Untitled, Chapter 3 (Hiatus)

>>34056952
>>34056955
>>34066867

(End of Chapter 2, Start of Chapter 3)

I slide a finger underneath the partially-glued flap and inspect its contents. A quick peek away from the envelope reveals everypony else has made distance between others, reading the contents in privacy. I turn my back and hold the cards close to my chest, staring down to read them.

The first card is my character's information. I have two names: 'Muddy Buck', my real name and an infamous art thief, and 'Buck Silver', my fake identity and an up-and-coming action star who's going to use this party to make connections. Sitting Pretty knows many directors, and Buck (Silver) is sure to get a job if he can impress Sitting Pretty. My inventory includes gloves, which prevents leaving behind evidence, a fake recreation of Water Fillies by Cloud Manet, and a trick pocket that holds the fake painting. Anything in this pocket can't be found unless I'm unconscious or dead.

My other items include a knife, locally sourced from none other than Sitting Pretty's kitchen and a card worth a hundred bits. The last card is marked Evidence - Rope Marks. So the murder strangles his victim. My primary goal is stealing Water Fillies. My secondary goal is to get Sitting Pretty to put in a good word to Quentin Tolfetano for me so I can make his production cel collection my next heist.

The last thing in the envelope is a self-adhesive name tag with 'Buck' on it in large print. I stick it on myself and adjust my trilby (fedora?), sliding my cards and mission into my pocket. My finger slides across an envelope, giving myself a wicked paper-cut. I say it even time, but I am glad this is a dream. The envelope was put there by Rarity, no doubt. I'll have to read it later.

Looking around me, I can see everypony else, beside Granny Smith, is wearing their name tags. They hide their cards in dresses, under hats, or behind ears. We stand around and stare at each other, nervous. How do we start?



"I'm delighted that everypony could make it here tonight!" Ah, Pinkie Pie starts. That's natural. Her unruly mane and tail clash with the dour gown Rarity made too hard. It's difficult not to laugh as she affects an upper Manehatten accent, as well, "Do make yourselves at home! Oh, but before we begin, I'd love to introduce the winner of the art competition, Golden Wheat."

She gestures to an empty seat beside herself, reading from a small booklet, "Golden Wheat is a nervous young colt that waves shyly at the introduction. High society is too much for him, so for the rest of the night he simply sits back and soaks up the conversation. He's a poor Earth pony from out near Dodge Junction, encouraged by his family to enter a sculpture competition ran by Sitting Pretty. His sculpture was of a feed trough with 'UPON OUR BACKS' across the bottom."

Pinkie tucks the booklet away, "Now, without further ado, let's have fun and make merry." She descends from the table and takes a proper seat, smiling patiently at all the ponies standing around awkwardly. She stares at me with a strained smile. I guess it's up to me to break the ice.

Now, how would a young actor approach Sitting Pretty? Who is Buck Silver? I frown. The longer I think about the problem, the deeper my paralysis will get. I walk with stiff shoulders and pull a chair out from the table with my heel, "So. You're, uh, Sitting Pretty. I can see why you..." My voice shrinks, "got... that name..." I feel like a fool. An utter, clueless fool. Why did I have to get the one that required me to act smooth? My face is burning up. Pinkie Pie interrupts my thoughts with a lascivious giggle, "And you look like a real 'Buck' to me. Have you gotten your hoof in the door yet?"

I think about my bio, about how I was supposed to get her to connect me with a director, then shake my head, "No, ma'am. Nopony's got it in their hearts to give me a fightin' chance. If they even have a heart to start with."



I glance around the room. Rarity turns to her neighbor, Apple Bloom, and puts a hand over her heart, "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, uhm..." she squints past the white hat and smiles, "Sheriff. What do you think of Golden's sculpture?" There's a bead of sweat on her brow as her cheeks flush. Rarity must be feeling as ridiculous as I am, but I have to admire her courage in helping to get the ball rolling.

Apple Bloom scratches her jaw, then reads her character bio over again. She nods, tucks it back under her hat, and lets out a big sigh, "Shucks, I ain't much fer art. I think everypony's entry was mighty fine."

Rainbow Dash interjects. Her badge reads 'Deputy'. "Oh, I really liked the, uhm, spirit of its message! Yeah...?"

