to-thebone

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?1
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[man on PA]
Dr. Branson, please call 5914.

2
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Dr. Branson, please call 5914.

3
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[metal screeching]

4
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[phone ringing]

5
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[girl] It's like, every time you turn
on the TV or look at a magazine,

6
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it's, "Oh, my God,
this cake is so delicious."

7
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And, like, your reward or something.

8
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And then, you turn the page,
and there's some sad, fat "before" girl,

9
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and she's all, "I hate myself."

10
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And then, the thin "after" girl goes,

11
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"I did this diet, and now I'm happy,
and everyone loves me."

12
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What about the chocolate cake?

13
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It's like they're trying
to drive us crazy.

14
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[girl sighs] "Society's to blame.

15
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The world is so unfair. I have to die."

16
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:31,341
There's no point in blaming everybody.

17
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Live with it.

18
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:36,972
Ellen, do you think there's a way
you can express that

19
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:39,016
without discounting Penny's feelings?

20
00:01:41,310 --> 00:01:43,395
- [chuckles]
- ["False Jeopardy" playing]

21
00:01:48,984 --> 00:01:50,861
? It's not the end ?

22
00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:52,738
- ? It's not the end ?
- [scoffs]

23
00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:56,575
? It's false jeopardy ?

24
00:01:56,658 --> 00:02:00,454
[song continues]

25
00:02:00,537 --> 00:02:03,290
? I won't be let down ?

26
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:08,837
? It's not the end, it's not the end ?

27
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Bitch.

28
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:17,304
Told you you'd lose.
You owe me a carton of Camels.

29
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[chuckles]

30
00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:24,061
? Just try and be sure ?

31
00:02:25,228 --> 00:02:29,066
? It's not the end, it's not the end ?

32
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:32,986
? It's false jeopardy ?

33
00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:36,865
[song continues]

34
00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:40,535
? I won't be let down ?

35
00:02:40,619 --> 00:02:44,665
? It's not the end, it's not the end ?

36
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:48,251
? It's not the end
It's not the end ?

37
00:02:53,590 --> 00:02:54,591
[doorbell rings]

38
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:03,392
Oh, my God. Look at you.
Your parents are gonna kill you.

39
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:08,063
No more trips to TJ, Rosa.
I think they put cement in your lips.

40
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:11,733
Your mom said,
"Take the room in the garage."

41
00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:14,152
There's a room in the garage now?

42
00:03:14,236 --> 00:03:17,823
Every time I come home, you have
a new face and there's more house.

43
00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:21,326
- It was gonna be your mother's office.
- She's not my mother.

44
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:25,122
[Ellen grunting, panting]

45
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:30,085
[grunting continues]

46
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,550
- [knocking on door]
- [Rosa] Dinner is half an hour!

47
00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:39,761
- Your father and mother are eating out.
- Okay.

48
00:03:42,681 --> 00:03:45,809
- [Ellen] Are you on that dating app again?
- [girl] No. Come on, what?

49
00:03:45,892 --> 00:03:49,438
- You know what I'm doing. Come on.
- Oh.

50
00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:51,732
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

51
00:03:51,815 --> 00:03:54,860
- All right, go. Get ready.
- [exhales]

52
00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:57,195
- All right, ready?
- Mm-hmm.

53
00:03:57,279 --> 00:03:59,948
280 for the pork,
350 for the buttered noodles,

54
00:04:00,031 --> 00:04:03,160
125 for the buttered beans,
150 for the roll, and 50...

55
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:06,621
No, 75 for butter.

56
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:12,043
- You got it. All of it. Dang.
- [sighs] Yes.

57
00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:14,379
Oh, my God.
It's like you have calorie Asperger's.

58
00:04:14,463 --> 00:04:16,965
- I mean, hold the applause.
- You're a pro.

59
00:04:17,048 --> 00:04:20,552
Okay, wait. Now, so how many...
how many calories you think boogers have?

60
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,095
Ay, don't say that.

61
00:04:22,179 --> 00:04:24,264
What? She probably knows.
You know, right?

62
00:04:28,518 --> 00:04:32,731
- Not just the beans, the meat.
- I'd say snot's pretty low.

63
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:35,859
Maybe, like, five to ten,
depending on the size of the pickin's.

64
00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:36,943
- The meat.
- Mm-hmm.

65
00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:39,821
- And you are both being disgusting.
- [snickers]

66
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:42,824
"The meat."

67
00:04:42,908 --> 00:04:44,951
[laughing]

68
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:48,455
You know, you used to have a jar
that you kept all your boogers in?

69
00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:49,978
- No, I didn't.
- You absolutely did.

70
00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:51,124
- You probably did.
- Hello!

71
00:04:51,208 --> 00:04:55,212
- Stop. No, I didn't.
- Sorry we couldn't pick you up.

72
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:56,671
[sighs] Work.

73
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:02,719
[chuckles] Mmm. Did you get settled in?

74
00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:07,474
[woman] So, Jack is very upset with you.
He's very worried.

75
00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:09,976
Why doesn't Jack tell me himself?

76
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:12,729
Your father would rather
you and I have this talk, okay?

77
00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:15,941
Right.

78
00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:18,652
It's not that he doesn't care.
He cares too much.

79
00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:21,321
You don't know.

80
00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:27,452
[sighs] The doctor said you were defiant
and a bad influence on the other girls.

81
00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:30,789
Is this what it's gonna be now?
Are you proud of yourself?

82
00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:32,165
I'm maintaining.

83
00:05:36,086 --> 00:05:38,004
I have to weigh you.

84
00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:39,565
The agreement was you could live here

85
00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:42,133
as long as you kept up
your end of the bargain.

86
00:05:42,217 --> 00:05:45,029
- You wanna go back to your mother's?
- Mom moved to Phoenix with Olive.

87
00:05:45,053 --> 00:05:46,414
Yeah, that's what I mean. Phoenix.

88
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:49,182
We can put you on the bus,
first thing tomorrow.

89
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:08,076
[sighs] Jesus.

90
00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:11,997
- I had that cold, and I...
- I don't wanna hear it. Get on.

91
00:06:16,001 --> 00:06:20,171
- It's not at zero.
- Stop. Stop it. Get on.

92
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:26,094
[sighs] God.

93
00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,220
Okay.

94
00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:30,682
Turn towards me.

95
00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:36,645
[camera clicks]

96
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:41,735
Do you see that?
Do you see what you look like?

97
00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:44,028
Yeah.

98
00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,699
Do you think that's beautiful?

99
00:06:49,034 --> 00:06:50,076
No.

100
00:06:51,369 --> 00:06:53,622
So, what are you gonna do about it?

101
00:06:57,375 --> 00:07:01,296
Jesus Christ. We can't do this again.
I can't do this again.

102
00:07:06,718 --> 00:07:07,802
[kicks scale]

103
00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:17,020
- [man speaking indistinctly]
- [door squeaking]

104
00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:23,777
[faint arguing]

105
00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:32,452
[knocking]

106
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:35,330
[arguing continues]

107
00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:40,585
You have a car now, right?

108
00:07:41,753 --> 00:07:42,753
Yeah.

109
00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:46,091
[whispers] What?

110
00:07:46,174 --> 00:07:48,009
[crickets chirping]

111
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:51,221
You're using me to burn off
half a pack of lifesavers or some shit.

112
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:55,308
- The view is best at the top.
- Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

113
00:07:56,726 --> 00:08:01,106
Hey, look. Don't tell anyone, okay?

114
00:08:01,189 --> 00:08:02,232
[laughs]

115
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:04,567
- A butterfly tattoo?
- Yeah.

116
00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:05,944
Were you drunk?

117
00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:11,241
- No. Butterflies are classic.
- They're retarded.

118
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:15,620
Okay, I'm sorry I didn't have
your artistic eye to advise me,

119
00:08:15,704 --> 00:08:17,747
so I got a retarded butterfly.

120
00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:20,166
I mean, it's pretty.

121
00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:28,008
Dad and Susan are gonna kick me out,
or drag me to that treatment.

122
00:08:29,551 --> 00:08:31,761
- Okay, so eat.
- I eat.

123
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,307
You know
that I love you like a full sister,

124
00:08:36,391 --> 00:08:39,561
but you look like absolute crap.

125
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,521
And every time I ask you why you do this,

126
00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:45,900
I always get
some stupid non-answer from you.

127
00:08:45,984 --> 00:08:48,069
At least, I'm a cheap date.

128
00:08:48,153 --> 00:08:50,363
That stuff goes further
on an empty stomach.

129
00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:53,658
[sighs]

130
00:08:55,243 --> 00:08:57,829
I've got it under control.

131
00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:01,416
Nothing bad's gonna happen.

132
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,337
How many people
do you think are down there?

133
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,300
Like, two million?

134
00:09:14,345 --> 00:09:18,600
I bet a bunch of them who are about to die
just said the exact same thing.

135
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:31,404
- That's not breakfast.
- Neither is coffee. Dad home?

136
00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,324
He had an early meeting.

137
00:09:35,950 --> 00:09:36,993
Hey.

138
00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:44,209
You have a choice.

139
00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:47,045
There's one last person
that we want you to see, a specialist.

140
00:09:47,128 --> 00:09:50,006
- It wasn't easy getting an appointment...
- I think I will call my mom.

141
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:53,510
- I should at least try Phoenix.
- We spoke to your mother last night.

142
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:58,139
She says it's not a good time
for her to take this on.

143
00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:00,517
But she sends hugs.

144
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,478
[soft guitar music playing]

145
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:36,760
[music stops]

146
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:42,392
Now, you know me, I enjoy people,
but your mother is selfish.

147
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:46,271
Do you think we wanted to stay
in the Valley? North Hollywood. [scoffs]

148
00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:52,819
But... with this and school for you
and Kelly, only thing we can afford.

149
00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:56,906
Not that I... love the Westside.
You can never find parking.

150
00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:03,163
[sighs] Well, at least on our side,
we have Pier 1, which I love.

151
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:06,166
Over there at the Grove,
all you have is Cost Plus World Market.

152
00:11:06,249 --> 00:11:08,001
I mean, all that is just junk.

153
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:10,170
You too? Was it hard
getting an appointment?

154
00:11:11,337 --> 00:11:13,590
We were on the waiting list
for six months.

155
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:16,885
[Susan] Six months?
Ooh, it wasn't that long for us.

156
00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:19,470
I guess word is out
about his success rate.

157
00:11:19,554 --> 00:11:22,348
So, I hear that his methods
are a little unconventional.

158
00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:27,395
They're quite radical. But we've tried
everything else. Renfrew, Maudsley.

159
00:11:27,478 --> 00:11:31,524
Maudsley? Ooh, you're brave.
Was that a nightmare?

160
00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:35,278
It took a long time getting used to it.

161
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:46,372
- Does that really work?
- No, I'm just thirsty.

162
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,083
[turns off faucet]

163
00:11:49,167 --> 00:11:54,422
How old are you, anyway? Your mom said
you had to drop out of college.

164
00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:58,009
Twenty. And she's not my mom.

165
00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:01,387
Twenty, wow.
And you're some kind of artist?

166
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:05,642
Your... Well, that lady said
you're kind of famous.

167
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:06,726
She's nuts.

168
00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:12,065
But you had, like, a crazy fan
or something.

169
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:20,782
Susan, my stepmom, has a reality problem.
You get one letter, you have a crazy fan.

170
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,493
Seriously? She made it sound like
you had a stalker or something.

171
00:12:23,576 --> 00:12:26,621
Yeah. Not even.

172
00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:28,623
She said she was taking
the anti-depressants,

173
00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,184
but she'd been flushing them
down the toilet.

174
00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:31,894
She was afraid
they would make her gain weight.

175
00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:37,674
And I know, she has a right to lash out.
Her mother Judy, she is a bipolar lesbian.

176
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:41,094
- That is not why...
- Judy has had several breakdowns,

177
00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:43,471
hospitalizations.

178
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:45,306
Poor Ellen had to call us one time

179
00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:48,226
because her mother was writing
her own bible on the walls.

180
00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:50,269
Judy came out when Ellen was 13.

181
00:12:50,353 --> 00:12:54,649
The child is going through puberty,
and overnight, she's got two moms?

182
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:58,695
Traumatic. It has got to have something
to do with the weight and...

183
00:12:58,778 --> 00:12:59,988
Sounds rough.

184
00:13:01,072 --> 00:13:05,451
But looking for one reason is
a losing battle. It's never that simple.

185
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:09,580
Absolutely. I say that to her father
all the time. He blames himself.

186
00:13:09,664 --> 00:13:14,043
Now, I think throwing Ellen
into the deep end, real life...

187
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:15,586
might do her some good.

188
00:13:15,670 --> 00:13:17,088
My family was on welfare.

189
00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:21,217
- We had nothing.
- Okay, thank you. I think I got it.

190
00:13:26,097 --> 00:13:30,268
- [man] You do a lot of sit-ups.
- [Ellen] Not that many.

191
00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:33,771
It wasn't a question. That's where
you get these bruises on your spine.

192
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:37,942
Your stepmom always talk that much?

193
00:13:40,361 --> 00:13:42,947
You know how sharks have
to keep swimming or they'll die?

194
00:13:44,073 --> 00:13:45,575
She's kinda like that with talking.

195
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,916
Take a deep breath.

196
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,626
- [inhales deeply]
- Let it out.

197
00:13:55,710 --> 00:13:57,003
[exhales]

198
00:13:58,212 --> 00:14:02,216
- Again.
- [breathes deeply]

199
00:14:02,300 --> 00:14:03,342
And one more.

200
00:14:03,426 --> 00:14:06,095
[breathes deeply]

201
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:11,267
When was the last time
you got your period?

202
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:14,186
God.

203
00:14:16,064 --> 00:14:17,148
Um...

204
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:21,235
It must have been... [mutters]

205
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:23,696
A long time ago.

206
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:29,494
I don't feel... that unhealthy, you know?

207
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:34,123
[chuckles] If I wanna be thin,
don't they say that that's better?

208
00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:36,626
I'll outlive the normies.

209
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:41,672
- You like this? The furry?
- What? No, I'm not...

210
00:14:41,756 --> 00:14:45,301
Lanugo. Your body's trying
to keep you warm by making more hair.

211
00:14:46,302 --> 00:14:47,553
But you know that, right?

212
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:53,101
I talk to kids like you all day,
every day.

213
00:14:53,184 --> 00:14:56,813
So, I know that you are,
as a rule, full of shit.

214
00:14:56,896 --> 00:15:01,192
You're not thin. You scare people.
And I'm guessing you like that.

215
00:15:01,275 --> 00:15:04,237
But the way that you're going,
one day, you won't wake up.

216
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:07,573
And I'm not going to treat you
if you aren't interested in living.

217
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:10,993
Good speech.

218
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:14,872
If I'm going to help you,
you have to agree to a few things.

219
00:15:16,374 --> 00:15:19,669
- What?
- No talk about food.

