- I don't even know these people.
- 1437
- 01:15:24,360 --> 01:15:25,600
- (SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- 1438
- 01:15:25,760 --> 01:15:29,003
- She's right. That's absolutely right. No, no.
- We're not related at all, any of us.
- 1439
- 01:15:29,160 --> 01:15:30,525
- No. We're just friends.
- 1440
- 01:15:30,680 --> 01:15:32,569
- - No, we're not...
- - We are not friends!
- 1441
- 01:15:32,720 --> 01:15:35,166
- Look, I'm just a small-time
- fucking drug dealer.
- 1442
- 01:15:35,320 --> 01:15:36,685
- I sell dime bags, all right?
- 1443
- 01:15:36,880 --> 01:15:40,487
- My daughter here
- is just a homeless gutter punk, all right?
- 1444
- 01:15:40,680 --> 01:15:44,890
- And my son is just a fucking dork that
- lives in my building. We don't look alike!
- 1445
- 01:15:45,040 --> 01:15:47,725
- ROSE: - Not related.
- - A virgin, okay? And my "wife"?
- 1446
- 01:15:48,160 --> 01:15:49,969
- I mean, she's just a cheap stripper.
- 1447
- 01:15:50,120 --> 01:15:52,088
- Hey, thanks, David. Nice.
- 1448
- 01:15:52,240 --> 01:15:54,811
- DAVID: We will not do anything if...
- - Wait, wait. Heh.
- 1449
- 01:15:54,960 --> 01:15:57,850
- In the capri pants and the sensible
- footwear, a stripper?
- 1450
- 01:15:59,080 --> 01:16:00,206
- Yes.
- 1451
- 01:16:01,240 --> 01:16:02,366
- That's right, I am...
- 1452
- 01:16:03,320 --> 01:16:04,890
- ...Mr. Chacon.
- 1453
- 01:16:05,720 --> 01:16:07,927
- Just give me one chance...
- 1454
- 01:16:08,120 --> 01:16:13,206
- ...to prove to you that I'm worth
- way more alive than I am dead.
- 1455
- 01:16:16,000 --> 01:16:18,207
- (AEROSMITH'S "SWEET EMOTION"
- PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)
- 1456
- 01:16:20,720 --> 01:16:21,220
- Sweet
- 1457
- 01:16:25,440 --> 01:16:25,940
- Emotion
- 1458
- 01:16:30,320 --> 01:16:33,130
- Talk about things
- And nobody cares
- 1459
- 01:16:35,640 --> 01:16:38,007
- Wearing hot things
- That nobody wears
- 1460
- 01:16:45,240 --> 01:16:48,323
- Some sweat hog knew
- She's a real good liar
- 1461
- 01:16:49,880 --> 01:16:53,089
- 'Cause the backstage boogie
- Set your pants on fire
- 1462
- 01:16:57,840 --> 01:17:01,765
- Sweet
- 1463
- 01:17:01,920 --> 01:17:02,420
- Emotion
- 1464
- 01:17:06,680 --> 01:17:07,180
- Sweet
- 1465
- 01:17:11,600 --> 01:17:15,321
- Emotion
- 1466
- 01:17:16,440 --> 01:17:19,410
- You stand in the front
- Just a shakin' your ass
- 1467
- 01:17:21,400 --> 01:17:24,609
- I'll take you backstage
- You'll be drinking my glass
- 1468
- 01:17:26,240 --> 01:17:29,369
- I'm talkin' about something
- You can sure understand
- 1469
- 01:17:43,920 --> 01:17:46,082
- Have some respect, it's your mother.
- 1470
- 01:18:17,720 --> 01:18:19,210
- (PABLO SCREAMS)
- 1471
- 01:18:19,360 --> 01:18:20,771
- DAVID: Get in the RV! Go, go, go!
- 1472
- 01:18:21,720 --> 01:18:23,609
- (GRUNTS)
- 1473
- 01:18:28,440 --> 01:18:29,487
- Why are we fighting?
- 1474
- 01:18:34,600 --> 01:18:36,250
- - Do you know how to drive this?
- - No.
- 1475
- 01:18:37,280 --> 01:18:38,520
- No weapons. Here we go.
- 1476
- 01:18:38,720 --> 01:18:40,882
- CASEY: Hurry!
- KENNY: I don't know how it works.
- 1477
- 01:18:41,080 --> 01:18:43,321
- (BOTH YELL
- THEN ONE-EYE GRUNTS)
- 1478
- 01:18:43,520 --> 01:18:44,851
- CASEY: Fuck!
- 1479
- 01:18:49,560 --> 01:18:52,291
- - What just happened?
- - I knocked him out. Let's go.
- 1480
- 01:18:52,480 --> 01:18:53,641
- - You did not.
- - Yes, I did.
- 1481
- 01:18:57,720 --> 01:18:59,245
- Come on, Rose, come on. Come on!
- 1482
- 01:19:02,720 --> 01:19:04,006
- - Look out!
- - Oh, no, please.
- 1483
- 01:19:10,440 --> 01:19:12,442
- Kenny! Kenny, give me the wheel!
- 1484
- 01:19:12,680 --> 01:19:14,045
- No, do not pull over!
- 1485
- 01:19:15,320 --> 01:19:18,051
- Go this way!
- No, no, no. Don't get on the freeway.
- 1486
- 01:19:18,240 --> 01:19:20,686
- - Kenny, just let me in.
- KENNY: - I can't. I'll stop.
- 1487
- 01:19:20,880 --> 01:19:22,370
- DAVID: Don't stop! You can't stop.
- 1488
- 01:19:22,560 --> 01:19:23,846
- Goddamn it, will you let go?
- 1489
- 01:19:24,040 --> 01:19:25,963
- No, no, no, no!
- You're gonna get us killed!
- 1490
- 01:19:26,160 --> 01:19:27,241
- (HORN HONKING)
- 1491
- 01:19:27,440 --> 01:19:29,841
- (ALL SHOUTING)
- 1492
- 01:19:30,040 --> 01:19:32,691
- DAVID: All right, just get out of the way.
- KENNY: I can't.
- 1493
- 01:19:33,800 --> 01:19:36,406
- (ALL SCREAMING)
- 1494
- 01:19:44,760 --> 01:19:45,841
- Is everybody okay?
- 1495
- 01:19:46,040 --> 01:19:47,849
- - Are you okay?
- - I'm fine. What...?
- 1496
- 01:19:48,040 --> 01:19:49,087
- ROSE: Fuck.
- 1497
- 01:19:51,480 --> 01:19:54,370
- Fuck!
- 1498
- 01:19:54,880 --> 01:19:56,166
- Ow! Shit! Fuck, fucking...
- 1499
- 01:19:56,320 --> 01:19:58,482
- Ow, ow! Ow, ow, ow!
- 1500
- 01:19:58,640 --> 01:20:01,450
- - Oh, my God. Fucking shit! Fuck!
- DAVID: What the hell is he doing?
- 1501
- 01:20:01,600 --> 01:20:03,728
- Fuck a donkey! It hurts so much.
- 1502
- 01:20:03,880 --> 01:20:06,201
- Settle down, man.
- What the hell's going on?
- 1503
- 01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:08,323
- Oh, my God! I'm gonna die.
- 1504
- 01:20:08,480 --> 01:20:10,482
- Kenny, listen to me.
- Calm down, all right?
- 1505
- 01:20:10,640 --> 01:20:12,483
- Not gonna die. Tell us what's going on.
- 1506
- 01:20:12,640 --> 01:20:15,211
- - Tell us what happened.
- - Fucking spider bit me, David!
- 1507
- 01:20:15,360 --> 01:20:17,931
- - What? Where did it happen?
- - Bit me on my balls.
- 1508
- 01:20:18,440 --> 01:20:21,922
- On my fucking balls. On my balls,
- on my fucking balls!
- 1509
- 01:20:22,080 --> 01:20:24,003
- Oh, God. Let me see.
- Kenny, let me see it.
- 1510
- 01:20:24,160 --> 01:20:26,731
- No. No fucking way. You're not seeing it.
- 1511
- 01:20:26,920 --> 01:20:30,641
- Come on. I can't help you unless you
- show me. Sweetie, just show it to me.
- 1512
- 01:20:30,840 --> 01:20:33,127
- Kenny, will you just man up
- and drop your pants?
- 1513
- 01:20:33,280 --> 01:20:34,964
- We've all seen a dick.
- 1514
- 01:20:40,120 --> 01:20:41,565
- DAVID: All right, let's see it.
- 1515
- 01:20:42,600 --> 01:20:43,806
- (ROSE GASPS)
- 1516
- 01:20:43,960 --> 01:20:46,486
- What? What is it?
- What does it look like?
- 1517
- 01:20:46,640 --> 01:20:48,483
- - I can't look.
- - Um...
- 1518
- 01:20:48,640 --> 01:20:51,564
- - Is it bad?
- - Hey, listen to me. It's not that bad.
- 1519
- 01:20:51,720 --> 01:20:53,882
- - Dude, it's really bad.
- - No, it isn't.
- 1520
- 01:20:54,040 --> 01:20:56,646
- - Have you seen what that... Look.
- - I'm not gonna look.
- 1521
- 01:20:56,800 --> 01:20:59,963
- - You're going to a hospital.
- - What? No. No fucking way.
- 1522
- 01:21:00,160 --> 01:21:01,321
- How bad is it?
- 1523
- 01:21:01,680 --> 01:21:04,524
- You're okay. Rub some dirt
- on it. Let's get back in the RV.
- 1524
- 01:21:04,680 --> 01:21:07,331
- No. You're going to see a doctor.
- 1525
- 01:21:07,480 --> 01:21:09,608
- No fucking way.
- No, absolutely not, Rose.
- 1526
- 01:21:09,800 --> 01:21:12,371
- He's not going to a hospital.
- We don't have time.
- 1527
- 01:21:12,520 --> 01:21:14,727
- Trust me. Kenny is fine.
- 1528
- 01:21:14,880 --> 01:21:17,406
- I can't feel my bingo.
- 1529
- 01:21:19,640 --> 01:21:22,484
- - Goddamn it, Kenny.
- - Yeah. Totally fine.
- 1530
- 01:21:22,640 --> 01:21:25,689
- - Go grab him. Grab him!
- - If he's dead, we're leaving him.