Rarity frowns, "Really, now? My little Handsome's The Whinny in the Willows was the height of technical excellence. That brute from Dodge Junction couldn't even level out the legs!"

"Well, maybe them legs're s'posed to be all a-kilter like that? Somethin' like, what we got's good enough fer us, even if it don't look the prettiest." Apple Bloom starts getting into her role. The room is soon abuzz with imaginary conversations as the awkwardness melts off.

Pinkie P-Pretty, Sitting Pretty brings my attention back to her with a gentle rub of my shoulder, "Oh, that's just how the business goes these days. Don't beat yourself up over it. You'll find somepony willing to give you a chance." She smiles at me, leans close to my ear, and whispers "Thank you." before pulling back, her hoof still on my shoulder, "You know, I used to be an actress when I was your age. I might've had an easier time thanks to my good looks, but I wasn't just for show, you know. I won an award for best up-and-coming talent."

"Ah, I neve-" Wait, no, of course I did. I'm an actor, coming to a famous actress' social event, trying to get my foot in the door. Er, trying to steal art. Gah! "-errrr.... knew that Sleepless In The Saddle won any awards!"



That's an awful pun. I can see her trying not to lose control of her laughter. Without completely composing herself, Pinkie Pie continues the conversation between giggles, "I'm surprised you've seen it. Most know me from Hot to Trot. You're a fan, perhaps?" She dips her head, the veil and lilies hiding over half of her face. One bright, large, blue eye flutters its eyelashes at me.

"Not as big as I thought."

"Oh, I could help with that." I gulp. Is this in the script? She takes my hand in her hoof, looking around the crowded room, "Let's find someplace more quiet, shall we?" Most ponies were deep in their conversations. Rarity's somehow still arguing about art and how her colt should've won the art competition with Rainbow Dash. Apple Bloom is listening to Applejack talk about her character's history with Sitting Pretty.

"Now, I ain't saying she didn't have the right to back out, but at least have the courtesy to tell me, y'know?"

Apple Bloom nods, "Well, this Wheat feller is gonna be *her* talent, ain't he? Not the both o' yours if she was still with yer agency."

Applejack nods, "Water under the bridge now, though. There are plenty of other young'uns jus' waitin' to be discovered."

Big Mac is nowhere to be seen, and Granny Smith has gone to sleep. Pinkie Pie leads me away from the others, causing an audible gap in the conversation coming from Rarity. Our eyes meet as I'm pulled out of the room and up the stairs. Pinkie takes a seat at the top of the stairs and pulls me down next to her, snug. I make distance between us as I settle myself down. I'm thankful we're still in plain sight. "So, Buck, have you ever kissed a mare before?"

"What?"

She's looking me dead in the eyes, an ear swiveled to monitor the bottom of the stairs. "You said you wanted to know about all the little details, right? A colt as good-lookin' as you needs to know how to sell a kissing scene."



"I- uh, y-yeah, I guess you're right. But that's all jus- just acting, isn't it? The man covers her lips with his thumb?" She holds up her hoof. "Ah. Right, so it's all... real, then?"

Pinkie nods, "That's something they don't tell the new ones about. You need to be... flexible in this line of work. Be willing to make compromises. Understand to take what you can get, and not give it up for anyone."

"If that's what it takes to make it..." I pause. How can I lead this away from the obvious and towards the director? Better yet, getting her to take me to the painting... "But you've made it now. In fact, you had a short-lived career, isn't that right?"

She nods, leaning onto my shoulder, "It has to be your passion to make it. The long hours, re-shooting the same scene thirty times, meeting your heroes only to find out how unheroic they can be... but don't let me dissuade you from your calling!" Pinkie points her head up to look at me in the eyes, "Do you want to practice?"

"Huh?"

"I'll put a good word in for you if I feel that you have what it takes." A smile with a full blush. Secondary objective. Secondary. I can focus on the primary objective. Stealing art. Art, romance. Viewing paintings. Viewing paintings is romantic. Yeah, let's go with that.

"W-Well, but this is a bit sudden. I need to get in the m-mood first."

She giggles, "A method actor, hm? Well, then, Buck~" She fondles the B and lets her tongue roll out on the 'ck', "how do we get you in the mood?"