220
00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:23,381
I'm not interested.
It's boring and not very helpful.

221
00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:25,425
And your parents can't talk
about it either.

222
00:15:25,508 --> 00:15:28,970
- You're on your own, understand?
- Yes.

223
00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:32,056
You'll agree to a minimum
of six weeks in-patient.

224
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:33,891
I don't need more in-patient.

225
00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:38,729
Then find another doctor.

226
00:15:43,192 --> 00:15:45,379
- [Susan] Well?
- [Ellen] He wants to admit me on Monday.

227
00:15:45,403 --> 00:15:48,281
He said that? He said he'll admit you?

228
00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:52,994
This is great! What exactly did he say?

229
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:57,206
Is Dad coming?

230
00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:01,794
Uh, you know, we didn't have much time
to talk, but he's on his way home.

231
00:16:01,878 --> 00:16:02,879
Dad's coming?

232
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,380
Mm...

233
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:07,717
- He's on his way, but he said not to wait.
- So, he's not coming.

234
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:13,973
Hey, what happened to that sweet girl
that I met at Transitions?

235
00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:17,810
- The Mexican.
- Angel?

236
00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:20,730
- Mm-hmm.
- Her mom's from El Salvador.

237
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,315
You know what I mean.

238
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:25,818
You two seemed very close. And I just...

239
00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:29,405
I want you to know
that it's fine if you were.

240
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:33,826
[both laughing]

241
00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:36,162
- Thank you, Susan.
- Jesus, Mom.

242
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:39,457
Just because her mom is gay
does not mean that she's gay.

243
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:41,542
You know, you can get married now.

244
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:45,004
I'm not saying you are.
I'm just saying, you know, if you...

245
00:16:46,255 --> 00:16:47,798
if you have that kind of turmoil,

246
00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:50,968
then you might feel
like you don't deserve to eat.

247
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:52,261
Pussy, you mean.

248
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:55,473
[both laughing]

249
00:17:04,941 --> 00:17:08,736
Are you done? I've got a special dessert.

250
00:17:08,819 --> 00:17:11,864
Yup, all done. Thanks.

251
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:17,161
Well, I'm so sorry Dad couldn't be here
for your lesbian coming out party.

252
00:17:17,245 --> 00:17:20,373
It really sucks.
I mean, I believe it, but...

253
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:21,958
No, I'm... I'm fine.

254
00:17:24,877 --> 00:17:27,713
Will you try... this time?

255
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:32,969
I mean, maybe this doctor is really great.
Can you please just try this time?

256
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,095
[footsteps approaching]

257
00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:36,264
[Susan] Ta-da!

258
00:17:36,347 --> 00:17:37,515
[Susan chuckles]

259
00:17:40,268 --> 00:17:41,394
[Susan] Isn't it funny?

260
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:43,312
[chuckles]

261
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,522
It's a cake.

262
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:49,318
[man on radio] With the syrup
and the nuts, it was literally heaven.

263
00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,362
Life in these arctic temperatures
is measured

264
00:17:51,445 --> 00:17:53,489
by the briefest moments of light...

265
00:18:00,496 --> 00:18:04,750
- This is it? You're sure?
- Yeah, this is the address.

266
00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:08,462
Oh, hi.

267
00:18:09,547 --> 00:18:10,923
- Oh, that's okay.
- Please.

268
00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:14,051
- So I can get my points.
- Okay.

269
00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:20,016
- So, what's your name?
- Ellen.

270
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:26,939
Anna. Bulimia nervosa.
Although, more nervosa than bulimia now.

271
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:27,857
[chuckles]

272
00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,358
That's Kendra.

273
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:39,368
Here you go. Welcome to Threshold.
I'll, uh... I'll go get Lobo.

274
00:18:40,411 --> 00:18:42,622
Lobo!

275
00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:45,708
This is... very nice, homey.

276
00:18:47,209 --> 00:18:48,336
Hey.

277
00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:51,088
Uh, hi, are you Lobo?

278
00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:54,258
[British accent] Lucus. Like "mucus."

279
00:18:54,342 --> 00:18:56,218
[chuckles]

280
00:18:56,302 --> 00:18:58,554
But I prefer "Luke." Lobo is a dame.

281
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:01,724
- A dame?
- A broad, a skirt.

282
00:19:02,767 --> 00:19:05,645
Raymond Chandler is my muse
since I got here.

283
00:19:05,728 --> 00:19:07,980
To the hardscrabbled streets
of LA, that is.

284
00:19:08,064 --> 00:19:09,190
- Oh. [laughs]
- Wow.

285
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:14,236
- I'm from London, originally.
- London? How interesting.

286
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,697
Did you come all this way for Dr. Beckham?

287
00:19:16,781 --> 00:19:20,368
By way of Jersey. It's a sordid tale.

288
00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:24,288
- But he's the best, so...
- Well, Ellen's from Los Angeles.

289
00:19:24,372 --> 00:19:27,708
- How interesting.
- Not really.

290
00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:31,504
[chuckles]

291
00:19:37,093 --> 00:19:40,680
[American accent]
Well... see you around, sweetheart.

292
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:47,561
[chuckles]

293
00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:49,730
God.

294
00:19:50,773 --> 00:19:54,068
He seemed nice, funny.

295
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:57,613
Here we go. Nothing fancy. That's Pearl.

296
00:19:57,697 --> 00:20:00,449
Anna's in here too,
when she's not running around.

297
00:20:02,827 --> 00:20:05,454
We usually have six patients,

298
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:07,540
but, right now, we have seven
because of Luke.

299
00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:09,375
- He's down the hall.
- I like your pants.

300
00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:13,170
Oh. Thanks.

301
00:20:13,254 --> 00:20:16,215
I, uh... like your ponies.

302
00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:18,259
Thanks. [chuckles]

303
00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:22,596
Sorry.

304
00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:24,890
It's gross.

305
00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:29,854
Oh, this girl from the last place I was in
had a permanent tube in her stomach.

306
00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:31,731
She refused to chew.

307
00:20:31,814 --> 00:20:34,108
Ew. I chew.

308
00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:40,072
So, I'm gonna have to search this.
Any knives or X-Actos I should know about?

309
00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:42,867
- Are you cutter?
- Nope, not that on-trend.

310
00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:47,455
- Some of these girls are cutters?
- Oh, yeah.

311
00:20:47,538 --> 00:20:49,373
We have a lot of overachievers in here.

312
00:20:52,710 --> 00:20:55,546
- I'm gonna have to take these.
- It's just a multivitamin.

313
00:20:55,629 --> 00:21:00,384
It's a vitamin bottle.
Could be diet pills, speed, laxatives...

314
00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:04,764
And we don't have time to test
for everything. We'll give you a vitamin.

315
00:21:04,847 --> 00:21:06,932
And can I have your phone, please?

316
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:12,021
Do you have any other
electronic devices? iPad?

317
00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:15,316
My iPad doesn't even have wireless.
I just use it to draw.

318
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:19,111
Dr. Beckham says you should draw
on paper until he says different.

319
00:21:19,195 --> 00:21:23,407
- God, what did you say to him?
- I just explained the situation.

320
00:21:24,909 --> 00:21:27,328
Okay. Um...

321
00:21:27,411 --> 00:21:30,080
I should let you get settled, right?

322
00:21:30,164 --> 00:21:33,459
Uh, is Dr. Beckham here?
I'd like to just pop in before I go.

323
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:36,712
He's only here in the morning
and usually stops by after dinner.

324
00:21:37,755 --> 00:21:40,382
I just thought you should know
about her tricks.

325
00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:43,052
Oh. We know all the tricks.

326
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:45,054
[Pearl]
That's why we don't have any doors.

327
00:21:45,137 --> 00:21:48,933
They know we'd jog around the room
all day if nobody could see us.

328
00:21:49,016 --> 00:21:51,227
It'd be like the Rexie Olympics
up in here.

329
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:56,899
Okay. Call us if you need anything,
and, um... we'll see you soon, okay?

330
00:21:56,982 --> 00:21:58,901
- Be good.
- Okay.

331
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:02,363
Not too good. Not perfect.

332
00:22:02,446 --> 00:22:03,446
Got it.

333
00:22:05,282 --> 00:22:06,492
I got it.

334
00:22:19,421 --> 00:22:22,675
Pearl usually gives the tour,
but, obviously, she's not going anywhere.

335
00:22:22,758 --> 00:22:25,219
So, Luke is your guy.

336
00:22:25,302 --> 00:22:30,683
- Ellen, Luke.
- We've met. Onward.

337
00:22:33,269 --> 00:22:38,691
This, as you can see, is a living room.

338
00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:41,569
We meet here twice a day
for "Bitch and Bawl."

339
00:22:41,652 --> 00:22:42,695
What?

340
00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:44,446
It's what we call our group therapy.

341
00:22:44,530 --> 00:22:47,866
- Well, it's what I call group therapy.
- And what's the deal with levels?

342
00:22:47,950 --> 00:22:50,452
I prefer to think of them
as draconian points

343
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:52,413
earned for good behavior.

344
00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:56,166
Like when you were little
and you had chores, if you had chores.

345
00:22:56,250 --> 00:22:59,587
This is the torture chamber,
also known as the dining room.

346
00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:01,297
Chores, uh, which I never had

347
00:23:01,380 --> 00:23:03,660
because that would assume
I had parents who gave a shit...

348
00:23:03,716 --> 00:23:07,678
- So, you do chores to get points?
- Among other things, yes.

349
00:23:07,761 --> 00:23:11,307
And Lobo and the other nurses
and counselors can give them

350
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:12,975
or take them away at will.

351
00:23:13,058 --> 00:23:15,185
Amass enough points, level up.

352
00:23:15,269 --> 00:23:18,689
Earn extra privileges, like, you can
go out of the house on your own.

353
00:23:18,772 --> 00:23:22,443
I'm actually currently deciding
on where to go on my next outing.

354
00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:28,032
So far, I've eaten at nine of the places
on Jonathan Gold's essential 100 list.

355
00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:30,993
Jonathan Gold is my muse.

356
00:23:31,076 --> 00:23:33,329
Raymond Chandler was your muse
a few minutes ago.

357
00:23:33,412 --> 00:23:39,001
I know. Isn't that fantastic?
Nobody can keep up with me.

358
00:23:39,084 --> 00:23:40,753
Onward.

359
00:23:40,836 --> 00:23:43,964
So, welcome
to our new house member, Ellen.

360
00:23:44,048 --> 00:23:45,633
- Hi.
- Hi, Ellen.

361
00:23:45,716 --> 00:23:46,550
[Luke] Hello.

362
00:23:46,634 --> 00:23:49,386
So, how this works...
This is just an end of day check-in.

363
00:23:49,470 --> 00:23:51,680
The morning sessions
are a little more focused.

364
00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:55,893
This is just to talk about struggles
and our victories and...

365
00:23:55,976 --> 00:23:58,937
any other issues you might be having
here in the house.

366
00:23:59,938 --> 00:24:00,981
Let's start with Pearl.

367
00:24:04,860 --> 00:24:05,944
Struggle...

368
00:24:07,404 --> 00:24:14,662
I got tubed today,
and, uh... you know, it hurts.

369
00:24:14,745 --> 00:24:16,997
Now, I feel all...

370
00:24:18,374 --> 00:24:19,375
hot.

371
00:24:21,335 --> 00:24:24,713
I can't stop thinking
about how many calories are in that drip.

372
00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:27,091
- They won't say.
- Fifteen hundred.

373
00:24:29,593 --> 00:24:32,262
I looked it up.
I was tubed a couple times.

374
00:24:32,346 --> 00:24:33,531
Ellen, we try not to crosstalk.

375
00:24:33,555 --> 00:24:37,142
We don't talk about numbers
or weight or anything like that.

376
00:24:37,226 --> 00:24:39,353
- Sorry.
- [Pearl] Fifteen hundred?

377
00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:43,732
[woman] How are you feeling
right now, Pearl? It's okay.

378
00:24:43,816 --> 00:24:46,110
I don't know. Just...

379
00:24:49,571 --> 00:24:52,116
that it's hard getting better.

380
00:24:52,199 --> 00:24:55,994
And I'm guessing that you're worried
about how you're gonna be burning it off,

381
00:24:56,078 --> 00:24:57,879
especially when everybody's here
watching you?

382
00:24:59,039 --> 00:25:00,499
Do you know why you feel that way?

383
00:25:02,793 --> 00:25:07,256
- Because I... have an addiction?
- In a way, yes.

384
00:25:07,339 --> 00:25:09,925
When the exercise and the rituals kick in

385
00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:13,429
and... the cyclical thoughts
about weight take over,

386
00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:15,556
everything else goes away.

387
00:25:15,639 --> 00:25:18,559
And starving yourself
can make you feel euphoric,

388
00:25:18,642 --> 00:25:21,645
like a drug addict or an alcoholic.

389
00:25:22,855 --> 00:25:25,524
It's not about "thin enough," right?

390
00:25:25,607 --> 00:25:28,068
There's no "thin enough."
It doesn't exist.

391
00:25:28,152 --> 00:25:33,198
What you crave is the numbing
of the thing that you don't wanna feel.

392
00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:34,950
And we give you a lot of rope here.

393
00:25:35,033 --> 00:25:40,748
It's scary, but only you can decide...
to see what's good, to be alive.

394
00:25:40,831 --> 00:25:42,875
- You understand?
- Kind of.

395
00:25:44,251 --> 00:25:47,045
- I'm trying.
- Yeah, you are.

396
00:25:49,131 --> 00:25:50,382
Talk to me, brother.

397
00:25:50,466 --> 00:25:54,845
My victory was leading
a fantastic house tour...

398
00:25:54,928 --> 00:25:56,054
and earning another point,

399
00:25:56,138 --> 00:25:59,975
which means I get to go to Guelaguetza,
Oaxacan restaurant,

400
00:26:00,058 --> 00:26:03,687
number 26 on Mr. Gold's essential 100.

401
00:26:03,771 --> 00:26:10,319
And affordable, which is also essential.
Ballet companies don't pay you a fortune.

402
00:26:10,402 --> 00:26:13,614
That's great.
Talk to me about your struggles.

403
00:26:13,697 --> 00:26:16,784
Don't know, really. I guess
I'm obsessing about my injury

404
00:26:16,867 --> 00:26:19,995
and... if I'll be able to perform
when I get get out of here.

405
00:26:20,078 --> 00:26:23,499
- But I've got a goal. So, that's good.
- You have a couple of goals.

406
00:26:23,582 --> 00:26:26,585
Eating Oaxacan and getting healthy
so you can dance again.

407
00:26:26,668 --> 00:26:29,838
Damn straight.
I've got goals coming out my wazoo.

408
00:26:32,090 --> 00:26:33,090
Ellen?

409
00:26:35,093 --> 00:26:37,471
Struggle, um...

410
00:26:39,223 --> 00:26:41,016
Coming here.

