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- from /hhg/ Helluva Hotel Gunt #1017, #1018
- part 1: https://pastebin.com/7JVRjH0q
- part 2: https://pastebin.com/yZuW79vA
- part 3: https://pastebin.com/0mRmkQyk
- part 4: https://pastebin.com/UaC8xZtj
- part 5: https://pastebin.com/GcDn60pr
- https://desuarchive.org/trash/thread/46501822/#46541585
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- save: https://hardbin.com/ipfs/QmY6GGsHEpsyp3KxbnNbeRpsu8eNx6EFn7GgxKHL8Bbt24/#833LvaErWbEDHSoVDmd2DB6qXGF23JgsC5yqoAxpPcSh
- (carry over from this new story chapter: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34921879/chapters/95045713)
- Good story and good work thus far.
- In terms of criticism I do feel the grammar and sentence structure of this chapter is notably worse than prior ones
- I think most of the obvious ones could be fixed by just running the chapter through a spelling and grammar check program, even google docs would do it.
- >A pair of headlights sudden blinds you
- >Like the caring individual that you are you
- >Moxxie never cared to much about Loona
- etc, etc, etc
- Grammer aside, I've enjoyed the chapter. I quite like how Anon-Stolas casually comforts and reassures a random would be murderer imp simply because Anon-Stolas does not understand how powerful he is and underestimates the imps.
- -
- Yeah that’s my fault do to me kinda rushing it since I haven’t updated it in like 4 months. There’s definitely more work I should have done on spell checking. Thanks for the tip with the program I’ll use it to check each paragraph from now on. Next chapter hopefully won’t take as long since I’ve gotten back in the writing groove.
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