- 1531
- 01:21:32,560 --> 01:21:36,485
- Yeah, this is David Mille... David Clark,
- calling for Mr. Gurdlinger again.
- 1532
- 01:21:37,520 --> 01:21:39,204
- Yes, I'll hold.
- 1533
- 01:21:39,560 --> 01:21:42,404
- Who's my big black and white baby? Yeah.
- 1534
- 01:21:43,200 --> 01:21:45,168
- You are. Yes, you are.
- 1535
- 01:21:45,320 --> 01:21:46,731
- (BABBLING)
- 1536
- 01:21:48,320 --> 01:21:49,526
- (CELL PHONE BUZZES)
- 1537
- 01:21:49,680 --> 01:21:51,489
- - Yellow-ski.
- - Oh, hello, Brad.
- 1538
- 01:21:51,640 --> 01:21:54,450
- Where the fuck have you been?
- I left you five messages, man!
- 1539
- 01:21:54,600 --> 01:21:58,491
- David! You're alive! Cool.
- How'd that happen?
- 1540
- 01:21:58,680 --> 01:22:00,444
- Ask the real Pablo Chacon.
- 1541
- 01:22:00,640 --> 01:22:02,005
- I'm not gonna make excuses.
- 1542
- 01:22:02,440 --> 01:22:03,930
- It was kind of a dick move.
- 1543
- 01:22:04,640 --> 01:22:06,688
- - "A dick move"? A dick move!
- - Little bit.
- 1544
- 01:22:07,080 --> 01:22:08,570
- Little bit of a dick move.
- 1545
- 01:22:08,720 --> 01:22:11,451
- Well, tell you what. I'm not driving
- another fucking mile.
- 1546
- 01:22:11,600 --> 01:22:15,764
- All right? I want goddamn hazard pay from
- your ass. Otherwise, I'll turn around...
- 1547
- 01:22:15,920 --> 01:22:19,891
- ...and give this smidge of pot back to
- Chacon, along with your fucking address.
- 1548
- 01:22:20,040 --> 01:22:21,121
- Do you understand me?
- 1549
- 01:22:21,280 --> 01:22:23,521
- Sounds like you're
- threatening to double-cross me.
- 1550
- 01:22:23,680 --> 01:22:25,489
- Fucking right I am.
- 1551
- 01:22:25,640 --> 01:22:27,608
- And I'm kind of turned on right now.
- 1552
- 01:22:28,360 --> 01:22:30,966
- You make a good case for hazard pay.
- How much you want?
- 1553
- 01:22:31,120 --> 01:22:33,930
- How much? Oh, I don't know,
- half a million dollars.
- 1554
- 01:22:34,080 --> 01:22:35,366
- - How about that?
- - Done.
- 1555
- 01:22:36,560 --> 01:22:38,244
- Fucking right, it's done. Good.
- 1556
- 01:22:38,400 --> 01:22:41,324
- But I need it here by tonight
- or the deal is off.
- 1557
- 01:22:42,040 --> 01:22:43,610
- No problem. That's fine with me.
- 1558
- 01:22:43,760 --> 01:22:45,489
- Where the hell are you, anyway?
- 1559
- 01:22:45,640 --> 01:22:50,726
- We're at the Corrales Regional Medical
- Center in Buttfuck, New Mexico.
- 1560
- 01:22:50,880 --> 01:22:52,245
- - Why?
- - Why? Why?
- 1561
- 01:22:52,440 --> 01:22:56,001
- Because this goddamn Kenny kid got his
- fucking nuts bit by a giant spider.
- 1562
- 01:22:56,160 --> 01:22:59,403
- That is amazing. Will you let me know
- if he develops super powers?
- 1563
- 01:23:00,000 --> 01:23:02,082
- Listen, man, giddyup, okay? Tick-tock.
- 1564
- 01:23:02,600 --> 01:23:04,921
- Tick-tock. Okay.
- 1565
- 01:23:05,160 --> 01:23:06,321
- (PHONE BEEPS)
- 1566
- 01:23:06,480 --> 01:23:07,845
- (LINE RINGING)
- 1567
- 01:23:08,560 --> 01:23:10,961
- Hola, Pablo. Es Brad.
- 1568
- 01:23:11,120 --> 01:23:14,044
- Okay. Here me out.
- I wanna ask you something.
- 1569
- 01:23:21,080 --> 01:23:22,844
- Scottie? The doctor will see you now.
- 1570
- 01:23:26,680 --> 01:23:28,364
- SCOTTIE: Text me, girl. I gotta bounce.
- 1571
- 01:23:29,000 --> 01:23:30,206
- Know what I'm saying?
- 1572
- 01:23:32,520 --> 01:23:36,002
- Oh, God. Really? That guy?
- 1573
- 01:23:36,800 --> 01:23:39,371
- - What? He's hot.
- - Okay.
- 1574
- 01:23:40,000 --> 01:23:41,206
- "I gotta bounce."
- 1575
- 01:23:42,480 --> 01:23:44,323
- - Miller family?
- ROSE: - Yeah.
- 1576
- 01:23:44,760 --> 01:23:47,240
- Hi. Hello, how are you?
- 1577
- 01:23:47,440 --> 01:23:50,125
- Oh, great. What's the news,
- doc, huh? Can we get going?
- 1578
- 01:23:50,320 --> 01:23:52,084
- - He's about to tell us.
- - Oh, good.
- 1579
- 01:23:52,280 --> 01:23:56,046
- I'm afraid your son had a pretty severe
- allergic reaction to the spider's venom.
- 1580
- 01:23:56,240 --> 01:23:58,242
- Ooh. Too bad. Better get him home.
- Where is he?
- 1581
- 01:23:58,440 --> 01:24:02,525
- He's in a lot of pain right now, we won't
- be able to release him for a few hours yet.
- 1582
- 01:24:02,760 --> 01:24:04,603
- (DAVID GROANS)
- 1583
- 01:24:04,800 --> 01:24:07,201
- - Why?
- ROSE: - David? David, David! Stop it.
- 1584
- 01:24:08,360 --> 01:24:09,691
- Please. Continue.
- 1585
- 01:24:10,640 --> 01:24:12,449
- Uh, he's on an IV
- to get some antibiotics...
- 1586
- 01:24:12,640 --> 01:24:13,687
- (SNORES)
- 1587
- 01:24:13,880 --> 01:24:16,406
- Who the fuck cares, man?
- Okay? We got shit to do.
- 1588
- 01:24:16,600 --> 01:24:19,649
- Go get my son and bring him
- and his giant nut out here right now.
- 1589
- 01:24:19,840 --> 01:24:23,242
- Stop it. Doctor, thank you.
- I appreciate you taking care of our son.
- 1590
- 01:24:23,440 --> 01:24:27,081
- - Thank you very much.
- - Sure. You seem like a very caring father.
- 1591
- 01:24:28,720 --> 01:24:31,246
- - What is your fucking problem?
- - What?!
- 1592
- 01:24:31,440 --> 01:24:33,966
- Are you crazy? It's only a few hours.
- We'll be fine.
- 1593
- 01:24:34,160 --> 01:24:35,400
- No, we're not fine. Okay?
- 1594
- 01:24:35,600 --> 01:24:38,570
- We'll be dead in a few hours.
- You forget who's following us?
- 1595
- 01:24:38,800 --> 01:24:41,121
- Look, here's what I say we do, all right?
- 1596
- 01:24:41,600 --> 01:24:44,251
- We leave him here,
- and then we just keep going, all right?
- 1597
- 01:24:44,440 --> 01:24:47,364
- So you're saying that the three
- of us, we just leave him here.
- 1598
- 01:24:47,600 --> 01:24:51,491
- No! No, no, no. We don't leave him here.
- No. Absolutely not. No, we leave...
- 1599
- 01:24:51,720 --> 01:24:53,085
- ...with him here.
- 1600
- 01:24:56,040 --> 01:24:57,087
- Okay.
- 1601
- 01:25:03,080 --> 01:25:05,447
- You know, if we leave Kenny here,
- it really isn't...
- 1602
- 01:25:06,120 --> 01:25:07,167
- Ah.
- 1603
- 01:25:07,360 --> 01:25:10,091
- No. I don't know where I was going
- with that. That's stupid.
- 1604
- 01:25:10,280 --> 01:25:11,566
- Seriously.
- 1605
- 01:25:11,760 --> 01:25:13,762
- (BANGING ON DOOR)
- 1606
- 01:25:14,000 --> 01:25:15,365
- - What's that?
- - I don't know.
- 1607
- 01:25:15,560 --> 01:25:18,325
- CASEY: Don't answer it! It's for me!
- - What?
- 1608
- 01:25:19,280 --> 01:25:20,327
- What's up, dawg?
- 1609
- 01:25:20,760 --> 01:25:22,330
- Not much, dawg. What's up with you?
- 1610
- 01:25:22,520 --> 01:25:24,488
- Here to pick up Casey,
- know what I'm saying?
- 1611
- 01:25:24,720 --> 01:25:27,200
- I'm awake and I speak English,
- so, yeah, I do know.
- 1612
- 01:25:28,360 --> 01:25:31,569
- - What's your name, man?
- - Scottie P., you know what I'm saying? Ha-ha.
- 1613
- 01:25:32,360 --> 01:25:34,124
- Again, I do know what you're saying.
- 1614
- 01:25:34,320 --> 01:25:36,800
- But I appreciate you continuing
- to check in with me.
- 1615
- 01:25:37,000 --> 01:25:39,606
- - Hi! Bye. We're gonna go.
- - Whoa, wait!
- 1616
- 01:25:39,800 --> 01:25:42,041
- - Where do you think you're going?
- - Out.
- 1617
- 01:25:42,680 --> 01:25:44,682
- I have just made lunch.
- 1618
- 01:25:44,880 --> 01:25:47,201
- - When are you coming back?
- - I don't know, later.
- 1619
- 01:25:47,400 --> 01:25:49,289
- DAVID: No! Hey, stop! Stop, listen to me.
- 1620
- 01:25:49,480 --> 01:25:51,289
- Once Kenny is ready, we're out of here.
- 1621
- 01:25:51,480 --> 01:25:54,962
- We will leave with or without you.
- If you're not here, we're gone. Got it?