411
00:26:41,099 --> 00:26:43,936
I mean,
accepting that I have to come here.

412
00:26:44,019 --> 00:26:47,356
So, maybe your victory
is that you're here.

413
00:26:48,607 --> 00:26:49,607
Hmm?

414
00:26:51,443 --> 00:26:52,486
Yeah, maybe.

415
00:26:58,492 --> 00:26:59,492
[sighs]

416
00:27:08,418 --> 00:27:11,213
Did Luke explain about meals?

417
00:27:11,296 --> 00:27:14,633
No. By the time we got to that,
he was onto some musical thing.

418
00:27:14,716 --> 00:27:17,761
- [Luke] ? Sugar blues ?
- That.

419
00:27:17,845 --> 00:27:22,391
? Everybody's singin' the sugar blues ?

420
00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:24,726
- ? Sugar blues ?
- Luke.

421
00:27:27,896 --> 00:27:29,898
- [Luke whimpers]
- Eat what you want.

422
00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:33,402
If you have special food,
like Kendra here does, that's fine.

423
00:27:33,485 --> 00:27:35,070
- We'll get it for you.
- That's it?

424
00:27:35,153 --> 00:27:39,658
No, you're definitely judged.
When you eat, points magically appear.

425
00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:42,345
What he means is, if you're maintaining
or moving towards your goal,

426
00:27:42,369 --> 00:27:43,370
you go up a level.

427
00:27:43,453 --> 00:27:45,205
- How you do it is up to you.
- Really?

428
00:27:45,289 --> 00:27:47,791
Yeah, but no one leaves the table
at mealtime,

429
00:27:47,875 --> 00:27:49,877
and bathrooms are locked
for 30 minutes after.

430
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:52,296
And there's no point pretending to eat

431
00:27:52,379 --> 00:27:55,465
or throwing up into the plants
or whatever.

432
00:27:55,549 --> 00:27:58,594
It smells, and it doesn't end up
on the scale.

433
00:27:58,677 --> 00:27:59,761
Got it.

434
00:28:01,597 --> 00:28:03,682
- Thank you, Lobo.
- De nada.

435
00:28:04,892 --> 00:28:08,687
- All right. Who wants to say grace?
- Oh, sorry.

436
00:28:12,482 --> 00:28:13,984
[Luke clears his throat]

437
00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:16,778
- [Luke] Dear Jesus...
- Take us to church.

438
00:28:16,862 --> 00:28:22,743
Allah, Oprah, My Little Pony,
or whoever your personal savior is...

439
00:28:22,826 --> 00:28:26,455
help us to give our bodies what they need
to grow strong and beautiful

440
00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:30,959
because every single person
at this table deserves to live.

441
00:28:31,043 --> 00:28:33,128
- Mm.
- Amen.

442
00:28:33,211 --> 00:28:34,212
[Luke] Bon appétit.

443
00:28:36,590 --> 00:28:37,590
Oh, yeah.

444
00:28:39,301 --> 00:28:43,222
Oh, my God.
This is so fucking good. Oh, my God.

445
00:28:47,517 --> 00:28:48,517
Pearl?

446
00:28:53,190 --> 00:28:56,610
You freaked her out with the 1500 thing.
I mean, it's not your fault...

447
00:28:56,693 --> 00:28:58,880
- I didn't mean...
- Oh, no, no, no. It's not your fault.

448
00:28:58,904 --> 00:29:00,239
I mean, don't stress.

449
00:29:01,573 --> 00:29:04,993
- How many in-patients have you done?
- Four.

450
00:29:05,077 --> 00:29:09,623
Six. The rest of these guys,
they have no idea.

451
00:29:11,291 --> 00:29:16,171
I mean, Pearl's not actually just upset
about the tube. She might get kicked out.

452
00:29:16,255 --> 00:29:20,425
Seriously? I mean, she looks pretty sick.

453
00:29:20,509 --> 00:29:23,262
No, Dr. Beck says that hospitals
are for sick people.

454
00:29:23,345 --> 00:29:25,055
We're here to get over that shit.

455
00:29:28,183 --> 00:29:29,476
Ice cream's my favorite.

456
00:29:29,559 --> 00:29:32,271
- It comes up the easiest.
- How do you know you got it all?

457
00:29:32,354 --> 00:29:34,523
When your barf is clear
and it doesn't burn anymore.

458
00:29:34,606 --> 00:29:38,193
Oh. I wish I could barf.
I'm only good at the binging part.

459
00:29:40,612 --> 00:29:44,866
- You purge?
- I tried. It's not my thing.

460
00:29:44,950 --> 00:29:47,286
So, how do you get rid of it
if you can't barf?

461
00:29:47,369 --> 00:29:49,288
- It's gross.
- Tell me.

462
00:29:49,371 --> 00:29:51,415
[chattering continues]

463
00:29:56,169 --> 00:30:01,717
Your ponies wouldn't want you to cry.
Hello Kitty wouldn't want you to cry.

464
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,719
[sobbing]

465
00:30:03,802 --> 00:30:08,140
The unicorn on the stairs
wouldn't want you to cry.

466
00:30:13,895 --> 00:30:15,397
[knocking on door]

467
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:17,399
[Beckham] Hey, there.

468
00:30:17,482 --> 00:30:19,818
- Settling in?
- Yeah.

469
00:30:21,153 --> 00:30:24,323
- Where's everyone else?
- May I?

470
00:30:25,782 --> 00:30:26,782
Okay.

471
00:30:29,661 --> 00:30:31,079
Anna went to the movies.

472
00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:33,957
Points.

473
00:30:35,667 --> 00:30:37,419
Cool.

474
00:30:37,502 --> 00:30:41,340
I'm having your family come in
for a group session tomorrow afternoon.

475
00:30:41,423 --> 00:30:43,008
It's standard when I see new patients.

476
00:30:43,091 --> 00:30:45,344
If it's productive,
we'll do it from time to time.

477
00:30:46,511 --> 00:30:47,596
Okay.

478
00:30:48,889 --> 00:30:51,516
- Even my mom?
- Even Mom.

479
00:30:52,851 --> 00:30:53,727
Wow.

480
00:30:53,810 --> 00:30:56,188
I told her it takes me longer
to drive in from the Valley

481
00:30:56,271 --> 00:30:57,773
than it does to fly from Phoenix.

482
00:31:02,486 --> 00:31:03,528
Okay, kiddo.

483
00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:06,114
Glad you're here.

484
00:31:09,743 --> 00:31:10,786
I didn't mean it.

485
00:31:12,245 --> 00:31:16,625
I... I mean, I didn't mean
for my drawings to do what they did.

486
00:31:17,918 --> 00:31:20,754
- What?
- On Tumblr.

487
00:31:20,837 --> 00:31:25,759
I know Susan told you what happened,
and... it'll come up, I bet.

488
00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:28,178
Right.

489
00:31:29,596 --> 00:31:32,516
I was just doing
what all my teachers told me to do.

490
00:31:32,599 --> 00:31:34,059
Draw what you know?

491
00:31:34,142 --> 00:31:37,187
- Yeah.
- I hear you.

492
00:31:37,270 --> 00:31:41,650
Just keep it for yourself, for now, okay?

493
00:31:43,068 --> 00:31:44,068
Okay.

494
00:31:45,487 --> 00:31:46,487
Good night.

495
00:31:54,538 --> 00:31:58,834
[rustling, clattering]

496
00:32:22,691 --> 00:32:24,484
[whispering] Oh. Sweaty.

497
00:32:24,568 --> 00:32:28,780
I ran home from the movies.
Don't tell anyone.

498
00:32:28,864 --> 00:32:30,115
[whispering] Okay.

499
00:32:30,198 --> 00:32:31,700
[chuckles]

500
00:32:31,783 --> 00:32:33,910
- What movie did you see?
- Oh, um...

501
00:32:33,994 --> 00:32:36,997
They were playing Shaun of the Dead
at the New Beverly with Zombieland.

502
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:38,790
- No way.
- Yeah.

503
00:32:40,041 --> 00:32:41,793
Emma Stone's kinda fat.
Don't you think?

504
00:32:41,877 --> 00:32:44,504
Oh, no, I think she's just big-boned.

505
00:32:45,797 --> 00:32:47,632
She's, like, at least, a size six.

506
00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:53,054
- Anyway, 'night.
- 'Night.

507
00:33:05,275 --> 00:33:07,194
Mutually assured destruction.

508
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:09,779
[chuckles] Right.

509
00:33:14,868 --> 00:33:17,621
I'm breaking 120 today, dolls.

510
00:33:17,704 --> 00:33:23,126
- Is that going up or down?
- Up. Eighty-nine when I came in.

511
00:33:23,210 --> 00:33:25,504
Eighty-nine? How tall are you?

512
00:33:28,882 --> 00:33:30,842
You're a beautiful unicorn.

513
00:33:32,135 --> 00:33:34,846
- You, cheer captain, come on.
- All right.

514
00:33:36,014 --> 00:33:37,015
Let's do this.

515
00:33:40,810 --> 00:33:44,189
Megan's been gaining. She's flipping out.

516
00:33:44,272 --> 00:33:48,610
But, I mean, she wants to,
I think, for her baby.

517
00:33:48,693 --> 00:33:52,572
- She... She's pregnant?
- Oh, nobody said?

518
00:33:52,656 --> 00:33:55,075
- Jesus, I didn't even think about...
- I know.

519
00:33:55,158 --> 00:33:58,036
That's why Luke calls her "the unicorn."

520
00:33:58,119 --> 00:34:02,541
She gets her period once and gets pregnant
off some guy she barely knows.

521
00:34:05,544 --> 00:34:06,878
I'm never having a baby.

522
00:34:08,463 --> 00:34:09,548
No way.

523
00:34:10,590 --> 00:34:13,385
[phone ringing]

524
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:14,469
Where are you?

525
00:34:17,055 --> 00:34:19,683
That's probably Dad, right?

526
00:34:19,766 --> 00:34:22,894
- Making some excuse.
- Yeah, annoying.

527
00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:27,274
- I heard them fighting this morning.
- Great.

528
00:34:28,316 --> 00:34:29,316
That's great.

529
00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:40,120
Oh, my God.

530
00:34:40,203 --> 00:34:42,038
Oh, my God.

531
00:34:42,122 --> 00:34:43,123
Mom...

532
00:34:44,541 --> 00:34:46,418
You... You look like a ghost.

533
00:34:48,628 --> 00:34:49,628
It's okay.

534
00:34:51,590 --> 00:34:52,591
Why?

535
00:34:55,635 --> 00:34:57,679
Mom, it's okay, it's okay.

536
00:34:57,762 --> 00:34:59,472
My God.

537
00:35:01,558 --> 00:35:04,603
- No dad?
- I'm sorry, work.

538
00:35:06,438 --> 00:35:08,607
Well, he has to support his family...

539
00:35:08,690 --> 00:35:12,444
and pay alimony, still,
and the medical bills and...

540
00:35:12,527 --> 00:35:13,527
Understood.

541
00:35:14,946 --> 00:35:17,282
Bet you didn't expect
this much "gynergy" today.

542
00:35:18,450 --> 00:35:21,870
I do think this is a record number
of mothers for one patient.

543
00:35:25,582 --> 00:35:29,461
Okay, I want everybody to understand
nobody's on trial here.

544
00:35:31,129 --> 00:35:33,048
I just want to get a sense of the family.

545
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,054
Well, until recently, Ellen lived with us.

546
00:35:39,137 --> 00:35:42,474
She moved in with her father
18 months ago.

547
00:35:42,557 --> 00:35:45,602
We thought it might be good for her
to heal that relationship.

548
00:35:45,685 --> 00:35:48,605
He's shown little interest
in who Ellen really is.

549
00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:51,316
He's only interested
in who he wants her to be.

550
00:35:51,399 --> 00:35:55,278
Ellen is an artist.
She's extremely bright and sensitive.

551
00:35:55,362 --> 00:35:58,782
She was never going to go into Chinese

552
00:35:58,865 --> 00:36:00,867
- or computers or what have you.
- What?

553
00:36:00,950 --> 00:36:03,286
Is that what you think
your dad wants for you?

554
00:36:05,705 --> 00:36:10,502
I don't know. I guess... I think he just
wants me to be able to make a living.

555
00:36:10,585 --> 00:36:14,297
- Exactly. Is that a crime?
- No crimes, remember?

556
00:36:14,381 --> 00:36:18,134
The point is, Ellen's father
never saw who she was.

557
00:36:18,218 --> 00:36:19,761
He left when she was very young...

558
00:36:19,844 --> 00:36:22,764
Yeah, because you were sleeping
with your best friend over there.

559
00:36:22,847 --> 00:36:25,488
- No, that's not why the marriage ended.
- There's a better reason?

560
00:36:25,558 --> 00:36:27,769
We are not here
to defend our relationship.

561
00:36:27,852 --> 00:36:30,247
When are you going to come up
with a different narrative, Susan?

562
00:36:30,271 --> 00:36:32,041
- [Susan] What narrative?
- [Judy] What narrative?

563
00:36:32,065 --> 00:36:33,668
- Susan...
- [Susan] No, this is the truth.

564
00:36:33,692 --> 00:36:36,736
- Jack didn't wanna have sex.
- Well, he likes it with me just fine.

565
00:36:36,820 --> 00:36:39,447
- Twice a week, like clockwork.
- Oh, my God.

566
00:36:39,531 --> 00:36:41,825
[Susan] Besides, he's not the one
who abandoned her.

567
00:36:41,908 --> 00:36:43,952
We did not abandon Ellen.
We moved to Phoenix.

568
00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,705
They threw her out.
They put her bags on the street.

569
00:36:46,788 --> 00:36:50,709
Because we'd been dealing
with Ellen's illness alone for years.

570
00:36:50,792 --> 00:36:53,670
I didn't abandon my daughter.
I love her more than life.

571
00:36:53,753 --> 00:36:57,048
I just didn't know what to do.
She's dying right in front of us.

572
00:37:00,343 --> 00:37:02,637
What's going on with you right now?

573
00:37:10,353 --> 00:37:11,396
I'm sorry...

574
00:37:14,357 --> 00:37:16,401
that I'm not a person anymore.

575
00:37:16,484 --> 00:37:17,652
I'm a problem.

576
00:37:22,824 --> 00:37:25,160
- And it's all my fault.
- Fuck fault.

577
00:37:26,453 --> 00:37:31,916
Fault and blame have no place here.
Only how you wanna live, moving forward.

578
00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,084
Who you wanna be.

579
00:37:40,091 --> 00:37:44,137
How about you, Kelly?
What do you think of all this?

580
00:37:45,430 --> 00:37:47,182
Um... I, uh...

581
00:37:48,308 --> 00:37:49,851
[inhales deeply]

582
00:37:49,934 --> 00:37:52,020
I feel kind of angry, I guess.

583
00:37:53,938 --> 00:37:56,024
I just... I just don't really...
Really get it.