"Since I don't know you, we need to have a date first. And, lucky for us, we're in Manehatten's premier private art gallery." I support her as I stand, my heart ready to burst from my chest. My knees weaken and I'm not sure who's holding up who as her elbow locks with mine.

"You really know how to woo a mare~." Pinkie Pie walks on her hind-legs alongside me as we walk up the hallway. I just need the painting. Just the painting. Why are you nuzzling my arm. Pinkie, please.



We 'stop' in front of an art exhibit in Sitting Pretty's penthouse. It's a card hung by a tack into the wooden wall of Applejack's home. It shows a nondescript framed painting, but it's too small to tell what it really is. On the card reads Water Fillies. This is my target. All I need to do now is to somehow get Pinkie Pie off of my back for half a minute so I can make the switch, and I'm golden. No more of this borderline fraternizing required. "My, what a lovely piece of work. How did you come to acquire this stunning... painting?"

She returns to all fours, "There was a county auction of an estate, assumed by the Sheriff's department to be cleaned out beyond some unmovable furniture in the basement. Well, when lil' ol me started clearing it out, I happened across this hiding behind an old wardrobe. It was in good shape, but the years were unkind and had to go through an expensive restoration process. Oh, the look on the Sheriff's face when I told him!" Pinkie Pie covers her mouth, "Ah, but laughing at the misfortune of others is unladylike. Just poor luck on their part. If this went to auction, it would've covered their budget for a decade or more."

I nod and think to myself how I'm going to get her to leave. Keeping the conversation going works, and holy shit can she improvise, but I only have so long before the kiss comes in. I smack my lips, my tongue sticking to the roof of my mouth as cracked skin sticks and peels, taking with it a fresh layer and coating my mouth with a copper tang. "I could really go for some water."

"Oh, Buck, you should've said so sooner! Please, wait just a moment." Pinkie Pie trots to the stairs, swinging her tail and flank enough to defenestrate modesty. I look out the window, rain pattering against the glass. A low growl of thunder rumbles in the distance. It's the perfect time to swap the paintings.

As I reach for the card tacked on the wall, the power cuts out. Cries of confusion come from everywhere. Then, a scream.


>>34074002
>>34085223

(Continuing Untitled)

I freeze. I hear the clamor of hooves running around the house and rain dappling windows. Doors open and close. I can hear Apple Bloom call out, "Y'all alright?" Nobody responds, not even me. This must be a planned power outage, right? It's all part of the game. I finish swapping out the real painting for the fake and keep it with the hidden pocket card. I'll take my risks carrying a knife. I do plan on surviving until the end.

My eyes adjust to the darkness and I tread towards the stairs. Apple Bloom's voice comes from the bottom, "Now, listen here. Y'all ain't funny! Respond if yer alright!" I hold my breath and listen for anypony else to reply. This time, there's only rain. "Anypony? Please?"

"I'm fine, Sheriff. Couldn't hear you over the thunder." I slowly descend, cursing myself for not coming up with a better lie. I hear Apple Bloom step away from the stairs when I reach the bottom, "I hope the power comes on soon. I'd hate for this party to end on a sour note." I see the rough shape of her outline adjust her hat. She leans in close and whispers.

"Is this part of the game?"

I whisper back, "I think so. Do you know where the fuse box is?"

She nods, "It's down in the basement. Lemme grab a light and we'll go fix it ourselves." I wait by the landing as Apple Bloom rummages around in a closet beneath the stairs. "A-ha!" The glass of the lantern hanging in her mouth reflects the little light cast by a match she holds in her hooves. She takes the lead, and I open the basement door for her when we reach it.

"Weren't you with App- er, another guest? Where did they go?" The stairs creak as we descend. The shadows we cast dance over old wallpaper and dark wood, a smell of dust and burning oil mixing to make the ordeal unsettling.

"Oh, she said somethin' about havin' to use the little filly's room. An' before I know it, everypony else is gone, too. Figured I'd jus' get myself some water when the power went out."



"Huh. Well, I was with Sitting Pretty. Funny enough, I asked her for some water right before the power went out. Did you see her come into the kitchen?" And wasn't the only bathroom on the second floor with the bedrooms? Nopony came upstairs after Pinkie and I left the kitchen. That makes Applejack's character suspicious.