- 1622
- 01:25:55,160 --> 01:25:57,242
- Okay, fine. That's totally fine.
- 1623
- 01:25:57,440 --> 01:26:00,364
- Wait. Come here.
- I'd like to have a chat with your friend.
- 1624
- 01:26:00,560 --> 01:26:03,006
- - Are you kidding me?
- - I am not kidding you.
- 1625
- 01:26:03,200 --> 01:26:04,611
- Would you please have a seat.
- 1626
- 01:26:05,720 --> 01:26:07,006
- What is going on?
- 1627
- 01:26:13,000 --> 01:26:17,210
- So, Scottie P.,
- what exactly do you do for a living?
- 1628
- 01:26:17,480 --> 01:26:20,450
- - Oh, Mom!
- SCOTTIE: - I work for A & J Amusements.
- 1629
- 01:26:20,600 --> 01:26:23,080
- I'm rocking that Monkey Maze,
- you know what I'm saying?
- 1630
- 01:26:23,280 --> 01:26:27,569
- - What the hell is the Monkey Maze?
- - Oh, it's like a Terrifying Deathtrap...
- 1631
- 01:26:27,720 --> 01:26:29,131
- ...but for little kids.
- 1632
- 01:26:29,320 --> 01:26:31,561
- You're working at the fair. You're a carny.
- 1633
- 01:26:31,720 --> 01:26:34,326
- No, I drive a motorcycle.
- 1634
- 01:26:34,480 --> 01:26:35,845
- - Mm-hm.
- - Mm-hm.
- 1635
- 01:26:36,040 --> 01:26:37,246
- Yeah.
- 1636
- 01:26:37,400 --> 01:26:41,325
- What about you guys? Where you, uh,
- stopping in from, you know what I'm saying?
- 1637
- 01:26:41,480 --> 01:26:43,482
- - Uh, D-town.
- - Oh, Detroit.
- 1638
- 01:26:43,640 --> 01:26:46,086
- No, no, no. The other one.
- 1639
- 01:26:46,240 --> 01:26:47,969
- D-town. The other D-town.
- 1640
- 01:26:48,120 --> 01:26:50,487
- - Denver...?
- - That's the one. There you go.
- 1641
- 01:26:50,680 --> 01:26:52,080
- - Colorado.
- DAVID: - That's the one.
- 1642
- 01:26:52,200 --> 01:26:54,407
- Yeah, I love my Rockies,
- you know what I'm saying?
- 1643
- 01:26:54,600 --> 01:26:56,682
- Oh, you like the Rockies?
- You're a baseball fan?
- 1644
- 01:26:57,600 --> 01:26:59,967
- - Uh, no, the mountains.
- - Of course.
- 1645
- 01:27:01,360 --> 01:27:02,805
- Hey, those are cool tats, man.
- 1646
- 01:27:02,960 --> 01:27:05,122
- Oh, for real. Thank you, bro.
- You see the cobra?
- 1647
- 01:27:05,520 --> 01:27:07,682
- - What's this? The one right there?
- - Oh, this?
- 1648
- 01:27:07,840 --> 01:27:09,285
- DAVID: Uh-huh.
- 1649
- 01:27:09,440 --> 01:27:11,363
- That's my credo. "No ragrets."
- 1650
- 01:27:11,520 --> 01:27:14,410
- Mm-hm. How about that.
- 1651
- 01:27:15,120 --> 01:27:17,088
- - You have no regrets?
- - Nope.
- 1652
- 01:27:17,240 --> 01:27:20,881
- - Not one?
- - Nope. Ha, ha.
- 1653
- 01:27:21,040 --> 01:27:23,486
- I wish I did. To talk about something.
- 1654
- 01:27:23,640 --> 01:27:24,721
- Not one regret, huh?
- 1655
- 01:27:24,920 --> 01:27:27,082
- That's how I been living my whole life.
- 1656
- 01:27:27,240 --> 01:27:29,288
- I went to a tattoo artist, I was like:
- 1657
- 01:27:29,440 --> 01:27:31,647
- "This how I live.
- Can you put that on my body?"
- 1658
- 01:27:31,800 --> 01:27:33,325
- - And he did it.
- - Dad.
- 1659
- 01:27:33,480 --> 01:27:36,609
- - Not even a single letter?
- - No, I can't think of one.
- 1660
- 01:27:36,760 --> 01:27:39,604
- - I love all the letters, know what I'm saying?
- - Yeah.
- 1661
- 01:27:39,760 --> 01:27:41,808
- A lot of letters in the alphabet.
- How many?
- 1662
- 01:27:41,960 --> 01:27:44,930
- - It's in the 20s.
- - It's definitely in the 20s, I agree.
- 1663
- 01:27:45,080 --> 01:27:47,560
- Twenty-six, I think, if you count Y.
- 1664
- 01:27:47,720 --> 01:27:50,803
- - Do you have any questions for us, Scottie P?
- - Dad.
- 1665
- 01:27:51,520 --> 01:27:54,444
- - How did you make her so hot?
- - What's that?
- 1666
- 01:27:54,920 --> 01:27:57,651
- - Uh, Casey.
- - Aw, that's very sweet of you.
- 1667
- 01:27:57,800 --> 01:28:00,167
- He wants to know
- how we made Casey so hot.
- 1668
- 01:28:00,320 --> 01:28:03,608
- - It's, uh...
- - You guys had to...
- 1669
- 01:28:03,760 --> 01:28:06,286
- DAVID: - What'd you ask us?
- - ...seminate, like, each other?
- 1670
- 01:28:06,440 --> 01:28:08,283
- Uh... Sorry?
- 1671
- 01:28:08,440 --> 01:28:11,159
- (MOUTHS) - Oh, my God.
- - Like, is there a way to make them, like...
- 1672
- 01:28:11,160 --> 01:28:12,286
- ...attractive? Like, kids?
- 1673
- 01:28:13,440 --> 01:28:15,602
- - Doggie style. Know what I mean?
- SCOTTIE: - Dope.
- 1674
- 01:28:15,760 --> 01:28:17,250
- (LAUGHS)
- 1675
- 01:28:17,440 --> 01:28:21,240
- - Dad.
- - Well, I love him. I think he's great.
- 1676
- 01:28:21,440 --> 01:28:24,125
- A real winner.
- If I were you, I wouldn't use protection.
- 1677
- 01:28:24,280 --> 01:28:25,805
- Scottie P., you're the man.
- 1678
- 01:28:25,960 --> 01:28:27,920
- - Yo, for real. Thanks, man.
- - We're leaving. Bye!
- 1679
- 01:28:28,680 --> 01:28:31,120
- - Nice meeting you. You do you, Scottie P.
- SCOTTIE: - You too.
- 1680
- 01:28:33,880 --> 01:28:35,723
- (ENGINE REVVING)
- 1681
- 01:28:37,600 --> 01:28:39,329
- ROSE: Casey, make good choices!
- 1682
- 01:28:42,400 --> 01:28:44,004
- Come on, she's gonna be fine.
- 1683
- 01:28:44,200 --> 01:28:46,885
- Tattooed kid on a motorcycle, no helmet.
- 1684
- 01:28:47,600 --> 01:28:49,568
- Actually, she might already be pregnant.
- 1685
- 01:28:56,320 --> 01:28:59,051
- I cannot believe her.
- Where the hell is she?
- 1686
- 01:28:59,240 --> 01:29:02,926
- Look who is concerned about someone
- other than themselves.
- 1687
- 01:29:03,120 --> 01:29:05,088
- What? I just want to get back on
- the road.
- 1688
- 01:29:05,280 --> 01:29:06,645
- No, I know.
- 1689
- 01:29:07,000 --> 01:29:08,764
- That kid was a dickhead, huh?
- 1690
- 01:29:08,960 --> 01:29:10,291
- - Right?
- - Know what I'm saying?
- 1691
- 01:29:10,480 --> 01:29:13,404
- - Ha! Jerk.
- - Unbelievable.
- 1692
- 01:29:13,600 --> 01:29:15,921
- Must get her shitty taste in men
- from her mother.
- 1693
- 01:29:19,400 --> 01:29:21,721
- I'm sorry. It was a cheap shot.
- 1694
- 01:29:21,920 --> 01:29:24,366
- Cheap shot, okay? I'm taking it back.
- 1695
- 01:29:25,320 --> 01:29:28,847
- I'm sure your boyfriend Jimmy
- is very nice.
- 1696
- 01:29:29,040 --> 01:29:31,884
- He seems like a very good guy.
- 1697
- 01:29:32,520 --> 01:29:34,841
- Well, he's not. He left.
- 1698
- 01:29:35,320 --> 01:29:38,642
- Maxed out all my credit cards,
- cleaned out my bank account...
- 1699
- 01:29:38,840 --> 01:29:40,251
- ...jetted out of town.
- 1700
- 01:29:40,440 --> 01:29:45,002
- He stole my favorite mug. Which was
- a pretty shitty thing to do. Even for him.
- 1701
- 01:29:45,200 --> 01:29:47,646
- - I'm really sorry about that. That sucks.
- - Whatever.
- 1702
- 01:29:47,880 --> 01:29:50,804
- That's what you get
- for dating a guy who dates strippers.
- 1703
- 01:29:51,360 --> 01:29:52,407
- Ah, come on.
- 1704
- 01:29:52,600 --> 01:29:54,762
- You're a lot more than that, Rose,
- and you know it.
- 1705
- 01:29:55,960 --> 01:29:57,962
- (CHUCKLES)
- 1706
- 01:29:58,200 --> 01:30:01,044
- - What?
- - Rose is not even my real name.
- 1707
- 01:30:03,000 --> 01:30:04,331
- What's your real name?
- 1708
- 01:30:05,720 --> 01:30:06,926
- Sarah.
- 1709
- 01:30:07,680 --> 01:30:08,806
- With an "h"?
- 1710
- 01:30:09,160 --> 01:30:11,481
- Yep. Right there at the end.
- 1711
- 01:30:11,680 --> 01:30:13,250
- It's the best way to spell it.
- 1712
- 01:30:13,440 --> 01:30:16,330
- - That's what my mother thought. Heh.
- - Heh.
- 1713
- 01:30:18,400 --> 01:30:20,209
- Well, David's not my real name either.
- 1714
- 01:30:20,640 --> 01:30:23,371
- - Really?
- - I'm being serious.