584
00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:58,526
You know, just... eat.

585
00:38:00,361 --> 00:38:03,549
I don't know. It's just like... It's not
her life that she's just missing out on.

586
00:38:03,573 --> 00:38:04,573
It's...

587
00:38:05,909 --> 00:38:07,410
[exhales]

588
00:38:07,494 --> 00:38:10,288
It's my life, too.
You know, I don't get to have...

589
00:38:11,873 --> 00:38:12,873
a sister.

590
00:38:16,586 --> 00:38:20,715
You know, I look at pictures
of my prom and stuff, and...

591
00:38:22,550 --> 00:38:25,094
and all I think of is, like,
"Oh, that's when...

592
00:38:25,178 --> 00:38:27,347
Ellen was in the hospital," or...

593
00:38:27,430 --> 00:38:29,849
"That's when she fainted on the bus."

594
00:38:29,933 --> 00:38:30,933
[Beckham] All right.

595
00:38:32,101 --> 00:38:35,063
And all of my friends,
they think that she's some kind of freak.

596
00:38:35,146 --> 00:38:38,316
- Like, a freak who killed a girl.
- Because of the blog?

597
00:38:38,399 --> 00:38:40,401
- Tumblr.
- [Kelly] Yeah, and that's bad enough,

598
00:38:40,485 --> 00:38:44,113
but now, people wanna be like her
and look like her

599
00:38:44,197 --> 00:38:46,115
and go through what she's going through.

600
00:38:46,199 --> 00:38:48,409
Nobody died
because of Ellen's artwork, okay?

601
00:38:48,493 --> 00:38:51,538
There's plenty of stuff out there
for people to fetishize.

602
00:38:51,621 --> 00:38:55,208
But that certainly didn't help,
to have notoriety for starving...

603
00:38:55,291 --> 00:38:56,417
But that's what I'm saying.

604
00:38:56,501 --> 00:38:58,479
- Ellen has talent.
- [Susan] I didn't say she doesn't.

605
00:38:58,503 --> 00:39:01,714
[Judy] But if you hadn't made her
take her artwork away from her audience,

606
00:39:01,798 --> 00:39:02,983
she might have found her voice.

607
00:39:03,007 --> 00:39:06,511
[Susan] Ellen took it down herself
after that young woman died

608
00:39:06,594 --> 00:39:08,888
because she knew
it was the right thing to do.

609
00:39:08,972 --> 00:39:11,158
- [Olive] You are so full of shit, Susan.
- [Susan] What?

610
00:39:11,182 --> 00:39:12,942
[Olive]
Do you even hear what Judy is saying?

611
00:39:12,976 --> 00:39:14,056
[Susan] A young women died.

612
00:39:14,102 --> 00:39:16,187
- No, no, no.
- Meet me in the car.

613
00:39:18,731 --> 00:39:20,608
[doors opening]

614
00:39:20,692 --> 00:39:24,863
I'm sorry, we just...
We just can't take you with us right now.

615
00:39:24,946 --> 00:39:26,155
[doors closing]

616
00:39:27,574 --> 00:39:29,454
- We're gonna miss our plane.
- Okay, all right.

617
00:39:29,534 --> 00:39:30,952
- All right?
- Okay.

618
00:39:31,035 --> 00:39:34,455
Ellen... be strong, okay?

619
00:39:39,252 --> 00:39:40,252
[doors opening]

620
00:39:43,381 --> 00:39:44,382
[doors closing]

621
00:39:45,675 --> 00:39:48,028
Hey, I'm really sorry
if I got you in any sort of trouble...

622
00:39:48,052 --> 00:39:52,724
- Please, no, I'm sorry. I hate that...
- No, no, no, it's... it's whatever.

623
00:39:52,807 --> 00:39:54,017
You can forget it.

624
00:39:56,603 --> 00:39:59,522
[chuckles] What a shit-show.

625
00:39:59,606 --> 00:40:01,691
[both laughing]

626
00:40:01,774 --> 00:40:05,486
You really need to get better so you never
have to see those people ever again.

627
00:40:05,570 --> 00:40:07,655
[takes deep breath]

628
00:40:14,329 --> 00:40:15,496
If you die...

629
00:40:17,206 --> 00:40:18,333
I will kill you.

630
00:40:23,630 --> 00:40:24,672
[inhales deeply]

631
00:40:24,756 --> 00:40:26,507
Okay. I'll see you.

632
00:40:32,055 --> 00:40:33,055
See ya.

633
00:40:34,766 --> 00:40:36,726
[doors opening]

634
00:40:40,730 --> 00:40:42,065
[doors closing]

635
00:40:50,740 --> 00:40:51,783
[knocking on door]

636
00:40:52,784 --> 00:40:55,203
- Dinner.
- I'm staying up here.

637
00:40:56,204 --> 00:40:59,958
You don't have to eat, but the rule
is that everyone has to sit down.

638
00:41:28,319 --> 00:41:29,737
[sniffs]

639
00:41:29,821 --> 00:41:31,614
[groans]

640
00:41:31,698 --> 00:41:32,865
[exhales]

641
00:41:39,163 --> 00:41:41,249
[Luke] Have you been thinking
about baby names?

642
00:41:41,332 --> 00:41:42,166
Not yet.

643
00:41:42,250 --> 00:41:45,670
I have a whole list of favorites
that you can have.

644
00:41:45,753 --> 00:41:48,339
I was actually considering a new moniker.

645
00:41:48,423 --> 00:41:52,468
- What about Dean or Tex?
- When I get out of the first trimester.

646
00:41:52,552 --> 00:41:54,446
[Luke] Do you want to get out
of the first trimester?

647
00:41:54,470 --> 00:41:57,015
- Jesus, Luke.
- Stay out of this, Mia.

648
00:41:57,098 --> 00:42:01,185
This is between us rexies.
She knows what I'm talking about.

649
00:42:01,269 --> 00:42:07,233
I don't know. I'm terrified.
It just feels so... out of control.

650
00:42:07,316 --> 00:42:09,610
But it's kind of a miracle, you know?

651
00:42:09,694 --> 00:42:14,532
'Cause I didn't think anything
was working down there. So, maybe...

652
00:42:16,075 --> 00:42:17,785
I'm supposed to have this baby.

653
00:42:20,913 --> 00:42:21,956
And I want to.

654
00:42:23,499 --> 00:42:26,878
I just want to think about something
besides me for once.

655
00:42:26,961 --> 00:42:28,212
[Luke] Amen, sister.

656
00:42:28,296 --> 00:42:31,716
- [Pearl] We should have a baby shower.
- No, I don't wanna jinx it.

657
00:42:31,799 --> 00:42:34,552
- No, please. A shower would be so cute.
- Yeah, no.

658
00:42:37,221 --> 00:42:38,556
All right, fine. Maybe.

659
00:42:38,639 --> 00:42:41,601
- If I get past 12 weeks.
- Yay!

660
00:42:42,643 --> 00:42:47,065
Well, we're gonna help you make it past.
Every bite you take feeds the miracle.

661
00:42:48,983 --> 00:42:49,901
[chuckles]

662
00:42:49,984 --> 00:42:51,652
[Megan] Pass the potatoes.

663
00:42:53,988 --> 00:42:55,174
- Oh, my God...
- Are you sure?

664
00:42:55,198 --> 00:42:56,616
- I don't know.
- Here they are.

665
00:42:56,699 --> 00:42:58,242
- Just don't talk.
- Here they are.

666
00:42:58,326 --> 00:43:01,454
- Miracle potatoes.
- [Luke] Miracle, miracle potatoes.

667
00:43:01,537 --> 00:43:03,081
- I like that.
- [Megan] Pretty good.

668
00:43:03,164 --> 00:43:05,041
[laughs]

669
00:43:05,124 --> 00:43:07,335
How about the newbie? How you doin'?

670
00:43:09,212 --> 00:43:10,254
Finished.

671
00:43:14,926 --> 00:43:18,262
- What happened?
- She had family therapy today.

672
00:43:19,514 --> 00:43:21,265
- Oh.
- Makes sense.

673
00:43:21,349 --> 00:43:22,391
Mm-hmm.

674
00:43:22,475 --> 00:43:26,062
Hey. I missed dinner.

675
00:43:26,145 --> 00:43:27,730
I found your barf stash.

676
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:35,321
Keep this to yourself
and I'll get you some laxatives.

677
00:43:35,404 --> 00:43:38,116
- I don't... I don't use...
- Come on, I know you want them.

678
00:43:39,158 --> 00:43:41,911
You think I haven't seen
that thing that you do?

679
00:43:41,994 --> 00:43:43,454
What thing?

680
00:43:43,538 --> 00:43:44,539
[sighs]

681
00:43:46,791 --> 00:43:50,628
Making sure your arm doesn't get bigger
than, what, a silver dollar?

682
00:43:53,714 --> 00:43:54,715
Deal.

683
00:44:20,700 --> 00:44:21,909
Cigarette for dinner.

684
00:44:23,286 --> 00:44:25,538
- That's not gonna get you points.
- Not in the mood.

685
00:44:27,290 --> 00:44:28,290
Okay.

686
00:44:31,919 --> 00:44:34,964
And who in hell made you
house den mother?

687
00:44:35,047 --> 00:44:37,425
You walk around here
like you've got it all figured out.

688
00:44:37,508 --> 00:44:39,177
Well, if you're so fixed and special,

689
00:44:39,260 --> 00:44:41,137
why don't you go back
to New Jersey or London

690
00:44:41,220 --> 00:44:42,541
or wherever the fuck you're from?

691
00:44:42,597 --> 00:44:46,559
I am going back,
as soon as my BMI's closer to my age.

692
00:44:46,642 --> 00:44:48,728
But right now,
I'd rather try and help people

693
00:44:48,811 --> 00:44:50,479
than mope about feeling sorry for myself.

694
00:44:50,563 --> 00:44:52,440
You have no idea how I'm feeling.

695
00:44:52,523 --> 00:44:55,610
- I never said I did.
- And what? You wanna help people?

696
00:44:55,693 --> 00:44:57,236
What are you, a doctor now?

697
00:44:57,320 --> 00:45:00,698
- You feel pretty proud of yourself?
- Yeah, I am, actually.

698
00:45:00,781 --> 00:45:03,534
I'm moving the needle
in the right direction.

699
00:45:03,618 --> 00:45:05,161
Sorry if that scares you.

700
00:45:05,244 --> 00:45:07,997
But people actually go home sometimes
and have a life,

701
00:45:08,080 --> 00:45:10,291
even people with fucked-up families.

702
00:45:12,126 --> 00:45:15,671
Yeah. There goes
that fucking excuse again, huh?

703
00:45:23,095 --> 00:45:24,095
[scoffs]

704
00:46:08,391 --> 00:46:10,309
[knocking on door]

705
00:46:11,727 --> 00:46:12,727
Enter.

706
00:46:14,647 --> 00:46:15,815
Hey.

707
00:46:18,275 --> 00:46:22,530
- Hey.
- Don't be all pleased with yourself.

708
00:46:22,613 --> 00:46:26,409
Wow. I never thought I'd meet anyone
more defensive than I am.

709
00:46:26,492 --> 00:46:27,492
And yet...

710
00:46:28,953 --> 00:46:30,287
So, you've been here awhile.

711
00:46:32,039 --> 00:46:33,040
Six months.

712
00:46:34,709 --> 00:46:38,004
- Is that you?
- Hard to believe, I know.

713
00:46:38,087 --> 00:46:42,508
I didn't mean that... [scoffs]
Yeah, I can tell that it's you.

714
00:46:42,591 --> 00:46:44,719
Incredible.

715
00:46:44,802 --> 00:46:48,597
You know what it's like to be 19
and feel like you've already peaked?

716
00:46:48,681 --> 00:46:49,807
Um, a relief.

717
00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:50,891
[chuckles]

718
00:46:52,018 --> 00:46:57,982
No. I loved it.
I could push it and push it.

719
00:46:58,065 --> 00:47:01,569
And then I broke
and went batshit, obviously.

720
00:47:02,862 --> 00:47:06,073
But my knee's getting better,
and my company director says

721
00:47:06,157 --> 00:47:09,660
he'll have a place for me
as soon as I get my act together, so...

722
00:47:09,744 --> 00:47:12,288
- It's my drawing.
- Yeah.

723
00:47:13,539 --> 00:47:16,709
I printed it off your Tumblr,
like, a year ago.

724
00:47:16,792 --> 00:47:19,712
That's why I acted like such a spaz
when you first got here.

725
00:47:19,795 --> 00:47:21,547
- You're like my...
- You're muse?

726
00:47:21,630 --> 00:47:22,673
Shut up.

727
00:47:25,426 --> 00:47:27,845
I just figured, somebody so talented,

728
00:47:27,928 --> 00:47:30,931
I had to be brilliantly charming
to get you to like me.

729
00:47:31,015 --> 00:47:34,435
- Well, you overshot.
- I'm aware.

730
00:47:35,478 --> 00:47:38,647
In my defense, though,
I've been running on empty for so long

731
00:47:38,731 --> 00:47:43,027
that when I actually eat now,
I get this crazy burst of energy.

732
00:47:43,110 --> 00:47:47,239
- That's why you're so weird.
- I'm always weird. That's why I'm...

733
00:47:48,657 --> 00:47:49,700
assertive.

734
00:47:51,035 --> 00:47:58,417
How do you do it? Eat.
I mean, I see you, and I just... I get...

735
00:47:58,501 --> 00:48:03,756
I get all panicky even thinking about it,
like, the world is gonna fall apart.

736
00:48:03,839 --> 00:48:08,552
I feel that way. But you know,
feel the fear and do it anyway.

737
00:48:08,636 --> 00:48:11,263
Yeah, but aren't you scared
you won't be able to stop?

738
00:48:11,347 --> 00:48:13,682
- That you're just gonna...
- Be like one of those guys

739
00:48:13,766 --> 00:48:17,103
who has to be lifted out of his bed
with a crane?

740
00:48:17,186 --> 00:48:20,189
Yeah, but Dr. Beck says
that's not gonna happen, so...

741
00:48:20,272 --> 00:48:24,026
- Yeah, but he has to say that.
- Well, he's pretty straight-up.

742
00:48:24,110 --> 00:48:26,695
Plus, I'm not gonna lie.
I'm really fuckin' hungry.

743
00:48:26,779 --> 00:48:27,779
[laughs]

744
00:48:27,822 --> 00:48:30,157
Like, two years worth of hungry.

745
00:48:32,076 --> 00:48:36,205
Whenever I can't sleep, I draw food.

746
00:48:36,288 --> 00:48:38,958
Oh, yeah? Like... what?

747
00:48:39,041 --> 00:48:42,169
- Do you know what a Goo Goo Cluster is?
- Oh, my God.

748
00:48:43,379 --> 00:48:46,757
Yeah, greatest candy bar ever.

