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BallsOfFluff

Spaghetti

Mar 30th, 2012
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  1. >Digging through the kitchen cabinets
  2. >Find an old pasta maker
  3. >Haven't used this thing in years
  4. >Decide to give it a try tonight
  5. >Mix up the pasta dough using a recipe from the internet
  6. >Start rolling it into linguini
  7. >Your least favorite fluffy pony walks in to the kitchen
  8. >Must have gotten out of the safe room somehow
  9. >Sees you making the pasta with the machine
  10. >"Fwuffy wan sketties!" it cries
  11. >You tell it to wait, you have to cook it first
  12. >It won't leave you alone
  13. >It sees that you're paying more attention to the pasta than to it
  14. >"Fwuffy wan BE sketties!"
  15. >The last of the dough is rolled into linguini
  16. >"Is that so?" you ask it
  17. >"Fwuffy wan be sketties!"
  18. >Shrug.
  19. >You were thinking of getting a new fluffy anyway
  20. >You set the rollers to their widest setting and move the uncooked pasta to a different counter
  21. >Put down some newspaper under the machine and pick up fluffy
  22. >It's thrilled to get the attention
  23. >You tell it that if it wants to be spaghetti, it needs to put it's legs between the rollers
  24. >It gets up on the machine and sticks it's forelegs in
  25. >You turn the crank
  26. >Fluffy pony starts getting sucked into the rollers. It's eyes go wide with pain as the machine begins to tear its legs into thin, flat strips.
  27. >Its tiny bones begin to crack
  28. >The first bits of pony linguini are extruded from the other side of the machine
  29. >"Look, now you're spaghetti!" you tell it
  30. >It's bawling and babbling incoherently from the physical and emotional pain
  31. >You get bored once you grind past it's knees
  32. >Rip it out of the machine by the fluff on it's back, leaving it a pair of bloody stumps for front legs
  33. >Toss it into the trash
  34. >Place the machine in the sink for cleaning, begin cooking pasta
  35. >Mix the strips of gore into the other fluffies' bowls.
  36. >They don't seem to notice or mind.
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