- 1715
- 01:30:24,680 --> 01:30:27,331
- Wow. So you're being ser...
- 1716
- 01:30:27,560 --> 01:30:30,564
- Well, so then, what's your real name?
- 1717
- 01:30:30,920 --> 01:30:32,046
- Barbara.
- 1718
- 01:30:32,240 --> 01:30:34,481
- - Barbara?
- - Yeah, named after my mom.
- 1719
- 01:30:34,680 --> 01:30:36,967
- Oh, so, what are you, like, a Barbara Jr.?
- 1720
- 01:30:38,320 --> 01:30:40,322
- - You're Barbara Jr.
- - You got it. Yeah, yeah.
- 1721
- 01:30:40,520 --> 01:30:43,171
- My friends in high school
- and grade school called me Babs.
- 1722
- 01:30:43,360 --> 01:30:44,885
- Oh, scarred childhood.
- 1723
- 01:30:45,120 --> 01:30:49,045
- Not really, not at all. I mean, I was in
- musical theater, so I was actually revered.
- 1724
- 01:30:50,400 --> 01:30:51,447
- Very funny.
- 1725
- 01:30:53,360 --> 01:30:54,850
- You have a hair...
- 1726
- 01:30:56,920 --> 01:30:58,365
- Yank, or put behind the ear?
- 1727
- 01:30:58,560 --> 01:30:59,800
- Guess we could...
- 1728
- 01:31:00,640 --> 01:31:01,766
- ...tuck it back there.
- 1729
- 01:31:03,440 --> 01:31:04,680
- (DOOR OPENS)
- 1730
- 01:31:04,880 --> 01:31:06,962
- Whoa. What's going on in here?
- 1731
- 01:31:07,560 --> 01:31:10,291
- We should ask you the same thing,
- young lady! Huh?
- 1732
- 01:31:10,520 --> 01:31:12,522
- - We've been worried sick.
- - That's right.
- 1733
- 01:31:12,720 --> 01:31:14,882
- Why are you guys talking like that?
- 1734
- 01:31:15,200 --> 01:31:16,281
- Shit, is someone here?
- 1735
- 01:31:16,480 --> 01:31:19,450
- Yeah! Yeah, us.
- We're here. That's who's here.
- 1736
- 01:31:19,760 --> 01:31:22,206
- We didn't know if you were dead
- in a ditch! Huh?
- 1737
- 01:31:22,400 --> 01:31:24,040
- ROSE: You couldn't have called?
- Something?
- 1738
- 01:31:24,200 --> 01:31:27,124
- Or send one of those text messages
- you're always sending out?
- 1739
- 01:31:27,320 --> 01:31:31,450
- "Hey, it's me, Casey, I'm not dead in a
- ditch." LOL, picture of a whale, #YOLO.
- 1740
- 01:31:31,760 --> 01:31:33,250
- - Anything!
- - Okay.
- 1741
- 01:31:33,760 --> 01:31:35,205
- Fine! Whatever!
- 1742
- 01:31:35,400 --> 01:31:37,050
- Sorry.
- 1743
- 01:31:37,240 --> 01:31:38,480
- - Whoa!
- - Thank you!
- 1744
- 01:31:38,720 --> 01:31:40,561
- ROSE: Was that so hard?
- DAVID: Appreciate that.
- 1745
- 01:31:40,720 --> 01:31:43,883
- - She learned a new word, Rose.
- ROSE: - Thank God. "I'm sorry."
- 1746
- 01:31:44,360 --> 01:31:46,203
- Un-fucking-believable.
- 1747
- 01:31:46,640 --> 01:31:48,005
- It's gonna be great.
- 1748
- 01:31:48,920 --> 01:31:51,048
- Oh! There he is. Kenny!
- 1749
- 01:31:51,240 --> 01:31:53,720
- - Okay, let's go.
- - Oh, my God, you look so much better.
- 1750
- 01:31:53,920 --> 01:31:56,161
- - Doesn't he?
- - Like a thousand bucks. Let's go.
- 1751
- 01:31:59,000 --> 01:32:01,241
- - Come on, we gotta hurry. Come on!
- - Take it easy!
- 1752
- 01:32:01,440 --> 01:32:03,283
- - Will you just relax?!
- - Look, I can't...
- 1753
- 01:32:04,120 --> 01:32:05,167
- ROSE: - Oh, great.
- - Aah!
- 1754
- 01:32:05,360 --> 01:32:07,806
- ROSE: Kenny.
- KENNY: That's my elbow. Oh...
- 1755
- 01:32:08,040 --> 01:32:10,247
- ROSE: - Are you okay?
- - I think so.
- 1756
- 01:32:10,440 --> 01:32:13,091
- Look what happens when you
- run around like a crazy person.
- 1757
- 01:32:13,280 --> 01:32:16,284
- What do mean? He's fine.
- Come on, Ken-doll, hop up. Here we go.
- 1758
- 01:32:16,480 --> 01:32:18,562
- - What's wrong with you?
- - What's wrong with me?
- 1759
- 01:32:18,800 --> 01:32:21,406
- - David!
- - Look, this job has a deadline...
- 1760
- 01:32:21,600 --> 01:32:23,489
- ...and it's in four fucking hours.
- 1761
- 01:32:23,720 --> 01:32:27,441
- If you think I'm gonna lose half a million
- dollars because of Kenny's boo-boos...
- 1762
- 01:32:27,680 --> 01:32:29,967
- - ...then you're out of your mind.
- - Whoa. Wait a second.
- 1763
- 01:32:30,680 --> 01:32:33,923
- You're making half a million dollars
- on this deal?
- 1764
- 01:32:36,240 --> 01:32:40,245
- - Uh, roughly.
- - I cannot believe you.
- 1765
- 01:32:40,440 --> 01:32:41,885
- Listen to me. I can explain.
- 1766
- 01:32:42,080 --> 01:32:47,291
- You are making $500,000
- and you were only gonna pay me 30?
- 1767
- 01:32:47,480 --> 01:32:51,041
- You're getting 30 grand?
- I'm getting a thousand!
- 1768
- 01:32:51,560 --> 01:32:53,085
- Wait, you guys are getting paid?
- 1769
- 01:32:53,280 --> 01:32:54,725
- ROSE: - You're a liar.
- - No, no, no.
- 1770
- 01:32:54,960 --> 01:32:57,042
- - We want to renegotiate.
- - No. No way.
- 1771
- 01:32:57,240 --> 01:32:58,601
- - What? David.
- DAVID: - No. No way.
- 1772
- 01:32:58,800 --> 01:33:02,930
- You made your deal with me, I made my
- deal with Brad. We're getting outta here.
- 1773
- 01:33:03,880 --> 01:33:07,248
- See? Good. Casey gets it.
- We're not renegotiating now. Let's go.
- 1774
- 01:33:07,440 --> 01:33:11,240
- I believe we are, right now, because you
- wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for us.
- 1775
- 01:33:11,480 --> 01:33:12,641
- You're right about that.
- 1776
- 01:33:12,840 --> 01:33:15,571
- I'd be in Denver now if it wasn't
- for you slowing me down.
- 1777
- 01:33:15,760 --> 01:33:19,162
- Are you shitting...? Slowing you down?
- What the hell are you talking...?
- 1778
- 01:33:19,800 --> 01:33:22,007
- Whoa, where the hell are you going?
- Hey, hey!
- 1779
- 01:33:22,240 --> 01:33:24,049
- Hey, I said where are you going?
- 1780
- 01:33:24,280 --> 01:33:26,328
- You know what? You leave,
- you get nothing.
- 1781
- 01:33:26,520 --> 01:33:27,965
- I don't want your money, okay?
- 1782
- 01:33:28,200 --> 01:33:31,044
- Casey, come back.
- We have to stay together.
- 1783
- 01:33:31,240 --> 01:33:32,765
- - Come on!
- - Why?
- 1784
- 01:33:33,520 --> 01:33:34,965
- Because we're a family? Huh?
- 1785
- 01:33:35,400 --> 01:33:38,404
- You want to spend Christmas together?
- Help me with my homework?
- 1786
- 01:33:38,720 --> 01:33:41,690
- Please. This whole thing
- has been a total joke.
- 1787
- 01:33:42,720 --> 01:33:45,883
- Oh, no, I'll tell you what the joke is!
- You want to know what the...?
- 1788
- 01:33:46,880 --> 01:33:48,006
- The j...
- 1789
- 01:33:48,440 --> 01:33:50,090
- I'm not gonna tell you the joke!
- 1790
- 01:33:50,280 --> 01:33:53,489
- You don't deserve to hear the joke!
- Let's go.
- 1791
- 01:33:53,680 --> 01:33:56,081
- - I don't think you knew the joke.
- - I knew a joke.
- 1792
- 01:33:56,280 --> 01:33:57,964
- We have to go back and get her.
- 1793
- 01:33:58,160 --> 01:34:00,686
- What? Are you kidding me?
- She left! Screw her, okay?
- 1794
- 01:34:00,880 --> 01:34:02,564
- Are you coming with me or not, Rose?
- 1795
- 01:34:04,040 --> 01:34:07,442
- Fine. I'll slide your check
- under your door. Kenny, let's go.
- 1796
- 01:34:09,200 --> 01:34:10,725
- Kenny, come on! Let's go, man.
- 1797
- 01:34:10,920 --> 01:34:13,526
- We can't leave her, David. It's not right.
- 1798
- 01:34:16,240 --> 01:34:17,605
- - You know what?
- - What?
- 1799
- 01:34:18,000 --> 01:34:19,764
- You all deserve each other.
- 1800
- 01:34:22,680 --> 01:34:24,011
- Da... Wha...?
- 1801
- 01:34:35,000 --> 01:34:36,331
- He'll come back.
- 1802
- 01:34:37,040 --> 01:34:38,087
- Right?
- 1803
- 01:34:59,320 --> 01:35:00,367
- SCOTTIE: Yo, girl!
- 1804
- 01:35:02,200 --> 01:35:04,567
- - I got your text. What's up?
- - Hey.
- 1805
- 01:35:04,760 --> 01:35:06,000
- Are you alone?
- 1806
- 01:35:06,520 --> 01:35:10,411
- Yeah. You think we can go someplace
- private and talk?