749
00:48:46,841 --> 00:48:51,679
- Peanuty, marshmallowy greatness.
- [laughs]

750
00:48:51,762 --> 00:48:55,599
Oh, it's 240 calories there,
110 from fat.

751
00:48:55,683 --> 00:48:57,852
Whoa. Calorie Asperger's.

752
00:48:57,935 --> 00:48:58,936
[scoffs]

753
00:48:59,019 --> 00:49:03,149
- Maybe.
- My last meal would be a whole box of 'em.

754
00:49:03,232 --> 00:49:07,278
Oh, yeah?
How would you eat them? Show me.

755
00:49:09,071 --> 00:49:10,614
[scoffs]

756
00:49:10,698 --> 00:49:11,740
You wish.

757
00:49:13,742 --> 00:49:16,704
Um, right. Well, I'd better...

758
00:49:16,787 --> 00:49:18,122
Right, right, right. Yes.

759
00:49:19,373 --> 00:49:21,709
- See you tomorrow?
- Where else would I be?

760
00:49:23,127 --> 00:49:24,127
Good night.

761
00:49:26,172 --> 00:49:27,173
[sighs]

762
00:49:28,465 --> 00:49:29,465
Epic.

763
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:36,223
Step on.

764
00:49:36,307 --> 00:49:38,726
- Unless you wanna face the other way.
- No, I'm good.

765
00:49:40,144 --> 00:49:42,479
I didn't sew rocks into my panties,
if you're worried.

766
00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:44,523
I'm not.

767
00:49:54,200 --> 00:49:55,201
Step off.

768
00:49:57,620 --> 00:49:59,622
Wow, that's bad.

769
00:50:02,249 --> 00:50:05,252
You know what the body burns
after there's no more fat?

770
00:50:05,336 --> 00:50:08,964
Muscle. Organ tissue.

771
00:50:09,048 --> 00:50:11,648
Pretty soon, you're gonna be
flopping around like a boneless fish.

772
00:50:13,510 --> 00:50:16,513
Thanks for that.
Yeah, I'm scared straight.

773
00:50:20,351 --> 00:50:21,852
Anna, you're next!

774
00:50:21,936 --> 00:50:24,104
[dramatic music playing on TV]

775
00:50:24,188 --> 00:50:26,482
[growling]

776
00:50:26,565 --> 00:50:27,900
I want a baby dragon.

777
00:50:35,032 --> 00:50:37,243
- Megan?
- Huh?

778
00:50:37,326 --> 00:50:40,204
- What do you think?
- It's good.

779
00:50:40,287 --> 00:50:41,747
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

780
00:50:41,830 --> 00:50:42,915
Okay, I'll finish it.

781
00:50:45,542 --> 00:50:47,044
[whispering] I told her not to.

782
00:50:50,381 --> 00:50:51,882
You feel anything?

783
00:50:54,176 --> 00:50:55,176
Not yet.

784
00:50:56,053 --> 00:51:01,517
I like what you said before...
about thinking more about somebody else.

785
00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:02,643
Yeah.

786
00:51:04,395 --> 00:51:09,817
I think that's what being a mom
is supposed to be about... you know?

787
00:51:09,900 --> 00:51:13,487
- Putting the kid first.
- Yeah.

788
00:51:13,570 --> 00:51:17,074
Yeah, it's not like I know
what I'm talking about, but...

789
00:51:17,157 --> 00:51:19,743
No, I... I think you do.

790
00:51:22,246 --> 00:51:24,748
- You're gonna be a good mom.
- [Luke] ? Sugar blues ?

791
00:51:24,832 --> 00:51:29,503
- Thank you.
- ? Everybody's singing the sugar... ?

792
00:51:30,504 --> 00:51:31,504
Huh.

793
00:51:35,551 --> 00:51:37,177
Good evening, ladies.

794
00:51:37,261 --> 00:51:39,096
- Good evening.
- Hi, Luke.

795
00:51:39,179 --> 00:51:41,724
- [plastic rustling]
- Oh, wh...

796
00:51:41,807 --> 00:51:44,560
- What is...? What's that noise?
- [plastic rustling]

797
00:51:44,643 --> 00:51:48,814
You hear that?
It's so weird. I feel like there's, uh...

798
00:51:48,897 --> 00:51:51,150
Oh...

799
00:51:51,233 --> 00:51:52,693
Oh.

800
00:51:57,114 --> 00:51:58,866
You know you want it.

801
00:51:58,949 --> 00:52:00,617
Shh!

802
00:52:00,701 --> 00:52:03,370
Okay, don't make it a sex thing.

803
00:52:03,454 --> 00:52:06,206
It is a sex thing. Don't pretend it's not.

804
00:52:07,207 --> 00:52:08,207
Ready?

805
00:52:10,085 --> 00:52:11,337
Oh...

806
00:52:12,796 --> 00:52:14,923
[laughs]

807
00:52:15,007 --> 00:52:16,133
Oh, there it is.

808
00:52:17,176 --> 00:52:19,470
- I... I can't.
- You can.

809
00:52:19,553 --> 00:52:25,726
Chew, swallow.
The world will not implode, I swear.

810
00:52:26,852 --> 00:52:29,855
Come on, do it.

811
00:52:29,938 --> 00:52:30,939
Do it.

812
00:52:33,734 --> 00:52:34,735
Do it.

813
00:52:37,780 --> 00:52:38,906
[sniffing]

814
00:52:40,491 --> 00:52:43,285
- God.
- Right?

815
00:52:43,369 --> 00:52:44,661
- Hmm.
- Touch it.

816
00:52:44,745 --> 00:52:47,414
We can hear you, freak.

817
00:52:47,498 --> 00:52:52,378
- Yeah, freak, don't be so gross.
- Come on, just a little. Get it on you.

818
00:52:52,461 --> 00:52:55,089
Come on, get it on you.

819
00:52:58,217 --> 00:52:59,217
[chuckles]

820
00:53:00,928 --> 00:53:02,971
Right? Okay.

821
00:53:03,055 --> 00:53:06,767
Now, a little bite... for me.

822
00:53:07,935 --> 00:53:09,895
- For you?
- Mm-hmm.

823
00:53:09,978 --> 00:53:13,315
I didn't even like you
until five minutes ago, so, like...

824
00:53:13,399 --> 00:53:16,652
- Maybe just, you know, not...
- You like me.

825
00:53:16,735 --> 00:53:18,278
- You like me.
- Shut up.

826
00:53:18,362 --> 00:53:19,988
- She likes me.
- Shut up.

827
00:53:20,072 --> 00:53:23,200
- Don't press your luck.
- She likes me. You like me.

828
00:53:23,283 --> 00:53:24,743
- Take a bite.
- Can we be done?

829
00:53:24,827 --> 00:53:27,913
- You like me. Come on. Have a little bite.
- Okay, seriously, back off!

830
00:53:31,291 --> 00:53:32,334
God...

831
00:53:35,379 --> 00:53:37,172
[chuckles] Coward.

832
00:53:39,174 --> 00:53:41,552
Tomorrow, you bite.

833
00:53:50,769 --> 00:53:52,479
Luke just made me touch chocolate.

834
00:53:52,563 --> 00:53:54,440
[chuckles]

835
00:53:54,523 --> 00:53:58,068
- He's so weird.
- He's totally weird sometimes.

836
00:54:01,447 --> 00:54:03,532
[inhales deeply]

837
00:54:05,826 --> 00:54:10,080
I think the baby just moved.
Smell that. Yeah, get in on that.

838
00:54:10,164 --> 00:54:13,667
- Is anybody watching this movie?
- Nobody cares about dragons.

839
00:54:13,750 --> 00:54:16,170
[Beckham] How are you doing
after family therapy?

840
00:54:16,253 --> 00:54:18,653
It's pretty much how it always is
when my folks are together.

841
00:54:18,714 --> 00:54:21,008
- Minus your dad.
- Like I said.

842
00:54:22,217 --> 00:54:25,220
But I don't feel as bad
as I thought I was going to.

843
00:54:25,304 --> 00:54:26,388
Why do you think that is?

844
00:54:27,806 --> 00:54:29,847
I'm getting to know
some of the people in the house.

845
00:54:30,934 --> 00:54:33,187
Some of them actually seem
like they're doing okay.

846
00:54:33,270 --> 00:54:36,940
- I hope so.
- No, I mean, really okay.

847
00:54:38,567 --> 00:54:42,613
Like they might get lives
and be semi-interesting people.

848
00:54:42,696 --> 00:54:46,325
Did you just say
something vaguely optimistic?

849
00:54:46,408 --> 00:54:47,701
I did say "semi"...

850
00:54:49,244 --> 00:54:50,787
but... yeah.

851
00:54:54,958 --> 00:54:57,169
- So, the family...
- Can I be honest?

852
00:54:57,252 --> 00:55:01,131
I've talked about my dad,
all that family stuff.

853
00:55:02,341 --> 00:55:04,551
I have issues. Whatever.

854
00:55:05,552 --> 00:55:08,055
Talk is not helping.

855
00:55:08,138 --> 00:55:09,681
I think you're right.

856
00:55:10,724 --> 00:55:14,144
- Really?
- Generally, I just need a few facts.

857
00:55:14,228 --> 00:55:16,021
And we're never doing
family therapy again.

858
00:55:16,104 --> 00:55:20,817
It doesn't seem to be useful here.
That was a shit-show.

859
00:55:20,901 --> 00:55:21,777
[laughs]

860
00:55:21,860 --> 00:55:24,821
- Yeah, that's what my sister said.
- I liked her.

861
00:55:24,905 --> 00:55:28,492
- Yeah, me too. We get along great.
- I could tell.

862
00:55:28,575 --> 00:55:32,496
She was the only one who had something
to say that wasn't entirely self-serving.

863
00:55:32,579 --> 00:55:33,580
Yeah.

864
00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:39,545
- Now, I'm gonna be honest with you.
- Uh-oh.

865
00:55:41,171 --> 00:55:44,258
- I'm not crazy about your name.
- What?

866
00:55:44,341 --> 00:55:47,219
"Ellen" doesn't suit you.
It's too old-fashioned.

867
00:55:48,428 --> 00:55:51,098
- I've never really liked it.
- So, change it.

868
00:55:51,181 --> 00:55:52,849
I can't just change it.

869
00:55:54,893 --> 00:55:55,936
I can't, right?

870
00:55:56,019 --> 00:55:58,647
Just tell people to call you
by a different name.

871
00:55:58,730 --> 00:56:01,191
Or, if you wanna make it legal,
you can fill out a form online

872
00:56:01,275 --> 00:56:02,609
in about ten minutes.

873
00:56:04,236 --> 00:56:05,654
I was thinking "Ellie."

874
00:56:06,697 --> 00:56:10,367
- Ooh...
- That's no good. No.

875
00:56:10,450 --> 00:56:12,077
How about...

876
00:56:13,287 --> 00:56:14,496
"Eli"?

877
00:56:23,422 --> 00:56:24,464
Call me "Eli."

878
00:56:26,925 --> 00:56:28,343
[both laugh]

879
00:56:28,427 --> 00:56:31,179
- You get your iPad?
- Oh, yeah.

880
00:56:31,263 --> 00:56:33,849
The world opens up
beyond your wildest dreams

881
00:56:33,932 --> 00:56:35,309
when you put on some LBs.

882
00:56:35,392 --> 00:56:36,268
[scoffs]

883
00:56:36,351 --> 00:56:38,103
- Eli?
- Yeah.

884
00:56:38,186 --> 00:56:40,397
Don't tell me you're gay now, too.

885
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:44,359
The male population cannot take
another quality defection.

886
00:56:44,443 --> 00:56:47,571
- Most definitely not gay.
- Thank God.

887
00:56:47,654 --> 00:56:53,577
No, "Eli" is a... new name for me.

888
00:56:53,660 --> 00:56:55,912
Ellen... Eli...

889
00:56:55,996 --> 00:57:00,334
Hm, I like it. It's very... George Sand.

890
00:57:00,417 --> 00:57:02,169
[both laugh]

891
00:57:03,962 --> 00:57:06,757
You're dazzling. You know that, Eli?

892
00:57:08,383 --> 00:57:14,222
So, I'm officially inviting Eli
to my dinner out tomorrow night.

893
00:57:14,306 --> 00:57:16,725
As part of my reward,
I can take anyone I want.

894
00:57:16,808 --> 00:57:19,061
Um, I'm not really restaurant ready,
but thanks.

895
00:57:19,144 --> 00:57:23,982
It can be your pick. It doesn't even have
to be on Mr. Gold's essential 100.

896
00:57:24,066 --> 00:57:26,193
No, you should take someone
who bites and chews...

897
00:57:26,276 --> 00:57:28,487
We can walk there.

898
00:57:28,570 --> 00:57:34,409
All the way to Hollywood or wherever,
and you don't have to eat.

899
00:57:37,496 --> 00:57:38,538
Can I run?

900
00:57:40,165 --> 00:57:45,921
- I don't run, psycho. My knee, remember?
- Well, can you walk fast?

901
00:57:46,004 --> 00:57:48,465
[Luke] I read that it doesn't matter
how fast you walk.

902
00:57:48,548 --> 00:57:50,801
It's distance.
You burn the same amount of calories.

903
00:57:50,884 --> 00:57:53,679
- That's bullshit.
- Will you just slow down a little?

904
00:57:53,762 --> 00:57:55,514
I'm not even going that fast.

905
00:57:55,597 --> 00:57:56,765
Um...

906
00:57:56,848 --> 00:58:00,310
I will have the number 12
with the rice and the egg roll.

907
00:58:00,394 --> 00:58:02,187
Mm-hmm.

908
00:58:02,270 --> 00:58:03,814
Can I have the Tom Tum Kai soup?

909
00:58:03,897 --> 00:58:05,941
- It comes with your entrée.
- Oh, that's all...

910
00:58:06,024 --> 00:58:08,402
She'll have the number 12, too,
with the egg roll.

911
00:58:08,485 --> 00:58:09,403
No.

912
00:58:09,486 --> 00:58:10,862
- Yes.
- No.

913
00:58:10,946 --> 00:58:13,991
She'll have the number 12, too,
with the egg roll.

914
00:58:15,367 --> 00:58:17,744
- And to drink?
- We'll have two Tsingtao.

915
00:58:18,996 --> 00:58:19,996
Your ID?

916
00:58:22,791 --> 00:58:24,459
[Luke sighs, chuckles]

917
00:58:24,543 --> 00:58:30,257
I... I don't wanna put you
on the spot or anything, um...

918
00:58:30,340 --> 00:58:31,591
but we're from the hospice.

919
00:58:34,094 --> 00:58:35,137
For cancer.

920
00:58:38,181 --> 00:58:40,058
Um...

921
00:58:40,142 --> 00:58:43,854
- I'm sorry. I can't serve you without ID.
- It's just, um...

922
00:58:44,855 --> 00:58:46,273
This is our first date.

