Didney Worl: The Most Ludicrous Place On Earth!

Have you ever though "What if there were a parodic theme park that wasn't a bunch of pretentious wank?" Well, BonBon Land exists, but for those of you who aren't German, there is also Didney Worl; the not-yet-real park that manages to be both bult out of sincere love and a tomfoolery mirror of mockery for theme parks; sort of like Mad Magazine before Bill Gaines died!

Note that this plan for a theme park is completely open-source, because lord know I could never get the funds to make it, as long as I; Thomas F Johnson, am credited prominently as creator, and also a neon simulacrum of my head is put within a prominent place of the park Mussolini-style, ever staring; ever watching!

*Crazy Crossroads!*
-Statue of CV Wood and Satan- A Tribute to the man who built Our Distinguished Competition, and then was caught embezzling and had to get the hell out of dodge!
-Banksy Simulator-
-The Maws of Entrance-
-The Pavilion of Nonexistent Nations-
-The Hall of Radicals-
-The All Uncle Klunk Jamboree!- Licensed from
-The Defunct Attractions Tribute-
-The Museum Of Internet Culture-
-The People ReMover-
-Gulliver Corpse-
-Tree Of Death/Oil Rig- To equal the Tree Of Life, we made the exact opposite, the same kind of oil rig The Tree Of Life was ironically built on, dripping with authentic oils, authentic fire, and authentic-as-it-can-be-while-still-passing safety regulations chemical waste and hazards to life and limb! See the ornate carvings, which totally aren't workers plastered on by irresponsible drilling practices, and ride down the greasy slide that definitely won't make you feel an itchy burning sensation on your taint in the morning.
-Princess Nothing's Pomo Abomination-
-The Night-Ending Fireworks Show/FIRE TIME-
-Mocky Maus-

*Technically Legal Rides*
-The Greatest Coaster In The World (This Is Just a Tribute)-
-C'est Non Un Ride-
-The Saucer of Indoctrination-
-Submarines-
-Massive EPA Violation Mine-
-Creeping Madness River-
-Expedition Broken @#$%ing Piece Of $%&@ Temple-
-The Blunder Wheel-
-Tilt-A-Wheel-Of-Pain-
-The Pit And The Pendulum Ride-
-Crazy Charlie's Helter Skelter- Like that one song-we-legally-are-only-allowed-to-use-a-soundalike-of, you go up to the top of the slide and go down to have a ride then you go to the top again! All the while seeing the imagery and listening to the philisophical stylings of good ol' Charlie Manson, who's views our lawyers have required us to state do not represent our organtion. They told us this while swigging fifths of gin and saying "Fucking really?!" as we signed the forms.
-Escape From Jersey- BABY THIS TOWN RIPS THE BONES OFF YOUR BACK ,IT'S A DEATH TRAP, IT'S A SUICIDE RAP!
-The "Stunt" Coaster Of Dubious Condition- They can't sue you if it's supposed to feel horrifyingly unsafe!
-Topple Tower-
-The Swinging Ship Mutiny-
-Rent A Bumper Car- But beware, when you run out of fuel, it's time for Pterry the Reaper to come in your
-The Whimsy Factory [Formerly Killoweiss' Heavy Metal Murder Meat Machine]
-Mr. Bones Wild Ride-
-Terrorist Shootout- And they release "squibs". Sure. Let's call them squibs.
-It's A World United Via Imperialism After All- Under the thumb of glorious corporate hegemony! BEcause remember, WE HAVE CON-TROL! WE KEEP YOU SAFE! WE ARE YOUR HOPE!
-Breaky The Crash Test Dummy- We hired real lepers!

*Horror Hill!*
-Mr. Ghouly's Spook Train-
-Rylleh Playland!-
-The Tortures-We-Made-Up Museum-
-The Obscure-Figures Wax Museum-
-Actual Mythologically-Accurate Hell House-
-The Fleischer Memorial Ghost Cave-
-The Moloch FunSlide-
-Stalking Slashers-
-Le Absolute Fin Du Monde-
-The Ed Wood Stunt Spooktacular!-

*Licensed Land!*
-The Bowels of Trogdor-
-The Perpetually-Incomplete Adventures of The Thief And The Cobbler-
-Monster Party Monster Ride-
-The Terrible Movie Ride-
-Cryptworlds Crossing-
-The Candle Cove W$&%^*#-
-Starcrash Tours-
-The Wacky World of Edmund McMillen!-
-Forbidden Zone: 6D!-
-All Yesterdays Plausible Dinosaurs-
-Robopon World Store-
-Pentex World of [Corrupting] Energy-
-Bubsy's Autograph Shack-
-Shinji Ikari's Wild Ride!-
-The Defunct Packaged Goods Mascots Menagerie-
-Decapitron Stunt Spectacular-
-Summon The Plague!-

*Traction Park*
-Closed Due To Injuries Parade-

*Failed Futureland!*
-The Giant Malfunctioning Tesla Coil-
-The Carousel of Stunted Progress-
-Live Nude Animatronics!-
-The Monorail To Nowhere-
-Revenge Of The Space Monkeys-
-The Atomic Freakshow-
-Theater Of Tomorrow [Awaiting Renovation]- Our Friend Asbestos! Thalidomide and You! Mommy, Why Are We Worshipping The Geodesic Sphere As Our New God? The Story of Eugenics!
-The Waterpark of Tomorrow- WITH NO WATER AT ALL!
-The Hall of Mirrors Into Your Soul-
-The Public Domain Mourning Centre-
-The Protomen Musical Parable Of Revolutionary Futility-
-Fumbles The Tripping Robot-

*Bullroar Boardwalk!* At double the price of the Jersey Boardwalk, you get double the sleaze!
-Bootleg Bodega-
-These Games Are Rigged!-
-Shoot A Douchebag!-
-Mr. Zappy's Hardcore Laser Tag-
-The Ballpit of Filth-
-World Of We-Are-Legally-Compelled-To-Tell-You-About-All-The-Accidental-Deaths Trampolines-
-Mechanical Dating Sim Sim-
-The Orca Corpse Stunt Show- Through the aid of pneumatics and cannons!
-Heavy Petting Zoo- Fursuits
-HH Holmes Bouncy Murder Castle-
-Freeplay Plaza!-
-FoodTruck of Horrors-
-Condemned By The Health Department-
-GENERIC FOOD STAND-
-El Notadrugfrontos Sub-Par Tex-Mex Stand-
-No One Lives Forever-
-BURGRR NUTRITION OUTLET NUMBER DELICIOUS-
-Club 34-
-Hidden Mockey Church-

*The Kingdom Of Sensual Delights*
-Unused Remnants-

*Public Domain Superhero Land*
TO BE ADDED LATER

*Bibleland*
TO BE ADDED LATER

*Holiday Attractions*
COMING SOON