- 1807
- 01:35:11,280 --> 01:35:14,727
- I know just the spot,
- you know what I'm saying? Heh-heh.
- 1808
- 01:35:15,360 --> 01:35:18,045
- (BRAD SINGING SCALES)
- 1809
- 01:35:20,320 --> 01:35:23,164
- - A little better.
- - See, you're not in synch with what I'm doing.
- 1810
- 01:35:23,360 --> 01:35:26,284
- I'm just playing a major scale,
- but, um, we can move it down.
- 1811
- 01:35:26,440 --> 01:35:27,726
- - Let's move it.
- - Shitty scale.
- 1812
- 01:35:27,880 --> 01:35:29,370
- Stop talking. Just shut the fuck up.
- 1813
- 01:35:29,520 --> 01:35:30,931
- (PHONE BUZZING)
- 1814
- 01:35:31,480 --> 01:35:33,005
- - Hey, what's up?
- - Hey, Brad.
- 1815
- 01:35:33,200 --> 01:35:36,249
- I'm just getting some singing lessons
- from my main man Ben Folds Five.
- 1816
- 01:35:36,400 --> 01:35:39,802
- - Ain't that right, Ben Folds Five?
- - My name is Ben Folds.
- 1817
- 01:35:40,000 --> 01:35:41,729
- "Five" is the name of the band.
- 1818
- 01:35:41,920 --> 01:35:43,649
- You're fucking with me. I love it.
- 1819
- 01:35:43,840 --> 01:35:47,128
- You gotta meet this guy.
- Benji Five is a laugh riot.
- 1820
- 01:35:47,280 --> 01:35:49,160
- Remember that song "Brick"
- we used to listen to?
- 1821
- 01:35:49,280 --> 01:35:53,444
- (SINGING)
- She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly
- 1822
- 01:35:53,640 --> 01:35:56,405
- It's... I've got... It's that guy.
- I fucking got that guy.
- 1823
- 01:35:56,600 --> 01:35:58,170
- He's like my personal bitch.
- 1824
- 01:35:58,320 --> 01:36:00,607
- - Listen, is everything okay?
- - Yeah.
- 1825
- 01:36:00,760 --> 01:36:02,762
- Yeah, yeah. Uh, things are fine.
- 1826
- 01:36:02,920 --> 01:36:05,890
- I'm about 200 miles away.
- I'll be there in three hours, all right?
- 1827
- 01:36:06,040 --> 01:36:09,567
- - All right. Peace.
- - Agh, fucking asshole.
- 1828
- 01:36:09,720 --> 01:36:11,051
- Scales. Let's do this.
- 1829
- 01:36:11,240 --> 01:36:12,605
- This gig sucks.
- 1830
- 01:36:12,760 --> 01:36:14,808
- Don't talk to me like that.
- I will have you killed.
- 1831
- 01:36:14,960 --> 01:36:16,803
- And no one will miss
- your fucking nerd music.
- 1832
- 01:36:21,640 --> 01:36:23,802
- (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)
- 1833
- 01:36:26,400 --> 01:36:28,164
- MAN: (ON RADIO)
- Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!
- 1834
- 01:36:28,360 --> 01:36:30,010
- Great. That's loud.
- 1835
- 01:36:31,200 --> 01:36:34,010
- (TLC'S "WATERFALLS"
- PLAYING ON RADIO)
- 1836
- 01:36:34,200 --> 01:36:36,487
- (CHUCKLES)
- 1837
- 01:36:36,720 --> 01:36:37,926
- (MUSIC STOPS)
- 1838
- 01:36:38,120 --> 01:36:41,329
- Yeah, nice try, radio. Nice try. Heh.
- 1839
- 01:36:42,000 --> 01:36:43,764
- Okay. Ahem.
- 1840
- 01:36:43,960 --> 01:36:45,166
- Let's get there.
- 1841
- 01:36:47,760 --> 01:36:49,569
- Hoo.
- 1842
- 01:36:51,000 --> 01:36:52,240
- Quiet.
- 1843
- 01:36:59,120 --> 01:37:00,770
- And I knew better too.
- 1844
- 01:37:01,000 --> 01:37:03,321
- But we were all on the road together...
- 1845
- 01:37:03,520 --> 01:37:06,330
- ...and it got kind of fun, you know?
- 1846
- 01:37:07,160 --> 01:37:08,207
- Yeah. Uh-huh.
- 1847
- 01:37:08,800 --> 01:37:11,644
- And I started thinking of us as kind of
- like this...
- 1848
- 01:37:13,120 --> 01:37:14,724
- Whatever, it's stupid.
- 1849
- 01:37:15,760 --> 01:37:18,047
- - Fuck them.
- - Yeah, fuck them.
- 1850
- 01:37:18,240 --> 01:37:22,484
- Yo, right now, girl, Scottie P. is gonna make
- you feel real good, know what I'm saying?
- 1851
- 01:37:22,680 --> 01:37:25,047
- - Ha-ha.
- - Uh, heh.
- 1852
- 01:37:25,240 --> 01:37:28,369
- I'm sorry, I'm just feeling kind of cry-ey
- and that...
- 1853
- 01:37:29,520 --> 01:37:31,363
- - I'm just gonna go, okay?
- - Come on, girl.
- 1854
- 01:37:31,560 --> 01:37:33,881
- - You texted me. You know what's up.
- - Scottie.
- 1855
- 01:37:34,080 --> 01:37:35,320
- ROSE: Hey!
- 1856
- 01:37:35,520 --> 01:37:36,646
- Get your hands off of her!
- 1857
- 01:37:36,840 --> 01:37:38,171
- Come here, Casey.
- 1858
- 01:37:38,600 --> 01:37:40,204
- You put your hands on her again...
- 1859
- 01:37:40,400 --> 01:37:43,085
- ...I will rip that fucking tattoo
- right off of your chest.
- 1860
- 01:37:43,280 --> 01:37:44,361
- You know what I'm saying?
- 1861
- 01:37:44,560 --> 01:37:46,608
- - Oh, really, bitch?
- - Yeah, bitch.
- 1862
- 01:37:46,800 --> 01:37:49,883
- You know what? Why don't you leave
- the girls alone, man.
- 1863
- 01:37:50,080 --> 01:37:51,684
- What are you gonna do, eyebrows?
- 1864
- 01:37:53,240 --> 01:37:54,685
- One...
- 1865
- 01:37:55,400 --> 01:37:56,640
- ...two...
- 1866
- 01:37:56,840 --> 01:37:58,080
- (SCOTTIE GROANS)
- 1867
- 01:37:58,280 --> 01:38:00,408
- SCOTTIE: Ow! Broke my nose!
- 1868
- 01:38:01,920 --> 01:38:04,764
- You're an aggressive woman.
- Know what I'm saying?
- 1869
- 01:38:07,240 --> 01:38:08,287
- Are you okay?
- 1870
- 01:38:08,520 --> 01:38:11,000
- I'm fine. That was awesome.
- You fucking decked him!
- 1871
- 01:38:11,200 --> 01:38:13,521
- I've dealt with handsy
- assholes like him at work.
- 1872
- 01:38:13,760 --> 01:38:15,000
- Let's just get out of here.
- 1873
- 01:38:15,240 --> 01:38:17,004
- Thanks for the backup.
- Why the counting?
- 1874
- 01:38:17,240 --> 01:38:19,447
- If you're gonna punch someone,
- punch them on one.
- 1875
- 01:38:19,640 --> 01:38:21,005
- Well, David told me to count.
- 1876
- 01:38:21,240 --> 01:38:23,481
- David? David hasn't punched
- anybody ever.
- 1877
- 01:38:28,320 --> 01:38:30,243
- I think this Way. Exit.
- 1878
- 01:38:31,040 --> 01:38:33,964
- (HUMS FANFARE)
- 1879
- 01:38:34,120 --> 01:38:36,691
- I have returned.
- 1880
- 01:38:36,840 --> 01:38:38,365
- (CONTINUES FANFARE)
- 1881
- 01:38:38,520 --> 01:38:40,807
- Ha-ha-ha. So here's what happened, okay?
- 1882
- 01:38:40,960 --> 01:38:46,126
- I'm out on the open road, just by myself, right?
- And I'm just beelining it to a huge payday.
- 1883
- 01:38:46,280 --> 01:38:48,681
- And I start to realize something:
- it's boring in here.
- 1884
- 01:38:48,840 --> 01:38:50,800
- So I thought,
- "You know what you gotta do, dummy?"
- 1885
- 01:38:50,920 --> 01:38:54,527
- "You gotta turn this RV around
- and go back and get those dip sticks."
- 1886
- 01:38:54,680 --> 01:38:57,923
- Heh. I'm just kidding,
- you're not dip sticks.
- 1887
- 01:38:58,080 --> 01:38:59,889
- What do you say we go home?
- Come on, let's go.
- 1888
- 01:39:00,040 --> 01:39:01,849
- Hey, David? Go fuck yourself.
- 1889
- 01:39:02,480 --> 01:39:04,289
- Uh...? Ha!
- 1890
- 01:39:04,880 --> 01:39:07,360
- "Go fuck yourself."
- "You go fuck yourself."
- 1891
- 01:39:07,520 --> 01:39:12,048
- Rose, you say, "Go fuck yourself." Then
- Kenny's like, "I don't want to fuck anybody."
- 1892
- 01:39:12,200 --> 01:39:15,283
- This is what I miss, right?
- The Ping-Pong action, the repartee.
- 1893
- 01:39:15,440 --> 01:39:19,729
- Come on, guys. Let's get out of here, go home.
- Get in the RV, go home, get out of here.
- 1894
- 01:39:19,880 --> 01:39:22,201
- Come on, let's go!
- 1895
- 01:39:22,360 --> 01:39:25,125
- - Whoa, hey, hold on. Where you going?
- - Are you serious?
- 1896
- 01:39:25,280 --> 01:39:27,203
- Look, look, look. Okay.
- 1897
- 01:39:27,360 --> 01:39:29,806
- I know what this is about, and I get it.
- 1898
- 01:39:29,960 --> 01:39:33,009
- All right?
- We're gonna split the $500,000.
- 1899
- 01:39:33,160 --> 01:39:37,051
- Evenly. Betwixt the four of us.
- 1900
- 01:39:37,440 --> 01:39:40,489
- You guys get what I'm saying here?