923
00:58:48,358 --> 00:58:51,528
It's maybe our only date. I just...

924
00:58:52,779 --> 00:58:55,198
I don't know. I wanted it to be special.

925
00:59:04,374 --> 00:59:06,376
[quietly] Thank you very much.

926
00:59:09,087 --> 00:59:11,214
[both laughing]

927
00:59:11,298 --> 00:59:14,801
We can pick a different disease
for different restaurants.

928
00:59:14,885 --> 00:59:16,678
You're so sick.

929
00:59:16,762 --> 00:59:18,346
- We both are, actually.
- Yeah.

930
00:59:22,392 --> 00:59:25,645
I put it in there
so nobody would ask questions.

931
00:59:25,729 --> 00:59:29,316
- Thank you. Thank you so much.
- [Luke] Yeah.

932
00:59:30,484 --> 00:59:31,484
[laughs]

933
00:59:32,402 --> 00:59:33,820
? Oh... ?

934
00:59:33,904 --> 00:59:36,031
- You are so...
- ? Oh... ?

935
00:59:37,240 --> 00:59:39,326
- Are you...?
- ? Oh... ?

936
00:59:39,409 --> 00:59:40,911
[both laughing]

937
00:59:41,995 --> 00:59:44,247
You are so wrong.

938
00:59:50,545 --> 00:59:52,047
- [Luke] Hmm?
- Mm-hmm.

939
00:59:52,130 --> 00:59:54,966
- Bite.
- I don't like egg rolls.

940
00:59:55,050 --> 00:59:56,510
Who doesn't like egg rolls?

941
00:59:56,593 --> 00:59:59,679
Chew and spit if you wanna be lame,
but you look thinner.

942
00:59:59,763 --> 01:00:01,431
If I taste it, will you leave me alone?

943
01:00:01,515 --> 01:00:04,476
If you taste everything,
I will leave you alone.

944
01:00:06,520 --> 01:00:09,815
Oh, yeah. So good.

945
01:00:09,898 --> 01:00:11,233
- Yeah.
- Mm.

946
01:00:13,110 --> 01:00:15,612
- Mm!
- Right? It's good, right?

947
01:00:15,695 --> 01:00:17,823
Uh-huh. Mm.

948
01:00:17,906 --> 01:00:19,950
- Swallow that egg roll.
- Blegh!

949
01:00:20,033 --> 01:00:21,159
Oh...

950
01:00:23,328 --> 01:00:24,328
Oh!

951
01:00:25,914 --> 01:00:30,210
Jesus Christ.
That was a thing of great beauty.

952
01:00:31,336 --> 01:00:34,005
- That's super hot.
- I know. It's what I was going for.

953
01:00:35,090 --> 01:00:38,969
So, I find out I can pull
the patient ID thing all the way up my arm

954
01:00:39,052 --> 01:00:40,595
and hide it underneath my T-shirt,

955
01:00:40,679 --> 01:00:45,225
and I just get out past
the nurse's station, I just walk out.

956
01:00:45,308 --> 01:00:48,145
- Where were you even going?
- The beach?

957
01:00:48,228 --> 01:00:49,855
[both laughing]

958
01:00:49,938 --> 01:00:51,731
I don't even know.

959
01:00:51,815 --> 01:00:54,651
But there I am,
just jogging down Wilshire Boulevard.

960
01:00:55,861 --> 01:00:57,988
I'm a full-on crazy person,

961
01:00:58,071 --> 01:01:02,367
and I'm jogging at the light...
when my mom drives up.

962
01:01:02,450 --> 01:01:05,871
- She was on the way to the hospital.
- Oh, my God.

963
01:01:05,954 --> 01:01:06,955
You don't like it?

964
01:01:08,373 --> 01:01:09,374
[laughing]

965
01:01:11,001 --> 01:01:13,128
No, I do. It's just, um...

966
01:01:13,211 --> 01:01:17,215
She... She just gets a bit nauseous
because of, um...

967
01:01:18,633 --> 01:01:20,385
the chemo.

968
01:01:20,468 --> 01:01:24,181
But it tastes really good.
The beer really helps.

969
01:01:25,557 --> 01:01:29,436
- I'll get you another one, no charge.
- Thank you very much.

970
01:01:31,813 --> 01:01:34,274
- Yes.
- Oh, my God.

971
01:01:34,357 --> 01:01:36,985
- No charge.
- Oh, my God, we're going to hell.

972
01:01:37,068 --> 01:01:38,862
Yeah. [laughs]

973
01:01:38,945 --> 01:01:40,447
[laughs]

974
01:01:42,449 --> 01:01:46,578
- Did he try to kiss you?
- Ew! Does he even like girls?

975
01:01:46,661 --> 01:01:47,996
No.

976
01:01:50,290 --> 01:01:51,875
I don't know.

977
01:01:53,585 --> 01:01:55,879
[giggling]

978
01:01:59,424 --> 01:02:01,468
[girl] What I'm trying to say is,

979
01:02:01,551 --> 01:02:04,679
why does she get to leave the house
when she's only level two?

980
01:02:04,763 --> 01:02:07,766
- It was Luke's night out.
- Yeah, but Ellen got to go.

981
01:02:07,849 --> 01:02:08,975
It's "Eli" now.

982
01:02:11,144 --> 01:02:14,144
It might make you feel better to know
that Dr. Beck scheduled a special trip

983
01:02:14,189 --> 01:02:15,941
for you guys in a couple of days.

984
01:02:16,024 --> 01:02:18,735
- Tell me it's not the Holocaust Museum.
- No.

985
01:02:18,818 --> 01:02:22,697
My mother took me there to make me
feel shitty, you know, about starving.

986
01:02:26,493 --> 01:02:27,827
It's okay. We're Jewish.

987
01:02:35,043 --> 01:02:38,296
Damn, Dr. Beck.
Are you trying to turn me straight?

988
01:02:38,380 --> 01:02:39,589
[wolf whistles]

989
01:02:39,673 --> 01:02:41,258
That's a different program.

990
01:02:41,341 --> 01:02:43,426
- Hi, everyone.
- Hey!

991
01:02:43,510 --> 01:02:47,305
Okay, so this place we're going, I had
to pull some strings to get us in there,

992
01:02:47,389 --> 01:02:48,848
so you have to behave.

993
01:02:48,932 --> 01:02:50,517
Tell us. I can't stand it.

994
01:02:51,643 --> 01:02:52,811
Tell us!

995
01:02:52,894 --> 01:02:54,813
[all chant] Tell us! Tell us!

996
01:02:54,896 --> 01:02:57,148
Tell us! Tell us! Tell us!

997
01:02:57,232 --> 01:02:59,234
[water running]

998
01:03:00,819 --> 01:03:02,112
I don't like this.

999
01:03:02,195 --> 01:03:05,657
I'm definitely getting a Holocaust vibe,
doc.

1000
01:03:05,740 --> 01:03:09,286
- It's okay, I promise.
- I don't believe you.

1001
01:03:23,466 --> 01:03:24,801
What is it?

1002
01:03:27,554 --> 01:03:28,596
Art.

1003
01:03:36,062 --> 01:03:38,565
Somebody tell me why we're here!

1004
01:03:44,863 --> 01:03:46,114
Because we're alive.

1005
01:03:47,699 --> 01:03:49,743
- ["Water" playing]
- Very good.

1006
01:03:49,826 --> 01:03:56,249
? Water leave
Through the valleys you wore down ?

1007
01:03:56,333 --> 01:03:58,335
? Wear me down ?

1008
01:04:01,921 --> 01:04:04,341
? Drown me in the water ?

1009
01:04:05,550 --> 01:04:07,552
? Drown me in the sea ?

1010
01:04:09,095 --> 01:04:12,474
? Lose me in the dark
Drag me to the deep ?

1011
01:04:12,557 --> 01:04:16,478
? Let your water wash over me ?

1012
01:04:23,735 --> 01:04:26,363
? Water ?

1013
01:04:27,489 --> 01:04:30,241
? Water rise ?

1014
01:04:31,910 --> 01:04:34,162
? Find a woman ?

1015
01:04:34,245 --> 01:04:38,750
? And dance through the moon's light ?

1016
01:04:38,833 --> 01:04:40,752
? Leave me the rain ?

1017
01:04:40,835 --> 01:04:43,963
? Drown me in the water ?

1018
01:04:44,047 --> 01:04:46,257
? Drown me in the sea ?

1019
01:04:47,759 --> 01:04:51,137
? Lose me in the dark
Drag me to the deep ?

1020
01:04:51,221 --> 01:04:54,557
? Let your water wash over me ?

1021
01:04:54,641 --> 01:04:56,810
? Wash ?

1022
01:04:58,353 --> 01:04:59,854
? Wash ?

1023
01:05:01,773 --> 01:05:03,733
? Wash ?

1024
01:05:23,795 --> 01:05:26,548
? Drown me in your water ?

1025
01:05:26,631 --> 01:05:28,925
? Drown me in the water ?

1026
01:05:30,051 --> 01:05:31,594
? Drown me in the sea ?

1027
01:05:33,721 --> 01:05:36,015
? Drown me in the water ?

1028
01:05:37,392 --> 01:05:39,644
? Drown me in the sea ?

1029
01:05:40,812 --> 01:05:43,022
? Drown me in the water ?

1030
01:05:44,149 --> 01:05:46,276
? Drown me in the sea ?

1031
01:05:49,779 --> 01:05:51,573
Here you go.

1032
01:05:51,656 --> 01:05:53,199
You're shaking like a chihuahua.

1033
01:06:15,430 --> 01:06:16,890
I know what you're trying to do.

1034
01:06:19,225 --> 01:06:22,979
Life's beautiful and all that... shit.

1035
01:06:24,814 --> 01:06:26,983
And that upsets you because...?

1036
01:06:28,276 --> 01:06:29,736
[scoffs]

1037
01:06:29,819 --> 01:06:31,029
Because it is.

1038
01:06:34,365 --> 01:06:40,914
I mean, I... I know it can be,
but I... I can't stop.

1039
01:06:42,248 --> 01:06:48,546
And I don't even know why.
I just... I just can't.

1040
01:06:48,630 --> 01:06:54,177
Yeah, that's bullshit.
That voice that says you can't.

1041
01:06:54,260 --> 01:06:57,347
Every time you hear that voice,
I want you to tell it to fuck off.

1042
01:06:58,723 --> 01:07:03,353
- Fuck off, voice!
- [Luke] Yeah! Fuck off!

1043
01:07:03,436 --> 01:07:05,772
- [Anna] Fuck you, voice!
- [Kendra] Fuck you, voice!

1044
01:07:05,855 --> 01:07:07,607
- Fuck you, voice!
- Fuck off!

1045
01:07:08,733 --> 01:07:10,360
Fuck!

1046
01:07:10,443 --> 01:07:13,321
- [applause]
- [Luke] Yeah! Whoo!

1047
01:07:13,404 --> 01:07:14,739
[Anna] Yeah! Yeah!

1048
01:07:14,822 --> 01:07:16,199
Fuck off.

1049
01:07:16,282 --> 01:07:19,285
[all shouting]

1050
01:07:27,252 --> 01:07:30,004
- That's what they always say.
- I know.

1051
01:07:30,088 --> 01:07:32,215
- What are you... ooh!
- I'll go blueberry.

1052
01:07:32,298 --> 01:07:33,424
I didn't say...

1053
01:07:33,508 --> 01:07:34,508
[laughs]

1054
01:08:11,546 --> 01:08:13,548
Try not to look too pleased
with yourself.

1055
01:08:13,631 --> 01:08:15,633
[laughs]

1056
01:08:22,390 --> 01:08:25,602
- [Luke] Mm-hmm.
- [laughter]

1057
01:08:25,685 --> 01:08:27,353
"Cassidy." That's her name.

1058
01:08:30,356 --> 01:08:32,150
Um...

1059
01:08:32,233 --> 01:08:37,155
It's a girl, and today
she is 12 weeks and one day old.

1060
01:08:37,238 --> 01:08:39,949
- [gasps] Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God.

1061
01:08:43,036 --> 01:08:45,705
Can we have the baby shower now?

1062
01:08:45,788 --> 01:08:50,418
[sighs] Yes, but I...
Just don't be a spaz about it, okay?

1063
01:08:50,501 --> 01:08:52,211
- [Pearl] Okay. Sorry.
- Don't go...

1064
01:08:52,295 --> 01:08:54,297
She's gonna have ponies everywhere.

1065
01:08:54,380 --> 01:08:55,548
Ta-da!

1066
01:08:55,632 --> 01:08:57,634
- [all cheer]
- [Luke] Oh, yeah.

1067
01:08:57,717 --> 01:08:58,760
Amazing.

1068
01:09:03,181 --> 01:09:05,475
I mean, that's one sassy unicorn.

1069
01:09:06,517 --> 01:09:08,061
I can't believe you drew that for her.

1070
01:09:09,896 --> 01:09:11,981
- You're welcome.
- It's awesome.

1071
01:09:13,358 --> 01:09:16,361
Um, I love you guys and thank you.

1072
01:09:16,444 --> 01:09:17,820
[all] Cheers.

1073
01:09:17,904 --> 01:09:20,865
[all chatter, laugh]

1074
01:09:38,424 --> 01:09:39,342
Whee!

1075
01:09:39,425 --> 01:09:40,718
[laughs]

1076
01:09:40,802 --> 01:09:42,512
- It's so crazy.
- It's so high.

1077
01:09:42,595 --> 01:09:44,389
- I'm actually quite terrified.
- Oh, my God.

1078
01:09:44,472 --> 01:09:46,224
- Fifty feet up.
- Here we go.

1079
01:09:46,307 --> 01:09:49,268
Whoa. Whoa! [laughs]

1080
01:09:49,352 --> 01:09:53,272
- All right, now it's your turn.
- No, I'd better not.

1081
01:09:53,356 --> 01:09:56,109
- Fucking knee.
- That knee.

1082
01:09:59,195 --> 01:10:00,238
Yup.

1083
01:10:15,002 --> 01:10:16,003
Sorry.

1084
01:10:19,006 --> 01:10:21,217
Did somebody bad touch you
as a kid or something?

1085
01:10:22,677 --> 01:10:25,221
- It's a big rexie thing.
- No.

1086
01:10:26,973 --> 01:10:28,641
Not really.

1087
01:10:28,725 --> 01:10:31,894
Hmm. Let's talk about that "really."

1088
01:10:35,648 --> 01:10:36,899
Just normal shit.

1089
01:10:39,402 --> 01:10:42,488
The second you get boobs,
it's like open season.

1090
01:10:44,240 --> 01:10:48,119
You guys are pretty disgusting that way.

1091
01:10:48,202 --> 01:10:50,788
We could at least
have some manners about it.

1092
01:10:50,872 --> 01:10:53,583
Not rub up against you guys
on the bus.

1093
01:10:53,666 --> 01:10:55,251
Oh, bus rubbing.

