For Day 5 (June 23rd, 12:52 PM)

Darlin,

I'm writin' this a day later cause I ended up bein' real busy yesterday after we stopped talkin'. Finally went to a show though, it was an ice skatin' one.

It's funny cause in the last letter you're gonna read before I got back, I wrote that I wanted you to tell me more of the play and ya did.

I reckon I'm shit at goodbyes. It's... why I don't say goodnight most nights. Sometimes I do fall asleep, but a lot of the time I get real tired and decide to go to sleep. But I don't like sayin' goodnight, cause what if I have more to say? What if I can't sleep? What if you need me and don't say so cause you think I'm asleep? I don't like it. Better at just leavin' I guess. Part of the charm?

Gotta admit, my connection dropped yesterday so I just read your letter right after to get more closure. Readin' about a relationship endin' and your thoughts on it didn't really help my mood much. Mostly why I didn't write a letter after. Just bad timin'.

I'm interested in readin' the end of the play tomorrow. It seems real good actually, the host wants to read it.

Yours,

Jesse

Day 5 (June 23rd, 1:05 PM)

Hanzo,

Just like the last one, I'm writin' this a day later. You talked to me yesterday so I reckon this'll be fairly short.

Snorkelin' in St. Martin was the best of the trip. There was a helicopter and some statues. Reckon they put them there on purpose as a cheap trick to make it more interestin' and I gotta admit, it works. The host's brother actually dove down and swam through the cockpit. I would've too but cause I'm so congested, divin' down that deep is killer on my ears.

Our connection cut off right after you made a real good dick joke so I reckon it was the best timin' this whole cruise. I napped for half an hour and then the host got ready to do family pictures, we went to dinner, and after that I ended up gamblin' some. I like cards more than I like slot machines but the host's parents didn't let me do cards. Reckon that makes sense, you gotta be real smart with it. After that, we went and saw one of the ice skatin' shows. It was alright but the show started at 10:30 at night and I was so damn sleepy cause we'd been up since 6. Afterwards, I just went to bed.

Hope your day is goin' well. I love you a lot.

Yours,

Jesse

Day 6 (June 23rd, 1:28 PM)

Sirius Motherfucking Black,

Is it lame that I want to write you a letter just to make you a quick playlist? You've had to go a week without me subjecting you to my music taste, I'm sure you're really excited for me to force it onto you in the middle of the ocean. This is a Danny McCree one, I think.

A Map A String A Light - Yvette Young
Into the Well - Mree
Elijah - Matthew and the Atlas
Skylark Interabang?! - Made In Heights (this samples a Sufjan song and fucked me up very bad when Spotify played this and then suddenly it wasn't Sufjan [also if you don't know what song, some extra required listening: Concerning the UFO Sighting Near Highland, Illinois - Sufjan Stevens])
Lonely - Idealism

The other fun thing about writing it in a letter is that if you don't want to listen to it, you don't have to and I just won't know.

(11:46 PM)

I stopped midway through writing and I felt bad just continuing as if it was the same thought. I keep trying to get Jess to write but he doesn't really want to. We've been doing a lot by ourselves today, he's done a lot of thinking I guess. I want to talk about what we did but then I think he might write so I don't want you to hear the same fucking story all over again.

He's been looking for service for most of the day to text Hanzo but we are literally in the middle of the ocean so it doesn't matter. I'd write about his feelings but there's so many and it's all shit you'll hear later I'm sure.

OH SHIT OKAY ALSO he's obviously emo but like this made me laugh. We were in the shower, alone in the room, and he whips out that showerhead and goes to town but the dumbass thinks about Hanzo too much and he starts crying and had to stop. Can you believe it? I made sure to laugh at him (only a little after I made sure he was okay).

Jess is really concerned about Hanzo's letter for today. It just mirrors the shit they're going through right now too much and he's being dumb. I'll try and get him to write. He's being weird and isolationy, he's in like a "I spent 10 years alone in the desert with no one but myself" kind of mood but he'll just melt when he's with Hanzo again so I'm not super worried. It's just a little awful when I take control of the body and suddenly I'm standing in the casino after he slammed hard liquor.

I LOVE YOU AND I MISS YOU I COME BACK SOON.

Moony

Day 6 (June 23rd, 1:20 AM)

Hanzo,

I like the casino. The fun thing about gamblin' is that almost everyone in there believes in luck. They believe that some tables got more luck than others. Sure there's statistics and tricks to remember, but the most important thing is pickin' a lucky table or a lucky machine. A lot of 'em don't believe in anything like that except when they're gamblin', then there's that little extra somethin' that they got to find to win.

The host's family is full of gamblers on their mother's side. I like gamblin' but I got shit luck so I wouldn't do it too often for money. In canon it was different, dunno if my luck was any better but I could cheat a good game. Now I don't got that kind of money and I don't got a good reason to waste it.

I spent a whole lot of the day thinkin'. Feel bad cause I don't got a lot new to bring to the table on our whole... thing but meditatin' enough got me new memories so that's somethin'. A few were from my werewolf but I got some from Reversewatch too. Guess that's a canon of mine for sure now. We can talk about it when I'm back though, honey.

There's a Boardwalk on the ship that's got a carousel and they serve hot dogs and the whole shabang. Supposed to be like a carnival. We enjoy it. They have a whole art display on how they carve and paint the wood horses for the carousel. I sat and got ice cream and it was real cute cause a little girl sat at the table across from me and she wanted my ice cream so bad. She would mimic me and open her mouth each time I took a bite. Made me smile a lot.

Spent most of my day in the Solarium. It's a real big glass room at the front of the ship with a view of the ocean. It's got a pool and some real big chairs with pillows right by the glass. We took a book and read for a while.

Been missin' you lately. I say lately as if it ain't been this whole damn week but ya understand. I just wanna be near you mostly.

Yours,

Jesse

P.S. I wanna at least show you my house in Minecraft, remind me to try and figure out how to do that.

Day 7 (June 24th, 10:17 PM)

My Sweetheart,

I end up bein' able to make better conversation with little kids than folks my own age. Guess I give off the feelin' that I work with kids even when I ain't at work.

I made friends with a little girl because I was standin' next to her at the parade. Her name was Julianna and her favorite Dreamworks movie is "Kung Fu Dragon" till I said How to Train Your Dragon was my favorite to which she replied "that's my favorite too!" Later durin' the parade I watched her go up to Stoick and he thought she wanted a hug but actually she just pulled his beard instead. Made me laugh.

It's the last day but I didn't do a whole lot. Got lunch and went to the pool but we had an early dinner so I wasn't there too long. We went to the hibachi place on board, it was good. Afterwards we looked at pictures we'd taken on board then watched a parade.    It was evenin' by then so I had to pack.

I'll be in port by the time I wake up tomorrow mornin'. I get to wake up to you, I don't got words for how much I'm lookin' forward to it. I miss you so bad it hurts.

Yours Always,

Jesse