- Kenny, you wanna be like this: "Pfft!"
- 1901
- 01:39:40,640 --> 01:39:44,087
- Like you're from... Right?
- That's a lot of video games, kiddo.
- 1902
- 01:39:44,240 --> 01:39:47,642
- All right, Casey, you can buy a house,
- and run away from it.
- 1903
- 01:39:48,040 --> 01:39:50,520
- You know what I mean? Like, whatever.
- You get $125,000.
- 1904
- 01:39:50,680 --> 01:39:51,806
- You get $125,000.
- 1905
- 01:39:52,000 --> 01:39:54,685
- You get a... I mean, I'm like
- fucking Oprah here. You know?
- 1906
- 01:39:54,880 --> 01:39:57,486
- If she was a white dude at a carnival. Heh.
- 1907
- 01:39:57,640 --> 01:40:00,211
- Come on, guys. Let's get in the RV...
- 1908
- 01:40:00,360 --> 01:40:04,001
- ...and take our butts back to Denver where
- we're gonna be rich and we're gonna get paid.
- 1909
- 01:40:04,160 --> 01:40:05,161
- (HUMMING)
- 1910
- 01:40:05,320 --> 01:40:07,766
- - Come on, come on.
- - Uh, David, listen.
- 1911
- 01:40:07,960 --> 01:40:10,964
- You misled us. You left us.
- 1912
- 01:40:11,120 --> 01:40:15,045
- And then you come waltzing back in here all...
- I don't know what the hell that was...
- 1913
- 01:40:15,200 --> 01:40:17,680
- ...and you just expect
- that we all just forget about it.
- 1914
- 01:40:17,840 --> 01:40:20,571
- What's wrong with you?
- 1915
- 01:40:21,400 --> 01:40:22,447
- How do we trust you?
- 1916
- 01:40:24,480 --> 01:40:26,323
- (GROANS)
- 1917
- 01:40:26,480 --> 01:40:29,404
- Okay, look, what do you want?
- Do you want me to beg?
- 1918
- 01:40:29,600 --> 01:40:31,170
- Kids? What do you think?
- 1919
- 01:40:31,320 --> 01:40:34,051
- - That would make me feel a lot better.
- - Works for me. Sure.
- 1920
- 01:40:36,520 --> 01:40:38,124
- You're joking.
- 1921
- 01:40:39,920 --> 01:40:41,046
- Wha...?
- 1922
- 01:40:41,440 --> 01:40:44,569
- You really want me to get on my knees?
- And beg you?
- 1923
- 01:40:45,360 --> 01:40:47,203
- It's a good thing I'm wearing
- my begging pants.
- 1924
- 01:40:47,360 --> 01:40:49,567
- I usually only do this before sex.
- 1925
- 01:40:51,080 --> 01:40:53,845
- Okay, okay, I'm going, I'm going.
- Please, please.
- 1926
- 01:40:54,000 --> 01:40:56,970
- Ahem. Let's do it. Here we go.
- 1927
- 01:40:57,120 --> 01:40:58,167
- Okay! To the RV, let's go.
- 1928
- 01:40:58,560 --> 01:40:59,607
- Come on, Babs.
- 1929
- 01:40:59,800 --> 01:41:01,404
- (LAUGHS)
- 1930
- 01:41:02,960 --> 01:41:05,440
- DAVID: Whoa, whoa. Slow down.
- There's clowns everywhere.
- 1931
- 01:41:05,640 --> 01:41:06,801
- Here, let Pops get in here.
- 1932
- 01:41:07,000 --> 01:41:09,287
- We're right down here.
- I parked it next to an RV.
- 1933
- 01:41:09,480 --> 01:41:12,051
- (EDIE & MELISSA
- SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY)
- 1934
- 01:41:12,240 --> 01:41:14,004
- (EDIE GASPS)
- 1935
- 01:41:14,200 --> 01:41:15,486
- - Melissa.
- - Kenny.
- 1936
- 01:41:15,680 --> 01:41:17,250
- - Rose!
- - Edie.
- 1937
- 01:41:17,440 --> 01:41:18,646
- - Shit.
- - Shit.
- 1938
- 01:41:18,880 --> 01:41:21,201
- I never get used to that language.
- 1939
- 01:41:22,280 --> 01:41:26,171
- What in the H-E-L-L
- are you people doing here?
- 1940
- 01:41:26,480 --> 01:41:27,606
- Uh... Uh, uh...
- 1941
- 01:41:27,800 --> 01:41:30,121
- - We came to see the fireworks.
- - Yeah. Fireworks.
- 1942
- 01:41:30,600 --> 01:41:34,810
- Us too! That's so weird!
- They're supposed to be amazing here.
- 1943
- 01:41:35,000 --> 01:41:36,445
- - Melissa, can we talk?
- - No.
- 1944
- 01:41:36,640 --> 01:41:38,404
- - Mom, come on, let's go.
- - Melissa!
- 1945
- 01:41:38,800 --> 01:41:40,882
- Why are you being so rude?
- 1946
- 01:41:41,080 --> 01:41:43,686
- Do you have your period?
- Do you need a tampin?
- 1947
- 01:41:43,880 --> 01:41:46,884
- Mom, I don't need a tampin.
- I don't want to be near these people.
- 1948
- 01:41:47,120 --> 01:41:49,248
- - Kenny. Let's go.
- - We should get out of here.
- 1949
- 01:41:49,560 --> 01:41:52,484
- - What happened last night was wrong.
- - Oh, boy.
- 1950
- 01:41:52,680 --> 01:41:54,205
- (GASPS)
- 1951
- 01:41:54,400 --> 01:41:56,004
- Oh, my God, she knows.
- 1952
- 01:41:57,720 --> 01:41:59,802
- My daughter knows what we've done.
- 1953
- 01:42:00,880 --> 01:42:04,043
- Melissa, yes, it was wrong of me
- to fondle Mrs. Miller's breasts.
- 1954
- 01:42:04,640 --> 01:42:08,406
- You're right. I'm not gonna deny that it
- gave me a certain amount of pleasure.
- 1955
- 01:42:08,640 --> 01:42:13,726
- That said, your father and I are struggling
- with some serious intimacy issues.
- 1956
- 01:42:13,920 --> 01:42:15,046
- Okay, no, stop!
- 1957
- 01:42:15,240 --> 01:42:16,765
- I'm not as tight as I once was.
- 1958
- 01:42:16,960 --> 01:42:19,361
- - Look...
- - He just falls right out.
- 1959
- 01:42:19,560 --> 01:42:21,608
- It's like throwing a hot dog
- down a hallway.
- 1960
- 01:42:21,800 --> 01:42:23,962
- Ew! What are you talking about?
- 1961
- 01:42:24,160 --> 01:42:28,484
- I saw Kenny making out with his sister
- and mother while their dad watched.
- 1962
- 01:42:29,840 --> 01:42:31,410
- What? Oh, my...!
- 1963
- 01:42:31,600 --> 01:42:34,729
- - It wasn't quite like that.
- - That's not exactly what happened.
- 1964
- 01:42:34,960 --> 01:42:37,850
- Rose isn't my mom, she's not
- my sister. We're not a real family.
- 1965
- 01:42:38,080 --> 01:42:40,208
- ROSE: That's enough, son!
- What are you saying?
- 1966
- 01:42:40,400 --> 01:42:43,449
- He's been drinking. It's hard
- to understand. He's being ridiculous.
- 1967
- 01:42:43,640 --> 01:42:46,325
- David hired us to help him smuggle drugs
- across the border.
- 1968
- 01:42:46,520 --> 01:42:48,010
- You're drug dealers?
- 1969
- 01:42:48,400 --> 01:42:51,370
- No! No, we're drug smugglers.
- There's a difference.
- 1970
- 01:42:51,600 --> 01:42:53,170
- There's not a difference.
- 1971
- 01:42:53,360 --> 01:42:56,125
- Okay, Edie, we can explain, all right?
- 1972
- 01:42:56,320 --> 01:42:58,687
- ROSE: This is a small misunderstanding.
- It really is.
- 1973
- 01:42:58,880 --> 01:43:01,486
- When he says "smuggle," he doesn't
- know what he's saying.
- 1974
- 01:43:01,680 --> 01:43:03,921
- - It's not drugs.
- - He doesn't know what drugs are.
- 1975
- 01:43:04,120 --> 01:43:06,088
- Seriously. It's just a little tequila.
- 1976
- 01:43:07,480 --> 01:43:08,641
- What?
- 1977
- 01:43:08,840 --> 01:43:09,887
- Oh, my God!
- 1978
- 01:43:10,120 --> 01:43:13,806
- - Hey. Ah, thank God you're alive.
- ROSE: He's got a gun!
- 1979
- 01:43:14,040 --> 01:43:16,202
- Listen! Hey, hey, hey.
- No, no! Wait, wait, wait!
- 1980
- 01:43:18,560 --> 01:43:20,528
- (DON GRUNTS)
- 1981
- 01:43:21,960 --> 01:43:23,291
- This is gonna be fun!
- 1982
- 01:43:24,520 --> 01:43:26,727
- (GRUNTING)
- 1983
- 01:43:34,120 --> 01:43:35,406
- (PANTING)
- 1984
- 01:43:35,640 --> 01:43:37,210
- I still got it.
- 1985
- 01:43:37,400 --> 01:43:39,084
- Don's a badass.
- 1986
- 01:43:39,800 --> 01:43:42,007
- Oh, Don.
- 1987
- 01:43:43,880 --> 01:43:45,644
- Melissa, go find a police officer.
- 1988
- 01:43:47,240 --> 01:43:48,810
- Okay, Don. Don, listen to me.
- 1989
- 01:43:49,000 --> 01:43:51,401
- No. Drug smuggling, David?
- 1990
- 01:43:51,600 --> 01:43:53,568
- And to think of the moment we shared.
- 1991
- 01:43:53,760 --> 01:43:55,205
- No, Don, there's another guy.
- 1992
- 01:43:55,720 --> 01:43:57,484
- I don't want to hear about other men!
- 1993
- 01:43:58,120 --> 01:44:01,522
- What? No! No, no! No! There's
- another guy trying to kill us!
- 1994
- 01:44:01,720 --> 01:44:03,131
- What? Who?
- 1995
- 01:44:03,320 --> 01:44:04,481
- Pablo Chacon.