Apple Bloom shakes her head, casting the lantern's light over the basement. Past the storage shelves and covered furniture, the fuse box was mounted low on the wall. I'd have to crouch to be eye-level with it, making it the perfect height for ponies. The door is unlatched and hanging open, showing us that a fuse had been taken out. Apple Bloom sets the lantern on the ground and looks at the fuse, "Now, what in tarnation's this all about? Somepony went an' sabotaged the lights." She adjusts her hat, "There's somethin' fishy goin' on around here."

I could see Apple Bloom getting excited as the mystery thickened. Her tail swished back and forth, and she took out a card from beneath her hat. She holds it up to me, proud, "I got a forensics kit, so I can collect evidence. So we just gotta find Pinkie Pie and she'll give me the card for this here fuse box sabotage." I return her infectious smile with one of my own.

"Thank goodness we have you on the case, Sheriff. I'm sure whoever's up to this is gonna regret making an enemy out of you."

She tilts her hat, crossing one forehoof over the other, "Aw, shucks, it ain't nothin'. Jus' doin' my job." With that, she fixes up the fuse box and the lights return, coinciding with another rumble of thunder. "Now, let's get ourselves upstairs and sort this mess out!"

***

It didn't take long for us to round most of the ponies into the kitchen. Granny Smith, who had been asleep since before the power outage, is carried off to bed by Big Mac. Once he's back, we have everypony except Pinkie Pie seated at the table.



"Any of you catch sight of her?" They all shake their heads no in response. I think I know who the first murder victim is. I frown.

"Then let's form search parties!" Apple Bloom takes the lead. "Me & Buck'll go with my Deputy, and y'all can stick together," she points to Big Mac, Applejack, and Dash. "We'll come back here in ten minutes. Y'all will search the upper floors, and we'll take the lower ones."

Rainbow Dash frowns, "Uh, Sheriff, shouldn't we split up and make sure everypony's safe? I mean, we're both cops, so it'll be good in case one of us finds Pretty Pie dead."

Apple Bloom frowns, "Er, we shouldn't jump to conclusions on the status of Sitting Pretty's condition, but I guess you got a point." She taps her chin as she looks between Big Mac, Applejack, and Rarity.

Rarity raises her hoof, "I'm willing to trade spots with the Deputy, Sheriff. I'd feel *much* safer in your and Buck's capable hands." She winks at me.

I kneel down next to Apple Bloom and whisper, "I say we go with Applejack. We can ask her about what she was doing when she was gone for so long, and Rarity's eagerness is givin' me a bad feeling." That bad feeling may be unrelated to the game, but it might be the edge that convinces Apple Bloom.

She nods her head, "Y'know, Buck, yer right. We'll take App- We'll take Pace Spades with us. Deputy, yer with Gorgeous an' Butler Hill." Pace being Applejack, and Butler being Big Mac. Rarity's disappointment is immeasurable. Along with Pinkie Pie's successful efforts and keeping us separated, I'm sure she's just about had it.

Rainbow Dash slaps Gorgeous on the back as Applejack joins us on our side of the table, "You're gonna be fine, Gorgeous. Sheriff says I'll be her replacement when she retires here next week!" Dash puffs her chest out.

Gorgeous scowls. "I suppose I'll just have to make do with the Sheriff's assistant, then."

Apple Bloom cuts their argument short, "Now, we meet back here in fifteen minutes."



The second search party heads upstairs. Apple Bloom nods, "Alrighty then. Buck, Pace, let's keep an eye out for any funny business." She tilts her hat forward and struts around the table. Applejack and I exchange stifled laughter as we follow.

We clear the first floor room by room, finding nothing of interest as we go. I take the opportunity to start Pace's interrogation, "Say, Pace. The Sheriff tells me you were missing when the power went out. Where were you?"

"Oh, I had to excuse myself to the little filly's room. That cider'll run right through ya." She opens up a book on a small table and shakes it, looking for clues. We were searching through the living room. I was turning up cushions on the couch, and Apple Bloom's head was stuck under the rug, her hat on the floor beside her.

"That's funny, because Sitting Pretty and I were at the top of the stairs while you were still chatting away with the Sheriff, and we didn't see you come up at all."