1094
01:10:56,627 --> 01:11:02,425
Titty grabbing... gross dirty talk...
night stalking...

1095
01:11:02,508 --> 01:11:06,137
You're all basically just a bunch
of portable holes for men to fuck.

1096
01:11:07,430 --> 01:11:09,140
Hmm.

1097
01:11:09,223 --> 01:11:11,726
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

1098
01:11:11,809 --> 01:11:14,979
So... have you... done it?

1099
01:11:15,980 --> 01:11:19,275
Or... was it just too appalling?

1100
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:24,781
Entirely too appalling.

1101
01:11:27,116 --> 01:11:28,534
Ever had an orgasm?

1102
01:11:28,618 --> 01:11:30,077
[laughs]

1103
01:11:30,161 --> 01:11:32,330
- Um... God!
- Sorry.

1104
01:11:32,413 --> 01:11:35,249
- You don't have to answer that.
- Personal.

1105
01:11:35,333 --> 01:11:39,837
It's different for guys, you know.
It's... It's very different.

1106
01:11:39,921 --> 01:11:42,882
There it is... bobbing at you.

1107
01:11:42,965 --> 01:11:44,133
[laughs]

1108
01:11:44,217 --> 01:11:48,346
Just bobbing,
begging to be manhandled.

1109
01:11:48,429 --> 01:11:49,931
[groans]

1110
01:11:50,014 --> 01:11:52,225
That's... That's way too much information.

1111
01:11:52,308 --> 01:11:55,561
Not right now, but it could be.

1112
01:11:57,063 --> 01:11:58,439
I just...

1113
01:11:58,523 --> 01:12:00,191
- Okay.
- I...

1114
01:12:01,609 --> 01:12:04,737
I need to do my research. And you...

1115
01:12:07,198 --> 01:12:11,828
need to be touched by someone
who actually cares about you.

1116
01:12:14,163 --> 01:12:15,163
Luke...

1117
01:12:39,897 --> 01:12:41,357
I'm falling in love with you.

1118
01:12:43,442 --> 01:12:47,530
- God! Luke, really? I...
- I'm sorry.

1119
01:12:47,613 --> 01:12:50,950
- No, sorry, it's just...
- No, you're right.

1120
01:12:51,033 --> 01:12:53,786
It'll be like slapping
two bags of bones together anyway.

1121
01:12:55,288 --> 01:12:58,541
- We should go back inside.
- Hey! What the fuck?

1122
01:12:59,876 --> 01:13:01,752
What the fuck what?

1123
01:13:01,836 --> 01:13:04,547
Suddenly, you decide
this is a physical thing,

1124
01:13:04,630 --> 01:13:06,632
and I'm caught by surprise,

1125
01:13:06,716 --> 01:13:09,927
and now you're just gonna go pout
and make this my fault?

1126
01:13:10,011 --> 01:13:12,722
All right, I'm sorry.
Obviously, it was a bad idea.

1127
01:13:12,805 --> 01:13:16,809
I just thought, if you knew
I wanted it to be good or different...

1128
01:13:16,893 --> 01:13:18,895
And you're falling in love with me?

1129
01:13:18,978 --> 01:13:22,565
Okay, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to unleash the Kraken.

1130
01:13:22,648 --> 01:13:26,819
- I've known you for, like, three weeks.
- Well, I've known you for two years.

1131
01:13:26,903 --> 01:13:29,363
Your drawing,
the way you see things...

1132
01:13:29,447 --> 01:13:32,658
Yeah? Oh, okay.

1133
01:13:32,742 --> 01:13:38,664
This rexie girl, who saw my stuff
on Tumblr, liked the way I saw... so much,

1134
01:13:38,748 --> 01:13:43,044
that when she slit her wrists,
she left me the fucking note.

1135
01:13:44,795 --> 01:13:46,422
And you know what her parents did?

1136
01:13:47,882 --> 01:13:52,511
They sent me pictures...
so I'd really know what I'd done.

1137
01:13:57,016 --> 01:13:58,768
People say they love you...

1138
01:14:00,144 --> 01:14:01,187
but what they mean is,

1139
01:14:01,270 --> 01:14:05,900
they love how loving you
makes them feel about themselves.

1140
01:14:05,983 --> 01:14:11,072
Or... [sniffles] Or they love
what they can take from you.

1141
01:14:11,155 --> 01:14:14,867
I don't even know where to start
with that. That's all kinds of wrong.

1142
01:14:16,452 --> 01:14:17,495
I'm done.

1143
01:14:18,496 --> 01:14:23,125
Okay, all right, you win!
All right? You're the queen of darkness.

1144
01:14:24,460 --> 01:14:25,878
Hey, come on!

1145
01:14:36,847 --> 01:14:39,225
[panting]

1146
01:14:39,308 --> 01:14:41,769
[grunting]

1147
01:14:51,612 --> 01:14:53,739
[Megan cries out]

1148
01:14:53,823 --> 01:14:55,908
[Megan screaming]

1149
01:14:58,202 --> 01:15:00,538
- Megan!
- Megan?

1150
01:15:00,621 --> 01:15:03,082
Megan! Megan, it's Luke! Let me in!

1151
01:15:04,792 --> 01:15:06,460
- [Lobo grunts]
- [keys rattle]

1152
01:15:06,544 --> 01:15:09,463
[Megan wails]

1153
01:15:17,388 --> 01:15:20,391
[Megan sobs] I thought I was safe.

1154
01:15:21,726 --> 01:15:23,602
[Lobo] I know, I know.

1155
01:15:25,730 --> 01:15:27,481
It's gonna be okay.

1156
01:15:27,565 --> 01:15:29,900
[Megan sobs]

1157
01:15:29,984 --> 01:15:31,235
[Lobo] I know. I'm sorry.

1158
01:15:32,778 --> 01:15:34,989
Guys, go back to bed.

1159
01:15:35,072 --> 01:15:37,116
[Megan screams]

1160
01:15:53,090 --> 01:15:55,384
Can you push a baby out
by throwing up too hard?

1161
01:15:57,011 --> 01:16:01,807
Yeah, that's exactly how it happens.
Don't be an idiot.

1162
01:16:05,352 --> 01:16:06,937
Good morning.

1163
01:16:07,021 --> 01:16:08,314
- Good morning.
- Hi.

1164
01:16:10,691 --> 01:16:11,984
How's Megan?

1165
01:16:12,068 --> 01:16:17,490
[sighs] She's at the hospital.
She's fine now, physically.

1166
01:16:19,992 --> 01:16:22,411
She's not sure she wants
to come back here...

1167
01:16:23,871 --> 01:16:25,081
which I understand.

1168
01:16:26,457 --> 01:16:27,666
Can we visit her?

1169
01:16:29,168 --> 01:16:33,005
Not yet, but I think, in a few days,
that's exactly what she needs.

1170
01:16:33,089 --> 01:16:34,089
I wanna go home.

1171
01:16:36,050 --> 01:16:37,134
I bet you do.

1172
01:16:39,136 --> 01:16:45,017
Listen. Bad things are going to happen.
That's not negotiable.

1173
01:16:46,268 --> 01:16:48,854
What is, is how you deal with it.

1174
01:16:56,112 --> 01:16:57,113
Would you read this?

1175
01:16:58,531 --> 01:17:00,366
- Do I have to?
- No.

1176
01:17:02,201 --> 01:17:03,202
Okay.

1177
01:17:13,587 --> 01:17:16,048
'"Courage' by Anne Sexton.

1178
01:17:19,176 --> 01:17:22,221
It is in the small things that we see it.

1179
01:17:22,304 --> 01:17:27,059
The child's first step,
as awesome as an earthquake.

1180
01:17:27,143 --> 01:17:31,272
The first time you rode a bike,
wallowing up the sidewalk.

1181
01:17:31,355 --> 01:17:35,860
The first spanking, when your heart
went on a journey all alone.

1182
01:17:35,943 --> 01:17:40,906
When they called you 'crybaby'
or 'poor' or 'fatty' or 'crazy'...

1183
01:17:40,990 --> 01:17:43,242
and made you into an alien...

1184
01:17:43,325 --> 01:17:45,744
you drank their acid
and you concealed it."

1185
01:17:50,457 --> 01:17:55,421
[clears throat] "Later, if you faced
the death of bombs and bullets...

1186
01:17:56,422 --> 01:17:58,716
you did not do it with a banner.

1187
01:17:58,799 --> 01:18:01,802
You did it with only a hat
to cover your heart.

1188
01:18:02,970 --> 01:18:06,599
You did not fondle the weakness inside you
though it was there.

1189
01:18:09,727 --> 01:18:12,980
Your courage was a small coal
that you kept swallowing."

1190
01:18:18,402 --> 01:18:19,402
[sighs]

1191
01:18:22,531 --> 01:18:24,325
So, Megan did decide to go home.

1192
01:18:29,914 --> 01:18:31,665
Anybody wanna talk about that?

1193
01:18:35,586 --> 01:18:38,547
It's her fault. She was purging.

1194
01:18:41,050 --> 01:18:45,471
I think Megan wanted her baby.
I really think she did.

1195
01:18:45,554 --> 01:18:49,725
- We shouldn't have had the shower.
- No, I don't think it was that.

1196
01:18:53,771 --> 01:18:55,147
Eli, you and Luke found her.

1197
01:18:57,733 --> 01:18:58,984
That must have been hard.

1198
01:19:02,154 --> 01:19:03,989
That baby was never gonna make it.

1199
01:19:07,409 --> 01:19:11,413
- Where is Luke, anyway?
- He's at the doctor for his knee.

1200
01:19:15,668 --> 01:19:16,669
Eli?

1201
01:19:19,505 --> 01:19:20,631
Eli.

1202
01:19:22,967 --> 01:19:24,426
[Beckham] What's going on with you?

1203
01:19:25,678 --> 01:19:26,762
Nothing.

1204
01:19:27,972 --> 01:19:31,183
Lobo tells me you're about a day away
from getting the tube.

1205
01:19:32,643 --> 01:19:33,811
You've been making progress,

1206
01:19:33,894 --> 01:19:36,855
but you can't stay at Threshold
if you drop any more weight.

1207
01:19:40,025 --> 01:19:43,195
I just think it's so weird
that you know everything about me...

1208
01:19:44,488 --> 01:19:46,198
and I don't know anything about you.

1209
01:19:48,117 --> 01:19:51,120
Okay, what do you wanna know?

1210
01:19:52,538 --> 01:19:54,415
- Do you have a wife?
- No.

1211
01:19:55,541 --> 01:19:58,961
- Do you have kids?
- No.

1212
01:19:59,044 --> 01:20:01,547
So, what's your damage?

1213
01:20:01,630 --> 01:20:03,882
Short version, my work.

1214
01:20:05,092 --> 01:20:09,930
It takes up all my time,
and I... I like it that way.

1215
01:20:11,765 --> 01:20:14,601
Women generally wanna spend time
with somebody they date.

1216
01:20:15,686 --> 01:20:18,105
Sounds like
you're avoiding intimacy, doctor.

1217
01:20:19,231 --> 01:20:20,316
[laughs]

1218
01:20:21,358 --> 01:20:23,277
Yeah, I guess it does.

1219
01:20:26,697 --> 01:20:30,492
Lobo also tells me
that you and Luke aren't speaking.

1220
01:20:30,576 --> 01:20:32,995
It seemed like you and Luke
had something good going.

1221
01:20:33,078 --> 01:20:35,706
Whatever. He's totally gay.

1222
01:20:35,789 --> 01:20:39,335
That would be easier, right?
Then you could write him off.

1223
01:20:41,045 --> 01:20:44,089
- Does he talk to you about me?
- You know I can't answer that.

1224
01:20:52,514 --> 01:20:55,893
- I just don't see the point.
- In what?

1225
01:20:59,646 --> 01:21:00,773
[Beckham sighs]

1226
01:21:04,109 --> 01:21:05,611
There is no point.

1227
01:21:07,071 --> 01:21:10,407
Or at least, big picture,
we don't get to know what it is.

1228
01:21:10,491 --> 01:21:15,037
Why we live, why Megan lost the baby,
why that girl killed herself.

1229
01:21:15,120 --> 01:21:18,499
- You're not reassuring me, doctor.
- I can't reassure you.

1230
01:21:19,541 --> 01:21:22,920
This idea you have
that there's a way to be safe...

1231
01:21:23,003 --> 01:21:24,880
it's childish and cowardly.

1232
01:21:26,006 --> 01:21:29,802
It stops you from experiencing anything,
including anything good.

1233
01:21:29,885 --> 01:21:31,845
You don't think I feel bad enough already?

1234
01:21:33,138 --> 01:21:34,723
I know I'm messed up...

1235
01:21:36,225 --> 01:21:39,561
but you're supposed to teach me
how not to be.

1236
01:21:39,645 --> 01:21:41,814
You know how.

1237
01:21:41,897 --> 01:21:46,819
Stop waiting for life to be easy.
Stop hoping for somebody to save you.

1238
01:21:46,902 --> 01:21:49,863
You don't need
another person lying to you.

1239
01:21:49,947 --> 01:21:51,949
Things don't all add up.

1240
01:21:53,242 --> 01:21:55,786
But you're resilient.

1241
01:21:55,869 --> 01:22:00,124
Face some hard facts
and you could have an incredible life.

1242
01:22:02,709 --> 01:22:04,336
That's your pearl of wisdom?

1243
01:22:06,547 --> 01:22:08,048
Grow a pair?

1244
01:22:09,550 --> 01:22:13,679
That's a more concise way
of putting it. Yeah.

1245
01:22:17,057 --> 01:22:18,183
Unbelievable.

1246
01:22:19,893 --> 01:22:21,395
[scoffs] Fuck you.

1247
01:22:25,858 --> 01:22:29,445
- What's going on?
- Beck's messed up, you know that?

1248
01:22:29,528 --> 01:22:33,115
We all buy the hype,
but nobody here is getting any better.

1249
01:22:33,198 --> 01:22:36,910
- That's not true.
- Yeah? Megan's screwed.

1250
01:22:36,994 --> 01:22:39,663
Anna has a treasure chest of puke
under her bed.

1251
01:22:39,746 --> 01:22:42,166
You live in fucking Ponyland.

1252
01:22:42,249 --> 01:22:45,377
I'm about to get the tube,
and he doesn't even care.

1253
01:22:49,923 --> 01:22:50,966
Shit.

1254
01:22:52,176 --> 01:22:58,557
I need another surgery. That's it for me
and the illustrious Jersey Ballet.

1255
01:22:58,640 --> 01:22:59,850
Seriously?

1256
01:23:02,019 --> 01:23:06,190
Yeah. Come on, put your bag down.
Let's go get another cancer beer.

1257
01:23:06,273 --> 01:23:08,692
I can't. Sorry. I'm actually out of here.

1258
01:23:08,775 --> 01:23:10,152
Did you hear what I said?