- 1996
- 01:44:05,120 --> 01:44:06,167
- Pablo Chacon.
- 1997
- 01:44:06,360 --> 01:44:07,486
- Buenas noches, Millers.
- 1998
- 01:44:07,680 --> 01:44:09,364
- What is he saying?
- What does that mean?
- 1999
- 01:44:09,560 --> 01:44:11,289
- It's a familiar Mexican greeting.
- 2000
- 01:44:11,480 --> 01:44:14,643
- You in the short jeans
- and the funny mustache, give me the gun.
- 2001
- 01:44:15,920 --> 01:44:17,126
- Melissa.
- 2002
- 01:44:19,920 --> 01:44:21,081
- And the mug.
- 2003
- 01:44:24,080 --> 01:44:25,320
- Please don't hurt her.
- 2004
- 01:44:26,160 --> 01:44:29,050
- - Take her.
- - Are you okay? It's okay.
- 2005
- 01:44:32,720 --> 01:44:33,926
- Now the keys, please.
- 2006
- 01:44:34,480 --> 01:44:35,606
- Here. Here, here, here.
- 2007
- 01:44:35,920 --> 01:44:39,163
- Okay, great. You have your drugs,
- so you don't have to kill us.
- 2008
- 01:44:39,360 --> 01:44:41,124
- Oh, I don't have to kill you, huh?
- 2009
- 01:44:41,360 --> 01:44:42,407
- You take my drugs.
- 2010
- 01:44:42,600 --> 01:44:45,570
- You make me cross the border into
- this fucked-up country.
- 2011
- 01:44:45,760 --> 01:44:47,922
- You try to burn my face with steam!
- 2012
- 01:44:48,120 --> 01:44:50,407
- - I'm sorry.
- - You destroy my car!
- 2013
- 01:44:52,240 --> 01:44:56,006
- And I don't like what you do to my man
- every time we meet.
- 2014
- 01:44:58,320 --> 01:45:00,402
- You are the worst family I've ever met.
- 2015
- 01:45:02,080 --> 01:45:04,242
- But, you're right, I
- don't have to kill you.
- 2016
- 01:45:06,800 --> 01:45:09,167
- I want to kill you. All of you.
- 2017
- 01:45:09,560 --> 01:45:11,403
- Stop. Stop.
- 2018
- 01:45:13,040 --> 01:45:15,930
- Don't do this. Don't kill these people.
- 2019
- 01:45:17,000 --> 01:45:20,607
- This is all my fault. I'm the one that
- did this. I'm the drug dealer here.
- 2020
- 01:45:20,800 --> 01:45:22,165
- This is an innocent family...
- 2021
- 01:45:22,360 --> 01:45:24,601
- ...in the wrong place
- at the wrong time. Okay?
- 2022
- 01:45:25,920 --> 01:45:27,206
- And this kid?
- 2023
- 01:45:27,520 --> 01:45:30,649
- This kid's got the biggest fucking heart
- I've ever seen in my life.
- 2024
- 01:45:31,480 --> 01:45:33,130
- And I'm lucky to call him a friend.
- 2025
- 01:45:33,440 --> 01:45:37,286
- Man, an hour ago, I would have killed
- this girl for you.
- 2026
- 01:45:37,480 --> 01:45:40,609
- But she's tough as hell.
- And a lot smarter than me.
- 2027
- 01:45:41,880 --> 01:45:43,166
- And this one.
- 2028
- 01:45:44,760 --> 01:45:47,491
- You. Sarah.
- 2029
- 01:45:48,520 --> 01:45:50,727
- You're the strongest woman
- I've ever met.
- 2030
- 01:45:50,920 --> 01:45:52,684
- And you'd make a great mom.
- 2031
- 01:45:55,320 --> 01:45:56,845
- I love all of them.
- 2032
- 01:45:58,920 --> 01:46:00,160
- Don't kill them.
- 2033
- 01:46:00,720 --> 01:46:01,926
- Please.
- 2034
- 01:46:03,120 --> 01:46:04,451
- Just kill me.
- 2035
- 01:46:05,360 --> 01:46:07,806
- - Tell you what, I'll make a deal, okay?
- - Okay.
- 2036
- 01:46:08,040 --> 01:46:10,407
- I kill you first so you don't
- watch your family die.
- 2037
- 01:46:10,600 --> 01:46:12,443
- (FIREWORKS POPPING)
- 2038
- 01:46:14,240 --> 01:46:16,447
- (ALL SHOUTING)
- 2039
- 01:46:18,960 --> 01:46:20,644
- (PABLO GROANS)
- 2040
- 01:46:21,480 --> 01:46:23,005
- KENNY: David.
- 2041
- 01:46:31,720 --> 01:46:33,563
- MELISSA: Kenny! That was amazing!
- 2042
- 01:46:40,360 --> 01:46:42,089
- I'd like to think I taught him that.
- 2043
- 01:46:42,720 --> 01:46:45,326
- MELISSA: Mm.
- - I know I taught him that.
- 2044
- 01:46:47,120 --> 01:46:49,088
- Put that tongue back in your mouth,
- young man.
- 2045
- 01:46:50,880 --> 01:46:52,120
- Oh.
- 2046
- 01:46:52,320 --> 01:46:54,163
- Wow.
- 2047
- 01:46:54,360 --> 01:46:56,886
- - You kiss a lot better than my sister.
- - Hey!
- 2048
- 01:46:59,040 --> 01:47:00,326
- - One, two, three.
- - Mm-hm.
- 2049
- 01:47:09,720 --> 01:47:13,691
- Well, Mr. Chacon, on behalf
- of the United States of America...
- 2050
- 01:47:13,880 --> 01:47:15,928
- ...I'd like to welcome you to our country.
- 2051
- 01:47:16,120 --> 01:47:17,531
- Grab a seat.
- 2052
- 01:47:18,560 --> 01:47:20,927
- Sorry you won't get to experience
- the freedom part.
- 2053
- 01:47:21,320 --> 01:47:23,368
- Don, you're my hero.
- 2054
- 01:47:23,760 --> 01:47:26,331
- (BOTH MOANING)
- 2055
- 01:47:27,320 --> 01:47:29,163
- I want you to use those zip ties tonight.
- 2056
- 01:47:29,360 --> 01:47:31,169
- (DON GIGGLES)
- 2057
- 01:47:43,120 --> 01:47:44,167
- Here.
- 2058
- 01:47:44,960 --> 01:47:46,246
- Thank you, David.
- 2059
- 01:47:48,880 --> 01:47:51,167
- - We're gonna go.
- - Not so fast.
- 2060
- 01:47:51,400 --> 01:47:52,606
- EDIE: Oh, no, Don.
- MELISSA: Dad, please.
- 2061
- 01:47:52,800 --> 01:47:54,245
- Girls, hush.
- 2062
- 01:47:57,040 --> 01:47:58,929
- I believe that you are good people.
- 2063
- 01:47:59,120 --> 01:48:01,282
- But you broke the law. All of you.
- 2064
- 01:48:01,560 --> 01:48:05,007
- And worse than that, you put my wife
- and daughter's lives in danger.
- 2065
- 01:48:05,560 --> 01:48:08,404
- - Sorry.
- - Gonna have to place you under arrest.
- 2066
- 01:48:08,600 --> 01:48:09,840
- EDIE: Don, why?
- MELISSA: No, Dad, don't.
- 2067
- 01:48:10,080 --> 01:48:11,525
- DON: And I'm gonna do just that...
- 2068
- 01:48:12,480 --> 01:48:14,369
- ...right after I turn around...
- 2069
- 01:48:15,280 --> 01:48:16,566
- ...and hug my family.
- 2070
- 01:48:29,160 --> 01:48:30,685
- David, come on.
- 2071
- 01:48:38,480 --> 01:48:39,686
- BRAD: It's all here!
- 2072
- 01:48:40,080 --> 01:48:42,560
- I am blown away, David. Great job.
- 2073
- 01:48:43,000 --> 01:48:45,162
- But it's late.
- 2074
- 01:48:45,600 --> 01:48:48,524
- Deadline was last night, so,
- sorry, buddy, no deal.
- 2075
- 01:48:49,480 --> 01:48:52,484
- Brad, I almost got killed
- over this shit. Twice.
- 2076
- 01:48:52,680 --> 01:48:56,480
- I'm not gonna be an asshole about this.
- I got two tons of premium weed.
- 2077
- 01:48:56,840 --> 01:49:00,526
- Yes! And you got Chacon
- pinched in the process...
- 2078
- 01:49:00,760 --> 01:49:03,843
- - ...which is a huge win for team Brad.
- - Mm-hm.
- 2079
- 01:49:04,040 --> 01:49:07,169
- So how about we shake hands
- and call it even.
- 2080
- 01:49:07,360 --> 01:49:08,646
- (SCOFFS)
- 2081
- 01:49:09,920 --> 01:49:13,811
- - You were never gonna pay me, were you?
- - Oh! Bingo. Heh-heh.
- 2082
- 01:49:15,120 --> 01:49:17,361
- Was that a dick move?
- I can't even tell anymore.
- 2083
- 01:49:18,440 --> 01:49:20,442
- (ALL SHOUTING)
- 2084
- 01:49:20,640 --> 01:49:22,404
- AGENT 1: Move!
- AGENT 2: Go! Go! Go!
- 2085
- 01:49:23,240 --> 01:49:24,287
- DEA!
- 2086
- 01:49:25,200 --> 01:49:27,441
- - Down, down, down!
- AGENT 3: - Get on the ground! Freeze!
- 2087
- 01:49:29,560 --> 01:49:31,050
- Clear!
- 2088
- 01:49:33,320 --> 01:49:34,481
- You double-crossed me.
- 2089
- 01:49:34,800 --> 01:49:36,370
- Kind of a dick move, right?
- 2090
- 01:49:37,440 --> 01:49:39,010
- BRAD: You got nothing on me!
- 2091
- 01:49:39,280 --> 01:49:40,691
- Nothing at all.
- 2092
- 01:49:41,680 --> 01:49:44,251
- Oh, shit! Look at this guy.
- 2093
- 01:49:44,440 --> 01:49:46,329
- Who let in 50 Cent?
- 2094
- 01:49:47,920 --> 01:49:50,082
- - Nice work, David.