The Sheriff pulls her head out from her rug and dons her wide-brimmed white hat, tilting it low over her eyes. Pace puts the book back on the shelf and laughs a little, "Oh, yeah, that's because I... uh..." I grin. Applejack was the worst liar I'd ever seen. I don't think I've ever seen her lie. Heck, she couldn't even spin her answer when someone asked for the truth. I put the cushions back on the couch and sit down.

"You were... doing what? The bathroom's on the second floor, so you couldn't have gone anywhere else." The Sheriff swaggers up and gets up close with Pace, "Maybe you were... HIDING A BODY!?" Her snout bumps into Pace's snout, causing both to scrunch. The Sheriff starts a staredown.

Pace frowns and gently pushes the Sheriff away, "Now, hold on jus' a minute. In this land, the law says I'm innocent until proven guilty!"

"I'm the law 'round here, and the law says don't avoid the question! Did you or did you not murder Sitting Pretty and hide the body?"



"I didn't have no hoof in anypony murderin' anypony else, ever." Applejack had to be telling the truth if she said it with that conviction. Or, at least, what she felt to be the truth.

"What were you doing, then? Since you didn't go to the bathroom." I lean forward on the couch, head in my hands and arms on my knees. "You were gone for a long time, right, Sheriff?" The Sheriff nods. I continue, "So you must have been doing something during that time. Care to tell us what?"

Pace frowns, averting her gaze, "I ain't gotta tell you what business I had. 'sides, for all we know, Sittin' Pretty is jus' sleepin' in her bed, or maybe playin' a practical joke on all of us!"

The interrogation is interrupted by a cry from upstairs, "WE FOUND HER!" Pace is eager, and leaves before either the Sheriff or I could say anything. We hustle up the stairs and, like Pace said, found Sitting Pretty on her bed. Pinkie Pie was fine, of course. She splayed herself over the bedsheets and left her tongue lolling out in mock death. She jumps up once we enter the room, and begins reading from another piece of paper.

"Everypony can see the tragedy before them. Sitting Pretty is dead. The scene laid before you is..." Pinkie Pie looks up from the notes, "Okay, everypony! Time to reveal your evidence cards." We begin shuffling through our hands. I step forward first, holding my card. Pinkie Pie flops down on the bed.

"There are rope marks around her neck. The cause of death is strangulation, and it must have been done with rope." I lay the card down, and return to the circle around the bed.

Nopony else comes forward with evidence.

"Is... that all we have?" I look around the group. Most avoid my eyes.

Apple Bloom frowns, "C'mon, now. Pinkie Pie, don't they gotta give up the evidence?"

Pinkie Pie shakes her head, "Nope!" She flops her tongue out again.

"Then how are we supposed to solve who killed you? Shouldn't the crime have more obvious clues?"



Pinkie Pie shakes her head once more, "All other obvious clues were cards handed out at the start, or left behind at the scene of the crime! You gotta find 'em or convince other ponies to share! The clock is ticking. Anypony could be the next victim... mwahahahah!" She rubs her hooves and bursts into maniacal laughter. I just shake my head.

"Sheriff, looks like Sitting Pretty didn't invite too many friends over."

The Sheriff nods, "Well, by the powers invested in me as Manehatten Sheriff, I'm puttin' y'all under my supervision until we get this sorted out! Nopony's allowed to leave. Now, I gotta call the department in."

The Deputy flies over to the Sheriff's side, "Sheriff, wait. We don't need to get the whole department involved! We can solve this ourselves!"

"Now ain't the time for yer glory-hog antics, Deputy! We got ourselves a cold-blooded killer on our hands, and we need all the help we can get."

The Deputy alights in front of the Sheriff and pleads, "Sheriff, just give us a couple hours!"

"One hour!" Pinkie whispers.

"Yeah, whatever, one hour! Let me prove myself."

The Sheriff frowns, "... Alright. Against my better judgement, I'll give you a chance to crack this case within an hour. This'll be yer final test to see if you're a worthy successor."

The Deputy pumps her hoof, "Yes! I'm gonna crack this case like a peanut! With time to spare."

Dash in charge of solving a mystery? Tonight's going from a murder mystery straight into comedy. I think I'll sit back and enjoy the show.