1259
01:23:11,695 --> 01:23:15,157
I'm finished. And you're leaving?

1260
01:23:18,035 --> 01:23:19,995
I can't.

1261
01:23:20,078 --> 01:23:23,040
What, you think I didn't guess
my knee was fucked?

1262
01:23:24,333 --> 01:23:27,669
And now that I'm done
doing the one thing that makes me feel,

1263
01:23:27,753 --> 01:23:29,004
you're my next thing.

1264
01:23:31,381 --> 01:23:33,759
[scoffs]

1265
01:23:33,842 --> 01:23:38,388
I know that that's not a plan.
It's not a good one, anyway.

1266
01:23:40,432 --> 01:23:43,560
But I need you... Eli.

1267
01:23:57,199 --> 01:23:59,701
[door opens, closes]

1268
01:23:59,785 --> 01:24:01,954
Okay. Thank you. Bye.

1269
01:24:03,372 --> 01:24:04,456
- Thank you.
- Sure.

1270
01:24:12,339 --> 01:24:13,924
[grunts]

1271
01:24:23,058 --> 01:24:24,309
[Beckham] There is no point.

1272
01:24:25,602 --> 01:24:27,312
That girl killed herself.

1273
01:24:29,356 --> 01:24:30,899
You look like a ghost.

1274
01:24:33,235 --> 01:24:34,444
[Kelly] If you die...

1275
01:24:36,196 --> 01:24:38,073
I will kill you.

1276
01:24:38,156 --> 01:24:39,199
[woman] You okay, honey?

1277
01:24:40,617 --> 01:24:44,288
I... I just got up too fast. Sorry.

1278
01:24:45,831 --> 01:24:47,207
You need to eat, girl.

1279
01:24:47,291 --> 01:24:52,504
I'm fine. But thank you.
I just need to get home.

1280
01:25:38,467 --> 01:25:39,801
What kind of place is this,

1281
01:25:39,885 --> 01:25:42,721
where your patients can just walk off
like that and nobody stops her?

1282
01:25:42,804 --> 01:25:45,932
The problem with treatment
for some of these kids...

1283
01:25:46,016 --> 01:25:48,143
is that we won't let them hit bottom.

1284
01:25:48,226 --> 01:25:52,773
It's too hard to watch.
But for Eli, the bottom is critical.

1285
01:26:06,828 --> 01:26:11,291
How is there even less of you?
What did that doctor do to you?

1286
01:26:11,375 --> 01:26:12,376
Hi, Mom.

1287
01:26:13,377 --> 01:26:15,837
- Is this all you've got?
- Yeah.

1288
01:26:15,921 --> 01:26:18,715
All right.
Well, everybody's waiting for you.

1289
01:26:18,799 --> 01:26:22,344
- "Everybody"?
- Horses. They're very sweet beasts.

1290
01:26:23,845 --> 01:26:25,263
[horse snorts]

1291
01:26:26,306 --> 01:26:29,184
Olive and I were worried that it wasn't
gonna work out with that doctor.

1292
01:26:29,267 --> 01:26:31,812
- Well, he had such an attitude.
- Oh, God complex.

1293
01:26:31,895 --> 01:26:33,855
- Totally dismissive.
- And Susan...

1294
01:26:33,939 --> 01:26:38,193
- I mean, he really let her attack us.
- He just wanted everybody to be honest.

1295
01:26:38,276 --> 01:26:39,587
I don't like to speak negatively,

1296
01:26:39,611 --> 01:26:42,114
but that woman's never said an honest word
in her life.

1297
01:26:42,197 --> 01:26:44,258
Of course, your father doesn't go home.
Can you imagine?

1298
01:26:44,282 --> 01:26:46,618
She fought really hard to get me
into Threshold House.

1299
01:26:46,702 --> 01:26:48,245
Yeah, look how well that turned out.

1300
01:26:49,329 --> 01:26:52,749
And how about the way she talked
about your mother's breakdowns?

1301
01:26:52,833 --> 01:26:56,753
They were transformational for me.
Everybody should have more breakdowns.

1302
01:26:59,506 --> 01:27:01,666
You didn't feel that way about them
when they happened.

1303
01:27:08,014 --> 01:27:11,810
Dr. Beckham called here earlier.
He thought you might turn up.

1304
01:27:11,893 --> 01:27:15,564
- He did? What did you say?
- Well, that you'd decided to leave.

1305
01:27:15,647 --> 01:27:18,567
He wanted to make sure you were okay.

1306
01:27:18,650 --> 01:27:21,945
A boy wanted to speak with you. Luke?

1307
01:27:22,028 --> 01:27:25,240
[sighs]

1308
01:27:25,323 --> 01:27:29,035
Is this somebody special?

1309
01:27:29,119 --> 01:27:30,495
I don't know. He...

1310
01:27:31,496 --> 01:27:34,624
He's my friend, kind of...

1311
01:27:36,042 --> 01:27:37,669
It all got fucked up.

1312
01:27:45,927 --> 01:27:49,097
In the morning,
Olive would like you to work with Freya.

1313
01:27:51,600 --> 01:27:52,642
The horse?

1314
01:27:53,685 --> 01:27:56,605
Olive has grown tremendously out here.
You'll thank me.

1315
01:27:56,688 --> 01:28:00,525
But isn't that kind of like a conflict?
Her giving me therapy?

1316
01:28:00,609 --> 01:28:05,447
Freya does all the work.
I'm just a conduit.

1317
01:28:05,530 --> 01:28:07,699
- Oh.
- Yeah, she's just a conduit.

1318
01:28:08,742 --> 01:28:13,789
There's no electricity, but I think...
It's not so cold. You'll be okay.

1319
01:28:15,123 --> 01:28:18,585
- You're gonna sleep, anyway.
- Yeah, I'm tired.

1320
01:28:18,668 --> 01:28:22,964
There's a bedpan here.
So, if you need it...

1321
01:28:23,048 --> 01:28:25,467
It's better than stumbling around
in the dark.

1322
01:28:25,550 --> 01:28:26,593
Okay.

1323
01:28:27,677 --> 01:28:32,057
- People pay money to stay here?
- It's rustic. They love it.

1324
01:28:45,946 --> 01:28:48,198
- Ellen...
- "Eli."

1325
01:28:48,281 --> 01:28:51,618
You know, "Ellen" was
your great-grandmother's name.

1326
01:28:51,701 --> 01:28:53,328
I bet she didn't like it either.

1327
01:28:56,832 --> 01:29:02,128
You know, I... had a premonition
before you came.

1328
01:29:02,212 --> 01:29:05,924
- Really?
- You were a baby.

1329
01:29:06,007 --> 01:29:09,094
I didn't hold you enough.
I didn't bond with you.

1330
01:29:10,554 --> 01:29:14,349
And, of course, that's true.
I didn't know about postpartum depression.

1331
01:29:15,684 --> 01:29:19,104
- I don't think that's it.
- Well, anyway...

1332
01:29:22,691 --> 01:29:26,486
I spoke to Jean Williamson about it.
Do you remember her?

1333
01:29:26,570 --> 01:29:30,824
- The pastor?
- No, she wrote The Pure Way of Light.

1334
01:29:30,907 --> 01:29:33,326
She's very interested in Olive's work

1335
01:29:33,410 --> 01:29:38,957
and has been... a great comfort to me
around your illness.

1336
01:29:39,040 --> 01:29:40,041
And she...

1337
01:29:41,751 --> 01:29:46,506
feels that it would be healing
for the both of us

1338
01:29:46,590 --> 01:29:50,510
if you allowed me to feed you.

1339
01:30:00,979 --> 01:30:05,442
- It's rice milk. I made it myself.
- Like a baby?

1340
01:30:06,610 --> 01:30:09,237
Well, like a mother and a child.

1341
01:30:10,530 --> 01:30:15,660
I could hold you and rock you,
and you could go to sleep.

1342
01:30:17,454 --> 01:30:18,622
Uh, I don't know.

1343
01:30:20,081 --> 01:30:24,169
No, I know. I know it's odd.

1344
01:30:25,879 --> 01:30:26,879
But...

1345
01:30:27,714 --> 01:30:31,926
Well, as she said it, I felt real clarity
that that's what we need.

1346
01:30:34,304 --> 01:30:35,430
Can I think about it?

1347
01:30:38,308 --> 01:30:39,893
Yeah, okay.

1348
01:30:47,233 --> 01:30:48,233
There's, uh...

1349
01:30:49,986 --> 01:30:54,115
not much left of you to lose.
You know that?

1350
01:30:55,283 --> 01:30:58,119
- Dr. Beckham made that clear.
- I know.

1351
01:30:59,996 --> 01:31:01,539
Hmm.

1352
01:31:01,623 --> 01:31:05,085
He said it's your choice,
whether you come back or not.

1353
01:31:06,670 --> 01:31:10,674
But I could tell that he was afraid
that you're gonna die.

1354
01:31:12,842 --> 01:31:16,763
Ellen, my... my baby.

1355
01:31:16,846 --> 01:31:18,306
[voice breaks] I...

1356
01:31:18,390 --> 01:31:19,516
I know.

1357
01:31:20,809 --> 01:31:22,394
I'm sorry.

1358
01:31:24,688 --> 01:31:25,730
And...

1359
01:31:27,440 --> 01:31:29,317
I just want you to know that...

1360
01:31:31,152 --> 01:31:32,654
I accept it if...

1361
01:31:34,114 --> 01:31:36,741
If death is what you want,
I accept it now.

1362
01:31:39,160 --> 01:31:42,747
I accept it, but um... I love you.

1363
01:31:44,749 --> 01:31:46,751
I just... I can't keep fighting you.

1364
01:31:49,045 --> 01:31:50,088
All right.

1365
01:31:51,756 --> 01:31:52,799
Okay.

1366
01:31:54,634 --> 01:31:55,634
Mom?

1367
01:31:57,053 --> 01:31:58,053
Yeah?

1368
01:32:02,475 --> 01:32:03,852
Feed me, please.

1369
01:32:05,895 --> 01:32:06,980
Yeah.

1370
01:32:09,899 --> 01:32:10,942
Yeah.

1371
01:32:12,736 --> 01:32:13,778
Okay.

1372
01:32:17,699 --> 01:32:18,742
Okay.

1373
01:32:24,831 --> 01:32:27,834
Can you hold this? Hold on.

1374
01:32:29,919 --> 01:32:33,548
Okay. Do you mind if I put your feet down?

1375
01:32:34,799 --> 01:32:37,761
Okay. Are you comfortable?

1376
01:32:37,844 --> 01:32:40,597
- Okay.
- [sniffling]

1377
01:32:44,934 --> 01:32:46,811
- Yeah? Okay.
- Yeah.

1378
01:32:53,777 --> 01:32:55,528
[Ellen sobs]

1379
01:32:58,114 --> 01:33:00,492
? Hush little baby ?

1380
01:33:00,575 --> 01:33:02,285
- [sniffling]
- ? Don't say a word ?

1381
01:33:04,746 --> 01:33:08,917
? Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird ?

1382
01:33:10,001 --> 01:33:13,338
? And if that mockingbird don't sing ?

1383
01:33:16,132 --> 01:33:19,469
? Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring ?

1384
01:33:20,595 --> 01:33:25,433
? And if that diamond ring turns brass ?

1385
01:33:27,477 --> 01:33:30,605
? Mama's gonna buy you a looking glass ?

1386
01:35:05,533 --> 01:35:06,659
[groans]

1387
01:35:16,544 --> 01:35:17,962
[sighs]

1388
01:35:20,214 --> 01:35:21,257
Okay.

1389
01:35:37,982 --> 01:35:41,527
You need to get out of the sun.
You're frying.

1390
01:35:47,241 --> 01:35:48,576
There's a tree.

1391
01:36:00,296 --> 01:36:02,006
[Judy] I just want you to know that...

1392
01:36:03,800 --> 01:36:05,259
I accept it.

1393
01:36:06,386 --> 01:36:09,347
- [Ellen] I just don't see the point.
- [Beckham] There is no point.

1394
01:36:10,807 --> 01:36:12,447
[Kelly] Can you please
just try this time?

1395
01:36:16,562 --> 01:36:19,273
[Susan] Not too good. Not perfect.

1396
01:36:20,608 --> 01:36:22,777
[sighs] Pretty.

1397
01:36:25,363 --> 01:36:27,323
[voices whispering]

1398
01:36:29,200 --> 01:36:31,869
[Kelly] I don't get to have a sister.

1399
01:36:39,627 --> 01:36:42,839
You're dazzling. You know that?

1400
01:36:44,757 --> 01:36:45,842
I do not.

1401
01:37:19,500 --> 01:37:20,543
Shit.

1402
01:37:23,129 --> 01:37:24,172
Hey.

1403
01:37:25,590 --> 01:37:26,758
I need you to look.

1404
01:37:41,981 --> 01:37:43,983
Oh, my God. Is that me?

1405
01:37:53,201 --> 01:37:54,202
That's me.

1406
01:38:01,876 --> 01:38:05,630
Your courage is a small coal
that you keep swallowing.

1407
01:38:28,986 --> 01:38:30,530
[coughing]

1408
01:38:39,330 --> 01:38:40,330
[sighs]

1409
01:39:14,031 --> 01:39:15,116
[chuckles]

1410
01:39:19,871 --> 01:39:20,955
Not dead.

1411
01:39:21,038 --> 01:39:22,999
[breathes heavily]

1412
01:39:28,880 --> 01:39:31,924
["Follow The Sun" playing]

1413
01:39:51,027 --> 01:39:53,821
? Follow ?

1414
01:39:53,905 --> 01:39:57,742
? Follow the sun ?

1415
01:39:57,825 --> 01:40:01,746
? And which way the wind blows ?

1416
01:40:01,829 --> 01:40:04,498
? When this day is done ?

1417
01:40:06,918 --> 01:40:10,254
? And breathe ?

1418
01:40:10,338 --> 01:40:13,925
? Breathe in the air ?

1419
01:40:14,008 --> 01:40:17,970
? Cherish this moment ?

1420
01:40:18,054 --> 01:40:21,098
? Cherish this breath ?

1421
01:40:23,809 --> 01:40:24,936
I'm gonna be okay.

1422
01:40:29,398 --> 01:40:32,735
Whatever. You do this again,
I'm gonna punch you in the vagina.

1423
01:40:32,818 --> 01:40:34,237
[both laugh]

1424
01:40:45,331 --> 01:40:47,416
- You sure?
- Yeah.

1425
01:40:47,500 --> 01:40:48,500
Okay.

1426
01:40:50,544 --> 01:40:51,544
Okay.

1427
01:40:53,297 --> 01:40:56,467
? So follow ?

1428
01:40:56,550 --> 01:40:59,220
? Follow the sun ?

1429
01:41:00,346 --> 01:41:04,267
? And which way the wind blows ?

1430
01:41:04,350 --> 01:41:07,645
? When this day is done ?