- - Thank you, Don.
- 2095
- 01:49:50,280 --> 01:49:52,328
- Now, I know you don't get your money...
- 2096
- 01:49:52,560 --> 01:49:55,689
- ...but doing the right thing
- had to feel a whole lot better.
- 2097
- 01:49:56,080 --> 01:49:57,491
- No.
- 2098
- 01:49:58,080 --> 01:49:59,445
- All right, maybe a little bit.
- 2099
- 01:49:59,640 --> 01:50:04,089
- As promised, in exchange for your
- testimony against Chacon and Gurdlinger...
- 2100
- 01:50:04,320 --> 01:50:07,563
- ...we have to keep you in witness
- protection for three to six months.
- 2101
- 01:50:07,760 --> 01:50:10,206
- - Just me?
- - Just you.
- 2102
- 01:50:12,760 --> 01:50:16,651
- Oh. And any other witnesses to the crime.
- 2103
- 01:50:21,120 --> 01:50:23,043
- (BICYCLE BELL RINGS)
- 2104
- 01:50:27,480 --> 01:50:29,244
- DAVID: (ON COMPUTER) There you are.
- ROSE: I don't care.
- 2105
- 01:50:29,440 --> 01:50:31,560
- - Look at this hot nerd.
- DAVID: - Rub some dirt on it.
- 2106
- 01:50:31,680 --> 01:50:33,170
- - What are you doing?
- - Look at this.
- 2107
- 01:50:33,360 --> 01:50:35,169
- (CHATTERING OVER COMPUTER)
- 2108
- 01:50:35,360 --> 01:50:39,206
- You gotta tell Casey to stop posting this stuff.
- It's already got a million hits...
- 2109
- 01:50:39,560 --> 01:50:40,766
- ...and growing.
- 2110
- 01:50:40,960 --> 01:50:43,930
- Okay, okay, I'll tell her after lunch.
- Oof, you know what else?
- 2111
- 01:50:44,120 --> 01:50:45,690
- I can see down your tank top.
- 2112
- 01:50:52,440 --> 01:50:53,521
- DAN: Hey there.
- - Hey.
- 2113
- 01:50:53,720 --> 01:50:56,803
- - Wanted to introduce ourselves. I'm Dan.
- - Hey, Dan.
- 2114
- 01:50:57,040 --> 01:50:58,883
- My wife, Kathy. We just moved in.
- 2115
- 01:50:59,320 --> 01:51:00,685
- DAVID: Hello.
- - We're the Johnsons.
- 2116
- 01:51:00,920 --> 01:51:03,002
- Oh, great. Welcome to the neighborhood.
- 2117
- 01:51:03,440 --> 01:51:04,965
- Hey, guys. Come here.
- 2118
- 01:51:05,160 --> 01:51:06,286
- Come meet our neighbors.
- 2119
- 01:51:06,480 --> 01:51:07,527
- I'm David.
- 2120
- 01:51:07,920 --> 01:51:09,888
- And this is my family right here.
- 2121
- 01:51:10,040 --> 01:51:11,280
- This is my son, Kenny.
- 2122
- 01:51:11,440 --> 01:51:12,646
- My daughter, Casey.
- 2123
- 01:51:12,800 --> 01:51:15,326
- - And this is my wife, Sarah.
- - Nice to meet you.
- 2124
- 01:51:15,520 --> 01:51:18,046
- - We're the Millers.
- DAN: - Ah. Pleasure.
- 2125
- 01:51:18,200 --> 01:51:20,567
- Thanks for saying hi.
- All right, take care now.
- 2126
- 01:51:20,720 --> 01:51:22,609
- KATHY: - See you soon. Bye.
- - Bye.
- 2127
- 01:51:22,920 --> 01:51:25,161
- ROSE: I don't like them.
- DAVID: I don't like them either.
- 2128
- 01:51:25,320 --> 01:51:27,721
- Why introduce yourself?
- I mean, who the fuck are you?
- 2129
- 01:51:27,880 --> 01:51:30,884
- ROSE: I can't believe this.
- We're stuck in the suburbs.
- 2130
- 01:51:31,040 --> 01:51:35,045
- DAVID: Now, this sucks. I can't wait for the
- trial to be over. Gotta get outta here.
- 2131
- 01:51:40,400 --> 01:51:41,447
- Stick to the big A.
- 2132
- 01:51:41,600 --> 01:51:43,170
- - Anal.
- - Abstinence, you meant.
- 2133
- 01:51:43,320 --> 01:51:45,129
- - Neither makes a baby.
- - He confuses...
- 2134
- 01:51:45,280 --> 01:51:47,965
- Oscars! For all of you!
- 2135
- 01:51:48,120 --> 01:51:51,124
- That's very nice of you, but we're
- not that good of an actor, no.
- 2136
- 01:51:52,640 --> 01:51:53,880
- (CREW LAUGHING)
- 2137
- 01:51:54,600 --> 01:51:56,887
- - Those guys are picking on that girl.
- - Where?
- 2138
- 01:51:57,040 --> 01:51:58,804
- (KENNY LAUGHING)
- 2139
- 01:51:59,520 --> 01:52:01,568
- - I'll never forget these moments.
- - What?
- 2140
- 01:52:01,720 --> 01:52:04,200
- - And I hope you don't either.
- - Ha-ha-ha.
- 2141
- 01:52:04,640 --> 01:52:05,880
- MAN: And, action.
- 2142
- 01:52:08,040 --> 01:52:09,963
- It takes two men to open this
- mini-fridge.
- 2143
- 01:52:10,520 --> 01:52:12,568
- Aah!
- 2144
- 01:52:12,720 --> 01:52:16,611
- It's literally so hard!
- 2145
- 01:52:17,800 --> 01:52:20,160
- - Okay, you guys, seriously, you're mak...
- CREW: - Ha-ha-ha!
- 2146
- 01:52:20,440 --> 01:52:21,487
- MAN: Look, look, look.
- 2147
- 01:52:22,960 --> 01:52:24,769
- - Ha, ha!
- - Leave the girls alone.
- 2148
- 01:52:24,960 --> 01:52:28,089
- What are you gonna do, freckles?
- What are you gonna do, Don Knotts?
- 2149
- 01:52:28,240 --> 01:52:30,322
- What are you gonna do,
- guy with great posture?
- 2150
- 01:52:31,040 --> 01:52:32,451
- (GRUNTS)
- 2151
- 01:52:32,640 --> 01:52:34,802
- SCOTTIE: Ow! Broke my nose!
- 2152
- 01:52:35,160 --> 01:52:37,401
- I'm terrified of blood,
- you know what I'm saying?
- 2153
- 01:52:37,760 --> 01:52:40,684
- You just deviated my septum,
- you know what I'm saying?
- 2154
- 01:52:40,840 --> 01:52:44,287
- Uh, I want a Band-Aid.
- 2155
- 01:52:45,680 --> 01:52:47,762
- ROSE: - Closed?
- - They're closed. Till morning.
- 2156
- 01:52:47,920 --> 01:52:50,400
- Oklahoma.
- Oh, poop.
- 2157
- 01:52:50,560 --> 01:52:52,642
- Cheese and rice.
- Ants on a log.
- 2158
- 01:52:52,800 --> 01:52:55,121
- Poop on a Popsicle.
- Oh, cock marbles.
- 2159
- 01:52:55,280 --> 01:52:58,170
- - Oh, fuck.
- ROSE: - Ha-ha-ha.
- 2160
- 01:52:58,800 --> 01:53:00,325
- (GRUNTING)
- 2161
- 01:53:08,000 --> 01:53:09,650
- (BOTH GIGGLING)
- 2162
- 01:53:09,840 --> 01:53:11,649
- (CREW LAUGHING)
- 2163
- 01:53:12,800 --> 01:53:15,451
- It just stopped at a certain point...
- 2164
- 01:53:15,640 --> 01:53:18,041
- ...and you just couldn't
- insert it any more.
- 2165
- 01:53:18,200 --> 01:53:21,363
- Well, I just looked like I had,
- like, a Stormtrooper dick.
- 2166
- 01:53:21,560 --> 01:53:24,245
- (ALL LAUGHING)
- 2167
- 01:53:24,800 --> 01:53:27,849
- So I'm just gonna... There we go.
- There they are.
- 2168
- 01:53:28,000 --> 01:53:29,081
- This is crazy.
- 2169
- 01:53:29,280 --> 01:53:32,363
- Those are just gorgeous, gorgeous,
- gorgeous breasts.
- 2170
- 01:53:33,680 --> 01:53:34,727
- (SNORTS)
- 2171
- 01:53:34,880 --> 01:53:36,564
- MAN 1: Cut! All right. Cut.
- 2172
- 01:53:37,200 --> 01:53:38,929
- MAN 2: - And, action.
- - Whoo!
- 2173
- 01:53:39,120 --> 01:53:42,010
- - How about a little victory music, shall we?
- - Yes, please.
- 2174
- 01:53:42,680 --> 01:53:45,001
- (THE REMBRANDTS' "I'LL BE THERE
- FOR YOU" PLAYING ON RADIO)
- 2175
- 01:53:45,160 --> 01:53:46,810
- - I love this song!
- - This is awesome!
- 2176
- 01:53:47,120 --> 01:53:48,406
- (DAVID WHOOPS)
- 2177
- 01:53:50,360 --> 01:53:55,127
- (SINGING) You're job's a joke, you're broke
- Your love life's D.O.A.
- 2178
- 01:53:55,280 --> 01:53:58,284
- I'll be there for you
- 2179
- 01:53:58,440 --> 01:53:59,965
- When the rain starts to fall
- 2180
- 01:54:00,120 --> 01:54:03,283
- I'll be there for you
- 2181
- 01:54:03,480 --> 01:54:06,006
- 'Cause you're there for me too
- 2182
- 01:54:06,160 --> 01:54:08,527
- That was really good.
- 2183
- 01:54:08,680 --> 01:54:10,250
- (ALL LAUGHING)
- 2184
- 01:54:10,440 --> 01:54:12,681
- That's very funny.
- 2185
- 01:58:23,160 --> 01:58:25,208
- ONE-EYE: Adiós, Millers.
- 2186
- 01:58:39,080 --> 01:58:45,882
- Download Only Hindi Audio of this movie from
- akumenang.com
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