jayclark

Jay Clark Quotes

"Practice safe interfacing."

"It's a cluster fuck in here."

"I'm the guy who always changed the root passwood."

"Trust me, I work for the government."

"Nick... Bryan... is there a Nick in here?"

"Instead of allowing an exception through his firewall, he just dropped his pants."

"Is there porn on the internet?"

"You learned about that in what, fifth grade, right? Spawning?"

"We can't talk about religion, it's a public school. No wait- let's talk about God - Yaweh."

"Hey guys, we haven't met for a while. Has anyone tried heroin yet?"

"Falling on the Floor 4"

"Damn that turkey."

"I know 64 ways to kill a process."

"It's an art day."

"Fresh Prince - it never goes away, it's funny forever."

"We've gotta bring out the big guns... we need to Gunzip it."

"Did you go to Spencers' with Jeremy, B-lak-eh?"

"I met a girl this weekend that couldn't pronounce 'ng'. She kept saying 'Lets han out.' What? 'You know, han out.'"

"Linux is so stable that you never need to back it up."

"Rackmounted servers look sturdy but if you put a 300 pound dumbass on it it'll break."

"Optical media disappears after time. They're also really fun to microwave."

"I'm gonna go next door and the DVD rack will be empty and the microwave will be on fire."

"Everyone knows what the rule of thumb is, right? You can only beat your wife with a stick no wider than the width of your thumb."

"-f means have fun while compressing the archive."

"What is -r? Really really do it?"

"That's what a tarball is - everythings just crushed together... like the death star... thing."

"Why do donuts have holes in the center? So cops can have 10 and still drive."

"So over the weekend our dog got into the oreo snack bags. Wrappers everywhere. He's either going to die happy or shit everywhere."

"Oh good, it worked. Next I was going to waterboard everybody."

"So... compress. Nothing too special about it, it's just putting 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag."

"Is Bailey here? How do you load paper when it already has paper?"

"Shaving Ryan's Privates? What kind of movies do you watch?"

"It'll turn your life around 360 degrees!"

"Doesn't Dr. Pepper have olive oil in it or something?"

"Don't make me come back there, Wakowski!"

> What'd you have for breakfast this morning?
	"Heroin."

"Back it up, back it in."

> Kyle: Cows have udders.
	"And bulls only have one."

> Christina: We need a switch U and F.
	"I'm going to do FU because it's more fun. We're putting the FU back in FUN."

"It's like just in case I want to cut myself I have some porcelain to help me out."

> Aaron: Well, according to linuxquestions.org...
	"You should go into politics qualifying your answers like that - 'According to a guy I know who lives in Chicago...'"

"I like wget, whoever wrote wget should get your money."

"I didn't read the readme file, and after a while I started talking to Jesus and he told me to read it."

"Always read the read me file to make sure that Tobi isn't a funny guy."

> Me: You need to get a C compiler.
	[root@localhost mrtg-2.17.4]# get a c compuler.

"Well, I hope you're happy Aaron, we've come full circle."

"This is why guns are banned on the premesis."

"FRESH PRINCE - I'll be here all week."

"I wanted you to configure this manually so you'd have to feel the suffrage - that's right - no right to vote for you."